


The Odds of Fate

by Nix Nivalis (Risika13)



Series: Of Gods and Daemons [1]
Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Complete, F/M, Post-InuYasha, Romance, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-19
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-05-20 10:43:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 51
Words: 243,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14893136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Risika13/pseuds/Nix%20Nivalis
Summary: Naraku has long since been defeated. Kagome has returned. Life at the village is quiet and uneventful, punctuated by occasional daemon attacks and visits from a certain daiyoukai. Everything is at it should be. The only thing out of place, really, is the foreign woman who has taken up residence in the village after appearing at the base of the Sacred Tree. The villagers don't know what to make of her and her strange ways, as she struggles to adapt to the Feudal Era. And what happens when Sesshomaru suddenly needs her help?Time has already given the youngest of the Inu brothers a woman to contend with. Now it is the elder brother's turn.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Inuyasha is my favorite anime and one of my all time favorite shows. That being said, it has been a while since I've sat down to watch the entire thing. I will try to be as consistent as possible with characterization and story line. (Hopefully, with this taking place after The Final Act, the latter won't be as difficult!) 
> 
> It has been a very long time since I have posted any of my writings anywhere on the web and longer still since I have written fanfiction. But this story kept tumbling around my head and wouldn't leave me alone. I will try to update as regularly as possible. I cannot say how many chapters it will be or how long it will take to post them all. Honestly it could end up being a novella or a novel, depending on what the characters decide.
> 
> If you find any mistakes, such as spelling, grammar, continuity errors (I really hate those) and so on, or if you simply had a question, please feel free to comment! Thank you :)
> 
> Please enjoy!

"You know, sometimes I envy you, Kagome."

Kagome looked away from the sight of Inuyasha flat on his face, having Sat him yet again for smacking Shippo upside the head. (Some things never do change, not even after marriage.)

"What do you mean?" she asked.

Lucidity smiled and pushed several strands of hair from her face. "No man would ever tell me to make him a sandwich, joking or otherwise, if I could make him kiss the dirt like that."

"I wouldn't use the rosary beads on Inuyasha over food," Kagome said. "He just shouldn't be hitting people, especially children."

"I know, I know," Lucidity replied. "But don't tell me that the beads don't make it easier to deal with him. I'd kill for something like those; a lot of people would."

Kagome pursed her lips together. Sometimes this woman made her nervous. Her casual tone when talking about violence made it difficult to figure out if she was being serious or not. Then again, Kagome had to remind herself that before Lucidity came to Japan, she'd been working as an emergency dispatcher for several years. She'd dealt with violence on a daily basis, much like Kagome had when searching for shards of the Shikon no Tama. A person became used to it after a while.

"You wouldn't really kill anyone, though, right?" Kagome asked, offering a smile, unwilling to think the worst of someone. "No matter how much you wanted something from them?"

"Of course not," Lucidity said. "I mean, not over a material item. The bastard would really have to deserve it."

"Er...." That wasn't exactly reassuring.

Lucidity glanced over at Kagome, then shook her head and looked away, as if she could read her thoughts. "I don't think I could ever hurt someone like that," she said. "Killing is more than just taking a life. It's destroying everything a person might become, what he'll do or accomplish, children he might have. There is nothing insignificant or easy about murder."

Tension drained from Kagome's shoulders. Three months it had been since Lucidity arrived in the confusion of a thunderstorm and they still knew so little about her or what had brought her here. Kagome was only starting to get used to her; Lucidity wasn't the most social of people. She'd seemed so frightened at first, after being found among the roots of Goshinboku. Kagome couldn't help but feel sorry for her.

They sat side-by-side on a small hill, looking down at the gathering of Kagome's family: Inuyasha and Shippo, Miroku and Sango, with all of their children. Kagome had invited Lucidity along that morning to enjoy a rare moment of relaxation. Before long, Kagome would have to make her rounds in the village, as would Miroku, while Sango remained with their ever growing brood. And Inuyasha would most likely accompany his wife, at least until something dragged him away, a request from Kaede or a villager; someone always needed help. Life was busy and full and Kagome had never been happier. The only uncertainty here was sitting right beside her, quiet and pensive.

"In all seriousness," Lucidity said after a short while, "I _do_ envy you, Kagome. You have it good here. A home, a family. And if it wasn't for you, the village would never have helped me. Having you as a friend makes it easier and I'm very grateful for you."

"I...wow, Lucidity, I don't think you've ever paid me a compliment like that before. Thank you," Kagome said with a rush of warm affection and a sense of guilt. Lucidity wasn't so bad. A little odd, but there was nothing evil about her.

"I don't ever pay people compliments like that," she replied. "I'm not big on the whole sharing emotions thing."

"Not since your dad?"

"Not since ever. He complained about it a lot." Lucidity gave a bitter smile that was closer to a grimace as she fiddled with a silver chain around her neck that was mostly hidden by the green tunic she wore.

Kagome put a hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up."

Lucidity shrugged the hand off. "It's okay. It's been over a year since he passed away; it's easier to talk about."

Kagome switched tactics. "You've been doing well, settling in here. Kaede told me you're picking up on herbs quickly, and learning how to do day-to-day activities. I know it's very different from the modern era and difficult at first, but you seem to be adjusting."

Lucidity shrugged. "I guess. I don't have much of a choice, anyway, so I need to learn everything I can."

"It gets easier, I promise."

"I didn't choose this like you did, Kagome," Lucidity said, and the coolness in her voice silenced the young priestess. "I'm sorry. I know you're trying to be all comforting, but that's the difference between us. You chose, I didn't. You're wanted, I'm not. I could never belong here; I need to find a way home."

"And we've looked into it. Miroku has asked others when he travels for work. Inuyasha is having Myoga search. Even Shippo has asked the youkai he trains with if they know anything. We _are_ trying, but there's a chance we might not find the answers we need. There's a chance that...we may not find out how to get you back."

Lucidity was silent. Kagome watched as she stared resolutely down at the group, at Inuyasha who was now upright, glowering at Kagome now and then; at Miroku who was teasing Sango while she breastfed their youngest infant; and Shippo, who was rolling around in the grass.

"Lucidity?" Kagome pressed.

"I've already considered the possibility," she murmured. "Every night since I came here. Trust me, it's all I think about."

"You still have a home here," said Kagome. "You say that you're not wanted, but that isn't true. Many of the villages are fond of you. You do your share and more when it comes to helping everyone. And, personally, it's nice to have someone else from the twentieth century, someone to relate to. Or at least someone who gets my pop culture references."

"We're from two different cultures," Lucidity pointed out.

"Ah, yes, but at least we both knew who Mickey Mouse is."

Lucidity laughed and Kagome smiled. 

"And you know," Kagome continued, "I think some of the village men might be interested in you. I've heard them say how pretty and exotic you are and-what's wrong?" she asked at the suddenly sobered expression on Lucidity's face. "I know it's not common in this era for people from different countries to get together, but it wouldn't be so bad, would it? Finding someone to spend the rest of your life with?"

"And who in his right mind would want a foreign spinster?"

"What? But you're not that old. You're fresh out of college, right? Only twenty-one?"

"Twenty-two," Lucidity corrected, getting to her feet. "And an old maid, as far as standards here are concerned."

"But-"

"Oi! Lucidity!"

Sango's voice cut off any possible reply from Kagome as the two women peered down at the daemon slayer.

"You aren't leaving, are you?" Sango called up. "I thought we were practicing this morning."

"We are," Lucidity assured her. "Let me get the staffs."

And she hurried off, without so much as a farewell to Kagome. With a sigh, Kagome rose and brushed herself off, and was soon joined by Inuyasha.

"I can't believe I actually missed this," he grumbled, tugging at the rosary beads.

"Well, if you would just behave, I wouldn't have to use them," Kagome replied.

Inuyasha folded his arms with a scoff. A movement down below caught his attention. Kagome looked, too, and saw Lucidity returning with two training staffs, which she and Sango had brought this morning. 

"It's interesting, don't you think?" Inuyasha said out of the blue.

"What is?"

"Lucidity. She's trying to learn so many different things."

"I think she's just trying to survive the village."

"Then why train? The village is well protected," he said. "Within the first month, she started taking lessons with Sango. She's having Kaede teach her about healing. She's been asking Miroku about his work as a monk. And she's also been asking all of us about youkai. At first I thought she was just curious, but she spends so much time shut up in her hut. She never tells anyone what she's doing, and she never wants to let anyone inside. She's up to something, Kagome; I can feel it."

"Maybe she only wants to know how to stay safe," Kagome insisted. "This era can be scary. At least when I first came here, I had a way home. I was able to adjust gradually to everything. Lucidity is stuck here. And, to be honest, I think it's more dangerous for her than it ever was for me."

Inuyasha blinked. "Huh? What do you mean?"

"Before long, foreigners won't be tolerated. They may even be killed on sight. It isn't safe for her to venture outside the village."

Inuyasha's expression narrowed into a frown and he peered down at Lucidity, who was standing off with Sango now, with the children and Miroku watching from the sidelines, Shippo sitting on the monk's shoulder. "I don't like the idea of her being here permanently," Inuyasha muttered. "I don't trust her."

"I know, but we may not have a choice. We can't turn her away," Kagome said, stepping closer to lace their fingers together. "She's done nothing to warrant being thrown out of the village. She isn't bad, Inuyasha, just different, like you."

Inuyasha snorted and his grip tightened momentarily. "Fine," he agreed. "But if she ever starts causing trouble, she's out of here, the same as any other villager."

"That's fair," Kagome said, and laid her head on her husband's shoulder. She didn't believe her friend would create any problems, but still...she had this horrible, sinking sensation in the pit of her stomach. It felt like misfortune was just around the corner.


	2. Chapter 2

Sesshomaru was at a loss. A full moon had come and gone and the solution to his problem had yet to be discovered. The location was found without incident, but gaining entry was the true obstacle in this matter. Brute force alone was not enough. This much was proven within the first hours in his attempt to break through the barriers. Not even the likes of Bakusaiga could obliterate what stood in his way. Jaken made effort with prayers and offerings when Sesshomaru had exhausted all paths at hand. The seals were strong in their defiance. The very sight of them had begun to fill him with irrational fury, mocking him with their very presence. This unfortunate outcome of failure was what eventually drove Sesshomaru into seeking answers elsewhere, to seek...aid.

His search over the past few weeks had yielded no results. A visit to an old hoarder of knowledge had set him on a course he could see no end to. By no means did he concede defeat. He would continue hunting down what he needed in order to tear through the barrier that stood between him and his goal. The only issue at hand was he did not know where to find the last piece of the puzzle, and that was how he came to be at such a loss.

So, for now, he sought distraction, to regain his thoughts and perhaps approach the issue from a new angle. At the moment, he was set on completing a much simpler task: tracking Rin down. In spite of the cluster aromas and smells that bombarded his senses in this village of humans, he picked out Rin's scent without difficulty. He followed it beyond the many huts and fields that made up this little world. And the further he had to walk, however, the stranger he found the situation. He was approaching the outskirts of the village, where fewer dwellings had been built and certainly were not inhabited by reputable members of the community, if inhabited at all. The area was desolate and unkempt, which was the reason it came as a surprise to find the numerous scents of people nearby, far more than just Rin. As he drew nearer, he saw smoke rising from a single hut on the very edge of the path, the only one next to the small stream that cut through here. There was not a soul in sight, but he could hear movement from within the small home and the soft murmur of voices. Suddenly, the hanging in the doorway shifted. 

Rin appeared, her expression curious for a moment before registering what she saw. "Sesshomaru-sama!" she cried out, rushing down the path to greet him with familiar smile and ever present excitement. 

"Rin," he said. "I trust you have been well in my absence?" 

The girl nodded. "Very well, Sesshomaru-sama ," she answered. "Is Jaken-sama with you?" 

"He comes." 

Rin peered around his legs to find that he did, indeed, speak the truth, as the imp came into view, panting with the effort of keeping pace with the daiyoukai. Rin dashed forward with an equally enthusiastic cry and flung her arms around Jaken. 

"Let go of me, you silly girl!" he shouted, his arms flailing, the Staff of Two Heads waving in the air. 

"It's good to see you, Jaken-sama," Rin said as she stepped away, arms behind her back, still smiling. 

"Yes, yes," replied the imp, brushing himself off, and fixed her with a hard look that held no signs of true anger. "What are you doing all the way out here, anyway? Aren't you living with that priestess, Kaede?" 

"I was helping a friend," Rin answered, pointing to the hut. 

"Hmph," grunted Jaken. "Nothing good will come from associating with such unsavory people."

"Unsavory?" repeated Rin.

"Only the lowest and most useless live out here. Has no one explained this to you?!"

The girl shook her head.

Again, Jaken grunted and opened his mouth to speak once more.

"That is enough," Sesshomaru said in his soft timber. "Come, Rin."

There was no argument as he turned on his heel and led the way back to more respectable areas of the village; he intended to have words with the old priestess about the people permitted around his ward. Jaken and Rin followed in his wake, with Jaken attempting to explain social standings to Rin and comparing this friend of hers to likes of those who stole and never earned their keep. Rin never spoke, but her expression grew confused and uncertain.

"What troubles you, Rin?" Sesshomaru asked.

The girl stopped and looked up at him, her eyes moistening with the threat of tears. "I don't understand," she replied. That much was obvious. "My friend isn't like that. She doesn't take from others. She's nice...."

"All part of the deception," Jaken said. "There is a reason she was put out here, away from the community; you should stay away from her, too."

Rin glanced between the two, at the stubborn imp to the daiyoukai, who took in everything with a measuring gaze.

"Sesshomaru-sama?" murmured Rin. "What...what should I do?"

A rustling drifted up from the hut, followed by footsteps, signaling that the sole occupant had ventured outside. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jaken turn in the direction of the noise, and then gasp. "Look at that!"

Sesshomaru glanced over to sate his now increasing curiosity and felt his lips part in surprise.

"Look at that," Jaken repeated. "Have you ever seen such a human, my Lord?"

A mane of yellow hair tumbled down the woman's back in thick waves, catching the light of the sun, much like his own strands of silver. She was tall, he noted, taller than any human female he'd come across. Dressed in what he recognized as youkai silk, she moved across the front of the hut, stringing out herbs along the awning to dry. She worked the thread diligently with her fingers, seemingly unaware of their presence.

"A gaijin," Jaken continued. "No wonder she was placed out here."

"Eeto...Sesshomaru-sama?" murmured Rin with a tug to his sleeve. "Does this mean I can't be friends with her?"

Sesshomaru peered down at Rin. "Where does she come from?"

The girl bit down on her lip and released his sleeve. "I don't know."

Sesshomaru returned his attention to the woman, and was taken aback to find her watching the group. Their eyes met. Blue, he realized, like the sky that crested the trees behind her. She didn't so much as flinch as she continued looking at him, her expression smooth, unreadable. But there was something calculating in her gaze, a focus that was almost unbecoming. Her eyes flicked back and forth, taking in Rin and Jaken, before returning to the daiyoukai. A minute tilt of the head. The movement suggested intrigue, but her face betrayed nothing. Sesshomaru felt his irritation rise at the forwardness of her manner.

And then he heard laughter. Her indifferent countenance broke. Surprise filled her face and she bolted off the porch, to dash behind the hut. The shrieks of delighted children filled the air, followed by more uproarious laughter, and a ringing voice that shouted words he did not recognize. And the moment she was out of sight, several more children ran from the treeline and into the hut. A diversion, he realized, and so did the woman, who reappeared seconds later, in spite of the commotion she had left behind.

"They're always causing her trouble," Rin said sadly, as the woman disappeared behind the hanging, followed by more shouting.

"Uncouth brats," muttered Jaken.

Said uncouth brats came rushing out, three boys altogether, with the woman right behind them. The children each carried several items. Mostly paper and a couple of pottery items. One, however, held a staff in his hands and was making a break from the forest. It was this one the woman went after and soon caught up with. She snatched the staff from the boy's grip, and spun the length of wood to deliver a hard blow to his backside. His yelp of pain caused the other two to stop and stare, ignorant of any danger, until the woman turned towards them. They immediately darted off in different directions, including the one now crying and clutching his hindquarters.

"That isn't yours!" Rin shouted to one of them who ran past her, clutching several sheets of paper. "Give it back! Sesshomaru-sama?"

"I will not become involved in this foolishness, Rin," he replied. "We are done here."

Once more, he started along the path back to the village. The boy was already well ahead of them, still gripping the paper he had stolen. As he rounded the bend in the hillside, Sesshomaru caught a glimpse of the writing. Strange words that were shocking in their familiarity. Not certain if he had seen correctly, but having little choice in the matter, he pursued the child, ignoring Jaken when asked where he was going. The boy had barely made it another half dozen steps before Sesshomaru was there and seized the back of his clothes, hoisting him into the air.

"Hey, what are you doing?! Let me go!"

Flailing limbs were ignored as Sesshomaru reached up and took the paper from the boy, before dropping him unceremoniously onto the ground. "Leave," he said. "Do not return." By the time Rin and Jaken arrived, the boy was disappearing from view. Sesshomaru was scanning the paper, studying markings that he could not understand, but were, all the same, painfully well known to him.

"Sesshomaru-sama," panted Jaken, "what is it? Why did you go after that human?"

"Return to the village with Rin. I wish to speak to the gaijin alone."

"What?! But-"

"Go," Sesshomaru ordered, effectively silencing any further protest, and returned to the hut, absent his retainer and ward.

He found the woman outside by the creak, on her knees with her back to him, and surrounded by an odd assortment of materials. Cuts of animal fur were strewn about the ground, along with slabs of stone, and broken pieces of damp cloth she apparently had pressed between the fur with the stones weighing them down. Mounted on the side of the creak was a tiny watermill that powered a small rotary machine, which, in turn, was beating a white, almost frothy substance to a pulp inside a decent-sized bucket. And then Sesshomaru notice the drying racks that had been knocked over, and the white material that littered the grass; the woman made her own paper.

Sesshomaru took in all this in a matter of seconds, during which time the woman jerked her head around at his footsteps, already rising to her feet, staff in hand. She blinked upon recognizing him, but regarded him warily as she stood.

"Yes?" she said. "What do you want?"

Her accent was noticeable, but she spoke his language with ease. He approached her and held out the stolen items he had recovered. Her eyes darted to his hand, then back to his face before she reached out like one would do with an unfamiliar animal, not knowing if she was about to be bitten. She took the papers and was quick to step away; he did not miss how her grip tightened on the staff.

"I doubt you're returning these without reason, but thank you," she said.

"Why do you believe that?" he asked, knowing she had been too far away to hear his refusal to Rin's plight for his help.

"You're Sesshomaru, right? Inuyasha's older brother?" she replied. "It's my understanding that you do not generally help others, especially random strangers."

His eyes narrowed. "And who are you to be so familiar with me?"

"No one," she said. "An unbidden guest of your brother and sister-in-law."

Sesshomaru felt his irritation return. "Do not so freely associate me with that hanyou and his woman. Now you will answer me, human: who are you?"

The woman's brows hiked towards her hairline as a distinct haughtiness filled her features. "Is that so?" she asked, folding the paper and tucking it into the leather clothing that wrapped around her midsection. She gripped the staff with both hands and leaned against it. Surely she did not intend to fight him? If she knew who he was, she would be a fool to believe she had a chance of surviving against him. "What difference would it make if I gave you a name?" she continued. "I'm a human, female, and a gaijin in all sense of the word, permitted to remain in an isolated part of the village by the good graces of Fate that I have more in common with their beloved priestess than most in this world." She shifted the staff to lean her other shoulder into it. "At this point, Sesshomaru, I believe there is only one pertinent question here: why have you sought me out?"

Sesshomaru's claws clicked together. The woman was not wrong. Her identity made no difference, but her impudence was infuriating. How dare she speak so casually to him! A lowly mortal of no standing, who refused to answer him. If his need was not so dire, he would have left her to the torments of children and the solitude forced upon her by the village. Yet, he reminded himself of the reason he was here, of why he had deigned to grace her with his presence.

"The writing," he said, "is it yours?"

Her brow drew down in confusion as she stared at him. "It is. Why?"

"Are you fluent in it?" he asked, ignoring her question.

"Very," she replied. "Why? Are you in need of a translation?"

What were the odds? he thought. To find a human in Inuyasha's village who read and spoke the language that was the key to getting what he wanted?

"That is correct," he said. "Something was taken from me and my efforts to reclaim it have so far been in vain. A translator is necessary to have what is mine returned."

"And you just happened to find one in your brother's home," she said, a hint of amusement in her voice. "What odds must be in your favor."

He frowned at hearing his own thoughts echoed back at him. "Indeed," he said, and then swallowed some measure of his pride before speaking again. "If you are agreeable, I would have your assistance; it will require a brief absence from the village."

"No," was the short, immediate response.

Sesshomaru paused. "...no?"

"That is correct," she answered with a mocking smile. "Rin has told me stories of her travels with you. I have enough going on here. Wandering the countryside with a daiyoukai is too risky an endeavor for me."

"You claim cowardice to be your reason?" he demanded, a sneer in his voice.

She shrugged. "I intend to survive this era of warring states and make my way back home; being in your company greatly reduces those chances. Besides..." Again, she shifted her grip on the staff. "I have no reason to help you, just like you had no reason to help me, until it so suited you. Now, if you don't mind, I have a mess to clean up thanks to those brats."

Sesshomaru had always understood the reason others found Rin's fondness for him so shocking. For the first time, however, he was able to experience an outsider's point of view. Rin called this woman "friend," and yet he could not begin to imagine why the girl would make such a claim about someone this hostile and unsocial. The very opposite of friendly. At least she was honest, he found himself thinking. She made no excuses, but told him her reasons. She had her own matters to deal with and wanted no part of another person's; he would have done no different.

Yet...so insufferable a female. Turning away, he decided it was best. He would locate another translator elsewhere, one more accommodating. 

Somehow.

* * *

 

Lucidity scooped the last of the ruined pulp back into the bucket. Hours of work destroyed in a matter of seconds. The little shits had managed to knock over all the stone slabs and tear apart the paper that was still in the process of having the water pressed out. Not to mention the damage they'd caused inside her hut as well, the writings that had been taken and lost to the wind. Tossing around her cooking supplies, even some food and herbs, before she caught up with them. Best to react on base instinct sometimes; the damage would have been greater if she had not realized their plans so quickly. Again, she thought back to the brief moment of coming upon the children by the water, upending the stones and throwing the squares of animal fur around, how they laughed and jeered like petulant gremlins at the sight of her. In that split second, she knew their intention was to drag her away, that their true goal was to rip apart the inside of her home, not the little workshop she kept behind it. No specific detail betrayed their game, but there must have been some telltale sign, like how a person suddenly knows he is being lied to, some subtle hint that was not consciously recognized.

Yet all this was only a minor encumbrance compared to what had graced her doorstep not an hour ago. She'd been told about Inuyasha's older brother within days of her arrival four months ago, but had never laid eyes on the youkai lord herself until today. His presence was a blanket of hair raising goosebumps, a tingle down the spine, the sensation of someone walking over your grave, and whatever other superstitious phrases that existed. She'd stopped sorting the herbs the moment she tasted that energy on the air and Rin, having noticed her attention suddenly on the door, had gone to investigate. Shrieks of "Sesshomaru-sama" had filled the air. And while Lucidity had been able to relax, she was wary of meeting the infamous elder Inu brother and it was a relief to find he had no intention of introducing himself.

With all the stories she had been told, from countless people other than the adoring Rin, she never once imagined that the daiyoukai would return, let alone to do so in order to request her assistance. She couldn't begin to imagine what sort of scenario demanded the use of her language or how it pertained to whatever dilemma Sesshomaru was in.

Must be something vital, she thought, for him to ask a human for help.

She did not regret turning him away, though. Kagome would have said she was heartless. Hell, a lot of people would agree. But, as she'd told Sesshomaru, she wasn't going to leave the village. Not yet. There was still so much to learn if she was going to survive this era. She couldn't risk everything and go off with some stranger, especially one who attracted powerful enemies. At least in the village she was safe...to an extent.

Her eyes narrowed as she laid the last of the fur squares to dry on the racks. Unwanted memories were being stirred, making her skin crawl. She shook her head and wiped her hands on the leggings she wore before she went through the motions of dismantling the rotary machine. As she worked, her thoughts drifted and again she found herself wondering old questions, now mixed with new ones.

What were the odds that she would be brought to a village where there was already a young woman from her time? That the villagers not only believed this woman, but referred to her, heeded her words as wisdom and took care to follow her instructions? And now, what were the odds that this woman's brother-in-law had need of Lucidity, of the very language she spoke? None of this could be coincidence. What twist of Fate had dragged Lucidity into this era of confusion, fear, and blood?


	3. Chapter 3

The clash of wood against wood filled the air. Sweaty brows furrowed and eyes narrowed in concentration, Lucidity and Sango danced back and forth across the balance beam outside of the latter's hut. Their staffs met again and again, each threatening to send the other crashing to the ground. But no final blow was forthcoming. The women parried, lunged, ducked, and at several points jumped in order to avoid being struck. Lucidity landed lightly back onto the beam, with no sign of losing her foot, and deflected another assault that would have gained Sango victory not too long ago. 

"You're a fast learner," Sango proclaimed. "Maybe it's time to raise the bar again." 

Lucidity grinned, but did not respond as she attacked once more. 

She recalled, albeit dimly, when the wooden beam they stood upon rested directly on the ground. It had been all she could do to keep her balance while Sango showed her the fine art of...well, whatever this was. (Perhaps an art long forgotten, considering this was the fighting style of the daemon slayers and Sango was one of the few left.) Was it only a handful of months ago that they had begun training? The balance beam had been raised steadily inch by inch the further along Lucidity progressed, until it was now several feet above the ground. Higher, Sango had said. "How much longer?" was what Lucidity wanted to ask. How much longer until she was good enough? How much longer until she stopped being afraid? 

A hard, well positioned blow made contact with her knee. Lucidity felt her leg crumple beneath her. The next thing she realized was pain lacing through her body as she lay on her back in the grass, gasping for the air that had been knocked from her lungs. Sango stood over her, not yet dismounted from the beam, and shook her head. 

"If you allow yourself to be distracted again, we'll go back to the basics, understood?" 

Lucidity drew in a tight, agonizing breath. "Yeah," she rasped. "Got it." 

Sango hopped down and extended a hand, helping Lucidity to her feet. 

"What next?" the daemon slayer asked. "Continue or shall we move on to the bokken?" 

Lucidity wiped the back of her hand along her forehead and wondered if she would be able to bathe later. "You have time?" 

"Rin is keeping an eye on the children; we have plenty of time." 

"Aye, you always seem to make sure to set aside more than enough for me," Lucidity said. "Thank you." 

"No need," Sango said, moving her staff into a ready position. "Teaching you helps keep my skills sharp." 

Lucidity smiled and jumped back onto the balance beam with nary a sound. "Let's continue, shall we?" 

The summer sun bore down on the women as they continued their practice under its unforgiving rays. Hair tied back, pants rolled up, Lucidity grew steadily sore and exhausted, drenched in sweat, every part of her aching because...well, Sango was a damn good shot. There would be countless bruises tomorrow. Scrapes. Cuts. Never before had Lucidity experienced such rigorous training from an unrelenting instructor. Sango was quick to correct and criticize in the same breath, and was under the strict belief that the reminder was not strong enough if it wasn't agonizing enough. The bloodied knuckles of Lucidity's hand could contest to that. And honestly...Lucidity loved every second of it. Positive results of any training were always rewarding. But it was the vigor of the training itself that made her relish the moment. The hard grind of heel in dirt. The sweet burn in the muscles. The blows that reverberated throughout the body when bracing against an opponent. The knowledge that every turn, every movement, every breath rooted the mind to what was happening then and there. She had never been so aware of her own heart beating inside her chest, through every muscle and fiber of her body. To feel so alive had never been so keenly experienced before.

And then the world came crashing back when Sango suddenly looked past Lucidity and spoke.

"What's Inuyasha doing here?"

Lucidity turned and saw an unmistakable red cladded figure coming towards them, absent of Kagome.

"Dunno," Lucidity said, relaxing out of her stance and letting the bokken she held rest against her leg. "Maybe Miroku or Kagome sent him."

"He looks mad; I wonder if he and Kagome had a fight."

"I thought that's what their marriage was: endless bickering?"

Sango tried and failed to stifle a smile. "Whatever he's coming here for, I suppose now is as good a time as any to call it a day," she said, setting her own bokken against the side of the hut with the staffs. Lucidity put hers down as well, but collected one of the long, wooden poles in turn. Sango's expression grew serious. "As for tonight," she added in a murmur, "I will tell everyone you're feeling unwell."

Lucidity glanced at her, then nodded heavily. "Thank you."

Sango shared a brief smile with her as the hanyou reached them. "Hey, Inuyasha," she greeted. "Has something happened?"

"Sort of," he answered, then pointed at Lucidity, who stared at him. "You come with me."

"What did _I_ do?!"

"Myoga's back; he wants to talk to you," said Inuyasha, already walking away.

"Gees! You couldn't lead with that? You scared me," Lucidity huffed as she followed him; at the same time, her pulse quickened. She felt a rush of excitement that was immediately quashed; she didn't dare let her imagination run wild or get her hopes up. Calling a brief farewell to Sango over her shoulder, she hurried to catch up with Inuyasha. "So, where's Myoga waiting for us?" she asked.

"I'm right here!" declared a disembodied voice that seemed to be coming from the hanyou directly. Upon closer inspection, she spotted the little dot bouncing on his shoulder. "My apologies for taking so long to return. I have been traveling far and wide, searching high and low for-"

"Keh! Save it, Myoga," scoffed Inuyasha as he settled down beneath the shade of a tree, adjusting Tessaiga so that it rested against his chest, instead of at his hip. Lucidity sat across from him, legs crossed, and laid the staff on the ground between them. "You were hopping around the countryside, enjoying the spoils of spring, instead of looking into just what the hell brought Lucidity here and how we're suppose to send her back."

"I would never, Inuyasha-sama!" Myoga shouted, jumping to the ground to look up at his master. "You set a task for me and I saw it to completion as quickly as I could. I'm not as young as I used to be; it's difficult for an old flea like me to get around."

"Oh? So that wasn't you Kohaku came across in the hot springs last month, feeding on the blood of any woman in reach?"

Small as he was, Lucidity could clearly see the sweat forming on the tiny creature.

"Er...well...that's...I was-"

"Just tell us if you found anything!" Inuyasha snapped.

Lucidity let out a slow breath; she'd just been about to say the same thing. Heart still racing, she had to swallow several times to calm herself as Myoga cleared his throat.

"I was unable to learn the direct cause of what brought Lucidity to our era the night of the storm," he began, and a stone dropped into the pit of Lucidity's stomach, tasting of bitter disappointment regardless her efforts.  "Despite what you may believe, Inuyasha-sama, I did travel far over the countryside. And all I can say for certain is that something is happening. There is great agitation among the youkai, whispers of some unknown entity."

"What's that have to do with me?" Lucidity asked.

"It all began around the same time you arrived," Myoga said. "I can't help but feel that this is not a coincidence. The further along I ventured, the more pronounced the presence of this entity became. There is a power that is rising. Up north, youkai are abandoning their homes, crossing territories and causing mayhem in their efforts to escape whatever is coming."

Inuyasha straightened, apparently quite keen on what he was hearing. "Is it heading this way?"

"I don't know," replied the flea. "But it would be wise to prepare for the possibility. There is more, however." Myoga folded his many arms and strained his neck from side-to-side, as though wondering how best to deliver the rest of his gut-wrenching news. "Once I learned what was happening, I went to visit an old Seer named Kaidame. Normally I wouldn't bother; he's half mad and almost impossible to haggle with."

"Haggle?" Inuyasha repeated.

"Yes," Myoga said, nodding. "He will not part with objects or even knowledge without something in return. And no one ever knows what he'll ask for. He might demand a mountain of gold from one person and a strand of hair from the next, even if it's for the same request." The tiny arms flailed in unexpected anger. "And he refused to make a deal with me!"

"You didn't have what he wanted?" Lucidity asked.

"No, I mean, he wouldn't deal, at all," Myoga said. "He already knew about what's coming, but when he heard about you, he had no interest in negotiating anything with me. He wants to bargain with you only."

"Her?!" Inuyasha exclaimed. "What for?"

"I have no idea," Myoga said miserably, arms falling to his sides.

Inuyasha scoffed. "He probably doesn't know a damn thing. I bet he just wants a good look at the gaijin."

Myoga shook his head. "Kaidame might be a bit unhinged, but he has never been known to lie. He claims to have what will help and will deal with Lucidity and no one else."

"What do you think?" Inuyasha asked the woman in question.

Lucidity, her mind spinning with this torrent of new information, looked up and blinked slowly at the hanyou.

"This is crazy," she said with a heavy sigh.

"I don't think you have a lot of options here," Inuyasha pointed out.

"I'm well aware of that." Lucidity glanced between the flea and hanyou watching her. "I'll go and meet this Kaidame." She clambered to her feet, staff in hand.

"You don't mean to leave right now?" Myoga asked quickly.

"Yeah, tonight's the festival," Inuyasha said, standing as well.

Lucidity's stomach tightened. "Yeah, no.... I mean, I don't intend to leave right this second. After the festival is fine. Was there anything else you needed to tell me, Myoga?"

"No, my dear," said the spec near her foot.

"Right. Good. I'll see you two later, then."

Lucidity walked off, gradually falling into her thoughts, but not before hearing Myoga ask, "Is she okay?" and Inuyasha's indifferent reply of, "Dunno. Come on, let's find Kagome and the others; they need to know about this, too."

Seers. Rising power. Unknown entities. Daemons running amok. When she left her country to escape reality for a while, this wasn't what she had in mind.

* * *

Cool water pounded over the naked skin of her back, a relief to the tension and aches the day had wrought. Lucidity stared up at the low ceiling of the niche behind the waterfall she had claimed as her own. Further removed from the village than even her hut, the waterfall was a small thing in the depths of the forest, discovered by happy accident when she decided to follow the creak upstream one day out of boredom. The portion of the creak it spilled into was about waist high and probably the closest thing she would get to a shower in this time period. The formation of rock behind the water allowed some semblance of privacy on days she decided not to bathe out in the open. Overall, it was perfect for her needs, if only there was a way to change the temperature to steamy hot in the winter. But for a warm day in the middle of summer, this was just fine with her.

And that was about the only thing that was fine. Everything else was just...shit.

People often dreamed about going on some epic adventure or visiting a far away land. Take a walk through the Shire. A trip through a wardrobe. Acceptance letter to Hogwarts anyone? Yeah, people dreamed. And people were also stupid. Lucidity would be lying if she claimed she never imagined what it would be like to find herself in some fantasy world. But this...this was like a nightmare she couldn't wake from. She hadn't felt safe since the moment she arrived. And the experiences so far had done little in the way of changing that.

At least she only had herself to worry about. Sure, there was family back home, extended or otherwise, but they would get along fine without her. There was only one person she really cared for in this world and that...well, it was the entire reason she ended up here in the first place. She had difficulty believing that her being here wasn't some random design and if she had not suffered so agonizing a loss, she never would have left home.

Inuyasha was right. She had no other options but to talk to the Seer. She needed answers and there was no other way. Whatever else was going on, it was none of her concern. Her focus was only on-

Lucidity shivered. Yet it had nothing to do with the water or any sort of chilly, non-existent breeze. The soft roar of the fall surrounded her, but could do little to blanket the sensation that crept over her skin. Goose bumps rose on her arms and she shuddered again, at the rush of energy that raced down her spine and caused the skin around her nipples to contract. Almost pleasurable, it was, but did not deter from the fact that she was not alone in the forest anymore. As the initial shock wore off, she concentrated, focusing on the source of what had disturbed her. She could feel it, the crackling power nearby, could taste it on the air, in the mist of the fall, and wondered if she was wrong. She swallowed and took a deep breath, calming her senses, before shifting towards the edge of the rock. An arm automatically wrapped around her breasts as she leaned out from behind the waterfall and peered skyward. No, not wrong. The source was definitely above her. Honestly, if she hadn't already been witness to many a strange spectacle since her arrival, she would have a great deal of trouble believing her own eyes. 

Sesshomaru. 

Flying through the air like some wingless god out of an ancient legend. 

A fair distance from her hiding spot, not too far above the trees, she could barely make out his features. She could see Jaken, the green imp whom Rin spoke so often of, hitching a ride on the great expanse of fur draped over Sesshomaru's shoulder. She also spotted a stretch of fabric in the daiyoukai's grasp, a vibrant combination of orange and red hues. A kimono for Rin, Lucidity realized, and almost too late in delivery for the celebrations. 

An all too familiar tension returned. Lucidity barely noticed in time, the silver head turning in her direction. She quickly ducked back into the niche, her heart pounding, the waterfall no longer the calm, soothing sanctity it had been moments ago. She had to return to the hut, make preparations for tonight. Tonight was the festival. Tonight she would not sleep. 

* * *

The throng of milling, half drunken people was enough to drive any sensible person into retreat. Their boisterous noise, the revolting odor of so many pressed together, and the blasts of occasional fireworks that lit up the night sky was more unnerving than a horde of daemons unleashed from the belly of the Underworld. Fumes of sake and the far more unpleasant stench of the resulting waste kept the youkai lord on the outskirts of the celebrations. Silently, Sesshomaru marveled at how the hanyou was able to not only cope, but enjoy himself in the midst of all this madness. Now and then he caught glimpses of Inuyasha's figure cutting through the crowd, accompanied by one human or another. Jaken was in there somewhere, as well, with permission from Sesshomaru to indulge as he wished; it was not so much permission as it was indifference with how the imp spent the night of festivities, given the condition that he would return to his lord's side in the morning.

Sesshomaru had lingered because he, too, had indulged...in the pleadings of a young girl far removed from the vicinity now. Rin had remained nearby in the beginning, bursting with excitement at both the festival and his visit, begging him to stay. But eventually she was drawn away, into the world of humans, with her own kind. Sesshomaru had watched her disappear with the other children and experienced a moment of bitter approval. Rin belonged here, where it was safe, not at his side where it could mean her death, one which she would never be revived from again. It was too dangerous, wandering the countryside with a daiyoukai. Too risky an endeavor.

His lip curled at the memory. Infuriating, that human, but she was right. Sesshomaru would not risk Rin's life and have her travel with him. But the woman, she was another matter. He did not care what happened to her; she was expendable, if the situation came down to it. She was also part of the reason he extended his visit to the village. His endless search had been in vain. She was his only option at hand. Yet it would be at great expense to his pride if he approached her a second time. He'd been deliberating over the decision in the days leading up to the festival and had yet to settle on his course of action. With what was at stake, he was willing to sacrifice some measure of dignity and ask for help. But to be refused and return, to ask a second time, was agonizing to imagine. He did not know if he could endure the humility. And so, his mind went in circles and he wondered again and again: what was he willing to sacrifice, his pride or what had been taken from him?

And that was why he found himself cutting through the forest near the gaijin's hut. His constant deliberating was the reason he had left Ah-Un outside the village in an area that would force him to take a direct route that brought him close to the woman, in an effort to force himself to come to a resolution, whatever it might be, before he departed in the morning. He had caught a glimpse of her earlier when he first arrived, attempting to conceal herself behind a waterfall. He had not been expecting to come across her so soon. It hadn't mattered; he would not have been able to stop even if he wanted to, not with Jaken present, and not with the woman to indecently exposed. Doubtful she would wish to bargain in such circumstances, for that was what he believed was needed. She refused to assist because there was no benefit in it for her, and he would be in her debt all the same if she did assist without expecting anything in return. It was only fitting to strike a deal.

Striking deals with humans, with a female gaijin of all people. Had he truly come to this? Had he no other options, no other actions that might be taken, in order to prevent one of the lowest moments in his life from coming to pass?

A movement out of the corner of his eye.

Sesshomaru stopped. And was immediately furious with himself for being so unaware of his surroundings. Granted, he'd been masking his presence, his aura, from any unwanted attention; and he'd known he was nearing the woman's hut, but did not imagine he would find her outside at this late hour, hunkered down in the grass. As before when he found her by the creak, the woman's back was to him. The full moon illuminated much of the forest, including her silhouette, and that, coupled with his youkai sight, allowed him to see that she was sitting with her legs drawn up and arms folded over her knees. She was facing the gaps of the trees, where her hut and the path leading up to it were just visible beyond the forest line. The movement he'd caught was the woman leaning her forehead against the same staff he'd seen that child attempt to steal. It was now at her side, held upright in one hand, and her profile was clearly visible to him, an expression of exhausted frustration on her face.

What a mad, hypocrite of a human. After spouting her refusal of being with a daiyoukai because it invited nothing but danger, she now disregarded all common sense and came outside after sundown, far from the safety of the village. Why was she not at the festival? Was it the decision of the villagers to exclude her from their social gatherings or did she not care for the company? If either was the reason, it still did not explain why she was outside in the dead of night.

Sesshomaru was content to leave the woman to her foolishness. If some low class youkai made a meal of her, at least it would eliminate the need for him to reach a decision. With that comforting thought in mind, he turned away. Perhaps a second visit to the hoarder of knowledge was needed at this point. If he was unable to get the help of this woman, it would be his best, possibly only choice.

"Kaidame."

The daiyoukai froze.

The woman repeated the name, carefully enunciating each syllable, as though testing how it sounded.

Slowly, Sesshomaru peered back around, staring incredulously. The woman was ignorant to his presence. She was gazing up at the canopy of leaves and stars, lost in thought, murmuring to herself. That name, over and over, as though chanting a mantra. Why? At this very moment, when he stood here, hidden from her and about to depart, why had she chosen to say it? And how? How did she know the name of the hoarder of knowledge, of the damned Seer? The Seer who had counseled Sesshomaru that he might find a translator in "the heart of his territory."

This had to be the answer. There was no other. She was the translator, the only one. The only course of action to take. Convinced now, he would do what was necessary. He took a step towards her.

The woman suddenly stiffened.

Sesshomaru frowned. Her back was still to him. She was focused on the hut, utterly oblivious of him. He noticed her grip tighten on the staff, saw her nails digging into the wood, and heard the murmur of voices drifting down from the path. Her scent shifted and Sesshomaru caught the sharp aroma of fear as two men approached.


	4. Chapter 4

"Dammit, where is she?"

"We checked everywhere possible back in the village, right?"

"Yeah. Only a few let the gaijin into their homes."

"That girl-what was her name?-she said the gaijin was ill. Did she go to Kaede-sama?"

"Rin. And no. I checked Kaede's hut; she isn't there."

Sesshomaru felt a growl trickle low in his throat, barely audible to his own ears, as the two humans searched the woman's hut, the daiyoukai listening to their carrying voices. These men were hunting her down and had used Rin to collect information on her whereabouts. Rin would have been ignorant of their plans and was the safest one to interrogate. His claws twitched. Safest as far as these imbeciles were aware of.

"Is this even a good idea? You know she's been trained by Sango."

"And what? If she attacks us, she'll be punished, probably exiled. She can't do anything and she knows it. Why do you think she's hiding?"

"Hiding?"

"Yeah. If she isn't at the festival and she isn't here, she must be hiding, the coward. She must have heard us and run off. Come on."

The two men exited the hut. Yet rather than depart for the village, they made their way over to the tree line, walking straight past the woman and daiyoukai. Lips pressing into a thin line of disdain, Sesshomaru watched the men pick their way through the forest, still searching, completely unaware that their prey was now rising to her feet and studying them with hard, narrowed eyes. If this had been any other human, Sesshomaru would not have bothered. He would have continued on his way. As it were, he was obligated to stay, to ensure that nothing happened to his translator. He could interfere, end this here and now so that he might speak with the woman. Yet he was intrigued. Had the woman been expecting trouble? Was that the reason she had come out to the forest, because she knew of these men and their intentions? If that was true, she could have easily concealed herself from them. And that meant she wasn't hiding, Sesshomaru realized. She was lying in wait.

The men were still going in the wrong direction. The woman followed. So did Sesshomaru. She stopped and he did the same. Her head tilted slightly and turned, as though she was straining to hear. The men were making a fair amount of noise. Even for a human, they'd be easy to track. The woman continued, her movements lighter, swifter, but there were moments, falters in her step, that needed improvement. She reached a clearing, Sesshomaru remaining a short distance away, concealed in the shadows, his aura muted. The men were beyond the clearing, their voices soft and indistinguishable. The woman crouched down, then straightened with something in her grasp. Sesshomaru spotted the twig right before she snapped it with her thumb. The sound echoed and she gasped at the same time, deliberately inviting further trouble. The men fell silent, then began to make their way back. Their renewed attempts at moving with a sense of stealth were pitiful, their footsteps heavy, hands reaching out blindly; a full moon could only do so much for humans. One man tripped over a root, just as they reached the edge of the treeline, directly opposite of where the woman had hidden herself.

At this angle, she was facing Sesshomaru. Her back against the tree, she turned her head to the side once more, listening to the men as they stepped out into the open. He watched as she held the staff with both hands, but noticed the grip of one was loose. The men were coming closer. The woman's stance shifted, feet spreading, and she raised an arm. A rock she'd been clutching was tossed, where it bounced off a tree some yards away. Like rats scenting food, the men changed their course and followed the noise. An advantage, Sesshomaru noted. The men had been walking directly towards her after she lured them back to the clearing, an open space where a staff was more favorable. They had been closing in, but now they were angling off to the side and she was moving around the tree, where they could not spot her. It placed her behind the men, out in the open. She was exposed, and so were they.

A cowardly tactic beneath the likes of a daiyoukai. For a mortal female, however, he could understand, even if he could not condone, the need for tricks and attacking when an opponent's back was turned. The first man she made short work of. The initial blow dazed and the second strike to the back of the knees brought him to the ground. A third to the face left him with a broken nose and a final kick to the head knocked him into a boneless, unconscious heap. All this in a matter of seconds, before the second male could fully comprehend what was happening. 

He charged the woman, spitting curses. She ducked, stepping around him, and the staff landed hard against his back. His momentum sent him sprawling. Sesshomaru circled the clearing, catching glimpses between the trees: the man attempting to rise, the woman knocking him over. Fresh blood was drawn. He stopped with the perfect view of the woman straddling the man, the staff across his chest, pinning him down. A flash of steal. The woman had unsheathed a dagger from its scabbard at the small of her back, hidden beneath the folds of the strange, leather garment that held her clothing together at the waist. She pressed the blade against the man's throat, teeth bared like a feral beast, eyes filled with malice. 

"Was it you?" she hissed. "The night of the last festival, was it you?!" 

"Stupid gaijin!" the man shouted. 

She struck him. Not across the face, but in the throat. A controlled punch that caused the man to splutter and gasp, but would not be fatal, this time. 

"Answer me," she said in a low voice. 

"Why?" grunted the man. "You intend to kill me either way." 

"How presumptuous of you." The blade shifted. A line of blood appeared on the pale throat. "Know that if you do cooperate, there's a chance you may live. What you should be aware of, is that if you don't, it is with certainty that you  _will_  die. So, in truth, it's actually in your best interest, not mine, that you answer. I already have a strong belief that it was you and your friend; I just want to hear a confession from you directly." 

He spat at her. The tip of the blade sank into his neck and Sesshomaru caught the acrid smell of his terror; he also noticed that the woman's had dissolved. 

"Sango never should have interfered," the man seethed. "It was not her place. She should have left you to us. You don't belong here. The sooner you figure that out, the better it will be for the village. Even the hanyou, Inuyasha, has more of a position among us than some useless gaijin not even from this world!"

It was a tumble of information to sift through and his attention lingered on the mention of his brother for hardly a breath before he focused on a few choice words. Not from this world? A curiosity he would sate later. Sesshomaru found himself taking a step forward, keen on the figure of the seemingly frozen woman peering down at her captive. The anger had drained from her face, leaving her expression remarkably blank. Even her eyes had softened, but were no less transfixed on the one beneath her, studying him with same intensity she'd shown when meeting the daiyoukai. Then, an inexplicable grin graced her lips.

"What are you compensating for, boy?" she asked, drawing the dagger out of his neck and letting it rest against his throat once more. She pushed the staff down harder until her captive was writhing in pain. "Do you feel so inadequate as a man that you have to prove yourself by attacking a defenseless woman with the help of a friend?"

"You call yourself defenseless?!"

"I was the first night. You pushed me to this; feel proud that you brought out the best in me."

Sesshomaru realized that, even she backhanded the man, she never had any inclination to take their lives. Was she going to turn the men over to the village for sentencing, then? There would be no need for such an interrogation if that was her intention. Perhaps she merely wanted to seek her own sense of justice and giving these two a harsh beating would suffice.

A groan suddenly broke from the prone figure on the ground, nearly forgotten in the verbal tirade of threats and confessions. Sesshomaru glanced at the still form; he could afford to. It was not his guard that needed to be maintained. The woman, however, made the grievous error of allowing herself to be distracted. She looked over at the noise, and that brief second was all that was needed. The man beneath her took the opportunity to seize her wrist and wrench it sharply, dragging a cry from her as the dagger was dislodged from her grip. He flung the woman off him, staff and all, and scrambled to his feet. The woman did the same, and immediately caught a hard blow across the face that knocked her right back down.

The man held both the staff and her dagger. He tossed the former away, favoring the blade that had left his neck a ruined mess of crimson, and bore down on the woman, dagger held high. Sesshomaru smelled her blood before he reached the edge of the clearing, but stopped himself short of jumping into the fray. The woman had rolled out of the man's reach at the last moment. A long cut was visible on a tender forearm as she sprung to her feet, the man turning and charging again. She jumped back, avoiding his wild, careless swings. The man had the rage of brute strength on his side. The woman could not overpower him, and she seemed to know this. Instead of barreling headlong into the fight, she danced out of his reach. Dodging, ducking, spinning. It looked like a crude game of cat and mouse, with the man's anger growing with every passing second, screaming at her to stop being a coward, to stand her ground and fight him.

Sesshomaru remained where he was. Simple it would be put a stop to this. A flick of the wrist, literally, and the man would be subdued. But he would not involve himself. This was the woman's fight; it would not be proper to intervene when she was attempting to defend her own honor. That was the only conclusion Sesshomaru could draw at this point. If she did not intend to kill or turn these men over for judgment, then she meant to end these repeated assaults on her own terms. That was...respectable.

And it soon became obvious that she did not need his help. Though she was not without skill, the instruction from the daemon slayer had not been enough. The woman left much wanting in ways of improvement. Yet this was a farmer she was fighting, not a battle-hardened warrior. As she wore him out with her cat and mouse antics, she managed to snatch up the staff. The man stumbled in his exhaustion, attempting to back out of range, but it was too late. He was treated with the same courtesy as his companion and the quick assault left him just as bloodied and unconscious. He dropped like a stone as the woman stooped to gather up her dagger. Straightening, she sheathed the blade with an air of bitter triumph, cheek marred, fingers dripping with blood.

Her head turned at a sudden noise. Sesshomaru was already aware of what caught her attention. People were coming. A certain tang of hanyou reached his nose at Inuyasha's approach, no doubt lured by the fresh scent of blood. Though concealing himself was a simple task, the daiyoukai toyed with the idea of departing. There would be time enough to speak with the woman later. Perhaps if the village blamed her for the incident that took place tonight, she would have no choice but to leave. Without protection, she would not survive for long. Could he use such an offer to bargain with? Yet there was a chance she would not be driven out. If he testified on her behalf, she would be in his debt. In the end, he decided he would remain, to witness the possible outcome, and use it to his advantage, whatever it might be.

Once more, he began to circle the clearing, feet moving soundlessly over the forest floor, as he searched for the best view while remaining out of sight.

Blue eyes swept over in his direction. 

Sesshomaru went still. 

Voices rang out and the woman turned away at the call of a foreign word that was repeated over and over.

"Lucidity!" 

"Where are you?"

"Lucidity?! Answer us!"

Sesshomaru slipped deeper into the forest, the wind tossing his hair back. The clearing slid in and out of sight until he found the perfect gap between the trees and saw the group burst into the clearing. Inuyasha, monk, daemon slayer, and priestess. They stared at the scene before them, the two bloodied men out cold, the gaijin standing between them, quiet and impassive. It was the daemon slayer who broke away first and hurried to the woman's side. 

"You're hurt," she said, taking hold of her arm. "Let's get you back to your home. Kagome, can you help?" 

"Hold up!" Inuyasha shouted as he flung out an arm in front of the priestess to keep her from leaving his side. "Just what the hell happened here?" 

"What does it look like?" snapped the daemon slayer. "Lucidity was attacked again." 

"Again?" echoed the monk, stepping forward. "This has happened before?" 

"Yes," his wife answered. "I found two men in the forest, trying to assault her, during the previous festival." 

Expressions of shock spread throughout the group.

"Why didn't you say anything?" came the whispered question from Kagome. 

"To what point and purpose?" the woman replied. "It was too dark. Neither Sango nor I saw their faces. But we know now." With the staff, she nudged the foot of the man whose neck she had cut. "This one admitted as much." 

"That's why you didn't attend tonight," the monk said. "Without knowing who they were, you were afraid they would make another attempt." 

"It's also why I started training her," said the daemon slayer.

"Shit," Inuyasha muttered. 

"We better let Kaede and the headman know about this," Kagome said. 

Inuyasha folded his arms. "Yeah. This isn't going to be pretty. I'll go ahead and take these two lumps back. Kagome, go with Sango." He moved forward, but immediately stopped and frowned at the woman. "What are you looking at?" 

Blue eyes were turned, once more, in Sesshomaru's direction. Her searching gaze, however, confirmed she could not see him. She peered back at Inuyasha and shook her head. This simple movement appeared to unsettle her. She wavered suddenly, face rapidly draining of color and staff slipping from her slackened grip. The daemon slayer managed to catch her before she collapsed. 

Kagome rushed forward. "You've lost a lot of blood; we need to get you back now." 

Together, the women left the clearing. The monk trailed after, carrying the staff along with his shakujo, while Inuyasha lingered long enough to load the unconscious humans onto his back and bound after his friends. 

Sesshomaru moved out into the open and took in the lingering scents. Blood, fear, revenge. A tangled web that served him no purpose, that he wanted nothing to do with. And yet his choice in the matter was stripped from him. Little room was left to doubt that he would regret becoming involved with this gaijin; she caused nothing but problems. Problems he would deal with if it ever became necessary. With great reluctance, he followed after this...Lucidity. 

* * *

The night had grown quiet. From the outskirts, Sesshomaru could hear that the celebrations had died away. A handful of shouts and laughter broke the silence now and then, revealing that not all had fallen into the embrace of sleep. He, himself, was settled outside of Lucidity's hut, in front of a fire pit that had not been lit for several days by the looks of it. The pit was further from the hut than was commonly found, but the daiyoukai had little difficulty in hearing the women's discussion. He listened to the murmur of their voices inside, as Lucidity had her wounds tended to and recounted what had happened. Not only this night, but in the previous encounter with the men, the story punctuated once or twice by the daemon slayer when she shared her memories of the matter, that it had been her youkai companion, Kirara, who was drawn by the noises coming from the forest. She described coming upon the scene of the men struggling with Lucidity, who, in spite of having little experience in self defense, had so far managed to keep them from forcing themselves onto her. 

"If we came any later, I don't believe she would have been as fortunate," the daemon slayer added. A soft grunt could be heard from Lucidity. There had yet to be any hint of tears or hysterics. She recalled her ordeal as if she had done so a hundred times before, enough that she'd become indifferent to the violent experience. 

"Do either of you know what will happen now?" Lucidity asked. 

"The evidence is damning," the daemon slayer was quick to say. "How are those bastards going to explain what they were doing out here while the whole village was at the festival? You'll be fine." 

"You honestly think the headman and everyone will believe my version?" 

"It's the truth!" exclaimed Kagome. "We won't let them do anything to you, I promise. Don't worry, okay? Here, drink this." 

Sesshomaru glanced at the entrance of the hut, doubting every word beyond Kagome's promise. Lucidity was an outsider; she would be ostracized, regardless if found at fault or not. The world was not a forgiving place. He listened for Lucidity's response, curious about her opinion of the matter, but none was forthcoming as the conversation died away.

Silence pervaded and did not leave. 

The night was beginning to wane. The scent of dawn was rising. A shift in temperature, the muted aromas that otherwise weakened in the absence of the sun. Sesshomaru lifted his head and closed his eyes as he dragged a fresh breath into his lungs and inhaled deeply until he could taste the summer on his tongue.

Each season brought with it a change in the air. Winter was crisp and the very wind crackled with its freezing caress, delicate in its touch. He favored that time of year, when the world was silent and slumbering, the humans more docile in their need to conserve energy during the cold months. Yet right before he went mad with boredom, spring would arrive and chase away the exhaustion the chill brought, revitalizing the earth and those who survived the harsh snows. Renewed energy and vigor meant new enemies, the chance to find a strong and worthy opponent, to conquer and achieve supreme conquest. Summer revealed the harshness of battle with its blistering heat that bloated corpses and rotted the ground with blood that had been shed, until autumn arrived and silenced the land with a promise of an unforgiving winter so that the cycle might begin again.

Every season held characteristics that the daiyoukai did and did not enjoy. Yet no matter the weather, there was one moment that he favored above all. Before the dawn, before there was the barest streak of light upon the horizon, when not an insect sounded, when not a creature stirred, the moment when the nocturnal beings went to rest and those active during the day had yet to awaken. A moment suspended in tranquility when there was nothing and no one, save the daiyoukai, counting each beat of his heart, tasting each breath of air that he drew in, aware of himself as he was in no other setting, from the tips of his claws to each strand of hair, down to the core of his being, aware of the spark of life that made him as he was, as no other could be. 

And then the moment ended.

Footsteps sounded. Someone gasped. The daiyoukai opened his eyes and glanced over. The priestess and daemon slayer stood in the doorway of the hut, gazing down at him, mouths open at the sight.

"Sesshomaru!" Kagome exclaimed. "What are you doing here?"

"I require an audience with the gaijin," he replied.

The women shared a brief glance with one another, as though to convey a muted conversation without his knowledge.

"What for?" asked the daemon slayer.

Sesshomaru ignored her. "Is she awake?"

Kagome shook her head. "I gave her some medicine for the pain and to help her rest. She won't be awake for several hours. You can come back then."

"That won't be necessary," he said. "I will be staying here until I speak with the gaijin."

"Her name is Lucidity!" came the sharp reprimand from the daemon slayer. "And what exactly do you want with her, Sesshomaru?"

Sharp, golden eyes fixed on the woman, who appeared anxious, but did not back down.

"You are protective of her," Sesshomaru observed.

"She's our friend," said Kagome.

The daemon slayer took a step forward. "And we don't want anyone hurting her."

 "I have no intentions of harming your friend; I am not so barbaric as the men of your village."

"You...you know?" came the stunned question from Kagome.

"I am aware of what has happened."

His gaze swept over the two women before he looked away, arms sliding into opposite sleeves of his haori. "No harm will come to the gaijin while I am present."

There was a moment of silence before Kagome spoke. "It's okay, Sango. Sesshomaru is fine here; he won't let anything happen. And we need to get back."

"Fine," muttered her companion, then added, "Keep Lucidity safe, Sesshomaru, you hear?"

Sesshomaru didn't reply, only frowned when Kagome said, "He will. But...there's no guarantee anyone will keep him safe from Lucidity when she first wakes up."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter. Getting the flow and energy of a fight scene is difficult sometimes for me, especially when trying to explain aspects of the story and characters. I hope the writing doesn't feel like it jumps around too much. Any feedback is appreciated. Hope you all are enjoying everything so far!


	5. Chapter 5

Her arm hurt. Her head hurt. Hell, everything hurt. A small price to pay to know that she was alive.

Lucidity awoke alone in her hut, vaguely recalling that Kagome and Sango mentioned returning to their husbands. The remnants of Kagome's medicine made it feel as if she was lugging about a bag of stones, when in reality it was only her body. Rising in the morning was already a difficult chore. Now she stumbled about as if she had partook heavily in the festival all along, rather than having spent the evening ensuring that no man ever laid a hand on her again. Whatever the consequences, it was worth knowing she would never have to be afraid of another attack from a villager. 

There was one aspect she had not considered as a result of last night, however, and he was sitting outside. She spotted him the moment she pushed the hanging aside and leaned against the doorway on the arm that wasn't bandaged up. She blinked through the disheveled nightmare that was her hair and stared at the daiyoukai, sitting so serenely before the unlit hearth as though it was his own. His eyes slid over to Lucidity, appraising her no doubt rumpled appearance of clothes that had been slept in and bruises that marred her face, if the ever present ache in her jaw was anything to go by. 

Thoughts and questions tumbled through her mind. There was a whole assortment of things she wanted to ask him, or just say to him. "Get the fuck out!" was among them, but she did not have the energy for that. In the end, she leveled him with a look that clearly expressed how displeased she was at not being left alone, let out a grunt, and retreated to the other side of the hut to splash some cool water onto her face. She had half a mind to dunk her whole head in, but dismissed the idea at once; in her condition, she was liable to fall right into the creak. So, instead, she opted for rubbing the last of the sleep from her eyes and rinsing her mouth out, before disappearing back inside to finish her usual morning routine, though it was nearly noon judging by the sun. 

The fire pit outside had been dug and lined with rocks by her not long after moving into the hut. There was just something about having a fire constantly going inside, or even near, a small home constructed of wood that made her uneasy. Today, however, she had no interest in sitting all nice and cozy with someone who was all but forcing his company onto her. So, she rolled up the hanging of the doorway to let in the air and began preparing her morning tea, with willow bark for the pain, at the rarely used hearth inside. As water started to heat beneath a newly lit fire, she dragged a comb through the tangles of blonde hair, simply going through the motions, not allowing herself to truly dwell on the previous evening or what was to follow. 

Until Sesshomaru approached. 

All this while, he hadn't moved from the spot she found him in, probably going on an hour now. And who knew how long he'd been there before she woke. Now, his boots echoed dully on the ground and then upon the wood of the raised porch as he came up to the doorway, standing in the shadows of the small awning. His being here brought everything into sharp focus and she was not happy about it in the least.

"No longer sneaking around, I see," was her greeting, as she gathered up several locks to work out the snares. 

"You were aware of my presence." 

Lucidity let out a derisive snort at the statement. "Your presence is like a scream. I don't think 'aware' quite covers it." 

"Not even Inuyasha knew I was there, and tainted though his blood is, he is still half youkai with abilities beyond that of common mortals. The monk and priestess, too, can sense what most are blind to. How is it that you are capable of sensing what they cannot?" 

The comb paused, half buried in her hair. Shit, she thought. Was that true? She'd figured everyone else was just preoccupied with the scene and realizing the potential consequences, too distracted to bother with questioning the daiyoukai. It had been a bit confusing, but the blood loss had started to get to her at that point and the world, in general, hadn't made sense. Finally, she glanced up at Sesshomaru and shrugged. "No idea." 

His lips thinned and there was the slightest incline of his brow. 

She flipped her hair over one shoulder and began taming the other side of the heavy mass. "What do you want anyway? I doubt it has anything to do with last night. Though why you were there to begin with, I don't know." 

"I was observing." 

"Gee, I hope it was entertaining." 

"Little more than watching children fight." 

Lucidity tossed the comb aside. "Good to know," she replied without inflection as she removed the steaming water from the fire and added the tea leaves to steep. (Gods, what she wouldn't give for a damn latte.)

"You would have perished against a true warrior." 

It was as if he was determined to point out the flaws of everyone around him. Or was he warning her? Warning her not to fight someone of greater skill until she improved? She peered up at him as he folded his arms inside his sleeves, reminding her strongly of his younger brother. Well, whatever the reason, it was pointless telling her the obvious.

"I know," she said.

He blinked, but did not respond. Not even a ripple of facial expression. How was it that Rin became so attached to this youkai lord? He was about as warm and fuzzy as a porcupine. And those eyes of his, enough to freeze blood in the veins. Honestly, it was like tempting Death, maintaining eye contact with him for too long. She stirred the tea leaves as an excuse to look away.

"Why are you here?" she asked.

Silence.

She drained the tea into a pot and served herself a cup. "Either answer or leave, Sesshomaru. I don't have the energy to deal with guessing games."

"Kaidame," came the deep rumble above her.

The fog that was her mind had yet to clear. And as there was a bit more to deal with today than most mornings, she gazed at Sesshomaru for a long moment, not fully comprehending what on earth would make him say that name; she even forgot who Kaidame was for a second as she tried to understand.

Sesshomaru frowned at her blank stare. "You spoke his name while sitting alone in the forest. Why?"

Muddling through her adrenaline-induced-crippled-by-blood-loss memories, Lucidity finally recalled, albeit dimly, what he was referring to. "Oh," she muttered. "That.... I was trying to make sure I remembered the name, and that I was saying it right. Kaidame, yes. Myoga told me about him." 

"For what purpose?" 

Lucidity took a long drink and leaned back, peering up at the youkai lord. "Why do you care?" She wasn't trying to be obnoxious, not just yet. Mostly curious for now. 

"Kaidame is the one who sent me to search for a translator here. The mere fact that you spoke his name lends credence to the belief that he could be referring to no one else but you." 

Now _that_ had her attention. Suddenly more fully alert, Lucidity clutched the cup tightly in both hands, lowering it to her lap. "He sent you here, for me?" she repeated. 

"The heart of my territory, is where he advised to search. This village resides not far from the center of the Western lands. I have no doubts you are the one he spoke of." 

Lucidity shook her head in disbelief. But she did not entirely dismiss what she was hearing. "The heart of your territory? Are you sure he meant that in literal terms and and not figurative, not perhaps...? Huh.... [Shit,]" she added in her own language as a sudden understanding struck her, watching as Sesshomaru fixed her with a hard frown. She offered him a bitter smile in return. "You sure he didn't mean Rin? 'The heart of your territory.' Rin was with me when we first met, after all." Judging by the way those golden eyes widened, even if only a fraction, she knew this thought hadn't occurred to him. She poured herself another cup and brought it up to her lips. "[Fuck the Fates,]" she muttered, then drank deep. 

"What reason did the flea have to tell you about Kaidame?"

With another stab of comprehension, Lucidity realized that Myoga had returned the same day as Sesshomaru, carrying with him news that led to this inconceivable conversation that would not have happened otherwise. Just...what the hell was going on?! Her heartbeat picked up speed as she thought about the Seer, about everything that had led to this point, and simply could not believe any of it was a coincidence. Something was playing them here. Glancing up at Sesshomaru, she wondered if he'd come to the same conclusions. If he had, it didn't show. He was watching her, quiet, expectant, and she sighed before lowering the cup and proceeding to recount the brief meeting with Myoga.

"...and I'm told, Kaidame won't help unless I'm the one he makes a deal with. Whatever is happening, he doesn't seem to care. Well, neither do I," Lucidity added. "I just want to go home. If this helps me, so be it; I'll go see the crazy, old cod." 

Sesshomaru had listened in silence, which really wasn't a surprise. Silence appeared to be his default. Stoic, too, with the way he surveyed everything and everyone around him. He was worse than she was, giving her a taste of the unease she knew she inadvertently caused people sometimes. 

"Kaidame is manipulating us," were the first words from the daiyoukai. 

The corners of her mouth quirked. "So it seems. Or something is pulling his strings as well," she replied.

"Perhaps."

At least they could agree on something, such as this whole matter being completely bullshit. Lucidity didn't understand, didn't trust whatever cosmic force it was that had put her in Sesshomaru's path, because that was looking more and more like the case. She peered down at the cup and felt the uncomfortable prickle of the daiyoukai's gaze on her. 

"You came here to ask for my help again, didn't you?" she asked, though well knew the answer at this point. 

A heartbeat passed between them.

"Yes," came the reply. 

"And why would I do that?" 

"It would be in your best interest." 

She lifted her head, eyes narrowed. Was that a threat?

"It is impossible for humans to reach Kaidame on foot," Sesshomaru continued. "You will require the aid of a youkai." 

A long breath escaped her that barely hid the exasperated laugh. "Of course," she said. "Nothing is ever easy. So, you help me get to Kaidame and I work out what you need translating. Is that the idea?" 

"Yes." 

She shook her head and immediately caught a glimpse of the hand clenching into a fist at Sesshomaru's side, barely hidden by the long sleeve of his haori, felt the crackle of rising energy. "I'm not refusing," she was quick to say and air relaxed. "It's just...too early in the morning for all this. And with what happened last night, I can't up and leave without causing more trouble for myself; I'll never be welcomed back." And she wasn't ready to completely abandon the village, either. She wasn't sure what would come of a trip to some half-mad Seer, if he would have a way home for her or not. If he didn't, she needed a place she could seek refuge in. The village wasn't her home. She would never fit in here, but it would have to do; she didn't have much of a choice, after all. 

"You have three days," Sesshomaru stated. 

She blinked at him, coming out of her reverie. "What?" 

"I will be leaving in three days," he said. "You have until then to reach a decision." 

Without another word, he turned and walked away. Lucidity was left staring through the open doorway, cold tea clutched in her hands, and wondering how on earth this little life she'd carved for herself in the feudal era had managed to be turned on its head. Was she seriously contemplating going on a journey with a daemon? On...on what could be considered a damn quest? Maybe she'd been struck upside the head and not in the face last night and this was all some drug-induced dream. Curiously, she ran a hand through her hair, but could feel no lumps. Nope, not a dream. Simply cold, hard reality, that just so happened to include daemons and time travel.

* * *

"You're lying!"

Lucidity shook her head.

"Yes, you are. It's not possible."

"Trust me, it is," Lucidity replied.

"It's true, Inuyasha," Sango insisted. "He was there."

"Yeah," said Kagome. "He was waiting for us outside of Lucidity's hut. None of us have talked to him, but he already knew about the attack."

The stubborn hanyou folded his arms. "I'm not saying it isn't possible for Sesshomaru to hide himself from me. I'm saying it's impossible for her," he pointed at Lucidity, "to know he's there when I don't."

Lucidity rolled her eyes. She was sitting outside of Kagome's hut, next to the priestess on her elevated porch, with everyone else milling around, including the children and even Kohaku, who visited Sango for every festival. She had just finished telling them about the conversation she'd had with Sesshomaru a few hours ago, while Kagome inspected the cut on her arm. Most of her audience was astounded at the circumstances surrounding the daiyoukai and gaijin, or that Sesshomaru personally requested that a human travel with him. Inuyasha, however, was stuck on one particular detail.

"Maybe he did not know he had to take extra measures to conceal himself from Lucidity," Miroku offered with the air of someone supplicating for reason. "His guard could have been down when he first entered the forest. Other than us, no one is aware that she has spiritual powers."

Lucidity sighed. "How many times do I have to tell you that isn't true?"

Miroku smiled, and it was the sort of smile that conveyed the patient understanding when expecting a child to learn an important lesson. "You may call it what you will, Lucidity, but you have an awareness of the world around you that is natural. It helps you sense the energy of youkai, even humans, and lends skill to your reactions and instincts."

Lucidity took another deep breath, but didn't say anything further, not even when Kagome murmured her agreement. There was no point in arguing with Miroku. Not to mention that if she tried to explain, it meant going into far more detail about her upbringing than she cared to talk about. So, she let the monk believe what he would, as he did with her; he was too convinced of his own conclusions to consider an alternative, anyway.

"Sesshomaru doesn't know much about her, so I suppose it's feasible," said Inuyasha, continuing his part of the conversation as if nothing had interrupted it. "I guess he wouldn't have thought to hide from her, only us when he knew we were coming."

"But wasn't his scent all over the place?" asked Shippo from where he sat at Kagome's feet. "How could you not notice that?"

"Of course I noticed!" Inuyasha snapped. "But that was the direction he went when he left the village; I was expecting his scent to be there. The bastard must have stayed upwind of me so I wouldn't pick up on how close he was. Dammit!"

Apparently personally offended by his big brother deceiving him, Inuyasha scowled and stalked away from the group to stand a few yards away, arms folded and ears twitching.

While the hanyou pouted, a spec hopped from the ground and onto Lucidity's knee. "Sesshomaru must be in dire straits to ask for your help," Myoga said to her. "I find it hard to believe that it's a mere coi-"

Lucidity held up her free hand, as Kagome had barely finished flushing out her wound and was starting to apply a newly mixed ointment. "I know," she said. "Trust me, I've given it a lot of thought."

"I see. Then you know he is telling that truth, that Kaidame lives where it is not easily accessible to humans?"

"Sesshomaru doesn't strike me as the type who lies," Lucidity replied, keeping her arm elevated as Kagome began to wrap the wound.

"No, he isn't," said the flea. "He is many things that are less than savory, but a liar is not among them. Now, I had considered asking for Kirara's assistance in taking you to Kaidame, with me guiding her and Inuyasha for further protection, but-"

"I'm not taking anyone anywhere!" shouted the hanyou as he stormed back over. "I'm not getting mixed up in any of this, you hear?"

Kagome looked up from tying bandages into place. "Inuyasha," she chided. "We have to help-"

"We don't have to do a damn thing!" he interrupted. "We don't owe her our help. Let Sesshomaru take her. It will be easier for everyone. We have responsibilities to the village, but he doesn't, and neither does Lucidity."

Quietly, and with good reason, Sango and Miroku slipped over to where their daughters were playing with rocks on the ground, Sango carrying their infant son, while Shippo darted off to sit by Kohaku, who was sharpening the blade of his kusarigama nearby. Myoga had disappeared, as well. Lucidity really couldn't blame them. Hell, she would have done the same if possible, but she was currently trapped with Inuyasha on one side and his now red-faced wife on the other.

Kagome was on her feet, hands clenched at her sides. "How can you say that, Inuyasha?" she demanded. "Lucidity is part of the village. She needs our help like everyone else."

"I'm not leaving you here alone to go off and babysit!"

"Then I'll go with her if it's so beneath you!"

"You're not going anywhere; it's too dangerous to be on your own."

"It will be no different for Lucidity."

"Kagome, you're not-"

"STOP!"

Both Inuyasha and Kagome froze, mouths open in preparation of a full on screaming match. Lucidity, literally caught in the middle, rubbed a knuckle against an ear. "[Fucking hell], you're making me go deaf," she grumbled, glancing between the two. Eventually, she settled on the priestess. "Kagome...Inuyasha is right."

There was a collective intake of noise around the group, gasps and murmurs of disbelief. Lucidity peered around to see all faces turned towards her; even Inuyasha was stunned.

"I-I am?" he asked.

"Yes," Lucidity said. "You and Kagome have your duties to the village. Sesshomaru and I can leave freely whenever we want. It makes more sense for him to escort me."

Kagome sat back down beside her. "Are you sure?" she asked, expression earnest.

"It's all right; I can handle Sesshomaru. And I don't want to come between you and Inuyasha more than I already have."

"But you haven't," Kagome insisted, but there was a snort from Inuyasha. She glared at him, but looked back at Lucidity. "You're our friend. We care about you. It doesn't matter what other people think; Inuyasha knows that better than anyone. You shouldn't feel like you're coming between us. We can take you to Kaidame. It's okay."

"Let it go, Kagome," Inuyasha growled. "She's made up her mind. She knows she doesn't belong here. No matter what you say, that fact isn't going to change."

Lucidity, already a bit dazed and warmed by Kagome's passionate declaration of friendship, complete with far more emotion than Lucidity herself could ever conjure, felt a sharp pang at Inuyasha's words and clenched her teeth. Two sides of the same coin, this couple was. Kagome with her hopeful outlook and kind sincerity, and Inuyasha with his harsh truth and blunt words. Lucidity dearly wanted to believe Kagome, but she was more inclined to agree with the hanyou, who was brash, but not wrong. Not in the least. Lucidity did not belong, just as her attacker had proclaimed last night, just as Inuyasha did the same now.

Kagome must have noticed the effect of her husband's words, for she slowly rose to her feet, head down, and fists trembling at her sides. "In-u-ya-sha," she bit out, and the hanyou's stubborn stance immediately crumpled as he stepped back, quailing under the aura of pure, unadulterated rage filling the air.

"No, wait," he began.

"OSUWARI!"

"GAH!"

Lucidity had to admit, as she jerked her legs out of the way, that it was damn satisfying to see the mutt kiss the ground, especially right at her feet.

"You can be such a jerk, Inuyasha!" Kagome shouted. "Don't you have any consideration? I believed you of all people would know what it's like to be an outsider, to not be trusted just because you're different. But you turn around and do the same thing to Lucidity that people have done to you your entire life. I can't believe you! I-"

"Kagome."

It was Sango who spoke as she and Miroku, Shippo and Kohaku, suddenly joined them. Lucidity already knew what had drawn their attention and was on her feet at once at the sight of a small cluster of people coming their way up the path. Kagome, whose back was to them, turned. Two broke away from the group, an elderly woman and a robust man in his forties with salt and pepper hair.

"Kaede-sama!" Kagome said. "Haru-san!"

Lucidity stepped over the twitching figure of the hanyou to stand beside Sango. She shared a quick glance with her as the old priestess and headman joined them. There was a sound of shifting dirt as the effects of the rosary beads wore off and Inuyasha staggered upright, brushing dirt and rocks out of his hair.

"And what grave offense have you committed today, Inuyasha?" Kaede asked with a hint of a smile in her voice.

"Hmph!" Inuyasha folded his arms, his cheeks stained pink, and glared at her, then at the elders who lingered in the background. "Have you guys already made a decision? That was quick."

Lucidity shifted and immediately felt the pressure of Sango's hand on her arm, a mute, reassuring grip.

"No," Haru answered, his gaze drifting to each in turn. "We are here to collect Lucidity and Sango. Their accounts of these unfortunate events must be heard before any judgment can be passed."

Heart thudding in her ears, Lucidity felt the cold rush of dread spread throughout her body, making her toes and fingers grow numb. "It's all right," she heard Sango whisper, and then felt a tug on her arm as she was urged forward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise not much longer until Sesshy and Co. will be on their way. Chapter 6 is almost done, as well, and will be posted soon, probably within the next couple of days if I have the time to finish it. 
> 
> QMC, I hope this chapter helps give a sufficient explanation about what we talked about in chapter 4. 
> 
> As always, hope you all enjoyed and thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

There was nothing that could be done, nothing that could put it back together. No chance of saving it. No hope of mending such a broken thing. Lucidity gazed dejectedly at Rin and shook her head, letting the girl know that it was a lost cause. Rin heaved a sigh and looked down.

"Okay," she said, and dropped the torn paper into the bucket of other rejected pieces. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean to ruin it."

"It's fine, Rin," Lucidity said. "It can be mixed in with the next batch. Just be more careful. I promised Kaede I'd have a new journal for her."

Rin nodded and went back to stacking and counting the sheets of paper that were ready to be assembled. Lucidity sat next to her and was putting the finishing touches on another journal.

The whole art of making her own paper and books had been a hobby of hers before she came here. The process was not too different than it was back home. She simply had less access to materials and had to be more inventive with the machine that made the pulp. One of the men from the village had help her set up the rotary device, along with the mold for the paper made out of fishing net and wood. In exchange, she made him a journal of his own, where he recorded ideas for other inventions.

Her hobby was actually a bit profitable. Not much, but enough to get by in this quiet life. Enough villagers knew how to read and write and wanted an easier way to record day-to-day activities, create inventories, etc., or were more inclined to be artistically creative and requested sketchbooks. They were willing to trade with Lucidity, like the inventor had. She was given food, dishes, blankets, and so on. Not always the best quality, but it was how she managed to gather most of the belongings in her hut. She still helped the village in other ways, with planting and harvesting, building new huts, and whatever other miscellaneous activities that needed the aid of the community. But it was the journals that brought in a little extra. Made from the fiber of plants or scraps of cotton no one wanted, Lucidity bound anywhere from fifty to over a hundred pages together, depending on what the person needed it for, and glued them to a strip of cotton that wrapped around one end lengthwise. (The glue she also made herself, from a concoction of boiled hooves.) Once the pages were ready, she placed them between two planks of thin, pliable wood of the same size, then glued on a cover of leather or cotton, that held everything together.

Suffice it to say, this was the only village in the entire countryside that possessed such a thing. The villagers said they found it easier to flip pages than open scroll after scroll to look for information. Plus the books were easier to stack and store, took up less room than a pile of scrolls. Whatever the reason, Lucidity was glad that she was able to make the journals at all. It had been for herself at first, until word spread. She only wanted a sense of familiarity and writing in journals of her own creation was about as close to home as she could manage.

Usually she worked on these projects alone. Lately, however, she had Rin at her side. The girl was always coming around when she had the chance, long before the day when Lucidity had first met the infamous Sesshomaru she constantly heard about. One of the few people Lucidity allowed into her hut, Rin made herself at home whenever she visited. When asked why she enjoyed the company of a gaijin so much, she could only shrug. "You remind me of Sesshomaru," she had said. "He's strange, too."

Now that Lucidity had actually met the daiyoukai, she grudgingly admitted that Rin had poor taste in people, herself included. She glanced at the girl, who was humming to herself and gluing the cotton strip onto the pages as she'd been shown. In the end, Lucidity also admitted that she enjoyed the company, even if it meant enduring more than she was accustomed to right then. Sesshomaru and Jaken were milling about, along with the two-headed dragon, Ah-Un. It had been a rough shock, meeting the dragon, which she'd already been told about. But hearing tales and seeing it for herself were two entirely different experiences, and she still eyed the beast warily as it grazed. Sesshomaru was currently resting in the shade of a tree next to the hut, his eyes closed, while Jaken was stirring a fire in the pit outside, apparently out of boredom. He kept sighing and staring into the flames, sometimes looking over at Rin and Lucidity as they worked, but doing little else, until....

"How hard is it for humans to make a decision?" he snapped out of the blue, throwing the charred stick he'd been using into the flames. "It's been over a day and they still haven't reached a verdict!"

Lucidity glanced up at the imp to find him glaring at her as if she should know the answer and was trying to keep it from them. "Your guess is as good as mine," she said.

"Well, weren't you there?" he demanded, voice laced with condescension. "You should be aware of their thoughts on your crime."

Lucidity immediately recalled the nerve-wracking time spent alone with the group of elders, Kaede, and the headman, Haru. She and Sango had had to give their statements separately, the same as any modern day investigation. Lucidity had stuck to the truth. She didn't embellish, change details, or omit any relevant information. The entire time, the sea of stern, impassive faces swam in front of her. There were moments when glances were exchanged or she was interrupted and asked a question. Never was she able to determine if the others believed her or not. They simply listened and dismissed her, saying she would be informed when they had determined who was speaking the truth, or rather who was easier to believe.

Her stomach tightened and filled a faint nausea. "I don't know," she told Jaken, her voice soft, steady, as she set aside the completed journal and took the glued pages that Rin offered. "It doesn't matter, though."

"What do you mean?" Rin asked anxiously.

"I'll be leaving the village, no matter what happens," Lucidity replied, aligning the paper and wood together on top of a stretch of leather. "Their decision will only determine if I will be gone temporarily or indefinitely."

Rin made a small noise of displeasure, but it was Jaken who spoke. "You don't exactly sound worried," he said. "Why are you making us wait if you don't care about their decision?"

"I do care, I am worried," Lucidity countered, eyes still on her work. "But there's no point in stressing over something I have no control of. Rin, hold this," she added, and the girl kept the leather taut while Lucidity picked up the bowl of glue and applied it with a brush between the wood and leather. With Rin's help, they were able to wrap the second journal without any trouble. Lucidity handed both newly made journals to Rin. "You can put these under the stone slabs until the glue dries." Smiling brightly, Rin nodded and hurried off to complete the task. Lucidity peered back at Jaken and saw that he was still glowering at her. "What?"

"You smell of lies, human," Jaken grumbled.

She rolled her eyes and began collecting her crafting tools. "Are you sure you're not smelling yourself? When was the last time you bathed?"

Rin came running back, just as Jaken started to blustered, cursing every other word and pointing a dramatic finger at Lucidity. "What do you know, you stupid woman?! You force your unwanted presence onto this village. What did you expect would happen? Serves you right for manipulating everyone around you. I told Sesshomaru-sama he would be better off finding someone more trustworthy. Why do you even need the help of a Seer to get back home? All you need to do is board a ship and let it carry you back to whatever hole you crawled out of-OUCH!"

It was with vindictive pleasure that she watched Jaken topple over, clutching his forehead, where she had lobbed a stone at him. Smiling to herself, she rose to her feet, hands full, while Jaken rolled around in pain. Rin hurried over and crouched beside him.

"Are you all right, Jaken-sama?" she asked, reaching out.

Jaken turned his back on her and curled up. "Leave me alone, Rin!"

Rin drew her hand back, letting it rest on her knee, a pouting frown forming on her face.

Lucidity shook her head and made her way back to the hut.

"That was very mean to say," she heard Rin murmur. "It's not Lucidity's fault that she's here. She's like Kagome; she's not from this time."

Lucidity froze in the doorway, long enough to hang her head and sigh, before disappearing inside. Dammit to hell, not this again. While putting away her tools, she listened to the conversation outside.

"We've heard those rumors before," Jaken said. "You can't expect us to believe such outlandish claims."

"It's true!" Rin insisted. "I'll show you. She brought stuff with her!"

And the next thing Lucidity realized, Rin was in the hut, digging through the odd bits here and there of Lucidity's belongings.

"Rin," Lucidity said, "I've told you before not to tell people."

"I know, but...that was so mean of Jaken-sama," she replied without looking up. "And I don't like lying. I already did once when Sesshomaru-sama asked and I felt horrible. Besides, you need to tell them the truth anyway, right?" 

"Eventually, yes, but that isn't for you to decide and-hey, wait, what do you think you're doing?!" Lucidity demanded, but the girl was in too much of an excitable rush to listen. From underneath an old, tattered blanket that was hardly ever looked at, let alone touched, she'd extracted a thick, rectangular object made of faux leather and was already out the door before Lucidity was on her feet. "Rin! It probably doesn't even work anymore. Rin? Bring that back!" She didn't think the girl would find it so fast, dammit!

By the time she made it outside, Rin had opened the faux leather cover to reveal the black screen of a tablet. Jaken stood in front of her, staring, mouth slightly parted. Then his jaw dropped when the girl found the power button and the screen lit up, displaying the logo of a fruit with a bite taken out of it. Lucidity resisted the urge to put a hand over her face and groan. Instead, she glanced over at a movement and saw Sesshomaru was awake, if he'd even been asleep to begin with. His eyes were open and he was watching as Rin handed the tablet to Jaken, whose expression hadn't changed.

"What...what is it? Is it magic? It looks like a painting that's been brought to life," he said.

"Lucidity said it's just like the books she makes, but more complicated," Rin explained, hands behind her back as she rocked on her feet. "She showed us when she first got here, but said it would die eventually. Why isn't it dead, yet?" the girl asked, looking over at Lucidity.

"It hasn't been use or powered on in months," she answered with a sigh.

"Kami, it moved!" Jaken cried out, jerking his hand away from the screen's surface. "I touched it and it moved! It's alive!"

"No, it isn't," Rin said and came to stand beside him. "Look." She started to poke the screen. Behind her, Sesshomaru stood and began walking towards them. And then music blared from the tiny speakers of the tablet, shattering the peaceful, predictable sounds of nature; it absolutely did not belong. Jaken and Rin let out similar shrieks of fright, dropping the tablet and scrambling away, and even Sesshomaru paused.

"Kill it! Kill it!" Jaken shouted, darting behind Sesshomaru. Rin was quick to join him.

"Why is it so angry?!" the girl asked tearfully, clinging to the daiyoukai's clothes.

Lucidity pursed her lips together. Actually, she really had to bite down. She tried. She tried so hard, so damn hard! But she might as well have been holding back a flood of water with nothing more than a paper fan. The sound burst from her and there was nothing she could do to stop it. Doubled over, arms around her stomach, the peals of laughter brought tears to her eyes and aches to her body. She gasped and wheezed, unable to rein it in, as though she was a child without a sense of control. And when she saw the dumbstruck expression on Jaken's face and the sneer on Sesshomaru's lips when he stooped to pick up the tablet, she died all over again. The daiyoukai, imp, and human girl were all staring, but she didn't care, even as she dropped to her knees, finding it all so ridiculously beyond hilarious, and also a bit difficult to breathe.

"Don't-don't you dare," she managed to gasp out, "don't-break it. Let-me...let me see...." More laughter. She couldn't contain it. But finally, finally! she took in a deep breath and wiped the tears from her eyes. "Oh gods," she breathed, "that was priceless. [Fuck!]"

"If you do not wish this item destroyed, you will make it desist," Sesshomaru said, his tone and expression dark as he held out the tablet.

Lucidity pushed herself to her feet and, still grinning, took it from him. She tapped the pause button and Queen's "Somebody to Love" was cut short. She supposed the drums and guitar solos were too much for the delicate ears of this age. She pressed the button to bring up the home screen and handed it back to Rin, who had moved out from behind Sesshomaru.

"Serves you right for taking without ask," she said, and the girl blushed. "Just don't touch that symbol again." She indicated the music icon.

"Yes, Lucidity, I'm sorry," said Rin with a little bow.

"What...what was that?" Jaken asked, taking tentative steps towards Rin to watch her fiddle with the tablet again.

Lucidity did her best not to snicker. "Music," she told him.

Jaken bristled. "That is NOT music. That is murder on the ears!"

Lucidity grinned. "In five hundred years, that will be some of the most popular music in the world."

Jaken stared. Rin, apparently uninterested in tales of the future, was busy tapping away on the screen. Lucidity could tell, from the motions of her hand, that the girl had figured out how to swipe.

"Five hundred years," Sesshomaru repeated. "That is where you are from?"

She nodded.

"How did you come to be here?"

"Heh, wish I knew," she said, running a hand through her hair. Her gaze lingered on Rin and Jaken for a moment, before she peered over at Sesshomaru. "I was visiting a shrine, Kagome's family shrine as it turned out. The tree your brother was pinned to, Goshinboku, was there. Its aura is...well, very distracting. And when I went to look at it, it...reacted, I suppose? Honestly, I don't know what happened." She shook her head, as though that would help clear out unwanted memories.

Jaken looked up. "What do you remember?" 

"A strong pulse of energy, blinding light," Lucidity said, wondering and doubting that he or Sesshomaru could explain what that meant. "Next thing I know, it's night, it's raining, and I'm surrounded by a bunch of villagers with weapons drawn on me. They thought I was some youkai or bad spirit, at least until Kagome showed up."

"She knew you were from her time?" asked Jaken.

Lucidity nodded. "The clothes I was wearing were a bit of a giveaway. That and the things I was carrying in my bag, including that." She gestured towards the tablet. "She had to shout herself hoarse at a few, promised that she would put beads of subjugation on all of them if they didn't listen." A smile touched her lips at the memory, despite how she'd been scared stiff and hadn't understood what was going at the time.

"Oh!" Rin suddenly gasped. "Lucidity, is this you?!" The girl flipped the tablet around and held it up. "Who is that with you?" 

Lucidity glanced down. All humor and feeling drained away. Hell, she didn't even feel connected to her own body. Ears ringing. Mind spinning. The whole nine yards. The shock was pure and absolute. She could not keep herself from reacting to this anymore than the music. How could she? She wasn't expecting this, not at all. Of course, she remembered downloading the photos now. But, with the last few months, she'd nearly forgotten about the tablet entirely, not to mention what was on it. She never imagined, not even for a moment, that she would ever see that face again, whether in life or in a goddamn picture.

"L-Lucidity?" came Rin's soft, tentative voice.

The woman swallowed, stealing herself, her throat suddenly swollen and aching. She barely recalled that Rin was expecting an answer.

"Yeah," she murmured, little more than a grunt really. She cleared her throat and took a deep breath before looking at the girl. "Yeah, that's me. And that's...." 

Rin was still holding the tablet in both hands, but she'd lowered it, staring up at Lucidity, concerned etched all over her face as words failed the woman. Jaken, too, was watching, while Sesshomaru remained as impassive and stoic as ever. Lucidity looked back at the photo and felt the familiar ache, deep and raw; it was as much a part of her as her own skin, no different than learning how to breathe around a sharp pain in the chest after a long run, but one that would never fade, not completely. She stared at the man's face, frozen in the moment, smiling with her, his arm around her shoulders. He was a head taller, a little plump, with a thick beard that was starting to gray and hair long enough to curl around his ears. His eyes were crinkled with laugh lines, but, really, he hadn't been that old; he'd been almost too young when she was born.

Without a word, she stepped forward, took the tablet from Rin, and shut it off. "I think you've made your point," she said to the girl. "That's enough." She turned and walked back into the hut, to stash the tablet somewhere it wasn't so easily discovered. But even as she began moving things around to find a hiding place, she could hear the echo of voices outside.

"What a strange contraption," said Jaken. "It must be true, then; she's from another time. I wonder who that man was, though."

"I...I think it was her father," said Rin.

Inside the hut, Lucidity smothered a sob behind her hand.

* * *

The afternoon with Rin, Sesshomaru, and Jaken had drawn to an abrupt and unpleasant close. The three had left, with only the girl giving any parting words, and Lucidity had not ventured out the rest of the day, too overwhelmed with the grief she believed she had left behind, in another country, in another time. It was well after dark before she fell asleep and dreams had plagued her all night long, dreams that were half formed of ideas and fears of the waking hours, memories and desires and the dead coming back. And when she awoke, the details of the dreams slipped away, leaving behind only a strong sensation of loss with no solace to be found.

It was not the best start to the day, but there were improvements, silver linings and all. Things weren't all bad. Such as when she found Miroku and Kagome in deep conversation with Sango just a few minutes ago after arriving for a bit of morning training with the daemon slayer. Training, however, was forgotten when Kagome, who'd been tasked by Kaede to do so, delivered some unexpected, but no less welcomed news. 

The counsel had found Lucidity innocent. By default. The men had admitted to their crimes and departed the village in permanent exile.

"I can't believe it," Kagome said. 

"I was there and neither can I," replied Sango. 

"It's a relief, to be honest," said Miroku. "There are too many outside forces that threaten us; we don't need any danger caused by our own people." 

"I'm still at fault, as far as most are concerned," Lucidity said. 

Her three companions gaped at her. She folded her arms, almost defiant. 

"How can you say you were at fault?" Kagome asked. "Everyone knows who the guilty ones are." 

"People might know," Lucidity said, "but that doesn't mean I won't be blamed, that I'm not already being blamed. I've seen the way many of the villagers look at me. It's only become worse since the festival." 

"Why would people blame you?" asked a new voice. It was Shippo, who had come out of Sango and Miroku's hut with a half-devoured apple in his small hands. He'd been sitting with the children, but now he walked up to the group, gazing up at Lucidity with his large, green eyes. "You didn't attack anyone. And the headman isn't having you punished. So what's their deal?" 

"Women are blamed rather often, to some degree," Lucidity said. The child-youkai merely cocked his head to the side and she knew he didn't understand, but she wasn't about to explain how, even in her day and age, people could still be heard calling a girl spoiled goods, saying she shouldn't dress that way and was just asking for trouble being out so late on her own, that she shouldn't have flirted and led the man on. 

"Well, we don't blame you," Sango insisted. "You didn't do anything wrong and you shouldn't care what other people think." 

"Hear, hear," said Miroku. 

"Yeah, those people aren't worth it," Shippo chimed in.

Kagome took Lucidity's hand in both of hers. "Don't think you're alone in any of this, okay?" 

Lucidity considered pulling her hand back, but, in the end, could only shake her head, and felt the natural curve of a gracious smile spreading across her face. "You guys would never let me think that." 

With her expression practically radiating as she beamed, Kagome pulled her into a hug. Lucidity grunted, staring wide-eyed at a grinning Miroku and Sango over Kagome's shoulder. For a moment, she was stiff and unyielding, arms held out awkwardly at her sides. But as Kagome's embrace tightened, Lucidity let out a soft "mmph" and managed a halfhearted hug in return, complete with some patting on the back. 

"What are you going to do now?" Kagome asked once she had pulled away. 

Lucidity opened her mouth to answer, but stopped at a sudden ripple in the air. She turned and spotted the silver head just before Sesshomaru crested the hill that overlooked the area, Jaken at his side. Rin appeared a moment later and waved at Lucidity and the others, then ran down to greet them. 

"Good morning!" the girl said, stopping and smiling up at them all with hands behind her back. 

"Hello, Rin," Kagome said, just as bright and happy. "How're you doing? And Sesshomaru? He usually doesn't visit for so long." 

"We're good," Rin replied, then looked at Lucidity. "But Sesshomaru-sama is wondering if you've made up your mind yet." 

"Huh," Lucidity muttered to herself. "I guess it's been three days; I'm surprised he managed to last." 

"What's that?" Sango asked. 

Lucidity looked over at the daemon slayer. "He gave me three days to decide if I'll go with him, remember?" 

"Oh, that's right," Kagome said. She chewed on her lip a moment before tentatively asking, "So, you've made your choice then?"

Lucidity nodded. "It's for the best, really, that I stay away for a while. Tensions are running too high right now. And if the village's strongest protectors leave with me, that will just make things worse."

Kagome's posture slumped for a moment in resignation before she straightened and smiled. "All right. We'll help make sure you have everything you need for the trip. Rin, when does Sesshomaru want to leave?"

The girl bounced back and forth on her feet, grinning from ear-to-ear. "Now!"

In one, echoing unison, Lucidity's friends all shouted, "WHAT?!" 

Wincing, Lucidity rubbed a knuckle against her ear and braced herself for the coming onslaught.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I'm not sure if an iPad can actually last that long without being charged, even if it is shut off the entire time. From personal experience, I've been able to power one up after a couple months or so at least and still have a decent battery life. And I hope you all enjoyed the "angry" song selection. I almost considered something by Disturbed or even Loreena Mckennitt, but then Queen came to mind and the title of the song seemed too perfect overall. 
> 
> Also I hope the tidbit about making paper and journals didn't drag too much. But I find it to be something unusual and practical. I personally have never made paper, but I really enjoy the thought of handmade journals and pages that have more of a parchment feel to it. I'm a dork, I know! XD 
> 
> And Happy Independence Day to USA readers!


	7. Chapter 7

In his most recent visit to the village, one, indisputable conclusion was drawn: women were the most irritating group of creatures he had ever come across. On an individual basis, the presence of a single woman was endurable. Yet too many together at once and he found himself desiring the company of a thousand youkai thirsting for his blood, rather than listen to the prattle of females. Expressing his desire to immediately depart had no effect on the gaijin. She returned to her hovel to collect belongings she deemed necessary for travel. That much he could permit. With the priestess and daemon slayer accompanying her, however, what should have been a quick and simple task dissolved into unnecessary chaos. Sesshomaru could have waited on the other side of the forest and the noise inside the hut would have still reached his ears, youkai hearing or not. 

"Are you sure she needs all that, Kagome?" 

"Of course! I just wish I could give her decent toiletries. But these will have to do. Lucidity, if you mix these two roots together, it's almost like conditioner. And this is the best substitute for shampoo. What else? Oh! You'll need medicine and bandages for your arm. And knowing the sort of enemies Sesshomaru attracts, you should bring extra. Also an umbrella for the rains." 

"Kagome, you've already shown me how to make most of this. It's mid-summer; these plants are in abundance." 

"But you also need extra clothes and a bedroll. You can wrap a lot of your stuff in a bedroll, too, to save room. Plus, you have Ah-Un. You won't have to carry it all like I did when traveling around with Inuyasha. We should pack some more. Oh, no! What about food?" 

"I made Miroku travel cakes the other day, but he ended up not needing them. Lucidity can take some of those." 

"That's perfect, Sango! We also have a large cache of dried meat and fruit. What else?" 

"Weapons! She needs weapons. I have just the perfect thing. Kagome, why don't you come with me so we can gather what we need? Lucidity can stay here and keep packing." 

If only the women retreating back to the village had been the end of it. In their absence, Sesshomaru sent Jaken to collect the gaijin to no avail. As she would not bow to the orders of a daiyoukai, there was little hope she would obey his retainer. Jaken returned, having failed miserably in his task, with a lump on the side of his head, courtesy of a hard blow from a staff. Matters only worsened when the priestess and daemon slayer reappeared, for Rin now joined the group, bounding around in excitement, something long and glittering clutched in her hand. The two-tailed youkai, Kirara, was with the group as well, following them into the hut. For what reason, Sesshomaru didn't know, nor care to. 

"Come here, Lucidity," he heard Kagome say. "Rin wanted you to have these. Let's put them on you." 

"Wait, what are you doing? Hey! That's-Kagome!" 

"Keep still! I've been wanting to do this for ages. Anyway, Sango says that when you're fighting, you should-" 

"I know! She's told me plenty of times, too. That doesn't mean-OW! Stop pulling!" 

"Then stop moving. OSUWARI!" 

Silence. 

"Wow, Kagome," came Rin's voice. "Does that work on everyone?" 

The women giggled. 

Sesshomaru had to resist the urge to destroy the hut and everything inside. 

The sun had nearly reached its peak in the sky by the time the women emerged. Much to his irritation, Sesshomaru saw what had kept them longer: the priestess had braided Lucidity's hair. The yellow locks were swept into a loose plait over her shoulder with silver strings woven into it; Rin's gift, he knew. And an utter waste of time. _His_ time. 

"Sango, I can't take Kirara," Lucidity was saying, while Rin and Kagome went over to Ah-Un, bringing with them the new burdens the dragon was to carry. "Kohaku needs her." 

"It's okay, really. He said you could take her. He's going to be staying for a couple more weeks anyway. I know you won't be back by then, but she can always find him when you're done. Please take her along; it will give us all peace of mind." 

"But-" 

The conversation died instantly when the daiyoukai swooped down on them. 

"Are you quite finished?" he demanded. "Or shall I wait for someone to put flowers in your hair as well?" 

Lucidity's hand jumped to the braid and something akin to embarrassment crossed her face. 

The priestess ran over to them. "Don't be mad at her, Sesshomaru. It's my fault." 

"Mine, too," Sango said. "We just wanted to make sure she had everything she needed; she isn't used to this era yet and has never been outside the village." 

"Enough of your interference," he said. "We are leaving." 

The women looked anxious, and Rin apologized for her part in delaying him. 

"It's all right, you guys," Lucidity said. "I have more than enough. Thank you." 

"What about Kirara? Will you take her?" the daemon slayer was quick to ask. 

"I...yes, all right." 

It became apparent that there was to be a lingering moment of farewells as Lucidity gathered the youkai in question from Sango's arms and scratched behind one, large ear while the youkai mewled its delight. 

"Gaijin!" Sesshomaru said, his tone sharp and abrupt, and the woman looked over, startled. "Come." 

He did not miss the blue eyes narrowing at him, nor the spark of anger. But he had had enough. He turned swiftly away to begin what he hoped would not be a long and tiresome journey. 

* * *

"So, where are we going first? Kaidame or finding whatever it was that you lost?" 

Silence. 

"...how long is it going to take?" 

Silence. 

"Three weeks? A month?" 

Silence. 

"Are you going to ignore me the entire time?" 

Silence.

"Yo! Fluffy!" 

Sesshomaru lifted his head and cast the woman a withering glare from where she was perched upon Ah-Un, who was keeping pace next to him. Unwilling to walk on foot and apparently not content to sit, Lucidity was standing upright on the dragon, staff thrown over her shoulders and arms draped over the bit of wood, and the two-tailed youkai next to her on the saddle. 

"You do not speak to Sesshomaru-sama like that, woman!" shouted Jaken, waving his own Staff. "Show some respect." 

Lucidity ignored him and bent slightly at the knee, head tilted down, so she was closer at eye-level with Sesshomaru. "Talk to me already. It's been hours. I've said that I'm sorry about earlier. I would have left right away, but...you know how Kagome is; she wouldn't take no for an answer." 

Sesshomaru dropped his gaze to the silver strands in the woman's hair and then the new weapon at her waist, a sword that had belonged to the daemon slayer. 

"Her efforts were a waste. You look ridiculous," he said flatly and quickened his pace to put some distance between himself and the irksome female. 

Alas, so did Ah-Un, putting on a brief burst of speed. And yet, the unexpected gasp and echoing thump that followed made Sesshomaru pause and glance back. 

"Ow..." Lucidity muttered from where she lay on the ground, Kirara standing beside her and quietly observing.

"Hah! Serves you right for your rudeness, human!" Jaken exclaimed. 

Lucidity's staff came up swiftly. The imp barely had time to flinch. 

Sesshomaru caught the staff as it came down, mere centimeters from Jaken, who had thrown his arms up in an effort to protect himself. With a lazy jerk of his hand, he tore the staff from Lucidity's grasp, snapped the wood in two, and tossed the pieces aside. 

"Oh, come on!" she shouted, scrambling to her feet. "I needed that!" 

"You will refrain from assaulting my servant," Sesshomaru said. "Continue in this manner and I will treat you with the same courtesy." 

Lucidity's eyes burned with fury, before suddenly smoldering as she took a step back. "You know what, screw this. I'm out of here. I don't need this crap. Come on, Kirara." 

Sesshomaru was in front of her before she could take more than a couple of strides. "We had an agreement," he said. "I expect you to honor it, wretched human though you are." 

"I agreed to help you!" she snapped in return. "Not endure insults and threats from a dog and his toad." 

Jaken waved the Staff of Two Heads. "You insolent wench! If you behaved as was appropriate of your station-" 

"Enough, Jaken," Sesshomaru ordered and the imp, trembling in anger, quieted at once. Sesshomaru took a step forward, and the woman moved back. From somewhere on the ground, he heard the two-tailed youkai growl as he fixed the woman with an icy stare. "You are not permitted to leave. Once our business is concluded, you are free to do as you please. Until then, I still have need of you."

Her cheeks colored, a flush of bright pink that swept over her face and caused those blue eyes to glitter with such furious animosity. What a willful human, as stubborn as an unbroken animal, daring to pit herself against a daiyoukai with no hope of success. She must have a death wish. Then, without warning, her expression cleared. The anger receded, to simmer just beneath the surface, and a smirk suddenly curved her lips. The unexpected change had him on guard.

"I don't need permission from anyone to do as I like, least of all you," she said.

His fingers twitched, claws sliding together. It would be so simple.

"I'll tell you what, though" she continued. "I'll go with you. No complaints. No more assaulting your servant. But only if you do one thing in return."

Could she not scent danger? Did she not understand what she risked, daring to be so defiant? Even Jaken was beginning to quail at the sight of the daiyoukai's molten glare, and the anger was not even directed at him.

The woman folded her arms. "Say my name."

Sesshomaru felt a muscle spasm near his brow.

"Say my name," she repeated. "You and your servant have called me 'woman,' 'human,' or 'gaijin,' but not once have you used my name. Say it now and I'll stay."

It ruffled his fur all the more when he moved closer and the woman stood her ground, refusing to back down. She glared up at him, the smirk disappearing. "I will not be manipulated," he said, an edge of a growl laced in his words.

"And I will not help someone who can't respect me enough to call me by my name. I don't need you as you do me. I agreed to this because it was easier for everyone. But if this treatment is what I have to put up with, then I'm going back to the village and have Myoga take me to Kaidame instead."

It was not in his nature to lower himself to the taunts or insults of others, especially humans. If a reckless youkai came to challenge him who was unworthy of his strength, he ignored the irritation and continued on his way. If the irritation became cumbersome, he removed it entirely from his path and ultimately his thoughts. His time was better spent on matters more valuable. A female such as this one would have been seen and forgotten in the same instant. Yet, infuriating as it was, circumstances had changed. Needing her help was a blow to his pride. Asking for it doubly so. And now this! Her insolence, her demands, made the situation all the more unbearable. That, coupled with the tension of the last several weeks and his repeated failures to recover what had been taken from him, caused him to lash out. Against all better judgment, he allowed her to break his composure and seized her by the arm when she dared to walk away from him. She cried out. He knew his grip would be painful for her mortal frailty, but he was far from caring as he jerked her back around. He saw her other arm rise, her hand rushing towards his face. The effort he caught it with was laughable. She was no more than a child struggling in his grasp.

In the background, he heard the two-tailed youkai snarl and felt the flare of its energy as it unleashed its true form. Its roar was cut short with Jaken's shout of, "Oh no you don't, Kirara! Stay back! This is between them. You will not interfere!" Fire burst from the Staff and the two-tailed youkai roared again as it tried to battle its way beyond Jaken to reach the woman it had been ordered to protect.

"Let go of me!" she shouted. "Bastard! You-"

His fingers laced with those of the hand he'd caught and squeezed. She cried out once more, one eye closing against the pain, as she cursed at him. So easy, he thought. He was applying so little pressure. Any more and the bones would break. He felt the press of her palm against his, felt the rapid pulse in her wrist, and then the flare of crackling power at their feet.

The power ripped through them from the earth itself, entwining through their hands, and the smell of burned flesh filled his nose before he ever noticed the pain. Every inch of his body was taut with agony, with this energy inside him that was not his own. He couldn't move, couldn't think, and was only vaguely aware of the woman against him.

In a whirlwind of confusion, Sesshomaru found himself on the ground. Piece by piece, his senses returned. He soon became aware of his rapid breathing, of the sweat clinging to his skin, and the warm pressure of another on top of him. He pushed himself up, hardly sparing a glance at the imp who came running over, and peered down at the curve of Lucidity's unconscious body on his lap. Their hands were still locked together. Slowly, he peeled his own away, mouth pressed firmly shut, suppressing any sound that tried to escape; in turn, noises broke from the woman, groans of pain. He stared at his wounds. The entirety of his palm was raw and red. The burn trailed up his fingers and reached around towards the top of his hand. It was not so different as when Tessaiga's barrier wounded him. When he examined the woman's hand, he found that it was the same.

"Are you all right, my Lord?" asked a frantic Jaken. "What happened?"

The two-tailed youkai, still in its unsealed form, came up behind Jaken and lowered its large head, sniffing at the pair on the ground.

Sesshomaru ignored them both as he peered down at the woman, her head resting in the crook of his arm. Was this her doing somehow? He did not believe so. She had been injured just as he, worse even. Bewildered, curious, he touched the ground. Nothing. No aura. No sense of impending threat. The power had come from below, had it not? He lifted his head and smelled the air. Again, nothing. Only the creatures of the forest. Not even a low class youkai was in the area. So, what had it been? What had attacked them?

Another, louder groan from the woman had him looking back at her. Blue eyes fluttered open, disoriented, confused, but soon cleared and filled with alarm.

"S-Sesshomaru?" she whispered. She looked around, growing visibly more agitated with every passing moment, and winced in pain when she discovered the state of her hand.

Gazing at her, the daiyoukai realized he could not find his anger. No, he was unsettled now. In his decades of experience, he had never encountered such an assault. Without form, without warning, like a gust of brutal wind that rose and fell, leaving no evidence as to its origin. A new enemy. Something to analyze, learn from, and then destroy. But first it must be found. Until then, all that could be done was to be prepared for another attack.

The woman pulled away from him. He made no move to stop her, nor help her as she struggled to her feet. Were her injuries so extensive or was she unable to balance without the use of both hands? Sesshomaru stood as well, with a bit more grace and ease of one accustomed to the wounds of battle, and peered down at his palm, then over at the woman, who was doing the same. Her eyes were wide with wonder and shock as she inspected her hand, and then she looked at the ground, her forehead creasing. The barest trace of an idea formed in his mind at the scrutinizing expression on her face. Was it possible? he thought to himself. Could she know something he did not?

Jaken stepped closer to him. "What is it, Sesshomaru-sama?" he asked in a wary undertone.

Sesshomaru watched the two-tailed youkai ease against the woman, giving her a nudge. The woman suddenly slid to the ground on her knees, cradling her injured hand against her chest. Sesshomaru's brief moment of confusion at this action was quickly answered as he felt the thrum of energy emanating from the soil, considerably weaker than before, but no less potent in the taste it left in the air. And it focused solely on the woman this time. She was doubled over, expression strained, but oddly quiet, and gave no reaction at Sesshomaru's approach. Closer now, he could feel the power pulsing through her, a steady heartbeat unto itself. It did not appear to be lethal. In fact, it did not so much as emit the impression of harmful intent. And yet the woman struggled and gasped, the color draining from her face, as she murmured words he did not know, another language.

Sesshomaru lowered himself onto one knee beside her, cautious, but intrigued. His hand rose to hover above her shoulder. He could feel the waves of the unseen force. Pure, raw power that set his teeth on edge. A crackle of sound filled his ears as his aura clashed with the woman's and he caught sight of benign sparks, not unlike the streaks of lightning during a storm, that echoed between her body and his hand. Even after he drew his hand away, the electricity continued to dance between his fingers. He stared at the spectacle, his agitation and bewilderment rising. 

"S-stop."

He looked over at the woman and realized that, in spite of reverting back into his language, she was not speaking to him. She leaned forward on her good hand and dug her fingers into the ground.

"Stop," she gasped, then whispered her foreign words once more.

The power began to ebb away and finally dissipated altogether, gone as suddenly and quietly as it had come, with no trail to follow, no trace of evidence to show it had been here, save for their two, burnt hands.

* * *

The fire Jaken had built by the river was the lone source of light in the long stretch of meadow where their group stopped to camp later that evening. A thin strip of blue along the western horizon would be the last glimpse of sunlight until morning. Sesshomaru had been watching the depleting colors for the better part of an hour, ever since coming to the decision that they would travel no further today and had ordered Jaken to build a fire. The woman, with her injuries, was useless in this task and Jaken made no objections.

Frustrated though he had been at having nothing to track and exact revenge on for daring to wound him, Sesshomaru had decided to move the group to another location as a precaution. The woman hadn't argued and, regardless of her outburst to return to the village, followed them on the back of the two-tailed youkai. She must have realized it was in her own best interest to stay near him, to ensure safety from the enemy that had lingered in its attack on her, though Sesshomaru had no way to fight against it. 

Whatever her reasons, Sesshomaru didn't question her. It was also in his best interest that she remain. And for that, he did little to impede her decisions, even when she wandered away, Kirara at her side, after camp was set up. She returned before long with plants she had dug up and proceeded to make a salve in a wooden bowl that had been packed. Sesshomaru cast a glance in her direction every so often. So far, he had procrastinated in questioning her about the day's events, hesitant to do anything that might drive her away. He loathed having to keep this woman complaisant. The choice for him was removed, as so much had been lately. Recalling her threat of going to the flea only added to the frustration of his predicament overall.

There was little he could do about the situation. He'd explored all possible solutions available and this was the last one. He had to ensure that the woman came with him, unharmed, and willing to help. Only as a last resort would he use the threat of death. Even then, she could lead him wrong. He had to be careful. Of a human. 

Yes, he was less than pleased. And now he had this unseen enemy to contend with. It was no wonder that he sat himself away from the others, to rest against the trunk of a tree and contemplate the concerns that made up his day-to-day life. And too many had come into being recently and he seemed to find himself mulling over every single detail of how this could happen and what could be done about it. He stared down at the scarlet, disfigured skin of his hand, the only physical mark of his difficulties, and felt the stirrings of frustrated anger in the pit of his stomach. Aware that his thoughts were threatening to overwhelm him, Sesshomaru flexed his burnt fingers and gritted his teeth against the pain, in the vain hope that the agony would clear his mind somehow. 

A movement near the fire did little to distract him from his musings. It wasn't until a figure came near him that he gave any consideration to those he shared the meadow with. He looked up in time to see the woman crouching down, set something on the ground, then stand. She caught his eye, acknowledged him with a nod, and began walking away. He glanced down at what she had brought and was taken aback to see the wooden bowl that contained the salve. 

"I have no need of your remedies," he said after a pause, and at the same time wondered how she could not know that, with the amount of time she'd spent around youkai.

She stopped and turned, then shrugged and walked back over. It was then that he became consciously aware of the fact that she hadn't spoken a word since that afternoon. Watching her crouch down to collect the bowl, a memory stirred in the back of his mind and it took a moment for him to see the similarity between this night and a day long since passed, when another mute female attempted to aid him when he was recovering, bringing items that were useless to youkai. Sesshomaru nearly shook his head at the ghostly image of Rin and focused his attention on what was before him. The woman was straightening up again, preparing to leave, when he finally broke the silence between them. 

"Your tongue," he said, and she looked over, pausing again in her movements. "What did you say to the entity that attacked us?"

She lowered herself onto her knees, holding the bowl in the hand not covered in bandages. "What I said in yours: stop." She repeated the phrase in her own language and he recognized same sounds as from before; now, at least, he knew what they meant. 

"Do you know what the entity was?" 

She shook her head. 

"Then why did it obey you?" 

"Honestly...I don't believe it did," she replied. "I wasn't trying to make it do anything. I just wanted it to stop; it was getting overwhelming." 

"It wasn't trying to hurt you. What was it doing?" 

Her lips parted, then closed and pulled down into a frown. "I'm not sure," she said. "It felt like...a warning." She chewed on her bottom lip, uneasy, as she looked at the camp or the river, anywhere but at the daiyoukai.

"A warning?" he repeated. "About what?" 

The wounded hand, which was resting on her lap, suddenly drew in as she wrapped her arm around her stomach. "I don't know," she said. "I really don't. I thought this might be the rising power that Myoga was talking about, but somehow I have trouble believing that. This force didn't feel hostile, even after what it did." Her bandaged fingers curled and she cringed, albeit briefly. 

Sesshomaru was in agreement with that conclusion. And yet he wondered if he could believe the rest of her claims. 

"Do you truly not know?" he asked again.

"I don't." 

He held her gaze. She peered back at him, expression passive, if not a bit worn, and he could detect no hint deception. "Very well," he said, and looked away, dismissing her with the gesture. She needed no further hint and rose to depart once more, but stopped yet again. He watched her out of the corner of his eye as she stood there deliberating. "If you have more to say, do so now or leave," he told her.

She shifted, but didn't move. Just as he was about to dismiss her again, she cleared her throat and spoke. "When people annoy me, I do what I can to make them angry. A lifelong habit, I'm afraid, that I learned from my father. But...I'll try not to do it with you from now on." 

Her words surprised him. It was not an apology, but rather a truce. And the implication of her admission had him thinking back to certain moments: her refusal to reveal her name during their first meeting; her curt response to his unwanted presence the morning after her fight with those men; today, when she had nearly pushed too far; and the times she had struck Jaken with a stone or staff; even when Jaken had been sent to collect her, he had been his usual self with the woman, impatient and demeaning towards the one who made his master wait. Each of her responses had been the result of her irritation with him or the imp and she had been careful to take her frustrations out on them. It was petulant, childish. 

Perhaps what aggravated him the most was that, while she might have been lacking maturity in some aspects, her arguments were not without logic. She understood the balance between them, what was in her favor, and used it against him. And she had done it intentionally. Deliberately provoked him for her own satisfaction and pushed him into a corner at the same time. 

He should have been furious when she revealed all this in her promise not to incite him again. He was, in a way. He was furious with himself for falling so blindly into the trap. Yet why wasn't he angry with her? Why didn't he put the woman in her place or rid himself of her entirely, whether she was of use to him or not? He should have. And perhaps, not too long ago, he would have, when his regard for others was even less than what it was now. He watched the woman settle back down in front of the fire, soon joined by the two-tailed youkai that jumped onto her lap, once again small and harmless, and felt a mixture of resignation and a begrudging admiration for the one who dared pit herself against a daiyoukai...and win. Admiration for the woman who used intelligence as a weapon, the only true weapon in her arsenal that could defeat him. And yet her deception didn't anger him and that, in turn, confused him. 

Was it because he had not realized her ploy until she revealed it to him, confessing what she'd done and promising to stop in the same breath? Perhaps he was too astounded to react as he normally would have. Perhaps there was no point. If they assisted one another and went their separate ways in the end, it did not matter how it was accomplished, so long as they both had what they wanted, right? She was probably aware of this as well. Or perhaps she wasn't aware of anything she'd inadvertently caused with her actions and possessed nothing more than dumb, blind luck. Somehow, he was doubtful of that possibility, remembering her quick deduction of Kaidame's words that had escaped his understanding.

He claimed he would not be manipulated into saying a stupid name. And yet it appeared that she had manipulated him in other ways before he'd noticed the true threat she posed. If she'd been born youkai, she might have made a formidable opponent. His lip curled in grim amusement. He'd been played the fool, but would not underestimate her again. And, should the opportunity present itself one day in the future, he may just repay the favor.  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's this? What's this? There's plot twists in the air!
> 
> Well, not so much as twists as just adding to the plot. And damn that Sesshomaru and his musings. I think I strained a few brain cells and triggered a headache trying to get some ideas across. Or it could have been lack of sleep and staying up too late.


	8. Chapter 8

It went without saying that Lucidity was shaken up by the whole ordeal. She really should learn to curb herself when it came to people of this era, especially a damn daemon. Talk about biting off more than she could chew. Maybe she was just too used to how Kagome dealt with Inuyasha and wondered how difficult it would be to get her hands on some of those beads of subjugation. The idea was quickly dismissed, though. She would just have to pick her battles with more care from now on. And besides, she actually felt a bit guilty about pushing Sesshomaru so far. Her understanding of him from what she had heard and seen was that he was the picture perfect image of control. For him to lose it must have meant he was under far more stress than she realized. And she wondered, again, what it was he was trying to reclaim so desperately, but knew better than to ask.

She didn't ask much of anything after their first day. Hell, she barely even spoke. Granted, she was more or less known for being the quiet type, but traveling with Sesshomaru made her realize what a novice she was in that aspect. However, there was much to think about and it kept her mind occupied over the next couple of days. She hadn't been lying when she told Sesshomaru she didn't know what the entity was, why it had attacked or backed off or what it was warning her about. Well...maybe she knew a bit more about the latter. It made her more than a little hesitant to follow through with the threat of taking off. When she had been on her knees, that power coursing through her, she'd been afraid. Not of the power itself, but rather the sudden, paralyzing dread that returning to the village was a mistake, that the safest place in the world to be was right where she was, and that it would lead to nothing but regret and failure if she left Sesshomaru. It was not as if some voice whispered this inside her mind. More of an all encompassing feeling that didn't fade until she was finally convinced to stay. When all was said and done, she didn't know if this message was the truth or not. She didn't know what or who had sent it, but realized she had very little choice in the matter.

At least she and Sesshomaru had come to an understanding. Mostly it was an understanding that they wouldn't be speaking to each other unless it was necessary. She had promised not to bait him and had managed to stick to that promise. With Jaken she tried to do the same, be civil and not crack him over the head, but he seemed to have no patience for her. Most of the time if she spoke to the imp or asked a question, she was met with scathing remarks or pompous answers which, more or less, pointed out how inferior and ignorant she was. Eventually she began to consider just how insecure he was that he had to put her down at every turn, remind her of her so-called place, and soon came to the understanding that engaging with him really wasn't worth her time.

It was turning out to be a long and lonely journey. By the end of it, she wouldn't be surprised if she went a bit crazy with the need for some decent company and might just welcome Kagome and her entire horde, villagers included. She had her limits like everyone else and being with the daiyoukai and his imp would probably push her to the edge. Hours, then days with saying nothing more than a handful of words. She felt like she was beginning to forget the sound of her own voice and was tempted to strike up conversations out of the blue for the sake of ensuring she still had use of it. But each time the urge seized her, she stamped it down, fully aware of how well her efforts would be received.

So, it was an unexpected surprise when Sesshomaru sought her out about three days after the night of their truce.

The group had stopped for water and fish from a stream. Kirara had gone to find her own food and Lucidity was collecting herbs and other fresh items to eat with the fish Jaken was attempting to catch. She'd set the bowl of what she had gathered on the ground and was now standing on tiptoe beneath a tree, reaching for its fruit, when the daiyoukai approached from behind. Though aware of him before he reached her, she continued in vain to snag the pears from their branches and bit down a groan when she nearly lost her balance. She righted herself and sighed, then glanced over at Sesshomaru, who had come to stand beside her.

"Hi," was the first word out of her mouth, and it felt about as natural as walking on water, like she was floundering. She immediately said the next thing that came to mind: "What's up?"

He didn't reply. She knew there was a reason for his coming to see her, but she couldn't begin to imagine what it was. He watched her for a moment and she him, having absolutely no idea what to do and feeling more awkward by the second. It was a relief when he finally looked away, to peer up at the tree. Then, inexplicably, he reached out and, with an almost lazy gesture, plucked two pears and held them out to her.

She took the fruit with a soft murmur of gratitude, and then nothing. He was still watching her, expression blank, and she could feel her nervousness grow into annoyance. "Sesshomaru, what-"

"Your hand," he said. "Let me see it."

She blinked, then shook her head. Fine, whatever. She dropped the fruit into the bowl and began removing the bandages. The bandages weren't necessary anymore, but she wore them to keep her hand, which continued to ache on occasion, from brushing against anything that might irritate the still healing burns. She held out her arm, palm up, for Sesshomaru's inspection. It was a surprise when he took hold of her wrist and brought her hand up for a better look, forcing her to step closer. She gritted her teeth to keep any complaints silent.

"They're the same," came the sudden statement.

"What?"

Sesshomaru lowered her arm and, still clutching her wrist, held his own hand out, putting it side by side with hers. Bewildered, she stared at both palms and felt a chill run down her spine. Sesshomaru's burn was completely healed, but that wasn't what unnerved her. It was the symbol at the center of his hand, a raised bit of scar tissue that shouldn't have been able to form, if what she understood about his youkai abilities was to be believed. Yet what made her blood run cold was having the same mark of a seven pointed star gaze back at her from her own palm. She swallowed, heart thumping madly in her chest.

Sesshomaru released her wrist and folded his arms. "You did not notice?"

"This...wasn't here yesterday," she heard herself say, gaping at the star. "And I haven't looked until now and...what the hell?"

"An appropriate question," he said. "Do you know the meaning of the symbol?"

She shivered as another chill that crawled over her skin and resisted the urge to hug herself. Instead, she folded her arms tightly and peered up at Sesshomaru. "Yes and no," she said. "It appears in several religions, has different meanings: elements, planets, Spirit of God. The number seven itself crops up again and again, too. But I can't really remember where it originated from first."

The daiyoukai's brows rose ever so slightly. Lucidity couldn't tell if he was skeptical or actually taking into consideration what she had said. "Where did you learn this?" he eventually asked.

"My father," she said. "One of his areas of study was religions of the world, even the dead ones."

"I see," Sesshomaru said slowly. "I would determine the source of this mark; you will tell me what you know."

Despite it being an order, Lucidity found she was agreeable. Of course, she hadn't had any decent human interaction in days and a daiyoukai was better than nothing. It was a good idea, anyway, trying to figure out what was going on. She stooped to pick up the bowl, then froze at an echoing snap of breaking branches, wide eyes fixed on the ground. She didn't move as the hair on the back of her neck stood on end and listened to the heavy footfalls of something large, something most certainly not human coming up behind her. She suddenly realized that the chills hadn't been chills at all, but a reaction to this lumbering creature closing in. Lifting her head, she saw Sesshomaru gazing into the line of trees, unfazed, almost bored.

"Royakan," the daiyoukai rumbled. "Why are you here?"

Leaning back on her heels, Lucidity peered over her shoulder. If Sesshomaru hadn't been standing right there, his calm presence more than a little reassuring that she was in no danger, she wasn't quite sure what her reaction would have been when she laid eyes on an enormous, bipedal wolf dressed in armor. When it dropped to its knees and bowed its great, shaggy head, she was spurred into action. That is, grabbing the bowl and scrambling to her feet, hurrying to stand next to, and maybe a little behind, Sesshomaru.

"Please forgive my intrusion, Sesshomaru-sama," said Royakan, his mouth large and wide and almost comical when he spoke. Almost, until Lucidity thought of how easy it would be for him to swallow a human in no more than a couple of gulps. "I come bearing urgent news. I know you are preoccupied with personal matter, but myself and others believe it vital for you to be aware of what has happened."

Sesshomaru's cold eyes narrowed. "Tell me, and pray that it is worth my time, lest I collect your head."

Royakan flinched and bowed again, while Lucidity stood, mesmerized by the whole scene. "The Viper Clan has been spotted in your territory. There is no evidence of any attacks yet, but they are starting to arrive in great numbers."

"The Viper Clan?" said a new voice. It was Jaken, who had hurried over, Staff in hand. "Preposterous! They wouldn't dare, bunch of spineless cowards they are."

"They would," Sesshomaru countered. "If there was a great enough threat to drive them out of their lands."

To Lucidity's surprise, he glanced at her when he said this. And then she remembered their conversation, the rising power, and what Myoga had said about youkai fleeing from it. "The Viper Clan is coming down from the north," she remarked.

"Yes, yes," Royakan said quickly. "They are running, like all the others, from whatever has been taking their territory."

"Who cares why they're invading?!" snapped Jaken. "Sesshomaru-sama's father banished them centuries ago. If they're desperate enough to risk death by coming back, they're even more of a threat than before."

"Are they so dangerous?" Lucidity asked.

"Yes," said Sesshomaru without looking at her, striding towards the great wolf. "Royakan, you will tell me where they were last seen and then be gone from here."

Royakan bowed. "Yes, of course, my lord. About a day's journey, northwest of here. At least twenty in number, perhaps more. Entire families, not just their leaders."

Lucidity listened, not entirely comprehending all that was said. She wasn't familiar with the the mountain ranges or bodies of water that Royakan spoke of. He even mentioned the names of other youkai who lived in the area where this Viper Clan was spotted, the better to narrow it down, she supposed. In the end, Royakan disappeared back into the forest, his heavy footsteps echoing into nothing, while she, Sesshomaru, and Jaken returned to the stream where Ah-Un was resting and Kirara just returning.

"Let's show those Vipers the consequences of coming where they are not wanted," said Jaken, bounding forward to take hold of Ah-Un's reins.

"I am going alone, Jaken," Sesshomaru said. "You will stay here."

"What? But why, my lord?! The human will be fine with Kirara. Please let me accompany you!" the imp cried and dropped the reins in favor of flinging himself in front of Sesshomaru's feet in a prostrated bow.

Sesshomaru walked right over him, literally a boot in the face, that left Jaken twitching on the ground.

Lucidity had no desire to set eyes on this Viper Clan, let alone go with Sesshomaru to confront them. And yet she wasn't certain how she felt about his leaving. It wasn't that she would miss his company, or lack thereof, but his being here meant extra protection. She hated to admit it, even to herself, but she felt more secure with him around.

"We will continue our discussion when I return," Sesshomaru said when he stopped in front of her.

She nodded. "How long will you be gone?"

"As long as it takes. Do not leave the area unless you have good reason."

Before she could reply, he brushed past her, so close that she felt the sleeve of his haori caress her arm. She turned to watch him, a mixture of foreboding and bitter acceptance curling in the pit of her stomach, knowing she would just have to sit and wait. A groan reached her ears and she glanced down to see a forlorn Jaken staring after his master, then glare up at her.

"Why am I always stuck babysitting you stupid humans?" he griped.

"Oh, would you shut up for once?" she snapped, though there was no real bite in her words. Sesshomaru turned his head and she caught a glimpse of a single golden eye peering back at them.

"Do not kill Jaken in my absence," he said. "I have already used Tenseiga on him once."

Lucidity highly doubted that was a joke, but grinned all the same.

* * *

The sound of the quill scratching against paper was rhythmic and soothing. Any time there was a lull, the utter silence of her surroundings pressed in upon her ears like a heavy blanket and made her eager to resume the steady pace of her writing. Lucidity was sitting on the ground, her back against Ah-Un's massive frame while the dragon slept, and hadn't budged probably going on two hours now. Legs drawn up, she had one of the newly made journals Rin had helped her with propped against her knees and was reading over the last few lines with intense concentration. Absently, she stroked her chin with the feathered end of the quill and soon started tracing the outline of her lips, a habit born from the combination of boredom and comfort. She eventually crossed out the last line to better re-word her thought and dipped the quill into the bit of ink contained in a stained seashell used for just such occasions.

When the last punctuation was made, she set the quill down and flexed the fingers of her aching hand, shaking it out to relieve the pain of writer's cramp. Just her luck that it was her dominant hand that had been burned. Today was the first day she'd been able to write. There was a great deal to record and she wasn't done yet. But her body was starting to protest the lack of movement and she began to pack up her writing tools, leaving the journal open until the ink dried. She poured the ink from the shell back into its container, a slim thing made of wood and specifically designed for liquid. She carried two of these inro, one for ink and the other for water, and could never mistake them as one was smeared with black marks from the stains on her fingers. After setting all this aside, she rose to her feet, stretching and groaning, then went to the stream to wash her hands. Kirara, who'd been resting beside her, lifted her head and let out a soft mew. 

"It's okay; go back to sleep," Lucidity whispered with an indulging wave of the hand. Kirara did not need telling twice and tucked her head beneath her tail, curling up in a tight ball. Lucidity lowered her hands back into the water and rubbed them together, too lazy to dig out the soap from her pack. Maybe it was time for a bath, anyway. Sesshomaru had been gone only a day and the last time she had washed was the day before that. She ran a hand through her hair and felt the build up of oils and grime. Yes, definitely time for another wash. The stream would have to do; she doubted searching for hot springs was a valid reason for leaving the area. Besides, she didn't know the countryside and had no idea where to start looking. Maybe Jaken did. If there was a hot spring nearby, close enough to make it there and back in a single day, she could take Kirara. But she had to wait for Jaken to return first. She couldn't bathe next to their camp and didn't want him to come searching for her if she was going to be naked and wet. 

Speaking of which, where _was_ that imp? Lucidity glanced downstream, then up, but saw no sign of the little shit. Hadn't he said he was going upstream to fish? Why he couldn't do that here, she didn't know and suspected he'd disappeared more out of the desire to be alone, probably to mope in private. She stood and shook out her hands, peering around in the hopes of finding something to do. (Who knew that journeying with a daiyoukai could be so boring?) It didn't take long for her to spot the wakizashi Sango had given her, laying beside her pack. She picked it up and unsheathed a few inches of the blade. Though she and Sango had spent months practicing with bokken, she felt ridiculous carrying a real sword around. She was no warrior and hadn't tried out this weapon at all. Shouldn't she have had more training before Sango had entrusted her with it? The same with Kirara?

Lucidity glanced over at the sleeping youkai and couldn't begin to understand why Sango or Kagome or any of them would do so much for her. She was little more than a stranger and an unwanted intruder as far as the other villagers were concerned. It was only because she and Kagome were from the same era that she'd been accepted at all. And, to be honest, it was more tolerance than acceptance. But the extent of Kagome and Sango's hospitality, of their friendship, astounded her. She didn't feel like it was deserved and kept them at a distance the best she could, and still they came at her like eager, overbearing mothers. Shaking her head, Lucidity sheathed the sword and tied it to the corset belt she wore cinched around her tunic. Gods, the corset, tunic, and leggings, even her damn boots. All made from youkai skin or silk. Also gifts from Sango. She owed that woman so much, dammit! 

Where the hell was Jaken? Lucidity thought angrily, wishing to distract herself. Before she realized it, she was trudging upstream. He'd been gone long enough. If he was fine and wanted to be left alone, she wouldn't stop him. But if something happened to the little shit while she was alone with him, she doubted Sesshomaru would be happy, whether it was her fault or not. In her frustration, she kicked a stone, smoothed and rounded from the water, and watched it sail a few feet ahead. She kicked it again and again every time it was within reach. Maybe when she found Jaken, she could "accidentally' send it flying at his head. Or leg. An arm would do, too. Grinning to herself, she continued with her little rock-kicking game as she wandered further and further from the camp. Idly, she wondered why he had gone so far. She was starting to leave the meadow behind and was heading into an area with more trees and shrubbery. Maybe he had said downstream, not upstream. She should probably go back and get Kirara so the youkai could sniff him out. Coming to a decision, she stopped and scooped up the stone with the intention of lobbing it into the air, not caring where it land. 

"Dammit, you're going to tell us!" 

The abrupt shout from a distinctly male voice made her jump. Clutching the stone tighter in her hand, ready to throw it, she looked around, but could see nothing save meadow behind and forest ahead. Yes, she should definitely go back for Kirara now. She had run only a few steps, however, when she heard a much more familiar voice. 

"I've already told you, you filthy human! Only the worthy can wield the Staff of Two Heads!" 

Lucidity spun around, heart pounding. 

"Why, you! You're going to tell us how it works before I make this river your grave!" 

Shit! Fuck! Goddamn it all to hell! 

With no time to reach the camp, Lucidity booked it towards the noise and felt the first rush of adrenaline. Wind whistled in her ears. Her focus narrowed to what lay directly ahead. She barely noticed the slight bend in the stream or how the trees cleared to reveal what had not been seen before. Two men dressed in armor, one on the bank holding the Staff and the other standing with his legs spread in the middle of the stream, gripping something that was brown and flailing beneath the water. In some corner of her mind, she registered the scent of cooked meat and noticed a third form on the ground, something black and smoking with a striking resemblance to a human body. But her attention was for the man who had hold of Jaken. 

"[Hey!]" she shouted, slipping into her mother tongue on reflex. The man looked up at the sound. Still running, she hurled the stone hard. It hit the the man directly in the eye. He cried out in pain and dropped the imp in favor of clutching his face. For a moment, the current carried Jaken towards her. She didn't even register the possibility that it might already be too late before the green head jolted up and he took a great breath of air, already scrambling for land in water that came up to his waist. The man, still covering his eye, reached for him. 

Lucidity didn't remember unsheathing the sword or springing between Jaken and his attacker or even bringing the damn weapon down on the latter. With a yell, the man jumped out of her reach. She could hear the other one shouting, but she was too intent upon the first. He'd drawn his own sword. Dimly, she noticed that his eye was red and starting to swell. She was more focused on the blow that reverberated through her when their blades met. The water rushed around her legs, up to her knees, and she knew she was at a disadvantage. But the man was already backing up, moving onto dry land, and she continued to press him until finding soil beneath her feet. 

Jaken was yelling somewhere in the distance. The other man hadn't stopped shouting. And the one in front of her was wielding his sword with deadly purpose. She danced out of his reach when he swung low, blocked when he swung high, heart echoing in her ears and threatening to drown out all other sound. Yet she could still hear her own breath, fast and sharp, an edge of panic. Crap! Was she actually panicking? She couldn't afford to panic, not now! There wasn't anyone else here to help her. Gods, what was she doing?! This was crazy! How could she think she could take on a real fighter?! She hadn't thought. That was the problem. She'd just jumped in and acted the hero. So fucking stupid! 

The doubts whirling in her mind broke her concentration. With a cry, she felt the sword knocked from her grip on a hard, downward stroke from the man. She skittered away as he surged forward. Sunlight reflected off the blade that rose above her head with lethal intentions and she was suddenly petrified, legs refusing to move, as sheer terror seized her.

_"You would have perished against a true warrior."_

Sesshomaru's voice rang in her head as the sword came down. It triggered something deep inside, perhaps the primal need to survive. And, as though in defiance of the memory, she dove to the side with hardly a second to spare, felt the cold brush of the blade against her hair, and caught the man's leg with her foot, his momentum doing the rest of the work for her. He stumbled, but didn't fall. Yet it gave her the opportunity she needed to snatch up the fallen sword. She was coming up as he whirled around, his weapon raised, preparing for another killing blow, and she drove the sword through his armored chest. 

He went still. She saw the shock on his face as he peered down at the blade sticking out of his body, both arms above his head, clutching a weapon that was now useless in a two-handed grip. Warm blood gushed freely from the wound. And then she saw the muscles of his face slacken. He lost his hold on his sword and it fell behind him as his arms dropped to his side. He managed to lift his head, a rather feeble effort that made his neck wobble. She met his gaze and saw his horror draining away, along with the glowing flicker of life in his eyes. The next moment, she was staring into something empty and hollow. She stepped back and pulled the sword with surprising ease out of the corpse, which fell at her feet. She stared at the blood-covered blade. The only coherent thought she could muster was the question of how this had penetrated armor. And then she remembered that the sword had belonged to Sango. All her weapons were made from the body parts of youkai. 

"Lucidity, look out!" 

Her head jerked up at the call of her name, a sound so foreign from Jaken's lips that it snagged her attention immediately, as did the other man running towards her, holding the imp's Staff like a club. His expression was contorted with blind fury. His lips were parted wide and she knew he was screaming a war cry, even if it was no more than a dull echo in her ears. Her legs were already moving, her body reacting before her mind could catch up. She ducked the wild, furious swing of the enraged bull of a man, and brought the sword up. Even before he fell to his knees, she knew her aim had been accurate. Whether it was deadly or not remained to be seen. But when she turned and saw him drop the Staff in favor pressing both hands to his stomach, she knew she had struck something vital. Red droplets were decorating the ground as she walked around to stand in front of him, giving him a wide berth, mindful of the sword still sheathed at his waist. His glare was murderous, but she hardly paid mind to the hatred radiating from him and, instead, took in the sight before her. 

His hands were covered in blood that continued to spill from the deep gash across his stomach. His fingers pressed and moved over the exposed flesh that was torn open, pushing at.... Lucidity almost took an involuntary step forward. Not back, as most would do, but forward, to see if her eyes were deceiving her. No, she wasn't mistaken. That wasn't his stomach the man was holding, per se, but his intestines, sliding over his fingers to dangle a couple inches down the front of his armor. 

"Wow," a voice said at her knee. "You made quick work of this one." 

Jaken walked forward, keeping an eye on the wounded man. Yet his walk was more of a stroll as he retrieved his Staff. "That's what you get for trying to steal from me, human," he said.

The man's eyes bulged with maddened fury and he made a swipe for Jaken. The imp jerked out of his reach and, Staff clutched tightly in his grasp, hurried to stand behind Lucidity, who noticed the man's hand flying towards his weapon. Without thought, she snapped the blade of her sword up and pressed it against his neck. He stiffened, slowly lowering his arm.

"Do it," he grunted. "Finish what you started, woman." 

Lucidity could feel the sweat on her palm as she gripped the hilt tighter. Staring down at the man's face, so drained of color and resigned to his fate, pure and utter malice in his gaze, she found her mind curiously...blank. 

"Eeto...Lucidity?" The tentative voice of the imp did nothing to break her focus, whether he was deliberately saying her name or not outside the heat of battle. "Let me finish him for you. Save you the trouble of cleaning up." 

The man spat at her feet. "Coward," he hissed. " _You_ did this. _You_ finish it!" 

Lucidity swallowed, but didn't raise her sword. Nor did she lower it. She gazed at the man, never breaking eye contact. He was already dead; they both knew it. What difference did a final killing blow make? Jaken was offering and yet...she couldn't allow him. She understood that much. Sango had taught her how to fight, but little about any code of honor. Lucidity knew these people were proud, would rather suffer death than live in defeat. And, really, she would be sparing this man a painful, drawn out death. She stared at the bare throat that he exposed to her, his eyes never leaving hers. And still she didn't move. 

"You will regret it," he bit out. "If you leave me here to die, I will make sure my other men will find you, you and all the other disgusting whores who associate themselves with youkai. You kill your own kind for them!" He spat at her again, face twisting into a scowl of pain and loathing. "Filthy bitch! I'll make you pay! You and all of your friends. Every last one! Do you have any idea what we do to women like you? We show you exactly what you're worth! The pleasure my men will take with you and your friends will only be the beginning. You'll be begging, crying for forgiveness long before we're through with you."

Sango. Kagome. Rin.

Their faces sprang full and bright into her mind and a seething, white hot rage flared inside her chest as she stared down at this bastard who cursed and spat and called her filthy. What would he have done if she wasn't armed? What he threatened now, the same as he had done to others? And...and for what? For what he perceived as wrong?! No...no that was an excuse. People like this didn't need a reason to justify the delight they took in torturing others, the delight they took in killing.

In a single movement, Lucidity granted the man's wish. She raised her arm and brought the blade swiftly across his throat, a clean, deep, and final strike. The surprise in his gaze was brief before his eyes rolled up and he crumpled onto the ground. Lucidity stepped out of the way as blood soaked into the earth and peered down at one body, then the other, as if expecting some kind of great revelation.

"Well, you're certainly more useful than Ah-Un," said Jaken. "Here comes that lazy dragon now with Kirara. What took them so long? We could have been goners. We should head back and pack up the camp. We can't stay here if there are more humans heading this way. Come on. Let's get going before this blood attracts any predators."

Lucidity's gaze slid over to the imp, whose enormous eyes were fixed on her. This was all...normal for him, she realized. What was another dead human, after all, to a creature centuries old? She glanced over at Ah-Un and Kirara as they descended to the ground, Kirara immediately hurrying over to inspect her charge. Putting a hand on the youkai's large head, Lucidity absently scratched behind an ear and peered back at the bodies. Kagome had once asked her if she could ever really take a life. Lucidity hadn't lied. Killing should not be done lightly. And in all honesty, she hadn't known if she was capable of it or not.

Well, she had her answer now.

 


	9. Chapter 9

Nothing. 

That was the fruit his search had yielded. Absolutely nothing. There was no trace of the Viper Clan, not even a scent to track. Royakan was a fortunate idiot. Had he not named the other youkai of the area, Sesshomaru would not have spoken to them and confirmed the rumor of invaders. He would be collecting no heads today. If Royakan returned with further claims, that would be another matter; he could abide the cry of a wolf for only so long. Enough time had been wasted. Several days worth of travel had been lost. More than that, he might already have what was his returned by now. He was in no mood for further delays. He was in no mood to discover corpses in lieu of the absence of Jaken and the woman, and yet that was what awaited him upon his return to the meadow. 

Three bodies in all. One was burned beyond recognition with the glimpses of white bone beneath charred remains, scattered here and there by scavengers. The other two were in pieces, as well, and almost completely devoured, save for what the armor protected. The carcasses were covered in old blood, crawling with insects and maggots. Cuts in the armor and footprints on the ground painted a picture for the daiyoukai, who, in spite of the evidence, hesitated to believe the story behind it. He found himself staying longer than he normally would have to inspect the scene, circling the remains and studying the markings in the dirt. What was burned had been Jaken's doing; he needed no markings to tell him that. But it appeared as if Lucidity was responsible for the rest.

Sesshomaru was more than accustomed to humans slaughtering their own kind in great numbers. Yet he had assumed Lucidity was not the type. Not because he held her in higher esteem-which he did not, regardless of how brazen she was-but because she was part of Inuyasha's pack of humans. They killed only youkai, never humans, and avoided doing so at all costs. Lucidity did not, which potentially put her at odds with those who called her friend. Sesshomaru wondered if they knew what she was capable of. 

Though his curiosity was not sated, the carcasses had no answers to give him. He left to follow the faint smells of youkai and female that still lingered in the area, no more than a couple days old. Jaken had led the group out of the meadow and deep into the forest, then up a steep slope of the surrounding mountain not easily accessible on foot. Ah-Uh was the first to be spotted, the form unmistakable from a distance, laying next to the rocky bed of a creek. The dragon turned at his approach and Jaken appeared, scrambling to the top of the large bulk to stand upon one of the heads.

"Sesshomaru-sama, you've returned!" came the predictable, but no less excited greeting of his servant. "Did you find the Viper Clan? Did you drive them out? I bet they begged to be spared. I hope they learned their lesson to never come back here again-" 

"No." 

The softly spoken word from the youkai lord rendered Jaken instantly mute. He stared at Sesshomaru, mouth slightly open, before he swallowed and continue, albeit with more hesitation. "You-you were not successful, my lord? I mean, some got away? Royakan said they were coming in great numbers. It's-it's understandable if some were able to slip through your-" 

"Jaken," Sesshomaru said, and the imp flinched in expectation of a blow, "where is the woman?" 

"What? Oh! Uh...." Jaken turned around on the dragon's head to survey the area, but the only other creature nearby was the small form of the two-tailed youkai drinking from the shallow trickle of water. "She was here a minute ago. She's been...she hasn't spoken much, or at all, I think, since we moved camp." 

Sesshomaru slid his arms into opposite sleeves of his haori. "What happened?" 

The imp's large eyes came to rest on him. Jaken shifted, but was saved the trouble of giving an immediate answer when Ah-Uh suddenly laid down, causing Jaken to gasp and fumble to hold on. But once the dragon was settled, he clambered off. "Eeto...Sesshomaru-sama," he began as he stepped over the rocks and looked up. "What happened was that I was set upon by a human when trying to fish. I managed to dispatch him, but his companions caught me unawares. They wanted the Staff, you see, after they saw me using it, but there was no chance I was going to let them! I was fighting for all I was worth. The Staff was entrusted to me by you, Sesshomaru-sama; I could never let it fall into the dirty hands of humans! So, I-" 

"An embellished story is not what I wish to hear," said Sesshomaru. "Tell me how it ended, Jaken." 

The imp jumped as though he'd been struck and bowed deeply. "Of course, my apologies!" He straightened and took a breath, rubbing his hands together. "The humans were threatening to drown me when Lucidity came and...and she...she, uh...." 

"She saved you," Sesshomaru murmured and Jaken, seemingly embarrassed, nodded. 

"Yes," he said. "The first one nearly got her, but she managed to stab him in the heart, and then executed the second one. I didn't think she would; she definitely isn't like the humans who have trained her." 

Sesshomaru blinked. Executed? That was not what he had imagined. A kill in self-defense or to protect, perhaps, but execution? To hold a life in your hands and make the conscious decision to take it? Jaken was right; she was not like Kagome or the other humans. Not even Inuyasha would have committed such an act. How interesting. 

A clap of distant thunder caught his attention. Sesshomaru lifted his gaze to the sky. The clouds overhead had been gathering since late morning. Now, with the sun beginning its decent, the day was darkened with the gray of coming storms and temperature was dropping rapidly. An inconvenience, one of ill timing. Another delay, he thought with a ripple of annoyance. If it was only himself, he would have no need to care. Yet a human could not tolerate long exposure to inclement weather and there was no point in resuming his travels if the one in his company fell into poor health.

"Shall I go find Lucidity, my lord, and bring her back so that we might be on our way?"

"No," he said, scanning the lines of trees on all sides. "Take Ah-Un and find us shelter."

"Yes, my lord. Right away. I take it you will look for Lucidity, instead?"

Golden eyes slid over to Jaken. It had not escaped his attention, Jaken's use of the woman's name. He must have been grateful for the rescue, even if he feigned humiliation. Sesshomaru could not help but remember his parting words to Lucidity, ordering her not to kill his servant. The irony of the situation was enough to make the corner of his mouth curve upward and he let out a soft breath of amusement before starting down an unseen path into the forest. Behind him, he heard Jaken mutter, "I...I guess that's a yes. Ah, well, come along, then, Kirara."

The woman's trail was easy to follow, but she had gone some distance, further up the mountain, far from the protection of the group. Though there were no other threats in the area, Sesshomaru mulled over this apparent lack of awareness and considered the mental state of the woman. It was then that he realized he hadn't considered the possibility that she had never taken a life before. Not all humans could cope with such a deed, not even some youkai. Jaken had mentioned her lack of speaking, but that was not unusual. Or was it worse this time, enough for Jaken to notice?

When the ground leveled out and trees began to thin, he saw her, and she was doing something rather strange. She was a strange human, overall, from another country, another era, but this sight he had to pause and consider. He stopped short of stepping out into the open when he found her. She was laying on her stomach, on a precipice that overlooked the meadow they had abandoned, arms folded beneath her and a pile of rocks beside her. This alone would not have been enough to be unusual, nor whenever she would pick up a rock, lean over the edge, and let it drop. No, it was the rise and fall of her scent as she watched the rock plummet to the earth, the way her eyes rolled shut and she would pull back, shake her head, and let out a deep breath. Her scent changed with each of these actions, grew stronger, filled the air with tension, then relaxed and dissipated. She did this several times in the short while he watched her, stopping only to glance up at a rumble of thunder. He found himself parting his lips, the better to taste her scent on his tongue, attempting to understand what was happening. The fluctuating aromas, though, were starting to agitate him.

Suddenly, Lucidity shoved the few remaining rocks over the edge and pushed herself back onto her heels, eyes closed and head tilted back. Then, she rose to her feet, her movements slow and deliberate. She stepped away from the edge, a hand going to her head, but then she wavered, eyes opening, and leaned forward. The scent was coming off her in crushing waves now and, without warning, a rush of anger seized him when it finally dawned on him what she intended. His only coherent thought was how sickening the fragility of humans was as he bounded forward in a blur of speed that had caught even the most skilled of youkai opponents unawares. 

He was at her side before she could so much as place a foot over the ledge and snatched her by the wrist, yanking her away. She screamed. The sound was short, piercing, and sweetened the aroma of fear as never before. The air was saturated with the potent taste. It was a moment before he noticed she was shouting at him. Her language again. Eyes wild, face white, she struck him in the chest with her free hand. He flung her away. She fell hard onto hands and knees and he caught the faint smell of blood, mingling with her fright and enriching the scent to greater heights. Prey. That was what she smelled like: the perfect prey. Had he been a lesser youkai....

"What do you think you are doing?!" he growled, his body stiff with control.

She was doubled over, hands clutching the front of her shirt, breathing fast and shallow. But now she rocked back, fixing him with a burning gaze, and opened her mouth. He understood nothing of her answer, save his name at one point, the foreign words flowing together, unable to pick one from the other, until, eventually, she slowed enough to find whatever remained of her mind.

"Dammit, Sesshomaru!" she shouted. "You scared the crap out of me! What the fuck is wrong with you?!"

He blinked, then narrowed his eyes and took a step forward. "You ask that of me, woman, when you are the one attempting to claim your own life?"

Her stare was incredulous. She glanced at the cliff, then back at him, repeating the action twice more before finding her voice. "What the hell are you talking about?" she demanded, starting to stand, only for her knees to buckle, and dropped back down. Cursing again, she glared at him, bracing herself on her hands. "After everything that's happened, don't you think I would have killed myself long before now if I was the sort?"

Uncertainty rose inside him, threatening to puncture his temper, but he would not be made the fool again. He came to stand in front of her and she leaned back, peering up, meeting his hard gaze with her own. "Jaken has told me what took place while I was gone, what you did to those men. You would not be the first to commit suicide over guilt. How else am I to interpret your behavior?"

She gaped, looked at the cliff once more, gaze lingering this time, then took a deep breath and covered her face with her hands. When she looked at him again, her anger was gone. And then she made an unanticipated declaration: "I'm afraid of heights."

It was his turn to stare. For some reason, he had more trouble believing this confession than the thought of her willingly taking a life. 

"When it's bad, I become lightheaded, sometimes dizzy, and my ears start to ring," she continued, attempting to rise once more. And, again, she lost her footing and pitched forward onto her hands.

The explanation sounded absurd, and yet....

"That is why your equilibrium is unbalanced?" he asked.

She nodded, eyes closed and hand pressed against her temple, as she sat back on her heels.

"Why would you put yourself in such a precarious position? As you are now, you would have fallen."

"This," she tapped the side of her head, "is your doing. If you hadn't grabbed me like that and spun me around, I'd be fine." His mouth thinned and a hand clenched at the accusation. "Besides," she added, "you were watching; you wouldn't have let me fall."

He folded his arms inside the sleeves of his haori. "Do not be so certain." She looked up and gave him a faint smile, and he felt the last of his anger drain away. Taking a breath, he tilted his head back to peer at the overcast sky and listened to the thunder that was growing steadily closer. The scent of rain reached him before he felt the first telltale droplets on his face. "Come; we cannot stay out in the open like this." 

She nodded and tried to find her feet a third time and was nearly successful. Sesshomaru watched with an increasing sense of impatience as she collapsed. If she hadn't ventured out here, knowing her fear, they would have been well on their way. A reprimand was on the tip of his tongue when he suddenly stopped and considered what she had said, that he was responsible for her current state after misinterpreting the situation. If that was the truth, if his...mistake was the reason she could not stand, then he was under an obligation. 

Sesshomaru let out the barest of sighs, and extended his hand. 

Lucidity's surprise could not have been more evident. She stared at the proffered hand, lips parted and eyes wide, and didn't move. In fact, she sat so still for so long that Sesshomaru was tempted to retract the assistance. He saw the hesitation in her gaze when she finally looked up at him. Not a word passed between them and neither looked away. She didn't trust him and the feeling was mutual, or at least it had been. The fact that she would slaughter not one, but two of her own kind made him question his opinions of the woman. And what was more, she hadn't done it for herself, but for Jaken. Sesshomaru couldn't understand. She held no fondness for the imp. She didn't need to keep him alive for any other purpose, except perhaps to appease Sesshomaru, whose help she did need. That would have been sufficient enough of an explanation, if it hadn't been for the human she had executed. That wasn't necessary. So, why had she done it? Yes, his opinion of her had changed. He considered her more dangerous now, but not to him, nor to Jaken.

And she was not so prideful as to refuse his aid, he noted, feeling her hand slide into his. Or perhaps she was spurred into action as the droplets began to fall in earnest. He lifted the woman to her feet and permitted her to lean against him while she tried to regain her balance. The way she shifted conveyed a tension in the closeness. He recalled what happened last time and resisted the urge to flex his scarred hand. After a short while, she stepped back, still holding onto his arm. He felt the grip relax by small degrees, only to suddenly latch on like the powerful jaws of a beast when Ah-Un crested the trees without warning to land next to them. She stumbled and Sesshomaru caught her on reflex, an arm sliding around her shoulders, while Jaken shouted that a cave had been located. Yet his exuberance quickly evaporate at the glare leveled in his direction.

"Forgive me, my lord, I did not mean to interrupt. I see that you found Lucidity and...are you not wanting to get out of the rain just yet?" 

Golden eyes narrowed at the implication of the words and Jaken quailed. Sesshomaru lowered his gaze back to the woman, who was watching the interaction with open curiosity. She raised a brow at him, but he did not answer any unspoken questions. 

"Are you able to walk?" he asked. 

She nodded and pulled away. Other than a moment of uncertainty when her legs quivered, she remained upright. 

"Eeto," said Jaken. "The path up to the cave is too treacherous for a human to climb." 

Sesshomaru did not miss Lucidity's grimace, but no complaint was heard as she lifted herself onto of Ah-Un.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the short chapter! Originally chapter nine was long, very long, too long. Well...maybe not too long for some, but definitely for me and I broke it up into two separate chapters. So, as a result, chapter ten is almost done and I hope will make up for chapter nine. 
> 
> And the vertigo here might be a bit over dramatized, but it can happen in extreme cases of phobia. Maybe not exactly like this, but hey! It's a fantasy story! Stranger things will happen! XD


	10. Chapter 10

Indeed, there was no direct path to the cave. Located higher up the mountain, large rocks and boulders created obstacles that made it impossible for one to continue on foot, which provided little chance that anything or anyone would come upon them while they made use of the shelter. And it appeared to be ample enough to accommodate his group. The mouth of the cave alone told him that even Ah-Un would be able to seek refuge from the tumultuous downpour of the storm. Jaken had had the presence of mind to collect dry timber before the rain started and built a fire prior to retrieving his master. Heat and warmth were radiating throughout the enclosed space as Sesshomaru stepped in, shaking his head and pushing the wet locks from his face; he may suffer no ill affects from the damp and cold, but it did not mean he enjoyed being drenched and his robes as weighted masses hanging from his body. He had already moved closer to the fire and was removing his swords when Ah-Un lighted upon the ground just outside the entrance.

Jaken and Kirara jumped down and rushed for cover, but the woman was slower to follow. Sesshomaru had kept close watch on her on the way here, to ensure that her brittle equilibrium did not cause her to fall. She had spent the entire ride with her face buried in one of Ah-Un's manes and that appeared to have helped, as she had little difficulty dismounting and no further trouble walking. Ah-Un followed inside at her urging and shook out his heads. The group was showered with another bout of water and Sesshomaru had to swallow a growl of irritation as a drop struck him in the eye. He turned away, listening to the fire sizzle and protest, and went to sit in front of the dancing flames, his back against the cave wall. After setting his swords aside, he shifted his shoulder and lowered the saturated mass of the mokomoko onto the floor, yet that was all. He would not sit in his skin with present company here, and nor did he have change of clothes, unlike Lucidity, who had unpacked her belongings and was using the dragon as a way to shield herself while she dressed.

"I hope the storm passes soon," Jaken said as he, along with Kirara, joined Sesshomaru at the fire. "When will you resume your search for the Viper Clan, my lord?" 

"When it is necessary," was the simple answer. He said nothing more, while Jaken kept up a steady flow of dialogue. He caught phrases of "get what's coming to them" and "wait until they have a taste of the Staff of Two Heads" as he stared into the fire, his thoughts churning. Absently, he began to ring the water out from the ends of his hair, the motions smooth and automatic. He had no desire for a more extensive search until after he recovered what was taken from him. And the Viper Clan was of little concern to him for now, but not a problem he could ignore in the long run. Their audacity to cross the boundaries into his lands was nothing short of declaring war, whether they were fleeing from an encroaching enemy or not. If they did not intend hostilities, a diplomat would have been sent to request an audience with the daiyoukai and see if a compromise could be reached. If stories of the rising power were to be believed and it was such a threat as to cause such a dangerous clan of youkai to turn tail and run, the Vipers could have easily come to him for assistance. Yet they hadn't. They had made their choice and forced his hand. If necessary, he would kill them all. 

"Have you no shame?!" 

Jaken's outburst pulled Sesshomaru from his thoughts. He looked around, none too surprised that it was Lucidity who had prompted the shout of indignation. Lucidity appeared to be confused, but Sesshomaru realized at once what had upset the imp this time. The garments she wore were peculiar, more so than the design of the youkai silk he was accustomed to seeing her in. One glance told him that this was the attire she'd had on when she arrived to this era. When she made mention of it, he had assumed the clothes were the same as what Kagome had worn years previously. But these ones were different. The material molded to Lucidity's body and her figure was what had Jaken bristling. 

"Put something decent on, woman!" the imp shouted, but she rolled her eyes and ignored him in favor of returning to her tasks. "We can see everything! Go change at-what are you doing?! Don't dare expose yourself to us!" 

In the process of kneeling and spreading out the youkai silk to dry, Lucidity had leaned over and the low neckline of her top did nothing to hide the outline of her bust beneath it. Proud daiyoukai though he was, Sesshomaru was male and could appreciate the female form like any other with such inclinations. And he was suddenly aware of this woman's form now. She was curved in ways he had not noticed until this moment, because the youkai silk she customarily wore was looser and just large enough to hide the finer contours of her shape, a shape he had only ever truly glimpsed once from a distance, when she slipped beneath a waterfall and out of view. He saw her now as she knelt over her clothes, paying no regard to the seething imp, wet hair spilling over her shoulders in a wild mass and brushing down bare arms. And when she leaned back, she dragged both hands through the thick tendrils, pulling the locks from her face and over one shoulder, bringing more attention to her figure with the movements.

"Stop flaunting yourself!" Jaken was yelling. "What do you hope to gain with such lewd behavior? Do you think to win favor by displaying your endowments?"

"You know, Jaken, I really have to wonder about you," Lucidity said, her voice light, a shadow of a smile on her lips. "Why do you care how I'm dressed? You don't find me attractive, do you?"

"Of course not!" The answer was all but a screech.

Lucidity's smile widened slightly, but Sesshomaru said nothing, gave no warning; he let the imp learn this lesson on his own, as the daiyoukai had had to do.

"So, are you worried that I will distract Sesshomaru then?" she asked softly.

"Are you crazy?" was the haughty reply. "You're human; you could never hope to...er...." Jaken faltered at the sight of the broad grin that spread across the woman's face.

"Then what's the problem?" she asked. "If I have no hope of succeeding in winning the favor of anyone here, why do you care if I flaunt myself? From what it sounds like, you believe I'll just make a fool of myself instead. Or are you afraid that you're wrong and that I actually can distract Sesshomaru? Or is it you, Jaken? Do _you_ like looking at me and want me to remove the temptation?"

"I...that's....not what I.... That's not the point! You're being indecent!"

The woman shrugged and the imp scowled. Yet his hot air of blustering had run its course and he said nothing more. He sat, arms crossed, and glowered at the woman while she continued to situate herself. Her movements and the crackle of the fire were the only noises in the cave apart from the storm. Thunder echoed overhead. Sesshomaru glanced over to the cave's mouth when a particularly bright flash of lightning illuminated the ground, followed a second later by a cracking boom of thunder.

"Good thing we're not traveling anymore," Jaken remarked. "It's too dangerous now with the storm right on top of us. I hope it clears by morning; we've been delayed long enough."

Sesshomaru was in silent agreement. Arms folded, he returned his gaze to the fire. He was becoming impatient, but he would not allow himself to become reckless as a result. If they resumed their journey by air instead of by foot, a day's travel could be saved. That had been his intention, until he learned of Lucidity's fear that not only crippled her, but their progress. He could not spend his time being concerned that his translator would fall from Ah-Un at a moment's notice. In this way, she had become a far greater distraction, more so than dressed in those strange garments.

She should not be a distraction at all, the daiyoukai thought to himself, as the woman in question finally walked over to the fire with two bundles and her writing materials in hand. And yet here he was, too conscious of the fact that she was sitting down next to him. She maintained a respectable distance, but nonetheless he found himself too aware of her presence, of each movement she made tossing one bundle to a bemused Jaken and untying the second for herself to reveal the dried travel food. He recalled the scent of her on the cliff and his jaw clenched. This was unprecedented. Acknowledging the fact that a female had an appealing form was one matter. Giving it greater regard was another. He had more important issues that demanded his attention and nearly ordered the woman away from him. Yet that was an impulse born of frustration, one he would not indulge. So, he treated this development as he would anything else that was beneath him: he ignored it.

"Lucidity," he said. "I would continue our discussion now." Yes, much more important matters that he needed to focus on.

"Mmm, yeah, all right," she replied, sounding distracted as she knelt upright and began digging through a pocket located on the front of her lower garments. But then she paused and Sesshomaru saw her head turn in his direction out of the corner of his eye. "Wait...did you just say my name?"

He blinked, his lips pressing together in displeasure, as he kept his eyes on the fire. She spoke again in her language, a set of sounds that he was becoming familiar with, but did not know the meaning of, and then she sat back, extracting something long from the pocket that caught the light. In spite of himself, he glanced over and thought he was looking at the silver strands that had been braided into her hair at the beginning of their journey. But then he saw the clasps and the unfamiliar pendants.

"Not that I'm complaining, but how come you're using my name all of sudden?" she asked as she fastened on the two necklaces.

"If you have no complaint, then why do you ask?" he countered, not bothering to mask his annoyance.

She lowered her arms, the jewelry resting against her chest. "I'm just curious. First Jaken, now you. I never really expected it from either of you, to be honest."

"I'm under no obligation to explain myself to a human."

Her surprise was brief. And then he saw the door shut over her face, her expression smoothing itself out and her eyes like cold mirrors of his own, albeit blue rather than gold. A well developed and nearly perfected mask of arrogant indifference, one that had little affect on the daiyoukai. Too many days spent in her company had shown him too many fractures. She was a reserved woman, yes, but not the icy perfection she strained to achieve. A cold heart would not have risked life for Jaken, nor acknowledged any hunger by sharing food. A cold heart would not smile or laugh. Then again, he admitted, she was well on her way to that cold perfection. Her smiles were altogether rare and brief and often bitter. And laughter had only been heard once, that day when Rin had shown them that odd, noisy contraption. The woman seemed to have the potential for warmth and cold, and was precariously balancing between the two. Was her time here tipping that balance until there was naught but one possible outcome?

Why was he wasting his time thinking about this? What concern of it was his if this woman became a miserable, old hag? He watched her as she drew her knees up, journal open to a blank page and feathered writing instrument in hand, and remembered when he first saw her, living alone on the outskirts of the village, tormented by the children, and knew that to be her future should nothing change. The knowledge left him with a feeling he could describe only as discontented.

"Why did you kill those men?" he found himself asking.

Lucidity did not respond at once, but when she looked up, her glare was mutinous. "Are you seriously asking me questions after refusing to answer mine?!"

"Sesshomaru-sama is a powerful lord who answers to no-"

"You do not speak for me, Jaken," said the daiyoukai, his voice sharp. "I will tolerate no further interruptions from you. Do so again and you will spend the night in the storm."

Jaken shrank away from the fire and scrambled onto his knees, bowing his forehead to the ground over and over. "Y-yes, my lord. Not another word. My humblest apologies. I will-I will stay by Ah-Un until you have need of me," he added quickly and darted away to the corner of the cave the dragon was sleeping in. The two-tailed youkai, that had been nudged awake when Jaken ran past, yawned and moved to the other side of the fire to lay down by the woman's feet.

Sesshomaru leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes, acutely aware of the one next to him, shifting around and shutting her journal, clearly unable to focus on so trivial a matter as recording daily activities. He listened as she rose to her feet and opened his eyes to see her carrying her belongings over to the pack, including the food that hadn't been touched.

"We are not finished," he said.

She didn't answer, but kept her back to him as she began stowing everything away.

"Lucidity," Sesshomaru murmured, and she stopped, peering over a shoulder at him, eyes glittering with anger. "Your brazen actions have not all been well received, but you have proven worth in putting yourself in peril for the sake of one you have feigned no affection for. I would understand the reason."

She stood and walked back over, gazing down at him for a moment before sitting in the same spot as before. This time, she faced him, one leg folded down and the other drawn up, elbow resting against her knee and head propped against her hand. Her eyes fixed onto his and she took a breath. "You...are a royal pain," she said, and there was a hint of resignation in the words, a quiet defeat.

"And you are insufferable," he replied coolly.

The corner of her mouth turned up, only to fall a second later. The flickering gleam of amusement disappeared from her eyes to be replaced with an inward glaze of thoughts, ones that were troubled, and he knew she was contemplating her answer. He made no further demands, sitting in silence and listening to the storm in its endless raging.

"I could always claim it was self defense," she finally said, gaze still distant. "It's not the truth, but...you already know that. You wouldn't have asked otherwise. And I'm not a very good liar, despite what some people think." She looked at him then, as if gauging his response. He said nothing and she continued. "The first one, even though he was trying to kill me, I could have disarmed him, injured him. In some way, he could have been incapacitated. But I wanted to make sure he wouldn't get back up. It may have not been a conscious decision at the time, but I know what I did." She looked down, yet he did not believe it was out of shame; she seemed to be pondering on one thought or another and he made no interruption, waiting. Before long, she spoke again, voice soft, without inflection: "The bastards didn't deserve to live."

Sesshomaru was taken aback. That was not what he expected to hear, not in the least. And, again, he realized it was because of her association with Inuyasha and the ideals he and his humans carried; Lucidity was not the same. How much did she hide from them? His surprise was enough that he did not notice at first that a silence had fallen between them, not until Lucidity raised her head and caught his eye.

"You would pass judgment and be the executioner?" He was not patronizing in his tone, merely curious, and she straightened, scrutinizing him.

"Jaken didn't tell you what the other one said, did he?" she asked. "That he had more men and what he would have them to do me and other women like me, the ones who befriended youkai. They had done it before. They used youkai as an excuse to rape and kill I don't know how many women. Women like Sango or Kagome, even Rin. Why should wastes like that live when they've murdered others, others who were guilty of nothing but being different?" The more she spoke, the more agitated she became, the more animated. Her cheeks had flushed with anger. Her eyes were burning. Hands were clenched tight and she was starting to tremble. "Tell me how the world is better with them in it! People who hurt others, who take pleasure in it, who kill for pleasure...." She was too beside herself to continue. As words failed, she fell back against the wall and pushed both hands into her hair, gripping hard and closing her eyes.

"You have suffered at the hands of such people before," Sesshomaru said, confident enough in his conclusion that he did not immediately believe what was meant when she shook her head.

"No," she said, folding her arms across her lap. "I had never been attacked before. I never needed to know how to fight before. But I've always hated people like those men. Anyone who has no respect for life I want nothing to do with. Goddamn," she suddenly added, lifting her arms, but dropped them the next second, as though astounded by her own thoughts. "This life is all we can be certain of. Here and now. It's what matters." Her hand reached up and squeezed one of the two pendants she wore, rubbing it hard between her fingers.

Sesshomaru had wanted an explanation. This was more than he had imagined. No, Jaken had not told him the words that had been exchanged between Lucidity and the one she had executed. If he had, Sesshomaru would not have needed to sate his curiosity. And yet the answer was far more complicated than he would have assumed otherwise and he would rather know the truth as a whole.

"Your passion is considerable," he eventually said and Lucidity glanced up, startled, and then a hint of embarrassment filled her eyes.

"Sorry," she said, looking down and lifting the necklace up to rest against her lips. "I didn't mean to get so carried away."

"There is no need to apologize; I wanted to know your reason and you acquiesced." He paused, watching her fiddle with the pendant, the manner almost childish in a way, especially when she put it between her teeth, her stare vacant. To think this woman capable of conviction so strong. His soft exhale was enough to draw her attention and she looked at him. "Taking life to protect it," he said. "The concept is not unreasonable." 

"Only you would say that."

Only he? His hand found Tenseiga and had brought the sword across his lap before he became fully conscious of the act. He peered down at heirloom that had once been his bane. Someone to protect. Killing in order to protect. Sesshomaru did not know why he had not understood the woman's actions sooner. His fingers ran over the sheathe as he felt a faint furrow in his brow. He remembered well the price that was paid to learn what came so easily to this woman. Once, he would have met her beliefs with contempt. He would have killed her without thought the moment she refused to help. Once, he would never have deigned to speak with a human at length, let alone allow one so close to him.

"Are you all right?"

Sesshomaru looked over at Lucidity, who was still holding the necklace between her fingers and watching him intently. "You are not like the other humans I have come to know," he said. "None of them would have done what you did and they will not condone it."

"You mean...everyone back in the village?" she asked, tension gripping her shoulders.

"I have no intention of telling them," he assured her, and she relaxed. "But I would know something else: have you ever killed before?"

She stared at him a few seconds, then shook her head.

"Do you regret your actions?"

"I...think about it, about everything, all the time, but I don't think so, no."

"But you feel anger," he stated, and she nodded. "Don't."

She looked surprised, as well as confused.

"Accept it," he continued. "Accept what happened. Move on and do not dwell. Killing is sometimes necessary. Not all can admit that truth."

She let out a sigh and finally dropped the necklace so that it bounced against her chest. "A necessary evil, you mean then?"

"Do you consider yourself evil?" he asked. "Or me?"

"Well...if I take your history into account," she began, but stopped when he frowned at her. Again, she sighed and shook her head. "No, no I don't. You're a pain in the ass, but not evil."

Sesshomaru lifted a hand from Tenseiga and cracked his fingers, displaying the long, deadly claws while keeping his gaze locked onto hers. "Call me that again and you will find yourself questioning your judgment."

Her eyes darted between his face and the claws, back and forth several times before she eventually leaned forward, jewelry dangling around the low neckline. Her grin was filled with mischief as she whispered, "Whatever you say, Fluffy."

Lucidity's yelp echoed around the cave when the Whip of Light snapped at her cheek and she fell backwards, rubbing her face. The two-tailed youkai awoke with a start and jumped to its feet, hissing, fur on end. Lucidity glared at Sesshomaru as he retracted his energy, his cool eyes focused on the pout forming on her lips. Then, a wide smile split her mouth and she broke into gales of laughter, rolling onto her side and clutching her stomach. The two-tailed youkai sat down on its haunches and tilted its head at the display.

"Worth it!" Lucidity gasped. "So worth it!"

"Enough of your foolishness," Sesshomaru growled, but she only laughed harder. He slid his arms into the sleeves of his haori and sat back. Watching her as she wiped tears from her eyes, her cheek bearing no mark from the warning strike of the Whip, he found the laughter more of an inconvenience than an irritation.

* * *

Eventually, Lucidity agreed to the discussion he ultimately sought, and he found it disappointing in the end. After a mutual peace was reached, she spoke to him with a sense of ease and told him what he wanted to know without complaint. She explained what she could from her sporadic childhood lessons and warned him again and again that she knew very little of any one particular subject, but was able to draw facts from different areas and cover a basic idea. Elements, planets, and Spirit of God were mentioned once more. Yet, as she had said before, the star and the number its points represented were repeated too often to verify an exact meaning. Too much lore surrounded the mark and, as Sesshomaru came to realize, some of her information was too drastic a concept. The planets she named, for instance, were completely new to the daiyoukai and the idea that she called a "solar system" sounded more like a child's tale of fantasy.

Their scars would be another question to put to Kaidame, Sesshomaru decided when no conclusion could be drawn. As it involved Lucidity, he speculated if the Seer would wish to deal with her alone or both of them. That was a negotiation Sesshomaru was not eager for. The hoarder of knowledge was a twisted old bird and would make ridiculous demands. When Sesshomaru had visited him last, Kaidame asked for a splinter from the Staff and a thread of silk from his haori. Decades before, he had wanted a volcanic rock dipped in the blood of a water dragon. There was no possible way of predicating what the Seer would bargain for. And as Lucidity was human, she had even less to offer. What was it that Kaidame wanted from her?

Sesshomaru did not ask her. There was no point. She could no more imagine the answer than he could. He let her rest. Their talk had lasted well into the night. This was the most extended conversation Sesshomaru had had with anyone in years and it had given him much to think about, and little of it was pleasing, some of it unsettling. For a long while, he stared down at his palm, tracing the design with his eyes, this scar that he had been branded with, and wondered at the meaning of it, of the significance. And why did it bind him to a human? Why this human? Was she important somehow? Was his needing her abilities with languages just the beginning? His hand tightened into a fist. What use could he have of her? What purpose beyond his immediate need of her?

Morning came and with it the reprieve of a dry sky. The storm had blown itself out not long before sunrise, but clouds remained scattered overhead, thick and threatening to release more of their deluge onto unsuspecting travelers. The occupants of the cave rose one by one. First the two-tailed youkai, stretching and yawning before bounding outside to search for food. Then Ah-Un, waking Jaken, who toppled over when the dragon stood and padded after Kirara. From where he stood outside, Sesshomaru observed the groggy imp wander to the mouth of the cave, rubbing his eyes and staring out at the muddy land.

"Are we setting out soon, my lord?" Jaken asked upon coming to stand beside the daiyoukai.

Sesshomaru peered up at the sky. "Wake Lucidity," he ordered.

"Er...must I? Wouldn't it be best to let her wake on her own?"

"Do it."

Jaken blanched, but obeyed. That is, he first stood at the entrance and called out to the woman. And when that elicited no response, he reluctantly went inside. Sesshomaru watched as Jaken used the Staff to poke Lucidity in the shoulder, maintaining as much distance as possible while bidding her that it was time to rise. There was a grunt. She moved, but it was to roll over and present her back to the imp, who started hopping up and down in frustration.

"Would you wake up already?!" Jaken shouted and ran over to her, forgetting all precautions. "Up! Up! Get your lazy carcass up alrea-GAH!" He jumped back as Lucidity jerked upright without warning, hair a disheveled mane around her face, casting a shadow over bright blue eyes gleaming with violent intent.

"Jaken," she said in a low voice and he took several steps away. "Was that your Staff you were trying to stab me with?"

"I...it's...Sesshomaru-sama wants to leave and...he...I had to wake you and...."

Lucidity's scowl, coupled with her move to stand, was enough to send the imp scurrying out of the cave while she snarled a threat after him about where she would stick his Staff if he touched her with it again. Jaken didn't stop running until he was safely behind Sesshomaru.

"She's a mad woman," he panted. "I'll be glad when we've returned her to the village."

The Staff was an ill advised method, in Sesshomaru's opinion. But her response was exactly the reason he preferred to risk Jaken's safety instead.

Though she stumbled and grumbled a good deal, Lucidity changed back into her youkai silk, tucking the necklaces beneath the tunic, and saddled her pack onto Ah-Un. The group remained outside the cave while she went back in to retrieve her sword and put out the last of the embers. Sesshomaru waited by Ah-Un, his back to the cave, as Jaken secured the reins and fitted the muzzles on.

"You will be riding on Ah-Un?" Jaken asked.

Sesshomaru did not respond. The answer was obvious enough, save that he intended to ride with Lucidity. That was the decision he had made during the night. He could not travel by air without risk to the woman; this was the only solution, if she was agreeable. And it would have to be done when they set out for Kaidame; it was best if she became accustomed to traveling this way. But when he took hold of the reins, he heard a familiar rumble that made him close his eyes. Thunder, which meant lightning, which meant they would have to remain on foot, and should the rains return....

His eyes snapped open as the rumbling grew louder. He heard a rhythmic echo of what sounded like the clatter of hooves. And then a gasp. The jolt in Lucidity's scent had him whirling around, her fear a sweet tang on the wind and he saw her standing, just inside the mouth of the cave, peering up at the fragments of rock falling from its ceiling. But beyond her, higher up on the mountain, he saw more, the cascade of mud and trees, rocks and boulders that was starting to cause the ground beneath his feet to tremble in its ferocity. There was no coherent thought in his mind as he sprang forward. She was running, trying to make it out of the cave, but even with the speed of a daiyoukai, it was too late. His arms wrapped around her as he propelled them as far into the cave as possible. Yet there was no time. He barely managed to shield her with his body as the landslide, triggered by the heavy rains of the storm, descended on them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops! Was that a cliffhanger? 
> 
> Sorry, not sorry! XD
> 
> Edit: 
> 
> Hey all! I have to say that parts of this chapter are really bothering me. I keep going back to figure out how to better word some ideas. There are a lot of thoughts I'm trying to get across in this chapter and the next. I've already edited a couple of things, so just a heads up if you've already read all the way through. That being said, any feedback is appreciated, even if it's something you flat out don't like about what's happening. I'm not used to writing for an audience and I definitely want to keep you all entertained with an enjoyable experience, even with some of these darker themes. ^.^


	11. Chapter 11

The churning earth reverberated above for what seemed like forever and a lifetime. When it finally settled, nothing but ringing silence followed. Silence and darkness. Absolute darkness. Lucidity could see nothing, but she could feel the weight of it, of Sesshomaru. The smell of damp soil was all around, but it was the daiyoukai she was most aware of. He'd grabbed her, pushed her down, but that was all he was able to do before they were covered in dirt and rock. He was on top of her. She could feel the cold press of his armor, the legs tangled with hers, and the skin of his neck against her cheek. Warm and very much alive. His pulse was near her lips, steady and reassuring. But he wasn't moving. Lucidity shifted beneath him and there was no response. Her own heart was quickening. She swallowed, tried to calm herself, tried to think, but a fog was settling over her brain. They'd been caught in a flood of mud and rock, buried in it, buried alive! Her chest constricted. She was breathing so fast. She needed to stop, needed to think. Again, she moved, pushing up, but could barely lift her hips before the great weight pressed her back down. Her breathing came in sharp stabs of pain. She couldn't seem to catch it. She was hyperventilating, she knew, just as had happened on the cliff. She had to calm down! Moans broke from her as she began to squirm, trying to speak, trying to get this damn daiyoukai to wake-

"Stop moving!"

The voice was rough with anger, reprimanding and disapproving, and just about the sweetest sound she had ever heard. She groaned with relief. "Dammit, Sesshomaru, I thought you were unconscious!"

"No," he grunted, turning his head. "I was assessing the amount of debris above us, which would be made easier without your distractions."

Lucidity shivered; it couldn't be helped with his mouth against her ear when he spoke. She swallowed and released a deep breath, only just becoming aware of how tight her hold was on him. She loosened her grip, but didn't let go. She felt him start to ease up and several clumps of dirt fell onto her face and neck. Shaking her head, she turned her face away. "How are we not completely buried in all this?"

"There is a boulder on my back; it created an air pocket."

It took a moment, or several, for those words to sink in. And even then, she found herself repeating, in a tone dulled with shock, "There's a boulder...on your back?" A trickling growl was the answer she received and she decided it was a good time to shut up. Yet she marveled at the strength of the daiyoukai. Hearing stories was one matter. Witnessing it firsthand, even in the pitch black, was another entirely. She never really appreciated the absolute power that Sesshomaru kept so easily contained and knew that she had yet to see the true extent of his abilities. And here she was, trying his patience and calling him a fluffy, pain in the ass; it was amazing he hadn't cracked that Whip at her sooner.

With a grunt, Sesshomaru moved. The caress of fabric against her face told her that he had a hand on either side of her head. He pushed himself up and the dirt began to fall in earnest. And then she felt an arm slide beneath her shoulders, wrap around her back, and lift her to the daiyoukai. Automatically, she pressed her face into the material of his robes, eyes squeezing shut. She was not embarrassed to show that she was afraid, or to even seek reassurance in the embrace. She didn't think about it, but put her trust in Sesshomaru to get them the hell out of here.

His flare of energy washed over her, brought a gasp to her lips, made her back arch and body tremble, and she tightened her grip on him, burying her face deeper. The vague sense of vertigo made itself known as Sesshomaru brought them swiftly upright, apparently throwing off the mass of weight and debris in the same instant. A deafening clatter of rocks and tremors filled the air, felt right down to the bone and caused her to grit her teeth. She had the strangest sensation of flying and didn't realize the accuracy of her assumption until solid ground was beneath their feet. It took a moment for Lucidity to open her eyes. And when she did, the breath caught in her throat.

Sunlight streamed into the gaping hole of the cave's entrance, blown apart by the power Sesshomaru had unleashed. Yet that wasn't what had sent a thrill of sensation through her, not what caused her to lose feeling in her legs or her heartbeat to race. The gleam of Sesshomaru's aura was fading. Her skin was bathed in the red glow where she clung to him. But it was the deep, scarlet eyes peering back at her that had Lucidity holding her breath. She knew her own eyes must have been as round as saucers, her shock too great to mask. She felt her lips part with a breath she could no longer contain and her heart skipped as if in complaint at the lack of oxygen.

As red receded into white and the blue of the irises faded back into gold, Lucidity slowly became conscious of the fact that she was molded firmly against Sesshomaru's body. Not only were her fingers threatening to tear the silk of his clothes, his arm was an iron vice around her waist. Her skin warmed as everything sank in, as the adrenaline churned inside, and she realized he wasn't pushing her away. He was looking her over, maybe inspecting for wounds. And yet she was quite certain she wasn't bleeding from the face, because he didn't seem to be looking anywhere else. She swallowed, afraid to move, afraid to speak, as though something fragile would be broken if she so much as took a step.

"Sesshomaru-sama!" someone began to shout. "You're all right! I was worried you might have-but of course you didn't. It was such a relief when you blew apart the mountain. Nearly took me with it, but Ah-Un got us out of the way in time."

Jaken's voice was distant to her ears, despite how he was descending on Ah-Un right next to her and Sesshomaru. Kirara, in her full form, soon joined them. Lucidity still hadn't released the daiyoukai, but noticed his brows contracting, saw the downward turn of his lips, and felt the brief tension in his arm before the warmth of it disappeared and he stepped away. She did the same, but found it much more difficult than it should have been. His eyes were moving over her, narrowed, for some reason angry. And then he turned and walked over to Ah-Un. Jaken scrambled out of the way as Sesshomaru mounted the dragon and took the reins in his hand. With a quick shake of her head, she began to make her way over to Kirara.

"Lucidity," he called. "You will ride Ah-Un with me; I will not have you falling if you become faint again."

She hesitated, unable to ignore how Jaken was looking between her and Sesshomaru from where he sat behind his master, his mouth open a bit too wide, his expression much too knowing in her opinion. Then, steeling herself, she approached Ah-Un, and almost shied from the hand that Sesshomaru offered. Her mind spinning, she forced herself to take it and was soon lifted up and placed in front of the daiyoukai, his armor against her back. His arm was lowered around her, his hand holding onto the reins. And when Ah-Un took flight, Lucidity had to close her eyes and turn her face from the wind.

Shit! she thought when she felt Sesshomaru draw her against him more securely. Fuck! Goddammit all to hell!

* * *

It had finally happened. Being trapped in this violent era of war and daemons had finally driven her fucking batshit crazy insane! Knocked a screw loose. Made her a few fries short of a happy meal. Cuckoo for fucking cocoa puffs. That was it. That _had_ to be it. Because no way, in her right mind, could she start nursing an attraction to that cold eyed, son of a bitch! Yeah, sure, she'd noticed he was handsome, perhaps prettier than was normal for a man, but it was no different than her noticing some of the village men. She gave them a passing glance, enjoyed what she saw, and then moved on. She had no interest in starting a relationship with anyone, physical or otherwise. It had been the same way with Sesshomaru, past tense being the issue.

What the fuck was wrong with her?! 

With a loud, drawn out groan, she covered her face with her hands and resisted the urge to bash her head against the nearest stone. Instead, she slipped several more inches into the water until it was up to her neck. The steam of the hot spring rose in front of her face and obscured her vision of the surrounding trees. In desperate need of a bath after being covered in dirt and grime from the landslide, and also wanting an excuse to be by herself, she'd asked Sesshomaru about any possible springs nearby. He hadn't answered and she'd believed he was back to ignoring her again, until he brought them here. By now, she'd finished washing and had no desire to go back. But she wasn't certain how long she'd been gone at this point and knew she needed to return eventually. Her gaze darted up to the darkening sky. Sooner, rather than later.

But then she pictured Sesshomaru and red eyes flashed through her mind once more. She felt a jolt she most definitely did not want to feel and, squeezing her eyes shut, completely submerged herself into the water, as though hoping to wash away any and all impure thoughts. Why the hell did she have to react to those eyes? She became a little flustered if he stared too long, certainly, but she'd been able to put aside any longing before. And now the ache of it was almost more than she could bear! Not to mention that damn, sensitive nose of his. The very thought of him catching _that_ scent on her was mortifying. A dip in a cold river might have been better, she thought to herself as her lungs started to burn in protest. She moved towards the edge of the spring to grip the ledge, broke the surface of the water for a fresh gulp of air....

And found herself face-to-face with Jaken. A space of a heartbeat ticked by as they stared at each other, her brain working to comprehend what she was seeing. Then, with a shout, she punched him square in the face. His cry rang in her ears as he went flying backwards and she dropped into the water, arms crossing over her chest. 

"What the fuck, Jaken?!" she screamed. "What are you doing here?!"

"You didn't answer when I called!" the imp wailed from where he was rolling back and forth on the ground in pain, hands clutching at his face. "I had to check! I thought something had happened and Sesshomaru-sama would kill me if I didn't make sure."

"And what do you think I'm going to do to you for spying on me?!"

The imp climbed to his feet, keeping his back to her. "I wasn't spying! Sesshomaru-sama sent me to come check on you."

She let out a huff. "Fine. You've checked on me. I'm still breathing. Now leave so I can get dressed."

He started to run off, but stopped and turned, his eyes squeezed tightly shut. "Be sure not to wear those revolting clothes. We don't need to see that crude display of yours ever again."

Lucidity had to admire the improvement in her aim as the rock struck Jaken right between the eyes and sent him scurrying back to his master, probably cursing her the whole way. She followed a short time later, pack in hand, after letting the air dry her and dressing back into the tunic and leggings. The sight that greeted her upon walking into the camp was one of quiet repose with the daiyoukai and imp sitting around the fire, while their four-legged companions foraged nearby. She cast a sideways glance at the imp, who was rubbing at his forehead and staring blearily at the ground.

"I believe we have already discussed the consequences if you assaulted my servant again," said Sesshomaru in his usual tone of seeming indifference. "I can only assume you had good reason to go against my orders."

"Depends on who you ask. And you don't order me, Sesshomaru," she replied calmly, and took a seat on the ground, with ample space from both him and Jaken.

"Perhaps I should not have saved you, then, if this lack of respect is to be your gratitude."

Shit. That stung.

Reluctantly, Lucidity looked over at Sesshomaru. He was leaning back against a tree, one leg drawn up and an arm thrown over his knee. Shadows cast by the fire danced over the smooth, expressionless face and the light reflected in those golden eyes seemed to resonate, demanding an explanation. She swallowed, her stomach in knots. This was insane. She was insane. She looked away, back to the imp, and studied the bloody lump on his forehead. Her mouth twisted at the unease of turmoil and frustration caused by such a simple statement. There were too many emotions coming to the surface. Without realizing she had made any sort of decision, she flipped open her pack and dug inside until she found what she was searching for.

Without a word, she got to her feet, walked over to Jaken, and dropped a small container of ointment in front of him, then stepped out of the clearing. She walked aimlessly through the trees and brush, guided by nothing more than her desire for solitude. In the back of her mind, she kept her bearings, so that she would be able to find the others without the need to search for the light of the fire. Eventually, she stopped and plopped down in front of a random tree, legs drawn up and forehead pressed against her knees. This was immature, she knew. Running off to go pout in a corner. But she needed time. She needed space. Somewhere to collect her thoughts and get a grip on herself. 

People said to let it all out. To shout and scream or cry and wail. Get all the pain and anger out in the open. But Lucidity didn't want that. She could process emotions just like the next person. She'd been furious, upset, even wept a few times. But she never allowed it to consume her. Tears were fleeting and despair was useless. Anger could keep her going for a while, but even that had to be controlled. Sesshomaru had said as much last night. Don't dwell. Accept and move on. It was a shocking bit of advice that was comforting in a way, because it was not so different from how she handled the ordeals life threw at her. Compartmentalization was what kept her sane, kept her from being overwhelmed by this place. She took everything one day at a time; she had to. She couldn't stop and reflect on her predicament. She couldn't linger on the constant worry that she would never get home. If she did stop, if she did wonder or doubt or anything of the sort, she didn't know if she could handle it. She'd come close a few times and was quite certain that her first nervous breakdown was just around the corner. 

There was no choice but to force everything down. She couldn't afford to let herself feel, not to that degree. From the very beginning, she focused on finding a solution to her problem, rather than focus on the problem itself. And while doing that, she learned to live in this era, from making a fire and clothes to learning plants, how to be useful, and then how to defend herself when the need arose. But she didn't want to make any connections here. This wasn't her home. These weren't her people. And the ones around her trying so hard help-Kagome, Sango, Miroku, all of them-were kept at a distance because she was so damn detached. Too detached. 

Fingers dug into her scalp, pulling at her hair, as she bared her teeth, a noise threatening to rise in the back of her throat. Face still buried against her knees, she let out a ragged breath, trying to calm down, but the same thought continued to play across her mind: she'd killed those men. That was supposed to mean something. Killing someone meant killing everything about the person, a future, a family, a legacy. But she'd done it. She was capable of it. And what truly bothered her was that it didn't bother her, not like it was supposed to. She didn't feel guilty, just angry. And that couldn't be normal. 

_"Do you consider yourself evil?"_

Lucidity opened her eyes as Sesshomaru's question echoed in her mind. She'd said a lot of stuff last night, including that the men didn't deserve to live. They caused pain and death for fun. How many more would they have hurt? How many more lives ruined or lost? Lucidity swallowed. She considered them evil, not herself. Teetering back and forth in her uncertainty, she just couldn't bring herself to believe that it was wrong to rid the world of those bastards who were guilty by their own admission. Taking a deep breath, she tilted her head back against the tree, lowering her arms onto her lap, and peered up through her lashes at the leaves of the foliage and the night sky above, dotted with clouds that had never shed their rain and filled with stars beyond the counting.

Sesshomaru was right. This was a different world. A different time. And sometimes darker deeds were necessary. She couldn't dwell, couldn't stay angry. She had to accept and move on, like he'd said, or there would be no surviving this era. Memories of the previous night surfaced and, without realizing it, she'd reached beneath her tunic and extracted the shorter of the two necklaces she usually kept hidden. She rubbed the ankh between her fingers, bringing it to her lips, as she continued to gaze up at the stars, thinking.

It really had been a comfort, talking with Sesshomaru. She never would have imagined sharing her thoughts with him of all people could actually help. But she had and it did. Without meaning to, she'd gone off on her little rant, her reason for what she had done, and he had not only listened, but went a step further and advised her how to handle the aftermath. If she had told anyone else.... Yet there wasn't anyone else. That was why she had ultimately shared her thoughts with Sesshomaru. Not because he had asked, but because he was the same. He knew what it was to take a life, youkai and human. Then, he had turned around and saved hers. And she hadn't even thanked him.

And there it was. Guilt. Deep, sickening guilt that made her chest constrict and a sense of great shame crept up on her. To think this cold eyed, son of a bitch could make her feel so terrible, make her feel something that wasn't rage or fear. She closed her eyes. There would be no screaming or ranting tonight. No nervous breakdown. Thinking about what he'd said, what he'd done, helped her remain centered. He'd spoken with her out of curiosity; he probably never meant to ease her distress. But he had. He'd even made her laugh, albeit unintentionally. And how had she repaid him?

Coming to a decision, she rose to her feet and walked back to the camp. Everything was as she'd left it, save that Jaken had an empty ointment container next to him and Kirara was back, sitting near the fire and cleaning herself. At Lucidity's approach, Kirara gave her usual, mewling greeting. Lucidity paused to crouch down and scratch her head in response, moving her fingers to rub beneath the furry chin.

"Are you finished with your childish displays?"

Lucidity closed her eyes at the question, at the rumbling voice of disapproval, and took a moment to brace herself before straightening and walking over to the daiyoukai. Sesshomaru didn't look at her until she was standing in front of him. And even then, she felt a keen sense of disdain when she met his lofty gaze. And then she dropped hers and lowered herself onto her knees. A sharp inhale could be heard from Jaken as she placed her fingers on the ground and bowed low, reminiscent of the prostration the imp often gave, but shaded with nuances of female grace as Kagome had taught her. Half-dried hair spilled around her shoulders and onto the grass, but she didn't move, didn't speak. Instead, she listened to the cadence of her heartbeat that echoed throughout her body, the crackling of the fire, and singing of the insects.

"What are you doing?" murmured Sesshomaru.

Lucidity pushed herself up and eased back on her heels, hands folded on her knees. "Apologizing," she said, eyes lingering on a spot near his foot. "You were right. No matter how Jaken might have provoked me, I disrespected you by going against your wishes and lashing out at him, and I...I regret it." Her gaze darted over to Jaken, whose eyes were even larger than normal and mouth wide open, jaw practically on the ground. Her lips quirked in a brief smile at the sight before disappearing. "I'm sorry, Jaken," she added. "It won't happen again." Jaken could only nod, completely and utterly dumbstruck. She turned back to Sesshomaru and bowed once more. "And thank you for saving me. I would not be alive if you hadn't acted so quickly." A fresh stab of remorse dug into her as the truth of the words sank in and she nearly pulled away at the realization of how wrapped up in her own crap she'd been to not even consider the youkai lord and what he'd done. "I'm sorry, Sesshomaru," she said.

There was no movement, no sound, from him, not even a rustle of clothing. She eventually settled back onto her heels once more, contrite and more than a little anxious. She couldn't remember the last time she felt so ashamed of her own actions. There were times when she was embarrassed at a mistake she'd made, some cultural misunderstanding or custom she had violated, and was quick to fix the grievance. But this was different. Her actions had been deliberate and showed how little regard she had for Sesshomaru. She wanted to make amends and hoped this would at least be a stepping stone in the right direction. But maybe this was a mistake, too. He hadn't said a word, not even to tell her to get lost. The longer she knelt there, the more foolish she felt. Unconsciously, she grasped hold of the ankh again, fingers tracing the familiar, reassuring pattern of the silver. She wondered if there was some other custom she forgot or didn't know, about how someone of the daiyoukai's social standing would respond to an apology. Sesshomaru had a tendency to ignore Jaken's groveling, so he was probably doing the same with hers. 

"Lucidity." 

The sound of her name sent a shock through her, yet she did nothing more than swallow and lower her arm, eyes closed. Obviously she was wrong about his ignoring her. 

"Look at me." 

Bemused and nervous and not altogether willing to meet those golden eyes, she lifted her head. Sesshomaru's stare was unwavering. She remembered how he had scrutinized her that day beneath the pear tree, studying her with a quiet intensity, even as she tried to make conversation. It wasn't until she started to become annoyed that he spoke. She wasn't annoyed now. Rather, she felt a flush creeping up her neck and a tension in her stomach. She was anxious for so many reasons and this prolonged silence as he watched made her want to bolt. And while she may not have run, she did look away, part of her wishing she could simply dismiss all this, put it from her mind and be done with it. Things had been so much easier when she had merely tolerated her traveling companions and vice versa. 

In one, fluid motion, Sesshomaru was on his feet. Startled, Lucidity leaned back, looking up at him. He said nothing as he continued to gaze down at her, expression utterly impassive, unreadable. Then, without so much as a gesture of explanation, he strode past her. She turned and saw him stop in front of the trees.

"Do not venture out on your own again after dark," he said without looking back, and disappeared into the forest.

Lucidity was stunned. This was so...anticlimactic. She looked over at Jaken for a possible explanation, but he appeared just as confused as she was. He met her gaze and gave an emphatic shrug. So taut and riddled with nerves, Lucidity suddenly felt beyond drained and let out a soft groan, resisting the urge to simply fall back on the ground and lay there until morning. She moved to claim a spot on the other side of the fire and welcomed Kirara when the tiny youkai curled up against her. Stretching out, she used the pack, cushioned by the extra clothes inside, as a pillow and crooked an arm around Kirara.

A shuffling near her head made her look over and Jaken came into view. "Before you go to sleep, I just need know if you meant everything you said." His tone was lacking in its usual sneer and she studied him a moment before nodding. "Good," he continued, "because I have a favor to ask."

Lucidity bit down a sigh. "What is it?"

"Will you teach me your language? If this sort of thing happens again, I would like to know how to read and write your words so that I can better help Sesshomaru-sama. And it will keep him from having to ask you or finding someone else to translate."

Well, that was unexpected. She glanced at the imp once more, at his earnest expression. "I may not hurt you out of respect for Sesshomaru," she said, "but that doesn't I'm going to help someone who patronizes me and accuses me of being indecent. If you stop with the insults, I'll teach you."

"Hmm...." Jaken folded his arms and leaned forward, his gaze accusing. "Did you really not mean to flaunt yourself with your clothing?"

She shook her head, at the same time amazed at how a pair of jeans and tank top could create such drama.

"And you have no interest Sesshomaru-sama?"

Red eyes filled her mind and she closed her own. "No flaunting, no interest," she murmured. "I just want to go home."

"Good," she heard him say again. "It's a deal."

She rolled onto her side, her back to the fire, while Jaken walked away. After a moment, Kirara hopped over to lay down against her stomach. Lucidity hugged her closer and peered out into the darkness. Home was where she belonged, not here. This wasn't home and there was no point in getting attached to anyone when all she wanted to do was leave and never come back, to forget everything as if it was nothing more than a bad dream.

* * *

The next morning, Lucidity awoke of her own accord to the predawn light and was drinking morning tea and eating a breakfast of dried food by the time Jaken stirred. Sesshomaru had not returned, but she could still feel him in the area, his aura a heavy blanket in the air that could never be ignored. After they broke camp, she, Jaken, and Kirara followed his trail to the edge of the forest and found him there with a grazing Ah-Un. He was peering up at the sky, clear of clouds and bright blue, but glanced over when they neared. Golden eyes swept over them and Lucidity was grateful to feel nothing more than a shadow of the reaction from last night, a feeble stirring that paled in comparison. Maybe it really was just temporary insanity or the spur of adrenaline in the moment. Either way, she was glad it had passed. And Sesshomaru did not seem inclined to linger, as he turned from them almost at once and began walking away, Ah-Un following in his wake. 

"How strange," said Jaken, who was standing near her, Staff resting against his shoulder. "I thought he intended to travel by flight the rest of the way." 

"I'm not complaining," Lucidity said and started after the daiyoukai, pack slung over her shoulder and sword at her side. Traveling by air meant riding on Ah-Un together, which she was not keen for and apparently neither was Sesshomaru. She could only assume that he still wasn't happy with her and she didn't care, apology or not. 

By the afternoon, she had pushed it from her mind. There were better things to focus on than the moods of the daiyoukai, even if he seemed to have only the one default of arrogant indifference punctuated with the occasional display of temper. For instance, she found that teaching and walking at the same time was turning out to be an interesting feat, next to impossible really when it came to writing with ink and quill. The most she could do for now was write down the alphabet for Jaken in printed capital letters, the task made easier when riding on Ah-Un, and tear the page out of her journal for the imp to keep. After that, she began with the basics of what the letters were called, the sounds they made, and so on, as she sat side-by-side with him on the back of the dragon, Kirara next to her keeping a vigil. 

"This is so confusing," he remarked after a while, staring down at the paper. "How can these things sound one way and then another? Why do your people have to make it so difficult?" 

"They did it just to mess with you, Jaken," Lucidity said with a small grin, which widened when he glowered at her. "Hey, look, this is the first lesson. Before long, it will all be second nature." 

"If you say so," muttered the imp. "So, these letters combined spell my name?" He pointed to each one in turn and in the correct order they had just gone over. 

Lucidity nodded. "Yes." 

"Hmm...so...would these be the ones for, say, Rin's name?" Again, the imp pointed. Lucidity followed the progress of his finger and was a bit surprised when he guessed right. Well, more of an educated deduction, but still! They had gone over the sounds only once. She was impressed and nodded again, which prompted Jaken to ask, "What about Sesshomaru-sama's name?" 

"Let's see.... Without seeing how his name is written in your language, I won't be as accurate, but we would start with this one." She indicated the letter and rattled off the rest. 

"Wait, that can't be right," said Jaken at once. "Shouldn't it be two of these together at the end? Those make the correct sound, don't they?" 

"You're not wrong, but I would go with this one." She pointed at the vowel. "Sometimes, but not often, there are marks that go above the letter to indicate a change in pronunciation that isn't typical of the arrangement in the letters. For Sesshomaru's name, you would mark the last letter like this." She mimed making a horizontal line. 

"There are so many rules," Jaken groaned. "How can you be certain?" 

"It's what I do," Lucidity explained. "Languages are my area of study. That's what I originally came here to do, anyway, teach mine. I'm better at writing it than most, so...." She trailed off with a shrug, not wanting to explain further. 

"It's time you put your expertise to use then." 

Sesshomaru's voice drifted over to her and Jaken. Lucidity looked up as Ah-Un came to a sudden halt and saw Sesshomaru standing in front of a large rocky hill, peering up at the structure that was overgrown with vines and moss. 

"We're here," he said. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Looks like someone has a fetish for daemon eyes! XD 
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed! More to come!


	12. Chapter 12

Lucidity had never been given a straight answer as to their first destination, though she wouldn't be surprised if Sesshomaru wanted to recover his stolen property first. So, "here" was obviously not where Kaidame was, as she had been told repeatedly that no human could reach him on foot and a trek through a forest wasn't exactly climbing Mount Everest.

Lucidity slid off of Ah-Un and approached Sesshomaru, only to stop short as she reached him. She backed away several steps and rubbed at her arms. Tilting her head back, she took in the sight of this innocent looking hill, so inconspicuous at first glance. The way it jutted out from the ground in the midst of all these trees, draped so thickly with vegetation, reminded her of the faerie hills of folklore. Yet the energy radiating off of it was no where near as pleasant as beloved children's tales.

"You can feel it?" Sesshomaru said. "The barrier that prevents me from entering?" 

She nodded and moved closer, her eyes raking over this great pile of rock and vine.

"It has given us more trouble than we care to admit," Jaken said as he and Kirara ambled over.

"I bet," Lucidity replied, frowning. "But where's the writing you need translated?"

"Here," said Sesshomaru, and he laid the flat of his palm against the stretch of smooth stone in front of them. Right before his hand touched, there was a ripple across the surface, like a pebble being dropped into a pond, shimmering outward and disrupting the tranquility. When he lowered his arm, she saw that the stone had changed. No longer smooth, but with carvings directly in the center. Letters about a foot tall were etched above and below the indentation of a circle of roughly the same circumference. The energy continued to pulse as she moved closer and Sesshomaru stepped away.

"What do you make of it?" he asked. 

She reached out a tentative hand and traced the carving of the first word, then the next. She could feel the barrier, its aura solidified in the rock and earth, completely encasing the structure and burrowing deep into the ground. And though invisible to the naked eye, she could feel the pressure of it, not unlike when submerging herself in water. But the barrier wasn't her main concern. Letting her hand drop, she glanced over at the daiyoukai. 

"Sesshomaru, I'm hoping that this is all there is," she said. 

His mouth thinned and she caught a glimpse of his brow furrowing before his expression cleared. "Why do you say that?" 

"Because...this isn't my language." 

Shock was not something she was used to seeing on the daiyoukai's face. But when his countenance broke and she saw his eyes widen with a flicker of emotion she couldn't quite place, she flinched inwardly and started to reach out, as the first impulse that seized her was to reassure him. Yet before she could speak a word, Jaken pushed his way forward and forced her aside, paper in hand.

"What are you talking about?!" Jaken exclaimed, looking between the paper and the hill. "The writing is the same." 

"Yes, it's the same alphabet, but this is a dead language," she said. "I might know-"

Without warning, Sesshomaru was at her side and the grip he had on her upper arm was painful and unexpected. "Do not play games with me," he said in a dark voice that had Jaken scrambling to stand back near Ah-Un, while Kirara hissed her displeasure. Lucidity, on the other hand, was trapped as the daiyoukai bore down on her, her heart racing, completely taken by surprise by this jarring change in his demeanor. "Can you translate it or not?" he demanded. "If I have wasted my time with you-"

"If you've wasted YOUR time?!" Lucidity shouted, anger finally overriding the fear as she tried to pull away. " _You're_ the one who dragged me all the way out here and you didn't even think to check if my language was even the right one!" Well, neither had she, but she wasn't about to be the one blamed for this. She continued to struggle, seething, and could swear her fingers were going numb from lack of circulation. "Dammit, let go of me!"

In response, he dragged her closer, his own fury written clearly over his face, mouth twisted in a scowl. "And how am I to know that you use the same markings as a dead language?" 

"Fine! There's no way you could have known, but how is this my fault?" she snapped. "Why are you getting angry at me for this? What the hell is in there that's so damn important that it has you this worked up?" 

The scowl withered into a hard frown, molten eyes fixed on her. "That is none of your concern," Sesshomaru said in a tight voice. 

"It is when you start hurting me over it! Let go already!" 

His expression never changed as he glared at Lucidity, and then finally released her, his arm falling to his side. "We're done here," he said, turning away in a flourish of hair and fur.

_"Per sacrificium ex humano sanguine revelare."_

Sesshomaru stopped.

"If you gave me a chance, I could have told you by now," she said. "My language has roots in this one. A lot of our vocabulary derives from it and I used to study the words for fun. I understand what this says." A sigh broke from her and she shook her head, her anger ebbing away. "I didn't mean to upset you. I only meant to tell you that if there is anything else that needs translating, I may have trouble with it." 

He was peering over his shoulder at her by the time she was done speaking and now came back to stand in front of her. For a heartbeat or two, he did not move or speak, simply watched her, his expression having reverted to the usual countenance of inherent superiority. Suddenly, he reached out and touched her arm, right where he had grabbed her. The movement startled Lucidity, who stiffened and looked down at the thumb caressing over her tunic, knowing that she would be sporting a bruise there later. She could barely feel it, his fingers were so light. Almost like an...but that was ridiculous. Sesshomaru didn't ever say he was-

"Next time, lead with that," he said as he lifted his hand away and folded his arms, looking back to the hillside. "Tell me what it says." 

Lucidity, dragging herself out of the whirlwind of thoughts, inhaled deeply, unsheathed the sword at her waist, and laid the blade against her hand. Sesshomaru turned his head to watch and even Jaken braved moving closer as Lucidity carefully drew her palm, the one that wasn't scarred, across the sharp edge. "Reveal by sacrifice of human blood," she said and placed her crimson-smeared palm to the circle. 

The stone burned beneath her touch. She stepped back, sheathing her sword, as the energy of the barrier surged and the stone began to glow a deep shade of purple, steadily growing brighter until it was a near blinding, white light. Heat rose from its surface, from the ground around them. The very air seemed on fire, as if the entire hillside was aflame. Lucidity just managed to catch a glimpse of the blood being swept away as if it was nothing but ash, before she had to raise an arm to her eyes and turn away. She felt Sesshomaru move next to her, the rustle of his haori along her side, and realized he was against her. He was putting an arm around her, forcing her down, using himself as a shield just as he'd done in the landslide. Jaken and Kirara took shelter beneath them, while she heard the trudging of Ah-Un's massive feet as the dragon retreated from the source of the heat. Lucidity was about to demand why they all didn't follow that example and put as much distance between themselves and this faerie hill of hell as possible when, in a single great breath, it stopped.

A bit staggering, to be honest. Lucidity had trouble finding her bearings after such a massive torrent. Not only from the heat, but the cascade of clashing energies as the barrier fractured. Fractured, but was still there, like the shattered glass of a windowpane that had yet to fall out. She stood along with Sesshomaru and they both peered back at the damage, Kirara and Jaken still beside them. For a moment, she was confused at what she was looking at, even as Sesshomaru broke away and examined the stone wall. But then her mind and eyes adjusted and she saw the patterns, the words, and her blood ran cold.

"What is this?" asked the daiyoukai.

She shook her head, only vaguely aware that he was looking at her.

"Lucidity?"

She didn't answer, still staring at the stone, at the new markings burned into the wall like crude charcoal drawings, until Sesshomaru moved in front of her and blocked the sight from view. Automatically she tilted her head back to look at him and saw the frown that pulled at his lips, the golden eyes narrowed, but not in anger.

"What is this?" he asked again. "Why does it frighten you?"

Once more, she shook her head, then walked around Sesshomaru to stand before the hill. The carvings were gone, except for the circle. This new writing stared back at her, completely different and yet equally familiar. More familiar, in a way. And it was...had to be...impossible. It just had to be! But the implication of what this meant made her knees quake, made her believe all the more that nothing here was a coincidence. Somehow, someway, everything that had happened to her, maybe to Sesshomaru as well...none of it was by accident or good fortune. This was a design by some unknown force making them its damn puppets!

"You will answer me. Now!" came the sharp, impatient voice behind her.

"Who did this?" she murmured. "Who created this barrier? Were they youkai or human?"

"If I knew, do you not think the one to cause me such trouble would already be dead?"

Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath. She hadn't really expected an answer, but she'd had to ask. It was obvious enough to her that if Sesshomaru knew, she never would have been brought here. Hell, he never would have come to her in the village. No quest to set out on. No barriers to break. No men to kill. And no secrets staring her in the face, threatening to be revealed.

"Eeto...Sesshomaru-sama?" It was Jaken, edging his way over to the daiyoukai, Staff clasped in both hands. "What are we to do now? Is the barrier not weakened? Perhaps you can use Bakusaiga again, but with better results this time."

"A method I am doubtful of," replied Sesshomaru. "But I will test the barrier. Lucidity, if you have nothing further to offer, step aside."

She could do that. She probably should do that. It was possible to lie, after all, and claim that she could do nothing more to help. But the mere thought of deceiving him left a sour taste in her mouth. Myoga had said that Sesshomaru was many things, but a liar was not one of them, which meant he had a semblance of honor and she didn't want to betray that.

Footsteps warned her of his approach; he probably ready to tear her out of his way. "Wait," was all she said, and heard the footsteps stop. She cradled her injured hand against her chest and pressed her thumb into the cut, wincing as more blood was drawn. "These are instructions." Two fingers were dipped into the blood. "'Here the crescent moon lies,'" she began, reading aloud the runes. "'Enter by the four.'" She placed her fingers onto the lower left portion of the circle and drew a line upwards diagonally. "'And of the fifth.'" More blood to coat her fingers and she drew several more lines. "'Encircle and may She grant you passage.'" Lucidity drew a circle around the five-pointed star, using the indentation as the outline, knowing now what it was ultimately designed for.

The wall began to shudder. But there was no bright glow, no unbearable heat. Dirt and rocks were dislodged as, with a deep echo, the wall split apart, the left half taking with it the five-pointed star, and revealed a passage large enough for two to walk abreast. Lucidity, crouched down and wiping her hands clean on the grass as best she could, looked up at Sesshomaru, who was staring straight ahead at the dark opening.

"You first," she said.

A quick glance was the only response she received in return, and then he went straight through. The moment he was over the threshold, fire erupted along the wall of the passage and disappeared into its depths. Lucidity gave a start and nearly lost her balance. Yet with all the insane crap she'd seen, a fire magically springing into being was rather tame and her hesitation was brief before she followed. Closer now, she could smell the oil that filled a trough-like impression in the wall that must have run the entire length of it. 

"Wait for me!" Jaken shouted, sprinting after them.

A sudden burst of light and Jaken's gasp had her spinning around. The imp was picking himself up off the ground where he had been shoved back, shaking his head.

"I can't get in!" came his unnecessary wail. Kirara, too, came forward and pawed at the entrance, only for the barrier to flare white before fading. Jaken looked positively devastated. "Sesshomaru-sama, why won't the barrier let us pass?"

Sesshomaru didn't say anything, but peered over at Lucidity, who held up her hands, one scarred and one bloodied. "Don't look at me," she said. "Apparently I'm just a code breaker; I don't know anything about this barrier, other than it makes my skin crawl."

Sesshomaru looked back to Jaken. "Stay here," he ordered, then started down the passage.

"Wait! Sesshomaru-sama! Don't leave me! I want to help."

"I don't know what you're upset about," Lucidity muttered, and Jaken turned large, tear-filled eyes up at her. "I don't really fancy going down there."

Sesshomaru's voice echoed up to her. "You are needed here, Lucidity. Come."

She heaved a sigh and trudged after the daiyoukai. "Would it kill you to say 'please' every once in a while?" she muttered, not the least bit surprised when he gave no answer. She decided to focus her attention to their surroundings, but there really wasn't much to see. The ceiling, walls, and floor all bore the semblance of a tunnel, except that the ground looked worn, as if it had been trodden upon too many times. The fire illuminated the area enough that she was reassured that there were no cobwebs or bats or insanely large spiders. No holes either for blow darts or hidden spikes. No raider of tombs or archaeology professor here. But then she heard the grinding sound of stone against stone and felt a rush of air that caused the flames to flicker.

"[Oh shit,]" Lucidity said, stopping dead in her tracks. "Did that just close up on us?"

"A matter you needn't concern yourself with," Sesshomaru replied without breaking stride.

She hurried after him. "And why exactly shouldn't I? We could die down here-"

"I won't allow it."

She shook her head in exasperated disbelief. "Too stubborn to die, are you?"

"Yes."

Despite the circumstances, his straight, matter-of-fact tone had her chuckling.

"Why were you afraid back there?"

Her mirth evaporated. The tension that had eased returned with an iron grip on her insides, to the point where she felt rather ill. She didn't want to lie; she wasn't that good at it, anyway, and didn't doubt that Sesshomaru would see through any pitiful attempts. But she wasn't about to answer his question either. "You have your secrets and I have mine," she said flatly.

"If we are successful, you will know my reason for coming here. I would know the reason for your fear."

"No."

"Lucidity-"

She stopped. So did he. "Don't, Sesshomaru," she said, her voice hard, not angry, but deadly serious. "Don't ask me. Ever."

He held her gaze a moment, then turned away. "As you wish."

They continued along the passage in silence. The path beneath their feet was steadily sloping downward, to the point where Lucidity fell back and had to hold her arms out for balance until it evened out, though Sesshomaru didn't appear to have any difficulty. Typical. And what was with him, anyway, asking a personal question like that? He'd never done it before. Their conversation the previous night was more in depth than was common, but at the same time she could understand his curiosity. And she could understand the reason when he first asked why the runes frightened her. It had delayed getting them in here and he hadn't been happy about it. But they were in, so he shouldn't care. So, why wasn't that the case? Maybe it was. Maybe he was merely curious and she was overthinking the matter. Wouldn't be a first. Maybe-

"Oof!" Lucidity grunted as she staggered back, rubbing her face from where she'd run into Sesshomaru's armor, having barely missed being nicked by the spiked pauldron. Damn, that hurt, and was dangerous to boot. Why had he stopped like that? She moved around him and found another wall of stone blocking their path. Ah, that was a good reason. She saw that the door was the same as the other, a circle at the center and more writing. Only a few words this time.

 _"De sanguine lunae,"_ she read aloud at once, eager to ignore her blundering misstep. "Blood of the moon. Does that mean anything to you?" She glanced up at Sesshomaru, who looked back, and her eyes darted up to his forehead. The first line of the runes hadn't made sense to her, as she'd been more focused on the rest that were of more help, but she immediately realized that the answer was literally staring her in the face. "Your blood, then?" she suggested.

"I was of similar mind," said Sesshomaru, pressing a palm to the circle; she noticed the blood covered claws and saw the red stain when he pulled his hand away. This time there was no blinding light. Rather, the door simply slid open, after much rattling and creaking, breaking apart to reveal...a niche. Truly nothing more than a shallow dip in the wall, containing a single object. At first glance, Lucidity believed it was an intricately carved and decorated vase that Sesshomaru picked up by the handle, but upon closer inspection she realized it was an urn.

 _That_ was what they were here for? She sure as hell could relate to wanting the ashes of a loved one, but the measures Sesshomaru had gone to were insane! Was this bit of pottery really what he kept losing his cool over? She resisted the urge to rub at her arm, quite certain she was going to have a hand print there for a few days, as Sesshomaru examined the urn, his eyes darting over the characters painted around the top. She wasn't as familiar with all the characters, but thought she glimpsed one that mentioned binding. Right when she was about to ask, Sesshomaru covered the writing with his injured hand and opened the urn.

Energy, pure and luminous, poured out, arching high before spilling onto the ground. It rose, expanding, taking shape. The glow diminished and Lucidity was staring at a woman, who was standing serenely in their midst, dressed in a purple and white kimono draped with fur. Her coloring, her markings, had questions exploding in Lucidity's mind, yet she couldn't find her voice as the woman's golden gaze moved between them.

Sesshomaru let the empty urn drop to the ground. "Hello, Mother," he said.

Lucidity's jaw dropped.

"Sesshomaru, I was beginning to wonder if you even cared that I was missing," the lady youkai said, painted lips curving into a smile. "And what have you brought with you?"

Lucidity fought the impulse to back away as Sesshomaru's mother approached her, even more so when she grabbed her by the chin and forced her head up, tilting her face to the light.

"I have never seen a human like you before. What are you doing with my son?"

"Er..." was about the only coherent sound she could make. She was just too floored to be standing face-to-face with the woman who had given birth to the youkai lord standing not five feet away, almost a perfect image of his mother, right down to the cold eyes. And there didn't seem to be a year's difference in age between them. Just how long did his kind live?

"Not a very intelligent human, this one," the lady youkai remarked, peering over at Sesshomaru. "I think I prefer the other ones who accompanied you before."

Snapping back to herself, Lucidity scowled and jerked free of the delicate grip. The lady youkai looked at her with renewed interest, mouth forming a little O, and then smoothing into a smile.

"Spirited thing, aren't you?" she said.

Lucidity opened her mouth, a retort on the tip of her tongue-

"Do you know who trapped you down here, Mother?" Sesshomaru cut in.

"Oh? I was hoping you could tell me," she replied. "An embarrassing thing to be locked inside a prison. I suppose we will have to discover the culprit's identity together."

"A matter I will to tend to on my own," said Sesshomaru.

His mother smiled. "If that is your wish, but do not think I will ignore this. I intend to sink my teeth into the ones who dared trap me. Hmm...." She looked around the passage, apparently taking it in for the first time. "Where are we?"

"Sealed underground," he answered.

The lady youkai gave a haughty, dainty snort. "Sealed, you say? Let's change that, shall we? Come."

Lucidity was starting to see a greater family resemblance. At least Sesshomaru never seized her by the chin; it had been pretty tempting to bite his mother when she did, well aware of how well that would go over.  But everything made sense now, Lucidity thought as she followed mother and son back up the passage. Sesshomaru was right; she knew the reason, what was so important for him to press so hard and become so easily angered, and couldn't really blame him for his outbursts. Yet she could still feel the dull ache in her arm. Maybe a little blame, she amended.

"Lucidity."

She looked up at Sesshomaru and was taken aback to find that they'd reached the exit without her noticing. And the door was, indeed, sealed. Sesshomaru and his mother stood in front of it, blocking most of the stone from view. But when Lucidity walked up, Sesshomaru moved aside and his mother, after a quick glance between them, did the same.

"I see," Lucidity heard her say. "She understands this language."

"She is not without her use," replied Sesshomaru.

"[Asshole,]" Lucidity muttered as she yanked on the vines that had fallen down and were covering the words on the stone.

"What was that?" asked the lady youkai.

"I don't care to know," was his response.

With a rough pull that also helped to work out her frustration, the vines gave and Lucidity dropped them onto the ground, then brushed the dust from the stone, frowning at the words. " _Liberum mortis_ ," she read. "Damn."

"What is it?" asked the youkai lord.

"The first word is...." She thought for a moment through the various translations. "Liberate or freedom...freedom in, I think. The second I'm not so sure about...."

"Must we bother these scratches?" the lady youkai demanded.

"The barrier is too powerful; Lucidity's help is necessary."

At least he could admit to that in front of mummy dearest, she thought to herself.

"Human, are you sure you know what you're doing?"

The question had Lucidity turning around, frowning at the woman. "I got your son this far, haven't I? And I sure as hell don't want to be stuck down here with the two of you, so stop distracting me and let me think."

Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed, but his mother smiled, albeit none too kindly. Yeah, Lucidity definitely didn't want to be trapped here with these two. She leaned back against the wall, peering at the ground in the hopes of ignoring the daiyoukai. Her fingers tapped against the stone as she rolled the word through her head. _Mortis_ , _mortis_. Sounded like _mori_ from the phrase _memento mori_ , which was.... Dammit! There was even a song she knew with that title, but she'd never bothered looking up that translation. One little word. That was all she needed. She shook her head, closing her eyes, repeating the word again and again through her head, until a detail slid into place. It actually sounded like a name, from that family who had a living hand as a pet called Thing. Their whole world was filled with all that was dark, rotting, and dead. And the name was similar to other words that were also related to....

"Ah, it means death," she said aloud. For the briefest moment, she experienced relief, even a sense of pride at showing the lady youkai that she was, indeed, capable. And then the moment ended as the full impact of comprehension hit her and her head snapped up. Terror rose inside like a corrupting beast that turned the world icy and cold. Lucidity met the twin gazes of the daiyoukai across from her, took in Sesshomaru's frown and his mother's surprise. Did they know? Did they understand? She saw those painted lips spread into a delighted smile and pressed herself hard against the stone. Not daring to speak or breathe or even blink, she began to edge away. But she must have blinked, because the lady youkai was suddenly in front of her, touching a claw-tipped hand to her face.

"I was wrong," she said. "You _are_ an intelligent one, Lucidity. You have my gratitude."

Lucidity tried to pull free and cast a wild gaze in Sesshomaru's direction, pleading for all she was worth without saying a word. She saw the youkai lord moving forward, his lips parting, then his eyes flew open wide, and in the same breath, Lucidity felt a pain, an alien pressure near her sternum that did not belong, almost as if she shouldn't be able to breathe, even though she still drew in lungfuls of air. She peered down and didn't quite comprehend what was happening. She knew what she was seeing, but it didn't make any sense to her. There was an arm inside her chest, but...how...why?

She couldn't understand fast enough. Her vision was beginning to fog, and she felt herself slide down the wall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter I have been looking forward to for weeks, where you finally get some answers, but a few more questions. I know it's not some crazy Gaelic shit, but I'm curious who guessed the language or what was down there that Sesshomaru wanted back so badly? Also, what a bitch, huh? Just shoving a hand in Lucidity's chest like that. Rude! XD


	13. Chapter 13

"That wasn't necessary, Mother," Sesshomaru said as Lucidity crumpled at the woman's feet. The sight filled him with disgust

"You know as well as I that it was," his mother replied, examining her blood coated arm with vague interest. "'Freedom in death' was the key. Your human understood. Why do you think she was so afraid?"

Sesshomaru did not respond. The door was parting. His mother had already stepped outside to Jaken's cries of welcome and relief. Sesshomaru crouched and gathered Lucidity into his arms, finding that it was difficult to ignore how limp and unresponsive she was in his grasp. The front of her clothing was soaked crimson and he could see the gaping, fatal wound beneath the torn fabric. His jaw worked as he carried her out of the passage, listening to the door grind shut behind him. When he glanced back, naught but smooth stone greeted him. He could hear Jaken talking, asking what had happened, but did not look around until a growl reached his ears and he felt a burst of energy. The two-tailed youkai was in its full form, muscles bunched and ready to pounce. But when the youkai sprang at his mother, a simple blow to the head from her knocked it away and left it dazed on the ground.

"It appears as if your pet is unhappy with me," his mother remarked.

"Lucidity's blood is on your hands; she knows you killed her," he said shortly.

The golden gaze cast his way was appraising and calculating. "Are _you_ unhappy, Sesshomaru?"  

He fixed his mother with an icy stare that would leave no room for doubt as to his answer. "Her life was not yours to take." 

"Oh? Would you have done it for me? Surely you are aware that the only choice in the matter was which one of us would kill your human?" 

"That was not your decision to make!" he said, a growl in his voice.

His mother smiled. "Is that so? My, my, all this fuss over a mortal female. I do not understand you at times." 

"The human and I have an arrangement; I will not have you breaking my word to her." 

"That is not like you, Sesshomaru, to make deals with humans." 

"A matter that would not be necessary if you hadn't allowed yourself to be captured. And I will return you to that prison myself if you do not remedy what you have done, Mother." 

Anger flashed across the woman's face, but soon settled into a hard frown as she closed her eyes. "What a son to be cursed with," she lamented. "To choose a human over his own mother. Fine! Put her down and I will see to the task." 

Sesshomaru laid Lucidity on the grass and Kirara, having recovered from the attack, padded over to nudge her nose against the motionless woman. A growl rose from the youkai when his mother knelt and placed the Meido Stone around Lucidity's neck. "Be still, you beast. Or do you not want the human brought back?" she snapped, and Kirara quieted as the Stone began to glow. 

"What happened, my lord?" asked Jaken, who had come to stand beside his master. "Why did she have to die?"

Sesshomaru didn't answer. His focus was on Lucidity. A fist was held tight at his side and he could feel the discomfort of the self-inflicted wounds on his palm. He remembered another time, another wound on his hand that Lucidity had offered medicine for. Pointless, it had been, as was this sudden and violent death. She did not deserve it. The thought gave him pause, but he did not have time to consider it. The Meido Stone had grown quiet. He saw Lucidity's chest rise as she drew in a breath and promptly began to cough, while his mother replaced the Stone around her own neck and stood to walk away. 

Lucidity pushed herself up, appearing for all the world as if she'd been awakened from a nap, disoriented and confused. She soon shook her head and focused her attention onto Sesshomaru before looking over at his mother, then down at herself. He saw the shock fill her face, the dawning realization, and he caught the scent of her ripe fear. She was on her feet, staggering, and Kirara pushed her head beneath an arm, helping the woman keep her balance. Blue eyes continued to dart between the two daiyoukai before coming to rest on the swords at Sesshomaru's waist, then up to his face.

"How do you fair?" he asked. 

Lucidity was pale as she tried to find her voice. "She...she...did she...? Was I...?" 

"Yes, you were dead." It was his mother who spoke. "And yes, I killed you. An unfortunate necessity, one my son found most displeasing. He even threatened to seal me away again. Can you imagine? Who are you to inspire him to such degrees, girl? Come, tell me. I want to know." 

Like a coin being flipped, Sesshomaru saw Lucidity's shock shatter into unbridled rage. He expected as much, but it did not make it any less of an aggravation when he was forced to step between the females. He seized Lucidity by her wrist as she went to unsheathe her sword and she snapped that blazing, blue gaze onto him. "Do not be so foolish," he said. "You will only make a nuisance of yourself if you try to attack her." 

"Get out of my way!" she shouted, wild with fury, twisting her arm, attempting to wrench free. She began to curse at him, or so he assumed, speaking as she was in her native tongue. 

"Oh my, she really does have spirit!" his mother exclaimed, a lilt to her voice that only served to further infuriate Lucidity. He had never seen her so maddened, not even on the cliff when she had pounded a fist against his chest. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes bright, and she bared her teeth like a common animal, screaming words he did not understand. He could feel the flare of her temper, churning through the aroma of fear, making it into something warm and rich, not sweeter, but stronger, more than, and it brought a trickling growl from his throat, caused him to...forget himself, if only momentarily.

"Let go of me, Sesshomaru! LET GO!"

The demands brought his mind to the forefront and he glared down at Lucidity, squeezing her wrist until she cried out in pain, bringing a halt to her struggles, at least for now. "Control yourself, woman," he ordered. "You will not-" 

"To hell with that!" she yelled, attempting to pry his hand loose, as though she truly believed she could break the grip of a daiyoukai. "Gods be damned! She killed me! She fucking KILLED me!"

"An outcome I did not intend for," he told her, even as she scowled her disbelief at him. "I would not have allowed it if I'd known what she was going to do. There was no reason for her to dispatch you so crudely."

"I have to disagree."

Sesshomaru closed his eyes at his mother's voice.

"I could have just as easily broken her neck. Useful though she might be, she's irritating and there was a point to be made. She needed to understand the purpose she served. Her death was a temporary thing, really, Sesshomaru. I believed you might bring her back. Yet I have to admit, I never imagined you would make the demand of me."

"That is enough, Mother," he said, opening his eyes, right as a fist connected with his jaw. He felt the impact of the weak blow resonate through him, a jolt in his system that he had not been expecting, and one that was enough to snap his head to the side. Lucidity's heavy panting echoed beside him and he heard the astonished gasp from Jaken and a soft exclamation of surprise from his mother. Slowly, he turned his head, his eyes carefully scanning over his would-be assailant, at how she labored for each breath of air, how she trembled, at the expression on her face filled with such rage and anguish. That pain. He could smell the tears on her, though none were visible. What did she have to weep for? And why would she attack him? 

Finally, he granted her wish and let her wrist fall from his grasp. She stumbled back and caught herself on Kirara, arms wrapping around the youkai's neck. Still shaking, she raised a hand, as though hoping to ward him off. "You stay the hell away from me, Sesshomaru," she whispered. "Don't come anywhere near me, not ever." She was afraid, he realized. Of him. 

The daiyoukai remained silent and impassive as Lucidity flung herself onto Kirara's back, whispered a command, and the youkai took to the sky with a snarl that warned none to follow. He watched the woman bury her face into the fur, his lips pulling down at the corners, and felt a sense of bitterness that left him with the desire to destroy something with an unrestrained violence.

His mother's sigh was sudden and heavy. "It's for the best," she said. "Humans and youkai do not belong together. Our worlds are too different, and humans are such fragile things; none can survive being with our kind. Your father knew this and still went to great measures to protect Izayoi. Yet his Fangs only delay the inevitable."

A thought was beginning to form in his mind, prompting him to peer over at his mother; after this, however, he did not wish to look upon her for some time. "What are you saying?" 

She smiled, her expression serene. There was nothing vindictive that he could see, no trace of the cruelty that had so casually been directed towards Lucidity. "If you care for that human, Sesshomaru, you should do as she wishes and keep your distance. You will bring her nothing but suffering."

The absurdity of the statement was coupled with an abrupt understanding. "You deliberately drove her away," he said.

"Me?" his mother replied with an air of innocence. "I'm certain she made that choice on her own, as well as her decision to lash out at you. And it will be your choice to follow her, regardless of what I say." She gathered her furs closer around herself. "I could not have predicated your response to her death, but would have you know that I intended to use the Meido Stone without the need for threats. I ended your human's life so that we might be free of that wretched prison. A fair trade, wouldn't you agree?" 

Sesshomaru merely looked at her, silence the only answer he would grace her with. 

"Oh, very well," she huffed. "I see that my presence is no longer wanted. And I believe I have some vermin to track down and kill. Do what you will, Sesshomaru." Her form began to glow, and then coalesced into a sphere of energy that shot upward with an indignant anger, disappearing into the clouds overhead and fading from view.

Do what he will. 

"What now, my lord?" Jaken asked. "Where shall we go?" 

He didn't know. He, Sesshomaru, could not decide. Doubt rooted him where he stood. The logical choice was obvious. Lucidity had fulfilled her part of their bargain and did not want his help. Though it was foolish and impulsive on her part, she was free to leave; he had no grounds to stop her. Yet the thought of her on her own after being brought back by the Meido Stone, covered in fresh blood, and with mediocre protection made him, in no uncertain terms, uneasy. He did not want to leave her as she was, the perfect prey for others. Perhaps he might follow at a distance and ensure that she reached the village safely. No, he thought. What a ridiculous notion. He had more important concerns than the life of a single human. And she would know he was there, ever aware of his presence as she was, and would not be happy. He should leave her to do as she liked, just as his mother had done with him. And yet he did not move. Claws bit into his palm as his frustration mounted. And continued to mount until it manifested into a raw energy that had Jaken rapidly backing away as the daiyoukai's desire to cause complete and utter destruction rose to an unprecedented degree. To lose control, to unleash himself, had never been so tempting. 

If he cared.... Damn that woman. Damn them both.

A searing pain in his hand was what ultimately spared the surrounding forest and its inhabitants his wrath. His expanding aura broke with a thought as he growled under his breath and lifted his palm up to examine. The normally white scar of the seven-pointed star was a deep scarlet and burned as if recently pulled from a fire. Yet before he could even begin to contemplate the meaning of it, a pulse of power not his own surged from the ground and latched onto him. He was brought to a knee before he realized what was happening. Comprehension was in some vague corner of his mind as his spine bowed under the pressure of the unknown entity. Was this how it had been for Lucidity, this overwhelming presence that bore down, left him helpless, at its mercy? He could not move for the sheer strength of it, whatever _it_ was. He could hear Jaken, shouting words that were nothing more than incoherent noises, as the power ripped the breath from his body and filled his head with a pounding agony that threatened to split his skull apart. Only one clear thought echoed in the chaos, a thought not his own: 

_Find her!_

His inhale was sharp, bringing a pain of fresh air to his lungs as the entity released its hold. As the first time, his awareness returned by slow degrees. He found himself on his knees, one hand buried in his hair, the other digging claws into the ground. His muscles ached, his pulse raced, and the tension that seized him would not leave. He did not know what the entity was or how it could so easily overpower him, as though he were nothing but an insect crawling over its skin. But he did know that it meant to warn, not harm, just as Lucidity had described. Albeit, this warning carried with it the impression of furious impatience, as the pain in his temple could attest. 

"Sesshomaru-sama, are you all right? Please answer me! What happened?! What attacked you?" 

Ignoring Jaken, the daiyoukai pushed himself to his feet and tore through the forest, the world falling into a blur of shape and color. Lucidity's trail was a simple thing to follow, thick with the scent of her blood. She could not be far. Even on the back of Kirara, not enough time had passed to cover much ground. He did not know if the entity could be trusted, but he could not ignore the warning, the danger he sensed. The danger Lucidity was in. He followed her scent to the edge of the forest when, without warning, he lost it. He spun about, coming to a halt, hair and fur flying around him, as he scanned the terrain, for any sign, any smell, but there was nothing, no trace. The trail ended here. How was it possible? What manner of beast could attack her and leave nothing behind? And, more to the point, how could he find her if there was nothing to follow? 

He turned on the spot, searching for something, anything that might provide an answer. As he faced the mountains in the west, a sharp pang in his temple brought a grunt to his lips and he pressed the heel of his palm against the side of his head. At the same time, a near paralyzing sense of certainty filled him and again came the disembodied presence of the entity, little more than a caress along his skin. West. That was where he needed to search. A trap could be awaiting him. Yet, with Lucidity missing, the choice was removed for him. 

"Sesshomaru-sama!" 

Jaken's shout was accompanied by the arrival of Ah-Un, gliding above the trees. Jaken sat astride the dragon, that, until this moment, had disappeared in the wake of breaking barriers. Barriers, Sesshomaru thought. Was that how Lucidity had disappeared? Was she trapped behind a barrier? That was how the hanyou, Naraku, had hidden himself, scent and aura altogether. Sesshomaru glanced again at the mountains and felt a stronger, more painful ache in his temple and gritted his teeth. 

"What is it, my lord?" asked the imp. "Has something happened?" 

"Lucidity has been taken," he said.

"What?! By whom? How do you know? Wait! Where are you going? Wait for me, my lord!"

But Sesshomaru had already taken to air, his form that of a spherical light, racing towards the mountains.

* * *

"Stop trying our patience, girl. We know your kind travel in packs. You will tell us where the rest of your people are." 

"No matter how many times you ask, the answer isn't going to change. The only people I know are the villagers I've been staying with. I have no people of my own!" 

"Liar!" 

The shout was coupled with a hard backhand across her face. Lucidity, already on her knees, did not fall as far as she had the first time he'd struck her when she'd been standing, but her bleeding lip did bleed some more. She pushed herself up, favoring one hand over the other because the scar on her palm had, for some inexplicable reason, decided to act up not long after she'd been set upon by these two. She couldn't begin to imagine the reason, but she had some more pressing concerns to deal with at the moment.

Fingers laced themselves into her hair and she grunted when her head was yanked back, forcing her to peer up at her assailant. Tall and lithe, he had a feral look about him with long, unkempt hair, yellow eyes with slits for pupils, and scales down the sides his face and neck and the top of his hands. When he snarled, he revealed a pair of elongated canines that unfolded from the roof of his mouth. 

"Until you arrived, we knew of no human who could break the seals of the barrier," the viper said. "As far as our information goes, your people should be on the other side of the ocean. And yet here you are, with our enemy, and get through our barriers as if it is a child's game to you. But we know how your kind value safety in numbers, especially the women. We will find your people one way or another. It will be much faster for all of us-and a quicker, less painful death for you-if you just tell us what we want to know."

Panting, her heart threatening to burst from her chest, Lucidity swallowed down the rising panic, barely keeping a grip on her fear as it was. "What...what you want to hear and the reality of it are two different things," she replied. "I did not come to your land of my own free will. I have no one here." The hand tightened in her hair before she was tossed away, landing hard on her back, head bouncing against the ground. She gritted her teeth against the pain and rolled onto her side, legs drawn up, as though she would somehow be less vulnerable in this position.

"Maybe she's telling the truth, Hebi," said the other viper, who was leaning against a tree and watching the interaction, heavily scarred and muscled arms folded, his large build the exact opposite of his slender companion. "She wouldn't be the first to be banished." 

"But the first to be banished to our country at the worst possible time?" countered the first. "That vault was designed to hold those blasted Inu youkai for eternity. Having Sesshomaru chase his tail trying to get to his mother was supposed to keep him off our track until we were able to seal him away, too. But because of her interference, we have a serious problem on our hands. She must have been sent here." 

"Yeah, you're probably right. The Clan Elders are not going to be happy about this. And they'll want to question the human, too, so we can't kill her yet." 

"But we can make her hurt." 

Lucidity's stomach churned as the viper, Hebi, seized her by the arm and dragged her upright. Staggering on her feet, she managed to keep her balance, even as he wrenched her head back a second time by the hair. "We pumped your nekomata full of venom when we grabbed you," he said. "If its not dead yet, it will be soon. But do you know we can control the amount of venom we release?" 

"Dry bite," she grunted. "Not exactly a revelation." 

"Hmph, you're a well informed human, if not a stupid one," he said with a dark chuckle, pulling on the neck of her tunic until she heard the sound of tearing fabric. "And what are these?" Another pull and she felt the necklaces snap off. Hebi lifted the pendants high enough for her to see and her heart skipped.

She quickly reached for the dangling pieces of silver. "Don't! They're just bits of jewelry." 

He snorted. "Unlikely. What magic are they for?" 

"None! Personal! They only represent eternal life and the Goddess. NO!" Lucidity stared, wide eyed, a cold pit dropping into her stomach, as the necklaces were flung away, the ankh and female figure disappearing from view. 

"Doesn't matter. None of your magic will be of help to you," the viper growled and dragged her against him. "I wonder if a gaijin tastes as exotic as the Elders say." 

She was crying out, agony lacing through her, before she was consciously aware of the fangs in her throat. Knowing well the effort was futile, it didn't stop her from struggling in his grasp, trying to kick and punch as any sane person would. But the youkai paid her no more heed than if she were a child. He did little beyond pinning her wrists behind her back with one hand, the other still buried in her hair, keeping her throat bare and open to him. She was no threat to him, to either of them, and they all knew it; they hadn't even relieved her of the sword at her waist, the danger she posed to them was that insignificant. He bit harder, his fangs slid in deeper, and she cried out again, hearing only laughter in return. Her heart pumped furiously inside her chest, even as she felt warm blood seep down her neck and into the tunic. So much blood to be shed today, all of it hers. Her head was starting to swim. It was hopeless, she found herself thinking. No one knew where she was, that she was in trouble. She'd told him to stay away. She'd meant it. And now this. Would there be no end to the madness that had become her life? Would it stop only when she died, for good this time? 

"Hebi! HEBI!" 

The voice of the other viper caught her attention at once. She could hear the alarm ringing in each syllable and felt the fangs being extracted. She winced, just as Hebi swore. "How the hell did he find us?!" 

Her eyes, which had been closed, slid open. For a moment, she couldn't focus and blinked furiously until her vision cleared. There, floating above them, suspended by his own energy- 

"Sesshomaru!" 

Hebi slapped a hand over her mouth, still clutching at her wrists, and snarled several colorful death threats at her. At the same time, he kept his gaze on the daiyoukai, not daring to look away. Something was wrong, Lucidity realized. Sesshomaru wasn't attacking. He wasn't even looking in their direction. Rather he was scanning the area, turning about, apparently searching. But...why? What was going on? Why couldn't he see them?! 

"He can't know that we're here, otherwise we'd be dead by now," said the larger viper. 

"Yeah," Hebi replied. "Must have been dumb luck that brought him this far."

A shadow swooped over the ground and Lucidity turned her head, spotting Ah-Un and Jaken heading this way, the latter of whom was holding his Staff, along with something small and yellow on his lap. "Sesshomaru-sama, I found Kirara," Jaken was saying. "It looks like she's been bitten and she isn't waking up." 

"She smells of venom," said the daiyoukai. 

"Venom? Do you think this could be the work of the Viper Clan? Is it possible?" 

There was no answer from Sesshomaru, who was still drifting overhead, still searching. 

"Shit. Is it holding, Hebi?" 

Lucidity didn't understand what was meant by that, until Hebi extracted something beneath the neck of his armor. Hanging by a chain was a crystal, gently pulsating every few moments. The light inside its depths was a soft shade of purple and reminded her of another energy of a similar color, before it grew white hot. She looked from the crystal to Sesshomaru and back again, comprehension dawning like a chilling cascade of water. 

"Yeah, yeah, it's holding," Hebi muttered. "We should stay put until he gives up and leaves." 

"Why he hasn't left yet, I don't know," remarked the other viper. "He shouldn't be able to see or even smell us, right? Are you sure you have it set up correctly?" 

"Of course I'm sure!" Hebi snapped. "You just said it yourself: we'd be dead by now if he knew." 

"Yeah, but what if he has our scent and that's why he hasn't left? Double check it, Hebi, just in case."

"I don't need to double check a damn thing. Haven't I covered up our tracks this far? They had no idea we were watching them at the vault. Sesshomaru wasn't aware of us going after the human. He-"

"Then why is he here now?!"

"How should I know? But he can't see us, Mamushi, so shut the hell up already!"

The vipers really didn't believe she was a threat. Not even for a moment did it cross their minds. Far more concerned with the daiyoukai overhead, they didn't stop to think about letting their guard down around a human. As Hebi and Mamushi argued back and forth, while keeping Sesshomaru in their sight, Lucidity felt Hebi's grip on her wrists slacken. One arm was free and he was still yelling at Mamushi. In all honesty, Lucidity was aware that she didn't stand a chance against a youkai, let alone two. She never would have acted so rashly if it wasn't for the fact that help was right there, just within reach. And so she took this brief opening, knowing it might cost her if she did, knowing it would most definitely cost her if she didn't. It was a gamble, with her own life, and she took it.

Lucidity's fingers closed over the crystal before Hebi registered the movement. And as he'd done with her necklaces, she snapped the chain with a quick jerk. He was reaching for her, seizing her arm, claws biting into the skin. She flung the crystal onto the ground and brought the heel of her boot down, felt the fragile piece crack, saw the wild, enraged fear on the viper's face, his arm rising, and then felt the hard blow to the side of her head, his shrill voice echoing in her ears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. So, Sesshomaru's mom was actually kinda fun to write. I had to re-watch the one episode she appeared in to get a better feel for her. She seems more playful than Sesshomaru, but still quite a bitch, creating all that trouble to teach her son a lesson.
> 
> And look! Our first glimpse of the Viper Clan. For some reason, I don't think these two will last very long, though.


	14. Chapter 14

"YOU STUPID BITCH!"

The scream accompanied a rush of scents in the wake of the barrier shattering, just in time for Sesshomaru to witness one of the two youkai knock Lucidity to the ground. Then they were running, leaving her behind while attempting to flee with their lives, lives that were now his to claim, though slow, pathetic, belly-crawling beasts they might have been. Sesshomaru's descent was swift, as was his execution of the smaller youkai. Head and body fell separately as he landed before the second one, a green tendril of energy shooting outward. The Whip wrapped around the thick throat and, with a simple tug, Sesshomaru brought the youkai to his knees. He noted the scales, the eyes, and the unmistakable smell of serpent, but his attention was diverted when Ah-Un landed next to Lucidity and Jaken jumped down, hurrying over to examine her. 

"Does she live?" Sesshomaru asked.

Jaken carefully rolled the woman onto her back. "Yes, my lord, but she's unconscious."

Holding the Whip taut, Sesshomaru peered back at the one at his feet. "You are of the Viper Clan. What interest could you have in this human?"

The viper, pulling fruitlessly at the Whip, grimaced, then sneered. "If I tell you, will I live?"

"Your life is of little consequence to me. It makes no difference if you die here a fool or leave a coward," said Sesshomaru. "The choice is yours." The Whip contracted as he spoke and the viper opened his mouth, eyes bulging, trying to breathe through his blocked windpipe. "Will you tell me what I want to know?" The answer was an immediate, vigorous nod. The Whip relaxed and the viper took in great gulps of air.

"We were sent out here to guard the vault," he was quick to say, glancing at his fallen companion. "We never expected you to find a way to break through the barrier. It was created using techniques and languages of a people from a country far from ours. After your father banished our clan, some of the Elders traveled in search of ways to defeat him, across seas, to new worlds, and brought back magic unheard of. The Elders had been planning their revenge for years, but were forced into action because-"

"I know the reason that you were driven from your lands," Sesshomaru cut in. "I want to know what need you have of this woman."

"She is the only one in this country who is capable of breaking the seals into the vault. But her people are scattered, hunted. The chance that she is here, alone, without her people for protection, is unimaginable, should be impossible. But here she is and we knew the Elders would want her, at least to interrogate, maybe use."

Sesshomaru took a moment to consider this information, its implications, and at the same time glanced over again at Jaken, who was clumsily trying to tend to Lucidity. Eventually, he peered back at the viper and asked what should have been his first question, the more pressing concern: "Where is the rest of your wretched tribe?" 

"North of here, near the boundary of our borders," he answered at once. No hesitation. No thought of loyalty or pride, only a desperation to save himself. Truly a creature of little worth. 

The Whip tightened, pulled, and the viper fell forward onto his hands, gasping. "Your life will be forfeit if you are lying," Sesshomaru said. A hard shake of the head was the response. 

"Sesshomaru-sama! Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken came sprinting over and stopped, panting slightly, in front of his master, who peered down at him. "She isn't looking well, my lord, and I just found bite marks on her throat. She might have been poisoned." 

Sesshomaru's lips pressed into a thin line and his gaze snapped back to the viper, whose face drained of color and he began shaking his head again, pointing to the corpse, laying the blame on one who could not defend himself. It did not matter to Sesshomaru, who separated the viper's head from his body with a flick of the wrist, the Whip retracting and disappearing in the same motion. 

"Serves you right," Jaken said, kicking the head away, then ran to catch up to his master, only to collide with the back of his leg when the daiyoukai suddenly stopped. "What is it, my lord?" he asked, voice muffled as he rubbed at his nose. 

Sesshomaru stooped down and picked up the familiar silver chains that had caught his eye. A quick scan of the ground revealed the pendants a few yards away and he gathered those as well, stowing them in the folds of his haori before coming to crouch next the woman. His fingers touched her neck where he could see two puncture holes beneath the blood that decorated her pale skin. There was no venom he could smell and the jugular had not been severed. It was the head injury that gave cause for concern. Her hair was matted with blood and a closer inspection revealed a shallow cut above the temple, but the damage beneath the flesh could be worse. A cracked skull, swelling of the brain, could be fatal. She had already died once today, and that should never have happened, nor this.

_"I intend to survive this era of warring states...being in your company greatly reduces those chances."_

His eyes closed at the memory. Why did it seem as if she was never wrong? It was starting to become irritating, but even he had to acknowledge that her death at his mother's hands and these injuries from the vipers were because of her association with him. She knew the risks, had agreed to accompany him, but her condition was his responsibility, just as it had been that day on the cliff. It did not sit well with him, knowing he was the cause. He lifted Lucidity into his arms as he had done before, her head coming to rest on his fur. She groaned at the movement, an improvement compared to last time, but did not wake, even as he mounted Ah-Un and took the reins, Jaken climbing onto the saddle behind him.

* * *

"With your permission, my lord, I think it might be best if I take Kirara to Jinenji. Do you have everything you need here?" 

"Yes. Go," replied Sesshomaru, who was sitting by a stream and dipping a cloth into the flowing water. Lucidity lay on his other side, propped up on his mokomoko, much as he had done in the past when recovering from a battle.

"Thank you, my lord. I'll return as soon as possible," Jaken said, already scrambling onto Ah-Un with a sick and trembling two-tailed youkai in his grasp. 

Sesshomaru did not watch them leave, but peered over at the fire Jaken had built and the assortment of items laid out nearby. Medicinal herbs, salve, bandages, most of it from the contents of Lucidity's pack. What was fresh, Jaken had made, but the rest was from Kagome. Sesshomaru well remembered his annoyance at her interference prior to their departure. Now, he found himself...grateful for the small pharmacopoeia. He wrung out the cloth and returned to the tedious task of wiping the blood from Lucidity's skin, not all of which he would be able to remove without peeling away certain items of clothing. So, he focused instead on the area around the wounds. With her still unconscious, he had to turn her head the better to reach the cut near her temple. The side of her face was crusted with blood, but little by little it was coming off under his careful ministrations. 

It seemed a strange sight to him, watching his own hands place the cloth back into the water to scrub and rinse, all so that he might continue tending to an injured human. Rin and Jaken had always taken care of themselves or each other when the need arose. Lucidity was the first Sesshomaru had seen to himself.

His mother's words threatened to rise to the forefront of his mind when he peered down at the woman, at the stillness of her face and the crimson water that trickled along her skin, and quickly pushed the memory from his thoughts. Yet he couldn't completely cast aside the frustration it brought him. He tipped Lucidity's head back and moved the cloth over the puncture wounds, wanting nothing more than to focus on the task. But it was menial work and did not require much beyond a delicate touch. 

Delicate, because she was. The perfect prey, who had been left alone, because of him. He clenched his teeth, tension gripping his shoulders. This...feeling, he loathed it. Being responsible. Having...guilt. Straightening, he glared down at the prone figure, as if she was somehow at fault for the warring conflict inside him. Yet was she? At the beginning of their journey, he had found her expendable, a suitable loss if it was necessary; he would have not thought twice about sacrificing her life. Now he was threatening to lock his mother back inside a vault for doing just that and killing youkai he would have otherwise allowed to live because he had not cared enough to bother with, until he learned the extent of the harm inflicted upon this woman. Somewhere between tolerating her company and developing a mutual respect, she had become someone he wanted to protect. How had he allowed this to happen? How could he allow himself to be so manipulated?

Dropping the cloth, Sesshomaru turned his hand over and peered down at the scar, tinted with blood and no longer the vibrant red of a burn. The entity had warned him she was in danger, led him to her. He hadn't questioned it at the time, hadn't wanted to, but now he began to wonder at the odds of fate bringing them together, of bringing him the one person, the only person, in this land who could help him, someone he would have overlooked otherwise. Even with her exotic appearance, he would never have deigned to speak with her, not even acknowledge beyond a curious glance. He would have left with Rin that day and never looked back at the gaijin hanging herbs outside a hut, never have given her a second thought.

Brow furrowing, he picked up the cloth, rinsed it once more, and slid his hand over Lucidity's cheek to tilt her head up before pressing the cloth to the other side of her face. When had all this changed? When had he deemed it appropriate to take care of a human with his own hands, to lower himself to even take an interest? Before the landslide? After? He'd reacted when he saved her; he still needed her help and that would not be possible if she was buried beneath rubble. But even then, he could not deny that there was more to the impulsive decision that led to using himself as a shield to save a human. She intrigued him with her talk of life, her respect for it, and her condemnation of others who didn't, her resolve to kill with a conviction as strong as any youkai. And after, when they stood in what was left of the cave, she had not been frightened by the manifestation of his power. Rather, she'd been captivated. More than that, there had been a physical response. He remembered the shift in her scent, how her skin had warmed, and it had been more distracting than the strange clothes. And that, in turn, had annoyed him. Even now he was irritated at the effect she had on him and knew he should not allow it to continue. 

A matter made all the easier when she began to stir, when her eyes fluttered open and took a moment to focus. There was no mistaking the fear he saw in their depths upon her recognizing him, finding him so close. He drew back, still holding the cloth, and put a hand on her shoulder when she attempted to sit up. 

"Don't move," he said, but she was already settling back into the fur, face pale and twisted in pain, a hand going to her head.

"What happened?" she asked. 

"What do you remember?" As he spoke, he went through the motions of washing the cloth, and then brought it to her neck. She stiffened in response, but didn't pull away. 

"The vipers, then you and Jaken," she eventually answered. 

"The vipers rendered you unconscious after their barrier failed," he told her. "I assume that was your doing?" 

She started to nod, only to shudder and wince, immediately growing still. "A crystal around his neck; I crushed it," she said, hand going to her own throat. Sesshomaru noticed a moment of panicked movement when she found it bare, fingers searching for absent chains, which he would return when not treating wounds. Soon the hand dropped onto her lap and her body sagged into the mokomoko. The tension drained from her, regardless of his continued ministrations, and he saw her eyes open, but remain downcast, expression drawn, solemn, and the sight did not fit with her next question: "Where's Jaken?" 

"He has taken the nekomata to Jinenji," he said. 

"Jinenji?" 

"A hanyou with potent herbs that can treat venom." 

"Oh...Kagome...she told me about him...."

The vague response, eyes falling shut, and head sliding down the fur had Sesshomaru reaching out and lifting her face by the chin. Her eyes flew open, startled. "Now that you are awake, you should remain alert," he explained. "The head injury might be severe." 

"Wonderful," she muttered, and the dry sarcasm was oddly reassuring. When he released her and lowered the cloth into the water for a final time, she watched him, a frown creasing her bruised lips. "Why did you come looking for me?" 

He wrung out the cloth and laid it down. "You were in danger." 

"But-" 

"Would you rather I hadn't?" he interrupted, his tone and manner indifferent as he picked up the bowl of salve.

"I hit you...told you to stay away." Her voice was almost as neutral as his, save for the confusion laced in the words. "I didn't think it mattered to you what happened to me."

He dipped his fingers into the medicine and began to apply it on the puncture wounds, ignoring the quickened pulse he could feel. "I have already told you that I would not have allowed my mother to kill you. I do not understand why you believe that would not be the same for any other youkai." His hand moved up and carefully touched her temple. 

"I would have." 

He paused at the soft, candid response, his gaze sliding over to meet hers. "If the roles had been reversed, you would have let me die to save yourself and your mother?" 

There was a curl to her lip, so brief he almost didn't notice. "If my father was still here, yes, I'd do it for him. Family comes first; I didn't think it would be any different with you. To me, you sounded angry over how she killed me, rather than the act itself, like it was bad manners not to ask your permission." 

How interesting it was that a handful of words could reveal so much, from the reason for her sudden fear of him to a fierce loyalty to a father who had passed from this world, a matter he could not fault her for. She had mentioned the man before, but not once had she hinted that he was dead. It made Sesshomaru realize how little he actually knew about her. And why should he? He'd never had any interest in wanting to learn about a human, beyond if the human was useful to him or not. But now....

His thumb brushed the salve over the cut near her temple and she winced, eyes closing. "You struck me because you believed I was willing to kill you," he said, lowering his hand into the water to rinse off the residue.

"I...I guess it...looks like I was wrong."

"Indeed."

The smile that touched her lips was bitter. "I suppose another apology is in order."

"Given your condition and the circumstances, I will overlook your outburst this time," he said. The memory of her bowing, of how contrite she'd been, right after he had deemed her little more than haughty and childish and worth no further attention, had left him questioning his own judgment. She was causing him with more trouble than he cared for, creating too many distractions.

"Is there any willow bark?" she asked suddenly.

He peered over at the herbs and there was silence as he prepped water from the stream to heat for a painkilling tea. But when he eventually presented her with a cup and she reached to take it, he held it a moment longer, peering at her over the rising steam. "You will speak of this to no one," he said.

She blinked, stared a moment, and then a smile split her face. His hands fell away, but the damage was done. She was laughing. Holding the tea in one hand, covering her mouth with the other, she was cringing in pain, but unable to control herself. "Don't," she soon gasped out. "Oh, don't! It hurts." She tilted her head back, shaking with mirth. "Sesshomaru playing nursemaid. Gods, now I _want_ to tell someone!"

"You will not," he said. "And 'nursemaid' is not the proper term."

She only laughed again, clutching her stomach, the tea threatening to spill. He took it from her with a look of disapproval, but she simply grinned at him. The cut in her lip had cracked and blood was trickling down her chin. He reached out and wiped it away with a thumb before handing the cup back. "Control yourself, woman," he said, licking the blood from his thumb, realizing a second too late what he'd done. A hard frown lined his mouth as the metallic taste spread over his tongue and he slid his arms into the sleeves of his haori before another bout of foolishness seized him.

"Awkward," Lucidity muttered.

* * *

The night was moonless. The great expanse of stars was broken by the occasional cloud. The rushing water of the stream and fresh sparks emitting from the fire as he placed another log in the flames accompanied the song of cicadas that filled the air. A low level youkai was nearby, attracted by the scent of human blood. Sesshomaru had been following its progress as it prowled through the area, not daring to move closer while he was here. For a while now, he had been debating on ridding them of the annoyance, but that would mean leaving the woman alone. Even if it was only for a short time, he was unwilling to leave her vulnerable to another attack, and unwilling to stop and contemplate the change in his attitude that affected his decisions. He might have acknowledged it, but that did not mean he was pleased about the matter. It caused nothing but conflict, skewered his views and previous conceptions, interfered with his priorities, and overall left him in a state of constant agitation on some level. No, he was not happy at this turn of events. 

He peered over at Lucidity and found her eyes closed, her breathing shallow, whereas a moment ago she had been watching the sky alongside him. Yet when he touched her shoulder, she lifted her head and looked at him, still awake, but drowsy.

"What?" she said. "If you want me to stay alert, talk to me. I'm getting tired and watching stars is entertaining for only so long."

He folded his arms and shifted his gaze back to the sky. "You have been awake for hours; the danger has passed. You may rest."

"You sure I won't drop off in my sleep?" she asked wryly. "Or that youkai won't attack?"

"I will keep watch," he replied, not bothering to question how she was aware of even the lowest class of creatures.

He heard her shift in his furs. "No sleep for you, then?"

"I have already slept this week."

There was a moment of silence, then: "I'm...sorry? Did you say 'this week?'"

He glanced back at her and saw that he had inadvertently granted her request; she was fully awake again and staring at him in amazement. "Yes. I do not require as much sleep as a human."

"Eh...how much exactly?"

"As needed," he said, starting to turn away, until she gave a sigh, disappointment etched along her face. How irritating. "It varies," he found himself explaining. "I seek to fight only the strongest of opponents. If the challenge is great enough, I require time and rest to recover. If there are none worthy of confrontation, a full cycle of the moon may pass before sleep is necessary."

"So, every night, you're awake while the rest of us sleep?"

"Yes."

"Sounds...boring."

He let out a low breath, feeling a pull at the corners of his mouth. "The solitude is preferable."

"Hmm," she sighed. "That's understandable. I don't enjoy being around people that much either, present company excluded."

Considering what had taken place today, he did not expect such a claim. "You would choose a youkai over humans?" he asked. This conversation ultimately had no practical purpose and yet he was willing, wanting, to continue with the inane prattle. It was vexing.

"I'd choose a youkai over my own-" Suddenly, she stopped, looking stricken, then scoffed, glaring at the ground. When she glanced up to his watching her, she seemed even less pleased, her discomfort unmistakable.

He studied this abrupt change in her demeanor and voiced his curiosity, an act he was not prone to, not when he knew it to be a personal matter of no consequence and a subject that clearly troubled the object of his intrigue. "Over what, Lucidity?"

She was already looking away, brow furrowed, but inhaled deeply at the question, the taut muscles of her shoulders relaxing, as if resigning herself to answer. "My own family," she finally said.

"Your family," he repeated. "Other than your father, you mean? You have not mentioned them before." It came to his attention that, in the times when she had spoken of returning home, she had not once brought up the matter of a family, of someone waiting for her, perhaps another who worried about where she had gone. No friends. No husband. Was she alone, then?

"I've never had a reason to," she replied, still watching the ground.

"Are they not concerned about your whereabouts?"

She straightened, closing her eyes for a moment, before fixing him with a gaze as calculating as that of another particular female. "Aren't you full of questions tonight," she remarked, but immediately added, "I made it abundantly clear that I would not be speaking to any of them for some time. As far as they know, I'm in another country. The fact that I'm in another time is more of an oversight."

Sesshomaru frowned slightly. In the same breath, she'd acknowledged the strange behavior of the youkai lord and also showed that she was willing to answer his questions. Was there a limit to her willingness? "What was the cause of your separation?" he asked. Her gaze dropped once more and she lifted a hand to her neck. The familiar motion of her fingers grasping for something that was no longer there had him reaching into his haori and extracting the jewelry.

Her eyes widened and her mouth fell open. She was sitting up, leaning forward, injuries forgotten, as she took the necklaces he held out. The elation in her was palpable, even before she began to speak, the foreign words flowing together and for once not spoken in anger. The sounds were indistinguishable to his ears, with the exception of his name in there somewhere. "Gods, I never thought I'd see these again," she breathed, reverting to his language and clutching the necklaces tight, as she looked up at him. She shifted closer suddenly, then went still before settling back, leaving him with the distinct impression that she'd been about to hug him and relieved she hadn't. "Thank you, Sesshomaru. Gods, you have no idea...." She trailed off into silence, examining the pieces more closely to see what was salvageable. 

Gods. She kept saying 'gods' and Sesshomaru noticed it was only when she was gripped by strong emotions. The viper had said his Elders had gone to new worlds, brought back new magics, from people who were scattered and hunted, sought safety in numbers. Her people, he'd claimed. She had told Sesshomaru that her father studied old religions, dead ones. But it suddenly became clear to him that the man had done more. He'd raised Lucidity, trained her, in these ancient arts. She'd quaked when that strange writing was revealed on the vault and refused to answer when asked, because she knew what was done to those like her in this era.

_"You have your secrets and I have mine."_

The daiyoukai closed his eyes. He understood now. Her hostility, the underlining tension she carried when around others, even among those who considered her friend, the reason she maintained a distance. She was afraid. Always. The desperation to return to her own time must have been overwhelming, which made it all the more astounding, even to Sesshomaru, that she was able to maintain such composure.

"You should sleep," he said abruptly.

Lucidity looked up from where she was stringing the pendants onto one chain, surprised. "What? Why do you-"

"You're injured and need rest. We will set out in the morning if your health permits."

"I...okay," she said, and her readiness to agree suggested she was not so willing to answer his last question.

And that was fine with him. The day had given him enough to think about. More than enough, he thought, as he felt the weight of her against his furs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's this? Two chapters in two days? Yeah, there might have been a bit of a writing spree this weekend. Honestly, this chapter kind of got away from me. There was an idle plan of some reflection from Sesshomaru, his going over what Mamushi had to say, and then having a talk with Lucidity. The title slip in there? So not planned, but it fit too well for me to leave out. And now you have more on Lucidity's background! And if any of you are wondering, like with her nationality, I will not be specifying the old religion. Though bombs of hints have been dropped, I prefer not to label it with a name. ^.^


	15. Chapter 15

Lucidity stared at the great expanse of the mountain in the near distance. A giant, albeit lonely thing it was, rising from the vast stretch of meadows and farmland. The fields of an unfamiliar village created symmetrical patterns in the landscape. Standing on a hillside, she could see the movement of people milling about or working, carts and wagons, beasts of burden on the road or in the field, children playing, women with infants on their backs. There was still time in the season for planting, but it appeared that the harvesting of certain foods had begun. Normal, quiet, everyday life. And she had no desire to venture closer.

She'd spent the last day and a half alone in Sesshomaru's company and wasn't eager to meet anyone new, especially after the last two encounters. And she already had to make a few adjustments, such as carrying her own pack at all times and always being on foot, unable to take a rest on Ah-Un without slowing their progress. And with her still recovering, there was some progress lost. The morning after the whole Sesshomaru's mother-slash-viper-attack nightmare, she was sore in places she didn't remember being injured. Her sides hurt and when she touched her ribs, she found the area tender. It took her a while to determine that it must have happened when one of the vipers had grabbed her around the middle and yanked her off Kirara. The memory was such a blur and she didn't care to struggle with picking out details. Her head hurt enough as it was and she couldn't endure sudden movements or sharp turns of her neck, not unlike whiplash after being in a car accident. Except she'd had fucking fangs in her throat from some demented version of a vampire.

Sesshomaru was patient with her, at least, or simply wasn't in a hurry to be anywhere. With his mother freed, Lucidity could only assume he didn't have anything pressing, other than finding the Viper Clan. Either way, he hadn't rushed her the morning after, but let her take her time washing the blood out of her clothes. It was a relief to find that the youkai silk was well on the way to mending itself and she didn't bother dressing into the tank top and jeans, and focused on scrubbing the last of the blood from her body while the silk dried. And, again, no interference from the youkai lord, who had given her a wide berth for the sake of privacy and was, essentially, forced to wait until she declared she was ready to leave.

Lucidity wasn't certain and part of her believed she was over analyzing, but something seemed off with him. She was accustomed to his perpetual silence and aloof manner, which was why his sudden penchant for questions-personal ones at that-and being agreeable to answer her own with actual detail were so surprising. Yet it was only that one night and then he was back to being his normal self with responses that often ranged about two or five syllables. She didn't mind, one way or another, but it confused her. The evening, overall, was a whirlwind of weirdness and confusion. Waking to Sesshomaru's hand against her cheek and rubbing a wet cloth over her face, in all sense of the word taking _care_ of her, was the last thing she expected, even after what he considered a simple outburst on her part.

She hated thinking about it, about all of it, but at least he'd given her a pass. His mother, after all, had just killed her. But still, the fact that she, Lucidity, believed that Sesshomaru had been indifferent to her death actually made her feel a sense of shame, because his actions afterward proved the exact opposite. And what was more, Lucidity would have done it. At the time, as she and the daiyoukai stood, she would have been willing to kill him if it meant saving herself and her father. The fact that Sesshomaru would not, had not, spoke-no screamed-volumes. Until that moment, she hadn't realized that the dynamic of their arrangement had shifted so drastically.

The broken chain tied around her wrist slid down as she reached up and fingered the pendants beneath her tunic. Yeah, something had definitely changed and she doubted it was for the best. As her eyes raked over the village, taking in all the finer details, a frown creased her lips, her forehead wrinkled, and, being so lost in thought, she nearly didn't hear the footsteps coming up behind her. She turned her head as Sesshomaru came to stand beside her.

"Any sign of Jaken?" she asked.

"No," was the brief answer as his eyes swept the landscape, narrowing almost imperceptibly.

"Something wrong?"

"Ah-Un's absence is an inconvenience," he replied, but did not explain further.

Lucidity peered back at the mountain. "That isn't so far for you to fly, right?"

"I prefer not to expend unnecessary energy. And your fear of heights complicates the matter enough as it is."

She shot him a dirty look for that, but he was already walking away, towards the village. Her stomach clenched, but she followed, adjusting the strap of the pack on her shoulder. "So, you're saying Kaidame is at the top of the mountain?" she asked, bewildered after everything she'd been told. Was the path to the top too treacherous, like the cave Jaken had found? Sesshomaru had only mentioned that they were nearing Kaidame, before he suddenly told her to stay put while he checked to see if his dutiful servant had caught up with them or not.

"Above the mountain," he said without breaking stride.

Lucidity, on the other hand, nearly tripped. "Above?! Seriously?!"

"Yes."

She groaned, covering her face.

"You have been told that no human can reach Kaidame without the aid of a youkai." 

"Oh, bite me!" she snapped. "No one said anything about having to fly to get there, let alone above a freaking mountain!" Though it made sense now, why Myoga wanted to use Kirara. She glared up at the offending pile of rock, then down at the cluster of huts and other buildings that surrounded its base. "We're not going through the village, are we?"

"It is the most direct route."

She felt an unmistakable tightening of nerves. "But...wouldn't we create a panic with the villagers?"

"Going around will take longer."

What the hell? If that was the case, why didn't they just fly there now? Was he.... Holy shit! Was he taking her needs into consideration? Was he willingly going into a village, to get them as close to the mountain on foot, to save time and keep from flying as long as possible because he knew it scared her? It did and did not make sense, because this was Sesshomaru and he wasn't suppose to consider others. But what reason could he have to go into a place full of humans if it didn't involve visiting Rin? Or did he just not want to carry her? Was that why Ah-Un not being here was such an issue?

The village was looming closer. It seemed easier to pick out the faces of people. She could hear the sounds of carts bumping along the dirt roads, voices resonating, and overall energetic activity of a busy community. The very thought of going near these strangers filled her with dread. Her pace had slowed and the distance between herself and the daiyoukai was beginning to lengthen. With another stab of anxiety, she hurried forward and caught the sleeve of his haori without thinking. He stopped and looked back as she quickly let go.

"I'd...much rather fly at this point," she said in a soft voice, as though afraid they had already begun to attract attention. She peered back at the village and stiffened when she did, in fact, spot a cluster of men on the outskirts who were peering in their direction. She swallowed, any moment expecting to hear something along the lines of knocking off her foolishness or that her worries were pointless. But when she looked back to Sesshomaru, she found him frowning at her, his gaze so scrutinizing that she had to fight down the impulse to step back. Then he blinked and the mask of cool indifference returned.

"As you wish," he said.

The next thing she knew she was being lifted up, feeling one arm beneath her knees and the other curled around her back. Her own arms automatically wrapped around Sesshomaru's neck, pack hanging from her elbow, and-dammit! Wasn't she past this? Being nervous with his hands on her face and throat when she was positive as hell that he was capable of killing her was one thing. But this, simply being held, shouldn't affect her so strongly. She didn't like it, not one bit, and stared resolutely at her knees as she felt his hand clutch her shoulder. Then, without warning, their forms dissolved. In a contracting energy of near blinding light, Lucidity could not see herself or Sesshomaru as they rose into the air. But she could still feel him, still had a sense of self, and tightened her grip on him, eyes screwing shut. No way was she going to be looking anywhere, not like this, not in this form. Flying on Ah-Un or Kirara was bad enough, but this! No wonder Sesshomaru had procrastinated. Why couldn't he have at least warned her of this crazy flight mode?! She wanted to ask, but didn't trust herself to speak or even keep her breakfast down.

The world rushed around in a confusion of wind that threatened to deafen. She could only imagine how the sight of this giant, glowing orb was affecting the people of the village. Or were they accustomed to youkai sightings if they lived beneath the home of a Seer so popular among his peers? A question to ask at another, much later time, because she could barely recall what it was that she needed to discuss with Kaidame at this point. Something about rising power and burn scars that had a link to getting her home. Her head was spinning something fierce and she pressed her face hard into the crook of Sesshomaru's neck, or at least what felt like it, because she just couldn't be certain of much right now. They were still flying, maybe rising higher at this point. The air seemed to be getting colder, a bit thinner, and...yeah, that was definitely a change in pressure she was feeling. Her stomach rolled and she was pretty certain that was bile she was tasting in the back of her throat. Maybe this wasn't a good idea, so soon after a head injury.

Lucidity was on the verge of telling Sesshomaru to stop his ascent, to let her off this crazy ride, when she felt him begin to slow. A low whine rose in her throat and she tried to swallow it down along with the contents of her stomach, the wind still whipping around them. And then, finally-blessed gods, finally!-she felt him touch down, start to walk a few paces, but she was already squirming, trying to get free, pushing at his armor until he got the hint. She dropped to a knee the moment she was free, tossing the pack aside, and clamped a hand tightly over her mouth, not daring to so much as look around as she tried to get control of herself. Nausea rolled over her, a constant flirt, teasing back and forth, and she shuddered, swallowing again and again. Footsteps moved around her and she risked opening her eyes a fraction. Familiar, booted feet were standing in front of her.

"You...might...mmph...want to move," she managed to get out, feeling a churning in her gut. But Sesshomaru only crouched down and she turned her head away, having no intention of getting sick on him. She nearly jumped when she felt fingers in her hair, lifting the heavy locks out of the way to expose the healing cut on the side of her head.

"We should have waited until you were fully recovered," came the deep rumble of his voice. Crap, what was he doing?

She pushed his hand away. "I'll be fine." She took a deep breath. "Just...just give me a minute." Her stomach was in tatters. Her head was hurting. Her ears were in need of a serious popping. And she was about to throw up on the youkai lord of the western lands, but yeah, she was totally fine. Sesshomaru's derisive snort said he was well aware of this, too. She shoved at his leg, but he was already standing, giving her space. Or he could have been moving away because of the sudden flutter of wings, coupled with a loud, wheezing laugh.

"My, my, my, what have you brought me this time, Sesshomaru?" cackled a dry voice. "You know I don't eat humans, but this one looks positively delicious. And that hair! I would not mind parting with some wisdom in exchange for the sun spun into fabric. Oh, yes! That hair could be woven and corded into the most beautiful patterns. My daughters would love some, should they ever deign to visit their father. Yes, oh, yes! I could offer the locations of some wonderful artifacts or the elusive resting place of an ancient emperor. What do you say, Sesshomaru?"

Footsteps.

A gasp.

WHAM!

"OOWW!!"

What the hell? 

Lucidity, temples throbbing, lifted her head and blinked into the bright light of a sun drenched, cloudless world. The first thing she saw was Sesshomaru standing next to a creature about a foot shorter than him, clutching his head and sporting a newly formed lump rising from straight, gray hair that stretched all the way to the ground. His hands were gnarled with long fingers tapering into equally long claws. High, rounded shoulders. A cloak of black feathers. A lined, oval face and perfectly round, dark eyes, no whites. A thin nose stretched down most of the face, ending in point that nearly covered the simple line of a mouth. When the creature straightened and lowered his hands, she noticed the feather tufts that resembled horns. Were those ears? She couldn't be sure. She didn't know much about owls.

"There is no need for such violence, you uncouth brat!" the creature said, fat tears in his eyes. "If you did not bring the human as a token to bargain with, why is she here?"

"This is the gaijin whom you demanded the flea bring to you," said Sesshomaru, arrogant impatience laced in every word.

Kaidame scratched his cheek. "The flea?" he muttered vaguely.

Sesshomaru struck him again, a lazy backhand of a punch upside the head that nonetheless brought another yelp of pain from the old bird; Lucidity was getting the distinct impression that Sesshomaru didn't like him. Less than a minute after meeting him, she could see why others called Kaidame "half-mad." How long would it take for him to get his head on straight and give the information they had come for? And that would be after haggling and agreeing to terms. Lucidity had never haggled before, unless one counted exchanging clothes and jewelry between friends, and it was doubtful that Kaidame would be anything like a teen girl who was reluctant to hand over a T-shirt signed by a band. She really wanted to get this over and done with, to be shown a way home. 

As Kaidame shouted about not needing to jar his brain into working, Lucidity pushed herself to her feet. The waves of nausea were coming less frequently, but she still pressed the back of her hand to her mouth and peered between the two youkai. Both were watching her, Kaidame with open curiosity while rubbing at his head, and Sesshomaru quietly observing. 

"So you're the one Myoga spoke of," Kaidame said. "And very sick you seem, too. Pale. Yes, hmm, perhaps some medicine? I have no need of human remedies myself, but one never knows when certain plants might be useful to have around, so I keep as much stored as possible. I keep everything, come to think of it. Probably too much. Yes, too much, but never enough." 

Lucidity, wondering where he stored all these riches, looked from that wide, smiling oval face to the scenery behind him. In fact, she took in the sight of everything for the first time. As she'd seen before, there was nothing but sun overhead. The sky, however, was not cloudless. No, those fluffy white fucks were floating serenely beneath the sheer drop off Sesshomaru had landed them next to. She glimpsed the mountain and village below before hastily backpedaling away from the precipice, to the gales of laughter of Kaidame and right into an armor plated chest. A pair of hands caught her by the shoulders and she looked up, heart hammering, into the daiyoukai's face. 

"O! That you would be frightened by the open air!" Kaidame guffawed, and she felt an unexpected yank on her arm that pulled her away from Sesshomaru and, thankfully, the precipice as well; though her stomach did somersault a warning.

The mad Seer led her along, quite cheerful despite his many lumps, through an old torii rotting beneath vegetation and up a set of stairs carved into the land and nearly lost to the surrounding forest. Lucidity peered up at the massive dome-like shape of earth that they were climbing over, painted with trees and shrubbery that was set at the base of an impossibly tall cliff that was just one of many in the great mountain that overlooked everything. A waterfall cascaded over the cliff and, as they reached the top of the dome and the land evened out, she saw that it emptied into a large, dark blue pool easily the size of a stadium football field. This, all of this, was floating above the world, like some limbo heaven. It truly was breathtaking, straight out of the surreal art movement.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" said Kaidame, still dragging her behind him without really giving her the chance to look around. "This is Mount Fukuro, home of my ancestors. It is said that they tired of the battle-worn lands below and wanted to find a sanctuary. But since they did not want to leave their home, every man, woman, and child capable dug their claws into the earth and took the home with them when they flew to the heavens above and it's been here ever since. Our numbers used to be vast, but now it's just me. I think people forget I'm up here until they need something. It's been ages since my daughters have visited. You would like them, such sweet girls. I think they're overdue to find some husbands, though. Sesshomaru, would you be-" 

"No," said Sesshomaru from behind her. 

Lucidity snickered and could have sworn she heard a low growl in return. Kaidame brought her to a door in the domed hill, so heavily draped with leaves that she didn't see it until he had it open and was disappearing into the dark hole, pulling her right through. What was awaiting on the other side, though, was shocking. Of all the things she had expected, a cozy den with a cooking hearth was not one of them. It wasn't that large either, barely enough to accommodate all three of them. And Sesshomaru, with that great length of fur over his shoulder, looked too big to be allowed. 

"Wait right here and I'll get that medicine for you. Upset stomach, yes? Headache, too, I'm sure. I'll be right back," Kaidame said, all smiles and pleasant humming, as he hurried through what was little more than a hole in the wall on the other side of the den. 

Lucidity waited a few moments, then peered over at Sesshomaru, a smile playing on her lips. "Birds not your taste?" she teased. 

He leveled her with blank face that did not entirely hide his annoyance. "His daughters are dead. All his people are." 

She felt as if she'd been smacked. Any and all humor evaporated. The smile slid from her face as she peered back at the doorway Kaidame had gone through, no longer finding his behavior absurd or amusing. The pity that welled up inside her chest was not unlike a physical ache and she had to clear her throat before speaking. Yet she couldn't think of a damn thing to say. How cruel it was for people to say he was insane, when he was nothing more than a lonely, old man. Youkai, perhaps, but still the last of his kind. His children dead. No fate could be worse.

She waited in troubled silence with Sesshomaru until Kaidame reappeared, carrying a woven basket of dried herbs and speaking in a sing-song voice that he'd found the perfect plants. He prattled on about medicinal qualities while he busied himself around the cooking hearth, going on about the difference of preserving herbs and roots, then how best to steep or mash or cut or wash. He boiled water, prepped the medicine, mentioned something about bumping his head the other day and wishing he had some berries, and never once looked in their direction or paused for input. Lucidity watched with something akin to a morbid fascination and managed to get a murmur of gratitude in there when he had handed her a shallow bowl of deep amber liquid. Now he was talking about one of his daughters having a headache last summer and that it was so nice to have someone new to take care of. She didn't say a word or even look at him, but quickly drank the medicine and felt the warmth of the liquid spread through her stomach.

"Feel better?" Kaidame asked, taking the bowl back. But before she could so much as open her mouth, he was walking away. "No you don't. You won't feel better until you're back on solid ground. It won't always be like this, so don't worry. This way, you two" And he was through the hole and out of sight again.

Sesshomaru had to duck down to fit through the low opening and Lucidity, feeling like she was following the white rabbit, was right behind him. The passageway was narrow and the only light was what lay beyond. She could hear Kaidame's humming, the rustle of fabric from Sesshomaru's clothes, and the occasional echo one of his swords, or even hers, scraping against the wall. But she started to make out the sound of rushing water, felt a dampness beneath the stone, and realized they must be underneath the falls. In front of her, Sesshomaru ducked again and she glimpsed beyond him the passage opening up into what appeared to be another room. She stepped out and felt her jaw drop.

They were in a cave, unlike anything she'd ever seen before, in pictures or otherwise. Certainly there were the classic cave formations such as stalagmites and stalactites, so large and varied that they appeared to be as columns. And the thought of columns actually fit rather well, considering the cave was essentially the size of several cathedrals, possibly more. Torches were lined high and low on the walls and stretched further than she could see, fading into the distance. The cliff, she realized. The cliff, the hill, the entire damn Mount Fukuro was hollow! Was that somehow essential to the magic that kept the mountain afloat? She didn't know and didn't really have the mind to ask. Maybe it would be one of the things she'd have to take at face value in this era, like giant fangs as swords and reincarnated priestesses. 

The size of the cave, however, was only part of the reason for her astonishment. As far as she could see, from the bottom to the unbelievable top, were artifacts beyond the counting. She could see armor, tapestries, weapons, maps, statues, sarcophagi, and something that looked like those face carvings from Easter Island. Scrolls beyond scrolls. So many tomes piled together that one could build a house, probably several, out of them. And so much more, more than she could ever describe, objects she couldn't even recognize, let alone name. Not only from this country, but from many others. She spotted Viking shields, helmets from Spain, and paintings there were unmistakable depictions of ancient Rome. The knowledge that must be stored here, the history, secrets that not even the most dedicated of scholars would ever be able to discover. 

"[Jesus Christ,]" Lucidity whispered, feeling distinctly weak in the knees. "[Jesus fucking Christ.]" 

Kaidame, who was standing next to a Greek statue of a woman, chuckled and folded his hands in front of him. "I believe that is the wrong deity for you, my dear." He touched the statue beside him. "I believe this is more suited to your taste. Do you know who this is?" 

Lucidity resisted the urge to reach for her pendants and, feeling uneasy and wondering how he understood her, looked at the statue more closely. The woman carried a spear and shield featuring the head of a gorgon. Then she spotted the owl on the shoulder. "Athena," she said, looking back at a smiling Kaidame. "A favorite of yours?" 

"But of course!" Kaidame nodded, practically beaming at this point. "Now let's broker a deal, my dear, and see what you can pay to have your questions answered. Come along, now. I may have something for you if we can reach an agreement." 

And he was walking off once more, making his way down a winding aisle between the hoarded treasures. She began to follow, but stopped when she noticed Sesshomaru examining the statue. 

"This is from your country?" he asked. 

She shook her head. "No. I'm just familiar with the lore." 

He stood a moment longer. There was a minute creasing of his brow that made her wonder what he could be thinking. But when she heard Kaidame call out, asking where they were, she hurried to where he waited. She found him hunched over a table that was covered in a mountain of scrolls with more beneath and around it. Echoing footsteps told her that Sesshomaru was not far behind.

"Hmm, let's see, let's see," Kaidame muttered. "Should be...this one." And he yanked a random scroll from the bottom that sent the entire pile spilling down and landing at his feet. He paid the mess no mind as he tore off the cord that held the scroll together and unrolled it. "Yes, yes, mmm, yes. Here we go. Now!" He snapped the scroll shut and stowed it beneath his wing. "What are you willing to trade me for this?" 

"Er...what exactly is 'this?' I haven't even asked you anything yet," she said. 

"There is no need." It was Sesshomaru who spoke. "Kaidame has an irritating habit of knowing the answer before people have questions." 

The old bird chuckled. "And what an inquisitive pup you've been, son of Inu no Taisho," he said, and there was something decidedly unfriendly in his tone.

"You beg for an early grave with such talk, Seer," Sesshomaru replied and Lucidity heard the distinct crack of knuckles. 

"My grave will be of my own making, not yours," said Kaidame and his dry voice was suddenly sharp, without a hint of the vague manner he'd been conducting himself in. "Death is my oldest friend and I will embrace Him when the time is right. Now is not that time. The time...the time...ah, my dear." And his friendly smile returned like a veil closing over his anger. "Out of time. The Lady is. She is, always had been, always will be. That is you. Ah, so tragic. The silver. That is what I want." He pointed a gnarled finger at Lucidity. "I will have your silver. Give me all of it and I will tell you everything. The scars on your hands. Where you must go. Why you were brought here. Everything. All. The puzzle is Hers and you must be the one to complete it, but I will give you the pieces." 

This time, Lucidity did grab the necklace through her tunic, her eyes widening. She couldn't begin to decipher out anything that Kaidame was saying. None of it made sense, except for the little part of his wanting her jewelry. "No...no way," she said. "Isn't there anything else?" 

"What is close to your heart is the only price you will pay!" Kaidame screeched, fists flailing and his dark eyes lit up, glowing bright. "Give me the Goddess! Give me eternal life! Or I will tell you nothing!" 

She took an involuntary step back as the sweet old demeanor crumbled and she suddenly found herself staring at a shrieking, stomping and quite possibly dangerous daemon. Pulse quickening, she glanced up at Sesshomaru, who was standing next to her, to gauge his reaction and saw nothing but a quiet, golden gaze turned her way. 

"Do not waste my time!" the old bird roared. 

"He will take nothing else," the daiyoukai murmured in an undertone. 

Her heart sank. She peered back at Kaidame, who was glaring at her with those gleaming eyes, arms folded tight, and feathers ruffled. If this was her chance to return home, jewelry was a small price to pay. Yet her fingers felt a bit numb as she lifted the necklace over her head, the chain dragging her hair over one shoulder. There was a flash in Kaidame's eyes and he leaned forward. She held the two pendants in one hand and brushed her thumb over the ankh, feeling the oh-so-familiar contours of its shape. A lump threatened to rise in her throat and she felt a certain prickling heat in her eyes that made her steal herself for a long moment. 

"One." 

She looked up, startled. 

"Part with one," said Kaidame, "and I will tell some, but not all. And that. Give me that!" He pointed at the chain on her wrist. "And I will tell you your name, too." 

Her name? She knew her name, but.... "Fine, whatever," she muttered, untying the broken chain she'd kept simply because she hadn't known what else to do with it. She handed this and the female figure over to Kaidame, then quickly slipped the ankh back on. 

Kaidame, grinning wide, snatched the jewelry and held it up, his eyes glowing once more. "Lady out of time," he chortled and threw the scroll he'd concealed at her feet. "Go to the Isle of the Four Sisters." 

Beside her, Sesshomaru stiffened. The old bird laughed. 

"You know, pup, oh yes!" he cackled. "Not even your father would tangle with the Sisters. But you must! You must if you want the answers you refuse to pay me for." 

"The Isle cannot be found without the Sisters," Sesshomaru said. "And they have not been seen in centuries." 

Kaidame pointed at the scroll. "The path is there. Take it! They wait for the lady out of time. It is why she has been brought here!" 

Lucidity was beyond perplexed, and more than a little unnerved by everything, as she picked up the scroll and opened it to reveal a map. Swallowing, she peered over at Kaidame. "This is where I need to go? There's a way for me to get home from here?" 

"HOME?!" he shrieked with an uproarious laugh, head thrown back and eyes glinting. "Time is your home now. There are no paths back. All I will say is that you will live to see the end or you will die. The choice is yours. Go to the Isle and you will know the reason you were brought to this world, the reason you and your protector have been marked. Refuse and the rising power will ensure your death. The death of everyone will be certain, even mine, even your beloved pup's." 

Thoughts were slow to churn inside her head. She barely noticed Sesshomaru taking the scroll from her as her arms fell to her sides, staring at the Seer who spoke with a shadow on his tongue and yet proclaimed the one thing she did not ever want to hear. "I cannot get back?" she murmured. "I can't go home to my era?"

"Of course not," Kaidame said with a snort. "And why ever would you want to? You have nothing to return to."

Lucidity shook her head in an effort to clear it, feeling that she needed to say something, that there was more to ask, more to find out. Why was she brought here? Who was pulling the strings? What had branded her and Sesshomaru? All these questions were...moot. She didn't care about who or what or why. She didn't care about any rising power or threats to life, none of that! It had nothing to do with her! It couldn't possibly have anything to do with her. She was no one worthy of note, no one of great skill or knowledge or power. She was just a woman who wanted out of this hellhole, wanted to be safe, to have her life back. Was that too much to ask?

"He is of no further use to us, Lucidity," said Sesshomaru. "Come."

The order, for once, did not rankle her. She turned to follow him, the movement automatic, without thought.

"Wait!" Kaidame called, but she kept walking. "Wait, wait! The hair! I will still bargain for your hair. A trinket, perhaps, or tome? Scrolls from a library long since burned down? I hear those might be valuable to your people. Come now. Stop! Where are you going?"

Running footsteps came up behind her. She had absolutely no interest, no desire to remain here a second longer. And if she wasn't so distracted, she might have noticed the potential danger. As it were, feeling the fist working into her hair was a rough shock and her shout was more from surprise than pain as he jerked her back.

"Your hair, woman! Give me your hair!"

Her hand flew to the sword at her waist, ready to cut those decrepit old hands clean off when a streak of white and silver shot past her. She heard Kaidame cry out and a loud, sickening crash. Turning around, she saw the old bird half buried in the wreckage of what was left of his Athena statue. Sesshomaru stood next her, posture stiff, a hand clenched into a fist at his side and she knew that Kaidame was fortunate to still be breathing, even if he did appear to be knocked out cold.

"We're done here," the daiyoukai said and headed for the passageway.

Lucidity hesitated a moment, trying to see if she could spot the pendant anywhere on Kaidame or the floor around him. The meager information wasn't at all worth the price she'd paid. Yet when she couldn't see so much as a hint of silver and being unwilling to go through any pockets, she was forced to accept the loss and sprinted after Sesshomaru.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh god, this chapter was such a pain! I mean, Kaidame was fun to play with, but overall I'm glad to be done with it. If I could, I'd blow Mount Fukuro right out of the sky!


	16. Chapter 16

The twig snapped in Lucidity's hands and she fed the pieces to the flames of the campfire. This was starting to become an easy, familiar routine. A day of excitement followed by an evening sitting around, seeking warmth and security from a pile of burning wood. How long had it been since they had left the village, anyway? Felt like a lifetime and a half ago and yet she knew not much time had passed. So much had happened. Too much. She drew back the sleeve of her tunic and peered at the long, pink scar on her underarm, and then further up at the brand on her palm. The cut she'd made on the other hand to break into the vault had healed completely when she'd been brought back by Sesshomaru's mother. There was nothing to physically show for what the daemoness had done, not even a mark where she'd plunged an arm into Lucidity's chest. 

Pulling the sleeve back down, she picked up another twig from the small wood pile beside her, broke it, and tossed it into the fire. Was she supposed to just bounce back at this point? Carry on and push through. Put one foot in front of the other. Look at the silver lining. And all that other cliché bullshit? But, honestly, what else was she supposed to do? If there was no way for her to escape this world, she would have to make do. She would have to return to her niche in the village and do what she could to survive there. It wasn't as if she hadn't imagined this scenario every day, every night, since she awoke in the roots of Goshinboku. Home was the first thing she thought of when she got up in the morning and the last thing on her mind when she went to sleep. All that varied was the degree in which she allowed herself to dwell, whether it was a passing thought or so intense that a mental breakdown was imminent. And she never really dared to imagine returning to her time. She preferred to expect disappointment, because that way she'd never been disappointed. She never dared to believe. And part of her didn't want to believe Kaidame either. And yet, maybe it was time to accept, to not live in denial. If a path home opened up, she'd take it. But, until then, she would have to live here and now, not in the past and not in the future. 

What sort of life would she be able to have, though? Probably...probably nothing more than what was already waiting for her: an empty hut at the edge of a village. She wasn't one for company, but to live out the rest of her life like that chilled her to the bone with dread. Gods be damned! She may not have had any family back home she wasn't estranged from, but she'd had plans. She might have been lost in mourning, looking for direction after her father had passed, but she'd known what she ultimately wanted out of life. She'd always known. And she hadn't given it an ounce of thought. She'd never allowed herself to picture that far ahead because it had been completely useless until she figured out what to do about the immediate future. But now, when that lonely future was staring her directly in the face, she felt an edge of panic creeping in. Automatically, she reached for another twig. It was larger, more of a branch, and she snapped it over her knee with unnecessary force that made the bone ache, but relaxed the threatening hysteria. 

"Enough!" 

Lucidity jerked her head up. Sesshomaru had been a silent silhouette against the darkening sky since before she'd had the fire going. His back had been facing her while he stood a short distance away, watching the setting sun as he so often did. But now he was peering over a shoulder at her, just enough that she could make out his profile and a single, golden eye fixed on her. 

"If you wish to vent your frustrations, do so elsewhere."

And that was that. He turned away without saying another word and Lucidity watched him longer than the situation called for. It wasn't as if she believed he would offer anything beyond his stoicism, but the harsh indifference still wasn't appreciated. Back at the village she would receive a better welcoming, sympathy and hopeful suggestions, probably more than she'd be able to stomach. Kagome, Sango, and the others would remain optimistic-except Inuyasha, she was sure-at least for a short while. But, for now, she knew they would continue searching, undoubtedly starting with the Isle. And Lucidity would go with it, because she had no choice. She really would have to put one foot in front of the other. As tempting as it was, as simple as it could be, succumbing to hysterical tears or falling into a pit of despair would be of no help. (It wouldn't be surprising if this aversion of letting everything in was the result of some deep seated psychological scarring, but for now she preferred seeing it as survival mode.) 

Dragging herself out of her thoughts, Lucidity picked up the pack laying next her-glad she'd had the frame of mind to grab the thing before Sesshomaru had spirited them off of Mount Fukuro-when her hand froze in the midst of digging for her journal. She'd remembered the pack, but had forgotten.... He'd taken it from her. She couldn't recall seeing it on his person when they left in such a hurry. Had he tucked it away somewhere? 

"Sesshomaru, where's the scroll?" 

He glanced back at her, but didn't answer. 

"The map," she reiterated. "Where is the map?" 

"With Kaidame." 

"What?!" She was on her feet and Sesshomaru deigned to turn around finally. "I thought you had it. Why did you leave it behind?" Though she didn't much care to travel to yet another destination, especially with knowing that it would not yield what she truly wanted, she had lost a prized possession all the same in the effort to gain that stupid scroll. 

"It was of no use," he replied. 

"How is going to the Isle of no use?" she demanded. "Who are you to make that decision for me?" 

The narrowing of eyes was her only warning before she blinked and he was suddenly standing right in front of her. She jumped back and her foot caught on the pack, sending her toppling to the ground. A hand shot out and seized her by the upper arm, jerking her upright and uncomfortably close to the daiyoukai, who did not release her. 

"Apparently I am the fool who keeps saving the life of an ungrateful human," he said in a low voice that resonated right down to her bones. "Do not make me regret the decision." 

She snorted. "Yeah, you have saved me a few times. But considering your mother killed me, I think we're pretty much even on that," she said. "Not to mention that I would never have been tangled up with the vipers if it wasn't for you. They're your enemy, not mine. The only reason they came after me was because I helped you. It would have been bad form on your part if you hadn't saved me. And I know you're well aware of that, otherwise you wouldn't have looked after me like you did." 

Any potential pain was worth the expression on his face, something she could only describe as dumbstruck. He straightened, glaring down at her from what she considered an impressive height, lips curled just enough to reveal a set of clenched teeth. And he remained like that for several moments, not speaking, not doing anything but trying to stare her down and, to be frank, it wasn't working. A childish impulse to kick him in the shin and tell him to admit that she was right was quickly quashed; he would definitely throw her for that. And then she suddenly regretted not giving in to the impulse when he reached down and snagged the remaining necklace out from under her tunic. He took the pendant in a fist and lifted it high enough to force her head up, lest the chain snap. 

"What the hell-" she began, gripping onto his wrist with one hand, the other pushing against his chest. 

"So that you understand, I will make this clear to you," he said, his tone so evenly measured, even as his gaze bore into her. "I did not say the Isle was of no use, only the map, which I examined before our departure, a matter made necessary by your idiotic choices." His careful mask began to fracture further with lines of anger that were starting to become rather familiar. "If you were not so irrational over your accessories, I would have the information I needed by now. I will not abide being marked by an entity that seeks to use me for its own purpose. I would know what it is and remove the burden it has branded me with. Yet because you would not part with a simple adornment," his hand tightened on the necklace, "I am now forced to make a journey that boarders the territory of another Clan I have no desire to encounter." The chain dug into her neck as he pulled harder. "What is your absurd attachment to this worthless thing?"

Damn. He was seriously pissed. And her neck was seriously starting to hurt. She found herself being forced to take a step or two closer, much to her dismay, as she strained against the iron grip and tried to ensure that the necklace didn't break at the same time. Both her hands were now spread over the cold breastplate of Sesshomaru's armor, nails scraping against the metal. She tried to lower her head in the hopes of slipping free. The chain was long enough that she could have ducked out of it, maybe sacrificing a few strands of hair in the process, but soon realized that he was holding it too close to her throat, especially when he jerked her head back up with a growl. 

"Answer me," he ordered. 

"Why did you keep Tenseiga?" she hissed in return, meeting his glare with her own and saw him blink in surprise, some of the lines smoothing out. "You deemed the sword worthless. You never used it until you met Rin. Why keep it all those years?" Slowly, she felt the chain relax against her neck, but he still held the pendant. The back of his hand came to rest against the hollow of her throat and she swallowed, feeling the erratic heartbeat inside her chest, as he studied the ankh.

"It didn't belong to him," she told Sesshomaru in an effort to distract herself, and golden eyes flicked up to her face, the anger gone from his. "He gave me this when I was about nine, because I kept taking his, and I've worn it ever since." She reached up and slid the ankh out of Sesshomaru's grasp, pausing when his fingers twitched, as if he was quashing down his own impulse. Then the hand fell away and he let go of her arm. She stepped back and tucked the necklace away. "I kept nearly everything of his after he died, more than I could store, but this is all I have now. I was willing to part with it because I thought Kaidame could get me home, but...that's obviously not the case anymore."

Sesshomaru's brow furrowed and his lips thinned into a frown.

"You were so talkative a minute ago," she said, a little uncomfortable with this particular silence. "Don't you have anything to say now?" 

He looked at her a moment, during which she was more than ready to sit back down and bury her head in the sand for the rest of the night, until he murmured, "You are still an insufferable woman." 

It was her turn to blink, staring at him, before she grinned in spite of herself. "Why, Sesshomaru, if I didn't know any better I'd say you were trying to cheer me up. I didn't realize you cared so much."

He scowled. "Do not presume to know my thoughts, woman." 

"Ah, come on," she said as he started to walk away. "Are we really going back to that, Fluffy?" 

The air crackled and a rush of energy washed over her.

She didn't really have a clear memory of drawing it, but the sword was in her hand. The blade came up, countering the Whip and knocking it away. (Weapons made from daemons certainly had advantages.) She smiled at Sesshomaru, whose momentary pause gave way to a flicker of annoyance. He raised an arm and, with a sweeping motion that was rather lazy in her opinion, struck out again with the Whip. Twice more and that was all it took. The sword flew from her grasp and landed some yards away, point down in the soft earth, as if somehow to drive the message home of just how superior the youkai lord was. She raised her hands level with her shoulders in a gesture of defeat, still smiling a faint smile.

That had been fun. Just reacting to the attack had been exhilarating, even if it wasn't lethal, more like playful banter. She had not needed to see the gathering energy around his hand or notice how his fingers curled. She'd known what was coming, but enjoyed it all the same, enjoyed that she'd been fast enough to at least catch him by surprise. And now it was over. A fleeting moment of reprieve that allowed her to forget about the concerns of life. Sesshomaru could amuse her, however unintentionally, but it never lasted long and he didn't have the patience for her "nonsense." She wished it could last, but that was like asking life to be fair. Already she could feel the elation fading as the moment passed and reality sank its teeth back into her. 

"Your skill leaves much wanting," he said.

She shrugged and lowered her arms. "I've been training for less than a year. It's to be expected."

"But not acceptable," he replied. "Pick up your sword."

"Huh? You don't mean-"

"If you intend to continue traveling in my company, you will learn proper defense. I will not be bothered with saving you at every turn. Now pick up your sword."

His reasoning seemed perfectly understandable, but she still found herself staring incredulously. "You're joking."

He frowned.

"...you're not joking? I sense jokes," she muttered, knowing quite well that the film reference wouldn't make sense to him whether it was explained or not. Yet despite how utterly flabbergasted she was, not to mention a bit nervous, she walked over and pulled the sword out of the ground.

Lessons with Sesshomaru. She wondered if Sango would ever believe her.

* * *

The water was cool and refreshing on her warm skin, the taste so sweet and natural over her tongue. She drank deep and splashed her face, rubbed at the back of her neck, along her throat, letting the water drip down her tunic and chest. And it did absolutely nothing to alleviate the bone crushing exhaustion. It was completely dark out and Sesshomaru had run her ragged. Even after the sun disappeared and there wasn't a sliver of light remaining, other than the campfire, he'd moved them further out into the darkness to gauge her reflexes when her sight was removed from the equation. When she asked about taking a break, he refused and she endured in silence for quite a bit before eventually cracking and saying she needed to stop for the night. It had taken a while longer, and the threat of telling everyone he'd played nursemaid, before he finally relented. By the end of it, she was wondering if this "training" had been a devious plot of revenge to work out the rest of his anger.

Lucidity dropped down in front of the fire, letting gravity take her until she was laying flat on her back, arms stretched above her head, and stared up at the blanket of stars through heavy lashes. At least until a cloud of white entered her field of vision and she opened her eyes to find Sesshomaru peering down at her. Not a scratch or speck of dust to show for his troubles. It was irritating. She remembered how much it had hurt driving her knuckles into his jaw, like punching a wall. Tonight had been no different. That little sparring session had her aching all over.

"There is little hope for improvement if this is how you react when your capabilities are merely being tested," he said. "Humans are remarkably weak."

She gave a soft snort and closed her eyes. "Don't wear high heels and complain that you're feet hurt."

"Speak plainly, woman."

A sigh broke from her. "Don't decide to train humans and then complain that they are not as powerful as youkai. We don't have the advantage of energy whips or being strong enough to support boulders on our backs. Besides, I've had a long day and deserve a little respite." She absently rubbed her head, only to let out a soft hiss of pain when she touched the cut by accident. The sound of footsteps told her that Sesshomaru was walking around her. But when she felt the brush of fur near her leg, she opened her eyes and saw that he had sat down beside her.

"Your injuries, how do they fair?" he asked, his gaze on the fire.

"Fine," she said. "Whatever medicine Kaidame gave me helped. I wouldn't have agreed to your little impromptu tests otherwise."

Regardless of her exhaustion, she was coherent enough to believe she wasn't over analyzing him; he was definitely acting weird. At least she had managed to calm him down, telling him the one thing he'd be able to relate to without taking her head off. Or perhaps she simply didn't know him well enough to make a judgment call of personality. Everything she knew about him she'd heard from different people. The rest was observation, which was conflicting at best at this point.

"Do you really plan on going to the Isle with me?" she asked.

"I familiarized myself with the map; you did not. Your options are limited."

"That's not what I asked. And you could always just tell me where to go," she told him.

The familiar creases in his expression betrayed his irritation at her poking holes. "I have already told you my reasons."

"Yes, but-"

"Enough. I will not be answering your pointless questions."

She huffed. "Fine. How about telling me who the Four Sisters are instead? That's not pointless, is it?"

"Indeed, not," he conceded, closing his eyes for a moment before looking over at her. "Pray that should you cross their path that they mean you no harm. And if they do, you had best make peace with death."

Frowning, she pushed herself up onto her elbows. His reaction back at Mount Fukuro had been surprising, but his words now were alarming. "You're not...." She trailed off, but the hardened look in his gaze let her know that he understood the implication of the mute question.

"The Sisters are buried in myth," he said. "My only factual knowledge of them came from my father, who found himself in near the border of their Isle before I was born. He told me he lived by their good graces alone. Countless others fell to the Sisters, youkai and human, powerful and weak. None could equal them. And yet he was spared on a whim."

Lucidity, sitting completely upright, could think of only one thing to say: "How fortunate for you."

Sesshomaru didn't reply, nor go into any further detail about the Sisters. Not that it was needed. Traveling to the Isle was even less appealing, frightening to a degree, after hearing this small amount of intell Sesshomaru could provide. She didn't get the impression that he was truly afraid, but he was without a doubt uneasy with the prospect of encountering such powerful beings whom even if his father hadn't wished to upset. And that, in turn, made her anxious. She knew she wouldn't, and couldn't, go without him. 

"So, does anyone know who or what they are exactly?" she asked. "Where they came from? Anything like that?" 

"Rumors only." 

"How long has it been since they've been seen?" 

As Lucidity watched, waiting for an answer, Sesshomaru cast his gaze to the sky. Tired as she was, both mentally and physically, she found she did not want to sleep just yet. Sitting side-by-side with a daiyoukai who had not so much as bothered to say her name when they first met was surprisingly calming, especially when she considered every twist and turn that was thrown their way. A couple hours ago he was literally at her throat. Now he was asking if old wounds were still bothering her. Hot and cold, that was what he was. A burning passion wrapped in layers of control and arrogance that broke free in displays of fury. Dangerous. Lethal. And every ounce the wrong sort of exciting. 

"Seven, perhaps eight centuries," said Sesshomaru. 

It took Lucidity a moment to realize she'd been expecting an answer to a question she had already forgotten. But once she remembered, she shook her head, wondering how on earth she would find creatures of legend, who hadn't been around for the better part of a millennia, even with the help of a daiyoukai. Dragging her knees up so she could prop an elbow against her leg, she leaned her head in her hand and closed her eyes. 

"This is insane," she muttered. "How could I have anything to do with the Sisters? It's ridiculous." 

"We are in agreement." 

A grunt broke from her, but she said nothing else. Fingers buried in her hair, she rubbed at her scalp, as though attempting to massage unwanted thoughts out of her mind. She could hear the crackle and pop of the fire, feel the heat of the flames washing over her, smell the wood smoke that wafted off in waves. Soothing it was, more than adequate to break her concentration and cause the exhaustion sink in. Thoughts soon became scattered. She was aware of what was happening around her, in the same way a person is aware that he is in a dream, but does not want to wake. 

"Lady out of time," a voice echoed. 

Lucidity jerked and her head shot up, eyes open but unfocused. She blinked until the fire came into view and glanced over at Sesshomaru, who was watching her with a blank expression. "What did you say?" she asked.

He frowned, apparently annoyed that she'd been nodding off on him, and looked back at the fire. "Go to sleep. You are of no use to me as you are." 

"Your concern is touching," she muttered, but admitted defeat as she looked around for her pack, only to spot it on the other side of the fire. Her shoulders slumped. Dammit. That involved moving. She glanced at Sesshomaru and immediately dismissed the idea of asking him; even Jaken would not have fetched something a handful of feet away just because she was too lazy to get up. But then her gaze fell to the length of fur over Sesshomaru's shoulder that spilled onto the ground beside him. She wondered.... 

"What are you staring at?" 

The question made her start. "Nothing," she was quick to say. 

"I see what you mean." Golden eyes slid over to her. "You are a terrible liar." 

Much to her horror, a heat crept over her cheeks and she turned her head away at once. Darkness didn't matter when it came to youkai eyes, she knew, and could only pray he had not seen. This was stupid! She should have just walked over and laid down where the pack was. Deciding that was the best plan of action, she moved to stand, unraveling her legs and bracing herself with a hand on the ground. Yet just as she was about to rise, she felt a yank on the back of her tunic and, off balance, was easily brought down, gasping as she found herself on her back, head resting on the fur. Not exactly how she would have planned it. 

Sesshomaru leaned over, silver hair tumbling forward and creating a curtain around her face. She stared up at him, breathing heavily through her nose, and wondered how good his ears were in comparison with the rest of his senses. Could he hear how fast her pulse was racing? She swallowed, not daring to move, curious what would happen if she did...or did not. 

"Your balance is one of your better skills," he said. "And that was pitiful. Now explain yourself." 

"I...er...." She took a breath and shifted, the heels of her boots pushing against the ground. She noticed his eyes flick down at the movement, then back to her face. Once more, she looked away. "I was just wondering if...if I could sleep here, on your fur again." 

A brief silence greeted her words until he said something didn't make any sense at all: "Mokomoko." 

In spite of her nervousness, she glanced back at him. "What?" 

"Mokomoko," he repeated. "That is what my fur is called. And it is not your bed."

"I'm...already laying on it," she said with a tentative smile. 

"That can be easily remedied." 

She didn't move. Neither did he. Her smiled widened a bit. She really didn't know what was going through his mind, but he didn't seem annoyed. 

"Well?" she pressed, half expecting to be flung off any second. "It's your fault I'm down here to begin with. Not that I'm complaining; it's pretty comfortable." 

He gave a soft snort and straightened. "Impudent woman," he muttered. "Do what you will." 

She stared, but he was watching the fire again. He seriously wasn't kicking her to the other side of their little camp? He wasn't even going to toss her off his fur, this mokomoko? Part of her considered abandoning this insanity and using her pack as a pillow as she did every night. But this really was so damn comfortable and he was letting her. She didn't know why, couldn't understand it, but there was no reason to look a gift horse in the mouth, right?

Rolling onto her side so that her back was to the fire, she curled up as she did most nights, usually with Kirara tucked against her stomach. This night, however, it was the fur of a daiyoukai and she'd be lying if she said it meant nothing more than convenient spot to sleep. He was letting her rest on him. He was training her so she could better protect herself. He hadn't wanted to kill her, even though it would have meant trapping himself and his own mother otherwise. And unlike him, she'd have done the exact opposite.

Not anymore, she thought, feeling a hard clench inside her chest that made her shudder. She squeezed her eyes shut and burrowed her face deeper into the fur. Why couldn't she learn? How many times did she have to tell herself that it was pointless to connect with anyone here? But that was...that was before going to see Kaidame, before hearing from a Seer, who did not lie, that there were no paths home. Did that mean...could this be....? Was this her silver lining, allowing herself to become attached to the people here?

Another shiver raced through her and she drew her knees in closer. She couldn't be certain what she was feeling. Her stomach was a mess of knots and her heart kept doing a tap dance against her ribs. The fire was so close and yet she felt alternating waves of heat and cold. Was this excitement? Dread? Mostly she felt confused, so very confused. And tired. Yes, very, very tired. The more she tried to think, tried to make sense of everything, the more the exhaustion ate away at her until thoughts became swirls of empty colors in her mind and her surroundings fell away as sleep finally took her.

She awoke once during the night, barely aware enough to roll onto her back, vaguely curious about the soft warmth around her. And, just as quickly, she drifted off again, but not before she felt the mokomoko being laid across her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who got the film reference? XD It's not an exact quote, I know, but close!


	17. Chapter 17

"No, Jaken."

"I'm only asking for two. You have a full stack. Why can't you part with two?"

"You threw the last four pages I gave you into the fire."

"There were too many mistakes and the pages were ruined."

"That's because you decided to have a tantrum and tore them up. I could have used the scraps to make more and you burned them, so the answer is no."

"Fine. I won't do that next time. Now hand the paper over."

Jaken grabbed the journal out of Lucidity's hands, only for her to snatch it back and smack him upside the head with it. Beside her, Kirara lifted her head, watching the interaction with large, red eyes.

"Ow!" he yelped. "You said you wouldn't do that anymore."

"You're lucky I don't discipline you like any other child who takes without asking. I actually _was_ going to agree, but now you can sit there and draw your work in the dirt."

"That still doesn't change the fact that you're a liar. You said you wouldn't attack me again and you did. Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken whirled around to address the daiyoukai, who was sitting beneath the shade of a tree. "Isn't anything going to be done about this? She broke her promise to you. She should be punished!"

Lucidity slammed the journal onto the ground with both hands, glaring at the toad that was making her see red so early in the day. "I will end you, Jaken! I swear by everything unholy, I will finish the job those men started and drown you in a river if you keep this up!"

"Ha! I will burn you to a crisp if you try!" he jeered in return, waving the Staff of Two Heads in her direction. "You and your precious book."

She jumped to her feet, hand on the hilt of her sword, barely noticing Kirara standing as well. "Turn that thing on me and I will cut your fucking arm off, you stupid toad."

The mouth of the old man clicked open and a flame sputtered to life. Light reflected off the blade as it began to leave its sheathe, only to stop halfway when the Staff was suddenly snatched out of Jaken's hands and the point of it brought down on his head, effectively pinning him to the ground.

"My lord, whyyyy?" he bemoaned at Sesshomaru's feet.

Lucidity slid the sword back in its scabbard and folded her arms as Sesshomaru leveled her with an appraising look.

"It seems that you are not in control of your emotions today," he said. "Is there a reason for this?"

She scowled, her arms tightening together, and muttered, "Might be."

"If you are aware of this, then you will make more of an effort to contain your anger."

"Fine! Just keep your little, green wart away from me," she snapped, snatching up her pack and stuffing the journal inside. For some reason, the mood to write had evaporated. She stalked over to where Ah-Un was grazing in the field and Kirara followed at her heels.

The afternoon following the encounter with Kaidame had brought the return of Jaken and the two four-legged youkai. Kirara, her health much improved, kept a constant watch over Lucidity, a small comfort with Jaken directing many a foul mood toward her after learning she would be staying with them longer. Today was just not the best time to pick a fight with her.

A pain rolled through her lower back and Lucidity leaned against Ah-Un where she was attaching the pack to the saddle. Both heads looked around and she patted his side. That was all it took for the dragon to ignore her and go back to grazing. Lucidity stood there a moment, feeling the discomfort wrap around her middle and bringing about a shift in her stance in an unsuccessful attempt to relieve some of the ache. Well aware that it was hopeless, she squeezed the pack nonetheless, massaging the lumps inside and knowing full well that what she was looking for was not there. No willow bark to ease the pain. No medicinal vegetation at all to help relax muscles or anything of the sort. She was out of everything, right down to the dry travel food and it would take several more days to reach the village. That was the reason they had stopped: to find food and eat. But she hadn't had a chance to search for any plants.

Stepping away from Ah-Un, she peered over at the trees that lined the field. Maybe she could find something quick. She'd been irritable and in pain since she awoke. Actually, she'd been having pain for the last couple of days, but today was the worst. It even hurt to walk. And that was definitely a headache she could feel starting. Though not optimistic, she decided it wouldn't hurt to at least look and began making her way over to the forest. But when Kirara followed, she stopped.

"Wait here," Lucidity told her. Kirara mewled what could only have been a protest. "There are no other daemons here but you, and I won't be going far besides." Again, another mewl, but Kirara sat down on her haunches all the same. Lucidity took a moment to crouch down, in spite of her many aches, to scratch the furry, currently adorable youkai on top of the head and behind the ears before making her way into the forest.

Given time and room to breathe, Lucidity strolled between the trees, eyes sweeping the ground for signs of plants or roots that might be useful. When she returned to the village, she was going to crack down on those medicine lessons with Kaede. Less than a month with Sesshomaru and she'd been injured more times than all months spent in the village combined. A hand absently went to her neck where the bruise from the viper bite was still healing. She didn't know how much time she would have, though, to learn. At some point, she and Sesshomaru would travel to the Isle. Yet it had been decided that a reprieve was needed for Lucidity, to fully recover and not to mention restock on supplies. Sesshomaru had been reluctant, as returning to the village instead of going directly to the Isle had been her idea, until she pointed out that everyone was expecting her to return before long and if she didn't, there was a good chance they would come searching for her. The prospect of interference from Inuyasha and his group put a stop to any further protests from the youkai lord.

To be honest, Lucidity was looking forward to a few days of relaxation, a few nights spent with a roof over her head while she slept in a place she had become familiar with. She may still hold the fear that the rest of her life would be spent in the hut she currently sought sanctuary in, but she was returning to it with the knowledge that her stay would be for a handful of nights, at least for the time being. When she was journeying back from the Isle, she would be not be as eager to reach the village, even if it meant she had a home to return to. Another silver lining that she tried to focus on: always having a place to go back to.

A breeze kicked up around her and tossed her hair across her face. She raked her fingers through the locks and pulled them out of her eyes, stopping for a moment to survey the area. Shit, she thought. How far had she wandered? She turned around and spotted some open sky back through the trees, which at least told her the way out. Shaking her head at her inattention, she changed direction so she was walking parallel to the field, rather than deeper into the forest, and went back to scanning the ground, only to go rigid when a chill ran down her spine.

Lucidity ducked just as the familiar tendril of energy shot past her head. Her back screamed in protest as she spun around, still crouching and very much seething. Sesshomaru stood serenely between a pair of trees, the sleeve of his haori fluttering around his hand as he lowered his arm to his side.

"I see that your vigilance has returned," he said. "Had I been an enemy, you would be dead several times over."

Cursing and rubbing her lower back, she rose to her feet. "Dammit, not now. I'm not in the mood and in case you haven't noticed-"

"I have noticed," he interrupted. "And it is an opportunity for you to learn how to endure pain in a fight."

"Sesshomaru-" 

"No arguments; I have told you this before," he said, unsheathing Tenseiga, the only sword that could not cut the living and perfect for the situation.

Still, Lucidity was not happy about having to dodge the blade and drawing her own weapon to deflect the next blow. The trees were a bit of an obstacle as she tried to find better ground, but widespread enough that she at least didn't have to worry about tripping over roots. Blood pounding in her ears, she succumbed to the unwanted training session as Sesshomaru came at her again and again. She was almost always on the defensive, always trying to counter his attacks. His strength and speed intimidated her and she wasn't ashamed to admit it. Against a regular youkai she would have been nervous, but Sesshomaru was another class altogether and part of her still couldn't understand why he would ever train someone, especially a human. She hadn't even asked Jaken to get his opinion. And the times that she and Sesshomaru had sparred since the imp's return were far removed from his company like now, so it was doubtful he even knew.

Frustrated and hurting and wanting nothing more than to find some damn herbs for the pain, Lucidity made a slash dangerously close to Sesshomaru's face when she saw an opening, hoping that he would get the message that she done with this little session. The next thing she felt was the hilt of Tenseiga being driven into her stomach with enough force to knock the wind out of her. An arm of steel wrapped around her middle as she doubled over in agony, gasping and pulling sharp lungfuls of air into her body, and the sword falling from her suddenly limp grasp. Shit, she thought, trying to find her footing. One blow and she was immobilized. Couldn't he see how useless this was? She'd never be able to survive a real fight against a youkai; she'd barely survived against two humans.

"That was foolish," said a voice in her ear.

She jerked her head away, scowling and panting heavily. "I told you I wasn't in the mood."

Without warning, something cold and heavy slid upward across her body, along her neck, and came to rest against her face. Her first impulse was to stand on tiptoe and lean as far away as possible when she realized that it was the flat of Tenseiga's blade pressed to her cheek. She knew the sword couldn't hurt her, but goddamn! That sharp edge was right next to her eye! When she blinked, she could feel her lashes brush the steel and immediately turned her head to the side.

"Your mood makes no difference when your survival is at stake," Sesshomaru said. "Understand that these lessons are not for the enjoyment of watching you struggle. I would have you learn so that you are better able to protect yourself in my absence. Or are you so inconvenienced by my efforts that you would seek to remove my sight from me?"

The last words were spoken in a low, guttural voice that carried with it notes of his irritation that seared Lucidity's ears and reverberated through her body. She gritted her teeth and screwed her eyes shut, hands going to the arm around her waist, wishing he would let go already.

"If a sword to the face is the extent of your gratitude, perhaps I should not bother," he continued, but she was hardly paying attention at this point. She was still dancing on her tiptoes, uneasy with the blade against her cheek. At the same time, she was too conscious of the fact that she could feel the hard line of Sesshomaru's body against hers. Her heart was beating a maddened rhythm inside her chest, echoing from her ears down to her toes. How she hadn't fallen victim to some sort of heart condition by now was beyond her.

"You decided this on your own," she snapped. "I never asked for your help!" Maybe if she pissed him off enough, he'd just drop her. But no, instead he had to go and growl. An actual, fucking growl right in her ear that was coupled by a squeezing of his arm around her waist before he jerked her back against him, probably in an effort to scare her. Quite the opposite, in fact, when she let out a gasp and felt a throbbing tightness down below that brought a rush of heat to her face, to her entire body, and made her both want to moan and die of mortification on the spot.

Sesshomaru grew still behind her. His arm relaxed and Tenseiga was lowered, but he did not relinquish his hold. She suddenly became quite aware of his breathing, how his chest moved against her back, and felt the gust of each exhale down the side of her neck and-Shit! Was he leaning forward? Was he smelling her?! She was well aware that he could, but he didn't have to be so obvious about it! Without the blade holding her in place, she turned her head away, letting her hair fall forward like a curtain between them.

"You should learn better control," he murmured. "That scent can entice youkai for miles, letting us know that we have found the perfect prey."

"[Son of a bitch!]" she shrieked, face burning, writhing in the grasp he refused to loosen. "Let go! LET GO OF ME! I swear to the gods, Sesshomaru, I will-"

"You have nothing to threaten me with," was his deep, haughty reply. Dammit, was he enjoying this?! "I suggest you calm yourself so that we might resume-"

"I will lock your ass in that goddamn vault, Sesshomaru!" she shouted. "I mean it! I won't rest until I find another urn to seal you in and let you enjoy a good long stint in there. A few centuries sound good. Maybe if I feel generous, I'll leave a set of instructions for your mother to find so she can get you out. That is if she isn't still angry with you for threatening to lock her back up."

Silence. Lucidity was painfully conscious of every last detail of the daiyoukai, from the silver strands mixing with her blonde hair, to the smooth skin of his arm beneath her hand. He was utterly unyielding, a solid wall of power the only served as a reminder of how helpless she was in his grasp. Gods, why couldn't he just release her? Why did he have to taunt her, even acknowledge it? What was the point?! 

"Clever," he suddenly said and she shivered; his mouth was right against her ear and she couldn't turn her head any further.

And then she was free!

She stumbled forward as his arm disappeared and dropped to her knees, more out of the necessity of...well, knowing that her legs just couldn't support her right then. Her adrenaline was pumping too hard. She was far too flustered and pissed and embarrassed and.... She stiffened as she heard Sesshomaru walk around to stand in front of her, sheathing Tenseiga as he went. Hands on her thighs, she glared at the ground. He better not suggest that they continue. She really would stab him this time!

But he didn't suggest that. He didn't say a word, in fact, or move or anything! The longer she knelt there, the more ridiculous she felt. It was like a staring contest without the staring. She swallowed, feeling the rhythmic beat echoing throughout her body and the pulling ache that was, by the blessed gods, starting to recede with his no longer touching her. Not knowing what else to do and realizing how stupid it was not wanting to look at him when he clearly already knew what was troubling her, she took a breath and leaned back on her heels, lifting her head to meet that golden gaze. Yes, he was staring right at her and she wasn't surprised in the least. There was a slight quickening of the pulse and she had to swallow again to help calm herself, but she didn't look away. His expression was smooth. Not cold or indifferent, but serene. Shouldn't he be curling his lip or saying something to further embarrass her or growing impatient and demanding that she get up? Why did he just have to stand there and make her guess?

Staring contests weren't her thing, she decided, as she dropped her gaze in the end. She was tired of guessing, tired of wondering, and tired of worrying that it was all in her head. Whatever was happening, she should put it from her mind. There were more important things going on. Viper Clans and rising power and strange entities that burned and branded for fun. Letting out a slight scoff, she looked around for her sword, ready to leave, when a noise gave her pause. Sesshomaru had stepped forward until he was not even a foot from her. And when she lifted her head, he extended a hand, just as he had done at the cliff. Yet unlike the cliff, there was no reason for his help. She could stand on her own, but he was offering and, somehow, this small gesture surprised her more than his decision to train her, even after his taunts. Or maybe he hadn't been taunting at all. More likely than not, he really could have been serious when telling her to learn control and calm herself. 

Regardless of her doubts, of all logical protests that screamed she should ignore anything and everything that wasn't of significance, Lucidity took Sesshomaru's hand for nothing more than the simple reason that she wanted to. He drew her to her feet with absolutely no effort on his part, and didn't let go. Lucidity stared a moment at their clasped hands, before pulling away. This time, he let her. His gaze lingered a moment, then he turned and began making his way back to the field.

"Are you coming?" he called over his shoulder when she didn't move.

Not knowing what else to do, Lucidity retrieved her sword and sheathed it as she followed him out of the forest. Whatever the hell just happened, it was clear they were not going to talk about it, just like they didn't talk about anything else that wasn't relevant. Or, at least, that was how it should be. And that was the reason it was so startling when Sesshomaru unexpectedly stopped at the edge of the trees and asked a question so out of the blue.

"Do you intend to stay at the village?"

She stared at the line of his back from where she stood behind him. "You mean, after we're done with the Four Sisters? Yeah, that's the plan."

He peered back at her. "Why?"

"Where else would I go?" she replied, baffled. 

Yet, before he could respond, they heard a familiar voice shouting, "Sesshomaru-sama? Shouldn't we be on our way? Where are you? You haven't left me behind again have you?! Sesshomaru-sama?!"

Without another word, the daiyoukai stepped out onto the field where Jaken was leading Ah-Un by the reigns and Lucidity followed, bewildered, but unwilling to find out why he would ask such a thing.

* * *

"Let me go find Rin for you, my lord, so you don't have to set foot in this awful place." 

"That won't be necessary." 

"But, my lord-" 

"Silence, Jaken." 

Lucidity glanced over at master and servant, who were lingering around Ah-Un, then back up the path Kirara had taken. The village spread out below them, the rolling landscape and rice fields a sight that was both comforting and daunting. This was a place she was familiar with and knew what to expect. And at the same time, she felt as if she was staring into a bleak future that was nothing but a quiet, everyday life that would be no more than what it was now. She would get to play farmer, villager, and spinster until the end of her days. Perhaps, if she was fortunate, she could play wife to whatever poor bastard would have a foreigner in this ancient world. She didn't exactly care about marriage, but if it meant not being alone, she might consider it. 

Jaken stalked past her, his shoulders hunched. She didn't need to see the glower he cast her way to know that he was upset. He gave an arrogant "hmph!" when he noticed her watching and turned his nose up while he walked away; she could only hope that he tripped. 

"You hesitate to return," Sesshomaru said as he came to stand beside her. 

Lucidity shouldered her pack and clutched the hilt of the sword at her waist. 

"You have cleaned the weapon thoroughly," he told her. "There is no trace of blood that I can detect." 

Which meant that Inuyasha wouldn't smell anything either, so that was one worry she needn't think on. "I think I will always hate it here," she said. 

"The village or this era?" 

"Both," she muttered. "Having everything you ever worked for stripped from you will do that to a person. There's nothing down there but four walls made of wood on the edge of some backwater community, which I suppose I should be grateful for, but...." 

"You wish for more," Sesshomaru finished for her when she became quiet. 

Lucidity peered up at him. "Yeah, but life doesn't always turn out like we plan, does it?" 

He glanced at her, then started down the path. Too accustomed to his mannerisms to put much thought in the lack of response, she fell into step next to him. They walked in silence down to the village and soon reached the rice fields and veered off onto one of the many dirt paths that ran alongside them, passing by several huts. These were not in the area that Lucidity lived in. Her hut was on the other side of the village, which meant that most of the villagers would catch sight of her, probably call her aside, before she could settle in and inspect any damage the heathen children might have caused in her absence; hopefully Rin had kept the little hellions out for the most part. 

To her relief, people didn't speak to or even approach her. Not everyone was unfriendly. Several people waved in greeting, familiar faces she usually traded with. But when a woman named Himara and her young daughter, whom Lucidity had provided herbs with when the latter had had a fever, didn't even come out of their hut, despite waving and smiling enthusiastically, Lucidity suddenly realized what the change in variable was. 

"No one is talking to me because of you," she said to Sesshomaru, whose brow drew down a fraction.

"If you wish me to leave-" 

"No, no! I'm not complaining," she said quickly. "I just think it's kinda funny. I don't want to be bothered right n-" 

"Lucidity!" 

Sesshomaru slid his arms into the sleeves of his haori. "You were saying?" 

"Shut up," she mumbled, peering around to see who had called her name, then caught sight of Kirara in full form gliding down from the air, bearing on her back a small horde. 

Sango, Miroku, and Rin all slid off Kirara, each carrying a precious load. Sango had her infant son on her back while her husband and Rin each held one of the twin girls. Lucidity brushed a hand through her hair, a bit exasperated at their timing, but not entirely unhappy at the sight of their broad smiles. Sango broke away first and gathered Lucidity in a hug that threatened to crush a rib or two; she kept forgetting how strong the woman was. Yet she returned the embrace regardless of the potential hazard to her health, still wondering what she'd done to make these people so fond of her.

"As soon as Kirara found us, we came looking for you!" Sango exclaimed as she stepped back, but kept her hands on Lucidity's shoulders, looking her over. The smile slipped from her face and she touched a hand to Lucidity's neck. "Those look like fang marks. What happened?" 

"Ah, long story," Lucidity said, a bit distracted at the sudden crying of the twin Rin was clutching; apparently Rin had attempted to introduce the toddler to Sesshomaru, who stood there, staring impassively, at the wailing bundle in bright green kimono. Lucidity couldn't stop herself from laughing. The daiyoukai shot her a quick glare, which of course only made her laugh harder. 

"Let me have her, Rin. There we go," said Miroku, taking both twins at once and giving Sesshomaru what he obviously believed was a winning smile. "Don't mind the little one; she's just cranky." 

Sesshomaru merely looked at the monk, then dropped his gaze back down to Rin. "Where is Jaken?" 

"Huh? He's not with you?" Rin asked, looking behind him as if the imp would appear out of thin air. 

Maybe he did trip and fall somewhere, Lucidity thought, neither hopeful, nor worried about the possibility. Still grinning, she turned back to Sango, who had taken the crying girl and was now attempting to calm her down. "Looks like you have your hands full," she said. "I can come by later, if you like, tell you and the others about everything that happened?" 

Sango, glancing between her and Sesshomaru, moved her daughter from one arm to the other and nodded. "That would be best. Er...Sesshomaru, I don't suppose you'd like-" 

"No," said the daiyoukai, who was peering out towards the fields.

If anything, Sango looked relieved at his refusal of the mandatory offer of hospitality that courtesy dictated, or so Lucidity assumed; she couldn't imagine any other reason for Sango to invite the youkai lord to a social sit down.

"Kagome and Inuyasha will be so glad to see you," she said, offering another smile.

Lucidity raised a brow. "Inuyasha? Really?" 

"Well," Miroku began, scratching his cheek and grinning nervously. "He was willing to track you down if you took much longer. Kagome has been really worried about you." 

"What? Why?" 

"I'm not sure, but it might be because-" 

Lucidity stiffened just as Miroku broke off and whirled around to face the path he and the others had followed here. Sesshomaru snapped his attention in the same direction, while Kirara's growl filled the air. The villagers went about their business. Pulling carts, washing clothes, cooking, inspecting the fields. Mundane activities. Everyday lives. And it left Lucidity feeling as if she was one of the few sane people left in the world, not understanding for a brief instant why so many others did not realize that something was wrong.

"What is it?" Sango asked, her voice sharp. "What's happening?"

"Sesshomaru-sama?" whispered an anxious Rin.

Before she realized what was happening, Lucidity had her arms full of the second twin and Miroku was sprinting away, shouting instructions. "People! There is danger coming this way. Everyone, you need to head for safety! Go now!" He gestured with his staff in the opposite direction. At first, the villagers stared, and then, one-by-one, began to drop what they were doing until they were hurrying in droves to obey the monk whom they clearly so trusted. Yet this was only a small portion of the village. Word was spreading as others raced off to inform the rest of the community, but it wasn't enough. Of course, that soon did not matter.

The first tremor as the earthquake began sent every last villager running for cover.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may all thank MyRegardstotheReader for this bit of fluff and humor with major underlining sexual tension scene. I wanted to write something between Kaidame and their return to the village and was coming up short until MyRegards suggested a little conversation between Lucidity and Sesshomaru about certain scents. XD Thank you!


	18. Chapter 18

"What is that? Where did it come from?" 

"I don't know, but it's huge! It's wrecking the entire village!" 

"There are Kagome and Inuyasha. Sango, take the children and get to safety!" 

Lucidity would have been happy to tell Miroku, as he dashed off, that the thing stomping around on every possible hut and food storage house in its path was a freaking lion, but there didn't seem to be any point. What a lion was doing in this country or what it had to do with a passing earthquake, she didn't know, but the beast was dangerous regardless of all that. And at this rate, the village would be decimated because Sango's calling this thing "huge" was an understatement. The red cladded figure wielding an impossibly large fang resembled more of an insect, jumping back and forth above the lion, as it crashed and tore its way towards them, trampling trees like blades of grass. From somewhere on the ground, a gleaming sacred arrow was launched, soaring through the air, only to bounce harmlessly off its target. Even from a distance, Inuyasha's curses could be heard; Tessaiga was not slowing the beast down at all.

Sesshomaru drew Bakusaiga. "Go," was all he said before he, too, launched himself into the fray. 

"Come on," called Sango, already on Kirara with Rin.

Lucidity, the toddler still in her grasp, dropped her pack, letting it fall where it may, then threw herself up behind Sango, and could do naught but brace as Kirara took to the air. The wind whistled through her ears and the oh-so-crippling fear threatened to overwhelm. Adrenaline pumping, Lucidity forced herself to focus on the little girl crying in her arms and the infant wailing with equal volume inches from her face. Below, she could hear the sounds of battle, the clanging of swords, a roar, and more cursing. Something about Inuyasha wanting Miroku and Kagome out of the way, and then he was shouting at Sesshomaru.

"Neither of them can use their weapons," Sango said, turning to watch. 

Lucidity grunted, staring somewhere at the woman's shoulder. "What do you mean?" 

"Sesshomaru and Inuyasha, they can't unleash the full attacks of Bakusaiga or Tessaiga this close to the village. There are too many people and they could destroy everything. And-Oh no! Kirara, move!" 

With a roar, Kirara increased her speed and Lucidity, against all odds, managed to look down without falling right off and saw a paw larger than all of them swinging up through the air. Kirara was just barely able to get out of range, but the lion continued to give chase with the youkai brothers closing in and Kagome and Miroku following on foot.

"Why is it after us?!" Rin cried. 

"I don't know!" answered Sango, clutching her daughter tight and looking back. "Faster, Kirara!" 

"Sango!" Lucidity shouted, but it was too late. 

The lion had spun around and its tail, thicker than her body, arched through the air, coming straight at them. Lucidity felt the impact rattle in her bones. She could hear the others screaming, the children crying, and had no idea if her own voice joined the cacophony. The only conscious thing she was aware of was keeping her grip tightest on the child, and then holding onto whatever she else could as the world spun away. She could still feel Kirara beneath her, was quite certain she was either clinging to fur or possibly Sango. And then the ground raced up to meet them. She curled herself around the girl just as they hit. The air was knocked from her lungs. She was rolling and the girl was screaming. All around were blurs of color, glimpses of sky, people shouting. Another, deafening roar overhead.  

Lucidity's body had come to a stop, but her head was still spinning. She was laying on her back. The child was squirming on top of her, wailing, and she could hear the sounds of more crying. Something moved above her. Someone was running. She saw red, silver, white, and the unmistakable purple of Miroku's robes. Kagome was next to her suddenly, talking so rapidly to her that she was having trouble picking out the words. Lucidity pushed herself up, still clutching Sango's daughter and peered around. She was laying at the base of a hill. Further up, Sango was sitting upright with the other twin held tight to her chest, the infant squalling on her back. Miroku was beside her, looking both her and their children over. Higher still, Kirara was already on her feet, nudging Rin, who was on hands and knees and shaking her head.

Kagome shook her shoulder. "Lucidity, are you okay? Answer me. You didn't hit your head, did you?" 

"No, I-I'm fine," she managed to say, but was quite certain that her answer was drowned out by another roar of the beast, that was still so terribly close, despite the efforts of Sesshomaru and Inuyasha keeping it at bay. The lion was prancing back and forth, snapping its massive jaws, and knocked Inuyasha into the dirt with a powerful swipe. Kagome let out a gasp and was gone the next instant, running towards the battle, bow and arrow at the ready. 

"Here." It was Miroku. He took his still wailing daughter from Lucidity and offered a hand to help her stand. 

"Is everyone okay?" she asked once she was on her feet. 

"Yeah," he said, but she could see how pale he was. "I'm of no use in this fight. Maybe with my Kazaana, but that thing, whatever it is, isn't a youkai like any I've ever come across. My sutras, Kagome's arrows, nothing we do is having any affect on it. And neither Inuyasha nor Sesshomaru can get through its hide." 

Lucidity blinked. A lion with impenetrable skin? Yet before she could say anything, Sango came rushing over. With a quick look around to ensure that everyone was in one piece, she grabbed her husband by the arm.

"Come on, Lucidity!" she shouted, while running uphill with Miroku and their children towards Kirara and Rin, the latter of whom was astride on the two-tailed youkai again. "We need to go while there's still time." 

Though she wondered if it was at all possible for Kirara to carry so many, Lucidity started after them, only to stumble when the lion let out a scream of a roar so fierce that her eardrums threatened to burst. Covering her ears, she peered up at the monstrous sight and felt her stomach drop as she saw its long shadow stretching over the ground. It was leaping high, high into the air, right over the hill, sparing no glance to the others as it came down, its blazing, orange eyes fixed on her. 

With a shout, Lucidity dived out of the way before its gigantic paw could crush her into a crimson spot on the grass. Yet it wasn't quick reflexes or any amount of tumbling and rolling and running that saved her life. It was the burst of flames that scorched the earth between her and the lion that caused the beast to rear back and snarl its frustration. 

"Take that, you stupid cat!" Jaken screeched, holding his Staff aloft and jumping down from Ah-Un. As fire continued to spew from the old man's mouth, the imp glared up at her. "What are you waiting for? Take Ah-Un and get out of here. You're in the way!"  

Wherever that little bugger had disappeared to until now, Lucidity didn't care. She could have squeezed the life out of him with a hug of overwhelming gratitude, but settled for leaping onto the dragon instead. She caught sight of Inuyasha and Sesshomaru squaring off with the lion once more as Ah-Un bore her into the air, then spotted Kagome still on the ground and firing off another arrow. She leaned over one of the two necks, knowing she would have to shut her eyes and trust Ah-Un to take her to safety. Just to reassure herself before she did so, she quickly glanced over to where Kirara was spiriting everyone else away. 

"Get back here, you mangy feline!" 

Inuyasha's shout drew her attention back to the ground. As fast as Ah-Un could fly, the lion was running right below and paying no heed to the brothers, Jaken, or Kagome. Granted, only Inuyasha and Sesshomaru seemed to be able to keep pace with the beast, which seemed rather transfixed on those attempting to fly out of its reach. Yet it appeared to Lucidity, who was certain she wasn't losing her mind, that the lion was focusing its beady eyes on her. Grabbing onto Ah-Un's reins, she pulled. The dragon tossed its heads and changed direction at her command. The lion changed direction, too, and followed her as she broke away from the others. 

She had no idea what was going on. There was no time to stop and think or wonder or even fear. "Faster," she urged Ah-Un and felt the dragon put on a fresh burst of speed with her bent low and clinging on for all she was worth. Away from the village, away from the people. Those were the only thoughts swirling through her head. Get the beast out in the open, where one of those damn, powerful than thou brothers could finish it. The land swept past in a vision of endless color. Heart echoing in her ears, Lucidity could feel the reins sliding between her sweaty hands, hear the pounding of the beast below, and another roar, so loud, so close, so deafening that she pressed her palms hard over her ears once more. But Ah-Un didn't have such a luxury. The heads shook, knocked together. His speed faltered. He began to drop, lower and lower. Lucidity peered down wildly and saw the lion almost level with them, closing in. Then it leapt forward, jaws wide and open, fangs extended, massive tongue curling in its mouth, almost twice her size. 

Her body reacted before she did. She was crouched on the saddle rather than sitting astride it, sword in hand, before she realized what she was doing. With the reins still held in the other hand, she drove the blade upward, but could smell the putrid breath on her face. So close. Too close. She would be eaten in one bite! Not even a bite. It would swallow her whole! And no amount of hacking and slicing would free her from such a grave.

The lion jerked back with a roar of pain as her sword was driven into the roof of its mouth and lodged there. Lucidity became aware of this only after it batted Ah-Un out of the sky like nothing more than an irksome fly. The reins slipped from her sweaty grip and she was falling with nothing to hold onto. The ground was about to become her friend again, only this time from a greater height, a fatal height. The taste of fear was like acid in the back of her mouth and she could only pray that it was quick. 

Arms wrapped around her. Strong. Unyielding, like the rest of him. White fur obscured her vision. She might have let out a sound, some strangled noise of relief, as Sesshomaru brought her to the ground. 

"You stupid woman!" he snarled in a low voice. "What were you thinking?" 

She lifted her head, not fully comprehending, and saw his face tight with anger. But before she could respond, Inuyasha came to a skidding stop next to them, Kagome on his back and great fang still in hand. Neither of them were looking at her or Sesshomaru, however, but at the lion, which was tossing its head, jaws wide open, with blood streaming out of its mouth and smeared along its paws from its attempts to dislodge the sword.

"Shit," Inuyasha said as Kagome climbed off of him. "What did you do?" 

"Sword. Mouth," was all Lucidity could get out, leaning against Sesshomaru while she tried to calm herself; she was shaking so hard.

"You mean its vulnerable from the inside?" asked Kagome. "I bet one of my arrows will work if I fire into its mouth." 

"You think so?" Inuyasha said. "If we can get close enough-" 

"The creature is mine," Sesshomaru said sharply, his voice still rough and both Inuyasha and Kagome looked at him in surprise. "If you interfere any further, Inuyasha, I will kill you." 

"What-HEY!" the hanyou shouted, but Sesshomaru was already striding away, leaving Lucidity staggering for a second when she found herself surrounded by nothing but open air.

"Are you okay?" Kagome asked, rushing over, bow slung over a shoulder.

Lucidity nodded, barely paying attention. She was too distracted by the sight of Sesshomaru so casually approaching the giant of a lion, which was still stumbling around, waving its head back and forth, snarling. Something seemed off and it wasn't until Sesshomaru stopped right in front of the beast that she noticed he'd returned Bakusaiga to its scabbard.

"What is he doing?!" she breathed.

"Ah, crap," said Inuyasha, sheathing Tessaiga. "We better give him some space or he'll end up trampling us."

Kagome climbed onto her husband's back and he was grabbing Lucidity before she could protest and bearing them both away. Lucidity craned her head around, already feeling the rush of energy emanating from the youkai lord. It wasn't just emanating, she decided, as his form coalesced into an aura of raw power that saturated the air and made her skin hum. It was fucking exploding! She saw the energy streaking back and forth through the air before slamming into the ground at the lion's feet. The moment Inuyasha stopped, she pushed herself off him.

"Gees, no need to thank me or anything," he muttered.

Lucidity ignored him as she stared, open mouthed, at the enormous canine towering before the lion. Pure white, a crescent moon upon his forehead, and those brilliant, scarlet eyes so savage and so very familiar. "[Holy shit,]" she murmured. "That's...that's his...."

"Yeah, his true form," Inuyasha sighed. "Damn glory hound."

"We should probably sit this one out," Kagome said, just as the daiyoukai drew back his impressive set of fangs and snapped his jaws at the lion. "He seems pretty mad."

"Keh!" scoffed Inuyasha, but folded his arms.

A thundering boom rang from the field as the two creatures collided, knocking over trees and sending boulders flying as if the great stones were mere pebbles. They tumbled over one another, a giant collection of fur and growls. The lion was roaring again, shaking its head, still bleeding profusely from the mouth, especially after Sesshomaru had clamped his jaws over its muzzle.

"You know, I've always been more of a cat person, but after this I think I will prefer dogs from now on," chimed in Miroku's voice from above them.

Lucidity looked up. The monk, his family, and Rin were all drifting down on Kirara, observing the spectacle with interest. So calm, all of them, though none dismounted. Were they just ensuring they could leave at a moment's notice should anything go sideways or was everyone so confident of Sesshomaru's abilities? It was really stupid of them to bring their children so close to the danger if it was the former.

A hacking, choking sound drew her attention back to the fight, frightening her for the briefest second, until she saw what was happening. Sesshomaru's jaws had shifted from muzzle to throat. The lion was on its back, flailing, and.... Actually, no, it wasn't flailing; Sesshomaru was shaking it like a rag doll. Orange eyes were bright with rage and fear, at least until the daiyoukai flung the beast up and over his head, causing the neck to twist and break in a crescendo of finality. The lion hit the earth, a warm, fresh corpse that stared with blank eyes and tongue lolling out its dead mouth. Sesshomaru held on for a while longer, his snarls drifting through the air, as he placed a massive paw onto the beast.

"Looks like he's trying to tear its throat out," said Inuyasha. "That hide is the toughest thing I've seen since Moryomaru's armor. Tessaiga didn't even make a scratch in it. You know, you were lucky, Lucidity, getting that shot in," he added. "I don't agree with Sesshomaru on a lot of things, but what he said was true: you were really stupid, going off alone. You nearly got yourself killed. What the hell were you trying to do?"

"You and Sesshomaru needed a clear shot, right?" Lucidity demanded with a glower. "For whatever reason, it was fixated on me. Figured I might as well get it away from the village."

Inuyasha stared. "You mean you were actually sticking your neck out for us, not running away?"

"No need to thank me or anything," she shot back, irritated at his shock. "Honestly, I'm not that cold at heart."

"You don't have a cold heart at all!" said Kagome. "That was really brave!"

"No, that was rash and idiotic!" piped up another voice. "Where is Ah-Un, woman? If you got him killed, Sesshomaru will-Oh my!"

The panting, wheezing imp, who had finally caught up and just noticed the death scene below, stumbled and stared at the magnificent sight of the great daiyoukai. Immediately tears welled up in those round eyes and he began to babble on about his lord of a master being so strong and knowing that he would defeat "that stupid cat" in the end. And now that the danger had passed, Jaken began to all but sprint his way to the battlefield, Staff held aloft. He skidded to a halt when Sesshomaru suddenly dropped the carcass and fixed those fierce eyes onto the collection of humans and daemons who had witnessed his latest kill.

As Lucidity studied this enormous, spine-chilling new form, so very beyond that of a simple human, she couldn't help but take in the great mane of white fur around the heavily muscled torso and grinned. Gods, he really was fluffy! A low growl rose from his throat, leaving her wondering if he was aware of what she was thinking. 

"Yeah, yeah, we hear yah," said Inuyasha as he strolled over to the massive carcass, the rest of the group following. "You killed yourself a cat. We got it." 

Sesshomaru took a step back, and then all at once his body dissolved in another brilliant display of bright energy that stirred the air and dirt around him. Booted feet echoed through the cloud of dust as the daiyoukai emerged in his sealed form. "If you were capable of handling the beast on your own, action on my part would not have been required, Inuyasha," he said.

"I had everything under control," his brother spat in return. "You're the one butting in." 

"Then next time I shall permit you a glorious death," replied Sesshomaru, as Rin bounded up to him. His attention was soon turned to the young girl and Jaken joined them a moment later.

Inuyasha snorted. "As if some mangy feline could ever do me in," he muttered, but the youkai lord ignored him, favoring Jaken, instead, with an order to search the area where Ah-Un had fallen.

"I wonder where this thing came from," said Miroku as he examined the fallen feline. 

"Me and Kagome saw it crawl out of the earth," Inuyasha said, jerking a thumb over his shoulder. "Other side of the village. There's this big crack in ground now." 

"That must have been the earthquake," said Sango, who was beside Miroku, the twins milling around them. "But that still doesn't explain what it was doing here or why it was after Lucidity." 

The woman in question came to a halt at the sound of her name, having been walking around and inspecting the carcass like the others. She peered over at the group to see all heads turned in her direction and felt a conscious flush fill her cheeks. "I have no idea," she muttered. 

"You sure? Because it was sure as hell after you, not us," said Inuyasha, arms folded. "You're really saying you don't know what this thing is?"

Lucidity looked down at the beast. It would be simple to state the obvious: a large, dead cat. Yet she did have more of an answer than that, possibly. It didn't make any sense to her. Even if she didn't know, it still made no sense why the lion would be hell bent on killing her. Walking around to the head, she crouched and peered into the mouth that had nearly been the last thing she ever saw in this life. It took a moment for her to spot the sword, deeply embedded where she had left it. After a few hard tugs, during which she had to place a foot against the jaw and pull with both hands, the sword came free. She peered at the blood covered blade, well aware of everyone watching her, then jammed the point into the side of the head, where it pierced cleanly through. 

Inuyasha was the first to dart over and snatch the weapon from her, looking it over. "What the hell?! This is just Sango's sword. Not even Tessaiga could cut this thing." 

Everyone else gathered around, save Sesshomaru, and Lucidity quickly extracted herself from the cluster. 

"Wait!" exclaimed Kagome. "I think I remember something about this. Lucidity, isn't this a monster from mythology? It was crushed to death by a demigod, I thought." 

"Crushed or an arrow to the mouth," said Lucidity. "And it can be skinned with a knife dipped in its blood or by its own claws. Those are the versions I have heard of, at least." 

"I didn't know it was supposed to be so big! But...how did it get here?" Kagome asked. "That story is from another country far from both of ours, isn't it?" 

"Your guess is as good as mine." 

Knowing what the beast was didn't answer any other questions. Kagome, Inuyasha, Miroku, and Sango continued to converse back and forth, speculating either this or that and coming up empty. At one point, Inuyasha broke off a large claw, splintered it into pieces, and tested it on the hide with satisfying results. Apparently there really was more than one way to skin a cat. Jaken returned in the midst of Sango suggesting that they take as much of the hide as possible to make into clothes that would be better than armor. Ah-Un trailed after him, battered and bruised but in one piece. 

Further up a sloping hill from the battlefield, Lucidity leaned against a tree, rotating and working her arm back and forth. An ache was starting to form in her shoulder. She vaguely recalled landing on it after falling from Kirara. This time tomorrow, after the adrenaline wore off completely, she would be feeling everything from today. A small price to pay, she thought, glancing at the open mouth of the lion. 

Sesshomaru approached her. "Are you injured?" 

She shook her head. "Just sore," she said, then paused before adding, "Thanks for saving me, by the way." 

"It would not have been necessary if you were not so reckless a fool," he replied coolly. 

His irritation, for whatever reason, made her smile. "Still angry then?"

"Understand that Tenseiga has its limits," he told her, stepping close enough that she could feel the brush of his mokomoko against her arm. "Your body must be relatively whole in order for you to be brought back; the beast would have ensured a permanent death for you."

The smile withered as she peered up at Sesshomaru, taking in the tension around his mouth and eyes. Minute details, but so blatant to her this close. And it suddenly occurred to her that the daiyoukai whom she'd first left the village with however many weeks ago would not have been angry at any reckless behavior on her part. He would not have lectured her that Tenseiga, powerful as it was, still worked within certain restrictions.

"I'm sorry," she said in a soft voice. "I didn't mean to make you worry."

Golden eyes blinked at her, then the corners of his mouth turned down. "You have been told before not to presume, woman."

A sigh broke from her and she shook her head. No, she really shouldn't try and figure him out. It caused nothing but hours of agonized confusion where she nearly convinced herself about one belief or another, only for doubt to dig its claws in so deeply and firmly that she flung all conclusions out the window. And then the process would repeat itself before she eventually admitted defeat. At least until he did something else that threw another wrench into the mix. That one particular afternoon of a very brief training session was probably the worse. She still flushed with embarrassment, among other things, and felt like the world's biggest moron for allowing it to ever happen.

"Lucidity! Hey, Lucidity!" Kagome was coming towards her and smiling, albeit a bit nervously. Sesshomaru walked away, looking for all the world bored with the entire ordeal, as Kagome came to stand in front of her. The priestess watched him for a moment, before suddenly taking Lucidity's hands in hers and clasping them as if in prayer. "Um...so, I really wanted to thank you for risking your life for everyone. Not just us, but the village, too. If you hadn't led the lion out here like you did, a lot of people would have been hurt and many more homes destroyed and...er...."

"Kagome, not that I don't appreciate what you're saying, but what exactly _are_ you trying to say?" Lucidity asked.

"Well, that, after we're done with the lion and Inuyasha has disposed of it with Tessaiga, there is going to be a lot of work ahead of us to salvage what it wrecked. And...and I'm really sorry to be the one to tell you this, but your home was one of the huts that was destroyed."

"I...what...it.... Ah...Ah, come on! Seriously?!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FLUFFY! 
> 
> That's about all I have to say on this chapter, other than it was really fun to write! And I'm really excited about the next few chapters, too. ^.^


	19. Chapter 19

In no way, shape, or form was Kagome exaggerating. Over the next several days, it was nonstop in the village. From sun up until sun down, every able-bodied person was on his or her feet. Lucidity worked right alongside the rest of the villagers, aches, pains, and bruises ignored in favor of picking up so many pieces. The endless flow of backbreaking labor was refreshing in a way. Being busy meant no time to kick back and relax, no time to sit and ponder over the many worries and uncertainties that made up her existence. And, to be frank, she found it a unique experience, helping a community put itself back together after a disaster.

While she did clear out the debris of her own home and save what she could from the wreckage, she wasn't alone in the effort. The villagers helped her and she helped them. There was wood to be gathered, trees and bamboo to chop down in order to build new homes and storage units. People were working double time in the fields to ensure that enough would be grown and harvested for the winter. And there were also helping families and others who had been wounded or left homeless in the attack.

Lucidity, young, fit, and without any children who demanded her attention, hauled loads of straw, building supplies, water, food, and whatever else that was needed throughout the village; wove mats, baskets, bowls, fishnets; gathered roots and herbs, prepared medicine and meals alike, and overall worked herself to the bone day after day. At night, she dropped like a dead weight onto the borrowed futon inside Kaede's hut, where she initially stayed.

Yet after the first couple of days, she was given quite a shock. That is, she was given her own hut. Not only that, she was no longer shunted to the edge of the community. She was certain, considering the radiant smile on the priestess's face when Lucidity was first shown in, that Kagome had something to do with this change. And Inuyasha did mention that if you risked life and limb for the village, you might as well be part of it. No one protested. None of the children were bothering her. It was nice. Better. As good as it was going to get. And it wasn't so bad. Certainly not what she wanted out of life, but things could always be worse.

Subtly, Lucidity tapped her knuckles on the support post she was leaning against, a bit of "knock on wood" for daring to jinx herself. Sitting on the porch of her new home, she peered around at the people gathered. This was the first time she had "entertained," so to speak. In over a week, the work was slowing down. It was the middle of the afternoon and people were able to take a breather from all the hard labor. Kagome and Inuyasha, Sango and Miroku were congregated outside of Lucidity's hut, filling themselves up with stew and tea. The children were absent, being watched by Rin. There was no Sesshomaru or Jaken either. Both had more or less disappeared with Ah-Un. And by more or less, it meant that they were lingering in the area. Lucidity caught wind of Sesshomaru's aura every so often, probably waiting until an appropriate amount of time had passed before he could demand that Lucidity leave the village again. She couldn't be certain; she hadn't had a chance to go out searching for him to ask.

Maybe she would be able to later today. If not, tomorrow. Right now, the others had deemed it an appropriate time to sit down and visit, with Sango reminding Lucidity that she had promised to regale everyone with her tale of travels. And Lucidity had obliged, with some heavy editing. She would rather none of them know about one thing or another, the killing of two men being just the beginning. She didn't share anything personal, nothing about her thoughts on a certain youkai lord or her feelings about learning from Kaidame that there was no way to get back home. In fact, it was easier to say what she did share rather than what she didn't: being a translator for Sesshomaru, the attack of the vipers, Kaidame and his talk of the Isle of the Four Sisters. Nothing about the entity, the scars on their hands, the training, or even that she had been killed by Sesshomaru's mother, which would have created unnecessary drama and ensuing threats of death, probably some fighting. And it wasn't because she didn't want them to worry. She simply just did not want them to know. Not yet. One day, perhaps, when this was over, when life had settled. Until then, these secrets were hers to keep. 

"I wonder if Myoga knows anything about the Four Sisters," Miroku was saying. "If they're as dangerous as Sesshomaru claims, we'd best gather as much information about them as possible before going to the Isle." 

"What's this 'we' crap?" snapped Inuyasha. "I've said it before: I'm not taking her anywhere." 

"This isn't about Lucidity," Miroku replied. "Though for some reason she is tied to the rising power that Myoga spoke of. Now Kaidame is instructing her to visit this Isle or the power will kill everyone. That includes us. Remember those travelers who came by not too long ago? They talked of strange happenings in other parts of the country, entire crops failing, people and animals becoming sick and going mad, then dying in a matter of days. Youkai your father banished are coming back centuries later in hordes. And now we have this creature attacking our village that has never been seen in this part of the world before. Something is coming. We should be the ones to escort Lucidity to the Isle and find out what's happening, Inuyasha." 

"Damn, Miroku, fine!" said the hanyou. "You've made your point. We'll go." 

"Um...Sesshomaru is the only one who knows the way," Lucidity said. 

Inuyasha jerked forward from where he was lounging against the post across from her. "Are you kidding me?!" 

She shook her head. "He wants to get to the bottom of this, too, so he memorized the map Kaidame gave me and left it behind." 

"Screw that! I'm not going anywhere with that asshole!" 

"Be reasonable," pleaded the monk. "This journey sounds dangerous. He may not admit it, but he could probably use some help." 

"I wouldn't tell him that," said Sango. 

"Yeah, just say that your wives made you for Lucidity's sake," grinned Kagome as she sat down between Inuyasha and Lucidity, having grabbed some more stew from the pot. 

"Don't put this on me!" Lucidity said. "Really, I'm fine going with Sesshomaru alone. I've been able to stand his company this long; I can handle a few more weeks." 

"Yeah, but look at what happened to you," Sango said. "Those vipers nearly killed you just because you were around him. And now you're going into a territory that's more dangerous with enemies we know nothing about. We can't even send Kirara with you this time; she left this morning to find Kohaku." 

Lucidity felt the slightest twinge of guilt. They didn't know how bad it had truly been, but she did not want anyone else tagging along. And if she found Inuyasha and Miroku an inconvenience, it was nothing compared to how Sesshomaru would react. She shook her head and tried a different approach.

"Sango, it's not as if anyone here doesn't have a reputation among youkai. Each of you attract enemies, not just Sesshomaru." Quick glances were exchanged throughout the group and Lucidity quickly pressed on. "He has already agreed to go to the Isle with me. I'm the only one who really needs to go there, not any of you. We don't even know if the Sisters are even a threat to us. They let your father live," she added, addressing Inuyasha directly. "And if they really are so powerful, neither you nor Miroku will make much of a difference if they do turn out to be an enemy. You should stay here and protect the village and your families should anything go wrong."

The uncertainty on their faces was a relief. Even if she hadn't convinced Miroku just yet, Sango, who was looking anxious, would probably finish the job for her. Kagome, staring down at the bowl between her hands, leaned against Inuyasha, who was scratching his head, brows knitted together. He looked around at everyone, at their expressions drawn with worry, then over at Lucidity, who met his gaze and kept her face carefully blank. 

"You make a good point," he said and looked pointedly at Miroku, who wrapped an arm around Sango's shoulders. "I think some of us will need to figure out what to decide. But I just want to know one more thing." He smirked suddenly over the top of Kagome's head at Lucidity. "What the hell did Sesshomaru need a translator for so badly to ask for help?" 

Every pair of eyes snapped onto Lucidity, who realized then that she had been so caught up in trying to keep most of her story vague that she had avoided any and all mention of Sesshomaru's mother. She could easily tell them about the vault and the urn and simply leave out the finer details. She opened her mouth, intending just that, only to stop. "Ah," she murmured. "No. That isn't for me to say. You will have to ask him." 

"If I tried that, he'd sooner punch a hole in my gut than tell me, so save me the trouble, will yah?" Inuyasha said, leaning forward and nudging Kagome in the process.

"That's his business, not mine. I'm not saying a word," Lucidity replied, then frowned at Kagome. "Are you all right?" 

Kagome, suddenly pale and shivering, pressed the back of her hand against her mouth in a gesture Lucidity was rather familiar with. She scooted closer to the priestess and placed a hand to her forehead, while Inuyasha jumped around to kneel in front of her, any other conversations forgotten. 

"You don't look well," Lucidity said. "Do you need some medicine? I might have something. Let me look." She started to rise, but stopped when Kagome took hold of her arm. 

"No, no, I'm fine," she said, offering a smile. 

"If you're going to get sick again, you should lay down," said Inuyasha. 

Kagome gave a soft groan and set aside the stew she had hardly touched. Lucidity glanced down at it, then back at the priestess, whose smile became a bit sheepish when their eyes met. A thought stirred in the back of her mind.

"...again?" Lucidity asked gently. And when Kagome nodded, she pursed her lips together and looked over at Inuyasha, who was scratching his head once more and looking elsewhere, then to Sango and Miroku, who were both beaming, and finally back to Kagome. "Seriously?" 

"I'd been wondering for a while," she said, "but we didn't know for certain until right after you left." 

Lucidity sat back and stared for a long moment, taking in their broad smiles, because Inuyasha was grinning like a devil by this point. Then, much to her own surprise, Lucidity threw her head back and laughed. With so much insanity going on at once-mysterious illnesses, encroaching enemies, ancient legends coming to life-the thought of something so mundane was out of place. But here it was, plain as day, and she found herself pulling Kagome into a hug, the first she had ever initiated. She felt the woman's hesitation, her surprise, and then heard her laugh before returning the embrace. 

Yet when she drew back, Kagome closed her eyes and covered her mouth again. Inuyasha was there, easing his wife to her feet and whispering to her that she needed to rest. Kagome did not protest in the least, but nodded and leaned against him, before smiling at Lucidity once again. "I'm sorry we have to leave like this. Thank you for the meal." 

"Yeah, thanks," added Inuyasha, already leading Kagome down the path to their home. 

"We should be going, too," Miroku said as he and Sango stood. "Rin's been with the children for most of the day." 

"We should start training again tomorrow," said Sango. "Where's your staff?" 

"Er...Sesshomaru broke it," Lucidity admitted. "Same day we left." 

"What? Why?" asked Miroku. 

"He didn't like me hitting Jaken with it for some reason." 

The two of them laughed. 

"I can't imagine why," Miroku chuckled. 

"We can make more," said Sango. "Some hand-to-hand then and the bokken. The balance beam is still set up. First thing in the morning, got it?" 

Lucidity nodded, grinning, but was soon waving farewell to the last of her guests. She peered around at the clutter left behind, then went to work clearing it up. Any stew that hadn't been finished was dumped back into the pot and the fire banked to keep it warm throughout the day. She then went about gathering the bowls and cups and washed them with the small tub of water that was kept nearby. Inside the hut, she stowed the dishes away and looked around. The pot of tea was empty and the herbs that had been steeped were drying in preparation for a second use. Her futon was rolled up. The floors had been cleared and swept. Stacked in a corner were about five journals that had manage to survive the destruction of their previous home, though not entirely unscathed. Many pages had fallen out, never to be seen again. One journal was torn completely in half. And the rotary device for making the paper had to be rebuilt. The tablet was gone, smashed to pieces and none of the pottery had survived either. The dishes and cooking pot had been gifted by the village, excess materials that others did not need. Overall, the hut was sparse and didn't quite feel like it was hers, not yet. Maybe if she burned some incense. Sage and sweet grass. When she had a chance, she would ask Kaede. This was to be her home now. It might as well be as she wanted it.

But would it always be like this? Less than an hour ago it had been lively here, so full of talk, even laughter, with news that lifted the heart after so serious a discussion that troubled the mind. Yet every night it was quiet inside the hut. Before, she'd been able to abide the solitude by nursing the belief that everything here was a temporary arrangement. But now that she was back, she was coming to understand that she had really been a fool to carry such a belief for so long. It could and would truly be like this, day after day after day.

Suddenly, the thought of staying inside a moment longer brought about a threatening surge of panic. She was on her feet and out the door, sliding it shut behind her, before she realized what she was doing, and began walking through the village without any idea as to where she was going. At first she found herself heading down the path that led to the outskirts of where the old hut had been. But she had seen enough of the damage and broken earth to last a lifetime and veered off in another direction. The people she passed gave the usual courtesy of greetings, which she acknowledged without ever really seeing who it was. It was a relief when she was out of the village and reached the forest. Without thought or hesitation, she broke into a run, knowing she needed to work off the sharpened edge of this mood.

Though not as familiar with this part of the woods, she tore through the trees, dodging around their trunks, leaping over roots, and ducking low hanging branches. She twisted and turned, letting her reflexes take hold and drive her along. She listened to the sound of her heavy breathing, felt her heart rate increasing, the hard ground beneath her feet, and the sweet ache in her muscles as she pushed herself further, until she finally came to a stop. Panting, hands on her knees, she reached up and rubbed at a stitch in her side before looking around. She straightened and, still trying to catch her breath, began making her way through the forest at a much slower pace. The run had done the trick. She was calmer, but her mind was spinning with thoughts without the exertion of exercise to distract her.

She stopped suddenly when she came across a sight she hadn't seen in months. Standing apart from the other trees, the old wound of the trunk made it unmistakable. She stared down at the gnarled roots of Goshinboku, then up to its branches. Even without having to approach it, she could sense that it was different. It was what gave the forest such a unique quality. Not eerie, but different. As she stepped onto the roots, she laid a hand on the rough bark and felt the answering hum of whatever power lay inside. How old was this tree anyway? She knew the story of Inuyasha and Kikyo, of how Inuyasha was pinned with a sacred arrow for fifty years. But before that happened, the tree was already revered, had been standing for ages. What gave it such power? She touched the scar of the trunk. The hum was stronger here, more like a steady heartbeat. She drew her hand away and stepped back, gazing up at the first thing she had ever laid eyes on in this era. There were no answers here.

She should get back to the village. There was still work to do and it kept her mind off these unpleasant things. And yet the idea of returning made her stomach twist so heavily that she felt sick. At a loss, she lowered herself onto one of the roots and leaned against the trunk, legs drawn up and arms folded across her stomach, as she peered up at the canopy of leaves.

She hated this. She didn't know what to do. She didn't like living in a fantasy world where she told herself something would make everything better, that this really would be a temporary situation, a horrible nightmare to look back on. If she spent too much energy on that, she would never be able to live in reality. And yet to accept, to well and truly admit that this would forever be her home was, in a way, more frightening than being held captive by vipers.

A ripple in the air jarred Lucidity from her thoughts. She turned her head and saw the figure emerging from the trees, accompanied by neither imp nor dragon. Well aware that he had been in the area, but a little surprised he had been so close without her realizing, she went back to staring up at the branches, watching the wind sway through the limbs, and listened to the soft footsteps as Sesshomaru approached. Had he seen her leaving the village in her little flight of panic? She was almost curious enough to ask, but found she didn't much care about the answer. He was here, so that meant he was done waiting around. And the idea of leaving with him was suddenly far more appealing than any other option.

She looked over when the sound of footsteps ceased. Sesshomaru was there, standing in front of Goshinboku, studying it much as she had done, before he lighted upon the roots and touched the trunk with claw-tipped fingers, again just like her, minus the claws. She watched as he began to trace the scar. "What are you doing?" she asked.

"I should think it obvious," he replied. "This tree has a connection between past and present; I am curious about it."

Well, at least he explained himself, she thought as she looked away. That was an improvement, right? She sighed, staring at the top of her knees. Should she tell him that the tree was a dead end? Maybe she should just ask when they would be taking off. In a couple days, perhaps? Tomorrow? Right now? There was no way she would be able to scrounge up everything she needed for another journey at the last minute, but just the thought of getting out of the village made her want to try. The sooner they set out for the Isle, the better. And once they reached the Isle, then....

Then what? She had an explanation as to why she was brought here, maybe what had brought her here. And maybe there really would be a solution to the rising power, a way to defeat it, but after all that, what would happen? She would come right back to the village, to the little hovel she'd been given, and observe the lives of her friends moving right along. Inuyasha and Kagome would start the next chapter of their lives soon. And Lucidity was happy for them, she really had been, still was. Yet the news that lifted the heart also served as a reminder of what she believed would never be possible for her in this era. She was too old, too strange, and did not believe she could ever fully accept this place, could ever really belong. There were some secrets she just couldn't share, some things she just couldn't accept.

The necklace was between her fingers and resting against her lips before she became conscious of what she was doing. And even then, she didn't bother tucking the silver away. The despondency that had settled over her was a weight unto itself. Her body was heavy, her mind sluggish, and she just didn't have it in her to care about much, not the Isle or the Sisters, not about finding answers, or to so much as move from this spot. The thought of budging a muscle, of moving forward in any way, made her all the more inclined to stay right here. What was the point of finding answers if it changed nothing?

Something constricted in her throat and her fingers tightened on the pendant, squeezing until it hurt. She hadn't been aware of the burning in her eyes until it was too late. The wetness stung as she blinked and had to swallow around the lump in her throat. And yet no effort on her part could prevent the few stray tears that escaped, which she wiped hurriedly away, very much conscious of the daiyoukai beside her. She always wondered when she would reach her breaking point, but the thought of falling apart in current company-or any company for that matter-was as mortifying to her as that disastrous sparring session.

The sound of movement beside her had Lucidity clenching her teeth and closing her eyes. She turned her head, hoping her hair would provide some sort of cover. But when she heard Sesshomaru step onto the ground to stand beside her, she nearly cracked, so very close to burying her face and succumbing to tears, as though having a witness shattered the last remnants of control. She took a deep breath, trying so desperately to calm down, when she felt something against her hair, pulling it aside. Her entire body stiffened and her eyes snapped open, catching sight of the white sleeve of a haori.

Sesshomaru had moved her hair out of the way. And even as she stared unblinking at a spot on the ground, his fingers tucked the locks behind her ear, revealing her face and the heated color she knew was there, along with the tear tracks she had tried so pitifully to hide. She swallowed, feeling the old and too familiar humming race of her heart, only for it to seize in her chest the moment the back of his hand eased against her cheek. With this one gesture, he had effectively frozen her in place. And yet she had never felt so flushed and warmed as she did now, simply feeling his caress along her skin.

Anything and everything was driven from her mind at the mere touch. She felt his claws for the briefest moment before his palm pressed against her cheek, moving down and cupping her chin. He lifted her head, turning her face up, and she let him. Her mouth was dry and her heart was in her throat. She couldn't think. She should ask something, say something, but nothing was coming to mind. But...actions spoke louder than words, did they not?

Swallowing, she reached up and, after a split second of hesitation, covered his hand with hers. His expression, stoic and controlled as it was, could not completely hide the flicker in his gaze, how his eyes sharpened with focus or the way his mouth moved in an almost thoughtful gesture. Then his lips parted and he sighed, a soft ghosting of breath, as his eyes closed for the briefest moment. And without warning, he pulled back. His hand slipped from hers as he straightened and turned to peer behind him just as a red and silver form sprang out of the trees and sprinted to a stop in front of them.

"Inuyasha," Sesshomaru said, his voice cold. It was not a greeting. It was an unspoken command for his brother to explain himself.

Inuyasha snorted and folded his arms inside his sleeves. "I'd tell you to go piss off somewhere, but I thought you'd like to know about some humans who showed up. They're from a neighboring village that was attacked a couple days ago."

"How is this a concern of mine?"

"From what it sounds like, it was a bunch of youkai from the Viper Clan. You wouldn't know anything about those guys, would you?"

Sesshomaru's gaze was accusing when he glanced at Lucidity, who was trying to figure out how to get her brain to working again.

"In my defense, you didn't tell me not to say anything," she eventually muttered as she rose to her feet.

"Doesn't matter," Inuyasha cut in. "I was going to let you deal with the bastards on your own, Sesshomaru, but if they're this close, I ain't sitting around and waiting for them to attack. Me and Miroku are heading out. If you want a shot at these guys, I suggest you hurry. We just might leave you a few."

"You have no business with the Viper Clan, Inuyasha," the daiyoukai replied. "You will leave them to me."

"What about their barrier?" Lucidity asked, only to realize a second too late her mistake. The glare Sesshomaru shot her left no room to doubt that she really had messed up this time in saying something she shouldn't have.

"Hah!" Inuyasha jeered. "A barrier will be no problem for Red Tessaiga. Just leave it to me; I'll wipe out those filthy snakes."

"And how do you plan to accomplish such a feat if you cannot locate them?" Sesshomaru demanded.

"As if they can hide from me," was the cocky reply. "So you better get a move on if you want the leftovers." Inuyasha gave a feral grin, then turned to Lucidity. "Sango's got something for you back at her place, by the way. She wanted me to find you before I took off and...what are you doing out here anyway?"

Resisting the urge to look at Sesshomaru, she shrugged as nonchalant as possible. "Was taking a walk," she said, which was more or less true.

"Yeah, whatever. Just don't stay out after dark; it's not safe," Inuyasha replied, and then bounded away. Apparently, in his book, that passed for a farewell.

Lucidity stared after him for a moment, then let out a sigh and looked over at Sesshomaru, whose gaze was pensive and distant. "Sorry," she said and those golden eyes slid over to her. "About mentioning the barrier."

His mouth creased at the corners. "The Red Tessaiga will be necessary in this case."

"But Inuyasha doesn't know where-"

"I do," Sesshomaru said.

"Oh," she murmured. "You're going to have to work with him, aren't you?"

"So it would appear."

The displeasure in his voice brought a soft smile of sympathy to her lips, but she was surprised when Sesshomaru abruptly turned and began walking in a direction that led away from the village. "Are you leaving now?"

He stopped and peered back at her. "There is no choice in the matter. If the Viper Clan is nearby, you are in danger. Or have you forgotten their interest in you?"

"I...no," she said, silently reeling with the rush of comprehension that Sesshomaru intended to endure Inuyasha's aid and bad attitude for her sake. He would have hunted the vipers on his own otherwise, she was sure of it.

"Then you will understand that you are to remain within the safety of the village until I return," he told her.

She frowned, caught somewhere between her irritation at being given an order and bearing witness to the daiyoukai's version of concern. "I suppose," she eventually replied. "If it gives you peace of mind."

"Impudent woman," Sesshomaru said, turning away in a gentle whirl of fur and silk. "Do what you will."

She let out a sigh at the memory those words invoked. "I guess I'll wait in the village," she said, despite how it cost her some measure of pride. For his sake, though, she could make that promise.

"Until I return," he replied without so much as a glance back.

Standing beneath the shade of Goshinboku, she watched Sesshomaru's form disappear into the forest and remained there long after she lost sight of him, before shifting her gaze onto the sacred tree. The burn of his touch was still warm on her face and she couldn't help but feel as if the end of a circle had been reached. And yet, peering down at the seven-pointed star branded on her palm, she knew that could not be possible; there were still too many questions that needed to be answered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! Angsty plot points! Sorry if this dragged for anyone. An evil necessity to keep the story moving.


	20. Chapter 20

A coat.

That was what Sango had for Lucidity. It was a bit of a surprise. Lucidity had been expecting a weapon of some type, having returned the daemon slayer's sword, but was presented, instead, with a coat that stretched nearly to the ground. Long sleeves, which threatened to cover her hands when she tried it on, were not large and open as was typical for this era, and it was revealed that Kagome had been the one to choose the style based on Lucidity's modern preferences. Wooden toggles held the coat shut, all the way up to the throat and a hood of dark brown fur allowed for extra protection. Not only from inclement weather, but from every possible weapon imaginable, considering that this coat was one of the first pieces of clothing to be created from the lion hide.

Lucidity was shocked when she learned that Sango had been working on it for days once she had the material ready, using sewing needles and shears made from the claws. She knew here was an entire process of prepping the hide and making it into the leather that was soft and pliable and, honestly, could not imagine the amount of time and effort it had taken to make this one bit of clothing.

"You're going to need something better than youkai silk for where you're going," Sango said as she tugged the front of the coat closed and slid the last wooden toggle into place at the base of Lucidity's throat. "Turn around. See how it feels and try to move; make sure you aren't restricted."

Outside of Sango's home, Lucidity did as she was bid, lifting her arms, shifting her legs, in all sense mimicking a fight with an invisible opponent, at first with a sword, then a staff, and smiled at the easy flow of movement. From the waist down, there were no toggles and the coat opened up, allowing her legs a free range of motion. She spun back to face Sango and ran her hands along the soft, tan colored fur of the beast that had tried so hard to kill her.

"It's perfect," she said. "But you realize I have to get you back for this."

"Get me back? What do you mean?"

Lucidity grinned. "Get even with you. You've done so much for me; I'll never be able to make it up to you, but I want to try, somehow."

Sango laughed. "If you insist. With Miroku gone, I'll need help with the children. Rin can only do so much and Kaede has been needing her help while the village is being restored. There's still so much to do and the harvest will be starting soon."

Lucidity folded her arms. "That's not enough, but it's a start. I'm at your disposal from now until the end," she said and even gave an exaggerated bow. 

"Until the end? Really?" Sango asked with a grin. "Even after Miroku gets back?"

"I don't see why not. I could even take the children overnight if you want to spend some time alone with him."

Sango beamed and dragged Lucidity into one of her bone crushing hugs.

* * *

As predicted, the work did not slow down. A week after the men, along with Jaken and Ah-Un, had gone to fight the good fight, the village was more or less recovered in appearance. There was still worry about the loss of food and many prayers were held while the fields were tended to. Nothing was allowed to go to waste, not even the smallest of grains. Extra game was hunted and the meat dried and preserved. Lucidity would have liked to join, simply because she had never hunted, or at least learned how to set snared. Yet, because of that blasted promise to Sesshomaru, she remained within the boundaries of the village, foraging for plants. Kagome was often in need of medicine these days and had difficulty making her rounds in the morning, sometimes in the afternoon, as well. Inadvertently, this caused Kaede to turn to Lucidity for help and the woman found herself learning more about plant life and herbal remedies than she ever thought possible. As time went by, more and more of the villagers were coming to Lucidity for assistance with sore throats, fevers, injuries, and so on, especially when it became common knowledge that she was helping their expecting priestess.

One week soon became two, then three, and eventually four. The harvest season had arrived. The storage huts were being filled little by little, day by day. The mood of the people was becoming optimistic. There were whispers that the food supply would be more than adequate to last through the winter. The air of the village was one of relief and a hint of celebration. A true festival would be not be held for another month or so, but it would be a well deserved one by all accounts.

Lucidity kept track of everything and more in her journal, which she'd been able to recover along with the pack. She wrote down the details of daily activities each night by light of the fire, and counted the days by cycles of the moon. The day Sesshomaru had left, there had been a waxing crescent in the sky that night. The full moon had come and gone and only a sliver of it could be seen the day before when Sango came to her this evening, children in tow, and was bristling with excitement. Miroku had returned with Inuyasha not too long ago and she was holding Lucidity to her promise to watch the children.

The news startled Lucidity, who agreed at once, but was left a bit dazed after Sango departed. Only Miroku and Inuyasha? Where was Sesshomaru? Though she would have sensed him if he was in the area, she nonetheless attempted to take a quick feel of the air while the twins began to inspect her hut and the baby entertained himself playing with her hair while she held him. Nothing, she came to realize. She couldn't sense anything, not even Inuyasha. Sango had said he was back, too, right? Had he left somewhere with Kagome? That must be the case, but it didn't answer any of her questions. Why were they back and not Sesshomaru? If something had happened, Sango would have told her, she was sure. So, where the hell was he?

Never before had a night with children been so agonizing. Lucidity knew she couldn't barge over to Kagome's home and demand answers, and she wasn't going to interrupt Sango. She managed to get the twins to bed without much difficulty, while the baby fussed for only a short while before falling asleep, leaving her in silence to contemplate and wonder, tossing and turning for hours until it finally occurred to her how stupid she was being, acting like some idiotic, pining schoolgirl. The dawning comprehension had her burying her face into the futon, wondering if it was possible to smother herself.

It was a long while before she could get to sleep and, come morning, she was exhausted. The children were up. The baby was crying. She managed to get them fed, the baby changed after a much needed washing, and brought the brood back to their mother a few hours after dawn. She was surprised to find Kagome there and the two women sitting together outside, talking quietly and looking forlorn. The twins ran into Sango's welcoming embrace while Lucidity made her way a bit more slowly with the infant in her arms.

"What's wrong?" she asked upon handing Sango her son.

"It's nothing," Sango said. "Thank you for looking after them."

"We just wish that Miroku and Inuyasha could have stayed longer," Kagome explained.

Lucidity stared. "You mean they left already? Why? And why come back at all?"

"It was a new moon last night," said Kagome. "Inuyasha doesn't like being away from the village during that time."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

Sango and Kagome glanced at each other, surprise written across their faces, while the twins began to run around and dive on the grass, in a game of youkai and prey.

"You don't know?" asked Sango, shifting the infant between her arms.

"I thought for sure I told you," muttered Kagome.

"Told me what?"

"Once a month, the youkai blood of a hanyou becomes dormant," Sango began. "He becomes vulnerable, human."

"And for Inuyasha, that happens on the night of the new moon," Kagome said.

"You're kidding?" Lucidity lowered herself onto the porch beside her friends. This explained the reason she couldn't sense Inuyasha last night, if his aura was nothing more than that of another human, and had caught only a glimpse of it this morning if he took off so quickly. "How come no one told me?"

"Ah...you know, Inuyasha didn't want me to," Kagome said with a nervous chuckle. "Oh well, he'll get over it."

"Is that why Sesshomaru wasn't with them? Does he not know either?" Lucidity asked.

"I'm not sure actually," said Sango.

"I don't think he does," said Kagome. "But Inuyasha told me that Sesshomaru didn't want to come back until after they've dealt with every last member of the Viper Clan. Those barriers of theirs are powerful. They found the one that was hiding most of the Clan, but there are several more scattered around. Miroku has been tracking the barriers and Inuyasha breaks them with the Red Tessaiga."

"And I'm guessing Sesshomaru takes care of the rest?" Lucidity added.

"From what it sounds like," Sango muttered with a frown. "Miroku says that there is no getting in his way. He's completely without mercy. Anyone who has tried to fight him has ended up dead and he's none too kind with the ones who simply try to flee either."

"But they've been attacking villages and killing people," said Kagome. "Did you know they like to feed on human blood?"

"I'm well aware," answered Lucidity, rubbing her neck. "Did either Inuyasha or Miroku have any idea how many more vipers there are?"

Both Kagome and Sango shook their heads. Lucidity let out a sigh. Who knew how much longer it would be, then? If the stragglers were scattered and had to be hunted down one by one, it could easily take another month, perhaps more. There was no way to say for certain. She hated the waiting, the not knowing. Absently, she brushed the tips of her fingers over her cheek. Despite how the memory had dimmed, she could not stop thinking about it, about Sesshomaru and his touch, what it could mean and.... Gods, she was being ridiculous! She didn't get like this! She didn't long for or yearn or any of that crap. It made her want to hit something, hard!

"Lucidity, um, are you okay?" asked Kagome.

Suddenly aware that she was still touching her cheek, Lucidity quickly dropped her hand and looked over at Sango and Kagome, who were watching her with puzzled, albeit concerned frowns. She forced a smile. "Just thinking," she said. "I'm worried about everything, you know? But I'm glad the men are safe."

"Yeah, me too," Sango sighed. "I was ready to kill Miroku for being gone so long, if he wasn't already...." She shook her head and managed a smile that Lucidity believed was as forced as hers had been.

"Honestly, I was worried about Inuyasha and Sesshomaru killing each other," said Lucidity. "But it's been a month, so maybe they'll survive another few weeks together."

"Probably with Miroku there to diffuse them," Kagome added.

Lucidity couldn't help but laugh at the image of the poor monk playing mediator between the brothers, swords drawn, energies rising, and the two women soon joined her, easing the tension and helping them relax. Soon, Sango was smiling and there was nothing strained in the expression. 

"Kagome, I think maybe we should show her what we have," the daemon slayer said suddenly.

"What? Really?" replied Kagome. "I thought we were going to wait until she was ready to leave for the Isle."

"Yes, but the boys could come back at any time. And if it doesn't fit, we'll have to make adjustments, though I'm certain the measurements are right."

"Wait, wait," said Lucidity. "No! You aren't gifting me with anything else. Sango!" Too late. The baby had been shoved into her arms with a firm order to stay put while Sango and Kagome hurried into the hut. There was much shuffling around, a few muttered words. Lucidity got to her feet, glancing at the twins, who were picking at some flowers and pulling the petals off, but soon looked back as the women came out, Kagome carrying a pair of boots and Sango a set of clothes, all newly made.

"No!" Lucidity repeated. "You're always doing too much for me. I can't!"

"You can and you will," said the daemon slayer, in a tone of finality that not even Miroku dared to cross. "Now give me the baby and put these on or no training for a week."

"Gees, you trying to sound like everyone's mother?" Lucidity muttered, but handed the baby over and took the clothes before disappearing into the hut to change.

The youkai silk was peeled off, boots and all. And as fond as she was of the tunic and leggings, she was interested to try something new; it wasn't as if there were stores here she could just walk into and purchase a bunch of outfits. This one was just as surprising as the coat, with a definite modern twist. The clothing had been dyed. The boots and new leggings were a deep chocolate brown, almost black. And the shirt was a rich red, not vibrant, but more of a copper tone found in the leaves in autumn. Lucidity did not know the finer details of dying in this era, but was aware enough of all the time and effort this must have taken. Damn these women! She'd never be able to pay them back, never be able to truly find a way to thank them. And.... Jaken was going to burst a blood vessel when he saw her in this.

Kagome and Sango made noises of excitement when Lucidity stepped out. Lucidity heard remarks about finding the right minerals for the dye job, that it had been Kagome's idea, that the material was, again, made from the lion and that the clothes were as much for Lucidity's protection as it was for their peace of mind. Supple, just like the coat. Comfortable and easy to move around in. Yet Lucidity couldn't help but notice how the clothes fit like a second skin. The boots clung to her calves. The leggings were tight over her thighs and the shirt was tight over...other parts of the body, crisscrossing in front and exposing the hollow of her throat in the short V shape it created; the necklace, at least, could be hidden. But she shamelessly felt as if she was on display, which was a small mark of how much time she had spent in this era. Before, she would not have so much as batted an eye at such an outfit.

"Do you not like it?" Kagome asked anxiously as Lucidity ran an uncertain hand down the long sleeve of the shirt that ended at the wrist.

"Actually, I think I kinda love it," she admitted, looking over to see both women beaming at her. "It will take some getting used to, but it definitely reminds me of home."

Kagome clapped. "That's what I was hoping for. And, you know what, you kinda look like a hunter in those clothes."

Lucidity frowned. "A hunter?"

"No," said Sango with a grin. "She looks like a slayer of youkai."

"I'm no slayer," Lucidity said with a shake of her head.

"You will be by the time I'm done training you," replied Sango.

"I think we should do something about her hair, though," said Kagome. "Otherwise it will get in the-Lucidity, no! Stay here!"

Lucidity's bid for freedom ended in miserable failure, during which she was subjected to a long bout of preening from Kagome while Sango wrangled in her children and went to find Rin. By the time Sango returned, minus her brood, Lucidity had a fresh braid plaited over a shoulder, thankfully without any strings of silver, which were somewhere at the bottom of her pack still. Sango smiled at her and she grimaced in return.

"All right," said the daemon slayer. "Time to test your new clothing out. Go grab the coat, too. I want to see if there's any difference between two layers or one."

"So, basically you're going to stick me until I bleed?" Lucidity muttered while Kagome giggled.

"That's the idea, so get moving," Sango ordered. "I need to look for my knives."

While not thrilled at the idea of being a human pincushion, Lucidity stood, as did Kagome, who mentioned doing her rounds with Kaede since she wasn't feeling ill for once, and the two women went their separate ways. Lucidity drew more stares than usual as she walked through the village and could only hope that the people became accustomed to this outfit as they had done with the last one, which was currently tucked under an arm, boots in hand. She hurried back to her hut, where she deposited the old clothes and snatched the coat off the rolled up futon.

Yet just as she pulled it on and drew the hood free, she stopped. At first she couldn't be certain. But as she stepped out of the hut and started down the path, she knew that something was on the air. It was faint, nothing more than a breeze that did not exist. A low level youkai, perhaps? It was coming this way. She drew the coat closed and fed a couple toggles through their loops as she approached Sango's home and saw the daemon slayer standing outside, some items in hand.

"Is Shippo due back from his training yet?" Lucidity asked.

"No," said Sango, reaching out to undo the toggles. Lucidity was about to question the sudden need to strip her when Sango slipped a belt around her waist and buckled it into place. "He won't be back until winter. Why?"

"Something is coming," she answered. "Maybe we should take a look."

Sango looked up and nodded. "Here." She handed Lucidity a dagger in its sheathe and grabbed her wakizashi. "There's actually a hidden fold in the back of your shirt you can put that in. For small weapons only. But once we get you a sword of your own, you can put it on the belt."

Lucidity, deciding not to comment on being gifted with yet another item, felt around as she and Sango made their way through the village. Sure enough, she found the pocket near the small of her back, covered by a tight crease in the material that she was able to slip the dagger inside of. The weight of the weapon rested comfortably in place as they crested a small hill and saw, in the near distance, a cluster of men on horseback being greeted by several of the villagers, including Kaede and Headman Haru. Kagome was there and broke away when Sango and Lucidity approached.

"What's going on?" Sango asked.

"I'm not sure," said Kagome. "They were just telling Haru that they've been hearing stories about our village."

"They're samurai," Sango whispered.

Lucidity, having spotted the long and short swords each of the men carried, swallowed and resisted the near overwhelming impulse to turn tail and run. Her heart thudded in her ears as the man in front, his face more heavily lined than the others and distinctly unfriendly, met her gaze. It wasn't a daemon she'd been sensing at all, she realized as he addressed the headman.

"So the rumors are true; you have been harboring a gaijin." The man's voice was oiled, arrogant, and his words were clipped and angry.

"Harboring? No sir, we would not," said Haru. "We have kept her secret from no one. She has been with us for nearly a year and-"

"A year, you say?" the man interrupted. "No matter. By order of the shogun, all gaijin are to be surrendered to us. We must rid our lands of the evils they have brought."

"Surrendered?" Kaede repeated. "You don't mean-"

The samurai raised his voice. "Take her!"

The other men dismounted and began to break through the crowd who had gathered. Kagome and Sango pressed in on either side of Lucidity, who heard the sound of a sword starting to leave its scabbard. She grabbed Sango's wrist.

"No," she whispered. "They'll kill everyone."

"We can't just let them!" Sango hissed.

"You can and you will," Lucidity said, fixing the daemon slayer a hard glare that rooted her in place. "You will not do a damn thing, Sango, understood?"

Sango, her mouth open, never had a chance to reply as the men swarmed between them. Hands seized Lucidity in bruising grips and began to drag her, though she did not resist.

"No!" Kagome shouted. "You can't! Please! She's done nothing-AH!" Kagome landed hard when one of the men shoved her to the dirt, sword raised high. Lucidity saw Sango dart forward in an attempt to shield the priestess.

"DON'T!" she heard Sango cry out. "She's pregnant! Don't!"

The sword never came down. The man who held it peered over at the leader, who spat an order to leave the stupid women alone. Sango and Kagome remained on the ground, Kaede crouched over them. Lucidity caught their eye and managed a grim smile, trying to mutely reassure them that everything would be fine, but it did nothing to lessen the terror that surged through her. Kagome dissolved into tears, burying her face into her hands, while Sango held her, her own eyes a bit too moist. It was the last clear image of her friends that Lucidity had before she was force to turn around and face the samurai leader. She peered up, meeting his dark gaze, and a sneer twisted his mouth.

The scar on her hand burned red hot as she was brought forward.

* * *

A day and a night.

That was how much time had passed since Jaken and Ah-Un had been left behind. A full day and night since he had ceased his pursuit of the few remaining vipers who had not been intelligent enough to escape back into their territory. He could still hear the imp's voice calling out, asking where his master was going, the reason for his decision to suddenly abandon what they had been striving to achieve for the last several weeks. Sesshomaru did not explain himself, was accountable to no one, even if there was a moment to spare to do so. And there was not, which only led to the mounting frustration that it had taken a day and a night to reach the village. The effort spent to reach his destination was not without its consequences. A rare sense of exhaustion encroached upon the corners of his mind. Yet he had not stopped, not since he'd felt the searing pain on his palm, a warning that he had come to understand, even if the origin of the brander continued to elude him.

Gasps and cries from the villagers echoed below as his form sped overhead, a spherical light that rattled the roofs of their dwellings and sent the cowards at heart running for their lives, which were not even worth the taking of. Sesshomaru descended as a particular hut came into view, one set in the midst of the community that he had seen her occupy from a distance, the one she had fled from the day he'd found her at the base of Goshinboku. Nothing but four walls, she'd called it.

He landed before the doorway and slid it open with a sharp snap. Empty, but he had expected no less. Regardless of what his other senses told him, it was a matter he'd needed to confirm with sight alone. He peered around, his gaze lingering here and there. A fire had long since gone out beneath a cooking pot, naught but ash below and food spoiling above. There was no fresh scent of tea or clean smell of soap. The air was saturated with her scent, but even with the clothes and futon covered in the familiar aroma, he knew she had not been here in over a day.

"Sesshomaru! Sesshomaru!"

The daiyoukai moved away from the hut and turned to the women sprinting towards him. The distress upon their faces did nothing to lessen his trepidation. The fingers of his hand flexed, his palm still aching.

"Where is she?" he demanded as the priestess and daemon slayer stopped before him, panting with exertion.

"Gone," gasped Kagome. "But how did-" a heavy breath, "-how did you kn-know?"

"She was told not to leave the village," he said, ignoring the question. "What happened?"

The women looked at one another and, much to his irritation, the priestess burst into a fit of sobbing. His teeth clenched as the other attempted to console the hysterical woman. Resisting the urge to growl, he moved closer.

"Answer me," he ordered. "Does she live?"

"We don't know," Sango murmured, face pale, as she held Kagome. "The shogun is having his samurai round up every gaijin; he believes they have brought the rising power to the country. We don't know what he intends to do with her."

"Fool!" Sesshomaru snarled, agitation seizing his tongue in spite of his efforts, and the two women flinched, expressions filling with shock. He leveled them with a cold glare. "You will tell me their direction of travel."

"East," Sango answered at once.

"Please find her, Sesshomaru," Kagome said. "They took her yesterday morning; they can't have gone far."

It did not matter, he thought as his form coalesced and rose into the air. No amount of distance would save the dead men walking if they had harmed what was under his protection.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woohoo! Change of wardrobe! 
> 
> Oh, and look. Sesshy-kun is back. ^.^ Been a few chapters since we've seen inside his head. Wonder what's going on in there. 
> 
> Also, I'm grieved to say that the next chapter might be a bit longer in being posted. I will be out of town for the next few days and won't have much opportunity to write. In the meantime: Stay Calm and Team Fluffy!


	21. Chapter 21

The last of the condemned had been executed moments ago and the head was being set upon a pike when Sesshomaru arrived at the village of the shogun. A dozen bodies were piled in carts beside the execution block. The final corpse was dropped in and the loads hauled off, while a man proclaimed to the crowd that the influence of outsiders would be tolerated no longer, that their very presence was an affront, their tongues spread lies, and those found sheltering a gaijin would be put to death. None of this held any interest for the daiyoukai, who scanned the pikes with a hard frown and saw no crown of yellow among them. Blood hung thick in the air and the accumulated stench of so many humans clustered together momentarily overpowered the trail he had followed to the village. He remained out of sight on the outskirts, undetected by the villagers who were well engrossed in the spectacles of death, and sifted through the numerous smells until he picked up the trail once more. 

Lucidity's scent was fresh, as was the corpse he discovered in the forest, relatively warm to the touch. A young male with his throat slit and a pungent odor of elevated pheromones clinging to the dead flesh painted a curious picture. The implication of it did nothing to improve Sesshomaru's darkened mood. Yet the more pressing concern was the other smells in the area, the indication of several men traveling on horseback in the same direction Lucidity had fled in. The earth was torn up by the hooves of at least four of the beasts, less than an hour old. And judging by how long the corpse had been left to rot under the sun, Lucidity had a decent advantage of time on the men who were hunting her down. Yet, with her on foot, that would change quickly. 

Sesshomaru took in this information in a matter of seconds before he set off again. Deeper into the woods, covering ground faster than any animal upon four legs, the spherical energy cut a sharp path through the thickening trees until he came upon the horses that had been left behind, unable to bear their riders further. The horses scattered as he shot past. The forest was becoming denser. The waning sunlight of the day broke here and there through the heavy foliage. Trees grew so close together that the roots overlapped, became entangled, and Sesshomaru started to rise above canopy, listening, scenting the air, until the aroma of fresh blood reached his nose. Her blood.

A renewed burst of speed brought him upon the scene. Three men stood in a small clearing, while a fourth lay face down in a pool of blood. And Lucidity was struggling between two who each held an arm, hair disheveled, bleeding from the corner of her mouth, as a third, his back to Sesshomaru, drove a blade into her stomach.

Her cry was drowned out by the agonized scream of the dying man as claws tore through his spine. Lucidity dropped to the ground, arms around her stomach, when the other men released her and unsheathed their weapons. Sesshomaru gave no thought of drawing Bakusaiga or summoning the Whip, but closed his hand over the throat of the one who charged him first. In a single motion, he snapped the man's neck and flung him aside, then reached for the last, who met a similar fate. 

Before the body even touched the ground, Sesshomaru was down on one knee in front of the woman, easing her upright by the shoulders as she coughed and drew in sharp gasps of air. His hand ran over her stomach, brushing the wooden clasps that held the clothing shut, but he could see no damage, not even a tear in the fabric. How was this possible? The attire was new, he had noted, and on closer inspection, he recognized the tan fur it was made of.

As the answer became clear, he peered up at her face, drained of color, eyes bright with fear that was slowly beginning to recede. A flicker of comprehension, then relief filled her gaze and, in an abrupt movement that threatened to knock even a daiyoukai off balance, she flung herself forward and wrapped her arms tight around his neck. Still holding her by one shoulder, he turned his head slightly, seeing nothing but the mane of yellow hair that he'd searched for upon a pike. The labored breathing in his ear and the trembling frame against his seemed to reiterate over and over that she was here and she was safe. After what he had witnessed back at the village, the hours spent trying to locate her, part of him had doubted this outcome. How had she managed to break free when others had not?

It did not matter, he found himself thinking, as her forehead came to rest on his shoulder, her grip starting to loosen. She was alive and, with that knowledge, he allowed himself a breath of respite and his perfect composure cracked as his arms slid around her, a hand weaving itself into her hair. She went still for a moment, before her grip renewed itself and he felt the press of her face against his neck. He stared out at the surrounding forest, listening to the cadence of breath that caressed his skin, and wondered at his own actions.

The effect she had on him, continued to have on him, would not lessen, nor would it stop, a fact he begrudgingly came to admit the day she'd nearly been killed by that beast, when its jaws had closed in on her and he had been too slow to prevent it. His reaction had surprised him, his fury that she had almost met her end, an end that he would not have been able to bring her back from. And the significance of it was not lost on him. But to abide such a weakness? A matter he warred with himself over, even after he followed her to Goshinboku, wanting to know the reason she had fled the village without warning, and tasted the tears on the air. He was not certain of what further actions he would have taken if it had not been for Inuyasha's interruption.

A noise from behind him had Lucidity stiffening, and then pulling back in alarm. Well aware of the reason, he stood, bringing Lucidity to her feet, then lifted an arm. The Whip twisted through the air and tore into the man who'd been laying motionless a moment ago, fatally wounded, but not quite dead. Sesshomaru peered back to see him standing upright, sword in hand, surprise etched across his face before he collapsed for a second and final time. Golden eyes swept across the clearing and Sesshomaru soon satisfied himself that none continued to breathe. Yet there remained the issue of the shogun; business would be unfinished if he was spared.

"Can we get out of here? As far and quick as possible, preferably," Lucidity murmured, wiping the drying blood from her mouth.

"After I have dealt with the one who gave the order of execution, we will return to the village," Sesshomaru said.

"What? No!"

His brows rose a fraction. "You do not wish the shogun dead?"

She shook her head. "No, that's not.... I just...I can't go back to the village."

"I see," Sesshomaru said, recalling the orator's speech after the executions. "And taking the life of the shogun will make no difference; his ruling has been established."

"I know," she replied. "And I know you will kill him, no matter what I say."

"You do not care if he dies, then?"

There was a moment of hesitation before she spoke. "No. But the other gaijin, they're dead?" 

A brief nod was the answer.

"Idiots," she muttered with surprising vehement in her voice, glaring at the ground. "I told them to run." 

The words renewed his curiosity. His gaze dropped to her throat as he considered how close she'd come to dying once more. And, again, he would have been too late if she had not taken matters into her own hands. If she had not managed to get away, he would be hunting down pieces of her body in the hopes that Tenseiga might revive her. The image set his teeth on edge and he found himself laying a hand on the side of her neck, covering the puncture scars. She didn't flinch this time, but lifted a questioning gaze to him. 

"How did you escape?" he asked. 

To his bewilderment, she began to undo the lower clasps of the strange clothing and reached behind her back. A moment later, he was being presented with a dagger. He took his hand from her neck in favor of picking up the weapon to examine. 

"Sango's," Lucidity said. "If I was so inclined to truly believe, I'd say divine intervention helped my escape. Sango gave me that and the clothes just before the samurai arrived. Without them, I'm sure I'd be dead by now." 

He returned the dagger and she stowed it back in the hidden folds. "Explain," he said. 

"Shackles," was the simple reply as she brought her wrists together in front of her for emphasis. "After I was taken from the village, they put me in shackles and loaded me into a cart with the other gaijin, missionaries from way they spoke. When it was dark, I had one of the missionaries get to the knife and I cut through the chains. I even tried to cut theirs, but they refused." 

Sesshomaru blinked. "Why?" 

She shook her head. "They wanted to talk to the shogun, try and reason with him, I guess." 

"Why did you wait until now to escape?" 

"I had to," she said. "The cart was kept in the middle of their camp. I could cut the shackles at night with other prisoners blocking me from view, but I couldn't jump out and make a run for it. And when we got to the village, we were herded into a hut and put under guard. But I-" 

"How is it that no one noticed your shackles were broken?" he interrupted. 

"Ah...because I hadn't broken the chain yet," she said, suddenly fiddling with the sleeves around her wrists. "I cut just enough to weaken a link so I could snap it later when I had an opening." 

She was not a stupid woman, a fact that he had learned early on, but her presence of mind under such conditions, her ability for strategic planning, inexperienced though it was, managed to surprise him; most would have succumbed to a flight of panic if given the chance. 

"The man you killed, that was your opening?" 

Her forehead wrinkled. "Yes," she murmured, looking away. "He was one of the guards. I saw him watching me, so...so, I invited his look and he-" 

His eyes narrowed. "You seduced him?" 

"Yes," was the short reply as she folded her arms. "And it worked. If he hadn't taken me to the woods-" 

"I will hear no more," he cut in. "I did not think you the sort to allow another to violate you." 

Rage flared across her face as he started to turn from her, only for a hand to twist into his sleeve, preempting his departure. He could have broken her grip without a thought, but refrained; as his mood was now, he would bruise her in the process. He listened, instead, as she spat several words in her foreign tongue before he heard his name.

"-Sesshomaru! You think I wanted his hands on me?! You think I wanted to kill him?! I did what I had to! I'm a woman; I used what I could. And don't you dare try to shame me for it!" She gritted her teeth and suddenly released his sleeve with a sharp jerk upon stepping back. "He didn't," she ground out, voice stiff with control, eyes burning bright. "He never had the chance; I made sure of it. But what would you have had me do? What choice would you have had me make between allowing myself to be executed or allowing a man to force himself onto me so that I might escape?" 

Sesshomaru did not answer, due to the simple matter that he had none to give. The thought of her so crudely debasing herself disgusted him. She was too proud, too arrogant, and he had seen for himself what she did to men who attempted to force her. And yet, in the struggle to survive, she had put aside that nature. For the sake of living, she'd been willing to sacrifice her honor. He was on the verge of telling her that it was better to die with honor than to live in shame, but could not bring himself to say the words. 

The alternative was unthinkable. He had meant to keep her safe and, instead, left her vulnerable. He ordered her to stay in the village, believing the protection to be more than sufficient, and had poorly misjudged. This chaos would have been avoided if it had not been for his mistake. Her actions, her decisions, were the result. She had been forced to protect herself by any means necessary because he, Sesshomaru, had failed to do so. Again. 

His scarred hand clenched as he turned away from Lucidity and began the trek back to the home of the shogun. There was only one possible outlet for the unbidden fury that seized him.

* * *

Half the village was destroyed and the dead decorated the land by the time Sesshomaru strolled out of the ruins. The people had fled in terror, the shogun nothing more than an empty vessel of flesh and bone. The humans who had opposed the daiyoukai joined their master quickly thereafter. And the ones who had survived would not live for long, so dictated their code for ritual suicide in the face of defeat and the loss of their shogun. Lucidity, who remained at his side and witnessed the events firsthand, had not said a word. Her pallor was blatant and there were moments when he saw her cringe and turn from the sights he laid at her feet.

Yet the only time she gave any indication that she wished him to stop was when a villager picked up the sword of a fallen warrior and made a maddened dash for her, screaming of curses she had brought to their land. Disarming the man was little more than an inconvenience, as was the effort to properly dispatch him, an effort brought to a halt when Lucidity had seized his arm and shook her head. It was at this point that Sesshomaru decided to leave the village as it was. It had not been his intent to cause any significant amount of destruction, but the commitment in which the humans attempted to protect their own was considerable and unnecessary. Only one would have died if they had not interfered.

"Your mercy was wasted; he will never be grateful to you," Sesshomaru said. "He will simply make another attempt on your life should your paths ever cross again."

"Whatever," was the dismissive reply. "Let the samurai die for the cause of their master; that's their choice. But do not touch the man who is trying to defend his home."  

Sesshomaru stopped and fixed her with a fierce glare. "You dare dictate orders to me, woman?" 

She met his gaze without so much as a hint of unease, which in itself was not unusual. Rather, it was the lack of anger he found out of place. She stared at him with a calm mask that revealed nothing to even his keen eye. He could no more understand her thoughts in this moment than he could understand her language. And the sigh that eventually escaped her was one of resignation before she continued down the path without a word, leaving a bemused daiyoukai in her wake. 

They journeyed in silence, putting further distance between themselves and the shogun's village. Though Lucidity had expressed desire for a faster means of travel, Sesshomaru did not take to air. Not to spare Lucidity or her fears, but because he had expended too much energy at this point. After weeks of hunting down and battling the vipers with little rest, and then his endless flight across the country to find the woman who pulled him from his duties, he was, by no stretch of the imagination, exhausted.

Regardless, he continued on foot, eventually moving off the well-worn road and into a forested hillside. The sun overhead had drifted low until the red and orange hues of dusk were painted upon the horizon. Kindling for fire would be required, unless Lucidity was willing to forgo that small luxury for the night. Yet when he noticed a fallen tree that would provide the necessary materials, he changed direction and walked over to the log. Lucidity was forced to step out of the way, bumping into another tree in the process and cursing softly. At first he believed it to be out of annoyance, until he caught the scent of fresh blood and looked back.

"Damn," she muttered, rubbing at her forearm.

"What is it?" he asked.

She glanced up, and then, with a sense of reluctance, drew her sleeves back. The shackles were still locked around her wrists. He could see the broken chain dangling from either end, and a thin line of blood was trickling down one hand. Coming to stand in front of her, he took hold of the arm and lifted it for closer inspection. 

"Why have you not said anything?" 

"I was going to when we stopped," she replied. "I wanted to get out of the village first." 

His lips pressed together. The skin beneath the shackles was raw and the iron was threatening to slice into her wrist; she'd been in quiet pain for hours and the realization that she had kept it from him was vexing. He directed her to sit on the fallen tree before he lowered himself in front of her, using one knee as a brace to set her hand. He turned her arm over, inspecting one side of the shackle, then the other. If he shattered it with brute strength, he risked breaking bone. The other alternative presented different dangers, but it would be easier to control the outcome. 

"Don't move," he said. "And keep your face turned away; do not inhale the toxins." He moved her hand so the palm was facing down and gripped the underside of her arm. 

"What are you doing?" she asked, leaning closer to watch in spite of his instructions. 

"You are causing me to question your intelligence, woman. Do as I say." 

She jerked back with a glare. "Fine," she said with unnecessary force and turned her head to the side. 

He heard a few muttered words in her language, but ignored what could only be insults and shifted his attention back to the task. He scraped a single claw over the surface of the shackle, testing the resistance, and then released the poison. Never had he reason to concentrate his dokkaso as he did now. It took more focus than had been expected, to ensure that merely one finger dripped with the acidic energy and that the right amount was used to melt the first several layers of iron, but not burn flesh. He felt the arm stiffen in his grasp as he drew the claw with painstaking care down the shackle, heard several more soft exclamations, and caught the scent of salt water. Yet she did nothing more, remaining absolutely still, while he kept his gaze on the iron that was rotting away until he was able to stop the flow of poison and snap the shackle off at the weakened point. 

"Shit, that stings," she said, wiping at her watering eyes.

"Indeed," he replied, looking the wrist over and satisfying himself that there was no damage. "Give me your other hand."

She obeyed and the procedure was repeated with the same results. After tossing the shackle aside, he inspected the second wrist as well, then turned the arm over, brushing his thumb across the shallow cut across the veins. But it was the palm he was interested in. He'd made note of it in the back of his mind when examining the shackles and now returned his attention to the faint redness of the seven-pointed star. 

"What?" she asked. 

He looked up at her. "Your scar has been burning as well?"

She blinked, then nodded. "I take it that's how you knew I was in trouble?" 

"It has happened before, with the vipers."

Her nose crinkled. "I forgot all about that."

"The entity that marked us wishes to keep you alive," he said. "And it is using me to do it." 

She pulled her hand from his and rubbed at her wrists as she frowned at him. "I have no idea what's going on; I've told you this before," she snapped. "And not that I don't appreciate the rescue, but I didn't ask for a protector; I'm sorry it's such an inconvenience for you." 

"That was not a complaint, woman," he said, an edge of a growl in his voice. "It was an observation." 

Scowling, she braced herself on the log and leaned forward. "Stop calling me that! Or have you seriously forgotten my name? I can't remember the last time-" 

"Enough!" He stood. "Your anger is irrational and I will not play into your games." 

"I do not play games!" she shouted, springing to her feet. 

"Then explain yourself!"

Her lips parted, expression contorted with anger, before she suddenly snapped her mouth shut and took a step back. "Forget it, just forget it." 

She started to leave and Sesshomaru's hand closed over her upper arm. He dragged her back and shoved her against the trunk of a tree, releasing her in the same movement. She gasped, wincing in pain, but didn't budge, staring up at him, her gaze anxious as her hands rested upon the tree, as though she was readying to push away at any moment. 

"Explain yourself," he repeated with a cold glare.

She snorted, baring her teeth in a sneer. "Like hell." 

He moved closer. "You are trying my patience."

She shifted, attempting to sidestep him, and his hand shot out, striking the trunk with the flat of his palm and narrowly missing her head. Her eyes flew wide and she slid down an inch or so. His jaw worked as he caught wind of her heightened scent, the jolt of fright that never failed to sweeten the aroma. And when he took another step towards her, she shrank a bit further, lowering her head and looking away, but not before he saw the pink flush of her cheeks. He leaned forward until his mouth hovered above her ear. 

"Insufferable woman," he whispered. 

He felt her shiver. The fear didn't fade, but became richer, her scent growing more potent. With the claws of one hand biting into the tree, his other hand touched her throat, feeling the steady pulse beneath his palm, then glided up the side of her neck. There was no resistance as he cupped her jawline and tilted her head up. It would not stop. Her effect, the way she unraveled him, threatened his very nature, and twisted him around until he could no longer recognize what he'd become. None of it would stop. And he realized, accepted, that he did not want it to. 

He could taste the quickened breath between her lips as the curve of his mouth closed over hers.

The soft, delicate skin molded to his own as his hand slid from the tree to wrap around her shoulders. He pulled her against him and a noise rose from her. Whether in protest or consent, he did not care. She was well and truly trapped as he held her trembling form in place, her chest heaving with every bated breath. And then she gripped the front of his armor, standing on tiptoe, pushing up, until her arms snaked around his neck and her lips parted, welcoming him, beckoning. He deepened the embrace, a growl trickling from his throat as he tasted her mouth, and she shivered again. His arm slipped lower and curled around her waist, lifting her closer, and she gasped, lips drawing back for a moment that he did not permit for long. His hand moved to the nape of her neck, fingers curling in her hair, and he kissed her again.

A human. That a human could do this to him. Challenge him, change him, make him feel, make him...fear. He wanted her and feared to lose her in the same instant. The mere thought tore another growl from the daiyoukai, louder, more feral than before and she gasped once more when his teeth caught her lip. He tasted blood as she jerked her head back, one arm falling from his neck to cover her mouth. Without a word, he pulled her hand away by the wrist and, still holding firmly to her waist, dragged his tongue over the drop of crimson on her lips. She did not resist, not even as his mouth moved down her chin and found her throat. The moment his teeth closed over the skin, she moaned and his desire for her rose. 

He cast aside everything. From the fury that had brought about the annihilation of a village to the lingering uncertainty that this should not be. All logical arguments fell away as he reached for the wooden clasp at the base of her neck and slipped it free. The idea of simply cutting through the cords crossed his mind, but there was a savory pleasure in moving his hand down to undo each one in turn. Listening to her, feeling her shift against him, increased his excitement. He wished to remember every sound, every curve, every tangible aspect that she offered. A glimpse of red caught his eye as he drew the outer layer of clothing to one side, but he found the hollow of her throat a more interesting item for his mouth to explore. She arched against him, then unexpectedly became rigid.

"Sesshomaru!" she breathed and seized his arm, fingers digging in. "Wait!"

He pushed her against the tree and his lips moved to her ear. "You cannot mean-"

"Inuyasha!"

He pulled away, taken aback to hear his brother's name of all things in this moment. Yet when he looked at Lucidity properly, it was to see her gazing past him, up at the sky, and he turned around, unwilling to believe that he'd been utterly oblivious to the hanyou's arrival. But there was no sign of him. Sesshomaru frowned, scanning the horizon that was growing dimmer by the minute, and was about to question the woman's sanity when the wind shifted and brought with it the telltale scent, coupled with two others that were as familiar as his own reflection. Moments later, Ah-Uh descended through a patch of clouds, with Jaken and Inuyasha astride him.

Sesshomaru peered back and met a pair of blue eyes filled with disappointment and longing. But she soon dropped her gaze, drawing the clasps back together, while he stood in silent astonishment. This was...unsettling. He was well accustomed to her ability to sense his presence, along with that of lesser youkai. Yet how could a human sense what he, a daiyoukai, had not?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, it wasn't a first kiss that Inuyasha interrupted, per se. Obviously this is far worse! 
> 
> Though I do love a good tease! *cackles* But seriously, hope you all enjoyed! More to come ^.^


	22. Chapter 22

Nothing could be done to mask their scents as Inuyasha jumped down moments before Ah-Un landed. And Sesshomaru was well aware that the hanyou knew, without needing to see the shocked gaze flitting between him and Lucidity or how his nose soon wrinkled and his lip curled. Inuyasha opened his mouth in preparation to say something loud, stupid, and would likely require an act of vengeance on the daiyoukai's part on principle alone.

"Choose your words with care, little brother," Sesshomaru said. "Lest I sever your tongue from your mouth."

Inuyasha blinked, but recovered a second later with a scoff. "Drop dead, yah bastard," he said. "Lucidity, you're coming with me."

"Um...and why is that exactly?" she asked, coming to stand beside Sesshomaru.

"Because you don't belong here," Inuyasha said as he walked up to them, his strides swift and hostile. And though he spoke to Lucidity, his eyes never left Sesshomaru, narrowed and distrusting, while Sesshomaru regarded him coldly.

"According to you, I don't belong in the village," replied Lucidity, folding her arms. "What's changed?"

"His wife is frantic for your return," Jaken said as he made his way over, carrying not only his Staff, but a katana Sesshomaru did not recognize. "I came across Inuyasha and the monk while trying to catch up to Sesshomaru-sama and we returned to the village together. Everyone was buzzing about your unexpected arrival, my lord," Jaken added, turning to the daiyoukai. "And how you left so hastily after-"

"Kagome said you looked pissed," Inuyasha interrupted. "I thought she was overreacting when she wanted me to go tearing off after you. But we just came from the shogun's village." His hands tightened into fists at his sides. "I knew you hadn't changed. You slaughtered all those people, butchered them like animals!"

Sesshomaru folded his arms through the sleeves of his haori. "Only the ones who were in my way."

Inuyasha's hand flew to Tessaiga. "I'll kill you, Sesshomaru! I swear on the old man, I will lop your fucking head off just like I did to your arm!"

His fingers closed over the hilt of Bakusaiga. "I invite the attempt."

Inuyasha lunged forward, and abruptly pivoted to the side, far from the mark. Lucidity gave an indignant shout as Inuyasha seized her by the wrist and began to pull her away, sneering over his shoulder at Sesshomaru. "I'll deal with you after I take her back to the village."

The daiyoukai's face tightened with anger.

"Inuyasha, no!" Lucidity shouted, struggling against his grip. "The shogun's already decreed that no person can house a gaijin. If I go back-"

"Ain't no one touching you or the village, not while I'm around," said Inuyasha. Yet she only dug her heels into the ground while trying to pry loose his hand. "Stop fighting! I'm trying to take you to where it's safe, you idiot."

"I believe she does not wish to go with you," the daiyoukai said. "I suggest you release her."

"Shut up, Sesshomaru!" Inuyasha seethed, glaring back at him, then down at Lucidity. "Listen, you don't belong with him. He practically massacred that village. He's nothing but a cold blooded killer."

"I know exactly what he is," she said, her voice rough, furious.

"Shit, you're completely fucking delusional!" Inuyasha exclaimed, but immediately started to drag her again. "You're still coming with me; it's for your own good."

Sesshomaru darted forward in a quick movement that had his brother jerking back with surprise when he found his path suddenly blocked.

Inuyasha scowled. "Get outta my way!"

Sesshomaru took a step towards him. "Release her."

"Not happening. Now move!"

He began to unsheathe Bakusaiga.

"Inuyasha, do you honestly believe that Sesshomaru is the only one who is responsible for the body count?"

In unison, the brothers stopped and peered over at Lucidity, who glanced between them before her gaze came to rest on the hanyou; Sesshomaru slowly eased Bakusaiga back into its scabbard.

Inuyasha gaped at her, his mouth hanging open. 

"The first deaths were by my hand, not Sesshomaru's," she said. "And not in self defense, either." She twisted her arm and yanked it free without any resistance this time; Inuyasha was still staring, stunned into silence. "I cut a man's throat because he served his purpose and I didn't want him raising an alarm, and mortally wounded another to keep him from alerting others that he found me." She folded her arms and gave a slight sniff. "Not entirely successful with that one, but Sesshomaru decided to show up about that time, so it worked out in the end."

The mention of his brother's name seemed to jolt some life back into Inuyasha. "You...this isn't the first time you've killed, is it?" he demanded.

Lucidity smiled and the expression was a cruel one that gave Sesshomaru pause. "Smart boy," she said. 

Without warning, Inuyasha leapt several yards away so that he was no longer trapped between them. "You two are made for each other; you're both screwed in the head," he said, his face filled with disgust. "I don't ever want to see either of you in the village again. And I don't care if you are human, Lucidity. Come near Kagome or Sango or any of us and I will send you to the Netherworld myself."

Jaken, who had been hovering by Ah-Un, came forward once Inuyasha had bounded off. "Good riddance," he muttered. "Here, Lucidity." He held up the long, thin sword.

She blinked, taking a moment to focus on the imp, and appeared confused when she did. "That's not mine."

"Sango commissioned it from Totosai," Jaken explained. "He brought it not long after Sesshomaru-sama went to find you; he always did have horrible timing. Sango wouldn't let us leave unless we agreed to give you the sword."

Lucidity relieved the katana from Jaken without a word and drew the blade, a solid white in color, a few inches free, her mouth forming into a hard frown.

"It's made from the fang and claw of the feline Sesshomaru-sama killed," said Jaken.

She slid the blade back into the scabbard with a snap and gripped it tight in both hands, eyes shut and forehead wrinkled.

"Jaken," Sesshomaru called, watching as she walked away, and the imp promptly hurried over.

"Yes, my lord? How might I serve-"

"Build a fire."

The order of a domestic chore had the imp stammering, perhaps expecting some task of greater importance. It wasn't until Sesshomaru left him that he reluctantly began to shuffle around to search for the necessary materials.

"Let me see the sword," Sesshomaru said as he came to stand next to Lucidity, whose gaze was on a grazing Ah-Un.

Mutely, she handed it over and he drew the blade free to examine it, aware of Lucidity shifting her attention onto him. A decent weapon, he thought, made with the needs of a human in mind. Yet it would be a formidable one regardless; he well remembered the damage the beast could inflict. He returned the sword to its scabbard and held it out. She looked away.

"I have no use for this weapon," he told her. "It will be better served in your hand."

She took it, again in complete silence.

"You provoked Inuyasha," he said.

She nodded.

"You manipulated him into banishing you from the village."

"He's the delusional one if he believes he'll always be around to protect everyone," she murmured.

"Yet you have no fondness for the village or its people."

"Only a few." The sword shifted in her grasp. "But even if I didn't, I'm still not going to take the risk."

Sesshomaru studied her quietly as she moved the sword into both hands and peered down at the smooth, lacquered scabbard, her hair falling forward. Her expression was troubled, a far cry from the flushed and languid appearance she'd had earlier, in a stolen moment that had come to an unfortunate end. He would have her as she was in that instant, but the time had passed; he knew she would not accept his advances for now.

"A regrettable decision to have made, but one I am not displeased by," he said and blue eyes darted over to him, half hidden by the sheen of yellow hair. He could see the frown marring her mouth. "I will not have you from my side again."

She lifted her head, startled by the admission, lips parting, but no words forming.

"Given what has just taken place, is it so difficult for you to believe?" he asked.

Her mouth closed and she considered him briefly. Then, moving the sword to her side, she stepped closer and laid a hand on his chest. "Say my name," she murmured, a shadow of a smile on her lips.

He blinked, then narrowed his eyes and grabbed her hand. His fingers squeezed carefully until uncertainty flashed across her face, and then lowered his head, his mouth finding her ear once more, and whispered, "Lucidity." The hand in his relaxed and a deep exhale of breath fluttered his hair before he drew back, just as Jaken called out that the fire had been lit.

The scrambling imp was ignorant as to what was happening around him as he tossed several twigs into the flames, then began to stack a pile wood nearby. Sesshomaru walked around the fire, removing Bakusaiga and Tenseiga from his waist, and settled down against the tree that was scarred with marks from his claws, laying the swords next to him. Lucidity joined him, yet maintained a respectable distance that she would not have bothered with had they been alone. He watched as she lifted the end of the long, outer garment out of the way so it did not snag beneath her when she sat, setting her sword aside as he had done his. He caught sight of the dark material that covered her legs and found himself idly curious about what else lay beneath. Something red, as he recalled.

"Where to in the morning, my lord?" piped up Jaken as he sat down on the daiyoukai's other side, Staff resting between his arms.

"The Isle," Sesshomaru answered.

"Really? What about the vipers?" Jaken asked.

"They will be dealt in due course."

"How do you intend to find them without the monk? Unless...Lucidity, can you detect their barriers?"

Lucidity, who'd been looking up the sky that had become patterned with stars, glanced over at the imp and shrugged. "Maybe, but without something to break the barriers, I don't see what good it will do."

"That is problematic. I'm sure there is a solution that doesn't involve the Red Tessaiga. Perhaps Kaidame would be willing to make another trade so that-"

"The vipers are my concern, Jaken," Sesshomaru said. "I will hear no more talk from either of you about the matter." Lucidity muttered something in her tongue and he looked at her. "Not in any language," he added, and she grinned.

"Yes, my lord," said Jaken, more obedient than the woman would ever be. "In the meantime, Lucidity, we should resume our lessons."

"You'll have to find me some materials first," she replied.

"You mean you have nothing on you? You always carried that book around when we were traveling. How-"

"Jaken, I wasn't exactly traveling this time," she interrupted. "I wasn't given food, let alone parchment. Be grateful that Sesshomaru got me out of there alive to even continue our lessons."

"Oh...right, that's right." Jaken shifted and moved the Staff from one shoulder to the other, looking over at the daiyoukai. "I've been wondering, my lord: how were you aware of what happened?"

Sesshomaru closed his eyes.

"My lord? I don't mean to sound disrespectful and you are very powerful, but I don't understand. You have never possessed the ability of premonition. How is it possible? Sesshomaru-sama? Hello? Are you asleep? Sesshomaru-sama?"

His brow drew down. "Enough of your prattling before I throw you into the fire."

"Ah! Yes, my lord, I will stop. My sincerest apologies. You have been traveling ever since you left so unexpectedly yesterday. You must be tired. I will-"

Golden eyes snapped open to focus on the imp. Jaken's voice failed him halfway through his babbling and he bolted to the other side of the fire when a hand tapered with claws rose. And yet Sesshomaru merely adjusted the mokomoko before he relaxed into the furs, intent upon a long rest, when Lucidity laid down as well, yawning and rolling onto her side, an arm beneath her head. Her knees pulled up into the same position she slept in every night.

"Lucidity," he called and she looked over. Without a word, he unwound the length of the mokomoko beside him and she sat up, glancing at Jaken, who was observing the spectacle in confusion, then back to Sesshomaru. He held her gaze, knowing she understood that he did not care what his servant witnessed. And yet she hesitated, at least until he beckoned her with a curl of his fingers. A moment later, she was settling onto the ground beside him, her expression one of soft wonder before the corners of her mouth hitched up in a faint smile and she laid down, her head coming to rest near his leg.

The weight of her sinking into his furs was an odd reassurance and his hand settled onto her shoulder. What he'd said was the truth; he would not have her from his side again. Whenever they parted ways, some terrible ordeal seemed to befall her; she, too, attracted enemies as readily as a daiyoukai. But even in his resolve that she would be protected, a thought continued to churn at the back of his mind until a voice rose from the depths of his memory.

_"...humans are such fragile things; none can survive being with our kind.... If you care for that human, Sesshomaru, you should do as she wishes and keep your distance. You will bring her nothing but suffering."_

His grip tightened as his chest burned with an emotion he did not care to identify. He did not notice the tension that held him until he felt the brush of fingers over his knuckles and his shoulders relaxed. He could hear Lucidity's breath growing shallow with coming sleep as her arm fell back onto the mokomoko. Sesshomaru exhaled slowly and loosened his grip, but his hand remained where it was.

Damn that woman. As the likes of one such as Inuyasha would so eloquently put it, Sesshomaru's mother and her ill advice could go to hell.

The daiyoukai surveyed the area and its inhabitants before he was finally able to close his eyes. The last thing he saw, other than Ah-Un lumbering around in the distance, was Jaken, his jaw hanging open somewhere near his chest and gaping in a shock so absolute that it went far, far beyond words.

* * *

The return to consciousness was abrupt, but not so jarring as discovering the absence of warmth beside him. Yet the scent nearby told him that she had not gone far; and when he opened his eyes it was to find her sitting in front of the campfire, legs drawn up and elbows resting on her knees. Her gaze was fixed on the sky and something glinted in her mouth; she was chewing on her silver pendent. His lip pressed into a thin line of disapproval at the childish antic as he glanced over at Jaken. The imp's snores were deep and steady, the only sound apart from the crackling sparks of the fire.

Lucidity was watching him when he peered back at her. "What are you doing?" he asked.

She let the pendent fall from her mouth. "Couldn't get back to sleep, so I thought I'd sit here in silent contemplation."

"You are troubled?" 

Her brows rose. "I don't often have peace of mind, so I'm usually in some general troubled state, yes." 

"Your mockery is not appreciated," he said coolly. 

She sighed and turned her head away, fingers brushing through her hair. "I didn't mean.... I'm just thinking, is all." 

His eyes followed the movement of her hand as she began to fiddle with the necklace once more. "What keeps you from sleep?"

"Everything." 

Her vague responses and overall disinterest would have been enough not so long ago to put an end to any potential conversation. Sesshomaru, however, had become too invested in the woman to simply ignore her and go back to sleep. Not that he didn't make the attempt, going so far as to close his eyes and settle back into the mokomoko. Yet knowing she could not rest did the same to him in turn, much to his annoyance. Only a short while passed before he looked at her again and became all the more irked by her distant stare into the fire and the forlorn expression on her face. This was unprecedented. He was not one to lend comfort. The moment beneath Goshinboku had been more of a reaction than a plan. It was tempting to simply order that she explain herself, so that he might put this from his mind and be able to rest. Abandoning any further effort to sleep, he sat up and the movement caught her attention. 

"I'm keeping you awake, aren't I?" she asked. 

"So it would appear." 

"Sorry," she muttered, bringing the pendent to her lips again. "I didn't mean to." 

"Why do you do that?" he demanded. 

She glanced over with a frown. "Do what?" 

"You put that thing in your mouth like a child." 

The necklace dropped to her chest as she straightened, her gaze sharpening, a subtle sign that he was close to overstepping some invisible boundary. "Considering it's a comfort from childhood, that's not surprising. And I don't even notice when I do it, so it's not as if I'm going to stop anytime soon." 

Sesshomaru managed to keep the revulsion from his voice when he spoke again. "How could tasting a bit of metal be a comfort?"

"Because I did the same thing with my father's necklace whenever he held me when I was little!" she snapped. "Happy now?" 

The answer brought him up short. How was it that so many aspects of her life seemed to come back around to that man? The Inu no Taisho had been a great influence in Sesshomaru's life, but that was to be expected when he sought to defeat the strongest and most powerful. Yet for a father to have the same sort of influence over a daughter was a strange concept to the youkai lord, who found himself suddenly wanting answers to sate his ever increasing curiosity, a curiosity that was almost shameful. 

"What happened to him?" 

Lucidity actually jerked in surprise at the question and stared wide-eyed at Sesshomaru. "Why do you ask?" she managed after a moment, stunned rather than angry. 

"I would know of the man whose death brought you here." 

"How did you-" 

"Inuyasha made mention of it during our travels." 

"Of course he did," she grumbled. 

Sesshomaru leaned back against the tree, the weariness of the last several weeks lingering in his bones, even if sleep eluded him for the time being. "I do not ask this lightly, Lucidity; I wish to know." 

She grunted and suddenly shifted her position, lowering one leg and leaning an elbow against the remaining knee that was drawn up, the side of her head resting on her hand, much as she had done during the night in the cave. But she had gone back to staring at the sky, rather than looking at him directly. "He...." She paused with a frown. "He was...er...he didn't.... Dammit!" Rubbing the back of her hand across her mouth, her eyes hardened into a glare.

"If you are unwilling to answer-"

"Not...not unwilling," she interrupted, speaking softly. "It's just difficult to explain. The advancements...how he was kept alive. He didn't die outright. He was...." She raked a hand through her hair again, eyes closing briefly, before she peered over at Sesshomaru. "You really want to know?"

"I would not ask otherwise," he replied.

"I suppose not," she muttered with a shake of her head. "I've just never told anyone this before, not even Kagome, and she'd be able to understand everything that I will try to explain to you."

A moment of silence lapsed between them, during which Sesshomaru watched Lucidity begin to rub the hem of her outer garment between the fingers of one hand. He had not imagined it would be this difficult for her; he hadn't considered the span of time that separated their upbringings until this point, the differences in their worlds that could make a seemingly simple explanation such trouble. He was on the verge of withdrawing his request when she finally spoke.

"A death sleep," she said. "That is the best way I can think to describe it. He was injured, severely. A-and...." Her fingers continued to wear at the hem as she cleared her throat. "His body was alive, but his mind...it was damaged. He couldn't wake up. A machine kept him alive."

"Machine?" echoed Sesshomaru, unfamiliar with the term.

"Right...um...." Lucidity looked around, as if a forest might provide the necessary translation. "Just think of...something like Tenseiga, sustaining physical life but not returning someone to consciousness. And if...if removed, the person will die."

Though he found the image she painted absurd, the idea itself was clear enough. "I see," he said. "And who was responsible for removing this...machine?"

Her fingers clenched hard on the clothing and he could smell the salt before the tears spilled down her cheeks, which she wiped away as quickly as they fell. Her voice was little more than a faint whisper when she answered, "I was."

The admission stunned the daiyoukai, who felt his eyes widening, staring in mute disbelief. His reaction could not be helped anymore than Lucidity could stop herself from weeping. He never expected such an answer. This woman, whose respect and loyalty to her father extended well beyond his death, had been the one who allowed him to die. Her reasons, whatever they were, he could not fathom. His mouth turned down at the corners, as Lucidity struggled to piece her composure back together, from shaking her head and breathing deep to wiping at her cheeks and attempting to keep her expression from contorting with pain, and apparently failing.

"Dammit!" she suddenly cursed and drew her legs up, forehead coming to rest on her knees. The scent of salt water came in earnest as she buried her hands into her hair, gripping tight. "I didn't want to, Sesshomaru. You have no idea how much I didn't want to! I shouldn't have. I _know_ I shouldn't have! I didn't-FUCK!"

Without warning, she drove her foot into the pile of burning wood. Sparks and embers flew high into the air as the flaming logs scattered and rolled. Jaken, having been awoken by her shouts, cried out in alarm and sprinted out of harm's way. This loss of control brought Sesshomaru to his feet in one, fluid movement, staring down at the woman who had always refused to react beyond a show of anger. Now she trembled, face buried, hands fisted into her hair, as a soft sound began to rise from her, and it took the daiyoukai a moment to recognize the low keening sob.

Jaken let out an indignant huff. "What is the meaning of this, Lucidity? You nearly set me on fire!" 

She didn't respond, but leaned forward, arms covering her head, and Sesshomaru heard the muffled noise of rapid, labored gasps.

"Leave us, Jaken," he ordered. 

"What?!" The imp stared. "But where am I to go, my lord?" 

"Leave!" 

The harsh command was enough to send Jaken running as Sesshomaru approached Lucidity and crouched down behind her. 

"That you reduce me to this, woman," he growled and dragged her away from the remains of the fire that continued to burn too close for comfort. She fought him, naturally, straining against his grip, even as he lowered himself beneath a tree and secured an arm around her waist. Her shout was strangled with a furious sobbing while she leaned forward, trying to clamber onto her knees in a futile attempt of escape. He pulled her back against his breastplate and wrapped his other arm around her front, his hand clutching her shoulder opposite. Her breathing hitched, coming in sharp and fast, head bent low. 

"Sessho-" she began, only for her voice to fail, unable to catch her breath.

"Calm yourself," he said, his face near hers. "You will pass out if you do not."

It did not surprise him when she turned away. He let her, as her struggles had at least ceased for now. She tilted her head back as she inhaled deeply and he caught sight of her face, cheeks wet, eyes shut, and teeth clenched tight. Another strangled noise broke from her and she bowed her head once more, hair falling forward to obscure everything from view. All humans had a breaking point, even this one. And yet it brought him no satisfaction to see what lay beneath the indifference she layered upon herself. Something raw and broken, something vulnerable that could not be touched. That a single question could so flay her, he loathed it. 

It seemed that his words had penetrated some corner of her rational mind. She was starting to quiet and her rapid breathing began to relax, along with his hold on her. She was soon laying across his lap and in the curve of his arm, her head upon the mokomoko and, by all appearances, peaceful and serene. The only evidence of this outburst of emotion lay scattered about the ground. The logs were little more than glowing embers spotted here and there in the darkness, the forest absent of dry brush and the grass too moist to risk an inferno spreading. 

After a while, Sesshomaru spoke. "You could have injured Jaken."

"I'm sorry," was the dull response. 

He paused a moment, studying her passive features, her distant gaze, the same as when he'd first awoken. "It would have been better not to have asked."

"Maybe I should not have answered," she said with no change in tone or expression. 

"Why did you, then?"

She rolled onto her back to peer up at him and he wondered briefly about her sight in the near darkness. "You wanted to know," she said. "And...I can't go home. I can't go back to the village. You're the only one, apart from Jaken, who I can talk with. Why wouldn't I tell you?" 

"A threat of violence or head injury is often necessary to pry personal answers out of you," he said.

She blinked, then suddenly sat up. He was not fully prepared for the hands that slid across his face or the lips that pressed to his. He was not accustomed to others touching him so intimately-at all, in fact-not even under these circumstances, and his initial instinct was to push her away. His hand even went to her shoulder, to do just that, before he remembered himself. Regardless, she drew back almost at once and her hands moved down to his chest.

"Earlier I was willing to share a lot more with you," she murmured. "I still am. So why wouldn't I share this, too?"

Sesshomaru didn't reply. There was no need; her point had been made. The knowledge of what had almost been was a constant thought in the back of his mind, overridden only by the knowledge of what was. With one arm still around her waist, he wrapped the other around her shoulders, holding her in place, as his chin came to rest on top of her head. The sigh he heard was content, albeit exhausted and he leaned back against the tree they were under, intent upon a long rest this time.

"I miss my father," Lucidity whispered suddenly. "But...I'm glad for this. If he hadn't passed and if our family hadn't interfered...."

"Your family?" he repeated, recalling her brief mention of the people weeks ago.

"His parents, his sister; they're the only family I have left." She shifted, pressing closer. "You asked once what separated us. This is it. The decision to keep my father alive was mine by law, as he had no spouse or other children, and they dragged me into a battle to take that away. They wanted to let him die, to send him home to their damn Heavenly Father, their deity. They didn't care for my father's beliefs, how he wanted his services or to be cremated. They wanted to take it all and they were winning and I...."

"Do not upset yourself again, Lucidity," Sesshomaru warned. "I have no patience for another outburst."

Her head moved beneath his chin and he felt the brush of her cheek against his throat, her breath on his skin when she spoke. "I'm not. I promise, I'm not. I just-"

"Enough," he said. "There is no need for further explanation. Your hand was forced and the decision to honor your father's wishes was yours with your mother dead-"

Without warning, Lucidity pulled back to stare up at him. "Dead? Who the hell told you that?"

He frowned with a sense of growing irritation. "I had assumed; you have not once made mention of her."

Lucidity shook her head. "Yeah, but she didn't die. She left me with my father and disappeared. That's why he raised me on his own."

Sesshomaru closed his eyes and slowly exhaled; in spite of everything, he truly knew so little about this woman.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter, at least the second half. But hey! You finally get to see a breakdown and learn some more about Lucidity's background, which is important, I promise. I hope it didn't drag for anyone!


	23. Chapter 23

When morning came and she began to stir, Lucidity became aware of two things: the first was that Sesshomaru's mokomoko was beyond comfortable, and the second was that her head was hurting. Both contributed to her utter lack of desire to open her eyes or move or acknowledge the waking world in any way. That meant dealing with all the bullshit baggage of insanity that had so recently happened. It was as if the universe was attempting to compensate the month of quiet peace she had more or less enjoyed in the village. In a single day she had escaped an execution; killed another man; witnessed the deaths of countless others; was exiled from the only place she could call home; finally succumbed to an emotional breakdown that included an inadvertent attempt on Jaken's life; and nearly had sex with the youkai lord she was currently laying on. Yeah, she was very much keen on staying right where she was.

"Lucidity."

Numerous groans and curses had to be suppressed and she tried to feign sleep a little bit longer.

"I know you are awake."

Her eyes slid open and the blazing sunlight had her temple throbbing. The sight of Sesshomaru was more welcoming, even if he was peering down at her with a slight furrow in his brow that suggested impatience or annoyance or something. It was too early to unravel the mystery of his subtle twitches. She was too tired, too sore. And dammit, her head fucking hurt! With a grunt, she rolled over, still on his lap, surrounded by a nest of fur that she buried her face into.

"Get off of me, woman."

"You're the one who put me here," she grumbled.

"And now I'm ordering you to get up."

"No."

"Move."

"Make me."

He made her. Or rather, he stood and let her fall where she may. She landed with a grunt and rolled onto her back, glaring up at him. He peered down at her out of the corner of his eye, combing a hand through his hair, haughty arrogance back in place.

"Aye, good morning to you, too," she muttered.

He snorted softly and walked off to retrieve his swords. 

With a groan, she sat up, rubbing her head, so tired and worn it was as if she had never slept. She looked around and caught sight of Jaken and Ah-Un waiting nearby, and then saw the ashen remains of the campfire scattered everywhere. Last night...fuck, last night had done a number on her and not in a way she would have enjoyed either. Those awful memories had come crashing in around her, crippling with the onslaught of emotions that accompanied them. The fury, the regret, the absolute resentment of herself and her family. She hadn't expected to react so violently, to work herself up to the point of panic and hyperventilation, or that Sesshomaru would play such a strong hand in bringing her back down. Her cheeks stung with embarrassment and she buried her face into her hands. There was no way she could ever let that happen again. 

Why had she told him? Why had she been willing? She'd known what she said last night when caught up in the moment, but now she just felt like an idiot. And she'd gone so far as to prattle on about her grandparents and aunt and even told Sesshomaru about that absent mother of hers, instead of letting him carry on assuming the woman was dead. Dammit! Why had she done that?! 

Sweeping her hair back in a rough, angry gesture, Lucidity stood, wanting to forget everything, and was promptly assaulted with a sword being thrown her way. Though he gave her plenty of time to react, she was so startled that she nearly dropped the damn thing. But once she had a good grip on it, she glared at Sesshomaru as he approached her. 

"It is clear that you need to resume training," he said. 

"That's nice," she muttered, holding the sword, a last gift from Sango, in one hand and undoing the toggles of her coat with the other. 

"You do not agree?" 

"I don't disagree."

Opening the coat, she slid the scabbard into the belt Sango had given her for just this purpose, then reached behind to the small of her back to ensure that the dagger still there. Honestly, how was she ever going to repay Sango for all this? But then, with a despairing, sinking sensation in the pit of her stomach, she remembered that would never be possible. The only thing she could do at this point was to stay away. Having no desire for a repeat of last night, she pushed the thought quickly from her mind and glanced over at Sesshomaru, only to feel a jolt at finding him watching her. It wasn't so much that he was watching, but that he was staring and, furthermore, he was looking down, definitely not at her face, which was feeling distinctly warm, along wih the rest of her.

"Am I...distracting you?" she asked, keeping her tone as neutral as possible. 

His eyes, a smoldering gold that had Lucidity wanting to check her pulse, snapped up to meet hers and she had to swallow, doing what she could to get a handle on her own reaction. He did not appear to be too happy, though, which helped. And when he turned in a swift movement and walked off, that definitely helped. She let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding and fiddled with the toggles while she followed at a slower pace. She managed to close the coat for the most part, but had to leave the last few toggles on the bottom open, so that she would be able to reach for the sword quickly if the need ever arose, which it likely would. Smoothing down the coat, she looked up. They had reached Jaken and Ah-Uh and both fell into step next to Sesshomaru. Jaken peered back at Lucidity, glowering. She offered a smile and waved as nonchalantly as possible. He looked away with a sharp "hmph!" 

"How're you doing, Jaken?" she asked. 

"Perfectly fine, no thanks to you," he said. 

"Yeah...er...sorry about that. Won't happen again, I promise." 

"It had better not!" 

She could only shake her head and massaged her aching temple. How long of a journey was it to the Isle? She wondered if Sesshomaru would be willing to answer. He'd seemed annoyed by her clothes, or maybe her comment, or most likely both. Her head throbbed when she attempted to think too much on it. No thinking right now. Just walking because, sadly, there was no morning routine to enjoy. No pack full of supplies. No bowls or tea or dried food. Not even a comb. She raked a hand through her hair, eyes closed. Maybe she could rest on Ah-Un. At this rate, she didn't think she'd make it very far. If she could sleep on Ah-Un.... But no, she'd fall right off, she was sure. 

A sharp pain shot through her temple and she had to press her lips together to muffle any noises of discomfort. She should find food first. And water. She hadn't eaten since the morning the samurai came. Gods, on top of everything else, no wonder she felt like crap! She opened her mouth, intending to tell Sesshomaru these rudimentary needs of a human, when something distinctly foreign and aggravating familiar shot through her, rooting her to the spot. Her spine bowed and her legs braced, but she soon sank slowly to one knee, then the other, a hand on either side of her head, which was pounding something fierce. Someone began calling her name. 

Her vision swam, but she could still make out the booted feet coming towards her and the imp already standing next to her. A hand closed over her wrist and the power burst from the ground, tearing through her, and she heard Sesshomaru grunt. The hand disappeared the next second, but the power didn't stop. Churning, it seared her veins and the agony of it was beyond endurance, beyond screaming. Sweat broke out over her skin. She felt every muscle, every bone, every molecule of her being. Everything, all of it, all of her was on fire. She couldn't move, couldn't breathe, couldn't think. The world was spinning. The ground was beneath her, but at the same time falling away, so far away, as darkness encroached and swallowed her whole. 

* * *

_The earth was quaking. The water rushed below, the waves crashing against high walls on either side. Only one path, only one hope. Jump and live. Stay and die. Solid ground began to crumble. Something was cracking. Deep inside and breaking free. The blackness would devour. Everything. Everyone. Jump and save all. Stay and save few. The choice was not removed. The choice had always been there, would always be here. A balance was necessary. The blackness threatened all. Death would come for many. But the choice was hers. Die and live or live and die._

* * *

Lucidity bolted upright, panting hard, sweat trickling down her brow. Her heart was beating a tap dance against her ribs and her skin felt as though it was humming. She was shaking, her mind rushing, as she tried to get her bearings and eventually became aware of a brush of silk against her arm and the daiyoukai crouching beside her. 

"Are you all right?" asked Jaken, who stood opposite his master. 

"Yeah...yeah, I'm fine," Lucidity said, looking up at Sesshomaru. "What happened?" 

"The entity rendered you unconscious," he answered. "Its power was greater this time; I could not touch you." 

She blinked, staring at him, and he held up a hand at the unspoken question, revealing a palm and fingers that were raw and red. She gave a sympathetic wince before pushing herself to her feet with surprising ease, Sesshomaru rising with her. After the torrent of agony, she expected to struggle, be weak in the knees, doubled over and wheezing, the whole nine. Yet she really did feel fine. The headache was even gone. Just...what the hell?

"What did it want?" Jaken suddenly asked. "Did it have a message? Sesshomaru-sama mentioned that whenever-" 

"I know," Lucidity said. "It...uh...[crap]." She brushed a hand through her hair, gathering the locks up behind her head, and tried to remember the rumbling and churning and overall bewildering meaning of what the fuck in blue blazes had just happened. But the memory had already started to fog. She just remembered being afraid, that she didn't want to do...something that would have dire consequences. Letting her hair tumble free, she covered her face, eyes shut tight, trying to picture it, but would have had better luck trapping air between her hands. 

An unexpected tug on her hair had her lowering her arms and looking over at Sesshomaru with a frown. She became all the more puzzled at the sight of him standing so close and lifting the hair to his nose, a crease in his brow. "Er...what are you doing?" she muttered.

"Your scent," he said. "It's changed." 

"Come again?" 

"The difference is slight. It is...unusual." He wrapped the locks around his hand, studying them as though he was somehow offended by what he saw.

"What is it, my lord? Do you know?" asked Jaken. 

Sesshomaru rubbed his thumb over the locks and the vague twist of his mouth said enough. He let the hair slip from his hand and Lucidity brushed it back over her shoulder. She honestly didn't know what to do with this information. A change in scent had more meaning for someone like Sesshomaru than it did for her. The most she could figure was that the entity, with all the power it had used, maybe something lingered this time.

"Come," he said. "We will find no answers here."

A smartass remark or two crossed Lucidity's mind, which she quickly dismissed. The Isle had the answers and that was all they could be certain about for now. It was their last option. As she set off with a daiyoukai, imp, and dragon as if it was the most normal thing in the world, she wondered how Kagome would or already had reacted when Inuyasha showed up empty handed. Not only that, would Inuyasha tell her the reason? Probably. He'd never much liked Lucidity anyway and was no doubt eager for an excuse to see the back of her. Shacking up with his "evil" brother was a good enough reason, she supposed. Well, that and the whole willing to kill humans thing.

There was much to ponder over as the hours passed. So much, in fact, that Lucidity didn't really notice the steady travel of the sun across the sky. She was lost in thought, keeping pace with the group, and was sometimes interrupted by Jaken, who asked questions regarding their lessons, recounting what he remembered and seeing if he was correct. And at the same time, he seemed to be prying. He eventually strayed off topic and began asking about the samurai. She told him about being taken. Then he asked about the shogun's village and her escape. She told him that, too. He asked about Sesshomaru's arrival. She told him. He asked about what had happened afterwards. She told him about the shackles, and how that was when he and Inuyasha had arrived. But then Jaken asked if anything else had happened before he found them. She didn't tell him. And when he asked again, a flying rock struck him in the head. She blinked at the downed imp, for once innocent of the crime, then over at Sesshomaru, who had not broken stride and didn't so much as glance back.

Another hour or so went by in silence after that. The sun was high in the sky and would be starting its descent soon when Sesshomaru left the group abruptly with a brief order to stay in the area; Lucidity had a shrewd idea as to the reason. Jaken led Ah-Un to a river nearby and the two heads dipped into the swift, choppy current to drink. Lucidity knelt to do the same, minus the head dipping.

"Any idea where he went off to?" she asked Jaken, more in the effort to make some sort of conversation with the sullen imp.

"Probably sniffed out something interesting," he sighed, setting down his Staff. "He never tells me anything, even after all my years of loyal service. Decades I've been at his side and now you come along!" He stomped a foot. "How could Sesshomaru-sama have such interest in you?! You're a human. I knew he took after his father in many ways, but I never imagined this!" Jaken rubbed at his large eyes, shedding great, fat tears. "Why am I always the one cast aside?"

Once upon a time, Lucidity might have found this little spectacle amusing. Jaken was such a pain in the ass most of the time. But when he wasn't hurling insults, he was decent enough to talk to. And the handful of lessons they'd been able to have together revealed he was rather intelligent; he almost never forgot anything she'd taught him so far and was able to deduce things on his own without much help. Watching him cry into the sleeve of his robes, she came to the irritable conclusion that she felt sorry for the little bastard. Maybe some odd sort of affection or guilt, too, which could explain why she moved to kneel beside him and placed a hand on his shoulder. He jumped at the touch and stared at her in surprise.

"Jaken, if Sesshomaru has kept you around this long, one human isn't going to change anything," she said. 

"But you-"

"Decades, centuries," she interrupted. "That's what you have with him. I won't have near that long. You'll have him all to yourself again before you realize it."

He waved his arms in protest. "No I won't! Not if you have children together!"

She wrapped him on the head with her knuckles, not enough to hurt, but he flinched nonetheless. "Honestly, Jaken! No talk of children this early on. What's wrong with you?" She stood and folded her arms. "Besides, any children Sesshomaru has would just make you Uncle Jaken."

Rubbing his head, Jaken stared up at her. "Huh? Uncle? That would be Inuyasha, not me."

"Take it as a term of endearment," she said. "I'd at least insist they call you 'uncle.'"

Large eyes grew all the larger with astonishment and his mouth fell open. "Wow! Really?! Any children you have with Sesshomaru-sama would know me as their uncle?"

Lucidity did her best not to grimace; she just couldn't imagine something so long term right now, not with everything else that was going on. Maybe...one day. Yet at the moment, all she could do was shrug and say, "Sure. Why not?"

It was enough to cheer the bugger up at least. Without warning, he grabbed his Staff and darted upstream, suddenly quite full of energy, but stopped and shouted back to her, "I'm starving! I'm going to see if I can catch us some fish. Why don't you build us a fire while I'm gone? Stay close to Ah-Un!" And he was off running again.

She shook her head and decided not to mention this to the youkai lord; he'd do more than a gentle tap of knuckles. And now she had to build a fire from scratch. Wonderful. Nothing was better than rubbing two sticks together. Passing by Ah-Un, she patted him absently and apparently this prompted him to start following her. She didn't mind one way or another as she searched for material. Dry bramble mostly, while a half-dead tree offered up some old branches that were barely hanging on. She dragged the lot back to the water with Ah-Un lumbering in her wake. Maybe she could just break apart the branches and wait for Jaken to get back with the Staff.

A caress of energy on the wind had her pausing in her work, but she soon went back to pulling some of the bramble off that had become tangled with the wood. She was crouched over the mess while Ah-Un walked around, sniffing at the ground before returning to the river for another drink, ignoring both the woman and daiyoukai, who had came to stand behind her.

"Where is Jaken?" he rumbled above her.

"Fishing, or trying to. Where were you?"

"Killing the youkai following us."

"I thought there were a few nearby," she muttered absently. She slid the last of the bramble free and stood, peering down at the kindling. Perhaps there was a stone she could find for a fire striker. Yet before she could even consider searching for one, a pair of hands came to rest on her shoulders. "What are you doing?"

"I do not care for this new scent," Sesshomaru said.

She realized, with a slight start, that his mouth was right above her ear. Why he insisted on doing that...hell, she knew very well why and attempted to pull away, only for his hands to tighten. She let out a huff, more exasperated than anything, and had to resist the urge to stand on his foot. "I can't exactly do anything about it," she said. "Is it really so bad?"

"It is unfamiliar to me and does not belong on you."

Again, with his voice in her ear and threatening to make her knees buckle, she tried to get away and even managed a few steps before he dragged her back. "Come on, Sesshomaru," she groaned. "Jaken could be back any minute."

"It is no fault of mine that you are so easily susceptible," he replied smoothly. "I have told you before that you must learn better control."

She elbowed him hard for that one and, to her surprise, he released her with a grunt. And by releasing her, that meant moving out from behind her so suddenly that she lost her balance and dropped straight to the ground. "What the hell?!" she shouted, sitting up.

"That hurt," Sesshomaru said, peering down at her.

She blinked; it wasn't like him to complain about a little pain. Getting to her feet, she brushed the dirt off her coat. "Okay, fine. I didn't mean to hurt you, but-"

"You misunderstand," he cut in. "You should not be capable of hurting me."

"I...what?" She stared. "What do you mean?"

He stepped up to her and, without a word, took hold of her hand. The scarred one, she noted, as he inexplicably laced their fingers together. The memory of that first day rushed through her mind when she felt the gentle pressure of his grip begin to tighten. She glanced at their hands, then back to his face, studying the minute shift in expression, of his lips thinning and the way his eyes flickered and narrowed. He was applying more pressure and Lucidity was torn between fascination and being downright unnerved.

"What are you doing?" she finally asked, all but demanded. He didn't answer, but squeezed again, harder, and she winced. "Enough already! That's starting to hurt."

"Only starting?" Sesshomaru echoed as he released her. "Your hand should be broken by now."

She moved back, rubbing at the slight ache in her hand, heartbeat quickening at the implication that was finally dawning on her. "The...the entity," she murmured.

"It has made you stronger."

* * *

The fire was never built. Not that Jaken was able to complain, considering his master had been the one to overrule his request. Instead of struggling to make a fire the old fashioned way, Lucidity was subjected to a new series of tests that left her winded, sore, and aching by the end of the day. Hours, the training had lasted. Sesshomaru had not relented. He'd wanted to see the extent of what the entity had done, the change it had wrought. Not only in her strength, but endurance, speed, recovery, and so on, and he never seemed satisfied with the results. As soon as she believed they were done, he ordered her to take up arms once more. There even came a point when he tested her reflexes by striking at her with the Whip in every conceivable way possible, every angle imaginable, while she struggled to block the blows with her sword. Over and over, until she was a dead weight by the time night fell. At least she was able to sleep on his mokomoko again and every night that followed. 

The routine of travel descended on the group as the days passed. The hours of trudging along were broken by the occasional stop to rest, train, or find food. Lucidity discovered she did not have much of an appetite. She ate when Jaken declared he was hungry, which had never been as often as her to begin with. Now she found herself eating less than the imp and had a feeling that if he wasn't there, she'd forget entirely. Sleep came sporadically as well. Though she was often exhausted because of the amount of sparring Sesshomaru insisted upon, she found herself waking up more frequently in the middle of the night, laying there for however long, before she was able to drift off again.

All these changes, everything that had happened, was happening, made her want to curl up and never move sometimes. Or better yet, move in the other direction. The closer they came to the Isle, the uneasier she became. There were supposed to be answers there, an explanation for the madness that had become her life. And yet, it seemed as if part of her didn't want to know, a large part at that. She'd always been reluctant to go to the Isle, and the thought of finally finding answers was not as comforting as it had once been. If anything, she was anxious, as if somehow it would go all wrong, become worse and.... She just didn't know.

Sesshomaru, Jaken, and Ah-Un all stood at the edge of a great canyon, while Lucidity hung far back, her stomach a pit of knotted nerves. Beyond here, another day's journey. That was what Sesshomaru had said a moment ago. That was how close they were to the Isle of the Four Sisters and Lucidity suddenly had no desire to travel any further, for more than one reason. But she had to, she knew. She still remembered what Kaidame had told them and the stories of what was happening around the country and it all somehow came back to the Isle. So, when Sesshomaru mounted Ah-Un and called out to her, she approached him with willing reluctance and let him reach down to lift her onto the saddle in front of him, while Jaken settled himself behind the daiyoukai.

The moment the dragon rose into the air, Lucidity closed her eyes and focused, instead, on the one who had his arm around her waist. Days it had been and they had done nothing but train and travel. Moments alone were almost non-existent. There had been times when Jaken was absent, however briefly, but nothing more ever happened. If it wasn't for the nights spent resting on his furs, the memory of his touch, of his mouth might as well have been a dream. On impulse, she pressed closer, turning her face towards his armored chest, and glanced up. The line of his profile greeted her. He was gazing straight ahead, but just as she decided to get comfortable and enjoy the view, he abruptly turned his head to the side. On reflex, she followed his line of sight and, with a shock, sat up, her jaw dropping, as she peered around.

Sesshomaru looked back at her with a frown as she leaned away from him and his arm tightened when she looked right over the side of Ah-Un and down into the canyon. Laughter spilled from her. Amazed, filled with ecstatic wonder, she fell back into the mokomoko, arms around her stomach, and laughed for the sheer elation that claimed her.

"What's wrong with her, my lord?" she heard Jaken say.

There was no answer from the daiyoukai.

Lucidity was wiping tears from her eyes by the time they landed on the other side of the canyon. She jumped down before anyone else and hurried to the precipice, standing as close to the edge as she dared, which was with the toes of one foot threatening to dangle right over. Nothing happened. No ringing. No dizzy spells. No overwhelming, crippling anxiety that attempted to rob her of consciousness. And when a hand closed over her upper arm and dragged her back, there was no rush of vertigo or loss of equilibrium; though she did stumble at the force in which Sesshomaru yanked her from the cliff.

"Has the entity taken your common sense along with your fear of heights?" he growled, releasing her. "The ground could still give way, idiot woman."

"Don't ruin this for me!" she exclaimed, and yet was still smiling. "I haven't been able to do this since I was a kid!" When he started to walk away, she followed. "Hey! Could I take Ah-Un? I won't go far, promise. Sesshomaru? Hey, Sesshomaru, answer me." She tugged at his sleeve, only for him to shake her off.

"Enough," he said, and his threatening scowl had her grinning. "You are coming with me. Jaken, continue on with Ah-Un."

"Ah, am I in trouble?" Lucidity snickered. 

The unimpressed look sent her way suggested she just might be. But Sesshomaru apparently had no interest in conversing while she was behaving so...well, childishly. Of course, she wasn't going to let this kill her good mood. As others set off towards the east, she and Sesshomaru headed in the opposite direction, towards a tall, white mountain that was almost like a pillar jutting out of a surrounding forest. Even from a distance, she had a sense of the numerous youkai who dwelled here.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

He didn't respond, but increased his pace as they entered the forest. She kept in step beside him and glanced over. His expression was smooth, giving no hint to his thoughts, and though she was certain he knew she was watching him, he did not acknowledge her.

"Sesshomaru?"

"Quiet," was the short reply, void of any anger, but not exactly reassuring.

"Are you actually mad?"

"I will be if you refuse to listen."

All right. Now her good mood was being killed. She stopped and folded her arms, waiting until he turned around before she spoke again. "I'm not taking another step until you tell me what you're doing."

"It should not be beyond your understanding that your training must be adjusted for this new development," he replied, his voice cold. "Now come."

Her hand flexed at her side, as though aching to reach for her sword then and there. Asshole, she thought. Was it so difficult just to explain that in the beginning instead of pissing her off? Yet, as she promised, she went with him deeper into the forest, rather than picking a fight, until they reached a clearing. He stopped, gazing around, while she waited off to the side, arms folded, and wondered why the hell they had to come this far for a bit of training. And unless he flew them to the top of that mountain, she didn't see how testing this lack of fear when it came to heights would work on the ground.

"Stay here," Sesshomaru suddenly said.

Lucidity, who had been peering in the other direction, looked around sharply at the order, only to find herself alone in the clearing. She hurried over to where he'd been standing a moment ago and peered through the foliage and trees, but caught no glimpse of white or silver. A quick scan of the sky had the same results. She could still feel his aura, a heavy blanket in the area, but she could not pinpoint any exact location. Being left alone really wouldn't be a problem for her if it wasn't for all the other youkai she could sense nearby. Not terribly close, but enough to put her on edge. Yet Sesshomaru must be aware of them; he probably intended to take care of the nuisance while she sat back and waited.

"Jerk," she muttered.

What the hell was he doing? Honestly! And spoiling her good mood. Out of everything to come out of what the entity had done to her, she was more excited by this than anything. She didn't like being toyed with, her strings pulled. She didn't know what the entity had planned for her, why it wanted to make her stronger or faster. But this, to no longer be afraid of at least one thing in this mad world of youkai and Seers and death, was a blessing among curses and-

Lucidity unsheathed her sword, the motion was slow, careful, and she held the weapon at her side, point down. She could feel the gathering movement, the sweeping aura through the forest. Something was coming. And Sesshomaru wasn't here. Close by, but not here. She swallowed, her grip tightening on the hilt, as her heartbeat echoed in her ears. Faster. It was moving faster. Just behind her. She couldn't hear anything. No lumbering footsteps. No breaking branches. But it was moving as though carried by a swift current. She turned and braced herself, ready to flee, break and run. No matter what had happened or how she had changed, she didn't know if she could survive a youkai attack and.... Dammit to hell! Where the fuck was Sesshomaru?!

A form burst through the tops of the trees to her left. Caught by surprise, she jumped back, bringing the sword up before she even saw what it was. The creature shrieked as the blade sliced off a wing and then its head. Lucidity watched the pieces fall to the ground and frowned, kicking over the head that was larger than her foot. It looked like a white dinosaur, a pterodactyl perhaps. Another shriek, another caress of energy on the air and she was swinging again at a second creature, as easy to dispatch as the first.

And yet...it was like ants. First one, then two, and now a third one soared down from yet another direction. Lucidity spun, able to do little beyond react, as the third brought a fourth and a fifth. The ground was becoming littered with bits of white bodies, sprays of blood, and Lucidity began to lose count. She didn't even think. She couldn't. She turned, ducked, jumped, dodged as she sliced and carved through the air, narrowly missing being grabbed by sharp claws or impaled on wicked long beaks. And Sesshomaru was still no where to be found, leaving her with a rather startling revelation that would explain his absence. And she was going to fucking kill him!

A chorus of cries and screeches almost had her dropping her sword in favor of covering her ears. Yet as she cut down the last of the youkai flapping overhead, she turned to see the source of the noise and felt the color drain from her face. A cloud of these daemonic birds was swooping down from the mountain, more rising from the trees. Dozens. Hundreds. The ones that lay dead at her feet were pitiful in comparison to the vast number that now filled the sky, coming straight at her. She had no choice but to turn tail and nope the fuck out of there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So a bit more lighthearted than the previous chapter. And look! More stuff is happening. Yay for stuff!


	24. Chapter 24

Tearing through the trees, leaping over roots, and skirting beneath branches were a stark reminder of a similar sprint through another forest so many weeks ago. Of course, Lucidity had been trying to escape a more metaphorical threat at the time rather than a literal one. But just like then, she felt the heartbeat that raced through her body, heard her own heavy breathing, and how her feet pounded along the earth, following no trail, but letting the adrenaline take her to some sort of semblance of safety in this godforsaken era. Yet the youkai above never ceased their pursuit, their wings flapping, their calls a chorus of fury and promises of death by way of beaks and talons. Not an end she wanted to have. She could feel them swooping overhead, coming in lower, and she turned on instinct, slicing one clean in half that had been so close, before she bolted again.

Breath was coming sharper now. There was a pain in her chest. And her foot almost caught a root that she managed to jump at the last minute, but stumbled, losing precious seconds. A youkai shrieked above her. She turned back again and dodge the pair of outstretched clawed feet heading right for her face. One glittering talon caught her cheek and she felt a line of blood trickle from the wound as she brought the sword down. The youkai fell in two pieces. Lucidity, legs trembling, peered up at the massive horde coming closer. Where was Sesshomaru?

Doubt seeped into her mind. Maybe this really was a surprise attack. Maybe he never intended this to happen. Had something captured him? Delayed? Was that why he wasn't here? She tried to focus, search for his aura, but her thoughts were sporadic, her emotions running too high. All she knew for certain was that these daemonic birds were closing in. Gripping the sword tight in both hands, she straightened, ready to take as many of the fuckers as she could if they were so intent on killing her. Another one was breaking from the flock, apparently eager to be next.

The sky exploded in a shower of crackling energy. In one, single burst of what appeared to be emerald lightning, the youkai disintegrated. Without sound, without warning. Completely gone, with only bits of skin and bone raining down to hint that they had been there at all. Lucidity's arms swung down to her sides. The sword slipped from her grasp, just as Sesshomaru appeared, oh so casually emerging from the trees and sheathing Bakusaiga. She could only stare as he came to stand in front of her, his gaze sweeping over her countenance before he reached out and wiped the blood from the cut on her cheek with his thumb.

"You did well for a human with such limited experience," he said upon licking the blood away.

A muscle twitched near her eye and she shoved at him with a wordless shout. Her strength as it was forced him back a few steps and she went for her sword. Next thing she knew, a hand had closed over her wrist, spun her around, and she was suddenly trapped against Sesshomaru, his arm a steel vice around her shoulders, her back against his breastplate.

"[You son of a bitch!]" she yelled. "You set me up! You left me there on purpose!"

"It was necessary," was his calm reply.

"Like hell it was!" Energy very much renewed, she started to struggle. Yet even after what the entity had done, she was no where near coming close to Sesshomaru's strength. He only had to put some effort into holding her in place now, instead of none.

"Setting you against a true enemy was the only way to test the full range of your abilities," Sesshomaru said as his other arm slid around her waist. "And as I mentioned, you did well. You killed enough to draw the entire nest out."

"Lucky me," she snapped, squirming against both arms and barely managing to put a few inches of distance between them. "Dammit, Sesshomaru, I'm going to kill you, I swear to-"

He pulled her back, jerking her upright so that her frame pressed against the entire length of his body. "Of that I am doubtful," he said, then suddenly leaned in and bit her ear.

Lucidity stiffened, letting out a startled cry, as the bite went straight through her. Her eyes screwed shut as she felt her hair being drawn aside and his mouth touched the side of her neck, teeth, lips, and all. "No, no, no. I'm mad at you. I-oh!" She gasped as teeth found the back of her neck and sent a shock down her spine. A low rumble rose from the daiyoukai. Gods! It almost sounded like a purr and-fuck! There were his teeth in her nape again!

"You were never in any true danger," he said as his fingers came to her throat, grasping the first toggle and sliding it free. "I was watching before you killed the first youkai." His hand moved along her chest, releasing one toggle after another. "Your instincts, your reflexes." He drew the coat from her shoulders and slid it down her arms, letting the material flutter free like a gust of wind. "Your resilience," he whispered into her ear. "Witnessing your display was...invigorating."

A growl rose from his throat and she shuddered, an involuntary gasp escaping her. His hand was on her stomach, easing beneath her shirt, and she groaned at his warm touch on her bare skin. But rather than moving up like she was expecting, the hand moved down and took hold of the belt at her waist. Before she realized it, the belt, along with the scabbard, joined the coat on the grass. A second later, so did the dagger, tossed aside so carelessly. And then his hands were beneath her shirt once more, gliding upward, lifting the clothing away. The air was cool against her sweaty skin and she shivered as her breasts were exposed. The palms of his hands barely skimmed the contracting nipples when he brought the shirt up and over her head.

She leaned back against Sesshomaru, her head coming to rest on his shoulder, the mokomoko brushing her cheek. She was suddenly very conscious of how her chest heaved with every breath she took, especially with his hand coming to a stop between her breasts. Her heartbeat was directly beneath his fingertips and she couldn't help but believe he was intentionally feeling the rapid drumming inside her chest. And then his mouth was on her throat once more and she moaned while his hand shifted to cup a breast, thumb and finger closing over the nipple. Her legs pressed together as the pleasure tightened between them, a growing ache that had her pushing back, reaching behind her, and becoming so very frustrated to find all that armor blocking what she desperately wanted.

Yet he didn't seem to notice. He rolled and pinched and practically had her squirming from the assault on her nipple alone when his hand suddenly disappeared, only to reach up and grip her chin, forcing her head back and pressing his lips to hers in a rough kiss. And, yeah, that was his tongue in her mouth and his teeth biting and his hand around her waist, slipping down, pushing beneath her leggings. She gasped and barely managed to stop herself from crying out, hooking an arm around his neck, as his fingers slid into her wet folds. She arched, twisting her hips, as he rubbed the hard nodule of pleasure that had her shamelessly bucking. She heard him groan, a brief, barely audible sound that had her eyes, which had been closed all this while, fluttering open.

His face was inches from hers and there was no hiding the flush in his cheeks, nor the heat in his eyes. There was no haughty, collected composure but a bestial need in his gaze. And when he saw her watching him, his teeth clenched and he let out an unrestrained growl that was pure and feral and as far from human as possible. She kissed him, with a need that was nearly brutal, a hand working into his hair. And when she turned around, he didn't stop her, even if it meant removing his fingers. The loss of warmth only fueled her to kiss him harder, her hands going to his waist. She made short work of the sash around his armor, but the armor itself proved too much. And when she could not find a possible seam or buckle, he stepped back and did the work for her. And she be damned if she didn't watch for future reference.

Within moments, armor, pauldron, and swords were on the ground and he was shrugging his haori off, the mokomoko already laying by his feet. Without warning, he seized her by the shoulders, pulling her into another kiss that left her breathless and her head swimming and she didn't immediately notice that when he began moving his mouth over her throat that he was actually lowering himself onto his knees. His lips and tongue left a hot trail on her stomach as her hands combed through his hair, coming to rest on the back of his head, while he peeled the leggings down her thighs. She was positive he must have removed her boots, too, because she was soon standing there without a stitch of clothing on. Yet she had stopped paying attention around the time she felt his mouth between her legs. She gasped, doubling over, fingers tightening in those silver strands, and was certain she was not mistaken that this was the great youkai lord of the western lands on his knees before her, easing his tongue inside her, and making her so damn weak that she could barely remember her own name. She could definitely remember his, though, because she kept calling it, with his tongue working her over, sending shivers up and down her body as the pleasure started to rise, a warmth churning low in her stomach and a hard tightening between her thighs. 

And then his mouth was suddenly gone. She was being dragged down, falling into his arms, her legs being brought around his waist. His hand was at the small of her back, guiding her, and she felt the length of him hot and swollen against her entrance before he pushed inside. Her moan was deep and long as he filled her like a breath of fresh air, her arms around his neck, head tilted so far back that she saw nothing but sky. His hands came to rest on her hips, easing her down the last few inches until she was settled completely on his lap and held her there. His mouth was between her breasts and she felt the gentle touch of his tongue on her skin. But it was his soft panting that caught her attention, the way his shoulders heaved beneath her arms, and she peered down, mesmerized at seeing this side of him.

Her hands brushed through his hair, pulling the locks back, as she rolled her hips. The movement was slight, had her throbbing around his length, and she moaned as she deliberately contracted herself around him, pulling a groan from the daiyoukai. He lifted his head, his hand going to the back of her neck, and she saw the heady need so raw in his expression before he drew her down. Not into a kiss, but to run his tongue along the cut in her cheek. And in the same instant, his arm wrapped firmly around her waist and he thrust up. A soft cry broke from her as she clung tight to him, and didn't care when he did kiss her with the taste of blood on his lips. He was moving inside her, lifting her in a smooth, deep rhythm, and she moaned into his mouth, her breasts crushed against his chest. Her hands glided over his back, nails raking across the skin, and he growled once more, his teeth closing onto her lip. Almost in warning, it seemed, until he slid his mouth to the junction of her neck and shoulder and bit down hard. She bucked against him, crying out, as the shock of pain mixed with pleasure, and decided he obviously had a biting fetish.

He never stopped, never so much as paused. His stamina, his strength. He held so much back and yet she was drowning, now knowing that the cold indifference of his nature could crumble into such burning passion that left her a ragged, gasping mess. She could feel the sweat trickling over her skin, how his hands slid so easily along her body, bringing her to him, as his hips rocked into her over and over, his length finding that secret spot inside, forcing the cries from her lips. Once more, the pressure was mounting and this time there was no stopping it. Her voice rose higher and higher until it hit the final crescendo as the orgasm seized her in its sweet embrace and she held that moment of ecstasy, riding it out, while burying her face into the long, silver hair, wanting to see and smell and remember nothing else.

Suddenly, she was on her back and the mokomoko was around her. The fur clung to her wet skin. She peered up, her body still humming, as Sesshomaru leaned over her, one arm above her head, the other bringing a leg around his waist, and drove himself into her. She tossed her head back, her voice tearing from her once more. She was so damn sensitive that she couldn't stop her trembling, twisting response. And he kept going, pressing his face into the curve of her neck, until she was certain something would break, that she would cry out for mercy, that it wouldn't be enough, that she wouldn't be enough. But then he stiffened against her and a heavy, drawn out moan echoed in her ear. He gave one last, shuddering thrust before he went still and the weight of his body sank onto her.

He was still wearing his hakama, she realized absently. The silk was smooth beneath her foot as she allowed her leg to drop from his waist, feeling what would later be a sweet ache in her muscles. He started to shift, drawing himself out, and she shivered, her arms immediately curling around his neck and refusing to let go. After one feeble attempt to pull away, he apparently admitted quick defeat and laid back down. She smiled when his head came to rest on her shoulder, his hand running down her arm opposite, and she turned her face into the silver crown, inhaling deeply. For a long while they lay there, drifting in the dreamy aftermath of pleasure until Sesshomaru eventually rolled onto his back, only to promptly drag Lucidity to him. Her head came to rest on his chest. She listened to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat as she peered down and noticed, to her disappointment, that he'd already tucked himself away. Next time, she thought, smiling. 

* * *

The water was a refreshing relief as the sweat, grime, blood, and other fluids of the afternoon washed off in the lake Sesshomaru had brought them to. A roaring waterfall offered a soothing lull and the mist drifted through the air, clinging to hair and skin alike. Lucidity would have been happy to stay right here until nightfall. But since that would never be possible, she procrastinated as long as she could, helped inadvertently by Sesshomaru, who had decided to strip and step in to bathe right along with her, if not some yards apart. It was very...distracting. The long line of his body was hard, lean muscle and broad shoulders and firm backside. Lucidity tilted her head, the better to inspect the last part, but that damn mokomoko over his shoulder was getting in the way. And then he went too deep into the water to see anything, which only made her determined to ensure that she was watching when he came back out. 

In the meantime, she completely submerged herself and worked her fingers through the tangled locks hair that floated around her, rinsing out the bit of soaproot she'd been fortunate enough to find. Such a small luxury that she'd taken for granted back home, with so many options and easy access to whatever she wanted. These days she was ecstatic just to bathe in water that was relatively warm, regardless if she had anything akin to soap or not.

Though her lungs started to burn in protest, she rubbed at her legs and feet for some semblance of scrubbing clean, then her arms and shoulders until, finally, she pushed herself up, head breaking the surface, and took a gulp of fresh air. Automatically, she glanced over to where the daiyoukai had been and discovered, much to her annoyance, that he was gone. Yet a glimpse of silver out of the corner of her eye made her jump and she spun around. Nope, not gone. Just standing behind her. 

"[Bloody hell,] Sesshomaru, you scared me," she breathed. "What were you doing?" 

"I should think it obvious," he replied. 

She shook her head. "You know...I don't think it is, not this time. I can imagine several scenarios right now." 

"Such as?" 

"Attempting to pounce me again for starters?" she offered a bit wryly. 

He blinked, but beyond that there was no change in his lofty expression. "I assure you I do not pounce." 

She grinned. "Is that so?" 

"Yes," was his bald response. "I merely came to investigate why you were under water for so long. You will know when I desire you again." 

"Uh...yeah, right," she muttered, lowering her gaze and rubbing the back of her fingers against her mouth, as heat crept along her cheeks. Why did he have to be so damn blunt? And why did she have to blush? After what just happened, there wasn't anything to be embarrassed about. The sound of dripping water reached her ears before his hand brushed through her hair. Fingers became entangled in the wet locks as his hand moved down and she couldn't help but tilt her cheek into the curve of his palm. Water licked up her stomach as he waded closer and she closed her eyes moments before she felt the press of lips to her forehead, chasing the foolish blush from her cheeks. No, there was nothing to be embarrassed by, and so much to be grateful for. 

"Would that you'd been born youkai."

The spell broke and Lucidity pulled back, surprised and a bit confused by the unbidden declaration. "What do you mean by that?"

Sesshomaru blinked, as though just as surprised at his own words, then slowly removed his hand and straightened. "Nothing," he said, and something shut behind his gaze, the aloofness of the youkai lord returning. He began making his way back to the bank.

She caught his arm. "Oh no you don't. You can't just blurt out something like that and walk off. Why did you say that?"

He looked back and there was nothing that she could read in his stoic expression. "I explain myself to no one, woman." He pulled himself free of her hand and managed to take a few more steps before she was in front of him, putting a hand on his chest.

"You will explain yourself to _me_ , Sesshomaru!" she snapped. "What did you mean by wishing I was youkai?"

It seemed no matter the circumstances, they could still find a way to argue, even when standing together completely naked in water that was barely waist high. She could see the anger tightening around his mouth and how his fingers twitched at his sides, as if he was refraining from summoning his Whip.

"I misspoke," he replied in a low, albeit stiff voice. "And we shall leave it at that."

"Like hell," she said. "Answer me already! Is it not enough? Do you wish you had someone who was more? Is being with a human a shame for the great daiyoukai? What-"

A hand shot out and closed over her upper arm with enough strength to wrench a startled note of pain from her as Sesshomaru yanked her up high enough that she could no longer feel the bottom of the lake beneath her feet. "After everything I have done," he whispered in a tone that was deadly calm, and yet burned with an undercurrent of fury to chill the blood, "do you truly think so little of me?"

The rage that was contained in the hard lines of his face drained the color from hers, or so she could only assume, as she was rapidly losing feeling in many parts of her body, hands and feet included. Her lips parted, but no sound came out. Could she simply say that she misspoke as well and be done with it? Yet she had a hunch that she'd insulted him too deeply this time for it to be swept under the rug. And when he flung her away so that she landed in the water beside him, she knew she wasn't wrong in that assumption at least.

He was striding onto the bank by the time she found her feet and almost fully dressed by the time she reached the spot where she'd left her clothes and weapons. The tension in the air was thick enough taste, let alone cut. Lucidity was at a loss. Her head was spinning so fast she could barely keep up the thoughts. She went through the motions of pulling on her clothes and securing the sword and dagger while trying to make sense of what just happened. She felt slighted by his comment. Did he not realize how inadequate it made her feel? Or had he been a complete...well, guy about it? Oblivious to the emotional response because he was too focused on the logical one? Whatever that logical one might be. But had she gone too far? Accusing him of being ashamed when all he had done was to the contrary? Had she really, in one fell swoop, belittled his integrity so completely?

* * *

What was the phrase? To do a one-eighty? That was what today had become. By the time dusk fell and they reached the campfire that Jaken had built, Lucidity and Sesshomaru had not spoken to one another since leaving the lake, whereas moments before that they had exchanged much more than simple words. Lucidity couldn't fathom how to begin another conversation, at least not without starting off with some type of apology. And yet, she had difficulty phrasing one in her head without somehow bringing up what he had said and making another demand for an explanation. She played through so many scenarios that her brain felt like a wrung sponge and she honestly didn't know if she had it in her to have any sort of meaningful talk. Too much had happened. She was too confused.

It would be better to wait until morning, she decided as she sat down in front of the fire while Sesshomaru walked right past her, Jaken, and a sleeping Ah-Un, ignoring the imp's delighted greeting, and went to stand far apart from the group. Her gaze lingered on his silhouette against the darkening sky and, though she hated every moment, it really would be best to sleep on this, before she attempted to speak with him, make some sort of fool of herself or become angry again or....

"Has something happened?"

Jake's voice cut through her thoughts and Lucidity looked over at him with a slight frown. "Nothing I care to talk about," she said. At first, it appeared as if Jaken was about to press for more details, but then he nodded and suddenly picked up something from the ground.

"Here," he said as he came over and held out a pear. "I found only a couple. Tomorrow we can get more to eat before we reach the Isle."

She glanced at the pear, then back at the imp before promptly ruffling his head-since he had no hair to speak of-and offering him a smile. "Thanks, Jaken, but I'm not hungry. You keep it."

He batted her hand away and straightened the hat she'd knocked askew. "Don't be ridiculous; you haven't had anything to eat all day. Take it."

She blinked. "I haven't?"

Jaken stared at her. "Unless you found food while off with Sesshomaru-sama, no, you haven't. I noticed. How could you not?"

She shrugged. "I haven't had much of an appetite lately. I don't feel any worse for wear. Seriously, you can have the pear."

For a moment, he held the bit of fruit in both hands and stared at it, before he shook his head. "I'll save it until morning."

Yes, morning. Everything would be better tomorrow. Lucidity sighed as Jaken stowed his one small ration away. Drawing her legs up, she rested her elbows on her knees and massaged her temple. Honestly, how had things gone so wrong so quickly? She could scarce believe that only a handful of hours ago she was laughing above a canyon, beyond happy in that one brief moment. And then later, with Sesshomaru.... She closed her eyes, a hand coming to her neck and gripping tight. He couldn't be ashamed of her, right? He couldn't do all that and wish that she was anything but what she was? But then why would he even say such a thing? She didn't know. She was burning to ask, but didn't dare.

"So tomorrow we reach the Isle."

Jaken's voice was so close that it startled Lucidity, who opened her eyes and spotted him sitting next to her, arms and legs folded and Staff held against his chest.

"Looks that way," she said.

"I wonder if the Four Sisters will truly be there. What answers they might they have for us, do you think?"

"An answer for every question, hopefully."

"Hmm...." Jaken tilted his head back, the stars reflected in his large eyes. "I look forward to when this is over; I prefer to travel the countryside in relative peace with my lord." His gaze shifted onto Lucidity. "I suppose you will be with us from now on, but you are tolerable enough."

She snorted softly and peered up at the sky. "Thanks, I'm flattered."

"You should be," said Jaken with a huff. "No woman has ever caught his attention as you have. Perhaps one, but she was killed several years ago. I don't know if I could have endured her company. She would have lived much longer than you will. Speaking of which, I wonder what will be done when you become too old to travel. No village will take in a gaijin for a good long while, it seems. I'm sure Sesshomaru-sama will make some arrangement. Maybe-" 

"Hey...Jaken," Lucidity muttered, pinching the bridge of her nose in a prayer for patience. "Do me a favor and shut the fuck up."

"What?! How dare you speak to me that way!"

"Then spare yourself the insults and stop talking to me right now!" she snapped, glaring at him. "I mean it, Jaken. Leave me alone."

"Fine! I refuse to speak with such a disrespectful woman, anyhow!" he shouted as he jumped up and marched to the other side of the fire to sit.

Yeah. Disrespectful. That was her all right. Lucidity pushed herself to her feet, heart pounding slightly in her chest as she headed off. Jaken may have told her more than she cared to know; she had no desire to learn about some other woman. And he might have mentioned a very good concern about what she would do when the whole mortality thing caught up with her. But his musings had brought a memory to the forefront of her mind and she suddenly couldn't wait until morning.

"Sesshomaru?" she said, tentative, as she approached the daiyoukai. He didn't acknowledge her or turn around and she came to a stop a couple steps behind him, just off to the side so she could see the line of his face, utterly impassive as it was. "I'm...uh...I just wanted to speak with you real quick. I...." Shit! Maybe she should have waited until she at least had a better idea of what to say. 

"I see that Jaken has reminded you of what you risk losing should I no longer favor you," Sesshomaru said, his gaze still on the horizon.

"You...heard all that?" When there was no response, Lucidity swallowed slightly, putting it down to obvious youkai hearing, and continued. "He actually reminded me of what you said, about not wanting me from your side, everything it implied and.... I honestly don't know by what you meant earlier, but I was wrong. I shouldn't have accused you of being ashamed, of any of that. Those are...those are my insecurities and...I'm sorry, Sesshomaru, I really am." Again, no response, not even a flicker of gold in her direction. She stood there for a long moment, nervous and uncertain, before eventually taking a step back. "I...just wanted you to know that." And when nothing but silence greeted her words once more, she turned and began walking back to the campfire.

"I doubt the sincerity of your words, Lucidity."

She froze.

"Yet I will think on the matter. Do not approach me again; I will speak with you when I see fit. And know that I will not abide another insult to my person as you have done today; never show me such disrespect again."

Lucidity was shaking by the time she sank down in front of the fire. Part of her questioned if she should or should not be furious. It wasn't as if he didn't disrespect her on occasion, didn't give her orders and expect her to obey like some servant. And yet she couldn't help but wonder just how deeply she had really insulted him, if she had caused some irreparable damage. She must have. What he meant, there was no mistaking it, and she felt little beyond this despairing fear that suddenly crippled her more than any physical injury she had ever suffered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaawww. Things were almost perfect! Steamy and perfect hehe. What do you guys think? Does it need an explicit rating? I'm not sure. I go back and forth. Will there be future scenes like this? I'm quite certain of it XD 
> 
> Also, I do wonder how fair Sesshy is being...and if Lucidity needs to get her backbone back in place? I can definitely see both sides, but that's what happens when one is the writer. Anyone care to share his/her outside perspective?


	25. Chapter 25

Morning came. And the morning was shit. Tomorrow, or today rather, would definitely not be better. Lucidity managed to get some sleep, wrapped in nothing but her coat with the hood up. Yet the night had more or less been spent waking, rolling over, falling back asleep, waking again, finding a new position, then drifting off once more, rinse repeat until she finally abandoned all pretense in the early predawn light and sat in silence until Jaken and Ah-Un stirred. And what was the first thing to happen when Jaken saw her awake? He gave her the goddamn pear again. Lucidity stared at the blasted piece of fruit, then over at the imp, who muttered something about needing to keep up her strength. She seriously could have chucked it at his head then and there; the last thing she needed was to feel terrible over yet another development. Once again, she tried to return the pear, but Jaken refused, going so far as to simply walk off to join his master before she could protest further.

Lucidity ate the stupid thing for no other reason than knowing it was necessary. She still wasn't hungry, nor suffering any ill effects from lack of food. She was able to maintain a comfortable pace with the group once they set off, choosing to walk next to the lumbering Ah-Un while Jaken strolled along with Sesshomaru. Apparently he was happy to take advantage of their little spat, keeping up a more or less steady flow of dialogue, regardless if anyone answered him or not. Jaken speculated about the Isle, of whether or not the Sisters would really be there to allow them passage, if it was not a wild goose chase Kaidame had put them up to, whether or not they would be able to hunt down the remaining members of the Viper Clan. Lucidity listened with half an ear. The rest of her attention was focused inward, on her own dilemmas, whether of a personal and intimate nature or a broader spectrum of the entity, rising power, and so on. Months it had been. Almost a year. Was she finally going to discover the root of everything in a matter of hours? She studied the scar on her palm, tracing the outline of the star. She couldn't help but wonder, however, what those answers were worth now.

The hours went by slowly, with nothing of much interest happening. This part of the countryside Lucidity had come to realize was void of human habitations. The further they traveled, the less signs of people could be found. Not even a road to lead the way to a village. No signs of battle, whether old or fresh, despite this being the Warring States period. It was nothing but vast wilderness for miles beyond miles. One tree became another. One river looked the same as the next. Even the youkai began to resemble each other, whether in appearance or aura alone. With the landscape starting to blend together and an increasing disinterest that was bordering on despondency, Lucidity clambered onto Ah-Un so that he might carry her, as she did not quite trust herself to continue on her own volition, when all she wanted to do was turn around, sort of desperately.

"Lucidity," Jaken called and she looked over at the imp, who was pointing somewhere over her shoulder. "Would you get those apples for us?" 

A glance revealed a grove of trees at the base of a small hill, each one bearing some remnants of the red fruit in various stages of ripeness or decay and the ground below was littered with rotted pieces. As she directed Ah-Un with a gentle tug of the reins towards the trees, she realized that only a handful were salvageable. Was it really so late in the season? She brought Ah-Un to a stop, the heads tossing, and rose to her feet on top of the saddle to reach up for the apples on the higher branches. 

"Down here!"

Looking around, she spotted Jaken standing beside the dragon, holding out his hands, and Staff on the grass beside him. Without a word, she tossed him one, two, three, four apples altogether, then lowered herself back down.

"What are you doing? We need more," Jaken said. 

"I don't want any. That's enough for you, isn't it?" she replied.

Jaken started to respond, but fell silent when Sesshomaru suddenly approached them. For the first time since yesterday afternoon, he was looking directly at Lucidity, who sat still and quiet on Ah-Un, her grip tightening slightly on the reins. She held his gaze in spite of the pulse jumping in her throat, but he said and did nothing for so long that she became caught somewhere between anxiety and annoyance, wanting it over with and yet afraid of the outcome. Even Jaken remained silent, not budging a muscle until Sesshomaru turned and began walking away without so much as a hint of explanation. 

"Come with me, Lucidity," he ordered.

She hesitated, briefly, and shared a quick glance with Jaken, who could offer no more than a shake of his head, before she slid off of Ah-Un and followed after the daiyoukai. He led her beyond the grove of trees to the other side of the hill, until the ground leveled out and he stopped. So did she, some yards back, anxious and frustrated and hardly able to recognize herself. That he could have her so utterly defeated by words alone, held in place by the last true fear she'd come grips with last night. Fists clenched at her sides, nails biting into the palms of her hands, as she swallowed and took a breath in an effort to harden her resolve. If...if it did go wrong, if she lost.... She couldn't imagine herself begging. Just existing in some type of limbo where she was unwilling to die but struggling to find something to live for. Gods, that she would rely so heavily on another to save her from such a fate! She couldn't stand the thought.

"Are you ill?" 

Sesshomaru's question brought her up short. She stared at the line of his back and shook her head. "No." 

"Then why do you not eat?" 

Was he worried or did he believe she was attempting some ploy for sympathy? It was difficult to figure out, with the utter neutrality of his tone. "It's been days since I've felt hungry," she said. "Not since the entity did whatever it did." 

"I see," was his response, then nothing.

Silence fell and she didn't know how to break it, or if she should. And even if she did, she had no idea what to say. She pulled her hood tighter around her face as wind gusted around them, feeling a chill even with the coat on, and folded her arms. Her gaze lingered on Sesshomaru for a long moment, before she looked beyond him, at the stretch of plains that spread out before them, as far as the eye could see. Trees were spotted here and there along the land as wind swept across the grass, creating the illusion of waves and a sense of tranquility. She turned her face into the fur of the hood as another gust buffeted her and nearly jumped when Sesshomaru spoke. 

"You would have me believe your apology of last night," he was saying. "Yet I continue to question your honesty when you face to lose the security and protection that my presence offers." 

Her arms tightened against her chest and she had to take a deep breath around the sudden pounding of her heart. She found herself more than a little irritated that he did not believe her, but then wondered if she would not consider the same issue, if she'd been in his shoes. And when she noticed his head turning to peer back at her, she had trouble meeting his gaze. 

"You have nothing to say in your defense?" he asked. 

She shook her head again. "Even if I swore to hell and back that I was telling the truth, I don't think you'd believe me. Honestly, what else would you have me say?" 

He turned to face her fully. "I would have you explain your lack of trust." 

Though she wanted to do little more than hunch her shoulders and move away, she forced herself to straighten, arms still folded, the muscles of her body taut. "I do trust you...." 

"Your actions speak to the contrary." 

"I didn't mean.... I did say these were my insecurities, didn't I? I just...I reacted badly, all right?" 

His eyes narrowed. "Do not lie." 

"I'm not lying!" she shouted with a surge of anger. "I'm used to this sort of thing, of people who I thought cared suddenly turning me away. Hell, my own mother doesn't want me! How is it a stretch to believe otherwise when I hear something like 'would that you'd been born youkai?' I didn't mean to insult you. I just-Gods be damned!" With the threatening burn in her eyes, she turned from the daiyoukai, feeling like little more than a petulant child not getting her way, and swept her hands through her hair, pulling hard at the thick strands.

"Then you are a fool." 

She grunted, not trusting herself to speak, and tried to simply breathe through the constriction in her throat as she pressed the heel of her hand to a watering eye. Son of a bitch! How could she let herself become such a mess?! This wasn't her. She didn't get worked up so easily, over nothing. And this...this really wasn't nothing, then, was it? If she could actually cry over Sesshomaru, right bastard though he could be sometimes, what did that mean? Fuck! She didn't want to think about it, not now. 

When she felt a hand on her shoulder, she really did jump and almost fought his grip as he turned her around. He caught her chin before she could move away and forced her head back. The cold wind brought the wet tracks on her cheeks into sharp relief as she stared up into his placid face, her breathing too heavy, too loud in her ears until she realized her lips were parted and quickly closed them. 

"Trust me at my word, Lucidity," Sesshomaru said. "I misspoke." 

She could only nod, biting down on her lip, as a few more tears escaped, much to her frustration. His brow furrowed and he leaned down, turning her face slightly aside, and the next thing she felt was the caress of a tongue tracing another wet trail over her cheek, up to the corner of her eye. Yesterday when he had done the same to the cut, she hadn't given it much thought; it seemed the natural thing to do, with his being an inu and all. And now it eased her, let the tension drain from her body and she was able to breathe again. 

"You believe me?" she asked.

He didn't answer, but brought his tongue up the other side of her face to lick away the last of the tears. 

She wiped at the trail of saliva with her sleeve and drew back to look at him. "Does this mean you forgive me?" 

He snorted softly. "Insufferable woman." Without warning, he seized both her wrists and dragged her towards him until there was hardly an inch of space between them. "Have you any idea what you do to me?" 

She couldn't help the automatic glance downward. 

"Do not be so crude," came the immediate reprimand and she managed a small grin, moments before Sesshomaru's mouth covered hers. Her arms were trapped between them, but he didn't seem to care as he transferred her wrists to one hand, while his other came to rest on the back of her neck, holding her in place as if he expected her to pull away any second. Yet that was far, far from her intentions. She yielded to him, so utterly that she felt a sense of embarrassment at how easy it was for him to break her, but it wasn't enough to make her stop. Her eyes fell shut and her lips parted and she soon tasted the salt water that lingered on his tongue. Yet when she moaned, however faint the sound was, he went still, and then the pressure of his mouth disappeared. Only for a moment before she surged forward and kissed him again, refusing to let him go so easily. She heard the soft trickle of a growl, but she merely pushed her tongue between his lips, moaning once more, and he relented with nary a fight. His hand released her wrists in favor of wrapping around her waist and bringing her closer, while her arms found purchase about his neck. Whatever he said otherwise, she knew exactly what she did to him. She pressed herself against him, all other thoughts and concerns falling away, as the wind roared around them.

And with it came the crashing power that shattered the embrace. 

Lucidity gasped, swallowing down the cry that threatened to burst free, and felt the arm around her tighten as Sesshomaru unsheathed Bakusaiga. Jaken and Ah-Un appeared at the top of the hill, both looking around at the torrent of air that whipped about, carry dead leaves and currents of energy that had Lucidity's skin crawling worse than any barrier could ever do. Her gaze darted here and there, but she could see nothing. The wind was starting to sting, blowing so hard she could hear the trees creaking, the sound of wood snapping, and Jaken gave an unexpected shout as a severed branch struck him, sending him tumbling down the hill until he came to a stop at Sesshomaru's feet. 

"Out of time," came the soft caress a voice, as bodiless as the air it came from.

Laughter followed, high and ringing, echoing around them and the wind unexpectedly receded, contracting into a form. As though a curtain was being lifted, a pair of bare feet were revealed, followed by a billowing kimono that was too thin, and then the arms, legs, and face of a woman, so pale, like bleached bone, as was the hair that floated around her, save for the faintest trace of gold in the strands. She drifted to the ground and as her feet made no sound as she moved across the grass. Her eyes, a solid yellow as brilliant as the sun with no pupils, roamed over Sesshomaru and Lucidity, down to the imp, and finally up to Ah-Un.

"My, my," said the woman, stopping before them. "What an odd assortment you have brought with you, my Lady." Those bright eyes came to rest on Lucidity. "My Lady, my Lady Out of Time." She bowed low, one foot pointed forward, her arm stretching out a proffered hand before she straightened to her full height, which honestly was not that impressive; she couldn't have been more than five foot at most. But Lucidity found herself gawking nonetheless, at a complete loss for words.

"'My Lady?'" exclaimed Jaken, having picked up his Staff and clambered to his feet. "Show some respect! It's Sesshomaru-sama you should be addressing!"

The woman stared at the imp, head cocked to the side and mouth forming a small O of interest. "Se-ssho-ma-ru," she repeated, pronouncing each syllable with great care, then flicked her gaze to the daiyoukai. She let out a soft gasp and took several quick steps forward.

Sesshomaru, who'd been keeping Bakusaiga at his side, now moved the weapon between them and the woman, point down, a mute warning to come no further. And yet she didn't seem to care that there was any sort of danger in the vicinity.

"Ah, I did not notice before; I was too focused on my Lady at your side," the woman said, and Lucidity felt the minute shift in Sesshomaru's stance, though there was no change in his stoic expression. "Yes, but you are his. It is unmistakable. She whispered to us that he was important and here you are, son of the great dog."

Jaken was practically hopping up and down in fury. "How dare you! That's Inu no Taisho to you! Who do you think you are?"

The woman smiled, amused and unperturbed. "I am called Kuki, leader of the Four Sisters, the one who gave the order to spare his father's life."

Jaken froze in place, becoming a very life-like statue with his Staff held aloft and mouth open mid-shout.

Kuki smiled again, the expression warm and directed at Lucidity, who moved uneasily against Sesshomaru. "My Lady, we have waited so long for you."

"Why do you...why do you keep calling me that?" asked Lucidity, finally finding her voice. 

Kuki blinked. "Why, because that is what you are. You are my Lady and you are out of time." 

Lucidity shook her head. It was like speaking to Kaidame all over again. And she well remembered what he had said, what he'd called her. What else had the damn Seer hinted at that had gone over her head? 

"You do not believe me?" Kuki asked as she began to approach them once more, closing in the last few yards. 

Suddenly, Lucidity was being eased backward as Sesshomaru placed himself in front of her. Jaken moved out of the way as well, clutching his Staff in both hands and sweat breaking out beneath his hat. Ah-Un still stood at the top of the hill, both heads transfixed on what was taking place below. 

"What are you doing, Sesshomaru?" came Kuki's voice, so friendly that it wasn't difficult to believe she was merely exchanging pleasantries. "I understand that you have been declared her protector, but you cannot hope to win against me should I indulge in your suicidal behavior. As it is, I only wished to point out to my Lady that her mortal body has been pushed to its limits by the Mother and her abilities enhance for what lay in store; there is no mistaking who she is." 

The Mother? Lucidity thought. Was that...the entity? She swallowed and felt a distinctive ringing in her ears, refusing to believe anything she was hearing.  

"I grow tired of your riddles," Sesshomaru was saying. "Speak plainly." 

"I do not answer to you, pup," Kuki laughed. "And do relax your sword until you actually have need of it. A weapon deters one from having a civilized conversation and I have no reason to fight you as of this moment. Remember that we allowed your father to live because the Mother so obviously desired for you to be born. Why would we undo that now?" 

"You insolent wench!" Jaken yelled, apparently unable to hold his tongue with his master being so thoroughly mocked. "You'd best learn to speak to Sesshomaru-sama with respect or-" 

"Silence, Jaken," said the daiyoukai, who-baffling though it was-did just as Kuki asked and lowered Bakusaiga to his side. 

"What-what are you doing, my lord?" 

Sesshomaru ignored him, his attention on Kuki. "If you do not intend to fight, what is it that you want?" 

"You have already brought us what we want, what you so carefully try to guard from my sight." There was movement and Kuki came into view just beyond Sesshomaru, her smile serene and inviting. "Might I speak with you, my Lady, without having my heels nipped at?" 

Jaken bristled, but remained silent as Sesshomaru allowed Kuki to walk around him for an obstructed view, but keeping vigil all the same. Lucidity glanced over at him, but his gaze remained focused on the potential threat before them, Bakusaiga still clutched in his hand. 

"My, but you are lovely," sighed Kuki and Lucidity frowned. "And not so easily flattered, I see," she added with another laugh. "The trials you have been through just to be here have made you anything but lighthearted. Mmm, though, I can see the reason you took your protector as a lover, if not for physical need, then for solace. Yet I have trouble fathoming why you would lower yourself to seek his forgiveness." 

Lucidity's irritation was immediate. "Is there a point you're trying to make?" she demanded.

Kuki shook her head. "An observation. I find it surprising. You are jaded, my Lady. Perhaps I would go so far as to say you are broken; I did not think it possible for you to become so attached to another." 

"How would you-This isn't why we came here!" Lucidity snapped. 

"No, no I suppose not," Kuki replied, her amusement fading into an unhappy frown. "You came for answers and you shall have them. O, but how cruel the Mother can be!" 

"Blast you, woman!" shouted Jaken. "Who is this mother you keep speaking of? Direct us to her so we no longer have to deal with the likes of you!" 

"That is not possible," said Kuki. 

The imp waved his Staff. "You lie!" 

"Ask my Lady. She knows of whom I speak and will tell you no different."

Lucidity felt a touch of heat in her cheeks, along with the eyes of both Sesshomaru and Jaken on her. She glanced up at the former, whose gaze was unwavering, a hint of a frown on his lips. "The Mother Goddess," she muttered, digging a heel into the earth. 

"Of the oldest worlds, of the oldest magics!" Kuki proclaimed, a lilt of laughter in her voice. "She has many names, but will always be Mother to us." 

Swallowing, Lucidity looked away from the flicker of comprehension in those golden eyes and peered at her scarred palm instead. Kuki began to clap. 

"I see, I see," she said. "Of the four and above, below, and within. That is where She marked you both, where your skin first touched. The Mother's symbol, one of many, and yet Hers regardless. You are, you truly are here, my Lady, my newborn mother, with your Protector. Ah, but you are out of time." 

Lucidity jerked her head up, her stomach clenching, as an abrupt understanding struck her. "Out of time? Why do you keep saying that?" When Kuki merely gazed at her in a silence that was rapidly growing solemn, she stepped closer to Sesshomaru, who responded to her tension by lifting Bakusaiga once more. 

Kuki closed her eyes with a heavy sigh. "Ah, but the Mother is cruel. So many trials. And we are of the last." Then, throwing her head back, she let out a shout, saying one word: "Kasai!" 

Fire erupted above them, searing the air, and Lucidity suddenly felt Sesshomaru's arm around her once more before he leapt backwards, putting them at a much more comfortable distance from Kuki and a second woman who drifted overhead, identical in every feature and article of clothing save for the crimson eyes and hair. Jaken sprinted after his master, crying out not to be left behind, as Kuki and Kasai looked at one another, their voices loud enough to carry.

"Is it time already?" Kasai asked. "Where are Mizu and Chikyu?" 

"They have their orders," said Kuki. "How I wish this was not necessary." 

"This is the way it must be, sister," said Kasai. "The pup, then, is mine?" 

"Is...this where we make our peace with death?" Lucidity muttered as Kuki nodded. 

"This is where you run," Sesshomaru said, his gaze fixed on the Sisters. "You and Jaken take Ah-Un and go." 

"But-" 

"You are in the way. Go!" 

Before she could so much as blink, the daiyoukai shoved her hard enough that she found herself on the ground. And then he was gone from her side. Up ahead, she saw him bring Bakusaiga down on the two Sisters, who disappeared in a flurry of wind and flames, right as she felt a tug on her arm and looked over at Jaken. 

"We need to get out of here. Come on!" he shouted.  

Lucidity scrambled onto her feet, a hand automatically checking the sword at her side, though she made no move to draw it. In just the short while it took her to stand, Sesshomaru had moved further away. Or, it seemed he was being driven. Kasai had materialized again, with what appeared to be whips of fire in either hand, striking at Sesshomaru so rapidly that he could do little more than parry and dart out of their reach. Each step drove him back. Lucidity looked around, but could neither see nor feel any sign of Kuki. And Jaken was yanking on her arm, shouting at her to move, and Ah-Un was tearing down the hill, apparently aware that he was needed. Lucidity had no choice but to sprint for the dragon, Jaken at her heels. If she could grab the imp, it wouldn't be much of a feat to take a running leap onto-

A hard blow to her stomach by an unseen force sent her flying backwards and she found herself laying face down on the grass, gasping for breath. A sharp cry and heavy thump beside her suggested that Jaken had suffered a similar fate fate. With a grunt, she pushed herself up and spotted Kuki standing before Ah-Un, having a heavy chain of energy wrapped around the two necks. The heads shook and strained as the dragon was lifted into the air, Kuki leading him as if he was nothing more than a mutt refusing to be trained. She jerked hard and pulled Ah-Un higher.

"W-what are they doing?" Jaken stammered.

Lucidity staggered to her feet and watched Ah-Un struggling, then over to Sesshomaru in the distance, still meeting Kasai blow-for-blow. Both were being urged in opposite directions, leaving her and Jaken vulnerable. And what had Kuki meant that others had been given orders? The last two Sisters, where were they? Her heart thudded inside her chest long before she heard the rumbling beneath the ground, before Jaken began to cry out, and she was the one shouting to run. But as Jaken bolted out ahead of her, the earth churned beneath her feet, barely missing the damn imp, who was none the wiser when she lost her balance and fell hard, nearly getting a mouthful of dirt. Grunting, she started to get up, but another tremor made that nigh impossible and she soon found herself on her knees. Jaken, little bugger though he was, had gained significant distance on her, never having realized that he was very much on his own, even as the ground started to split before him.

No, he didn't notice until it disappeared beneath his feet and he let out a shriek, dropping the Staff in an attempt to cling at the edge of the unexpected crevice he suddenly found himself at the mercy of. Lucidity was on her feet, trying to run, but it was like being trapped in a terrible nightmare. She couldn't find her footing in the wake of the earthquake that had seized the land. Jaken was screaming. She could hear him above the echoing tremors as the crevice widened, with his clutching on for dear life. He was calling for help. And despite how she struggled, she wasn't able to reach him. One, two, three steps and she lost her balance and had to scramble forward onto hands and knees before she managed to rise again. Over and over, with the constant rumbling of the earthquake in her ears, the roar of the wind, the surging of the water.

Her heart dropped into her stomach just as she fell once more. The crevice was no longer a crevice, but a raging torrent of a river with Jaken dangling above what could only be certain death. Lucidity stumbled, again getting her feet beneath her, and ran. So close! She was so damn close! Jaken was shouting. She could hear her name, his hand stretching out, as the ground gave way around him and he plunged out of sight. She collapsed to her knees at the edge of the flood, just in time to see his head go under before it came back up, his arms flailing about him. He was still crying out, the water churning around him, carrying him away, knocking him into the high walls of earth where he managed to catch hold. Gods! The very hill had been split apart! The trees were swaying above, hanging on by mere roots. And Jaken...Jaken had already been brought back once by Tenseiga.

But Lucidity knew. She remembered now, what the entity...what the Mother had shown her. And the choice was hers. She didn't want to. Gods, did she not want to! But when she heard Jaken's fresh scream and saw the water rushing over his head, threatening to break his grip, she didn't think. She jumped.

Water flooded her ears and nose and mouth before she broke the surface and let the current take her. She coughed, pushing the hair from her eyes, looking around wildly until she caught sight of a spot of green against the crumbling wall. Kicking off towards Jaken, she remembered why she hated swimming, why she hated water so much, the heavy weight of it, the lack of control, and how utterly exhausted it left her. Yet she was stronger, faster. As much as she loathed being manipulated, she was thankful in this moment that she was able to reach Jaken and managed to find a grip on the wall near him.

"Are you crazy?!" were his first grateful words. "We'll both drown now!"

"Shut up and get on my back, you damn Yoda freak!" she yelled.

"What on earth is a Yoda?!" he snapped, and yet did as she ordered.

The moment she felt the weight of his arms around her neck, she let go. Jaken's cry of alarm rang in her ears. Just as before, she had the current carry them, not bothering to fight it, even as they were tossed around. Now and then they struck a wall, with Lucidity turning, taking the brunt of the blow, her legs or arms absorbing any impact. She remembered both fighting and fleeing the winged youkai, how long she'd been able to hold out, how fast, how far she'd been able to push herself and decided that Sesshomaru might be a decent enough teacher after all. She knew her limits as they were now and managed to get herself and Jaken through the hill with only a few bumps and scrapes to show for it. Yet the water had not slowed and she could see no end to this river that had cut a path through the earth. But the walls were not as high on this side of the hill. If she could reach one before she became too exhausted-

"Lucidity! Lucidity!" Jaken was screaming right in her ear again, pulling on the coat in a fresh wave of panic.

"What-"

"The trees! You must move faster! The trees are falling in!"

Lucidity jerked her head around and, sure enough, saw the roots of two trees snap under the weight of their loads. Branches and splinters of wood broke off as the trees, with trunks as thick as her body, began to slide down the opening in the hill towards the water below, only to become stuck halfway. Yet even as she watched, she could see that they wouldn't be for long, sliding down inch by inch. Jaken beat on the back of her shoulders, but she was already moving and would be saving a reprimanding smack for later if she didn't decide to drop him in the water right this second; completely defeated the purpose of bothering to rescue him. She cut as quickly through the water as she could, one arm after another stretching forward, expecting any moment to be crushed under the weight of an unforgiving apple tree. A brief glance up revealed a low bank and she turned in its direction, not stopping until her fingers touched solid earth and dug in deep. She brought herself flush against the wall and reached up, gripping onto whatever she could in its cragged surface, and hauled herself up. Just a few feet. That was all she needed.

A scraping, echoing noise filled her ears, followed by a heavy splash, and she didn't need to hear Jaken's shout for her to move faster.

"Climb!" she commanded. "Get on my shoulders and climb, you idiot! Come on, move!"

Jaken went, scrambling up and over her head and was able to grab onto the edge of the bank above them and pull himself to safety. Lucidity followed, very much aware of the resonating clatter behind her, the crack of wood against wood, the crashing of it against the earth, coming closer. Again she reached up and felt grass beneath her hand, Jaken's fingers closing around her wrist, trying to help her. 

Pain exploded through her back and chest as the trees clipped her, slammed up against one another, and knocked the air from her lungs and her body into the hard, unforgiving earth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops! Another cliffhanger XD And dammit, Lucidity, where's that backbone?! Eh...probably broken now. Have to wait and see! 
> 
> Also, not a huge Star Wars fan, but I couldn't help but picture Luke carrying Yoda when I wrote this. It was just too perfect!


	26. Chapter 26

The unprecedented decision for the Sisters to attack did not require understanding. There was only the need to react accordingly, regardless if the hope for victory was strained at best. Sesshomaru was not ignorant of the strength the Sisters wielded, but doubt had no place in battle. He was aware of what Kasai and her whips were doing, how she was not so much engaging in fierce combat, but rather entertaining an opponent she considered little more than a nuisance. She danced through the fight as though she found it a bothersome chore, striking at him and Bakusaiga alike with nothing more than a cursory glance at his efforts. And when he sent a blast of power her way, the same power that had eradicated a thousand youkai in a single swing, she disappeared in a shower of sparks before she was struck, only to materialize before him seconds later, her smile mocking and her fist impacting hard across his face.

Doubt, indeed, had no place in battle and the daiyoukai refused to remain down for long, refused to succumb to the volley of attacks that forced him further and further from his charges. He was not an idiot. He knew the Sisters were separating them, though the reason itself eluded him. He'd seen Kuki with Ah-Un, felt the ground shake beneath his feet, and beheld the river that split the land like a wound. And he saw Jaken and Lucidity disappear into that river, one after the other. He could do nothing to stop it. Kasai could not be overcome. She matched him for speed, for strength, and perhaps power as well. Only one Sister and he struggled to break free of the stalemate he found himself trapped in. And just as he was preparing to cast aside Bakusaiga, to gather his energy and release his true form, she spun away and rose into the air. 

"Beloved pup," she murmured, speaking in hardly more than a sigh. "Go to your mistress." 

With the Seer's words echoing in his ears, he watched the flames swallow Kasai's form and dissipate into nothing. He could no more understand this withdraw from battle anymore than the reason it had started. Yet he did not have the luxury of taking the time to contemplate the matter. His path was unobstructed as he searched out Jaken and Lucidity. The aura of the Sisters lingered in the air, but he could find no sign of them as he ran the length of the river. There was only the woman and imp, wet and panting with exertion, but safely on the bank and Ah-Un in their midst. Sesshomaru sheathed Bakusaiga as he slowed and walked up the group, scenting faint traces of blood and nothing more. 

"My lord, there you are!" Jaken cried, running over to him. "The reputation of the Sisters must be greatly embellished for you to be standing here. Not that I expected you to lose!" he quickly added. "Only that I didn't expect the fight to be over so soon. That is, I mean-obviously they are far weaker than the stories claim, as you vanquished them so easily." 

"I did not," said Sesshomaru, peering around, unsettled by the utter silence that had fallen. Even the river had quieted, becoming nothing more than a tranquil stream. 

"You mean they live?" Jaken asked. 

"They retreated under their own volition." 

"But why?! What reason did they have to attack in the first place?" the imp shouted as he stomped his foot. "We were nearly crushed to death by those crazy harpies!" 

"Speak for yourself," muttered Lucidity, who was leaning back against Ah-Un.

Abandoning his examination of the area, Sesshomaru turned his full attention onto her with Kasai's words ringing in his head. "What happened?" he asked, but she simply shook her head at the question, eyes closed, trying to catch her breath. 

"Nothing that she wasn't able to walk away from obviously," Jaken dismissed. "My lord, have you seen the Staff? I dropped it right before we went in the water. My lord? What are you doing?"

Sesshomaru ignored his servant as he approached Lucidity. She had made an odd gesture by lifting her hand in Jaken's direction with a single finger presented, but it was the way her forehead knotted and her teeth gritted that he took note of. Her eyes opened as he came to stand in front of her, breathing still ragged. Something churned and settled in the pit of his stomach as he gazed down at her. "Lucidity? What is-"

Her eyes flew wide before he was able to finish his sentence and she broke into a deep, choking cough that had her suddenly doubled over. Her nails scraped along his armor as she scrambled to grab hold of him. He caught her by the shoulders and felt the fine tremors in her body, heard the breathing that was growing rougher, more labored, and lowered them to their knees. Ah-Un shifted as Jaken rushed forward, in time to witness Lucidity cough up a spray of blood that decorated the grass and the white hakama of the daiyoukai. The hands on her shoulders clenched briefly before Sesshomaru laid her down. As Jaken stood on her other side, doing little more than staring with his mouth ajar, Sesshomaru made quick work of those wooden clasps with his claws and pulled her first layer of clothing apart, then lifted the second layer out of the way to reveal the bare skin beneath.

Skin that was heavily bruised. The discoloration started from her chest, stretching towards her back, and spread out to her stomach. He drew the clothing higher-while Jaken turned his back to them-and began to inspect the damage. Fingers moved over the bruising around the ribs and he felt the broken bone beneath, then shifted his hand down to her stomach. Even as he knelt there, coming to realize the full extent of the injuries, the deepening color in her abdomen was not lost under his sharp gaze. 

Sesshomaru eased the clothing down and noticed Lucidity watching him, her breathing ever rapid and short, and yet it wasn't hopeful fear he saw in her pallid face. "The wounds are fatal," he said, and her eyes fell shut as she turned her head to the side, pain flashing across her features.

"How is that possible?!" Jaken exclaimed upon turning around. "She's been fine! Walking and talking and-" 

"She has been made stronger than most humans," said Sesshomaru, little more than an afterthought, as he watched the steady movement of her chest. But still only human.

Jaken appeared to be struggling with some deep, inner turmoil before he finally blurted out, "You stupid woman! You never should have jumped in! What were you thinking?!" 

"I'm thinking...what you mean is 'Thank you, Lucidity,'" she muttered. 

"I know very well what I meant! You imbecile! You...." For once, words seemed to fail the imp as he stood there, glaring down at Lucidity, who, for some unimaginable reason, decided to push herself up. 

Sesshomaru put a hand on her shoulder to ease her back down. "You shouldn't move." 

She snorted. "Does it matter?"

Jaken stepped closer, as if he, too, intended to keep Lucidity on the ground. "Don't make it worse." 

"Worse?!" Lucidity echoed. "How could I possibly make it worse? I'm already walking corpse, aren't I?" 

Sesshomaru's claws clicked together as his fingers twitched. "Do not make light of this merely because you believe Tenseiga will save you," he said.

"You think I take this lightly?!" she shouted and immediately succumbed to another spasm of coughing. She rolled away, propping herself onto an elbow, her entire frame wracked with the wet, hacking sounds that brought about the scent of more blood. The hand she wiped her mouth with became smeared with crimson and she still deemed it appropriate to sit up. 

More than displeased, Sesshomaru settled himself behind her, wrapped an arm across her upper chest, and drew her back against him. "You must stop moving," he murmured, but discovered there was no point. She had no fight left in her as her head came to lay on the mokomoko, her shoulders heaving with every breath she took, and the scent of salt water reached his nose.

Jaken shifted, taking a few tentative steps towards them. "Eeto...Sesshomaru-sama, what should I...er...." He fell silent as Sesshomaru peered over at him. Not a word passed between master and servant, but Jaken gave a nod nonetheless and took Ah-Un by the reins. "I will search for the Staff, my Lord," was all he said. 

The daiyoukai watched the figures of the imp and dragon take to the air and sweep low over the land as he considered the potential danger. Yet the Sisters had not returned. He could neither smell nor feel their presence. The damage they'd intended was done. But for what purpose? Kuki had made mention of trials, that they, the Sisters, were the last trial for Lucidity. To what end? Why was her death a necessity? Sesshomaru realized that, overall, he did not care about the answer. In this moment, there was no need to understand. As he had done with Kasai, he merely reacted to this turn of events. Sliding his arm beneath Lucidity's knees, he brought her around to lay across his lap, his legs folded, and eased her into the fur of the mokomoko. His movements were automatic, with no thought behind what he was doing or the reason he considered it necessary, even as he took in the broken form he now held, her eyes closed and body languid in his grasp, the paleness in her cheeks and the red stain on her lips. 

The sigh that slipped from him was little more than a soft exhale between his lips. "Why must you be so reckless a fool?"

Her brow furrowed and she opened her eyes. "Had to," she muttered. "Jaken and...and I just had to." 

"It was you the Sisters wished to kill, not Jaken," he said. "He may have lived." 

She shook her head. "No, he wouldn't have." 

Sesshomaru frowned. "How can you be certain?" 

"The Mother...." Lucidity began. "The Mother...She...."

Suddenly, her arm, which had been against his stomach, rose and her fingers snagged on the edge of his armor. He took her hand in his without a word and felt no strength in her grip as her eyes fluttered, trying to focus. "A balance," she whispered. "Sesshomaru...." Her nails scraped his skin, but little more and he knew that she was unable to form much beyond a single coherent thought, if at all.

"That's enough," he said. "You are losing blood, inside. It will not be long." 

She grimaced and several tears spilled from the corners of her eyes and into her hair as her fingers managed to squeeze his hand, her breathing little more than a rasp. "Ten...Tenseiga?" 

He lifted her higher in the crook of his arm and her gaze, dull though it was, found his. "Do not ask stupid questions," he said. She blinked. He saw her eyes sharpen for a heartbeat and a tension seized him in that moment that he could not understand. He was well aware that she was dying. It was a truth he had accepted as soon as he discovered how gravely she was injured. There was no reason for him to react like this, for him to be swallowing around his pulse that had quickened without warning. The taste of fear was known to him and this was not it, nor was it sadness or mourning, emotions which he had unfortunately become familiar with in recent years. This was new and he did not care for it, whatever it might be, and he was left bemused and uneasy. Perhaps in an effort to silence this unwanted reaction or because he caught sight of that blue gaze growing distant and knew there was nothing more that he could do, he gathered Lucidity closer and laid his chin on top of her head, listening to his own heartbeat echo throughout his body. What a sentimental fool he was becoming. 

Her fingers twitched against his palm, nails digging into his skin so briefly, before her hand grew limp. He closed his eyes for a moment, before he lowered her back to the furs. Her chest continued to rise, though her breathing was shallow. He released her hand and touched her throat. The pulse was weak and the skin around her lips had turned blue.

He called her name and, as expected, there was no response. She was unconscious, with no chance of waking. A vague idea crossed his mind and his hand closed over her throat before he gave it much consideration, but he went no further. Did it matter? That was what she had asked. By all logical sense, it didn't. And a simple thing, the decision should be. An easy break that would put an end to this so that he might use Tenseiga. There was no reason to prolong the inevitable, and yet he did not move. The snap of bones beneath his hand was not uncommon, but he did not like the thought of Lucidity becoming one of many. She was human. It was expected that her life be passing; yet he would not take it from her. That was the reason, however absurd it was, he had told her to stop moving, so that she might live, if only for a short while longer.

She truly had twisted him into someone he no longer recognized. Earlier, she had so easily extinguished his anger with her. To his irritation, the tears had been enough. He'd found the sight and the scent distasteful, to the point where he had succumbed to one of his baser instincts. With no one else present, he was not only willing, but wanting. He'd wanted to put an end to her weeping, to forget her insult, forget what was little more than a mistake. She was not a deceitful creature, a fact he should not have questioned. Gazing down at her still form, he slid his hand from her throat to the area between her breasts, where this time yesterday he'd touched merely to savor the fluttering heartbeat he'd known he was responsible for. It was silent now and he took a breath, closing his eyes once more. This was her last chance.

The smell of embers invaded his senses and brought him out of his reverie with a slight jolt. He lifted his head, eyes narrowed, as he lowered Lucidity to the ground. With one hand on Bakusaiga, he stood, the wind kicking up around him, and felt a faint aura on the current. He turned. Nothing beyond grass and the figures of Ah-Un and Jaken could be seen. Feet spread and muscles taut, he unsheathed the sword. Yet everything was quiet around him, as if the world had righted itself, though the devastation remained. Shifting on the spot, unwilling to move unless there was reason, Sesshomaru raised Bakusaiga an inch or so higher. 

Like a trigger being pulled, a blast of power struck him. Wind lifted his hair and mokomoko, but something solid connected with his midriff and flung him backwards. For one, brief spell, he had no control as the momentum of the blow carried him until he was able to right himself, flipping midair and skidding to a stop on his feet. When he straightened, he saw Kasai standing before him, her smile ever mocking.

"Hello, puppy," she said, then pointed to the sky. "Fetch!" 

Hand clenching tighter on Bakusaiga, Sesshomaru looked up and his eyes widened as a cold shock gripped him. Kuki hovered above with Lucidity in her arms, touching her cheek as a lover would and with such a woeful expression that was out of place, before gazing down at the daiyoukai. The moment their eyes met, she let out a sigh and dissolved into a whirlwind of air, Lucidity vanishing right along with her. Sesshomaru took an involuntary step forward, a sound or word on the tip of his tongue that even he wasn't certain of, then turned his attention back to Kasai. A thread of temper began to rise through the shock. 

She stepped back, showing teeth in a broad grin. "Be a good boy now and come to the Isle if you wish to save her. Only you, of course," she added when Ah-Un landed beside Sesshomaru, bearing an irate imp, who brandished the two-headed Staff. Fire streamed from the mouth of the old man and engulfed the smirking Kasai. She was gone by the time the flames dispersed.

"Come back here, you coward!" Jaken shouted. "Return Lucidity at once!"

Disembodied laughter was the only response. Jaken jumped to the ground, cursing and yelling, but his words were little more than nonsensical sounds to Sesshomaru's ears as he sheathed Bakusaiga and walked forward. The scents on the air were strong, a throbbing light in an otherwise encompassing darkness, and beckoned him as a temptress would. He inhaled deeply and felt the rush of pure, unadulterated anger that brought his energy crackling to the surface, hair and fur billowing around him and the whites of his eyes bleeding red. Claws and fangs lengthened as he rose into the air, riding the power into his true form, just as Inu no Taisho had done centuries ago. The memory of that night invaded his mind, but did nothing to deter his pursuit of the Sisters, even as he came to the realization that he may very well suffer the same fate as his father, all for the sake of a mortal woman.

Minutes or hours, time had no meaning as he followed the trail that had been left for him. A storm mixed with embers and freshly churned soil, soaked in blood. Lucidity's blood. It was his only focus. What awaited at the end, a trap or his own death, held no importance. One Sister alone was a worthy opponent. Four Sisters would mean his demise. And still he did not stop. He finally understood what had driven his father to such lengths to rescue Izayoi, to cast aside his own life for the sake of another, for a human, no less. Humans had so little time in this world. Their deaths came so quickly, a barest flicker in the eyes of a youkai. The thought of bothering with these inferior creatures, let alone protecting one who made little difference in so short a lifespan, had never made sense, not until a certain child showed him otherwise. And yet, it wasn't until now that Sesshomaru fully comprehended the answer to his father's last words.

Nothing but open sky had been ahead of him since he had set off. Yet a fog had begun to roll in, encroaching on every side. His vision was obscured and the land below disappeared from view, but he pressed on. The aura of the Sisters was passing at best. A game though they seemed to be playing, there was no lying in wait. They wanted him on their Isle and he would ensure that naught but ash remained of their home, even if his bones were to feed the earth in the wake of his destructive force. A snarl broke from him as the fog thickened, adding to his frustration and triggering the short response this form often brought about. Whether he attempted to rise above or glide down below, there was no end to the pressing whiteness around him and his jaws snapped at empty air.

And then sunlight filled his vision as he burst through a fog that was simply no longer there. Far below, he saw the Isle, surrounded by clear blue ocean and wholly unimpressive to the daiyoukai, who had heard too many whispers of this mysterious and dangerous dwelling. A single glance told him that even a human could traverse the entire length of the land in less than a day. Most of the surface was covered in forest, a high mountain at the center, and remnants of a village at its base. On the other side of the mountain, however, was a peculiar sight. A palace was the only word that came to mind, though it was unlike any he had ever seen. The entirety of it was constructed of gleaming, white stone. Sunlight glinted off a large dome that made up the front of the structure, while the rest of the roof lay flat, stretching out behind the dome for a short distance before splitting into separate sections. And between the two sections was a tree, so enormous that it cast a shadow even across the highest point of the palace.

Perhaps a magnificent sight this place might have once been. To Sesshomaru, it was nothing but an obstacle standing in his way. The scents were stronger here and he descended with such speed that his paws struck the ground in a resonating impact that shattered the earth and shook the leaves from trees. Dust rose and settled, his power retracting, and it was booted feet that found the first step leading up to the entrance of the palace. Sesshomaru paused in front of the pillared doorway, knuckles cracking at his side, then peered back at the expanse of forest. Never before had he encountered such an oppressive silence. It was absolute. He could hear no scuttle of four-legged animals, no calls of birds, not even the singing of insects. The very air was stale. Nothing lived here but the vegetation. This was where they had meant to journey for answers, but he intended take what he came for and leave, rather than risk another moment in this cursed land.

A short hall lined with newly lit torches greeted him upon entrance into the palace. Little more than an annex, there was nothing grand about the interior. The few things of note were statues of small, young women that filled the niches along the walls on either side as he made his way through the hall, his footsteps echoing, to a set of double doors on the far end that had to be pushed rather than slid open. On the other side, he came out onto a dirt floor. The doors clattered shut behind him as his gaze swept across the vast, circular space, large enough to accommodate his true form twice over. The room was bathed in a natural light, the source of which he could not determine. Phases of the moon had been intricately carved along the wall, a full cycle from beginning to end. The floor was lined with a spiraling pattern of rocks and at the heart of it an altar placed upon a dais, made from the same gleaming white stone as the palace itself. And upon the altar, legs and arms carefully arranged, yellow hair finely brushed, weapons and outer garment removed, lay Lucidity.

The Sisters were not here. Their power drenched every crack and sinew, but the creatures themselves were absent. Again, he peered around, scenting the area , and found nothing of note that should keep him from simply bounding across the room. Yet he refrained and approached with measured steps, the dirt crunching beneath his boots until he reached the dais and lighted upon it. As his gaze came to rest on the sole reason he had come here, he could not help but wonder at the ultimate goal the Sisters wished to achieve. He wanted to know the purpose of bringing him here under these conditions, when coming to the Isle had been his initial intention. However, these were questions for another time, questions he may never have the answers to. There was only one matter of import here and she lay dead before him.

His hand had found the curve of her cheek and that single touch let him know she had succumbed to the injuries. Warmth lingered in her skin, but there was no breath, no life and it left a bitter taste in his mouth as his fingers closed over the hilt of Tenseiga. Stepping back, he unsheathed the sword and held it over Lucidity, waiting for the echo of power that was his alone to command.

And waited.

And waited.

Tenseiga remained silent in his hand, nothing more than cold steal. He stared at the length of the blade and the first inane thought that crossed his mind was that he must have been mistaken, that somewhere in her broken body Lucidity was still alive. And yet he knew the truth, as surely as he knew that Tenseiga was not answering him. Of all the people, of all the creatures he had revived, Tenseiga would not bring back this one woman. A hundred souls of the Underworld the sword had purified, but it would not save her. Why? Had it been the Meido Stone? Had it somehow negated Tenseiga's power when his mother had resurrected Lucidity? That could not be possible. The Sword of Heaven was created to heal, to save, to help protect the lives of humans. And now...Tenseiga...simply...refused.

The sword trembled in his grasp as a swell of fury rose inside him like a maddened beast and a guttural snarl tore from his throat.

"Useless!" he roared, flinging Tenseiga from him, and heard the blade embed itself into a far wall. The sense of betrayal from his father's fang was rivaled only by his sense of loss, as if the very air choked him with it. And his anger was met with an equal wave of helplessness that left him stricken as he placed a hand on either side of Lucidity, gripping the edges of the altar, and gazed down at her. So still, so utterly beyond his reach. There was nothing he could do. She was dead. And there was nothing he could do! The stone began to fracture and crumble beneath his fingers before he suddenly expelled the breath that had been held tight in his chest. As a quiet defeat settled over him, one that he had never known was possible, the daiyoukai closed his eyes and leaned down until his forehead touched hers.

Would that she'd been born youkai...her time would not have been so fleeting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn, Sesshy, how many stages of grief was that in one go? Also, who here is hating Kasai? She's such a bitch! And so fun to write XD


	27. Chapter 27

"Can he mourn?"

"That does appear to be what he is doing."

"Can he weep?"

"That seems less likely."

"But he grieves all the same."

Their scents had reached Sesshomaru long before their voices. Yet he paid the Sisters no more attention than he would have an insect crawling on his hand. He gave their presence some consideration at first, then chose to ignore them. Bent over the prone figure of the woman he had coveted, he felt little beyond the lingering desire to remove her from here. And after he had accomplished that....

She had once mentioned cremation as part of her father's beliefs. Sesshomaru had to assume she held the same; he'd never thought to ask. Constructing a pyre was the last thing he'd be able to do for her; he would not leave her body here to rot on this forsaken Isle.

"Now, now, what are you doing?"

It was Kuki who spoke, having come to stand next to him on the dais as he gathered Lucidity into his arms. He did not respond, not so much as a cursory glance. Never before had he so strong a detachment for his own survival, though he knew well that his death would be meaningless at this point. Nothing could be gained from it, but he did not care as he turned to face the Four Sisters. Reflections of each other, they all were, with varying degrees of differences. Next to Kasai stood the third Sister, brown of eye and green hair like the thick vines of a forest, who carried the belongings that had been stripped of Lucidity. And the fourth was in Kasai's arms, a frail thing who peered out from beneath wisps of blue hair. Chikyu and Mizu. Sesshomaru regarded them each in turn, flicking his eyes from one to the other, before he simply strode past these women who had inspired great awe and fear in centuries near forgotten.

"You know, I think he might be angry with us. Or did we break him?"

"Oh, would you shut up for once?!" replied a voice that was unfamiliar, weary and not the least bit amused.

"Yes, of course, I'll be quiet, Mizu. By all means, Sesshomaru, you are free to take her with you, if you wish her to remain a decaying corpse."

Sesshomaru stopped in front of the double doors and gazed at the expanse of white wall, ever aware of the weight of the body in his grasp. "Explain yourself."

"Which part, puppy? Why she had to die or why she must live?"

"Be silent, Kasai! He suffers enough."

A shift of feet on the dirt could be heard. "Yes, Kuki," came the reverent response.

The soft sound of footsteps suddenly began to approach and a moment later a hand touched his arm, followed by the same, unfamiliar voice that spoke at his elbow. "Son of Inu no Taisho, she is not yours to bring back," said Mizu. "Let us have her and you will see that-"

"You brought the flood," the daiyoukai interrupted. The hand jerked away as Mizu stepped back, tears springing to her wide eyes. The reaction was a sufficient answer and he turned to peer over at Chikyu. "And you split the earth." Chikyu was expressionless, but gave a single nod that suggested some sense of resignation. His gaze shifted to a mute, albeit seething Kasai, then came to rest on Kuki, who stood silently by the altar. "You each played a part in taking her life. Why would you return it?"

"We had to," wept Mizu. "She jumped and we had to." As she spoke, she moved back, stumbled over her own feet, and tumbled hard to the ground. 

Kasai hurried forward and scooped the shaking figure into her arms. "Easy, Mizu. You have already spent yourself today. And do not fret; you know this all temporary." Mizu, face buried in her hands and body wracked with sobs, didn't reply. Kasai carried her back to wait beside Chikyu once more, lips curiously pressed to her sister's forehead. 

"She knew, Sesshomaru," said Kuki, drawing the daiyoukai's attention as he remained grudgingly rooted to the spot. "The Mother told her and she knew the consequences of going into the water as surely as she knew the consequences if she didn't." 

As his mind worked to wrap around these outlandish statements, his gaze dropped to Lucidity, the woman who killed to protect life, who valued it above everything. "You claim she willingly sacrificed herself?" Here and now, she had once said, is what mattered. How could she make such a choice? 

"In no uncertain terms," replied Kuki. "More than the life of your imp was at stake. It was her last test to determine if she is worthy of what we might give her. Whether she is worthy to keep the gift and the responsibilities remains to be seen. A balance must be maintained and she is the key. That much the Mother revealed to her." 

"How could you know this?"

Kuki smiled at the question, a calm, if not somber expression as she looked down. "Our mother told us everything that was essential." 

"The word of your Goddess makes no difference to me," Sesshomaru said with a ripple of annoyance. "If it is within your ability to revive Lucidity, then do it. If not-" 

"Of course it's within our ability!" snapped Kasai. "And we weren't told by _the_ Mother, but _our_ mother. We were born from the power of the Guardian, not the Mother Goddess."

"In a way, we were," murmured Mizu, wiping steadily at her eyes. 

"By extension only," Kasai replied with a huff.  

"Quiet, you two," commanded Kuki, then looked at the daiyoukai. "Yes, we can revive her, Sesshomaru, but you must understand what it is to bear the Mother's mark." Kuki pointed a sharp finger at him. "She has branded you as Protector of the Guardian and you must fulfill that duty. If you do not, the world as you know it may be lost." 

"I am bound to duty by no one," was his immediate response. "What happens to this Guardian of yours is no consequence of mine." 

Kasai let out a snort and sneered at him. "Idiot mutt. The one you hold _is_ the Guardian. Or are you so prideful that you would refuse to protect the woman you so mourn for?" 

His claws bit into Lucidity's shoulder, the skin beneath spared any damage by the leather garment. He loathed to admit that he did not understand what was happening, only that he was less than pleased by what he was hearing. How was this be possible? How could a mere human be so deeply entangled with beings as old as the Sisters?

"She is the new Guardian," clarified Kuki suddenly. "The former, long dead, was our mother, and she had us learn all that was needed for the coming of the one who would take up her mantle. We know she was to be spirited out of her time and her name would be as such, the trials she would be put through, our duty that must be done upon her arrival. Everything. We have waited so long and now we...we are...." Kuki placed her hands on the altar and bowed her head, overcome with exhaustion so abrupt that it triggered a response from the stoic Chikyu, who set her burden on the ground and went to Kuki's side, gently gripping her shoulders and bending low to whisper in her ear. 

"We are tired," whispered Mizu to the room. 

Little of what the Sisters said held any relevance for the daiyoukai. He was unfamiliar with whatever or whoever the late Guardian had been and could not understand the significance of it, if there was any, or about what it meant for Lucidity to be the next Guardian. His focus was on their claim that she would be returned to him by their hand and, with a pyre being the only other outcome, he made his way onto the dais and stood across the altar from the two Sisters, while Kasai waited on the dirt with Mizu still in her arms. Kuki and Chikyu raised their heads in unison, gazing at him in silence, as he laid Lucidity upon the smooth, white stone. 

"You will protect her, then, Sesshomaru?" asked Kuki. 

"Not by the whim of the Mother," he replied. 

"Whatever your reasons be, you swear that you will?" the leader of the Sisters demanded, leaning forward on her hands, Chikyu still holding her by the shoulders. 

His claws slid together, hidden by the sleeve of his haori before he finally inclined his head in agreement. What other decision could be made? He listened to Kasai approach the dais as Chikyu separated from Kuki, moving to the head of the altar. Kasai set Mizu on her feet opposite Chikyu, then suddenly came to stand at Sesshomaru's side, tilting her head back the better to look him in the eye from her much shorter height. 

"I wonder which one of us would have been the victor had we met in a true battle," she remarked with a broad grin. 

He did not rise to the banter, but watched as Kuki extracted a glint of silver from Lucidity's throat. 

"Hmm...does she value this?" Kuki asked. 

"Undoubtedly," he said.

"Then let us not destroy it." 

The corner of his mouth pulled down as Kuki undid the clasp and presented the pendant and chain to him. He reached out, his fingers closing over the silver. "By what means do you intend to revive her?" The Sisters looked at one another and Sesshomaru's frown deepened, apprehension stirring, as he stowed the pendant away into the folds of his haori. "Answer me," he ordered. 

"Our lives," said Chikyu, speaking aloud for the first time in a rich monotone. 

"We were not merely born from the power of the former Guardian," said Kuki. "We _are_ the power, separated and given form, left by her to maintain order until a new Guardian came forth. And now that she is here, it is time for us to relinquish what was only ever meant to be a temporary existence." 

"She is human," said Sesshomaru at once. "Her body could never contain your energy." 

"Don't be daft!" Kasai exclaimed. "Why do you think the Mother tapped into her dormant blood to help strengthen her?" 

"And besides, she was never really human," murmured Mizu from where she leaned against the altar. "Not completely." 

"Haven't you ever wondered about her, Sesshomaru?" asked Kuki. "Her abilities are, perhaps, stymied from lack of stimuli and proper instruction, but not entirely." 

Sesshomaru didn't answer, even as certain memories stirred in his mind, moments when Lucidity had caught him by surprise or had been far more aware than should be appropriate for a mortal. And at the same time, he found the idea of any sort of dormant blood absurd. "She is too weak to be anything but," he stated. 

Kasai snorted. "Nothing is set in stone." 

"Think of her body as molded clay," said Kuki as she began to arrange Lucidity's hands upon her stomach, the act of which set his teeth on edge; he did not like these women touching her. "We shall be the fire that hardens the clay," Kuki continued, "so that she might wield the power of the Guardian."  

When she reached for Lucidity's hair, Sesshomaru's hand closed around her wrist. "Enough," he said. "You will tell me what your Goddess intends for her, what it means for her to be your Guardian before I allow this." 

For a moment, Kuki looked at him as the other Sisters shifted around the altar and the scent of their auras began to burn through the air, reminding him that, like his father, he continued to breathe by their good graces. And then Kuki broke his grip with a quick twist of her arm. 

"You overstep, pup," she declared. "Ask your questions of the Isle's Keeper when she awakens. Our time here has ended and your mistress shall rise as the Guardian, just as the Mother has always planned." 

"You will not-" Sesshomaru began, but a glance from her leader was the only warning he had before he felt the hard blow from Kasai.

Who, indeed, would have been victor had their fight been to the death? Sesshomaru had no answer, nor opportunity to give the question much thought, as the force of the attack sent him flying. A flash of red hair entered his field of vision as a fist sank into his stomach, bearing no mind to the armor, the whole of which shattered on impact, and propelled him ever further from the dais. Not even a wall could stop Kasai's assault as the daiyoukai went straight through the solid stone and landed in a heap on the ground, buried in the rubble. Breastplate and pauldron fell from him in pieces as he began to dig himself out, breath ragged and pain sharp, knowing that some significant damage had been done in so short an encounter. Yet he shoved the final bit of stone off all the same, climbing to his feet.

And felt a familiar pulse of power next to his boot.

Sesshomaru stared down at Tenseiga, which had been freed when Kasai had inadvertently sent him through the same wall it had been lodged in, then peered over at the Sisters. Kasai had rejoined them and they each stood serenely around the altar, gazing down at the figure in the center. He heard Tenseiga rattle and understood almost a second too late when the power gathered in a suffocating whirlwind and the forms of the Sisters became washed with an energy so bright that it threatened to blind. Falling to a knee, he grabbed Tenseiga and drove the blade into the ground, moments before the world dissolved into molten light.

The very air was scorched with power and the breaths he inhaled seared his throat and chest. The energy pressed in around him, a weight unto itself that left a ringing in his ears and an ache in his bones. He turned his head from the radiating heat and felt the ground beneath him shake as the thunder of power intensified, sending a shock wave through the earth. The crack of stone resonated and soon he heard the unmistakable rumble of the palace succumbing to the destructive force the Sisters had unleashed. And Sesshomaru could do little more than kneel there, Tenseiga's barrier shielding him from both the full extent of the power and the ceiling as it collapsed around him. Each falling piece was a throbbing cacophony in his ears, but the gust of wind that blew in and began to drive off the oppressive heat had him opening his eyes and lifting his head.

The gentle glow of Tenseiga was still receding when he let the sword drop and slowly rose, taking in the sights around him. The entire dome had broken apart. Sunlight and fresh air filled the cavernous room. The Sisters were gone. Every smell, every hint of their presence, every trace of it had vanished. Sesshomaru stood in a silence so absolute that it was deafening, his gaze sweeping over the shattered stone that littered the ground, surrounding both him and the altar, which had remained perfectly intact, along with the body that lay on its surface with no visible hint of damage or change, save the clothing that had been burnt off. Even as he watched, a few of the tattered remains drifted onto the floor and he automatically stooped to pick up the strange robe that had been spared. He began to approach, uncertain of what would happen, of what he would expect to find, but soon discovered that there was no need for caution. As he came to stand over Lucidity, he found that she was the same, quiet and still, no hint or movement to suggest otherwise. He peered down the length of her naked body, over the curves he had explored only yesterday, before laying the clothing over her form, knowing well there would never be another opportunity again. Whatever it was the Sisters had intended, they'd failed in the attempt.

He paused as the material covered her stomach before pulling it back and staring. The discoloration in her abdomen was gone. There were no signs of internal bleeding, of broken ribs, no suggestion that she had been so much as scratched. How had this not been the first thing he had noticed? His gaze darted up to her face and he let go of the garment in favor of leaning over her once more, lowering his face close to hers, to see if, somehow, he was mistaken, truly mistaken this time. 

"Lucidity?" he whispered, but there was no response. Something clenched inside him and he gritted his teeth, a bitter resentment beginning to stir, a resentment towards the world, the fates, the gods, whatever beings who were responsible for this, who toyed with their lives as though they were little more than pieces in a game. To have their paths cross, to bring them together, only to be separated in an end that came too soon, he could not forgive.

There was no thought behind the action when he brought a hand up and brushed the back of his fingers against her cheek. And then his eyes widened as something crackled the moment his skin touched hers. Streaks of lightning danced between his fingers and he felt the burn of the mark on his palm as Lucidity took in a great shuddering breath and her eyes flew open. Blue eyes. Completely blue. No whites. Yet when she blinked, the color began to recede back into the irises, like water draining from a hand, as she turned her head to look up at him. No pupils, he noted, just like the Sisters. Yet that was not what bothered him. As she sat up, he stepped back, his senses invaded by a smell and aura that left him unsettled. The one before him looked like Lucidity, moved like her, but her scent had been completely altered. It was not unpleasant, but it wasn't her. And the aura that crawled over his skin reminded him of coming storms, of the gathering of thunder and lightning before being unleashed upon the land. Such energy belonged to the likes of youkai, not one who was human, or once had been. 

"What happened?" she asked, pulling the clothing up with both hands to clutch at her breast. "Where are we?"

She even sounded like Lucidity. 

"Sesshomaru?" 

Too much like Lucidity. 

His eyes moved over her as his senses warred with one another, telling him that what he saw could not be true, that this wasn't the woman he had come to the Isle for, but a creature who had taken her face and form. He took another step back when she brought her legs off the altar and turned towards him, the movement having struck him with another wave of this aroma that was not her. She frowned as she drew on the clothing and slid onto the dais.

"What's going on?" she asked as she folded her arms across the material to keep it shut. "Did something happen?" When his lack of answer prompted her to step closer and extend a hand, he caught her wrist, only to immediately release her when that aura began to snake up his arm like a parasite. She yanked her hand back as though burned, looking both affronted and confused. "What's up with you? Talk to me already. What-" 

There seemed to be no end to the madness this day had become when an abrupt tremor put a halt to her questioning. Sesshomaru peered at the ground and could hear the churning down below. Something large was shifting earth and rock beneath the surface, pushing upward to break free. Fractures appeared in the dirt floor and the dais started to crack, the altar soon following. The woman bolted, only to pause when she spotted the weapons and belt on the ground nearby. Sesshomaru, indifferent to the potential threat, jumped off the mound of rising soil and landed beside her. His gaze followed her movements as she latched the belt around her waist to hold her garment in place, then secured the dagger and sword to it, her attention more focused on what was coming than on the daiyoukai. Was this her? he thought. She was different in body. Yet, in every other aspect, was she the same, in mind, in spirit?

"Lucidity," he said and she glanced at him. A flicker of that odd tension from before churned inside him when their eyes met and, irked by his own reaction, he looked away, to the altar that now lay shattered on the ground, to the crumbling earth and dirt that rolled off in clumps from what appeared to be fur.

He moved further back and Lucidity followed him as the ground trembled and a snarl tore through the air as the creature finally broke through. "Creature" was the only appropriate word to describe the thing that crawled out of the soil. A beast in some aspect, a grotesque form of wolf to be precise, jaws nearly as wide as Sesshomaru was tall. Not quite the size of the feline or his true form, but large enough that it cast a shadow upon them. The putrid stench threatened to make him recoil and the mere sight brought a noise of disgust from Lucidity. The creature was a walking carcass of decay. Its skin was shrunken and fur missing in great clumps. Half the face was lost to rot, the white bones of its jaw and skull laid bare. Here and there other bones were exposed, on the legs and rib cage, back of the spine.

A single, milky eye fixed on them and the mouth opened wide as a voice of gravel echoed around the room.

"Guaaardiiiiaaaaan."

* * *

This sudden aversion to her touch was jarring. It didn't make sense. Nothing did. What could have brought about such a drastic change? Her memories of the moment might have been vague, but Lucidity was certain that she hadn't been mistaken about what had happened after she had begun coughing up blood. It had come so swiftly, but he had held her close in the end. She'd felt the strain in him and, as ridiculous as the inclination might had been once upon a time, she hadn't wanted to let go. There was no choice in the matter, of course. She knew some serious damage had been done the second she'd clambered out of the river. The pressure inside, the discomfort, how difficult it had been to breathe, and the pain kept at bay by adrenaline alone. When the blood came, it hadn't been a surprise, really. None of it, in fact, had been much of a surprise, not after what the Mother had shown her. No, only Sesshomaru's reaction took her aback. Whatever was going on with him, however, would have to wait. All of her questions-finding out where the Sisters had gone, what this place was, and why the hell she had woken up naked-would have to wait. 

Lucidity, resisting the urge to cover her nose, stared up at the festering, animated dead thing that towered over her and Sesshomaru, its harsh tones grating against her ears. Just one more matter to take at face value: a talking corpse, one that could apparently see with an eye that should have been blind. How it was capable of sentient thought, though, she couldn't figure out and didn't have much of a chance to contemplate a feasible answer to any of this as the creature lunged forward.

A hand closed over her upper arm and dragged her to the daiyoukai before he leapt out of the path of the oncoming teeth. Lucidity soon found herself on the other side of the strange room, released before she could find her balance and stumbling against the wall, and watched as Sesshomaru went for the beast, Bakusaiga in hand. In the blink of an eye, the thing was split in two just as it turned, so that Bakusaiga sliced down the center width-wise. A clean cut and the body fell with a resounding thud and mild tremor that shook dust from what was left of the ceiling. The entire display was rather anti-climatic as Sesshomaru sheathed his weapon, already heading back this way. It seemed as if Bakusaiga might have been overkill, it had been so easy. 

It took Lucidity a moment to realize she had unconsciously gripped the hilt of her own sword. There was no need for it. Logically, she was aware of this, but her stomach was knotted with uncertainty. Not because it had been so simple for Sesshomaru to dispatch such a revolting thing, but because she just...just knew. Something was wrong, but she didn't know how to tell Sesshomaru this. She kept her eyes on the remains, staring into the hollow of its chest, at the old bone encased with shriveled skin, glinting in the sunlight, and tried to think. And then she frowned, taking a step closer. 

Sesshomaru, seeing this, stopped and glanced over his shoulder. Apparently he hadn't noticed, because he soon looked back at her and asked, "What is it?"

"There's something.... [Oh, shit,]" she muttered, but it wasn't necessary. 

Sesshomaru turned to face the rumbling echo as the massive body jerked and spasmed and promptly threaded itself back together with much popping of bone and sinew. The beast rose in a movement that was too agile for its size, and not to mention its rotting limbs. It spun around with a growl that had Lucidity taking a step back. If Bakusaiga couldn't do any lasting damage.... She glanced over at Sesshomaru, who was staring up at the beast, a slight furrow in his brow. A second later, he was leaping into the air, bringing the sword down once more, but the beast managed to duck out of the way. The blade glanced off its shoulder, creating a deep cut that did nothing to slow it down as it turned in a roar of fangs and fur and snapped at Sesshomaru, who deflected the attack with a hard punch to the snout that sent the creature skidding into the dirt. 

Straight at Lucidity. 

She darted to the side and heard the sickening crunch of breaking bone when the beast collided with the stone. When she turned around, she found that it had slid further than she'd first realize, it was so far from her now, getting to its feet, staggering for a moment, its head hanging at an odd angle from the broken neck. And then the head snapped up, set in place, and the beast faced the room once more, fangs bared. 

"Guuuuaaaardiiiiaaan," it said again. "Yoooouuuu...thiiiiis-waaas-yooooouuu." Each word was punctuated with a clipping echo of teeth against teeth, the voice long, raspy, and guttural, and its tongue flopping in its mouth like a limp doll. The entire display, coupled with the rancid smell of decomposition, was stomach-churning-New-Year's-morning-going-to-vomit disgusting. 

This time, Lucidity did cover her nose, tasting bile in the back of her throat. Gods be damned. What the hell was going on? What did this thing want? It paid no mind to the daiyoukai walking the edge of the room and giving it a wide berth. For a moment, Lucidity was distracted when she noticed Sesshomaru stop and pick something off the ground. Tenseiga. What was Tenseiga doing there? Hadn't he used it on her? 

The clattering snap of jaws brought her back to the real issue at hand. And that issue was currently charging right at her, every strike of paw on the ground a warning cry to get her ass moving. And move she did, her feet kicking up dirt and rock as she sprinted out of its path, only to see the creature immediately shift in the same direction and was now closing in. She backpedaled, losing both momentum and her footing, and crashed to the ground, landing hard on her back, and felt teeth close in on her leg. On sheer reflex, she kicked out, despite how useless it was. Her foot connected with the beast's jawbone.

And it broke.

The beast reared back, shaking its head, the lower jaw hanging on by a sliver of skin as Lucidity gaped up at the sight, having absolutely no clue what the hell just happened. Slowly, she managed to remember that she should be on the defensive, that there was actual danger here, and started to pick herself up off the ground, just as a streak of white came bounding forward. Better late than ever, she thought dully, watching as Sesshomaru carved a deep gash across the chest of the beast before it could get out of reach. Yet neither of their attacks seemed to be doing any lasting damage. The jaw had already reattached itself and the open wound made no difference to the rotting corpse, whether it was made by Tenseiga or not, as the beast lunged forward again.

And Sesshomaru apparently came to this same conclusion because he was suddenly there, Tenseiga sheathed, and grabbed hold of her. The beast snapped at open air as Sesshomaru dodged its gaping mouth and propelled them upward, Lucidity wrapping her arms automatically around his neck. Again came the clattering noise of teeth hitting teeth, over and over, forcing Sesshomaru to dart this way and that, rising higher and higher, trying to gain better ground, with Lucidity able to do nothing but hold on. She could see sky, caught a glimpse of a forest, and heard the beast snarling down below, leaping for them, coming closer.

Sesshomaru grunted and air was suddenly whistling in her ears as the world came plummeting down. Trees disappeared. The shattered architecture returned, and the growls of the beast were close, too close. Lucidity barely had time to register the situation, that the beast had succeeded in clamping down on Sesshomaru's leg, when it flung them away. Sesshomaru's arms were tight around her and she felt the resonating impact as his body collided with a wall. She knew it could only be a wall and not the ground because the stone collapsed in around them. Great broken heaps of it rained down, one on top of the other, on top of them, and more importantly on her. There was no daiyoukai to shield her from the landslide this time, because he had landed beneath her. He couldn't....

Comprehension was slow to dawn as Lucidity pushed herself up. Rocks and dirt tumbled off of her. She was covered in dust, feeling a few aches, but nothing more. There was a weight on her back and, when she shifted, a chunk of stone, easily the same size as her, slid off and onto the ground. She stared at it, eyes wide, mouth open, then dropped her gaze to Sesshomaru, as if he could somehow explain just what the fuck was going on. Yet she had barely caught a glimpse of golden eyes when he suddenly seized her and rolled them over, in time to bear the brunt of teeth that were descending. A fang pierced clean through his shoulder, another his side, as he was lifted up. Blood spread through the white of his clothes, dripped onto her, and she became vaguely aware that his armor was missing before the beast tossed him aside.

Again, she saw it. As the thing turned to throw Sesshomaru onto another heap of rubble, something gleamed in the open cavity of its chest. And she knew, she _knew_ the answer lay there, just as surely as she knew this creature was more interested in her than the daiyoukai when the massive, decaying head with one eye focused on her. The mouth opened wide one more time, the tongue dangling out, and she bolted upright, onto her feet, and sprinted between the outstretched legs. She had no idea what was happening, why it was happening, or what exactly had happened to her, but she pushed all her confusion, all trepidation, every last ounce of fear aside as she plunged a hand, a wrist, her entire arm through the shriveled flesh, breaking through bone as if it was nothing more than thin glass, and felt her fingers close over an object that was small and smooth, something that, for some reason, she wasn't surprised was there.

The moment it was in her grasp, the beast roared and the power flared in her hand, hot, bright, and hers. As natural as breathing, she controlled it, letting the power exhale, letting it strike everything in its path. The beast snarled and bucked, tossed its head and finally howled as its body burst apart in a shower of rotten flesh, bone, and white, cascading energy. Lucidity felt that energy as though it was her own arm extending and gradually brought it back to her side. The light dissipated and solidified into a long, thin pole that ended in a sharp point on one side, while a blade curved along the other. It resembled a war scythe and at the same time reminded her of a naginata, not quite one or the other.

She lowered the scythe with the blade point down, just as the sound of footsteps reached her ears. Sesshomaru came to stand beside her, his gaze on the weapon, and didn't say a word, not even when she retracted the energy a bit more, feeling as if she was doing little more than inhaling. There was a gentle glow as the blade disappeared and the pole shrank until it was no larger than a flute. Sesshomaru looked at her then and she him, taking in his haggard appearance for the first time. With his armor gone, he seemed smaller, even with the mass of fur over his shoulder. His hakama and haori were both torn and bloodied, including the leg the beast had bitten down on. Every inch of him was more or less covered in dust and she could see the sweat on his brow mixing with the grime, making it darker on his pale skin. Overall, he really looked like shit.

"How did you know that was there?" he eventually asked, his voice hinting at nothing that might suggest exhaustion or pain.

She shook her head. "No idea. Just...just what in the seven hells is going on? What happened after I passed out or...no, after I died? I mean.... Fuck...." she added, trailing off and looking back at the sealed weapon. Shit, she had really...actually...she had fucking died! Again....

"My Lady."

Not the least bit welcoming, this new voice had Lucidity jerking her head up. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Sesshomaru's hand close over the hilt of Bakusaiga as they both peered around. The source of the voice soon became apparent as a figure began to rise from the soil, only to stop just as quickly, the mound reaching no higher than her shoulder. Suddenly, the mound shuddered, the top of it quivering and.... It was a woman, shaking her head, then her shoulders, and finally she was brushing dirt off her clothes. She was thin and elderly, a bit stooped with round shoulders and messy, twig-like hair, which wasn't surprising since she was roughly the same color and texture as the earth she had just emerged from.

"You have questions, my Lady?" the old woman asked. "I would be happy to answer them if you do. And I'm quite certain you do."

"I...." began Lucidity, with a glance to Sesshomaru, who was watching the newcomer with narrowed eyes. Swallowing, Lucidity peered back at her. "Who are you?"

The old woman smiled, indulging in a way, and gave a low, respectful bow. "Forgive me. I am Rusuban, Keeper of the Isle."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man...so much stuff happening. Anyone have any questions? Because you might have to wait until the next chapter for the answers.


	28. Chapter 28

"I see you have destroyed that revolting _lycanthrope_ ," remarked Rusuban, moving the broken remains of a fang with her foot. "It was put here as a type of fail-safe, animated by the weapon you now hold, which can only mean that you are the one we have been waiting for, my dear. Here, let me look at you."

Lucidity was dumbstruck, unable to make heads or tails of anything, as Rusuban stepped in front of her and took her face in surprisingly strong hands. Trying to process everything was the only reason that she stood there and let the old woman turn her head one way, then the other, brush her thumbs over cheekbones and even feel the texture of her blonde hair. Lucidity gazed back at her, but couldn't find it in herself to knock those hands away or start demanding an explanation. The old woman was so passive, not presenting the slightest semblance of a threat. And yet in spite of her appearance, Lucidity didn't believe this was someone she could bully for an answer. And not someone she would want to bully either. Not out of fear, but rather a presence that demanded a measure of deep regard.

"You are taller than your predecessor," Rusuban said, easing Lucidity's head up as though hoping to the catch the already all-encompassing light of the sun. "Exotic, too. You must have traveled very far to come here, even before you were taken out of your era."

"Er..." was about all Lucidity could manage.

Rusuban lowered her arms and smiled gently. "You must be very confused right now, probably wondering any number of things. There is a lot we must talk about and I will tell you everything that I am able. Oh, but before we begin, might I ask your names?"

Lucidity gave hers and Rusuban nodded before peering over at Sesshomaru, who had neither moved nor spoken this entire time. His mouth turned down at the corner, jaw working, with the two women watching him and his arms slid into opposite sleeves in a mute refusal to play along with pleasantries.

"I can simply call you my Lady's protector if you wish," said Rusuban. "I can imagine that this is difficult, the burden that has been placed on you, and I know the Sisters could not have made the experience an easy one. Your appearance alone suggests an exhausting battle. Might I offer a relaxing bath in the hot springs below the palace? I'm afraid we don't have much in the way of medicinal remedies, but a change of clothes perhaps?"

"I have no need of your hospitality," was the daiyoukai's curt response.

Rusuban gave another smile. "As you wish, young protector."

His jaw worked again. "Sesshomaru," he finally told her.

Rusuban's smile widened and she bowed. "Sesshomaru. Lady Lucidity. Let us leave the ceremonial chambers to somewhere we might converse that does not smell like death."

Sesshomaru was the first to follow Rusuban while Lucidity stayed where she was, staring after them, and then turning her attention to the destruction that surrounded her. Her fingers felt over the thin length of the weapon in her grasp and she wondered if this was simply some bizarre, fantastical dream where she had claimed a magical scythe and had strength to rival that of a youkai, because the realty of it was just...insane. Utterly and completely insane and impossible to process. She couldn't begin-

"Lucidity."

She looked over at the daiyoukai, who waited beside Rusuban at a pair of double doors, and recalled, in some dim corner of her mind, that something was wrong with him, too. He was acting odd, at least prior to the attack from the lycanthrope. (And how Rusuban knew that word was a mystery.) Yet his actions during the foray led her to believe that maybe he was over whatever was bothering him, as she could read nothing in his face as she slid the sealed scythe into her belt, then trailed after him and Rusuban through the door and out into a long, vast hall of rising pillars and white marble.

The style was definitely not of this country and reminded her more of ancient Rome or Greece. All that was missing was that statue of Athena. Yet there were statues here, gold and silver ones of young girls or short women; she couldn't be sure which. What she was certain of was the fact that some of them were moving. And as she watched, more began to stretch and yawn, becoming softer in appearance, more like flesh and less like stone. And though she kept walking, she stared openly at these tiny women, who each gaped and pointed and whispered, while Rusuban and Sesshomaru continued on ahead, completely unmoved by the spectacle.

At one point, Rusuban suddenly clapped her hands together and announced, "That's enough, girls. We've all been asleep for who knows how long. Time to get to work and make this dwelling habitable." Her words were immediately followed by a flurry of excitement as the women scattered in separate directions, laughing and giggling, obviously ecstatic to be servants who were serving again. Hopefully no one broke out into a verse of "Be Our Guest."

Lucidity looked around, following their movements, and realized that the niches they had all been standing in as statues were actually entrances into rooms. Traditional tatami rooms, complete with sliding doors and everything, but were framed by Roman pillars. Such a strange combination. Further along, she spotted other hallways branching off, more servants running around, and wondered at the vastness of the place.

"Where are we?" she asked.

"Well," Rusuban said, leading them down one of the other halls, "this was once a temple, but was converted not long after its construction into a sort of home. The people who used to live here called it the Palace of the Guardian. Not terribly original, but it is fitting, considering this is the Isle of the Guardian. Though it is my understanding that in the last millennia, it has become more commonly known as the Isle of the Four Sisters."

Lucidity stopped. "This is the Isle? But who is the-"

"Oh yes. Now come, this way," interrupted Rusuban without breaking stride and forcing Lucidity to catch up, unable to voice her latest question. At the end of the hall, there was a single door, large and very much out of place, considering it was made of heavy wood with a thick iron handle that Rusuban managed to pull open with one hand; frail, little old woman indeed.

After all the blindingly alabaster walls and floors, Lucidity was startled by the sight of vegetation. Vines swayed above the doorway, brushing the top of Sesshomaru's head when he walked through after Rusuban. Lucidity followed the pair and drew the door shut behind her with nary a thought, too distracted by her surroundings. They had stepped out onto a veranda, made of the same marble as the rest of the palace. Yet almost everything was covered in a thick foliage. The veranda was enormous with an ample ceiling and high columns. More vines covered or wrapped or hung from the area, along with many, many flowers of various colors and shapes, as if the place hadn't quite decided on what sort of floral decor it wanted. In a far, shadowed corner that seemed to be the source of the vegetation, Lucidity caught a glimpse of something peeking out behind the thick, green tendrils, something that emitted a soft glow and filled her with an alarming sense of ease. She didn't think, but made a beeline for it, ignoring all else, and ducked beneath the vines.

A pool. A large circular pool of water gleamed as if light of a full moon was forever shining on its surface. The basin in which it was kept was high enough to reach her waist and looked to be carved of raw granite. From beneath the basin was where the vegetation grew. It covered every inch of the floor and walls, created curtains where there were no walls, with many more vines simply dangling overhead. The glow of the pool cast flickering shadows over every dip and curve of foliage and gave such an odd impression that it was whispering secrets in the dancing patterns. Coming to stand over the basin, she peered into the water and saw no reflection staring back at her. And yet this didn't unsettle her. If anything, she lowered herself onto the edge of the basin and watched the light playing along the surface as if it were an old friend.

"Oh? You have discovered Sagashite."

Lucidity looked over at the sound of Rusuban's voice and saw her standing beneath the vines, Sesshomaru beside her, his arm creating a small doorway for him and the shorter woman. But then Sesshomaru stepped forward to study the sparkling pool and the vines fell back into place, smacking Rusuban in the face.

"How rude," she huffed and brushed a leaf off her cheek as she approached.

"What is this?" Lucidity asked, peering back into the water.

"Sagashite," Rusuban repeated. "It has several uses. The main of which is-no, let us not cheapen the experience with words. Lucidity, think of a place or person in this country and touch the water."

Frowning slightly, she glanced at the old woman, who simply encourage with a nod and a soft "go on." There were still so many more pressing matters, so many questions to ask, and yet she was dead curious. This little alcove of shimmering lights and enchanted water was so enthralling that she wanted to prolong the moment, and so did as she was instructed. She dipped the pad of a single finger into the water, her mind on only one destination. The surface immediately rippled, glowing a fraction brighter, then settled. And even though she had a pretty good idea at this point of what would happen, it didn't stop the gasp from escaping her as she leaned over and took in the sight of the village.

There was no sound, no smell, but she could see the buildings and the people as clear as day. She recognized the area as the one outside the hut she'd been gifted with before the samurai came, which was exactly what she had been picturing. The foot traffic was heavy. It was the middle of the day in the midst of harvest season. So many carts being pulled and sacks of grain being carried. After a moment of hesitation, Lucidity touched the water again. Once more, the surface rippled and the scene changed. The twins and Rin were running around outside of Sango's hut, kicking a ball back and forth that was almost as large as the two smaller girls. Sango herself was sitting with Miroku, both of them indulging their laughing, chubby-cheeked son.

A lump constricted in Lucidity's throat. The sight filled her with such a bitter elation. She well and truly had taken them all for granted. It hadn't mattered that she didn't understand the reason for their fondness of her. She should have simply accepted it and their friendship. Never before had she known such people, so selfless and wanting to help. They had done so much and she had never repaid them. She'd never be able to. She swallowed heavily and rose to her feet, no longer wishing to look upon the blissful family. The second the thought crossed her mind, the image vanished and the pool returned to its quiet, shimmering self.

A sudden movement from Sesshomaru had her lifting her head. He'd taken a step towards the basin and his claws scraped over the stone, only to draw back when he noticed her watching him. It was Rin, she realized. She'd cut the thread of whatever magic was in the water before he was ready for it to end. She held her hand over the surface. "Do you want-" she began, but he was already turning away, striding out of the alcove and pushing the green curtain aside with an air of impatience. At a loss, she lowered her arm and peered over at Rusuban.

"So that...that is one of its uses," the old woman said gently. "So long as you know what the person or place you wish to see looks like, Sagashite will show you. That being said, it also must be within your domain. The Sight of Sagashite cannot stretch beyond your boundaries."

"My...domain?" Lucidity repeated. "What do you mean?"

"Let us find your companion and I shall explain."

That was not at all difficult. The moment they emerged from the alcove, Lucidity spotted Sesshomaru a little ways beyond the veranda, waiting in an enormous courtyard that opened up into a meadow and the forest beyond. Yet none of that was what caught her attention. It was the tree Sesshomaru was standing under, his head craned back to take in the utter...the utter magnitude of it! If it hadn't been for the tunnel vision Sagashite had created, this would have been the first sight to draw her. And what a sight it was! As she walked down the steps of the veranda, she felt her lips part as she, too, tilted her head back and gawked up the tree that would have dwarfed most buildings back in her era. It was no skyscraper or redwood, but the sheer thickness and size of it put Goshinboku to absolute shame. And as she walked along the grass, feeling the dewy blades beneath her bare feet, she could feel the subtle hum of power pulsating through the air and ground alike. The leaves and branches swayed, but there was no wind. It wasn't frightening. It was just like Sagashite. This place...it almost felt like.... But how could it?

"Hahaoya no Shikyu," announced Rusuban. "The very heart of your domain. Your power will always be the strongest in your own territory, but here it is at its peak. No enemy can touch you on the Isle. As it was with the Sisters, none are able set foot on this land without your consent. You and yours will always be safe here. And should you ever be gravely injured, resting in the embrace of the Hahaoya no Shikyu will quicken your healing considerably. This is-"

"Rusuban," Lucidity murmured.

"Oh, uh, yes, my Lady?"

"One thing at a time," she said and glanced over at Sesshomaru, whose eyes remained fixated on the Hahaoya no Shikyu. "It would be great if someone could tell me what happened with the Sisters...and what was done to me. I want to know this first before anything else." 

"Of course," said Rusuban. "But we should sit. Come, come."

And the old woman hurried forward, settling herself onto a large, high root, and smiled up at Lucidity, who was suddenly too apprehensive to even consider relaxing. The insistence of being told to sit was not often followed by good news. 

"So, let's see," Rusuban began as Lucidity tentatively approached her. "The Sisters, yes...and you wish to know what they did to you. Forgive me, my Lady, but this is not a simple answer. I would have to start at the beginning." 

Lucidity's stomach churned slightly as apprehension started to edge towards alarm. Her hands clenched, fingers digging into her palms, and she took a deep breath to quiet the sudden racing of her heart. Rusuban watched her with patient indulgence, then gestured at a spot across from her, another root to rest upon. Not knowing what else to do, Lucidity gave in and sat, waiting for Rusuban to start, only to hear the soft footsteps as Sesshomaru came over. 

"Tell me what the Guardian is," he ordered. 

Rusuban gave a thoughtful hum. "I suppose that is a decent subject to start with. The Sisters made mention of her, yes?" 

Lucidity frowned as Sesshomaru folded his arms, noticing the muscle of his jaw working once more, though his expression remained blank. What had him so on edge? And what did this Guardian have anything to do with what was going on or the answers they had come for? She glanced over at Rusuban, who was adjusting a wrinkle in her garments before finally folding her hands on top of her knees and looking up at Lucidity. 

"You both bear the mark of the Mother?" the old woman asked and continued after Lucidity showed her palm. "And you see that it has seven points, which is in direct relation to the seven Guardians of the world. Each Guardian has her own domain that she watches over. Of the seven, the most pronounced are the Guardians of the North, South, East, and West. They are the only ones who have taken on the guises of different objects or creatures over the the course of time. The other three have never been inclined towards the appearances of a physical nature, which is all very well because their domains-Above, Below, and Within-are too abstract a construct to allow for such limitations. Do you understand?"  

Oddly enough, Lucidity did and nodded, while Sesshomaru remarked, "You speak of them as though they were gods." 

Rusuban smiled. "That man would believe he could put a face on his god is arrogance beyond measure. The concept is far greater than most can perceive, but, alas, the masses are of the mundane mind. The Mother Goddess may surround us, but we could never truly know Her face. The Guardians are the closest that anyone shall ever come. They are, in the most basic of terms, Her daughters. Born of Her essence, they are the Mother's spirit given form in this world. There has and always will be a balance to maintain. Where there is life, there will be death, forces we can never fully understand warring against one another, forever seeking that balance in one battle or another. The Guardians were created to help maintain that balance. They have existed since the planet was in its infancy, long before insects or birds or animals of any type graced the lands. 

In the beginning, no Guardian took on a physical form, though each was equally powerful and free to use that power anywhere as needed. Yet, over time, as continents drifted and oceans rose and fell, the Guardians began to-for lack of better word-specialize in certain areas. They all retained some portion of their original abilities, but soon they divided into their own domains where their specialized abilities were the most enhanced. And thus you have the Guardian of the North, Guardian of the South, Guardian of the East, and Guardian of the West. The last three are not so confined and have always continued as they are, but these four have changed drastically over the endless courses of their lives. From being the fire of a volcano or the tsunami that swept the ocean, the tallest mountain in the world or the wind that covered them all, the Guardians have only recently in the last few million years taken on the appearance of animals, usually those of the four-legged variety, but not always. The West was particularly fond of serpents, while the South preferred creatures that were more water-based. Yet still more recently, only after the creatures became so widespread, have the Guardians adopted the guise of humans." 

By this point, Lucidity was hanging onto every word. Rusuban's story enraptured her so completely that she hadn't realized she'd forgotten the reason for the tale until Rusuban unexpectedly paused. Dare she believe such a fantasy? What Rusuban implied, that these were the forces behind the creation of the planet and all life that existed, was too radical to accept at face value. Yet she didn't question or even attempt to speak as Rusuban brushed her hands over her legs, smoothing out the material of her clothing in a nervous tick it seemed, and peered from one captive audience to the other, as if anticipating a flood of inquiries. When none came, she let out a sigh, apparently disappointed that there was no need for further procrastination. 

"Now, what you must understand is that, until that moment in time, the Guardians had lived separate from mortals. But this steadily became impossible, unless the Guardians wished to become isolated from the rest of the world, which could not happen. They are protectors of their realms and could never shut themselves away without the consequences being dire. And though they maintained a sense of aloofness from humans, the interactions increased in frequency over the centuries until one Guardian was seized with an idea-a fevered desire, to be more accurate-that was beyond the comprehension of her sisters. She became a fanatic over the matter and pleaded with the Mother. She wished to understand humans more completely, these creatures whose very existences the Guardians had been charged with. She was enamored with them and wanted to learn the significance of a mortal life and, in doing so, intended to relinquish her power as a Guardian, her immortality, and become human herself. 

The Mother could not allow this, to allow the balance to be so disrupted by the absence of a Guardian. And so the Guardian devised a way, with the help of the Mother, that a successor would rise in however many centuries it would take to conceive and that the domain would remain protected until then. From the power willingly surrendered, the Four Sisters were born, each with an aspect of that power as hers to command, some weaker and others stronger, to maintain order. 

This Guardian of whom I speak is the South. She lived in a land far from here and survived her mortal life to the fullest, from what I understand, until old age took her and her bones became dust in the wind. And the Sisters of the South were relentless in their cause, youthful and vigorous, ever eager to protect, to fight, until the centuries accumulated into too great a number. They grew weary and simply slept, rising only when there was great need, and then, finally, their newborn mother, the potential Guardian, came as promised. Born of mortal woman and sired by the essence of the Mother, she had faced many trials before she finally came to the Sisters, when they took the life she laid down and returned it to her in full by surrendering the power of the Guardian to the one to whom it rightfully belonged."

A numbness had settled over Lucidity by the time Rusuban finished. Every syllable was sharp in her ears, in spite of the ringing heartbeat. Each pulse was a steady throb felt throughout the entirety of her body, from toes to fingertips. She sat there, gaping openly at Rusuban, no clear thought filling her head, only a detachment as the weight of what she was being told sank in, little by little. When Rusuban slid off the root and onto her knees, there was no reaction from Lucidity, who simply gazed down at the old woman. Knobby hands clasped hers as Rusuban peered up at her, expression one of pity and kindness, that gentle smile ever playing on her lips.

"O, my Lady," whispered the old woman. "You are aware of the implications, I know. But bear with me for I must tell you more. This happened some centuries ago, perhaps more than I can say for certain. The Guardian of the South is unique among her sisters. Born and raised as human and yet so very far from the truth. Her existence has been one of near isolation from the other Guardians. None of them can relate to her. None until now, not until the Guardian of the East chose the same path. A shock to us all, really. The South desired to be closer to the humans as a whole. The East, however, chose because of a single human. She gave up her power to live and die with a mortal husband, to have a family. Unheard of. Completely unheard of. None of us ever believed her capable of such strong emotions to influence so great a decision. O, but, she was so happy with her human! She could not bear to be without him. And when he left at the end of his life, she followed soon after." Rusuban shook her head, her expression becoming wistful. "A tale of tales, to be certain. But that chapter is long over. You are here now. These are the answers you have no doubt sought ever since you were brought to this place in time. And there is still much to tell you. I cannot imagine what must be going through your mind right now, but I can appreciate that you will need time to adjust. The burden of the Guardian's mantle will not be easy to bear."

The sincerity of the old woman was a hollow thing in her ears. Lucidity was a stranger in her own body. She could feel herself sitting at the base of the great tree, but it was not her. The hands Rusuban held were not her hands. And when her lips moved, it was someone else who spoke for her, who stammered and tried to force the words out. "[N-n-no, that...n-no...I-I'm not....]" 

"Forgive me, my Lady," said Rusuban. "I do not understand your language." 

Swallowing, Lucidity shook her head and pulled her hands free. Rusuban remained on her knees while Lucidity tried to remember, tried to get a grasp on herself. She couldn't stay like this, lost inside so thick a fog. She couldn't...wouldn't allow it. Again, she shook her head, screwing her eyes shut, and dug for the frail thing that was her mind and, frailer still, her voice. "What...what you say," she murmured, "can't be true." 

Rusuban sighed. "It is, my dear. You will come to learn in time." 

"No!" Lucidity interjected, voice growing stronger as her focus sharpened, if only for a moment. "No! I'm not some...I'm not the daughter of any deity. My parents were-no Goddess in her right mind would choose someone like my mother!" 

"The woman you were born to was the first trial, for you to learn the value of a mother's love when so cruelly denied it." 

The words sent a physical jolt through her, enough that she jerked back from the old woman, bracing herself against the root, feet firmly on the ground, ready to bolt. And yet she couldn't move, frozen as she was with ever increasing horror and a rising sense of panic. She wanted to scream, to run, to reject everything she heard and live in blissful ignorance, because this wasn't the truth. It couldn't be! It wasn't...it just wasn't possible! She was no one of consequence. Another common human, nothing more. That was her reality and she couldn't begin to imagine any other. Didn't want to! 

"I know this is difficult for you to accept," Rusuban continued, rising to her feet. "It will take time, as I've said, which you now have in abundance. There is more you must know, but I believe you have heard enough for today. Sesshomaru, is there anything else you wish to hear? We might speak separately if you do so, to give my Lady a reprieve." 

Dumbly, Lucidity peered over at the daiyoukai, whom she'd nearly forgotten about. He stood so quietly, observing the events unfolding before him with his usual air of indifference. Golden eyes met hers and she was suddenly reminded of the first time she saw him, with Rin and Jaken, as distinctly cold and distant then as he was now, the untouchable youkai lord. 

He said nothing, but abruptly turned in a soft whirl of silk and fur. 

Lucidity found her feet and her voice in the same instant. "Sessho-" 

"I will return when I see fit," he said without breaking stride. "Do not follow me." 

"He is such a rude, young man," Rusuban sniffed as he walked off. "But you are attached to him, yes?" 

Lucidity didn't answer, but stared after the daiyoukai's silhouette that was gradually swallowed by the forest. His retreat made the moment all the more surreal. She wished, rather desperately, for him to stay, but she wasn't about to go tearing after him. Whatever was on his mind, he clearly wanted to be left alone and...she didn't know what to do regardless. She had never felt so lost. 

"Let us get you out of those clothes, shall we? Find you something more fitting?" came the gentle suggestion from Rusuban. 

Lucidity looked over at the old woman, mind far from working properly, and could only nod. Rusuban beamed and started to make her way back to the palace. After one last glance towards the forest, Lucidity trailed after her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good god, this has been a long time coming! There are a few more minor details to hash out and include later, but this is the bulk of it. We finally have some answers! If there is something in here that is not clear, though, feel free to ask. I will try to explain as best as I can, fix it if necessary, or let you know if the explanation will be in another chapter. ^.^


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heads up for this chapter: when the point of view switches, it will backtrack a few minutes so you can see what is happening with Sesshomaru and Lucidity at the same time. Just FYI, since this is the first time I've done it for this story.

Steam clouded the room. More cavern than room, actually, that housed an ample hot spring with a strange quality to the water that gave it a glow of bioluminescence. Lucidity knew enough about biology to understand that this required an organism of some type, be it plant or animal, but could find nothing in the water to suggest that there was any other living thing in here but her. She could only assume it was something less than natural, but harmless all the same, and attempted to enjoy the tranquil, iridescent blue of her surroundings. A feat that would be made easier if she wasn't still trapped in the hold of her mind. Not as completely as she had been at first; she could find her voice more easily now, at least, but she still felt as if she was floating about in a dream, rather than being on a cold, hard earth.

She went through the motions of bathing after Rusuban had brought her here. The old woman had promised nothing more than a change of clothes, but Lucidity hadn't argued, nor cared. The servants had scurried about and presented her with a bucket of soaps and oils and other items she had long since forgone. No medicine, but they were clearly not lacking in other accommodations. She was even given a cotton robe to wear out of the hot spring once she decided to venture back to the surface world. As it were, she had no idea how long she'd been down here. She'd finished washing ages ago and was currently relaxing at one of the edges of the hot spring. Water lapped around her shoulders as she picked up a fragment of stone, broken off from a much larger piece, and crushed it in her hand. With her head resting on an arm, she watched the dust sift out from beneath her fingers to drift onto the pile that had slowly been accumulating. She reached for another rock and repeated the action, over and over. She had long since lost count of how many times she'd done this. The first time had been an accident, when she went to lift herself out of the water and the stone had cracked under her hands. She did it again, just to see if she was mistaken or if it had been a fluke somehow, and had yet to stop. 

Not even when she heard footsteps and caught a glimpse movement just outside her field of vision did she cease crushing bits of rock. But then a knobby, old hand pushed the dust into the water before reaching for the fist that remained poised above, ready to add more to the depleted pile. Fingers carefully pried the rock loose and let it fall away. 

"Enough of that, my Lady," said Rusuban. "You will drive yourself to a distraction that you will never return from. The sun has gone to sleep since I left you here. Come now with me. Come, come." 

The robe was shaken in front of Lucidity's face and she lifted her head to peer up at the old woman. Had it really been so long? She'd been in the hot spring for hours, but didn't want to move. And who would tell her otherwise? There was no one on this Isle who could force her. She could stay down here for as long as she liked. What a stupid thought, though. Resigned to the fate of facing some small portion of the world, Lucidity picked herself out of the water and allowed Rusuban to help her with the robe. She tied it in place and watched as the old woman stooped to pick up the toiletries before following her up through the torch-lit tunnel that led back into the palace. Servants were still rushing about and several stopped to speak with Rusuban, asking where something was, what needed to go where, what rooms needed to be aired out, if food should be prepped, and so on. A curiosity stirred in the recesses of her brain, one which she quickly grabbed onto.

"When you say you are the Keeper of the Isle," Lucidity said as the last servant hurried off, taking with her the bucket the old woman had been carrying, "does that mean you are the head of the household?" 

"Keeper, caretaker, head of household," Rusuban replied, continuing down the hall. "Whatever title suits the century we are in. What century is it, by the way?" And when Lucidity told her, she shook her head. "The Four Sisters have put us to sleep for the better part of a thousand years. No wonder the home is in dire straits. And for the Isle to be put in a stasis for that long! Ah, well, the creatures will return eventually. Who knows? Maybe there will be a village here again one day." 

Of all that she heard, Lucidity repeated only one word: "Stasis?"

"Yes, the entire Isle, the girls, and myself were put into a stasis when the Sisters went to sleep, just as those in the south did when the waiting became too much. Yet with your being here, everything has awakened." Rusuban gave her a smile, which Lucidity did not return, then heaved a great sigh. "O, my Lady, I am sorry this is so difficult for you. When you are ready to hear more, I will tell you. But for now, let us make you as comfortable as possible. In here."

And she opened a set of double doors, carved with a spiral, that was at the end of the hall, bringing Lucidity into what appeared to be a small den or study of some type. Most of the room was lined with shelves, each shelf filled to the brim with scrolls or tomes. An ancient and very out of date atlas hung on one wall. A heavy and detailed tapestry hung on another, depicting a maiden with what appeared to be a lion on one side and-of all things-a unicorn on the other. There were reclining couches evenly spaced throughout the room, with one set in front of an unlit fireplace. Again, there was the mix of cultures in the decor, with the furniture and artwork from one country or another, while the floors were lined with tatami mats and, on the other side of the room, was a second door that slid open. Beyond that, there was an alcove in front of a window, just large enough for a person to sit comfortably in and look upon the courtyard. And, still further, an open, arched doorway that led into a bedroom. With an honest to gods bed!

Lucidity stared at the four-poster masterpiece draped with hangings currently tied in place. Covered in pillows and furs, she had never seen anything so inviting after living so long with futons and patches of grass for beds. She went over to touch the drapes, relishing in their silken texture, then pressed down on the bedding itself, wondering what something like this was made of in this era.

"I have never understood why the former Guardian insisted upon such splendor in her own chambers," remarked Rusuban from somewhere in the background. "She never did get much use out of it and neither will you, I'm afraid."

"What do you mean?" Lucidity asked, running her hand over one of the furred blankets.

"Guardians do not sleep often; perhaps no more than once in a season. But you might have more need of rest until you come into your full strength. Here, my dear," she suddenly added.

Still trying to digest this latest bit of information, Lucidity approached Rusuban, noticing for the first time the room divider the old woman stood next to with a vanity mirror on her other side. Hanging from the divider was the coat and belt, while a quick glance around showed the weapons nearby on a table. Rusuban was holding up what appeared to be a silk kimono of icy blue, almost white. Yet when Lucidity removed the cotton robe and drew on the kimono, she was surprised at how light and soft it was, like air woven into fabric. Though there was so much fabric, with her feet well hidden and sleeves that draped over her hands, she didn't know how that was possible. An actual sash rather than an obi, lighter in color, was wrapped around Lucidity's waist a few times before Rusuban secured everything in place with a silver clasp at the back.

"There now. Don't you look lovely," said Rusuban as she pulled Lucidity in front of the mirror. "I'll have you know that your predecessor made her own clothes. Everything in the wardrobe that is now yours was created by her hands. Durable, better than any armor man or youkai might create. Yet you feel as if you're wearing the clouds themselves. No one could reproduce her fine works, not even her sisters. Perhaps you will learn after you...well, another time, I shall tell you. What do you think, my Lady?"

What did she think? Lucidity wasn't certain. She did like the outfit in some trivial degree, and it was better than struggling to keep the coat in place with a belt that was designed more for convenience of weapons than helping her retain a measure of dignity after waking up naked. She stared at her reflection with the same sort of detachment that she had been plagued with for hours, which lessened every so often when she was able to turn her focus onto other matters. Yet now it started to plague her once again as she took in the sight of herself. Something was off. Something was different. And it wasn't the missing necklace-which she would have to ask Sesshomaru about-or absence of scars, both of which she'd noticed upon entering the hot springs. No, it was another small detail, one that took her a moment to pinpoint. Yet once she did, she stepped closer to the mirror, until her nose was almost pressed to its smooth surface.

"Something wrong, my dear?"

"My eyes...." she murmured.

"Oh, yes. Your eyes," said Rusuban. "No black centers. The other Guardians are the same. A unique aspect about the East, though, is that her coloring changes with the seasons. I do not know if it will be the same with you, as you are a different sort of breed, but Guardian all the same. We will know by winter, I'm sure, if your hair begins to resemble the palace."

Lucidity peered over at Rusuban. "Different...breed?" she echoed, so slow to wrap her mind around, well, most of everything right now.

The old woman nodded, standing with her hands clasped in front of her. "As I mentioned before, you and the South are different in how you were created. Both of you were born from mortal women and sired by the Mother's essence."

In the rusted cogs of her thoughts, something ground into place. Lucidity stared at Rusuban and felt a new emotion rising to the surface. "What of...what of my father?" she whispered, barely able to think of the words, let alone speak them aloud.

"An instrument of the Mother," was the reply that held no reassurance. "The pairing of your mother and father was essential. A mother to be the vessel of your birth and your first trial. And your father to teach and raise you in the old ways, so that you might know of the Mother and to ensure that your abilities, at least to some extent, were nurtured. He was vital to the Mother's plan, no doubt, but you were not born of him."

The mirror fell to the floor with a resounding crash as Lucidity shoved it away and spun around to fully face the Keeper of the Isle, who spoke so indifferently and with far too much knowledge about her life, about her upbringing. As she stood there, hearing the labored breathing through her own parted lips, the threatening panic threatened ever further. And the shocked confusion on Rusuban's face did nothing to put her at ease. Kind though the woman might be, she was utterly ignorant of what her words had caused. And Lucidity suddenly felt as if she was dangling with one foot over a precipice, wanting, pleading with herself to take that one, final step. 

She fled.

Out of the chambers, right through the window of the alcove, and into the courtyard. She darted beneath the Hahaoya no Shikyu and didn't stop, soon leaving it far behind, along with the palace. No thought, no desire, no purpose guided her across the land or through the trees. She reacted on impulse, on emotion she tried so hard to hold at bay. At one point, she tripped and fell, only to jump back to her feet and bolt again. It was only when she missed a step and collided with a tree that she finally stopped. Granted, she landed on a heap on the ground, having knocked the tree right over, tearing it from its roots. And she lay there, gazing up at the canopy of stars, not wanting to think, not wanting to feel. She had to get away. Somehow, somewhere. Away from all this madness! Where the world made sense again! But how could it ever make sense? How could anything be the same after this? 

Lucidity rolled onto her side. It was too quiet. If she stayed here, alone with her thoughts, she didn't believe she'd ever be able to get up again. Yet she couldn't return to the palace. She wanted off the Isle, to forget about everything that taken place on this god forsaken land. Maybe she should leave. What was tying her here? Rusuban kept saying there was more to learn, but she didn't want to know anything else. Would it be a foolish decision if she did take off, without being told everything first? She didn't know. Hell, she didn't fucking know!  

At a loss, she pushed herself up, staggering for a moment on her feet, then began making her way through the forest at a much slower pace. With nothing but a half moon at best to guide her, she found she was somehow able to easily pick her way through the trees and brush regardless. She saw sights that should not be possible, details in the bark or a branch that hung too low. She ducked beneath said branch, pausing to the study the individual leaves, then looked down at herself for comparison. The pigments of the robe and sash were still distinctive. Colors, shapes, movements. She could see it all. If there had been animals or insects present, she was certain she would be focusing on this newest development in greater earnest. Yet her interest began to wane and she began to wander. Deeper into the forest she went until the trees grew so thick together that she was catching only glimpses of sky. The sound of running water soon reached her ears, but it was a while before she came across the source. Had her hearing improved as well? 

Lucidity stopped when her gaze fell upon a figure resting by a stream, his eyes shut. He'd bathed, she absently noted, both himself and his clothes. There was no more dirt or blood, though tears in his haori and the leg of his hakama were visible. His armor was still missing and his swords lay beside him. And with the mokomoko beneath him, he appeared so slight of build, but no less powerful. As she approached, she realized that her wanderings hadn't been so aimless after all; it was his aura she had subconsciously followed to this spot. Part of her wondered if she should turn back. He'd told her that he didn't want to be followed. Perhaps if she explained what brought her here, he would relent, and hesitantly lowered herself onto her knees a few feet from him. 

"I believe I made it clear that I did not wish to be bothered," were the first words out of his mouth, while his eyes remained closed. 

"I know," she said. "But I couldn't stay at the palace." 

"That does not explain the reason for your intrusion." 

Her hands dug into the material covering her knees as a flush touched her cheeks at the curtness of his words; she felt like an idiot schoolgirl all of a sudden. "I didn't mean to intrude. I wasn't even trying to find you, but-" 

"And yet you are here, against my orders," he interrupted, still without looking at her. "I suggest you leave before I lose patience with you." 

Something cold settled in her chest and swept throughout her body, bringing with it the same dreamlike quality that she'd been struggling against all evening. Suddenly, it was dire for him to understand and she leaned forward on her hands, heart in her throat. "Don't, Sesshomaru. Please...please don't-" 

Golden eyes snapped onto her and the vehement in their depths had her pulling back as if she'd been burned. "I told you to leave, woman," he said. "Seek your solace elsewhere. It is no concern of mine." 

As though the last thread had been severed, she knelt there and gazed at the daiyoukai in a numb silence. Beyond words, beyond tears, she couldn't react. This feeling...there did not seem a proper word for it. It was like a bottomless pit that she was falling through, had no control over. Unable to see or touch or hear. And there was no end to it. There never would be. There was no going back. But how could she go forward? She was so lost, so alone. Irretrievably alone. She really couldn't come back from this. There was...nothing. But something was rising in her throat, something that bubbled to the surface and escaped her mouth. Laughter had never sounded so alien to her ears. Yet that was her laughing. Hunched over, hands covering her mouth, she couldn't stop the sound from slipping out. She knew Sesshomaru was still watching her, perhaps reaching the end of his patience. She didn't care. Gods! She didn't care! 

Not even aware that she had made the decision, Lucidity found herself on her feet to grant Sesshomaru's wish for solitude. She walked into the forest, not so much in a daze this time, but simply with no destination in mind. Alone, she thought. Alone was better. Being alone meant relying on only herself. The moment she began to rely on others, it led to nothing but trouble. And ever since she began to rely on Sesshomaru, ever since he had come to her that day beneath Goshinboku, she had wanted nothing more than to stay at his side. Blindly, against what had remained of her better judgment, she had willingly put herself in his hands, relinquished a sense of control over her own life and given it to him. Like a child ever so trusting of a parent, she'd wanted him to provide that safety and security she'd been so desperate for since her father had passed away. That and more. And worse still! She'd let herself believe it was possible! 

Now she knew. It was too late, but she knew. And good gods! Inuyasha had been right! She'd been completely fucking delusional. Sesshomaru was cold. He was a killer. And he would kill her in one manner or another, or she him. She would actually end up hating him at this rate, she realized. Her feet, still bare, slid to a stop over the grass and she sank to her knees. How could she let this happen? How could she have become so close to him without even considering the likelihood of something like this happening? Because she had believed? Because he had made her believe?! What a fool she'd been! Falling forward onto her hands, she dug her fingers into the moist soil, feeling it give and break, the roots of the grass tearing free. Her breath came in sharp gasps as her stomach churned, as the anger, so sweet and refreshing, swelled. A gust of wind lifted her hair and she gritted her teeth, her surroundings slipping out of focus. She could feel it rising, the fury, the pain, a bitter hate for the Mother that she knew, even now, would consume her. All of it, pushing her over that precipice. The air crackled in her ears. The wind blew harder. She saw the sparks dancing between her fingers, the electricity rising up her arms, felt the charge of power that seized her, and threw her head back in a scream of pure, unadulterated rage.

* * *

"That was cruel, Sesshomaru."

One annoyance had been traded for another as the Keeper of the Isle emerged from the earth. Sesshomaru, having watched Lucidity retreat into the forest, leveled Rusuban a hard look that did nothing to convince her that her safety was in jeopardy. She walked over and gazed down at him with every inch of disapproval that was too maternal for his taste. He closed his eyes and eased back into the fur of the mokomoko.

"I have no interest in indulging her; I am not a source of comfort," he said flatly.

"Hmph! Clearly. And yet my Lady sought you out," Rusuban replied. "She left the palace most distressed; that is the reason I followed her here, should she need help. There was no need for you to treat her so!"

"Idiot hag," he muttered. "She is the offspring of a deity; she has no need for aid or protection."

"Ignorant as well as rude."

His claws twitched as he heard Rusuban come closer.

"Tell me: are your parents proud to have raised such a disappointment?"

Sesshomaru opened his eyes and fixed the Keeper with a molten glare that had sent braver men fleeing for their lives. "Do you have a death wish, old woman?"

Rusuban merely folded her arms. "You obviously do not understand what is at stake here, so allow me to make it clear to you." She took another step forward, then another, until she stood directly over him, her gaze never leaving his. "You have been chosen as the Guardian of the East's Protector. There is only one other and she was chosen for the South. Why do you believe that is?" When he refused to answer, Rusuban continued, her voice growing short with anger. "Think, young man, think! Try and imagine what it must be like for a seemingly ordinary mortal to learn she has a clandestine fate, that her story was written long before her conception. Think of the toll it must take on her. As strong as the Guardians are, do you truly believe they need to be protected in body alone? The South returned to full power centuries ago, but her Protector continued to live at her side. My Lady is still vulnerable, physically, and will be as such until she finds the source of her power. Yet she needs a center. She needs to be kept grounded or she will be lost."

"You claim she will be driven insane?" Even as he spoke the words, the notion was ridiculous to him. At first he wanted nothing more than to dismiss the thought, until he abruptly recalled the image of a booted foot being sent through a pile of burning wood and the woman struggling against his grasp in a fit of grief. He watched Rusuban open her mouth to respond.

And they were both blinded by an explosion of searing light that erupted from the depths of the forest, sending a shock wave through the land that jarred his bones and knocked Rusuban off balance so that she collapsed to her knees. Sesshomaru turned his head away and listened to the sounds of rocks tumbling and trees crashing. When it receded, he opened his eyes, spots dancing in front of his vision, and climbed to his feet. Smoke could be seen rising into the air, in the same direction Lucidity had gone.

"There is your answer!" Rusuban snapped. "Now go clean up your mess!" And then she was gone, melting back into the earth, before Sesshomaru could question her further.

Was it true? As resilient as Lucidity was, was this the one matter she could not endure? He wondered, questioned, then remembered that unexpected, hollow laugh she had given before finally leaving him in peace. She had been pleading with him only moments prior and the sound of her voice, so pathetic with desperation, had been sickening. The strange laughter, the begging, had not been like her. Was Lucidity truly losing her mind? If she was so weak to allow that, then....

Regardless, the thought did not sit well with him. Leaving the swords by the stream, he started into the woods.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, anyone think Sesshomaru will actually fix this or manage to drive Lucidity off that cliff? Honestly, how could anyone's mind remain completely intact after being overloaded with crap like this?


	30. Chapter 30

The crater was wider than it was deeper. The destruction surrounding it spread far with no focus, no direction, no control, with trees that were either uprooted and smoldering or reduced entirely to ash. Had there been animals on the Isle, their carcasses would have added to the devastation. Sesshomaru stood at the edge of the crater, his gaze on Lucidity walking towards him with her eyes downcast. And yet she was oddly composed for one apparently in great distress. There was nothing timid or hesitant in her expression when she lifted her head. Nothing at all. A perfect mask. Her aura was muted, calm, with no hint of threatening fractures or more outbursts of emotion. 

"This was your doing?" he asked when she was nearly level with him. His eyes slid over to her when she came to a stop beside him, but she kept her gaze ahead. 

"That's a stupid question," she said without inflection. "But is it a stupid question to ask what the hell crawled up your ass this time?" 

"The crudeness of your words is unnecessary," he replied, sliding his arms through the sleeves of his haori. What a waste, coming here. It was obvious that Rusuban was a female who possessed the character flaw of overreacting. 

"Perhaps," Lucidity said. "So, are you going to answer my question or not? No, wait.... You explain yourself to no one, right? How could I forget after your pleasant reminder? Silly me." 

"Your sarcasm does not amuse." 

A low chuckle broke from her and he saw a smile spread across her face, the same sort of smile she had once given Inuyasha. "Oh, it's not intended to," she said. "But let me be more blunt: you're a complete and total fucking asshole, Sesshomaru, and you can go straight to the fucking Underworld for all I care." 

He whipped around, hand closing over her upper arm, and turned her sharply to face him. "I tire of the disrespect shown to me by the women of the Isle," he said in a low voice that nonetheless resonated between them. "You will not-" 

The impact of a fist across his face was as unexpected as the strength behind it. Foolish on his part, he realized as he skidded along the ground. She possessed the power of the Sisters. Kasai alone had posed a true threat to the daiyoukai. The damage she had inflicted upon him had been enough to put him at a disadvantage with the undead creature and ultimately worsened his wounds. And now he grappled with Lucidity. She was on him the moment he landed on his back and he felt another blow to his injured shoulder that had him gritting his teeth against the pain. And when he tried to throw her off, he loathed to find that he was unable. She strained against his grip, certainly, but his own strength was depleted, while hers had increased beyond all human measure to rival that of a youkai. The grip of her fingers was bruising while she pinned his arms, leaning over him, hair spilling over her shoulders, as wild as the fury in her eyes. 

"You speak of disrespect," she hissed, words trembling with anger, "after the way you have treated me."  

"Release me, woman," he ordered, his voice as cold as hers was heated. "Before you regret it." 

"I already regret a number of things," she said. "And I'm not going to let you up, not before you tell me what's going on. You _will_ talk to me, Sesshomaru. If you care, at all, you will explain to me why you are acting like more of a callous jerk than usual." 

"You dare-" 

"TELL ME!" 

Her scream was coupled by the smell of salt water. Her eyes began to glisten with more than rage, but no tears fell. He could feel the fingers digging into his arms, felt the fine tremors as she held him in place with her body, a leg on either side of his waist. She had, for now, overpowered him. And yet she still begged. In her own seething way, she was pleading with him, putting what seemed like an ultimatum onto his shoulders in order to force an answer from him. If he cared.... Damn her!

"You have changed in too many ways," he said and immediately she went still, though her grip did not loosen. "Understand for one such as me, scent can be greater than sight, to see through illusions and deceptions. You do not smell as you should. And the potency of your aura could never belong to a human. When I look at you, I question who you are and wish for you to keep your distance until I am able to accept what I see. It is not a simple matter, learning that the human I have claimed is the daughter of a goddess."

"That...that's it?" she whispered. The smell of blood reached his nose when her nails broke through his skin and she suddenly shouted, "THAT'S IT?! A fucking smell? I've just learned that my existence, that my entire fucking life has been fabricated, but you're inconvenienced by a goddamn smell?! You are unbelievable! Kuki was right. I never should have been the one apologizing. You made me feel like shit, made me believe that I wasn't enough. I thought I'd done something wrong because you were so angry, but now I see you're nothing but a coldblooded bastard who doesn't give a damn about anyone!" 

"You idiot, loathsome female!" he snarled.

Only she could do this to him, break his control and bring his temper surging to the surface, and his power along with it. The flare of energy rushed over his skin, filled his wounds, and bled through the whites of his eyes. He could feel his fangs and claws lengthen as he flung her off. And yet she managed to seize the front of his haori and he rolled them over so that she was the one now on her back, yanking her hands from him by the wrists and pinning her down as she had done him.

The scent of her arousal froze him in place as readily as a sword through the chest. His power throbbed and so did she. Trapped beneath him, her eyes blazed with fury, her cheeks flushed, and her breathing was labored, though her lips pressed tight together, as though she was unwilling to make a sound. His gaze flicked down the length of her body as he wondered, briefly, if he was mistaken. Yet the moment he peered back up, the scent heightened and set his teeth on edge. It saturated the air between them. He could taste it on his tongue, more tempting than ever before. Different, like the rest of her. Stronger, like the rest of her. But alluring in a way that was, somehow, still the same. Just as the scent of every campfire was the same no matter where in the country one might travel, and yet the fire that burned in the heart of his territory was the only one that brought a sense of comfort with its familiarity.

"Lucidity," he rumbled in a voice deepened by the energy that continued to churn around him. She shuddered and immediately turned her head away, eyes squeezing shut. His hands moved from her wrists and traveled up her arms as his own desire threatened to rise beyond his control. He could feel the tension in her, but she didn't stop him, didn't so much as move when he drew the sleeves off her shoulders and pulled the material down her arms until she was completely exposed from the waist up. His fingers tightened on her wrists, harder than he would have dared only yesterday, and she inhaled sharply, face contorting with pain, breasts heaving. And still she did nothing. Not even when, in a quick movement, he freed her arms from the robes and brought them above her head, clutching her wrists with one hand. Leaning over her, his face near hers, he forced her legs apart with a knee and slipped his other hand between them. She was wet and swollen and so responsive when he pushed his fingers inside. Her cry was a sharp melody in his ears and her head started to roll in the other direction. His mouth caught hers as he pressed his hand harder against her, lifting her hips, and her body began to squirm beneath his. His need was quickly growing into an agonizing ache. Never had he lusted after another as he did now. Her mouth opened for him as he laid himself on top of her. He felt tongue and teeth, a gentle nip. 

And then pain as her teeth sliced into his bottom lip. He wrenched back with a snarl he couldn't quite suppress, blood dripping down his chin and onto her pale skin below. Her mouth was twisted into a scowl, painted red by his blood, and he knew that her fury with him was far from abated. Even in her current state, she dared to challenge him, words he did not understand spilling from her lips and her knee coming to rest against his stomach, as though seeking to push him away. Still gripping hard on her wrists, power burning through him, he knocked her leg aside and bore down on her. Instincts had been threatening to overwhelm the moment he'd caught her heady scent and now he gave in. His teeth sank into her neck and didn't stop until he tasted blood. She cried out, writhing against him, but it only fueled him to greater heights. With nothing to hold him back, no fragile mortal body to concern himself with, he flipped her onto her stomach and lifted her against him. He had enough presence of mind to never loosen his grip as his other hand moved between them, freeing himself from his hakama and pulling her robes out of the way.

He could feel her shaking, heard her ragged breathing, and another cry tore from her throat as he entered her in a single thrust. The warm tightness of her depths nearly spent him then and there. He molded the length of his body over hers and his teeth found her shoulder as he forced himself to calm. He still clutched her arms with one hand, holding her at an angle to the ground, and she moaned when he began to move. Long, deep strokes that made everything else fall away. He forgot about the Isle, the Sisters, the Guardians, even his own responsibilities as lord of the western lands, and drank in only her. There was nothing but this woman, her taste, her scent, her blood. She was more than before, but it was still her. There was no other person who could undo him so completely. He succumbed to his most base desires, let go in a way he had never allowed until now because he wanted it, wanted her. It was maddening, his craving, his need to claim. He sought to fight and destroy the most powerful beings. And Lucidity, with her lineage, her potential, was no longer the perfect prey, but the ultimate opponent. And he would have her. He would defeat her. 

And he suddenly found it irritating that her clothes still clung to her. With his arm pinning hers to her side, he yanked her upright. Her head fell back on his shoulder and she was a spectacle to watch, lifted as she was by his thrusts, expression strained as if she was trying desperately to stave off the pleasure. And yet her moans were a betrayal, the way her hips twisted, and she gasped at his hand pulling on her robes, his claws unable to cut through the material. But once he found the clasp in back, he quickly loosened the garment and tossed it aside before wrapping his arm around her waist, jerking her back against him, forcing himself deeper. Her voice rang out as his movements became faster, more demanding, and he growled his pleasure into her ear. The harder he moved, the more she responded, the louder she became, and her body became soft and pliable against his. He pushed her back to the ground, one hand on her hip, the other working into her hair, as he laid his body over hers once more. He felt her stiffen and arch, almost daring to pull away it seemed. But he would have her, all of her, and drove himself mercilessly into her depths as the ecstasy rose higher and higher until his mouth clamped down on the nape of her neck in one last, feral display and his fangs pierced deep. With the blood caressing his tongue, he released himself inside her, a bestial snarl in his throat and her voice echoing in his ears. 

Slowly, as though waking from a trance, the daiyoukai's power receded and his mind returned fragment by fragment, like shards of a shattered mirror, until he was finally able to recognize himself and his surroundings. He became aware of the one beneath him, panting and limp, of his teeth still in the back of her neck, and of the gentle spasms around his length that sent mild shocks of pleasure throughout his body. With a soft groan, he drew himself out and retracted his fangs in the same instant. Still keeping a firm grasp on her, he went through the motions of laying the mokomoko on the ground, then himself and Lucidity, to rest on their sides in the fur. Though she remained nude, he had no wish to be exposed longer than necessary and adjusted himself until he was fully covered, then draped his arm over her, his other tucked beneath his head. The day had robbed him of much strength and energy; he would sleep tonight.

And then Lucidity's voice broke the quiet lull in a whisper. "Do you accept who I am now?" 

His arm tightened slightly and he pulled her to him, her back against his chest, and dragged his tongue along the bleeding wound on her nape. "I would not have marked you otherwise." 

"Marked?" 

He closed his eyes and relaxed back into the fur. "The most basic of youkai instinct to claim another, one I never believed I would indulge in." 

"I see," was all she said and they lapsed into another silence that lasted only a short while when she spoke again. "Sesshomaru?" 

His brow furrowed. "I require rest, woman. What is it?" 

"Your acceptance does not make anything right between us," came the cold response. 

His eyes opened at that and he sat up, peering down at her, though she stared resolutely ahead just as before. "Explain yourself." 

Her lip curled and her expression hardened. "Do you expect obedience from me as you do Jaken?" 

"You are not a servant," he replied shortly. "I would never permit a servant to live should one attack me as you have done."

She rolled onto her back and gazed up at him, covered in blood, his seed between her legs, and yet it seemed that if he was to put a hand on her now that he would find her as hard and unyielding as a mountain. "But you still expect me to obey, to bow to your authority like a meek little thing," she said. "You order me as you do any other and disregard me just as well. Perhaps you allow me to get away with more than you would others, but, in the end, you still believe I should be subservient to you." 

"You dare to presume-" 

"Presume?!" she shrieked, pushing herself up onto her hands. "Are you honestly trying to tell me that wasn't an act of dominance? You weren't merely accepting me; you were trying to put me in my place."

Her anger was brilliant in her nudity, an unencumbered and raw display that could infuriate and entice in a single moment. Yet he did not seize her as he found himself wanting to do, but remained where he was, a frown twisting his mouth. "Your place is at my side," he said. "Did you not say you understood the significance of that?"

"That you are not ashamed to have me, human or not," she replied. "That I should be glad of your favor. And I am. By the gods, you have no idea." She shook her head and the smile that unexpectedly graced her lips was bewildering in its sadness. "And therein lies the problem."

"Problem?" he repeated.

She sighed and dropped her gaze, arms folded across her lap. "Prince of youkai, born with a silver spoon in his mouth, you think anyone who catches your attention should be flattered, and that I should feel proud to be so privileged that you have claimed me, that I owe you for favoring me. Whether I was human, youkai, or the damn Mother Herself, that is what you believe and because of that belief you will never see me as your equal, nor can you ever fully respect me. That is why you answer to no one, why you were so cruel when I needed you the most, and even why you marked me. You may care, Sesshomaru, in your own way, but you cannot accept someone who is not subservient to you. And that...that I cannot abide."

She stood and he came to realize that nothing about her had been defeated. Though he had penetrated her body in more than one way, ravaged her until she bled, stripped her of clothes, of control, of choice, she was as stubborn as any proud youkai. In a moment of heated passion, she may have surrendered, but beyond that she would not submit, not to him, not ever. With these thoughts tumbling through his mind and her words echoing in his ears, Sesshomaru stood, gathering the mokomoko over his shoulder, as Lucidity began to dress. Watching her pull on the garments, he wondered at the damage the night had wrought and how or if it might be repaired, but he did not know. Lucidity was the one, now, who could not accept things as they were.

As she secured the robes in place with the silver clasp, her back to Sesshomaru, he heard her speak. "Tell me I'm wrong," she said, and there was an undercurrent of pleading in her tone as she turned to face him. "Look me in the eye and tell me that I'm wrong."

He did not because she was not. She voiced aloud a truth that he had known, but never consciously acknowledged until this moment, and he could not speak against it without his tongue dripping with lies. He held her gaze in a stoic silence and saw a resignation that had the woman lowering her eyes.

"Leave," she ordered.

Claws dug into his palm and he did not move. "Lucidity-"

She stepped away and lifted her head, expression that perfect mask once more. "Unless you can sacrifice this small measure of pride for me, Sesshomaru, I want you to leave, and don't ever come back."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, these two just can't catch a break, can they? Please don't hate me for it! Or for the shortness of this chapter. There was more, but it just didn't fit. And so you all get this nice cliffhanger instead. 
> 
> Important question: is the story dragging for anyone? I feel like it is for some reason. Granted, we're at the point where sharing quite a bit of information is necessary, plus personal reflections from the characters, but I don't want to overdo. I have no one to help me proofread any of this and don't want to end up repeating stuff or drawing it out too much.
> 
> I ask this because the next two chapters are full of info. and some background story on the Isle. I find it interesting, but others might not and I don't want to bore people with unnecessary details.


	31. Chapter 31

The necklace was gone.

It seemed oddly fitting, but also a bit maddening. Lucidity searched every inch of the ceremonial chambers. And by every inch, that meant she actually lifted up every piece of stone in her way in the vain attempt to recover her precious possession. Other than her memories, it was the only thing she had left of home, some small thing of her past. And yet just as had happened when the tablet when she came to learn she could never return to her time, now she had lost the last tie to her father and a life that had been an utter lie. Was that the Mother's way of saying that it was best to forget? But how could she possibly accept and move on, especially when she did not want to?

This was a strange land, the Isle. Unfamiliar, sometimes unnerving. And it was supposed to be hers? She was grateful to find somewhere it was safe for her to be. To not have such an uncertainty hanging over her head anymore was a relief. Yet the price of that security was steep and the days that followed after paying it were little more than a blur. 

Rusuban was there. Rusuban was always there. And in lieu of a certain gaping hole, Lucidity welcomed the old woman's company. Rusuban provided distractions from unpleasant ponderings. She directed Lucidity's attention to the palace and servants. She told of the history of the Isle, of how the Mother had provided little more than the Hahaoya no Shikyu on a scrap of land just large enough for roots to be put down. It was the Guardian who had raised the Isle itself from the depths of the ocean. She was the one who had built the palace, starting with the ceremonial chambers and nothing else. But as her interactions with humans became more frequent, the more she built, taking ideas from different cultures, including those not in her own domain. And eventually, humans were brought to the Isle. Small numbers at first, ones who had no where else to go and were given sanctuary. For some it was a temporary stay. For others, it became home. And the Guardian continued to expand the palace and the Isle itself until the humans constructed their own village and a way to sustain themselves.

It was during this time that Rusuban and the servants were created. Rusuban came from the very life force of the Isle, to oversee it and all the inhabitants in the Guardian's absence. And the servants were, to Lucidity's surprise, once human. More specifically, they were of the humans who first came to the Isle. It had been their wish to serve the Guardian. At the end of their lives when their bodies grew too old and frail, they chose to pledge themselves, for however long they wished. The first time it happened was when a widowed, childless crone, who had lived with the Guardian since she'd been a girl, was on her death bed and wept that she did not wish to leave, that she wanted to remain and be with her always. And the Guardian had granted her wish, offering the woman's body to the Mother through the Hahaoya no Shikyu and asking the Mother that the crone be spared. The body was of no use, but the soul was placed inside a new vessel that emerged from the Hahaoya no Shikyu, an imitation of human form and little else. This vessel retained some portion of the crone's memories and personality, an echo of the one who had known the Guardian in life and the desire to still be of use. No one knew for certain if the Guardian approved of the servant. She had not treated her as warmly as she had the old crone. But it became clear that the servant was useful, tolerable, and soon more offered their afterlives in service to the Guardian, who obliged some, but not all, and never quite gave a reason for her decisions.

The history of the Isle was fascinating to Lucidity, who, if she concentrated enough, could forget the reason why she was here and why she spent nearly every moment with an old woman who resembled the earth. She spent hours listening to Rusuban prattle on about the old days, about how each of the rooms once belonged to not always one person, but sometimes entire families. So much life had filled the halls. The supply of food was endless, resources bountiful, all provided by the Guardian and the Mother. And when the Guardian went off to fight her battles or patrol her domain, absent months at a time, the people worried and prayed for her safe returned. And when she did come back to them, there was always celebration. The East, like the South, had found a niche among mortals and it lasted many generations until, inevitably, that particular mortal caught her eye.

Perhaps the most thrilling aspect of all these history lessons with Rusuban was how these facts came from the Guardian herself. The scrolls and tomes in the Guardian's personal chambers were, as Lucidity came to learn, the Guardian's own journals. And only a small portion at that. The rest of the recordings, at least the ones Rusuban knew about, were kept in the palace library. The library was in the same wing of the palace as the chambers. Enormous it was, taking up two floors, filled with shelves stuffed full of writings. And yet, there was a downside: most of it was in different languages. The Guardians, Rusuban revealed, were fluent in hundreds of languages, both reading and writing. Many of the languages were dead, completely lost to history. There was only a tiny area of the library that Rusuban and Lucidity could pull anything from, which covered the last few centuries of the Guardian's life and was written in the language of this country. Some of the dialect Lucidity did not understand and Rusuban had to translate. But still, what they did find kept them busy every day.

"We're going to run out of things to read soon," Lucidity lamented that afternoon as she perused a corner of a bottom shelf.

"Don't fret," said Rusuban, who was pouring over a scroll and scribbling the translation for Lucidity on another bit of parchment. "You will eventually be able to read everything in here."

Lucidity made an absent noise in the back of her throat. "And how's that? Because I have centuries ahead of me to learn every language in here?"

"Oh, no, you'll have the memories," was the vague response. 

"Come again?" she asked, peering over at the caretaker, completely bemused. 

Rusuban looked up. "What now, my dear?" 

Shaking her head, Lucidity straightened up from where she had been crouching and approached the table Rusuban was sitting at. "Honestly, you're like a forgetful grandmother half the time," she said. "What did you mean that I'll have the memories?" 

Rusuban blinked, and then alarm flickered across her face as she set her calligraphy brush down. "I really said that? Oh dear, I didn't mean to. I know it upsets you to discuss your role as the new Guardian and would rather wait longer, especially if you don't wish to hear anything about the matter yet, given what has happened." 

Lucidity frowned, her gaze dropping to the wet parchment in front of the caretaker. Yes, it did upset her, thinking about the unexpected and unsettling turn her life had taken. She didn't want to face this burden, yet living in ignorance wasn't going to help, not in the long run. Eventually she needed to learn everything, needed to understand. Yet still, she worried about what would happen. What if there was a repeat of the first day, when she had lost control? Only, instead of kicking apart a fire, she had obliterated part of the forest. What if it was worse next time? The only reason she hadn't lost all sense yet was because she detached herself from the concerns, just as she had done when she first arrived to this world and had lived in fear every day that she could never return home. Eventually she had acknowledged that fear and the fact that this era was her home now. She would have to do the same. Here on the Isle, she had to find a way to accept...everything.

Her gaze drifted over to Rusuban, who was quietly studying her, brow wrinkled with worry, before she seated herself at the table in one of the high backed chairs. "Tell me," was all she said. 

"Are you certain?"

"No, but tell me anyway." 

"I...oh, very well, my Lady," Rusuban sighed. "You must be taught sooner or later. Now, I made mention to your protector that you must find the source of your power. Did he advise you of this?" 

Lucidity blinked, then shook her head; they hadn't exactly discussed anything practical that night. 

"I was doubtful of that," continued Rusuban. "Well, anyway, this is something you must do. If you do not, then you will never have the complete power of the Guardian. Your domain will be without the full protection it was once afforded when the former Guardian was still with us. You are a pale comparison of what she was. I apologize for the bluntness, but that is the truth. You are perhaps no more powerful than the youkai who inhabit the land, but closer to one of your protector's stature than the other belly crawling beasts, I should think." 

"So...I'm inadequate," Lucidity muttered, leaning back in the chair. "Figures. But what does this have to do with memories?" 

"Yes, I was getting to that," said Rusuban. "Now, I don't know where or what your power source is. I could not begin to tell you how to go about retrieving it. Yet I can say for certain that when you do this you will truly take on the mantle of the Guardian of the East. And you will also be gifted with the former Guardian's memories. You will know everything that she did, down to the smallest detail of her life if you so wish." 

Lucidity opened her mouth, but it took her a moment to find her voice. Clearing her throat, she tried again. "You're.... Do you mean that I will...become the last Guardian?"

"I'm afraid I can't say for certain," Rusuban replied with a pinched expression of hesitation. "The only one who could tell you such a thing with complete confidence is the South, but she was quite clear on her position with the East. She is not going to help you in any way, shape, or form, not even to give advice. This is something you must do on your own." 

"This is another trial, then?" 

"I believe so. I was instructed to inform you of certain matters by the former Guardian, just enough for you to understand what must be done. I do not know of each trial in detail, but it would not surprise me that this could be your final one." 

Chewing on her lip, Lucidity stared at the table, at her nails, perfect and white and not hers, that scraped along the surface of wood. "What happens if I never find the source?" 

"I don't know," said Rusuban. "I wish I had all the answers for you, my Lady, but I can only give you the pieces. It is imperative, though, that you take up the mantle and accept your duties." 

Lucidity laid her hands flat on the smooth wood and pressed ever so lightly, increasing the pressure bit by bit until she heard a cracking sound and stopped. "Why?" she asked. "Why must I take up the mantle? Why must I be the one? There have to be others out there who are better suited."

"Perhaps, my Lady, but you are the daughter of the Mother. You are the balance. You respect life; it is in your nature." 

She closed her eyes. "I let my father die. He was the only person in this world, in any time, who I have loved and I let him die. How can you say that?" 

"To better understand how precious life is, you must understand how absolute death is in return. Whether there is existence beyond death is irrelevant if you do not appreciate the time you are given here. Did you not learn this when he passed?" 

Her throat constricted and she had to swallowed several times before she could speak. "It was...an abstract thought that I didn't understand until he was gone. It take it that was yet another trial?" 

"A trial, a lesson," answered Rusuban. "My dear, it is your understanding that makes you a fierce protector. You are willing to bring death to those who would take life." 

When Lucidity felt two wrinkled old hands clasp hers, smooth and flawless with youth, she looked up at the caretaker, who was smiling gently at her. 

"That is the role of the Guardian, to preserve this world. There are forces that exist solely to destroy us, to destroy every living thing for the sake of chaos and chaos alone. Is it not a meaningful purpose to stop such forces? It is why you were brought here, after all. And I can feel it, the evil in the earth that you must defeat." 

The rising power, Lucidity thought. She had not forgotten. But like everything else, she had pushed it to the back of her mind. Yet now it came to rushing the surface and she recalled everything that had been said, about how it began when she first arrived, that she was somehow tied to its existence. 

"Did I...did I bring it?" she murmured.

"What? Oh my! Of course not," Rusuban exclaimed, patting her hand. "No, no, you were brought here because of it. This evil, whatever it is, will spread across the land and infect everything it touches. I'm sure there have already been rumors, yes?" 

Lucidity nodded. "Crops failing. People falling sick and dying. Youkai crossing boundaries and threatening to start wars." 

"Ah, yes, that certainly sounds like chaos," said Rusuban. "And, as I mentioned, this was why the Mother wanted you here. This era is without a Guardian. It was predicted by the Mother that you would be needed long before you were to be born. Time is a fickle thing for the great Goddess. It might be used by mortals every so often, the remnants of a tool left behind that can be manipulated, if not fully comprehended, for a short while." 

"Like the Bone Eater's Well?" Lucidity interrupted with a sudden realization. "It was used by friends of mine to cross from this era to the modern day and back again. It's dormant now, but is that what you mean?" 

"Yes, yes, exactly!" said Rusuban, beaming. "I'm not sure what the Bone Eater's Well is, but that sounds accurate. Your friends must have triggered the energy of the well somehow. What a chain of events must have taken place in order for that to be accomplished! So rare it is! But you, my dear, were brought here directly by the Mother, through a conduit." 

"Conduit?" 

"Something that the Mother has linked between centuries, where the veil of Time is thin. Usually mortals have some idea of what this veil is or can at least sense its presence. Are you aware of what-" 

"Goshinboku," said Lucidity. "The conduit is Goshinboku, a sacred tree in the village I was living at. My friend, Kagome, the same who used the well, that tree was at her family's shrine in the modern era. Her husband was pinned to that tree for fifty years and didn't age a day." 

"A powerful conduit indeed. But yes, that is how and why you were brought here," Rusuban finished as she beamed and patted Lucidity's hand again. "To fight and extinguish the evil that has risen." 

Lucidity withdrew her hand and brushed it through her hair. "Where did the evil come from? I mean, why now?" 

"Oh, these things appear every so often," replied Rusuban with a vague shrug. "A few centuries, give or take. Once two millennia passed in peace, but then a horror fell from the sky and impacted the planet. So many animals and plant life were completely eradicated. This was long before my time, of course, but the former Guardian made mention of it every so often. That and the last great extinction which wiped out the largest of the animals during an age of snow and ice. There have been other attacks on much smaller scales. There was once a great flood that killed many, wiped out the most advanced cities and set humans back thousands of years." 

"Wait, wait!" Lucidity said, leaning forward, her eyes bright in a moment of pure excitement. "Are you talking about the great flood of myths? It's found in ancient stories all over the world. You're saying these evil forces caused it? And it.... You mean that humans could have been more advance than they are now if it hadn't been for the floods?"

Rusuban nodded. "Yes. And other catastrophes, too. Most mortals-not just humans-are unwilling to accept that the world is much older than they believe, that history is far greater than can ever be recorded. The Guardians alone contain such knowledge within themselves, but they do not always remember or know everything. As I've said, their interactions with humans have been only a recent development." 

For one wild moment, Lucidity wanted to find the source of the Guardian's power. She wanted to know what there was to know. So many secrets to be revealed. So much knowledge lost to the world that she alone could access. It filled her with an exhilaration that made her feel like a young, giddy child about to embark on a grand adventure. O! To learn such things that her father could never have imagined! All those decades he spent studying the religions of the world, of ancient legends. What he wouldn't have given to get his hands on even just a few of the scrolls Lucidity had been so privileged to read! 

But then the moment passed when Rusuban lifted Lucidity's hand in hers and pressed her forehead to the knuckles. "I pray that you can vanquish the coming evil, my Lady, or this world will be lost. Perhaps a few might survive here on the Isle, but the lands will become one massive graveyard if you are unable to succeed." 

Like prying herself free from the grasp of a sleeping child, Lucidity carefully extracted her hand, the elation draining so fast that it felt more like a fleeting dream to have forgotten, if only for these few seconds, about everything else that was at stake. Part of her wished she could forget completely, to push the worries aside and concern herself with more selfish matters. Yet she couldn't stop herself from thinking about the others on the mainland, the ones back in the village, of a pesky imp and pain in the ass daiyoukai, and of that crazy Seer who had warned her this would happen. Kaidame had told her from the very beginning that if she did not go to the Isle, everyone would be lost. She understood now that this was what he meant, that if she didn't fight this evil of rising power, the death of all would be certain. 

Though she very much wanted to bury her face in her arms, Lucidity chose, instead, to ease back in the chair and let out a heavy sigh. "What must I do?" 

"Prepare yourself, however you can," Rusuban answered. "You may not have the same range of the former Guardian, but there is still power in you. Train with Hogosha-" 

"What?" 

"Hogosha," Rusuban repeated. "The scythe that you pulled from the _lycanthrope_. It was left to you by the Guardian, constructed from the last of her essence as a way to help protect you until you are able to take up her mantle. From my understanding, it will help you focus your power. You would do well to find a proper trainer, someone who has a better grasp on how to weaponize one's energy. Though I'm sure you will be able to harness the abilities through trial and error. Yet do be careful. You may be immortal, but you are still limited, still vulnerable." 

"I can still die," Lucidity said with a sardonic smile. "Just come out and say it. I've died twice already. I don't remember a damn thing from either incident, but there you go."  

"That is not funny, my Lady," rebuked a frowning Rusuban. 

"It's not meant to be," Lucidity said as she rose to her feet. "I think that's enough for today. If there's anything pressing you forgot to tell me, let me know. I'll be in the den." 

"Yes, my Lady." 

Immortality. A source of power. An ultimate battle to be had against an entity of evil that caused death and destruction. Lucidity kept going over everything as she left the library and began to make her way through the palace. Every word Rusuban spoke sounded as if it came from some great myth, as if it was just a story of fantasy that happened to someone else long, long ago in a place that could not exist. Lucidity had trouble imagining, in spite of each bit of evidence pointing to the contrary, that this had anything to do with her. Daughter of a deity, put on the earth to wage war against chaotic forces, who commanded power beyond imagining, while only last week she'd been crushed by a tree and bled to death internally. Yeah, she had a lot of trouble believing with every fiber of her being that this was her life now. It would take a while to adjust, to accept. But she had to try. If what Kaidame and Rusuban both said was the truth, then the ones she cared about were in danger. Even if they wanted nothing to do with her, she wouldn't let anything happen to them if she could help it.

The door of her chambers was open and a fire was crackling in the grate, courtesy of the servants. After shutting the door behind her, Lucidity fell into the nest of furred blankets on couch directly in front of the dancing flames. Drawing her legs up, she wrapped the blankets high around her shoulders and reclined onto her back, eyes on the fire and the fur against her cheek. Sometimes, if she lay still long enough, if she allowed her mind to drift far enough, she could almost trick herself into believing that it was the mokomoko she was resting upon.

Absently, she brought a hand to her neck, felt along the curve of her shoulder, then slid her fingers to her nape. The marks were gone, having healed over completely within the first three days, for which she was grateful to not have a constant reminder. And yet she still touched where he had bitten, reliving the moment again and again. She'd been so furious, almost blindly so, and the anger only fueled her reaction at the sight of those red eyes, the feel of that power riding over her skin. She'd wanted him. She'd given in to him. Tearing his lip open had been...irrational, impulsive, and brought about the response she'd been hoping for. Perhaps she did play games because she'd already known how this one would end. The way it was going, the dawning comprehension of how he perceived her and their relationship, had been it for her. Yet she still wanted him. One last time. 

Fingers scraped over her throat, searching, until she remembered that what she was searching for was no longer there. She sank deeper into the furs, the fire slipping in and out of focus. It would be easier with him here, she knew, and she'd be lying if she said she didn't regret her decision or that she never questioned if she was wrong. If she had him to lean on, the future wouldn't be so daunting. Yet she had gotten along without him before and would do so again, even with Rusuban dropping hints that she needed a proper trainer, also known as the Protector of the Guardian. She rubbed her fingers over the mark on her palm, the only scar that hadn't disappeared. What would happen next time she was in danger, when the mark burned? Would he come running for her or leave her to her fate? It would wound him too deeply to simply return. He would rather die as her superior than live as her equal. This much she understood. And she couldn't go to him. She wouldn't be able to trust herself if she did. If she yielded to him again, knowing his nature, it would only be a matter of time before she hated herself for being so weak and him in return for being so cruel.

* * *

"What the hell are you doing here?!" 

Sesshomaru acknowledged his younger brother with a perfunctory glance before passing him by in silence. Inuyasha, having caught his scent, had bounded out of the village to favor him with this warm greeting that included a hand on the hilt of Tessaiga and many loud words that Sesshomaru did not deign with a response. Predictably, Inuyasha leapt forward to block the path, feet spread and ready for a fight. 

"Move," ordered the daiyoukai. 

"I told you to never come back here," said Inuyasha. 

"You are either a fool or suicidal if you believe you can keep me from the village," Sesshomaru replied, voice rough with a temper that was stirred so effortlessly these days. "Now move!" His knuckles cracked and he lifted an arm, displaying his claws to a scowling hanyou, who unsheathed Tessaiga. "As you wish, then, Inuyasha." 

The great Fang came at him, followed by his brother. A bit of violence should be refreshing. Never did he seek out such lowly opponents. Yet since departing the Isle, he found himself engaging in several one-sided battles that were finished faster than they had begun. Perhaps Inuyasha would provide more of a lasting distraction, but that did not seem likely as he dodged a wide swing and his fist found the face of a shocked hanyou. Thrown to the ground, Inuyasha slid a short distance before finding his feet, hand still clutching tight to Tessaiga. Sesshomaru had to assume, as he moved out of reach of the blade once more, that Inuyasha was unwilling to unleash the full potential of his beloved weapon with their being so close to the village. Or was there a lingering sense of sentimentality for his older brother that stayed his hand? For that matter, why did Sesshomaru stay his hand as well? He had not even removed Bakusaiga from its scabbard. Was it because he wanted the fight to be drawn out, to unleash his anger on this wretch who shared his blood? There was satisfaction to be had when a blow found its way through Inuyasha's guard. Yet there was no lasting alleviation, no matter how many times he knocked Inuyasha to the dirt or forced him back to regain better ground. And here he waited for the next attack, never going on the offensive, and realized he had no true inclination to battle his brother. He was simply...reacting. 

And he tired of it quickly. His mouth pressed into a thin line, his eyes narrowed, and he kept his arms at his sides as Inuyasha charged at him again. At the very last moment, when it dawned on Inuyasha that Sesshomaru had no intention of moving, the Tessaiga arched high, wavered, and dropped beside the daiyoukai, the blade landing heavily on the ground. Sesshomaru felt the brush of it against his sleeve as he stared into the stunned gaze of the hanyou, whose mouth was wide open and, for once, was unable to find his voice. 

"Enough of this, Inuyasha," Sesshomaru said. "You have no intention of killing me, nor can you stop me." 

"Are you crazy?!" Inuyasha shouted, lifting Tessaiga and stepping back. "And you say I have a death wish. What the hell is wrong with you?" 

"I have no interest indulging you in your childish antics," Sesshomaru said as he brushed past Inuyasha, who moved aside this time, still gaping incredulously. "I will kill you on another day if you insist on challenging me."

The sound of Tessaiga being sheathed reached his ears, along with, much to his annoyance, Inuyasha's following footsteps. "Look, I still don't want you here, Sesshomaru, but what's going on with you? You never drop your guard like that." 

"Living with humans has made you soft, hanyou," the daiyoukai replied as they reached the first huts of the village. "Your prattle on like your woman." 

"Stuff it, asshole," growled Inuyasha, falling into step beside him, arms folded tight within the sleeves of his haori. "And where's yours, anyway?" 

Claws bit into his palm at the inevitable broach of topic. "She was never mine."

"Keh, whatever. I know what I walked in on, you hypocritical bastard. After spouting all that crap about me and my mother, I never thought that you of all youkai would go sniffing around a human." 

The smirk Sesshomaru saw out of the corner of his eye was mocking and boastful and had his claws clicking together as he reconsidered killing Inuyasha today rather than waiting. Yet the impulse would serve no purpose and he continued on through the village, the humans giving him a wide berth when they spotted him coming down the path. 

"Seriously, though, where is she? With you here, Sango and Kagome are going to want to know," Inuyasha said, still keeping pace with him.

Sesshomaru didn't answer. Eventually, he might reveal what took place on the Isle, in part, if only to put an end to the insistent questioning. Yet he was far from willing to discuss anything which dealt with that woman. It was doubtful he would even tell Rin. But when it became clear that no reply was forthcoming, Inuyasha darted forward and blocked Sesshomaru's progress once again. This time, however, Inuyasha looked agitated rather than furious. 

"Where is she, Sesshomaru?" he demanded. "Is that why you've come back?" 

"If she was dead, I would have informed you from the beginning," Sesshomaru said, feeling a frown tug at his mouth. "Now get out of my way." 

Inuyasha snorted, but resumed his pace, walking ahead a short distance. "I guess she's the only one who has sense enough to listen when told to stay away." 

"Idiot hanyou," said Sesshomaru. "She maintains her distance to keep the village safe from the shogun, not because she tricked you into exiling her."

Inuyasha stumbled to a halt and jerked around, eyes wide. "What are you talking about? She openly admitted to killing people to get you off the hook."

"Her interference on my behalf was not necessary," replied the daiyoukai as he passed his brother once more. "She was putting a stop to your foolishness that would have endangered the entire village."

"Then...." came the hesitant voice from behind him. "She didn't actually kill anyone?"

"She did what was necessary to survive, but she took no pleasure in it as she led you to believe."

"Shit," muttered Inuyasha, and that was the end of it.

The two brothers did not say another word to each other as they walked through the village together. Sesshomaru remained indifferent to the hanyou's presence. He was aware that Inuyasha remained in an effort to show that he had some control over his older brother, when the reality of the matter was quite different. Even after all these years, the villagers had never grown accustomed to the daiyoukai, who had no intention of altering any misconceptions. It was doubtful, though, that their fear was actually derived from any misconceptions, but rather well placed concerns, considering what happened to the village of the shogun. Sesshomaru watched one human after another move off the path, duck back inside their homes, or, in the case of one particular farmer, send a cart of fruit tumbling down the short incline they were on as an excuse to run away. Yet as the man sprinted after his goods, one particular human ran forward, arms outstretched, and expression filled with elated joy.

"Sesshomaru-sama! Sesshomaru-sama!"

"Hello, Rin," said the daiyoukai as he and girl came to a stop in front of one another, with a hanyou standing off to the side.

Rin pressed the knuckles of both her hands to her mouth, rocking back and forth on her feet. The tears in her eyes were a bit bemusing, at least until she spoke. "I was so worried you weren't ever going to visit again. Inuyasha told us what happened with the shogun. But the shogun has been so horrible and.... And I'm just so glad you're back, Sesshomaru-sama!"

Inuyasha scoffed. "I'll never get your insane attachment to this creep of all people, Rin. Just don't make me come looking for you if you go off with him." 

"Yes, Inuyasha," said Rin obediently, but he was already walking away.

"And don't get too comfortable here, Sesshomaru," Inuyasha called over his shoulder. "I want you out of here before I start getting gray hair."

"But...Inuyasha's hair is silver," muttered Rin. "That's kind of like gray, right Sesshomaru-sama? Does that mean he doesn't want you to stay?"

"I believe that is his meaning," replied the daiyoukai as he began making the trek back through the village, this time with more tolerable company in tow.

"But you're still staying?"

"Yes."

Rin cheered and dashed forward to walk next to him, a bundle of energy that stopped shy from grabbing onto him. "Where are we going?"

"Jaken and Ah-Un wait outside the village."

"Is Lucidity with them? We've been really worried about her. It isn't safe for gaijin anymore, but I know she's safe with you, Sesshomaru-sama. Sango and Kagome will be happy to see her again."

Sesshomaru fought the urge to heave a sigh as he closed his eyes, taking a moment, before he resigned himself to answer the question.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. Lotta information in this chapter. I hope it wasn't too much. And it looks like we have a melancholy youkai lord. It's when a dog doesn't eat that you have to worry. Or, in Sesshy's case, doesn't want to fight.


	32. Chapter 32

The full moon, just beginning to wane, drifted overhead in the night sky and illuminated the trickling water of the stream that Sesshomaru watched in silent contemplation, reclined as he was against a tree beside the bank. Ah-Un and Jaken slept soundly nearby and Rin had left several hours ago with the women. As Inuyasha had predicted, the priestess and daemon slayer had come to him seeking information on their friend and had been disheartened to learn that Sesshomaru could not provide all the answers they wished to hear, other than she lived. She would not be returning, as far as he knew, and he begrudgingly admitted as much when asked. When the women questioned him further about what she was doing and why she was not traveling with him, he had not responded and, in the end, ordered them to leave him in peace. The priestess had nearly persisted, but whether it had been his cold glare or the hand the daemon slayer put on her shoulder, she refrained and, instead, offered to take Rin back to the village under the dying light of the sunset. He did not believe this was over, just as he believed he would one day provide an answer, given that Inuyasha and his horde did not seek it for themselves. 

Sesshomaru had been well aware that returning to the village meant facing these questions. Yet he had, for some semblance of normalcy and routine. When he left from here, he would continue as if nothing had changed. He would hunt down the last of the Viper Clan and discover what had driven them from their home. This rising power needed to be contended with and he would do so alone, as he had always done. It was a threat to his territory and he should have focused on it long before now, tied though it was to the Guardian and the Isle. What it had to do with Lucidity, he wasn't certain. Yet they had done as Kaidame had instructed and gone to the Isle. He had to assume that her being gifted with the power of the Four Sisters was a means to defeat the approaching enemy; however, he would let her deal with the matter as she saw fit and he would do the same. What other choice was there? What other choice had she left him? 

Without thought, Sesshomaru reached into the folds of his haori and extracted a thread of silver. 

The necklace was weightless in the palm of his hand. With the chain tangled around his fingers, the pendant rested on the grooves of the seven-pointed star that still marred his skin. With the exception of the temporary loss of his left arm, the Mother's mark was the only scar to ever grace his body. It would serve as a constant reminder of how mere weeks in the company of one he'd believed to be human had almost managed to destroy him completely. Clearly allowing one person close to him made it easier for others to worm their ways into his life like parasites. He should never have let it escalate to such a point. That he had taken her at all was a sign that he had grown too soft. She caused him to forget his priorities, his duties, even his goal to conquer and build his own empire. In the months that he had known her, he'd cast aside everything else. And for what? For the madness that was the female of any species? And which left him staring at a piece of silver he wasn't certain what to do with. The simple oversight of returning this small item was causing him unnecessary turmoil. He did not like having it on his person, but would not go back to the Isle, not for any reason; and nor could he bring himself to merely toss the necklace aside. It had held great importance to her. As much as he despised her, he would not throw her father's gift away. 

He paused. Did he despise her? He was furious with her, yes, but could he say that he hated her? His fingers closed over the necklace as he propped his elbow against the knee he had drawn up. Chin resting on top of his fist, he glared at the shimmering surface of the stream, which brought to mind the surface of a different body of water that had glowed by less natural means. His eyes fell shut as he turned the pendant between his fingers, more than familiar with the contours of its shape, while he considered, again, if he actually did hate Lucidity for what she'd done. 

She'd humiliated him, gravely so, with her rejection after he had marked her. Of all the actions he could have taken that night, he had succumbed to the ultimate weakness of his desire and claimed her like the idiot mutt in heat he'd been. And she had turned him away in the end. It was, perhaps, the most impulsive act he had ever committed and led to one of his greatest moments of shame; the only comparison he had was in his defeat at Inuyasha's hands. Yet she had spoken the truth. Of that, he could not deny. How could he fault her for the truth?

And even if he hadn't marked her, he still could not do what she asked. He would not submit; it wasn't in his nature. Even if this outcome was not what he wanted, he would not ask her to compromise. He would not...beg. For that was what she demanded of him, his submission to her will. He was an arrogant and prideful daiyoukai, of which she was well aware. That was the reason for her ultimatum, because she knew that neither of them was willing to bow to the other. He could not give her what she wanted, would not tolerate what she demanded. She had rejected him and expected him to beg in return. He refused and leaving her as she so wished was the price to pay, in spite of how he loathed the decision. 

He felt the scowl that marred his mouth as his claws raked over the necklace, which still carried traces of her scent. Damn that woman! He still wanted her. That was the cold, hard reality. She had scorned him, but the thought of her continued to plague him. A constant, irritating distraction. How could she make such a demand of him? Why demand his respect in such a manner, to sacrifice his pride for her? How could she expect...? And why did he not? Had he not risked his life against the Sisters for her? Had he not been indifferent to his own death if it meant that she survived? He was willing to sacrifice his life, but not his pride, to die with honor rather than live in shame...and then leave her vulnerable as a result. Was he as Kasai had predicted? He must be, to break his word to the Sisters, to refuse to protect the woman he had mourned for. And now that she was alive, he could not bring himself to return to her, all because he could not lose face. 

She had done this, reduced him to a pathetic ruin who doubted himself, second guessed his decisions, of what priorities held significance. As aggravating and infuriating as she was, even a source of shame to him at times, he knew didn't hate her. He didn't believe it was possible. And again, he considered the reasons she had for driving him from the Isle, of the reasons he had for keeping his distance, and realized that venturing to the Underworld with little hope of escape was a much easier decision to make.

* * *

Lucidity rolled to a stop in the grass near the base of the mountain, on purpose this time. Yeah, she was fairly certain she had the hang of this now. Laying on her back, she stared up at the sky, which was growing steadily lighter with the coming dawn. Scattered stars remained overhead and she studied the familiar patterns and constellations whose names she didn't really know and only vaguely recognized. The moon was only beginning to peek out again, a sharply curved crescent that smiled or frowned, depending on one's point of view. Lucidity tilted her head, gazing up at the white curve painted against the darkness, and came to the conclusion that she didn't know which one it was to her. She'd been on this Isle for nearly a month now, alone with Rusuban and the servants, the latter of whom did not provide much company, but damned if they didn't make her feel spoiled. 

Hours, days, weeks it had been since she'd had that discussion with Rusuban and she'd been preparing, just as the old woman advised. Preparing and training as well as anyone who was alone could do so. But there was much to train herself on, much she didn't understand or know about her own body or power. For instance, on the very first day, she'd managed to blast apart a section of the mountain with Hogosha large enough that she was promptly buried beneath the rubble. It had taken only a few minutes of clawing at the rock to dig herself out, but after that she was a bit more hesitant to use the weapon; at least she had had the sense to train on the other side of the Isle where she was not in danger of hurting anyone else. 

Drawing on her energy wasn't so different from techniques her father had taught her when she'd been a small child, albeit ones she barely remembered. She hadn't practiced as he did and her understanding was very basic, mostly in retaining the ability to sense the energies she worked with. And now it was as if the universe was expecting her to get back on a bicycle and participate in a race the very next day. Yet she had nothing else to do other than occupy herself in the library. She didn't sleep. She didn't eat. And other than Rusuban, there was no one here to really talk to. Whenever she attempted to with the servants, they skittered about and found some reason or other to excuse themselves. After this happened three times, she stopped making any effort and focused solely on training.

All day, all night, until hours became days and days became weeks and she was starting to doubt that she would make much more progress. There was simply nothing to challenge her, nothing to bring out the secret inner workings of whatever power lay dormant. That first night with the crater had been a fluke, completely out of her control, and she couldn't let that happen again. At this rate, she was going to have to take a page out of Sesshomaru's book: test the full range of abilities against an enemy. Most of what she had managed to learn so far was from reaction alone, like when she decided to race down the mountain in an effort to test speed and strength and.... Shit, who was she kidding? She just wanted to run, put a bit of an edge, some danger into it, which had triggered a most unexpected response when the lay of the mountain had grown steeper, more hazardous.

Turning her gaze from the moon, Lucidity lifted a hand in front of her face and flexed her fingers, over and over, and then released that hold inside her. She could think of no other way to describe the sensation, other than she simply let go, as if she had been clinging tight her whole life a single idea until her world was upended with a flood of thoughts that needed an outlet. Her hand dissolved, followed by her arm, shoulder, and finally her entire body, into a soft current of wind that traveled along the ground and through the forest. She was still her, still retained her consciousness, her awareness of self or whatever one might call it. Yet she was different. On some level beyond the physical one, she had changed. She could feel the molecules in the air, the leaves on the trees, and even the tiny crevices of the bark. Sight was still hers more than it had ever been before. She was able to see with a greater capacity she could have ever imagined. Behind, in front, on every side she could see simultaneously, but at the same time she was not overloaded with information. In an instant, she collected and comprehended it and was able to move on. 

On the steps of the veranda, Lucidity gathered herself until she had solid feet upon the ground. She shook her hair out and made her way into the palace. For the most part, she'd become accustomed to being incorporeal. It had been a rough shock, the first several experiences she'd had. But by now she had spent so often-days in fact-as nothing more than wisps of air that she was beginning to feel that having limbs and organs and physical limitations overall quite bothersome, which was not good. She couldn't forget what or who she was, why she was training, or what she needed to do. Being here on the Isle with no one but the household staff for company was going to make her crazy. 

And that was the reason, later in the morning, that Lucidity went to her chambers, thoroughly bathed, to dress into something that wasn't casual robes. Earlier she had asked the servants to bring her clothes that the former Guardian had worn for patrols or battle and discovered, upon her return from the hot springs, that the bed had been piled so high that some pieces had fallen onto the floor. There were styles from different centuries, different countries, and she stared at the mess for several minutes before she finally began to dig through it. No armor, though, as she had expected. Everything was made from the strange, impenetrable material as the robes she'd been wearing around the palace. And though she had numerous options at hand, she chose something familiar, which was how she ended up with leggings, a dress-like tunic that had long sleeves and reached just above her knees, and a pair of boots. All form fitting to allow for easy movement in battle and, oddly, all black and would not have been out of place in modern times.

Lucidity was standing in front of the full length mirror, which had replaced the one she'd broken, and was tying her hair into a loose braid over her shoulder when she caught sight of Rusuban's reflection upon the old woman entering the bedroom. Rusuban took one look at her and froze.

"You're leaving?" she asked.

"You sound surprised," Lucidity replied.

"No, I.... Well, yes," Rusuban admitted. "I did not expect you to set off so soon. You haven't been here very long."

"It's been almost a month," said Lucidity as she tied the end of the braid with a piece of string, then went to the pile of clothes. Rusuban followed, forehead more wrinkled than usual, and hovered nearby while Lucidity searched through the many garments until she found a rare piece of leather and extracted it from the endless depths that was a frequent shopper's wet dream. "What's on your mind, Rusuban?" she asked, buckling the belt around her waist.

"I worry, my Lady," the old woman answered. "I won't stop you, but I fear that your decision might be hasty. You need more time to practice with these new abilities of yours."

"What I need is stimulation," Lucidity said. "There's only so much I can learn on my own. Besides, I'm going stir crazy; I need to get out of here for a while. And how else am I going to find any source of power if I'm cooped up on a bit of land that no one else can reach?"

"Fair point," sighed Rusuban and, again, followed her across the room when she went to retrieve the sword and Hogosha from the table, though the dagger remained untouched. "Where do you plan on going?"

Lucidity slid the scabbard through the belt, then picked up Hogosha, deceiving in its small, thin appearance. Turning it over in her fingers, she glanced at Rusuban. "Not sure, exactly. I figured I'd look for signs of this rising power."

"That will take some time."

"Time is all I have now."

A leather pouch rested on the table. Lucidity had had it made a few days ago. It was roughly the same width as Hogosha, though not as long. The weapon in its sealed form fit perfectly inside, looking no more threatening than the flute it resembled. The strings on the pouch made the task of tying it to the belt a simple one. And that was it. She needed nothing else. No food to pack. No medicine to make. No journals, no ink, no quills. Nothing but the clothes on her back. She didn't even need to worry about a place to sleep. In all matters pertaining to physical and safety concerns, there was nothing to worry about. She could only hope that the lack of company would not bother her too much. 

"If you find yourself in danger or badly wounded, you should return here at once," Rusuban was saying, dragging Lucidity out of her thoughts. She frowned at the old caretaker, who merely smiled in response. "There is an easier way to go about getting back to the Isle, I'll have you know. There is no need to wander up and down the countryside, searching for the passage. Would you like me to tell you how?"

Lucidity raised a brow. "No. No, I thought I'd just stand around and twiddle my thumbs until I figure out this mystery on my own."

"Don't be so rude, my dear, or you will do just that," came the reprimand, complete with a disapproving click of the tongue and everything.

Lucidity threw up her hands. "You would honestly leave me to die? What sort of friend do you call yourself? Fine, fine, tell me. I'd be most grateful for it."

Rusuban chuckled. "That's better. Now, let's see...."

* * *

Humans. 

She wasn't one of them anymore, but she sure as shit still felt like it. Though her days were filled with reminders of how different everything was, Lucidity was aware that she had not fully come to understand what this meant and part of her didn't want to, because once she understood, the less human she would be. She wasn't ready for that, wasn't ready to take on the mantle of Guardian or any sort of evil power threatening the land. But she had to. She needed to find some sort of direction. Otherwise, what was the point? As much as it frightened her, she would much rather stare Death in the face than waste away alone on an island. Not to mention, more than her sanity was at stake. 

Several days it had been and her wanderings had yielded little. Some low class youkai here or there that were not much of a challenge, even without Hogosha. Yet recalling the difficulty she had had with those daemonic birds and, before that, a couple of men, it had been thrilling to witness firsthand how far she had come. Eventually it might get boring, but she would enjoy it while she could. Other than that, her travels had been quiet. The villages she came upon didn't hold anything of interest; however, she did spend several hours simply drifting through homes, insubstantial and nothing more than a light breeze to the people, merely for the sake of the experience alone. She even sought out the castle of a lord because she had never dared to set foot in one before now. Technically, she still didn't set foot on solid ground, but she did observe the life of nobles without fear. For once, she was able to enjoy herself while caught up in a group of strangers who would probably try to kill her on sight. 

Part of her entertained the idea of interacting with the nobles, curious how their manners differed from those of the common people. Yet she dismissed the idea just as quickly. Perhaps another time, when she didn't have the priority of a big bad lurking over her head. She never stopped to speak with anyone. She was a gaijin, first and foremost, and it wasn't worth the risk to reveal herself to anyone as far as she was concerned.

And that was the reason she hesitated when she came across the family in the road. On any other day, she would just pass them by. Yet it was a little difficult to ignore the bandits that were currently looting their cart. The family seemed well off with their clean-cut and colorful attire, beasts of burden, and the endless supply of possessions that these less than savory men were unloading. Five men in all, filthy and haggard and smelling to high heaven, while the family cowered off to the side, kept in place by two of the bandits. Lucidity considered the husband and wife who were pleading, saying that everything they owned was in that cart, their very livelihood, and so on, but their pleas fell on deaf ears. Well, not entirely deaf, as the husband was struck upside the head and knocked to the ground, bringing screams from the wife and daughter. Lucidity probably would have moved on, not too keen on getting involved with nothing more than simple thievery, if the men hadn't turned their sights on the women. It was the daughter they seized first, a girl hardly more than fifteen. One of the men threw her over his shoulder and she cried and pounded his back while he carried her down the path, her parents shouting and begging for her to be spared. And then another man grabbed the wife. 

Lucidity's hand was the first thing to materialize as it closed over the throat of bandit who held the girl. In a sharp, wrenching movement, she broke his neck before he could completely comprehend what he was seeing. His body crumpled, with the girl crying and rolling out of the limp grasp. The only one to have a clear view of what just happened was the man standing directly behind his comrade, the woman slung over his shoulder, whom he dropped most unceremoniously before drawing his sword. Lucidity had hers out and struck before he could even prepare himself. The mother scrambled to reach her daughter while Lucidity approached the last three, two of whom were struggling with the grappling father and the other still going through the cart. 

There was no challenge. Absolutely none. Like picking ants off her sleeve, there was little for her to do other than to decide if she wanted to crush them with a finger or flick them away without caring whether the impact killed the little bastards or not. By the time the remaining bandits realized what was going on, it was too late. Lucidity allowed weapons to be drawn, some blows to be exchanged, but in an effort to keep from frightening the family, not to entertain herself with giving the men a "fighting chance." In the end, their deaths were quick and she was wiping the blade of her sword clean after the last one fell. The family was huddled together once more next to their cart, watching her in silence as she sheathed the sword, their faces mirrors of shock and fear and what seemed to be a creeping sense of relief. She could see some of the tension draining from the parents as they hugged their girl between them. Part of Lucidity was tempted to speak, to ask the mandatory question if they were all right, but considered it rather ridiculous given what had happened. And since smiling seemed to be in poor taste, she simply inclined her head and turned to leave. 

"Gaijin." 

She looked back at the husband who had spoken. He stepped away from his wife and daughter, peering around at the bodies that littered the ground, then back at her. To her astonishment, he bowed. Not a brief nod, but a decent bend at the waist that, to her, expressed greater gratitude than mere words. 

"You have my sincere thanks, gaijin," the man said upon straightening. "I'm afraid to imagine what would have happened to my family if you hadn't come by." 

"Yes, thank you," said his wife as she moved closer, her daughter a step or two behind her. "And please know that we will tell no one that we saw you. The samurai are without mercy when it comes to your people." 

"What are you doing out here by yourself?" asked the daughter. "It's not safe." 

"I think she is capable of looking after herself, Aika," said her father with a slight frown and the girl blushed and nodded. He looked back at Lucidity and his frown deepened. "Do you understand us, gaijin?" 

"I understand," Lucidity replied. "And stop calling me that." 

"What would have us call you?" he asked. 

She thought for a moment, then shook her head. "Nothing. It's of no importance. Try and stay safe from now on." She attempted to leave again, but stopped when the wife called out. 

"Wait, wait! Let us give you something in return. I see you have no food or water. I can offer you some of ours or coin to buy your own? Please, it's the least we can do." 

"No, thank you," said Lucidity. "Keep what you have; I don't need it." 

"There must be something we can do," the woman insisted. "Something that you need."

Lucidity shook her head. 

"At the very least, some sound advice," said the husband. "Do not travel in the direction that we came; it isn't safe." 

Now that had her attention. "Why? What happened?" 

"The land has been poisoned," he explained. "People have been leaving because there isn't enough food and the river is starting to run dry. Worse still, many of the villagers have become ill from the poison." 

"It's getting bad," added Aika. "Some of the people who are sick started losing their minds and attacked their own families." 

"We left days ago," said her mother. "We don't know what's become of the village by now, if things are better or worse, but you should stay clear." 

Lucidity peered from one earnest face to the next, a hand absently reaching up to grip Hogosha. "Where is your village?"


	33. Chapter 33

There was a difference between seeing and hearing, such as listening to someone describe the plot of a movie and then watching it for yourself or going to the vacation spot your friends were always talking about. Or, in Lucidity's experience, hearing the screams of people pleading for help over the phone. It had been a long, long time since she had given any thought to the job she'd held right after turning eighteen. And, in all honesty, most calls were fairly routine. Car accidents, shoplifting, vehicle break-ins. And those of the domestic sort were so frequent that it didn't take more than a couple months to get accustomed to everything. Not to mention, most of the time it was verbal arguments that may or may not escalate into something physical. The bad calls, the really bad ones that made the news or circulated the internet for years, the ones where girls screamed that they had been shot and were dying, the ones that gave people nightmares, were few and far in-between.

But in the nearly four years that Lucidity worked in emergency services, she had had her fair share, including one of her callers being murdered when he tried to save a woman from her attacker. But Lucidity had never really been witness to a devastating scene. The samurai Sesshomaru had cut down had been willing to fight, willing to die, and Sesshomaru had seen to each one with a sort of measured calculation. There had been control, albeit of a brutal and lethal nature. Never had Lucidity been able to see for herself the chaotic madness that was death and destruction.

Until now.

Reluctant though he had been, the man had eventually given her directions. Nestled like a child inside a mountain range, the village was further north than she had ever traveled with Sesshomaru. It would have taken nearly a week to reach if she had journeyed on foot or even by horse. But it was two days. Two days of drifting on the currents without stopping that brought her upon the horrific scene in the late hours of the morning. The family she had met were more fortunate than she realized. The very first thing she came across were bodies. Both of people and animals, scattered about the land like grotesque decorations. The worst part was the fact that these were pieces. Every where she looked, she could not see a single corpse that was completely intact. Arms, feet, hands, heads, torsos. And blood. So much blood. The ground was dark with it. The buzzing of insects was everywhere and the stench had her walking through the lands with a hand over her nose and mouth. She wanted to turn right back around and let someone else deal with this mess. Yet she forced herself to continue, one foot in front of the other and all that bullshit.

At one point, she stopped and crouched down in front of the head and torso of a young woman. It was the largest body part she had spotted so far. What was left of the woman's face was frozen in terror. Flies crawled over white, sightless eyes and dried lips had pulled back over her teeth. The rest of her had been torn apart and eaten. Lucidity could see the teeth marks in the flesh and felt the knots twisting in her stomach. She was no expert, but those definitely looked human, not animal. 

"What the fuck?" she whispered into the silence.

And it really was terribly silent. Nothing had been spared, not even what appeared to be a dog laying in the entrance of a hut. The further she ventured into the village, the more signs of devastation she found. More bodies. Correction: more pieces of bodies, which were becoming less and less easier to identify. And a new smell reached her nose, the source of which was easy to find at the center of the village. A pile of charred, human remains was fresher than some of the corpses, considering that part of it was still smoking. She noticed, upon closer inspection, that though some had been burnt to the bone, these bodies were whole. Over and over, she wondered what had happened here, what horrific event had taken place. How had poisoned land and people going mad from disease escalated into this apocalyptic scene before her?

The answer, to her astonishment, made itself known.

She saw it before it saw her. Shuffling upon two feet, something clasped between its hands, the hollow shell of what had once been a man made its way out from behind one of the larger storage buildings. Black veins spider-webbed their way over what she could see of its arms and neck and parts of the face. Vacant eyes peered over the bits of spine sticking out from the severed head it was chewing on, neck first. When it saw her, however, the head slipped from its grasp and landed on the ground, bouncing to a stop. Lucidity gazed at another fear-frozen face of an older man, with the blood still leaking from the torn flesh; he'd only recently died. She could only conclude that the man, whoever he'd been, had been burning the things responsible for the carnage and clearly hadn't done a thorough sweep.

As the once-human creature sprang for her, sprinting faster than she had expected, she drew her sword and wondered if there was anyone else still around. This was too much work for just one person. Or had it been a communal effort and only these two remained? So many questions and she was doubtful this thing would be able to give her any answers. It charged at her with single-minded determination and snarled when she thrust the sword into its chest. Acting like a worm on a hook, it flailed as she brought it down and drove the blade into the ground to pin it in place. It completely ignored the weapon, but reached for her, fingers spread like claws. She grabbed the wrist of the nearest arm and was surprised to find the skin warm to the touch. And when she put a hand to the chest, she could feel the heartbeat. Just what the bloody hell? She'd been expecting something more like from Dawn of the Dead.

Blood was pooling out of the wound, but the thing continued to writhe, paying no mind to anything other than trying to take a bite out of Lucidity's arm. And as if the situation couldn't have become more bizarre, it began to froth at the mouth. Black froth that bubbled around the lips before suddenly beginning to gush, as though a slit had been made somewhere inside to let the strange, dark liquid free at this precise moment. The substance was thicker than blood, almost like tar, and the smell was about as pleasant as a bloated carcass baking under the heat of a summer sun. As she watched, the arm in her grasp stiffened and the thing started to shake, the head whipping back and forth. She let go and yanked the sword out, stepping back, as the thing went into a full seizure. A choking sound filled the air as it twisted and writhed, arms outstretched and rigid as the limbs of a tree, feet kicking. The black tar spewed from its mouth when it jerked upright, only to slam back into the dirt, back arching, hands twitching in front of its chest. And then it went completely and utterly limp.

Lucidity stared down at the thing, at the emptiness growing in the eyes, the same as she had seen in the face of the first man she'd killed. Whatever had happened to this thing, this...man, she didn't know. But she now realized he really had been alive until this moment. Incredibly ill, beyond help, but alive all the same. Alive and devouring his own people. A trembling hand came to her lips, covering her mouth, as the full impact of what had happened to the villagers struck her.

It took a little while, but she eventually regained the presence of mind to clean off the blade of her sword and return it to the scabbard. She double checked that the man was, indeed, dead, by giving him several nudges with her foot before crouching down to feel for a pulse, being careful not to touch any of the blackness. Yeah, definitely deceased. She glanced at the burnt bodies and wondered if the villagers were just being thorough, using the fire to purify a disease they didn't understand. Of course, she didn't understand what was happening either. Why hadn't she heard about anything like this before? There had only been rumors about sickness and a bad harvest, but nothing to such a degree as what she witnessed here.

Anxious and uncertain, she continued to search the village, hoping to find any signs of life. And she did locate the people who had been helping the severed head guy; what was left of them, actually, along with the infected who had killed and eaten them. And, like the first, they were all dead, mouths covered in the tar-like substance. It didn't sit well with her, just leaving the bodies out like this. If the disease did spread somehow through touch or ingestion or however, she didn't want to risk it spreading. After gathering logs from several wood piles through the village, and even tearing down a hut, she spent the rest of the morning and better part of the afternoon building pyres and locating the remains of all the victims and infected. So many bodies. So many pieces. Men, women, children. It was gut-wrenching, heartbreaking work that somehow managed to become tedious. Yet she still desperately wanted to find a hot spring and soak for a good, long while after this.

Hours it took. Even with her strength and speed, she still needed to scour every area of the village and the surrounding parts until she satisfied herself that she'd found everything that needed to be found. In the end, she loaded the pyres with the remains of the villagers and stood vigilant for a moment, torch in hand from a fire she had made, before she went down the very long line and lit each one in turn, counting as she went. Though she could not be certain of an exact amount, she had made a conscious effort of building each pyre larger than normal, so that several bodies, perhaps four or five on each, could be burnt at once.

By the time she was done and tossed the torch onto the last one, she had counted forty-two pyres. A rough calculation had her storming away from the flames that were burning bright and hot, smoke rising high into the air. Her stomach churned as fists clenched at her sides. This was the doing of the rising power and something she should have dealt with sooner. If she wasn't so wrapped up in her own head, maybe she could have stopped this. But...gods, what could she do?! If she managed to find the source of her power, could she defeat this evil? Hell, would she even be able to fight it? What if it didn't have a physical form? She didn't know. Fuck! She really didn't know. But she had to do something.

So caught up in her thoughts, she didn't notice the telltale sensation that rushed over her skin. In some part of her mind, she felt it, but she didn't comprehend what it meant until it was almost too late. She spun around, heart hammering with shock, and couldn't, for the life of her, imagine what the hell had brought him all the way out here. And with a pregnant woman on his back, no less.

Lucidity stood rooted to the spot on the edge of the rice fields, completely flabbergasted, as Inuyasha came to a stop some distance away and Kagome climbed off his back. Both stared at her with the same mixture of surprise and confusion and she was quite certain that her expression probably mirrored theirs. Eventually she managed to close her mouth and swallow as she watched the astonishment recede from their faces, Kagome's falling into an expression of tentative uncertainty and Inuyasha narrowing his eyes.

"Lucidity?" Kagome called as she took a step forward, only for Inuyasha to immediately fling an arm out in front of her.

"Don't," he said. "That isn't her."

"Are you...are you sure, Inuyasha?" Kagome asked, but she was moving away, as if she merely needed her husband to confirm what she already knew.

Inuyasha responded by unsheathing Tessaiga and holding the massive fang at the ready, a heavy scowl twisting his mouth. "What the hell are you?!" he shouted at Lucidity. "You don't smell like a youkai, but you aren't human either. You are pretty stupid, though, huh? Taking on the form of our friend, thinking we'll let our guard down. Keh! You did this, didn't you? You slaughtered all these people. And now what are you doing? Setting fire to the village? What for?"

She'd be lying if she said none of this didn't sting, seeing the look of fear and disgust from Kagome, who had lifted the bow from her shoulder and was nocking an arrow in place, and hearing the accusations shouted by Inuyasha. He may not have liked her much, but having him treat her as if she was an enemy made it tempting to simply turn around and leave. She didn't need this crap on top of everything else. But what were they doing out here? It wasn't safe and Kagome was fucking pregnant! What was wrong with them?!

Suddenly, Inuyasha pointed Tessaiga at her, the glint in his eyes holding promises of dire consequences. "If you don't answer me, I'm going to start hacking away until there's nothing left of you. Did you massacre this village? Did you send your monsters here like you did to ours, hoping to finish us off?"

"Monsters?" Lucidity blurted out. "What are you talking about?"

"Wrong answer!" Inuyasha shouted, lifting Tessaiga and bringing it down.

The energy of the Wind Scar cut through the air. Lucidity felt the heat of it on her skin moments before her form dissolved in a whirlwind that spun out of the path of the attack. She materialized further away from the shoot-first-ask-questions-but-not-care-about-the-answers-hanyou and stared at where she'd been standing a second ago. Dust was settling over the ground and she could see several smoking gouges in the earth, deep and long and very much fatal if she hadn't moved.

"Are you fucking crazy?!" she shouted. "Knock your shit off already, Inuyasha! It's me, it's Lucidity, you idiot!"

"You think you can fool me?" he growled, turning his sword on her once more. "You don't smell like her at all!"

"I know, but just let me explain. No-!"

And again, she was dodging another Wind Scar, body dissolving and rising into the air. This time, she didn't take her physical form immediately after, but drifted overhead, riding the currents and circling faster than normal in her agitation. Inuyasha was turning on the spot, shouting and cursing for her to come back, to not be a coward, and she wondered about barreling him over. If she could just get the upper hand, but show that she wasn't a threat, maybe she could get them to listen. But damned if she didn't have some rotten fucking luck right now!

It was Kagome's arrow that she had to duck now. The purifying energy didn't hurt, but it rattled her essence, brushing so close, as if it was clashing with her aura. She dove to the ground and spread out over the grass as Kagome nocked another arrow.

"There, Inuyasha!" Kagome shouted, pointing the way with said arrow.

"Got it!" he cried out and leapt forward, raising Tessaiga in both hands.

Both attacks came at once. There was no time to think, no time to process or stress or wonder how she would get out of this one. She could only react. Hogosha was in her grasp before she even realized she was crouched on one knee, completely corporeal, with Inuyasha bearing down on her from one side, the arrow closing in on the other. Energy flared as Hogosha burned a blinding white, lengthening, electricity crackling and warring with the power of Kagome's sacred arrow. Out of the corner of her eye, Lucidity saw the energy around the bit of wood flicker, sputter, and finally cancel out, just in time for it to bounce harmlessly against her side. And a second later, she was forced to the ground, landing hard on her back, Hogosha fully unsealed and taking the brunt of Tessaiga's force. The giant Fang scraped against the body of the scythe as Inuyasha stood over her, a triumphant smile on his face, and began to push down. It was now a battle of brute strength and Lucidity could feel every muscle of her body tense and straining against the hanyou, keeping a firm grip on Hogosha. The two weapons held their own, with no cracks appearing in either blade nor staff.

"In-u-ya-sha!" Lucidity bit out, breath coming sharp in her chest. "Stop!"

"Heh!" he laughed in return. "Better luck next time, bitch."

"You stupid mutt!" she shouted, but already she could feel her elbows starting to buckle as sweat trickled over her forehead. A surge of panic threatened to overwhelm as Tessaiga loomed closer and a strangled noise broke from her before she could stop it. "Kagome!" she yelled with a wild abandonment. "This isn't one of the times I envy you for having such a dense husband! Get him off of me!"

"You don't talk to her, you hear me?!" Inuyasha snapped and pressed down harder, enough that Lucidity could feel her body actually sink into the earth an inch or so.

"Wait! Inuyasha, wait! That's-"

Whatever Kagome was trying to say ended in a sharp gasp. Lucidity didn't have to wonder long at what had caught her attention when a fist appeared seemingly out of nowhere and connected hard with Inuyasha's face. His shock didn't even have much of a chance to register in his expression as he and his sword were sent hurtling to the ground, while Lucidity was left laying on her back, a heavy numbness settling over her, as she stared up at the aloof countenance of a certain daiyoukai.

"What the fuck, Sesshomaru?!" shouted Inuyasha as he picked himself up, but was immediately distracted by his wife darting forward. "Kagome, no! Don't-"

"Lucidity, are you okay?" Kagome asked, almost breathless, falling to her knees next to the woman, bow thrown back over her shoulder. "I'm so sorry! We had no idea. Your aura is completely different from what it was before. What happened?"

Laying there, heart racing, Lucidity shifted her gaze from Sesshomaru, who was staring placidly down at her, to the young priestess kneeling over her, expression anxious, while Inuyasha sputtered in the background. "Long...long story," she managed as she sat up. At the same time, she retracted Hogosha's energy and slid it back into the leather pouch at her hip.

"There's no way this is possible," Inuyasha said the moment she was on her feet. "You can't be Lucidity; you're not human."

"No shit!" she snapped. "But that doesn't mean I'm not the same person. Why do you think Sesshomaru stopped you?"

For the first time, worry lines appeared in Inuyasha's forehead as he cast an uncertain glance in his brother's direction. And yet, true to his nature, Sesshomaru didn't say a word, but walked off, back towards the village and the pyres that were still burning. Lucidity watched his retreating form and those measured, familiar steps of his with a mixture of disbelief and nervousness, not quite trusting her own sight.

Inuyasha, in the meantime, stood, unmoving and obviously deliberately, Tessaiga still grasped tightly in hand.

"Inuyasha, trust me," Kagome said. "This _is_ Lucidity."

"Hmph! Fine," he grumbled and Tessaiga shrank back into a rusty old sword. He sheathed the weapon as he approached, frowning hard from one woman to the other, then made an unexpected statement. "If Sesshomaru knew, he should have fucking said something earlier."

Lucidity's brows hiked towards her hairline. "How's that?" she asked.

"We've been traveling with him for a few days," Kagome explained. "He hasn't told us anything about where you were or why you went off on your own. We were starting to get worried, but he wasn't interested in finding you. I'm so relieved that you're all right, but what happened between you two? Was it because of...?" She trailed off and gestured vaguely at Lucidity, who couldn't help but narrow her eyes with a frown, not the least bit keen on this conversation.

"Keh! Who cares about that crap?" snapped Inuyasha, much to her relief. "What I want to know is what happened here. Did you find anything?" 

"You mean besides the remains of the villagers?" Lucidity replied. "No, didn't find a damn thing."

"Did any of them have black veins?" Inuyasha asked, either oblivious to the sarcasm or just didn't give a crap.

Lucidity blinked. "Yeah. Are those the monsters you mentioned before trying to cut my head off?"

He nodded, then suddenly a cocky grin split his mouth. "You should know that you seriously suck at fighting. You're lucky Sesshomaru decided to follow us here."

"Inuyasha!" Kagome exclaimed. "How could you say that? We could have killed her!"

"It's fine, Kagome," Lucidity said, stepping closer to Inuyasha and smirking up at him. "Next time, I won't hold back and you'll end up being the lucky one who survives."

He blinked several times before snickering. "You're on!"

That surprised her. She'd expected him to get annoyed with her, not amused. It appeared as if he had forgotten their last encounter. Lucidity was doubtful of that, but she couldn't understand the change in his attitude toward her. Maybe a friendly fight for Inuyasha was the equivalent of a budding friendship, but that still didn't explain his behavior. She stared after the hanyou as he suddenly turned and headed in the same direction Sesshomaru had gone. 

"I'm going to check the area and make sure there aren't anymore of those creatures around," he called over his shoulder. "You two stay here. Lucidity, keep an eye on Kagome. Don't let anything happen to her."

"I...what?" she said, but he was already gone, having disappeared into the sea of huts. She peered over at the priestess in question, completely baffled. "Even if he does believe who I am, I thought I was on his shit list. Did he...did he tell you?"

Kagome bit down on her lip, then nodded. "Yeah, but Sesshomaru cleared that up for us. I knew you were different from us, that there was a chance you were capable of.... But I never believed you could ever enjoy it."

"Well, that's...good to know, I guess," she muttered, brushing a hand through her hair and peering off towards the pyres. There was so much to process right now. She was still hyped up from the fight and felt as if she should be moving, that it wasn't a good idea to stay in one spot too long. And yet she was hesitant. She didn't believe the shock of seeing Sesshomaru had quite sunk in yet. It all felt too surreal.

Without warning, her vision was suddenly obscured by a nest of black hair and arms were wrapping tight around her neck. She stiffened in surprise and started to reach for Kagome on reflex, but refrained at the last moment before, very hesitantly, laying her hands over the woman's back. She took great care to keep her grip loose as she returned the hug, coupled with a bit of awkward patting.

"Did someone miss me?" she teased gently.

"Don't be such a jerk," Kagome mumbled, squeezing harder and giving a very audible sniff.

"Hey, hey," Lucidity murmured and hugged her close, though remained mindful of her strength. "I missed you, too. And Sango, Miroku, and everyone else. I would have visited, but I didn't want to put any of you at risk."

Kagome stepped back and wiped at her eyes before offering a smile. "I know, I know. I'm just so happy to see you again, and these hormones are making me a little crazy. Don't mind me, really."

Lucidity snorted. "Yeah, about that. I have to ask: what the fuck are you doing out here, risking your life when you're pregnant?"

Kagome blinked, and then, for the first time, Lucidity was suddenly on the receiving end of the infamous expression of fury that was usually reserved for Inuyasha. She even took a few hasty steps back as Kagome drew herself up, fists at her sides. "These monsters came to our home! People were killed, including our headman! I'm not about to sit back and let this happen to anyone else. Don't ever try to guilt me into going back! I'm seeing this through until the end, do you understand?"

"Yes, ma'am, totally understand," Lucidity said with a weak smile, hands up in defeat. Yet her expression quickly grew somber and she lowered her arms. "I should have been the one to take care of this, though."

"Huh?" said Kagome, her anger starting to deflate. "What do you mean?"

"Just that.... I...crap! I'm not even sure where to begin." Lucidity covered her face with her hands, a deep groan breaking from her, and shook her head before looking up. "This is all tied in with the rising power we knew was coming. It should have been dealt with sooner. And I...it's just really important that I take care of it. I didn't want any of you involved. Ugh! This is all just insane and...fuck! I don't know what to do, Kagome!" she ended with another groan, raking both hands through her hair and tilting her head back.

"Hey, look! It's okay."

Kagome touched her shoulder and Lucidity glanced over at her friend, lowering her hands, only to promptly have Kagome lace their arms together and tug her away from the village. "Let's take a walk, get away from this place. Come on. We need to clear our heads. And the smell here is horrible. Did you build those, by the way?" she added, jerking her chin towards the pyres.

"Yeah. It looked like that was what the survivors were doing before they were attacked; seemed like a good idea to keep the infection from spreading."

Kagome nodded as she led them through the fields, which were filled with dried stocks of what had once been healthy plants. "It was youkai that attacked our village. They were sick, too, like rabid animals, going after anything in sight. I saw them take down a cow and start to eat it, but then they just left it there, still alive, when something else caught their attention." She shuddered, going a bit pale.

"Same thing happened here, but there was only one infected still up and moving."

"Only one?"

Lucidity nodded and conveyed what had taken place that morning while they continued their aimless walk, still arm-in-arm. (And that was rather strange of itself, definitely not something she and Kagome had done before; but it was comforting to one who had been so deprived of decent human contact for weeks.)

"Nothing like that happened to any of the infected we saw," Kagome said once Lucidity finished. 

"Maybe it eventually happens to all of them," Lucidity mused. "Humans probably succumbed to it faster. It would explain why we haven't had many sightings or heard much beyond some vague rumors."

"Whatever it is, it's awful," replied Kagome. "It will be a relief when we get to the bottom of this."

Lucidity nodded. "Yeah, me too. Where are Sango and Miroku, by the way? Are they back at the village?"

Kagome shook her head. "They didn't want to stay behind with me and Inuyasha going. We put protective warding around the village before we left to keep everyone safe. Sango and Miroku are off with Jaken not too far from here. Miroku and I sensed some youkai nearby at the same time Sesshomaru and Inuyasha smelled the burning bodies, so we separated to look into both."

"And I'm guessing Sesshomaru ordered Jaken to take Miroku and Sango?"

Kagome grinned slightly. "Yeah. He wasn't too happy about that. Hey! Lucidity, what do you make of this?" she suddenly asked, hurrying forward to a patch of particularly dry and withered plants, more gray in color than the rest.

"Dunno," Lucidity said as she moved closer for a better look. She touched one of the stocks. It felt no different than the ones that had been brushing against her while they had been traipsing through the fields.

"There's more down here," Kagome announced as she wandered further along the rows. "It's spreading outward the deeper into the field it goes. The ground is darker, too; the dirt looks like ash."

Absently, Lucidity broke off the stock she was inspecting. She turned it over in her hand as she began making her way over to Kagome, studying the brittle plant and having no idea what to make of any of this. A sound of crumbling rock had Lucidity lifting her head with a frown. She couldn't see anything other than dead plants and Kagome standing in the middle of it, looking around as well for the source of the noise. The sound came again, louder, and this time Kagome sank a couple inches into the soil. Lucidity barely managed to register the dawning comprehension and fear on Kagome's face before the ground gave way beneath her feet and the earth swallowed her whole.

Kagome's scream echoed in Lucidity's ears as she jumped in after her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my! What's this? A two chapter update at once?! Don't get used to it. This might be a one time deal. I just really wanted to get chapter 33 out to you all to enjoy. There's so much happening, and I'm really excited for the upcoming chapters. Some aspects are causing me a bit of pain, but overall I'm eager to get them done and posted for the delight of everyone! 
> 
> Also...OMG! Over 100 kudos! Thank you all so much! Seriously! Thank you to everyone who took the time to click that little button that let's me know you like what you see. And also I want to thank everyone who has taken the time to comment, whether it was once or twice or too many to count! The readers are ultimately what keeps me going when I sometimes stare at the screen and go: what the fuck am I doing? XD Insane, I know, but sometimes that little bug of a muse refuses to bite and I struggle through. But the responses I get make the time and effort worthwhile, knowing how much you all enjoy the end result! Again, thank you all so much!


	34. Chapter 34

The good news was that Kagome had a soft landing in water. The bad news was that she fell right into a rushing river a couple dozen feet below ground inside a cavern. The current was so swift that Lucidity had to push to keep up with the dark head bobbing above the water. The fact that Kagome managed not to break anything was a relief, but now she was being swept away, crying out for help whenever she managed to get a gulp of fresh air. Lucidity couldn't understand what a river was doing underground, but that was really beside the point as she rushed above the water, formless and swift and suddenly panicked when she saw that Kagome was being carried into a tunnel with a low ceiling. A very low ceiling.

Lucidity dove into the river as Kagome was forced under and reached her just in time, but it was too late to fight the current. Yet, having the form of wind beneath water was different. Quite different. She was forcing the water outward, away from Kagome, creating just enough of an air pocket that the priestess could breathe, but did not have enough strength to the push back against the raging river at the same time. Part of Lucidity wondered if it was possible to take hold of Kagome, to reduce her body into a whirlwind of air, just as Sesshomaru could coalesce the one he carried into a ball of energy when he decided to use that particular mode of travel. However, Lucidity didn't dare test that theory with a pregnant woman of all people. She, instead, opted to keep Kagome safe in the air pocket as they were brought further and further through the tunnel, deeper underground it seemed, until they began to rise and Lucidity finally noticed a difference in the lighting above.

Both their heads broke the surface, Lucidity holding firmly onto Kagome. The river was not quite the mad torrent here and it wouldn't have been too difficult, even for a human, to swim towards the bank. But Kagome's exhaustion palpable as she clung to Lucidity, who pulled the priestess along with her arms hanging around her neck. Back on dry land, Kagome collapsed, panting heavily, with nothing but the clothes on her back, her bow and quiver of arrows having been washed away by the current. Meanwhile, Lucidity stood and peered around. Even to her eyes, the darkness was oppressive and she didn't have to struggle to imagine what it must be like for a human. Taking Hogosha out, she unsealed part of its form, so that it was little more than a walking staff. The flow of energy, though, she kept open, so that there was a constant glow throughout its length, providing a solitary source of light. 

"Where-where are we?" gasped Kagome, lifting her head and peering around. 

"Fucked?" Lucidity suggested. 

"Is that a joke?" Kagome grumbled, now sitting up. "I can never tell when you're joking, but I don't find this situation very funny, either." 

"Neither do I, but a bit of dry humor is better than blind panic," Lucidity said as she offered a hand to her friend. "Don't you think?" 

"I guess," was the reluctant reply as Kagome stood with her help. "How are we going to get out of here? Do you think Inuyasha or Sesshomaru will be able to find us?" 

Lucidity turned around and took in the high walls of the cavern, larger than the previous one, and the little path of land they were on that separated them from the river. "I have no idea," she muttered, tilting her head back to stare up at the ceiling. "Stay here." 

"Where are you-Oh!" Kagome gasped.

Lucidity paid her no mind. She knew that there would eventually be some serious questions to answer. For now, though, she rose into the air, lifted by the energy she gathered beneath her that had her clothes and hair fluttering, until she reached the ceiling and placed a hand on the earthen surface. Drawing back the arm of her free hand, she plowed a fist through the layer of rock and soil. Pieces crumbled and broke off, raining into the water below with an echoing splash. She delivered another punch to the ceiling, hoping to catch a glimpse of sky beyond, and promptly felt something molten and gooey spread over her knuckles. Wrenching her arm back with a curse, she peered down at her hand and felt her stomach go cold. 

"Shit, shit, shit!" she breathed, upon racing back to where Kagome waited and crouching beside the river, wasting no time to plunge her hand into the water. 

"What is it?" Kagome asked.

"The blackness that infected the villagers," she grunted and Kagome covered her mouth in horror. "Looks like digging our way out isn't going to be an option. Shit, that stings!" 

"Are you okay? You're not...it didn't infect you, too, did it?" 

Lucidity lifted her hand up, Hogosha still clutched in her other, and studied the raw skin of her knuckles. There was no revolting stench, as apparently a body was needed to bring about that smell, but there was no mistaking what it was. Flexing her fingers, she turned her hand back and forth a couple times, before rising to her feet. "Doesn't look like. Just burns. Fuck, I hate being burned." She peered up at the ceiling once more and the hole she had made gaped back at her, the tar-like liquid oozing and dripping from it like grotesque blood. "Where is it coming from?" 

"I don't know," said Kagome. "But we should probably follow-" 

Her words were abruptly cut off as she let out a yelp of surprise. Lucidity couldn't blame her because she, too, jumped when a ball of light unexpectedly shot out from the water and rose to hang in the air above them. As they watched, the light dissipated and two forms solidified, that of a stoic youkai lord holding a cursing hanyou by the back neck of his haori. 

"Dammit, Sesshomaru, I didn't ask for your help!" Inuyasha shouted.

"Do not mistake me," Sesshomaru replied. "You were in my way." 

"Whatever! Put me down before I break your arm," his brother spat, raising a fist for emphasis. 

Sesshomaru merely tilted his head and a muscle suddenly twitched near his lips. "As you wish." 

Inuyasha realized his mistake a second too late. His eyes flew wide and he barely managed to get out "No, wait!" when Sesshomaru granted his wish and loosened his grip. Red and silver plummeted a good fifty feet or so into the water below and the resulting splash sprayed the already soaked women. Lucidity nonetheless wiped a hand over her face and shook out her hair, just in time to see Inuyasha's head come up with a resonating echo of "Asshole!" 

Not too long ago, Lucidity would have been laughing her ass off at the entire display. Yet the sight of Sesshomaru descending to the ground next to them drove pretty much everything else from her mind. Her grip tightened on Hogosha as those golden eyes came to rest on her and she inhaled rather deeply, trying to force her pulse to calm the fuck down. There was a chance, she knew, that she would most likely run into him at some point; she simply hadn't expected it so soon. She had to stay focused, remind herself the reason she was here. There were much more important matters that needed to be dealt with. There could be real danger down here, if the burn on her hand was anything to go by. 

"Are you okay, Kagome?" 

Lucidity glanced over when she heard Inuyasha speak. He was out of the water and Kagome was clinging to him in a tight embrace, so tense with trembling relief that it felt rather indecent to bare witness to. As Kagome answered that she was fine, safe, and all that jazz, the words muffled with her face buried in her husband's chest, Lucidity shifted Hogosha from one hand to the other and peered down the length of the river in an effort to distract herself from everyone else, curious if she could see some sort of end.

"You're hurt." 

She went still at the sound of Sesshomaru's voice, addressing her directly, then looked over at him, uncertain and bemused as to why he would comment on such a thing aloud, let alone with others present. 

"What is down here that is strong enough to inflict such damage?" he asked. 

Ah, now that made more sense. Recovering herself, she pointed at the hole. "The earth is laced with the poison that's been killing everything." 

Inuyasha, still holding his wife, tilted his head back to stare at the small amount of damage done to the ceiling. "Looks like we aren't breaking out of here by force." 

"I was just saying that we should follow the river and see if it lets out somewhere," Kagome said. 

"Better than nothing," her husband replied. "Hey, Lucidity, you wanna lead the way with that glowing stick thing?" 

Before she could so much as form a reply, Sesshomaru, who had been studying the bleeding hole, suddenly walked forward, brushing past Kagome and his brother. "Is your sight so diminished by your human blood, Inuyasha?" he asked with a hint of a sneer in his tone. "How pathetic." 

"Can't you just fuck off for once?" Inuyasha growled. "You only followed me down here to be a pain in my ass, didn't you?" Yet when there was no reply, he did nothing more than scoff and take Kagome by the hand to lead her down the path after the daiyoukai, with Lucidity bringing up the rear. Barely a minute had gone by, however, when Inuyasha abruptly peered back over his shoulder at her. "I don't know how you put up with him for so long. Half the time I'm about to murder him." 

"Inuyasha!" Kagome said in her familiar, reprimanding tone. 

"Well, it's true," he grumbled. "He was barely tolerable when we were searching for the vipers. Now he's even worse. What the hell happened to make him pissier than usual?" he asked suddenly, glancing back at Lucidity once again.

"And what?" Lucidity snapped with a rush of anger she couldn't quite contain; or maybe she didn't want to. "You consider yourself a fucking ray of sunshine, Inuyasha? Mind your own damn business!" 

Both Kagome and Inuyasha stopped in surprise at her outburst, but she didn't give either of them a chance to respond. She kept walking, striding past them, and didn't look back when Kagome called her name. Up ahead, Sesshomaru hadn't paused. Lucidity slowed her pace so that she remained behind him, which was all well and good considering how narrow the path was becoming. A ready made excuse, really, to keep her distance, but she felt like such a child, barely able to make eye contact when that silver head turned and she caught a glimpse of gold peering back at her. She looked away, towards the river, which seemed to reflect the tumult inside her. The anger didn't dissipate, but went deeper, an agonizing discomfort that fed off the confusion of emotions that never ceased their plague and spread through her like its own infection. It was torture. Absolute torture being so close to him and yet having this great gulf that separated them. She hated it, every second, every moment that she had to draw breath and force herself to keep her head above the flood, to remind herself that whatever had been, whatever could be, was gone. And it was for the best. 

She closed her eyes and repeated this in her mind, over and over, like a damn mantra. As she did with any emotions threatened to overwhelm-or as she should do, at least-she cast the turmoil aside. Anger, hurt, longing. All that crap she just did not need right now, not ever, she pushed it down. Shoved it into a goddamn box and threw away the fucking key because she wanted to experience none of it again. She did not doubt that eventually  the box would break. The emotions would come flooding back. But as of this moment, she wouldn't tolerate it; she could not afford to. Taking a deep breath, she slowly exhaled and opened her eyes. Her head was clear, but she didn't feel better. She felt hollow, but that was the price to pay for self-preservation. 

The group continued on through the cavern with nothing but the sound of their footsteps and the river flowing beside them. Not a word was spoken and that was fine with Lucidity. She occupied her time with looking around, searching for some sign of an exit or another passageway, yet none were forthcoming. There was nothing but rushing water and high, narrow walls, a combination she was really starting to detest, and so much darkness surrounding them. Hogosha could illuminate only up to a point. She kept the staff against the back of her shoulder, not unlike how one might hold the dull edge of a katana at the back in a resting position, and moved it only when the path began to narrow, forcing her to turn her body so that she didn't lose her balance. Behind her, she could hear Inuyasha murmuring to Kagome about being careful, that he had her in case she slipped, and everything else that involved a concerned partner. It was highly tempting to simply rush on ahead of everyone and find a way out of here on her own; of course, she would come back and give directions, but she did not know how long she could tolerate the current company. If the variable of the daiyoukai was removed, then she might actually enjoy having even the likes of Inuyasha around. But Sesshomaru's presence certainly threw a wrench into matters and she would simply have to bear it until this was all over. 

And maybe that would be sooner rather than later, she thought, a little hopeful when the path and walls started to widen. The group was finally able to spread out as they entered another part of the cavern that was almost as large as the ceremonial chambers back at the palace. The only downside was that this was where the cavern floor ended. The course of the river shifted and turned, almost encircling them, as it separated the bit of land from the far wall of the cavern. Lucidity, along with Kagome and Inuyasha, joined Sesshomaru at the edge of the water. It continued to flow, right into the wall. 

"Looks like it leads into another tunnel," Kagome said. 

Inuyasha snorted. "Great. Who goes first?" 

"Lucidity," answered Kagome at once. 

"I'm sorry? Why are you volunteering me?" replied the woman in question.

"You kept me breathing under water," said Kagome. "Whatever happened to you, the things you're able to do now, can help with this. You can go through first and see how long the tunnel is, then come back and tell us if it's safe or if you need to take us one by one to make sure we don't drown." 

"Sounds good to me," Inuyasha said with a toothy grin. "Ladies first then." 

Lucidity frowned. "Have I ever mentioned how much I despise swimming?"

"Going into the water would be ill advised," Sesshomaru suddenly said. 

"What do you mean?" Kagome asked. 

Sesshomaru didn't answer, but continued to stare straight ahead. The rest followed suit. A second later, Inuyasha swore and pulled Kagome back, while Lucidity stared for a long moment at the far wall, not sure at first if she could trust her eyes. Yet there was no mistaking it. The same blackness that had burned her hand and poisoned the land was trickling down the wall and into the river like putrefied blood. There was no visible source in sight. It seemed as if the earth itself was secreting the crap the same way a person's skin secreted oil.

"Son of a bitch," Lucidity muttered. 

"I guess we're blasting our way out after all," said Inuyasha. 

Lucidity shook her head and shifted the still glowing Hogosha from one hand to the other. "And good luck getting that shit off of you when the blow back comes. We might be fine, but what about Kagome?" 

"You think I haven't thought of that?" demanded the hanyou, who was suddenly loosening his haori. A second later, he was shrugging off the Robe of the Fire Rat and flinging it around Kagome's shoulders, bringing the material over her head so she was sufficiently protected. 

The priestess smiled. "Thank you, Inuyasha," she murmured, and his usually hard countenance softened as he smiled in return. "But are you sure about this?"

"We need to get out of here," Inuyasha replied, and then added in an undertone that was nonetheless heard by everyone else, "I don't want to risk you being exposed for too long in your condition." 

About the time that Kagome's eyes began to glaze over with the telltale sign of tears was when Lucidity looked away from the pair. A scowl was threatening to pull at her mouth, but she quickly schooled her features into submission. This was irritating. She had envied Kagome before, being so pleasantly happy in this era with friends and family. Now seeing her and Inuyasha interact was nothing but a painful reminder of what she, Lucidity, had almost had. How was it that the younger Inu brother, the one who was considered the uncouth mongrel with dirty blood, treated his woman better than his elder brother, the prestigious and pure blooded youkai lord, treated his? It was maddening! On reflex, Lucidity brought a hand up to her mouth and bit down on her thumbnail, wishing she had her necklace and aching for a distraction, which thankfully came a moment later when Inuyasha told Kagome to step back. And then he was drawing Tessaiga and moving away from the group, gaze fixed on the ceiling above.

With nary a thought, Lucidity retracted Hogosha and returned it to its sheathe. She was apprehensive about this plan, but did not object. She had no alternative suggestion in mind, after all, and could only watch in silence while Inuyasha hefted Tessaiga with both hands and spread his feet. But then a movement out of the corner of her eye caught her attention. She glanced over, not particularly interested in whatever it was, until a thrill of alarm went through her when she saw that the blackness along the wall was no longer a steady drip. Rather, the rivulets had thickened and were lacing together over the rock, spreading like roided out veins over the wall and wriggling like worms; truly a grotesque sight.

All this she registered in the span of a heartbeat and had barely lifted a hand towards Hogosha when, in a small, concentrated area, the writhing mass of blackness stiffened. And as though they had been hidden this entire time within the rocks, three sharp points of what had been little more than molten tar a second ago shot out. With perfect precision, perfect focus, and utterly lethal intentions, Lucidity didn't have a chance to comprehend what was going on, what was coming at her. She didn't have time to understand, just react, as seemed to be the norm these days. Yet all she could react to was the hand that closed over her wrist and yanked her back. A gasp broke from her as she was flung away, landing hard on the ground and skidding several feet, right into a pair of legs. A cry of shock told her those legs belonged to Kagome, who was toppling on top of her.

"Lucidity?!" the priestess breathed when the woman automatically caught her. "What's-"

"Sesshomaru! You idiot!" came Inuyasha's shout of panicked fury.

Lucidity, pushing herself up, mind slow to process and weighed down with confusion, peered over at the daiyoukai, and went cold with horror. She felt as though the floor had been swept out from under her, as all sensation fled her body at the sight of Sesshomaru standing rigid on the spot and staring down at blood soaking the front of his haori, dripping onto the ground from the dark spikes protruding out of his stomach, his expression clenched in pain. He'd thrown her out of harm's way, only to be impaled as a result.

Lucidity sprang to her feet, almost sending Kagome tumbling from her lap before remembering to keep a grip on her, just as Inuyasha sprang forward and sliced through the tendrils of blackness with Tessaiga. One half retracted back into the wall. The other half Sesshomaru tore out with a sense of agonized impatience and tossed into the water.

"What's going on?" Kagome whispered into her ear. "Is it attacking? Is Sesshomaru hurt?" 

Lucidity barely managed to exhale a simple "yes" when the blackness gathered, then unexpectedly rose high into the air and came down in a rain that resembled something straight out of a horror film. This time, everyone was a target. She caught a glimpse of the Inu brothers darting from their respective places to avoid the attack moments before she lifted Kagome into her arms and did the same. Again and again, the blackness lashed out, weaving around them, striking at empty air with Lucidity one step ahead. She could hear Inuyasha cursing, the sound of Tessaiga and probably Bakusaiga clashing with the tendrils. There wasn't a chance to draw Hogosha and join the fray. Her efforts were focused on the one in her arms, whom she had inadvertently been charged to protect, the one who kept crying out in her ear, shouting for her husband. 

"Dammit, Kagome, enough already!" Lucidity yelled after a particular shriek caused her to lose her footing and a tendril shot past her face, singeing her cheek before she was able to jump out of the way. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" the priestess wailed. "If only I had my arrows!" 

There wasn't a chance to reply as she was forced to turn, Kagome clinging tight to her, and leapt backwards, again and again as the blackness continued its endless assault. And then she felt her heel touch something hard and solid and realized she was up against a wall. She darted to the side, only to jerk to a stop when a sharp spike cut through the air and her tunic alike. She felt the fabric along her stomach tear, felt the burn of the blackness on her skin, and jumped back, just to stumble to a halt again when another tendril impeded her way. A third was racing straight for her and Kagome, arching above their heads, blocking the last path. If she dissolved her body, would it help? Could she do the same with Kagome? What if it terminated the pregnancy? Fuck! She and Inuyasha could always try again, but that wouldn't be possible if Kagome was dead.

The decision was made and Lucidity braced herself, hoping against hope that Kagome would be fine. But then, suddenly, the decision was moot when the great Fang carved through the blackness as though it was nothing but pieces of hair. The severed ends fell to the ground, twitching as though they were decapitated snakes in their death throes, and Inuyasha was standing in front of the women, cursing once more and lifting his sword in both hands. 

"Enough of this," he growled. "You two get down." 

He raised Tessaiga in both hands and Lucidity felt the gathering energy. Not knowing what else to do, she actually obeyed the hanyou and crouched down. Kagome pulled the Fire Rat fur closer to her face, while Lucidity cast a wild look around the cavern and spotted the familiar, white and silver figure overhead, holding his own against the blackness in spite of his wounds. Yet at Inuyasha's warning shout, Sesshomaru risked a brief glance to the ground before he made another slash at the blackness with Bakusaiga, then blasted the tendrils surrounding him with a flare of disintegrating power, just as Inuyasha unleashed the Wind Scar.

Lucidity caught a glimpse of Sesshomaru descending safely to the ground, sheathing Bakusaiga as he went, and a hand going to his stomach, before the wall of the cavern burst apart in a shower of rock and soil and molten tar. She turned her face into the Fire Rat fur, covering her head with one arm and Kagome with the other. Exclamations of pain could be heard from Inuyasha, along with several more colorful words, as the reverberating echo of destruction was on the verge of deafening them all until it finally began to subside. Ears ringing, Lucidity shook her head and looked up. Inuyasha had shoved Tessaiga point down in the ground and was doing an odd little dance of swiping off the bits of blackness that were decorating him. Vaguely she realized that the reason she and Kagome had not suffered the same fate was because he had been blocking the worst of it from them.  

Beyond him, the wall was little more than a pile of rubble. There was a dull clatter of pieces still falling, splashes as rocks disappeared into the water, and no sign of the oozing dark mess that had had a mind of its own. Sunlight streamed in through several cracks and holes in the ceiling, providing enough light that Kagome gasped at the sight of everything. Inuyasha was there not even a heartbeat later, having sheathed Tessaiga, and helped his wife to her feet, without even a cursory glance in Lucidity's direction, priorities and all. 

"Are you hurt?" he was asking as Lucidity stood and moved away from the pair, towards the river. 

"I-I'm fine," came the stammered response. "She kept me safe. I.... What was that, Inuyasha?" 

"No idea," said the hanyou. "But let's get the hell out of here already." 

Lucidity was staring into the water, searching for any hint or sign of some remains, when she heard Inuyasha's footsteps coming up behind her. This time, he did look at her when he drew level and gave a little nod before he bounded forward, strength and momentum carrying him upward, Kagome on his back. Lucidity watched him rise into the air, use the rubble to propel himself further, then disappear through one of the openings in the ceiling. Like a breath of fresh air, it was, seeing them escape from this nightmare of a hellhole. This place was far too dangerous, even for youkai. A hand came to her stomach and her finger traced the outline of the tear in the tunic before she peered over at Sesshomaru, who had his own hand on his far more serious injuries. He was gazing down at the mess that was his haori, at the blood that covered his palm and continued to drip. It was in this moment that she realized he still wore no armor. 

"That looks bad," she said.

"You needn't concern yourself with it," was the immediate response. 

Her lips parted, a hard retort on the tip of her tongue, but she snapped her mouth shut at the last second and shook her head. It _was_ her concern, always would be. Yet there was no point in arguing, of telling him this. It would accomplish nothing, even if he had been injured in an effort to save her...again. She let out a sigh just as Sesshomaru took to the air and, after a moment, she did the same. Once they were out of here, she doubted she would stay, perhaps not even long enough to see Miroku and Sango. The evil of rising power that brought the blackness had to be dealt with and she didn't want or need other stuff getting in the way. She didn't need any of them interfering, despite knowing it would be next to impossible for them to leave this alone.

So engrossed in her thoughts and wondering how she might manipulate everyone into agreeing to go back to their village, she paid no heed to the noise going on below as what remained of the cavern wall continued to tumble into the river. One splash after another, louder and louder, until something altogether exploded out of the river, as if the water was regurgitating everything that had gone into it. A searing pain encased her ankle moments before she was yanked down and dragged beneath the water.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> O! I do so love cliffhangers! And broken hearts ^.^ I'm evil, I know. Hope you all enjoyed!


	35. Chapter 35

Ankles. Wrists. Throat. Everything was burning. And she couldn't breathe. How ridiculous was that? Her body could break down into the molecules the made up the atmosphere and she could ride the currents of the wind as a person could walk across blades of grass, but she couldn't fucking breathe! The grip of the tendrils was squeezing so hard that spots were dancing in front of her eyes. Beneath the water, she could still see. It was in a horrible state of confusion, but she could definitely see the black mass at the bottom of the river, dancing like demented seaweed, as more tendrils curled upward and out of the water. She couldn't break free or break down. She tried drawing on that ability and releasing the hold deep inside, tried to dissolve her form, but found it was impossible. Whatever this blackness was, whatever empowered it, this substance had her trapped and was pulling her deeper and deeper. 

Above her, she heard a splash, but her focus was slipping. Those spots were growing bigger across her vision. Her heart was racing, pounding in her temple, as she thrashed, trying with ever increasing desperation to get free. How was it that she could be so strong and yet still so weak? She was like a child who had discovered the potential of a rifle, but did not have the experience or training to truly understand how deadly such a weapon could be. How could she be the daughter of a deity when she couldn't even defeat the first real threat she'd come across? Shouldn't she be capable of more? Had she not been told over and over how powerful the Guardians were, how powerful she could be? If only she could find the source of that power, if only she didn't have to rely on others! She was sick of it. So fucking sick of it all! She had no control over what was happening, over anything, not even her own goddamn life! Her own fate did not belong to her!

Something else was in the water, twisting as she was, near hidden in the surrounding blackness, and she lost her train of thought upon recognizing him. Sesshomaru had not jumped in of his own accord, she realized, as she saw the dark cords of blackness wrapped around him as they were her, right down to the one at his throat. His wounds were bleeding steadily into the water as he struggled, unable to reach his swords, his claws and Whip having no effect on the tendrils. And then she saw the scarlet gleam of his eyes, his mouth opening to reveal a perfect row of fangs, his entire body taking on that familiar glow of energy and she could practically feel the vibration of his power through the river until, all at once, it vanished. Like life leaving a body, Sesshomaru's aura was reduced to nothing. The scarlet receded from the whites of his eyes and he blinked slowly, once, twice, before his body abruptly slackened and his eyes rolled shut. 

The rush of terror was a scream inside her head. The darkness that had been filling her vision disappeared as though the slate had been wiped clean and her hands gripped the tendril at her throat. Her fingers burned, just like every part of her the blackness touched, but she pulled and kept pulling until it began to loosen, began to slip from her neck, only to redouble its effort and squeeze so hard and so suddenly that her fingers felt as if they were about to snap. She screamed then, a soundless wail that was naught but a stream of bubbles from her mouth, and dug her fingers into the blackness as though hoping to tear right into its heart, if such a thing could exist.

Electricity crackled to life in her hands. The power she had felt that first night seized her in its paralyzing embrace and she succumbed. She let her mind, her body, her control, everything...she let it all go and let the power take her in return. Her vision turned white and it was like peering through a window covered in fog, seeing the electricity explode from her hands and rip into the blackness. The tendrils burst apart, becoming ashen in color before dissolving into nothing. And the power continued down until it struck the mass below, which flailed and writhed as if crying in agony. Gods, she hoped it was agony! 

Hogosha was in her hand as she sped through the water, carried by the currents of wind that created another air pocket around her, and wasted no time reaching the unconscious daiyoukai. The blade of the scythe sliced cleanly through the tendrils that held him, which disintegrated upon contact, and she caught him around the waist before rising from the river. Sesshomaru was a dead weight in her grasp and she didn't dare focus on the fear encroaching on her mind as she hefted him onto her back, still clutching tight to Hogosha. Down below, the water was moving, churning unnaturally, and she was not surprised when the blackness emerged in a great, solid wave. Lucidity felt the swell of power trembling in the scythe and did not hold back. She released it with a searing cut that scorched the air and the blackness alike with far more devastating results than what had been done to the mountain back on the Isle. The cavern, its ceiling, the blackness, everything was reduced to nothing, while what was left of the river that did not evaporate carved a fresh path through the new terrain. 

Perhaps the most disconcerting aspect, other than the limp form she held, was the scream that resonated in her ears. Bodiless, it echoed around her like a ghostly wail, the pitch neither high nor low that would determine if the source was male or female. Regardless, there didn't seem to be a source at all. But it didn't matter. The only thing that matter...the only one who mattered currently had his arms draped over her, his head resting on her shoulder, and she knew he was going to be pissed when he learned that someone else had saved his ass. 

Lucidity rose out of what remained of the cavern, which was little more than a giant hole in the ground, and her eyes quickly scanned the area, noting a lack of Inuyasha and Kagome, before she descended far enough from the river that there was no risk of the blackness creeping up on them without warning again. She wondered, even worried a bit, about her friends, but needed to focus on one thing at a time. Quickly returning Hogosha to its sealed form and back into the sheathe, she lowered herself to her knees and Sesshomaru onto his back. Yet as she swept the mokomoko out from under his head, a red blur of movement caught her eye and she looked up to see Inuyasha skidding to a stop with Kagome still on his back. 

"What the fuck was that?!" the hanyou roared as his wife clambered down. "Was that you? You could have killed us! What happened? Why's Sesshomaru...? What the fuck did he get himself into this time?!" 

Lucidity didn't answer. She didn't so much as mutter anything remotely reassuring as she knelt over the daiyoukai and took his face in her hands, leaning her cheek to his nose and mouth. A thrill of alarm fluttered in her chest when she felt no breath on her skin and, ignoring the two standing on Sesshomaru's other side, put a hand on his forehead and eased his head back while tilting his chin up in the same movement. Though she had given the instructions for years, more often than she could ever recall, this was the first time she had done it herself. Her hands trembled and her mind frayed at the edges in a panic, but she managed to pinch his nose shut, clamp her mouth over his, and exhale every last ounce of breath she possessed into his lungs. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw his chest rise and the sight of his body convulsing filled her with a strangled relief that was almost painful.

In the same instant, before she could draw away, his eyes snapped open and blue stared into gold for the briefest moment. And then he coughed as the water was expelled from his lungs. She leaned back on her heels as he sat up on one arm, drawing deep, ragged gasps, his other arm across the ruin that was his stomach. His eyes were narrowed, accusing in a way, as he stared at her. She met his gaze without much difficulty this time, but remained quiet as her demeanor calmed, saying nothing, giving nothing, and neither did he. Relieved though she was, the distance between them had not diminished. If anything, she felt as if it was somehow more desolate than before. There was a line that should not be crossed and when one of them dared, the outcome was all the bleaker for it because nothing could come from any attempt. And when Sesshomaru stood, somehow able to still find his never failing grace and agility in spite of his grievous wounds, she felt a rough mixture of resignation and sudden regret. 

Kagome's voice broke the silence. "You should be careful," she told him. "Those wounds are serious." 

Inuyasha gave a soft snort. "He doesn't care if he almost bit it. He's probably more pissed that he got his neck saved by a girl than being stabbed through the back. Fuck, Sesshomaru! What were you thinking? That was really stupid."

If looks could kill....

Fortunately for Inuyasha, Sesshomaru evidently did not wish to kill anything today, or perhaps he simply didn't have the energy. The glare of black death that promised a swift end at some point in the immediate future was all the hanyou earned for now before Sesshomaru turned and began striding away with those ever measured, characteristic steps of his, the mokomoko once again slung over his shoulder to sway behind him. Lucidity watched him for several moments before peering over at Kagome and Inuyasha, the latter of whom seemed to be sweating under his collar. 

"You two okay?" she asked.

Kagome nodded. "Yeah...yeah, we're fine. What happened?"

Lucidity opened her mouth to respond, but stopped when a shadow fell over them. Looking up, she spotted the unmistakable form of Ah-Un gliding across the sky. In front, holding the reins and his Staff, was Jaken, gazing down at what remained of the field, before he caught sight of his master and urged Ah-Un ahead.

"Sesshomaru-sama!" he called. "Where are you going now? What happened here? Don't leave me behind! Sesshomaru-sama?"

The moment Ah-Un landed, Jaken jumped down and raced after the daiyoukai. Meanwhile, the other two passengers Ah-Un carried were slower to dismount, taking in both the devastation and the unexpected appearance of a particular gaijin. Miroku stood with his mouth slightly ajar while Sango, dressed in her slayer attire and clutching Hiraikotsu, began to smile.

Lucidity looked back at the priestess and hanyou. "We should leave; there is nothing more we can do here. Once we get settled elsewhere, I'll tell you all everything."

* * *

Stars stretched across the sky in a thick, glittering blanket, and thin strip of light remained on the edge of the horizon. Birds and animals had gone to sleep for the night and the insects had emerged, bringing with them the soothing chorus of their songs. The campfire snapped and popped, shooting up sparks, while Lucidity stirred the logs with a stick. No one else seemed to have the presence of mind to separate the bits of wood and allow the fire room to breathe. The flames burned higher and the heat spread through the air that was steadily growing colder with the coming night.

True to her word, she recounted the whole story to the others, from what took place on the Isle to what happened in the cavern. The pertinent facts anyway; no need to reveal any unnecessary and personal details. For the most part, they listened in silence, especially Jaken, who obviously hadn't been informed of anything and hung on her every word. There were moments where she was asked to stop and clarify, such as being killed by the Sisters for one, and then when she had to explain in further detail the trials the Mother had put forth for her. There was much to talk about, much that had happened, and it took such a short amount of time that she was surprised that night had not completely fallen yet once she was finished.

She pushed the logs a bit further apart before laying the stick down and peering up at her captive audience. Three humans, a hanyou, and an imp were staring at her in perfect stillness, each wearing similar expressions of pensive wonder. The daiyoukai was predictably absent from this little gathering, sitting on the other side of the lake the group was camped next to, creating enough distance that, even with his sharp ears, he would not be able to hear their discussion. The thought of him was constantly in the back of her mind and she gazed across the expanse of water to see him in the same place he had sat down when they first arrived, relaxing against a cluster of boulders, his fur surrounding him. The single detail that had changed was the dragon laying nearby, by all appearances deep asleep.

"So...so you were never really human," came Miroku's voice in the stillness. "Those spiritual abilities of yours came from this Mother Goddess who sired you?"

"Looks that way," Lucidity said, glancing at him. "I told you that you were mistaken about that."

"Yes, well, being the offspring of a goddess was not a possibility that crossed my mind," he replied, his gaze distant, if not a bit dazed. "The meaning of this...is astonishing to consider."

"It's a lot to take in," agreed Kagome in a soft murmur.

"I don't know if I can," said Sango.

Lucidity smiled, a bit derisively. "Think how I feel. Imagine what it's like to learn that your entire life was determined before you were born, that everything you've been brought up to believe has been turned inside out, and everything you've known to be true is a lie. And now you're expected to carry the balance of life and death of this world on your shoulders when you can hardly maintain your own existence as it is? Yeah, it's a lot to take in. When I listen to myself telling you all this, I can hardly believe my own words."

"Can't really blame yah for hiding out on the Isle," Inuyasha said. "But you know you can't go back after what happened today, right? You can't sit this one out."

"I know," Lucidity said. "Why do you think I left in the first place?"

"What did you do to cause Sesshomaru-sama leave?" piped up a new voice.

Lips thinning into a frown, she peered over at Jaken, not bothering to hide her disapproval, even as he glared at her, arms folded. "So presumptuous. But if he hasn't told you, why would I?"

Kagome leaned forward suddenly. "I don't understand. How _does_ Sesshomaru factor into this?"

"He...." Lucidity trailed off with a sigh and shook her head in a measure of defeat. Flexing her hand, she finally lifted it, palm out to reveal the seven-pointed star. "The first day we left the village, the Mother marked us both. We didn't understand what it meant until we came to the Isle, but She named him my protector. She wanted me kept alive. The mark burns whenever I'm in danger."

All around, eyes widened. Some jaws even dropped.

"That's...that's how he knew about the samurai," whispered Sango.

Lucidity nodded as she lowered her arm.

"But why would he leave if he's supposed to protect you?" asked Kagome.

"Are you kidding me?" Inuyasha blurted out. "This is Sesshomaru we're talking about. He must have hated being coerced, even if-" Without warning, he fell silent and darted an anxious glance at Lucidity, who frowned.

"If what, Inuyasha?" pressed Miroku.

"Eh...." the hanyou mumbled, folding his arms and looking away. "Sesshomaru is different from how he used to be, but not by much. He still wouldn't want to be bothered with protecting someone, no matter who they were."

Lucidity realized then and there that Inuyasha had never once mentioned what he came across that day when he'd been sent to look for her. And from the nervous shifting of Jaken, he hadn't revealed the intimate knowledge he carried either. The others could only exchange uncertain glances.

"But...what about what he did down in the cavern?" Kagome muttered.

A sharp jolt at the reminder had Lucidity rubbing her chest and, once more, she peered across the lake, brow furrowed, and swallowed slightly. "Never mind what goes on in his head," she said.

"Yeah," Inuyasha immediately agreed. "There are more important things to worry about. What about this power source of yours? If we find it, we'll have a better chance at defeating the evil that's coming. Have you tried going to that Seer again?"

No, she hadn't and didn't want to either. It wasn't as if she needed help reaching Kaidame this time, but the previous visit made her less than willing to try it a second time. Perhaps she should, with so much at stake. What more could she lose to that crazy owl? It wasn't as if she had any silver left to offer. Resisting the urge to touch her throat, she helped Inuyasha steer the conversation to the more serious topic of the blackness and the threat it posed, where it was now, what that scream was when it had been driven into retreat, because none of them were willing to accept that it had been defeated.

The darkness of the night became more oppressive and more wood was added to the fire. Food was passed around, which Lucidity declined, and all the while she listened for an opening, some sort of way to convince Kagome and Inuyasha, Sango and Miroku, to return to the village. But no opportunity presented itself. She knew they were all worried about the family and people they had left behind. Yet it seemed as if the attack on their home had convinced them to find the root cause of the threat, rather than trim the resulting rot. And, though she had considered departing earlier, she couldn't bring herself to abandon her friends, not even if it meant being near Sesshomaru.

And soon, the conversation slowly died away as, one by one, they fell to sleep. Jaken had ventured back to the other side of the lake some time ago and, soon, only Lucidity and Inuyasha remained awake, the former staring quietly into the fire. Inuyasha rested a hand on Kagome, who lay with her head next to his leg, and watched her as she drifted off. Out of the corner of her eye, Lucidity saw him lift his head and glance over at Miroku and Sango, then at her.

"I don't know what happened between you and my pain in the ass brother," he said and she looked over him, none too surprised that he'd seized his chance to talk openly. "And I don't care. But as much as I hate to admit it, we could really use your help. It's the same reason we're traveling with Sesshomaru. You think you guys can handle being around each other?"

"We're good at keeping quiet and ignoring people," she said.

He snorted. "You know what I mean."

"I know," she replied. "And I don't plan on going anywhere. After everything you all have done for me, it's the least I can do. Besides," she added, brushing a hand through her hair and closing her eyes. "You lot are the closest thing I have to family. I may not be able to return to the village with you, but I'm not about to leave any of you vulnerable."

"Hmph!"

She looked over, a scowl pulling at her lips. "You know, it's not easy admitting something like that. Try not to be such an asshole about it."

"I'm never going to change, so get used to it," Inuyasha said. "But that's not it. I think I finally figured out why Kagome and Sango took such a liking to you."

Her brows rose. "Bonds of womanhood, perhaps?"

He shook his head. "No, it's because you're a stray and women like taking care of strays. You're unwanted. No one accepted you other than your old man, right? And when he died, you lost your home. Now you're just trying to carve out a place of your own."

For a long moment, Lucidity stared at him. She might be mistaken, but she was pretty sure that Inuyasha just shared something that could be construed as personal. The scenario he described sounded as if it had not only come from her life, but his own. That must have been what it was like for him after his mother had died. Shaking her head, she muttered, "[Bloody hell,] Inuyasha, being insightful is really unnerving coming from you."

He grinned. "I'm not a dumb dog like most people think."

"Eh...whatever you say," she said with a shrug. "I mean, I've seen Kagome use those beads on you too often after you've been running your mouth or doing something spectacularly stupid. But, really, it's important that you believe you aren't dumb."

"I also never liked you," he added, glowering.

"I know," she said, without batting an eye.

"You can be a real bitch sometimes."

She presented him with a lazy middle finger and grinned slightly. "And you're a real jerk, so that makes us even."

He snorted. "Yeah, sure." Folding his arms, he glared at her for a space of a heartbeat, and then his lips curved upward. "Get some rest, why don't yah? You'll be useless if you don't get any sleep."

"Ah, I forgot to mention: I don't sleep."

Inuyasha blinked. "You don't?"

She shook her head. "I might, eventually. Once a season perhaps, from what I understand. But I haven't slept in weeks. How about you get some sleep instead? I can keep watch."

"Er...fine by me, I guess. I mean, if you actually can't sleep," he said, and that was all the prompting he needed. He stretched his arms above his head with a groan before he lay down behind Kagome, draping an arm over her, and leaving Lucidity with a fresh pang of envy that had her questioning how well she would actually cope with being in the presence of a youkai lord for the unforeseen future.

It was not long before she was surrounded by the soft snores of the others. Her father had been able to shake windows with the snores he'd been capable of and being in the midst of so many sleeping individuals was an odd comfort. She must have been terribly deprived of decent company, to find such ease with simply watching and listening to people snore. Yet, whatever the reason, she enjoyed it and sat in their midst for a long while, thoughts drifting, focusing on nothing in particular until, once again, she found herself peering across the lake.

He still hadn't moved; not even a muscle was budged out of place. Jaken was resting against Ah-Un. Everything was quiet. And Sesshomaru was grievously injured. To what extent, she couldn't be certain, but she did know that daiyoukai were not invulnerable. The story of the Inu no Taisho's demise was proof enough. After a quick glance around, she carefully rose to her feet and walked a few paces before dissolving her form. The water rippled at her passing and the grass billowed gently as she brushed over Jaken and Ah-Un, neither of whom stirred, before she came to a stop some yards in front of Sesshomaru, her solid feet touching the ground as she gazed down at him. Both his legs were stretched out before him, his back against the boulder, and one arm draped over his stomach and the other resting on the furs of the mokomoko. His breathing was deep and even, features relaxed, completely at ease in his slumber. He was still covered in blood; he hadn't even bothered to clean his hands of it. He must be terribly exhausted to sleep so soundly, without any care to prevent predators to come lurking, even if they were little more than irksome creatures to him. Having satisfied herself that he was alive, if not kicking, she turned away, intent upon spending the remainder of the night on the other side of the lake, only to stop when a voice rumbled softly behind her.

"What are you doing here?"

Perhaps not so exhausted, then. Stealing herself, she turned back and met the gaze of the daiyoukai peering up at her. "I came to check on you."

"That isn't necessary," said Sesshomaru, expression ever stoic and his tone indecipherable.

She shrugged. "For my peace of mind, it is. The thing that stabbed you has poisoned humans and youkai alike. It could do the same to you."

"I am not weak as those who have succumbed to its effects," was the haughty reply. "And as I said, it is no concern of yours."

A fist clenched at her side and her jaw worked as she looked at him, at the indifferent countenance that revealed nothing beyond the regal youkai lord. "You do not tell me what is or is not my concern," she said, stepping closer. "You were impulsive and you know. Your actions nearly cost you. And I'll be damned if you tell me otherwise when I was the one who pulled you out of the water and breathed life back into your body."

The anger in the lines of his face was more than evident to Lucidity as he peered up at her, the fingers twitching against his bloodied haori before growing still; she would not have been surprised if he had intended to unleash the Whip on her. "You are the one who put an end to our alliance," he said. "By those conditions, this is none of your business."

"I gave you a choice!" she hissed, and her fury was such that an unexpected spark of energy brought a rush of wind around them, but she paid it no mind, nor the imp who jolted awake with a groggy exclamation of surprise. "And you chose to leave, Sesshomaru. That was your decision, not mine! You're the one who left, not me!"

He was on his feet, his own temper a quiet one that simmered beneath the surface in his burning gaze and had Jaken scurrying for safety. "You forced the decision and tell me not to return unless I give you what you want. I do not bow to the will of others, not even yours."

"Dammit, I'm not asking you to bow!" Lucidity snapped. "Just respect me as your partner. That's all I want. Is that too much to ask from the great daiyoukai of the west?"

Sesshomaru took a step forward. "You-" he began. And then, all of a sudden, he broke off. His eyes grew wide, imperceptibly at first, until he suddenly dropped to one knee, an arm tight around his stomach, and his face paling to a ghostly hue.

The alarm in his features drew Lucidity's fear to the surface faster than his labored breathing and she was down on her knees in front of him, gripping his shoulders as he fell forward onto one hand. "Sesshomaru, what is it? What's wrong?" she asked, panic twisting in her gut like a vile serpent she was desperately trying to keep under control. "Come on, talk to me!" Yet he didn't. He lowered his head, drawing in deep, rattling breaths that sent shocks of terror through her before he unexpectedly pitched forward. She caught him, heart pounding hard inside her chest, her own breath echoing in her ears. "Sesshomaru?!" He was nothing but a boneless heap as she turned him onto his back in her arms and his head slid to a stop against her chest, his eyes closed, and she cried out his name one more time to no avail.

"SESSHOMARU!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaahh, good ol' drama, tentative friendships, and my best friends who are cliffhangers! I repent nothing!


	36. Chapter 36

"What happened?" 

"He-he just collapsed. I don't...I don't know. I-" 

"Put him down; let me look at him." 

Kagome's voice was patient, but firm and Lucidity did as she was instructed. So much for not giving in to blind panic because, in this instance, she was completely useless. Her mind was in utter disarray. She knew how to help him breathe again, but this...this she didn't know. She didn't know what to do! She hadn't been able to think, only shout. And her shouts had roused the others; she hadn't even been calling for help, just the daiyoukai's name. But now everyone was here, standing over the prone figure that was Sesshomaru-or in Jaken's case openly weeping-while Kagome loosened the sash around his waist. She set his swords, along with a small, drawstring pouch Lucidity had never seen before, aside before opening his haori. Though his injuries were well known, there was a collective gasp at the sight of the gaping wounds that would have been fatal for a human, perhaps even for a youkai, powerful or not. Lucidity's hands went to her mouth and, gritting her teeth, she swallowed down the noise rising in her throat. She had no idea what the noise could be, just that she knew she didn't want to make it. She stared, transfixed, at the shredded flesh and muscle, at the old blood and the black veins that were creeping outward from the open wound. 

Inuyasha swore and turned away. "Goddamn moron!" he snarled and suddenly bounded back to the camp. 

Miroku knelt down beside Kagome, whose focus was solely upon the injury, and held his hand over the daiyoukai. "There are vile forces at work here," he said. "Perhaps we might be able to purify the infection, keep it from spreading or at least slow it down." 

"Do you think that's possible?" asked Kagome.

"It's worth a try," Miroku said. 

"Can you not cure him completely?" Sango asked, leaning over her husband. 

"No, it's too potent. Slowing it down will be difficult enough and even then I don't know if we will have much luck," was the remorseful reply. "Give us some room to work for now and-Inuyasha?" 

With a pack clutched in his hands, Inuyasha had returned and thrust the item at Kagome. "Use whatever is in here that will help," he ordered, brow drawn and a scowl on his lips. 

"I don't know if anything will," said Kagome as she took the pack. "Maybe the medicine we've used for you might do some good, but-" 

"Medicine!" shrieked Jaken, smacking the butt of his Staff on the ground. "You stupid hanyou! Sesshomaru-sama has no need for human remedies. He is too strong for such inadequate treatment!" 

"Shut it, toad, before I fry you with your own stick!" shouted Inuyasha, raising a fist. 

Jaken lifted the stick in question and turned it so that the old man faced the hanyou. 

"Cleaning the wounds won't hurt, Jaken," Kagome said in a calm, reassuring tone. "We're going to do everything that we can to help him, all right? Just let us work without interruption, okay? That's goes for everyone. You, too, Lucidity," she added. "I know you've had some training, but it's best if me and Miroku handle this." 

While Jaken stalked away with a sharp "hmph!" and his nose in the air, Lucidity could only nod. It was a relief, giving someone else the reins, not being the one who had to make any decisions, because she sure as hell didn't know what to decide right now. Peering down at Sesshomaru was like staring into the face of a nightmare. His skin was naturally fair, but now there was a sickly cast to his features. His lips were parted and the sound of his ragged panting could be heard by all. Beads of sweat were gathering on his forehead and trickling into his hairline. Without thought, she leaned forward on one hand and the other came to rest against his cheek. His skin was warmer than usual and she bit down on her lip, shifting closer, his name on the tip of her tongue once more, when fingers touched the back of her hand. She looked up and met the gentle gaze of the priestess, who smiled at her too knowingly. 

"It's okay," Kagome said. "We'll help him; don't worry. But I need you to give us some space right now." 

It took a moment, but Lucidity nodded again and rose to her feet. Her legs were weak from shock, but she put one foot in front of the other, helped along by Sango, who guided her with a hand on the small of her back, over to the lake where Inuyasha stood, his arms folded and his hard glare on the water. A quick glance around revealed that Jaken was by Ah-Un, awake and watching the monk and priestess who were kneeling over his master. 

"Are you all right, Lucidity?" Sango asked. 

"Fine," was her automatic response. "Just...that scared me, was all. I wasn't expecting him to pass out on me like that." 

"I'll say," Sango replied. "I didn't know you were capable of sounding so frantic." 

Lucidity couldn't do anything but shrug, and then glanced over at Inuyasha for an excuse not to look Sango directly in the eye. "How're you doing over there?" 

"What the hell do you think?" muttered the hanyou.

"Inuyasha!" Sango chided.

"It's fine," Lucidity said. "It was a dumb question."

Inuyasha snorted and stalked away further up the lake.

"Guess we should leave him alone," murmured Sango as she lowered herself onto the bank. "He and Sesshomaru don't exactly share a close bond, but they're still brothers. And a lot has changed, despite what Inuyasha says. If anything were to happen to Sesshomaru, it will hit him harder than he'll ever admit. But I sometimes wonder how Sesshomaru would handle it if something happened to Inuyasha."

Lucidity, who was watching the hanyou kick a rock into the water, glanced over at the daemon slayer to find the woman looking up at her expectantly. "I...I'm not sure," she admitted. "We've never talked about it, but I guess.... Maybe he'd be mad that Inuyasha got himself killed, especially if it was by someone Sesshomaru considered to be weak."

Sango nodded. "That sounds about right. He'd probably take revenge on principle, at least."

Lucidity made a soft noise of agreement in the back of her throat as she folded her arms and peered over at Miroku and Kagome. Calmer though she was, she was far from relaxed and dug her heel into the dirt to keep herself from pacing or tapping her foot or displaying any of those nervous ticks most people were prone to in these situations. She desperately wanted to go back over there, but knew her presence would just be a hindrance. She couldn't even hover as nothing more than a gentle breeze because Kagome would know. But being on the sidelines, while Sesshomaru was unconscious and so gravely wounded that he.... Fuck! She didn't want to think about it! She didn't want to imagine, didn't want to consider-

"Lucidity."

The woman jerked her head up at the sound of her name, only to pause when she realized she was biting down, and rather hard at that, on her thumbnail. Not to mention the wind that was billowing around them. It stopped the moment she lowered her arm and peered over at Sango, who was gazing at her anxiously, a furrow in her brow and frown on her lips, before patting the spot beside her. "Come sit," she said.

Lucidity glanced at the proffered bit of grass and shook her head.

"It would be better if you relaxed," Sango coaxed. "Your control was slipping and that won't help anyone, least of all Sesshomaru. Just sit down and try to calm yourself."

Lucidity sat, reluctantly, and folded her arms once more. It was doubtful that being on the ground would make any difference, especially when the hum of energy from the priestess and monk pulled her attention back to the pair and the daiyoukai between them. There was no telling if this would work. And even still, it was a temporary fix. What they needed was a cure, but no one knew really knew what the blackness was, let alone how to defeat it. But could it be possible that Sesshomaru was strong enough to overcome the infection? Did he need to get worse before he got better? Lucidity bit down on her lip. If only they could find out more about the blackness. Maybe another trip to Kaidame was best option. She would gladly confront the bird to find a cure. As her gaze swept over the quiet figure of the daiyoukai, she knew she would trade anything to help him. Anything.

A hand touching her knee startled her from her thoughts and she looked over at Sango and her warm expression filled with sympathy. Or perhaps pity, as if she was sorry that her friend had such poor taste in men. "It's okay," the daemon slayer said. "He'll be fine. You'll see. He's too stubborn to die." 

"Too...stubborn?" Lucidity repeated, the familiar words stirring something in the back of her mind. And then she remembered: Sesshomaru had said them before. No, she had. And he had agreed. It had made her laugh then. And now she almost laughed again, but the sound caught somewhere in her throat and she suddenly covered her face with her hands and pulled her knees up to her chest. A much different sound bubbled up from her throat and she couldn't stop it this time, not when Sango shifted to sit next to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Lucidity fell like a hapless child into the embrace, hating herself for it and at the same time unwilling to restrain herself, and trembled as she sobbed into Sango's chest. Both the woman's arms were around her now and she cried with an abandonment she had not succumbed to in ages, not even with the one she wept for in this moment. And she wept for so much, too much, and couldn't stop. Sango never said a word, but held her in perfect silence, one hand stroking her hair, over and over, a soothing lull that no one had done to her in years. Such a simple thing that she never realized had been missing until she was gradually able to quiet her sobs and lay there, her head on Sango's chest, tears continuing to course down her cheeks. 

"So...you and Sesshomaru, huh?" Sango whispered after a while. 

Lucidity wiped at her face, having to sniff to clear her airways, but she didn't know what to say. The answer was beyond obvious and there was no point in denying anything, but she certainly didn't want to talk about it. Sango, however, did it for her. 

"I figured something was going on, when I heard how he was injured. That and a few others things. But something happened? Something that caused a rift between you two?" 

"Sango, please," Lucidity finally murmured. "I don't want to talk, not right now." 

"Okay, but when you are, I'm here." 

"Me too," said a new voice and Lucidity pulled back from Sango and looked up to find Kagome standing over them, leaning forward with hands on her knees and a soft smile on her lips. "He's stable for now," the priestess continued without being prompted as Miroku came over to join them. "I wasn't able to purify the infection very well. But Miroku and I were able to isolate the dark energy inside. It was strange; we could barely feel the energy until we started working on it, but we were able to get it contained. The barrier we used, though, won't last forever. I'm not sure how long exactly. This is new territory for us. Usually a barrier like this is for keeping youkai out, not to keep something in them from getting out. It might make him weak, too, slower to heal, but it's better than letting the infection become worse." 

"But we're still looking at borrowed time," said Inuyasha as he walked over, apparently having heard every word with those keen ears of his. 

Kagome nodded. "I'm afraid so. Until we find a permanent solution, we should take him back to the village, behind the wards where it's safer. He shouldn't be left out in the open like this, not with all the enemies he has." 

"The Viper Clan would no doubt seize such an opportunity to kill him," said Miroku. 

"What if they were to attack the village to get to him while we were away?" asked Sango as she stood. "They have powerful magic when it comes to barriers. Couldn't they break through?" 

Wrinkles appeared in the monk's forehead as he frowned. "A possibility I had not considered. That does present a problem." 

"What should we do?" asked Kagome. 

There were uncertain looks all around. Yet Lucidity, drying the last of her tears, rose to her feet and brushed herself off. She felt drained, but surprisingly calm with a clear head; she'd forgotten about some of the positive effects that a good, long cry could have. And the solution to this new problem was beyond simple. "The Isle," she said and the group turned to her as one. "We can take him to the Isle. No one can set foot on the land without my permission." 

For a moment, everyone stared. And then Kagome clapped her hands together and beamed. "Perfect!" 

"Sounds too perfect," said Inuyasha. "You sure about that?" 

"From all accounts, yes," Lucidity replied. 

"What accounts are those?" asked Miroku. 

"The Four Sisters, for one," she answered. "Rusuban, the caretaker, told me as much. And there are records in the library, journals of the previous Guardian, where she mentioned in passing about enemies failing to find her home. And she also used the Isle as refuge for people in need."

"Wait, you have journals that talk about the Guardian's enemies?" Kagome asked. "Have any of them mentioned something like what we saw today?" 

"Is it possible that any of them could?" added Miroku. 

"I...haven't come across anything, but...it's...it's possible," murmured Lucidity, stunned that she hadn't considered this before. And at the same time, doubt weighed at her mind. "But," she added. "A lot of the journals are in different languages. I don't know how much use they can be." 

"We should still look," said Miroku. "I, for one, am fascinated by the potential knowledge they could hold." 

"So long as it's useful," Sango told him. "You can't waste time reading at your leisure about ancient brothels." 

"I would not, my dearest wife," sighed the monk as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "That you would think me capable of such sordid behavior wounds me."  

Inuyasha scoffed. "Whatever, damn lecher. But it's settled. We leave first thing in the morning." 

Though she kept her gaze on the resting-no, the unconscious, she amended-silhouette of the daiyoukai and the imp who had gone over to kneel at his side, Lucidity was listening with half an ear. "We could leave now," she suggested.

"What? But it's the middle of the night," Kagome said. "I know you're worried about Sesshomaru, but it will take days to reach any destination."

"Yeah, and unlike some of us, we actually need to sleep at some point," said Inuyasha.

Lucidity turned to look at the assorted group gathered around her. "Rusuban told me, before I left, that the Guardians devised faster routes home, as their duties could sometimes take them to other parts of the world," she said. "So, when I say that we could leave now, I mean we can get there now."

The three humans and hanyou glanced at one another, surprise etched across their faces. And, in spite of their decision to bring Sesshomaru to the Isle, Lucidity could see an underlining reluctance in their expressions upon learning that they could be there in a matter minutes. She sighed. "Whatever you decide, do it soon," she told them as she started towards the daiyoukai. "I'm taking him with me no matter what."

Inuyasha caught her by the shoulder. "Not happening. You ain't taking him anywhere without us."

She raised a brow and shrugged off his hand. "Then get your shit packed already."

They went to get their shit packed, and Lucidity made her way over to Sesshomaru. Jaken lifted his head at her approach, but rather than greet her with any scornful disdain, he merely gazed up at her, tears in his too large of eyes, his entire demeanor drenched in despair. His shoulders drooped as he let out a heavy sigh and looked back at Sesshomaru, who was still pale, still laboring to breathe, and still very much unconscious. His haori was tied back in place. The blood had been cleaned from his hands and she noticed his fingers twitching and there was slight crease in his brow as she knelt beside Jaken. Without a word, she reached out and touched the back of her hand to Sesshomaru's cheek.

"He's burning up," she murmured, chest constricting, while Jaken let out a soft keen, rubbing a sleeve over his watering eyes. She pulled her hand back and glanced down at the imp. "You've never seen him like this before, have you?"

"N-no," came the nasally reply.

As Sango had done with her, she placed an arm over Jaken's shoulders and felt him stiffen in response. "I'm sorry," she offered, but expected him to lash out or at least knock her hand away at any moment. But when the shoulders merely slumped beneath her touch, she squeezed very gently and heard another keen in response, along with a fresh wave of weeping. Jaken really wasn't so bad. If only he would stop trying to torch people.

"Oi! Would you stop crying over his corpse already and man up, yah damn toad!"

Not that she couldn't blame Jaken sometimes, watching him jump to his feet then and there and snatch up the Staff. Yet before any more insults or threats could be made, Inuyasha crouched down beside Sesshomaru.

"What do you think you're doing?!" demanded Jaken as the others returned, laden with packs and weapons. "Don't you touch him, you filthy hanyou!"

"Keh! Fuck off, stupid imp!" Inuyasha sneered, and then gathered his brother up and lifted him onto his back. "Gees, he's going to be fucking pissed if he ever finds out I had to haul his ass around."

"Maybe if it was Lucidity, he won't be as angry," suggested Kagome.

"Doesn't matter," said Inuyasha. "He'll be furious either way, knowing everyone has seen him like this. Hey!" he added, turning his attention onto Lucidity. "Aren't you supposed to be opening some Guardian pathway or something?"

Rolling her eyes, she stood, only to be stopped when Jaken suddenly grabbed her sleeve to keep her level with him.

"What's going on?" he asked. 

"We're taking him somewhere safe," she replied and those large eyes became even larger. Instantly the imp seemed to perk at the idea and hurried forward to collect Bakusaiga and Tenseiga that were still on the ground, along with that curious drawstring pouch, before promptly rushing over to Ah-Un and seizing the reins of the dragon. Lucidity shifted her gaze from the two youkai over to the Inu brothers, one who was watching her impatiently and the other...well, she didn't look for long before making her way over to the lake and crouching down at its edge. Any body of water, Rusuban had said, whether it was connected to another channel or not. As she stared out at the serene surface, she decided she could not fathom all the ways of magic and the reasons for it, or if there was a reason, just as there was no clear reason as to how life had begun. Perhaps the Mother was the answer for her own existence and the existence of this world. But what of the Mother's existence? What created Her? What had started everything? Questions that could never be answered. But here, in this moment, she wanted an answer to only one question: how to save Sesshomaru? 

The surface of the lake rippled as she dipped her hand into the water and allowed a small flow of energy to travel outward, causing the ripples to grow and churn. "Hahaoya no Shikyu," she whispered, "I'm ready to return." 

Nothing happened. 

Lucidity did not break the connection and kept her gaze straight ahead, watching the shifting water that stretched across the lake, reaching the far bank. Behind her, she could hear footsteps and soon caught sight of a red hakama on one side of her and the familiar pattern of Sango's kimono on the other. The energy continued to spread and she strengthened it, biting down on her lip and wondering. She began to doubt that Rusuban had instructed her properly. Perhaps the old woman forgot to tell her about another step in the process or maybe she, Lucidity, had messed up somehow. Whatever the case was, if this didn't work, if she'd had Sesshomaru moved for no reason.... 

"What's that?" Kagome suddenly asked, pointing.

A mist had appeared, rolling along the lake as if a spring shower of rain was slowly making its way towards them. The mist thickened, growing denser, darker, and Lucidity stood and took a step back. Droplets fell her fingers as she stared at heavy fog now coming right at them and she could hear the soft "plop" of something being lifted and dropped into the water in a steady rhythm. And then a form emerged, long and wooden, gliding soundlessly, and steered by two small women, one gold and one silver. The boat bumped to a stop before the group and the servants peered up at the people gathered. 

"My Lady," they greeted in unison and even mirrored one another in their bows. 

"Creepy," muttered Inuyasha. 

Lucidity silently agreed. 

"Are all these people permitted to come with you to the Isle, my Lady?" the gold servant asked. 

"Yes. The imp and dragon, too," she said, glancing over her shoulder at Jaken. "You will have to follow on Ah-Un." 

"Everyone, please board my Lady's vessel," said the silver servant. 

Lucidity wondered, as she sat by Kagome, if the boat was somehow procured with the number of people in mind. They were able to sit comfortably side-by-side on the rows of seats, though Inuyasha remained on his feet, and there was still plenty of room. Only Ah-Un would not have been able to fit. What would happen if a much larger quantity of people needed passage? The Guardian had often written about bringing humans to her Isle, that they would come and go as they pleased, but there hadn't been any detail on how they traveled to and from the Isle. And if the Guardian was able to return to the Isle from any point on the planet, needing only a body of water as a means, was it possible for the Guardian to travel directly to a destination from the Isle? A question for later, she decided, as the servants pushed off and guided the boat back into the fog. Overhead, Ah-Un swooped in low beside them, Jaken upon his back. 

* * *

"This is...insane." 

"It's massive, is what it is. I can't remember the last time I've seen one so huge. And it's aura! Remarkable! Like a breath of life itself!" 

"But what's wrong with it? It looks like it's weeping all over the ground." 

"Ugh! Yeah, I just stepped in some of it." 

Lucidity stared up at the billowing branches of the Hahaoya no Shikyu and frowned at the trunk that was glistening with a steady secretion of sap, not unlike how the wall in the cave was secreting that disgusting, black goop. Was it some sort of reaction to the request of coming home? Or maybe to the blackness itself? But that didn't make sense, since the blackness had been active for months, it seemed like. She glanced over at the others, who all had their heads craned back to take in the sight of the great tree. Well, except for Kagome, who was busy trying to wipe her foot clean on the grass. 

"I actually have never seen this happen before," announced a new voice.  "It's quite curious."

Kagome let out a shriek of surprise when the ground near her shifted without warning and darted over to Inuyasha as the thin form of an old woman rose up. 

"Rusuban," Lucidity greeted.

The caretaker shook out her wiry hair and graced everyone with a broad smile before bowing. "I'm so glad that you have returned safely, my Lady. Although...."  She trailed off as she approached Inuyasha, rubbing her chin thoughtfully, and considered the unconscious youkai lord on his back. "Your Protector doesn't seem to be doing well. No doubt the reason for your return. Shall we see him inside then?"

"Go look after something else, old woman," Inuyasha said with a sneer. "We don't need your help."

Before Kagome could even so much as open her mouth to reprimand his husband, Lucidity was there and snatched one of his furry ears between her fingers and yanked. Hard.

"Owowowowowow! What are you doing? OW! STOP!"

With Inuyasha barely maintaining his balance on one foot and managing to keep a firm grip on his brother simultaneously, Lucidity brought her face close to his, eyes narrowed and expression tight with anger, and was satisfied at the sight of him looking downright nervous. "Never," she bit out, "ever fucking disrespect Rusuban or any of the girls here, Inuyasha, or I will drop your lily white ass into the ocean and make you swim back to shore. This is my household and you will do well to remember that. Do you understand?"

"Fine, I won't-ow, fuck! Let go already! I'm about to drop your precious Sesshomaru here if you don't stop!" Inuyasha shouted.

Lucidity just about smacked him. Scowling, she yanked her hand back and glared at the hanyou, before turning on her heel and striding up the steps to the veranda. Behind her, she heard a growl, then a snort, followed by a soft, "Bitch."

"Inuyasha!" Kagome exclaimed. "Don't-"

"Jerk," Lucidity called over her shoulder, glancing back to see the startled and confused expression on Kagome's face and the stubborn, albeit mutual understanding on Inuyasha's. An apology, a truce, she didn't know for certain. But she did know that there was a begrudging acceptance between her and the hanyou. They wished to protect the same people and that alone made them allies, if not...friends. She turned away and led the group across the veranda, where she opened the heavy wooden door and let the others step in before her, along with Rusuban and Jaken who brought up the rear.

"Where to now?" Inuyasha asked.

"I'll show you," Lucidity said as she eased her way to the front.

"My Lady?" Rusuban called. "Shall I take the rest of your guests and get them settled in while you tend to your Protector?"

"I'm coming with you," Kagome said at once, hurrying forward.

Lucidity nodded and glanced over at Miroku, Sango, and Jaken. "Do what you will," she told them.

It wasn't a surprise that Jaken came with them. Yet Miroku and Sango left with Rusuban, their voices echoing down the hall while Lucidity led the rest in the opposite direction. She glanced back once, but caught only a brief glimpse of the daiyoukai before she had to round a corner and head through another doorway that led into what she considered the private wing of the Guardian. "How is he doing, Inuyasha?" she asked upon reaching the entrance to the chambers and stepping inside.

"Still out cold," was the predictable response, until she heard, "I think he might be drooling on me...."

Lucidity paused with her hand on the sliding door on the other side of the den. "You...better not mention that when he wakes up," she muttered.

Inuyasha snorted. "I don't have a death wish."

"Well, it doesn't matter," Kagome piped up as Lucidity rolled open the door and continued into the alcove. "That's sweat, not drool, Inuyasha; he has a serious fever."

The knots in her stomach returned, to the point of nausea, and another keen could be heard from Jaken, one that Inuyasha did not reprimand him for this time. With the four-poster bed in sight, Inuyasha walked across the room and deposited Sesshomaru onto the many blankets and pillows. Yet he didn't simply dump his brother and be done with it. It really was something else, witnessing the hanyou slowly lower Sesshomaru onto the bed, and then turn around, keeping a hand on him the whole time, and took care to lay him down onto the furs. Kagome came forward then and proceeded to remove the mokomoko from his shoulder so that it trailed off the bed and onto the floor. Gods, Inuyasha was right, Lucidity thought as Kagome untied the sash and slid it off, followed by the haori. Sesshomaru was seriously going to be fucking pissed when he learned what when on. He was essentially being undressed while his brother and servant watched. Kagome was even taking his boots off.

Yet it had to be done, Lucidity knew, as Kagome put the back of her hand to Sesshomaru's forehead, her expression tense with worry. "He's really hot," the priestess murmured. "I don't know if it will do much good, but I will start making him strong doses of the medicine I have for fevers. I guess for infections, too. I can only hope it helps. And water, too, as cold as possible. He needs to stay hydrated, but he'll also need cold compressors."

"I'm on it!" Jaken announced and pelted out the door. And so anxious was the imp that he actually dropped everything he was carrying right onto the floor in his haste. Lucidity stared after him a moment before she stooped to pick up the swords, Staff, and the drawstring pouch. Along with her own sword, she laid the weapons on the far table, save for Hogosha, which she found easier to keep on her person, just in case. 

Meanwhile, Inuyasha was scratching his cheek and frowning. "I thought Jaken didn't 't know his way around here." 

"As worried as he is about Sesshomaru, he'll figure it out," Kagome said. "I'm sure-Oh! Lucidity? What...er...?" She trailed off as Lucidity, having stepped away from the table, approached the other side of the bed and skimmed her fingers over the furred blankets near Sesshomaru's arm, peering down at the daiyoukai with a heavy frown on her lips. "I should go prepare the medicine," the priestess suddenly announced. "Inuyasha, come help me." 

"What? But I thought you already-" 

"Now, Inuyasha," Kagome said, grabbing him by the wrist and pulling him out the bedroom. "We'll be back in a little bit," she added before sliding the door shut. 

Lucidity sank onto the edge of the bed, grateful for Kagome's consideration, but at a complete loss. She touched the bandages that wrapped around Sesshomaru's stomach and felt her own twisted with fear and regret and a helplessness that was almost unbearable. There was nothing she could do but sit here and hope for the best, that a bit of research would make a difference, that the strength of a daiyoukai was enough to resist the effects of such a powerful force. If this was somehow overcome, she would be beyond relieved, happy even. Whatever happened after, if they couldn't reconcile, if he left, she was fine with that, so long as he lived. If she lost him, truly lost him.... 

Heart pounding in her throat, she moved closer and gathered his hand in both of hers. Her gaze never left his face as she brought his knuckles to her lips, a thumb moving over his claws, before she leaned down to brush a lock of hair from his forehead and touch his cheek. "Sesshomaru," she whispered, but there was no response. He lay there, the same as before, save for a fever that seemed to be worsening. When she turned his face towards hers, his lashes fluttered and his brow furrowed, but nothing more. A lump rose in her throat and her eyes burned and she quickly lowered her head to his chest, unable to endure the sight and yet unable to leave his side. Listening to the beat of his heart, quickened though it was, was a comfort, letting her know that he was still alive. But the limp hand in hers was not so reassuring and she squeezed her eyes shut.

"Sesshomaru, you stubborn asshole," she said, voice soft and quivering. "You won't stay with me for the sake of your pride, but you will give your life for me. You rotten, fucking bastard." In spite of her struggles, tears managed to escape her, running over her nose and cheek to trickle onto his chest. "I hate you.... I hate you so fucking much." And that was all she could manage before her throat became too constricted and she broke down into silent, trembling sobs. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not one, but two good cries. But can anyone blame her? I felt a bit choked up myself at the end.
> 
> Also, are there any Supernatural fans out there? Please tell me if you got the reference! XD I couldn't resist for some reason.


	37. Chapter 37

As promised, Kagome returned before long with Inuyasha in tow, the latter of whom appeared to be grumpier than usual with a scowl on his face and carrying two buckets of water in either hand. The source of his annoyance soon made itself known when Jaken followed them in, arms folded tight and a lump on his head. Kagome mentioned something about a little spat on who should bring the water before she went to work getting her herbs ready; apparently she still needed "more time" and also boiling water. No one said anything about Lucidity sitting on the bed, not having moved from where she was resting on Sesshomaru, when they came in. The group definitely paused in the doorway when Lucidity pushed herself up and peered over at them, but nothing more came of it, not even when she had to dry her eyes...again. 

A fire had been built inside the grate of the den and was steadily filling the room with warmth. While Kagome used it to heat up the water she needed, Lucidity studied the writings that lined the shelves, trying to sort through what she had and had not read. Without care or thought, she tossed aside scrolls and pushed tomes aside with no consideration to how delicate or old the paper was. If she'd read it, it was now useless. If she couldn't read it, same result. She honestly didn't believe any of these recordings would be of help. Yet, as Miroku had said, they should still look. Some effort wouldn't hurt. No effort definitely would. A sigh broke from her as she flung another scroll onto the floor and went the next one. 

"I can't imagine spending hours in this stuffy room with my nose buried in these things," said Inuyasha, having stepped away from where he was leaning against a wall and crouched down to pick up the discarded bit of parchment. When he unfurled it, his nose wrinkled at once. "Gees, this is boring. She's just talking about a water system that was built in the village. How can you enjoy this crap?" 

"Some people are fascinated with history," Kagome said from where she was kneeling in front of the fireplace. "And this palace would be a goldmine to them." 

"Keh, what a waste," replied Inuyasha. "What's the point in wondering what happened centuries ago when there's stuff to worry about now?" 

Lucidity threw a scroll at his head and he blinked at her as it bounced harmlessly off. "Centuries ago might hold the answers to questions we have now," she said as she moved onto a tome and flipped it open. Great. Gaelic. She shoved it away. "How well can you read, Inuyasha?" 

"Better than you, I'm sure, but I'm ain't doing your research for you," he was quick to say.

"Fine, then," Lucidity said. "At least stop trying to tell me that it's a waste when this is all I can do right now." 

"Hmph!" was the only response he gave, and then tossed the scroll he'd been examining onto the shelf and walked over to Kagome as she climbed to her feet with a steaming cup in her hands.

"Can you help me with this?" she asked him. "I'll need you to hold Sesshomaru while I get him to drink it." 

"If you say so," Inuyasha muttered and followed her into the bedroom where Jaken was keeping vigil over his master.

The next scroll, Lucidity tore into pieces and tossed into the fire. This really was pointless. She should let Miroku and the others do the damn homework, while she would go see Kaidame for answers. It shouldn't take more than a few days to reach Mt. Fukuro, probably less, considering the mode of travel she had available to her now. Not to mention she wouldn't need to stop to rest. Or perhaps she could shorten the trip to hours by using the water passage. She needed to ask Rusuban and started to head out to do just that when a cacophony of noise resonated from the bedroom. Shouting and swearing, something breaking, and a heavy thump suggesting that something else had fallen, all reached Lucidity's ears before she reached the doorway, peered inside, and promptly felt a stone fall into the pit of her stomach.

Kagome was on the floor, the shattered cup beside her, and clutching an arm to her chest. There was a smear on the front of her robes, a dark stain of blood. Inuyasha knelt beside her, helping her stand, the entire time yelling at a figure who was sitting upright among the furs, a hand to his head, eyes open, albeit unfocused. 

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Sesshomaru?!" Inuyasha was shouting. "Why attack her? She was helping you, jackass. Learn some fucking control!" 

"It's just a scrape, Inuyasha; I'll be okay," Kagome said. "That fever is pretty bad; he probably didn't know what was going on." 

"Don't make excuses for him!" Inuyasha snapped. "He has better sense than this. Come on, let's get this taken care of. Someone else can deal with his ungrateful ass." 

Lucidity moved out of the way as the pair came towards her. Her eyes darted over to Kagome and she noticed a long cut down her forearm, shallow, but would probably scar; she was fortunate it hadn't been worse. Inuyasha caught her eye as he walked by, expression etched with anger, and she gave him a brief nod that he barely returned. She peered back at the bed when she heard it creak and saw Sesshomaru attempting to rise, a hand on the nearest post to steady himself. She stepped closer, hesitating, but Jaken dashed forward before she could say or do anything further. 

"My lord!" he cried. "I'm so relieved to see you awake. You've been unconscious for so long. I admit I've been worried, but you're obviously strong enough to fight off the evil that has-not that I ever doubted you capable and-AH!" 

Jaken's ramblings were abruptly cut short when Sesshomaru attempted to take a step and promptly collapsed onto his hands and knees, nearly falling on top of the imp, who scrambled out of the way. Lucidity hurried over to the daiyoukai, but stopped when he lifted his head to meet her gaze, his own narrowed, distrusting, but she knew that he recognized her. 

"What have you done to me?" he asked, his voice low, perhaps even lethargic. "I can feel...." 

"The infection had to be slowed," she told him, while Jaken shifted in the background behind her, making small noises of distress. "They said it could make you weak, but it had to be done." 

"That was not your decision to make. Imbeciles!"

Lucidity didn't reply, but watched as he started to push himself up and managed to get at least one foot under himself before trying to stand once more, and failing a second time. Vaguely, she recalled how she had done the same, months ago, at the edge of a cliff, and how she, too, kept falling. Yet, unlike Sesshomaru, who had stood back and waited, she crouched down in front of him and touched his bare shoulder. 

"Let me," she whispered.

With his head down, body heaving as he struggled to regain his breath, he grabbed her wrist and attempted to pry her hand from him, only to slacken his grip when he found he was unable. "Get off me, woman," came the rough order. 

She brought a hand to his other shoulder and lowered herself onto one knee, shifting closer until her face was near his. "Let me," she repeated. "Please, Sesshomaru." 

She heard a grunt, and then, without warning, his aura burst over her, rushing along her skin, as he seized both her arms in a bruising grip, felt his claws rake over her clothes. A shock rushed through her when red eyes met hers and she glimpsed the long canines as his lips drew back in a silent growl. The whole display startled her, but she wasn't frightened, not even when his power burned hot enough to physically manifest and radiate over his body.

A sudden movement out of the corner of her eye caught her attention and she was distracted for the briefest moment, just in time to witness Jaken running for the exit. The imp stopped long enough to glance over his shoulder, discover that she had seen him, and give a nervous smile before bolting with a call of "I will let you handle this!" Yet before she could curse him for being such a coward, the hands on her arms decided to tighten and she was yanked forward. A gasp slipped from her when she realized that she and the daiyoukai were face-to-face with hardly a breath of space between them.

"You did this to me," Sesshomaru growled, the power churning through him. She could see the sweat glistening on his forehead, over his neck and chest, and swallowed. "My weakness is because of you."

"W-what?" She couldn't keep herself from stammering, she was so taken aback by the accusation. "What are you talking about? I didn't...I didn't ask you to jump in front of that thing for me. I didn't ask the others to-"

"You've reduced me to ruins, woman!" he cut in and she could see the heat in his eyes that had to be the fever. "You cause me to doubt. You make me question myself. You make me _weak_!" The last word ended on a snarl and he suddenly shoved her down. She was on her back and he was above her, power pulsating, scarlet eyes burning. With a hand on either side of her head, he lowered himself on top of her and she felt the brush of his lips against her ear. "You make me want what I should not," he murmured, his breath hot against her skin, and she recoiled at the ache that seized her. "You've destroyed me."

"Sesshomaru, stop, STOP!" she shouted. O! She was definitely frightened now, but not of him, not of what he might do to her. "You need to get a hold of yourself! You're sick, you're delirious. Please! Let me up and let me help you."

A hand pushed itself into her hair. She felt his fingers scrape over her scalp, and then tighten, yanking her head back to the point of pain and exposing the long line of her throat. A cry nearly escaped her, but she remembered that they were not alone in the palace. Inuyasha, with his keen ears, might hear or a passing servant might run for help. So, instead, she struggled in silence, keeping her lips pursed together, even as his mouth descended on her throat and a hand slid over her inner thigh, easing her legs apart. The mere touch had her desire throbbing like a maddened beast, just as it had done the first night on the Isle. Only this time, she couldn't let it happen. She couldn't give in. 

"No!" came her sharp gasp. "You need to stop. You can't-" 

Teeth sank into her neck and the cry that managed to break from her was choked and strangled as she tried desperately to stay quiet. There was no blood, but gods did it hurt! And in all the wrong ways that threatened to shatter her. She reached up, placing her hands on his chest to push him away, only to stiffen at the low growl in her ear. "You would refuse me?" he rumbled. "I can taste your heat like blood on the air. You claim you do not want this?" 

"No, no!" she said, shaking her head, pulsing racing. "Your fever, Sesshomaru, you-" 

"Tell me what you want," he ordered and the weight of his body pressed down on her, the hand slipping from her hair. "What do you want of me, Lucidity?"

Swallowing, she clenched her teeth together and stared up at the expanse of the ceiling. It was subtle, but she could hear it, the weariness in his voice. Was he wanting to know...how to fix what had gone wrong between them? He sounded so.... Dare she say it? Defeated? She never could have imagined that it was possible for one so stubborn, one whose arrogance and power were absolute, his certainty in himself unwavering, to become, well, like this. Had she truly destroyed him as he claimed? This was never what she wanted. This was...the fever, the infection. He was ill and she couldn't allow anything to happen. She couldn't let herself interpret this behavior as anything but a brain drenched in a high temperature that was taking its toll.

"Answer me, Lucidity," the daiyoukai murmured into her ear, but she turned her head away. 

She couldn't let herself want. 

With enough force to knock him into the side of the bed, she shoved Sesshomaru off of her. She heard him grunt and the bed slid a couple inches or so as she rose to her feet. His energy was dwindling, fading as though it were nothing but fog on a mirror, even as he eased himself up onto his arms, hair pooling around his head. "You've been infected," she told him. "And you need to stop. You will only make it worse if you don't. You're on borrowed time, Sesshomaru, and I'll be damned if you make any efforts to save you fruitless. All I want is for you is to get your shit together and lay back down." 

She didn't know what he thought of her demands or if he even understood what she was saying. The sight of his shoulders sagging didn't surprise her. He'd been using his power to strengthen a damaged body, essentially running on fumes that would eventually be depleted or, worse yet, sap the very life from his bones until he was on the brink of death. And when the tension fled his body and he collapsed, she closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath before she went over to lift him back onto the bed.

* * *

Sleep would be wonderful. Amazing. An absolute fucking blessing. Just a breather was all she needed. A respite from the madness that threatened to drag her down into an endless void. An entire night at his bedside, spent in silence, alone with her thoughts. An entire night of listening to those labored breaths for air, of mopping the sweat from his body, of forcing water down his throat. An entire night to contemplate everything that had happened in the last day alone, and then daring to contemplate everything that had led up to this point. Being here, the tools of the Mother, given no choice in their destinies, no choice in what life had in store for them, how they came to this moment, locked together in an existence that seemed to make no sense. This was her reality now, a reality of rising power, of blackness, of the impending loss of the only thing that made even the remotest bit of sense, the only thing that she found calming in the eye of the storm. And yet, it was not hers to have and she doubted it ever had been.

With a resounding crash, the shelf she had been searching suddenly snapped under the pressure of her grip. Lucidity wasn't even aware that she had become distracted by her thoughts. Now her mind returned to itself as a cascade of old books and parchment spilled onto the floor around her feet. Scowling, she dropped the pieces of the broken shelf and kicked the mess out of her way with a grumble of disgust before striding out of the library and down the hall. 

This was ridiculous! She shouldn't be forced to stay on the Isle, regardless of what Kagome had said. Inuyasha was just too stubborn to treat Sesshomaru himself. Lucidity actually needed to speak with that damn Seer. And yet, according to Kagome, she was the only one who was able to tend to Sesshomaru, because it was too dangerous for anyone else if he awoke in a fevered rage and did something worse than simply rake his claws over someone's arm. Again, she recalled what had transpired after everyone had left the chambers and knew how utterly and completely furious Sesshomaru would be should anyone who wasn't her witness such a display. And even then, he would be far from happy. But what else could she do? 

"Rusuban!" Lucidity shouted down a hall filled with servants who all turned their heads in her direction. "Where is Rusuban? Tell her I want to see her!" The servants glanced at one another, faces mirrors of surprise and uncertainty. Lucidity sneered at the ineptitude and stalked to another area of the palace. "Rusuban! Where the hell are you?!" 

"Here, here! I'm here, my Lady!" called a voice, followed by hurried footsteps. Lucidity turned to see the old woman rushing up to her with a small sea of servants parting for their head of household, who came to a stop in front of her, panting softly. "How may I-" 

"The library is useless," Lucidity interrupted, flinging a hand in the general direction she had come from. "Where is it? The rest of the Guardian's journals? She had to have kept more records than what we have here." 

"Oh, yes, she did," Rusuban said, more than a little anxious. 

"Well, where are they?" Lucidity demanded. 

Rusuban wrung her hands. "I don't...I don't know exactly. The former Guardian kept many things, many artifacts, but not on the Isle. She had a place, hidden from mortals and-" 

"And you have no idea where it is," Lucidity finished for her and the old woman dropped her gaze. 

"I'm afraid so," she replied. "What I know is that she appointed a race of winged youkai to watch over her collection. She gave them a home in return for their services, above the lands they wished to escape. And before she relinquished her power and created the Four Sisters, she charged the youkai with the task for protecting it all until the arrival of her successor." 

Lucidity's heart skipped as her thoughts whirled with dawning comprehension and she took a step closer. "Winged youkai? Do you mean owls?" 

Rusuban nodded. "Yes, my Lady. They-" 

"I know where," Lucidity murmured, more to herself than the caretaker. She started to turn away. "I have to...."  Her words trailed into silence as she paused, frowning. Mt. Fukuro must have the answer. She had to speak with Kaidame, had to find out what he knew, if he knew anything that would be of use. But Kagome needed her help with Sesshomaru. And someone...someone had to keep watch over him at night. That was one thing Inuyasha couldn't do, she realized, her shoulders sagging. Dammit to hell! 

"What is it?" asked Rusuban suddenly. "What's wrong, my Lady?" 

"I need...I need someone to run an errand for me. I need it to be quick and it would be faster if I went myself, but I...I don't know if I should leave.... I...." Swallowing, Lucidity bit down on her thumbnail, brow furrowed, narrowed eyes fixed on a spot on the floor. 

"If it is a quick return that you need, then give the person a piece of your hair or a drop of your blood." 

The words brought her head up and she turned around, frowning at Rusuban. "Come again?" 

The old woman gave her a smile. "If you wish for someone to find a safe route directly to the Isle, he will need a piece of you to place in the water when he requests passage from the Hahaoya no Shikyu." 

Lucidity blinked, staring for a heartbeat or two, and it wasn't until she noticed that her chest was starting to burn that she realized she was holding her breath. Letting out a heavy exhale, she rushed forward and took Rusuban's hand in both of hers. "Thank you, thank you!" she said. "Thank you, Rusuban!" And then she hurried off before the old woman could so much as form a reply. Halfway down the hall, her form dissolved and she flew through the palace in search of the one person she knew who had not only the means necessary to make the journey, but motivation to boot.

She found him outside, gazing absently at the weeping Hahaoya no Shikyu. She, too, cast a glance at the tree. The sap had not stopped during the night and while it was a curious matter, it was not one that even Rusuban concerned herself with, while the servants merely spoke among themselves and speculated that perhaps it was the Isle attempting to restore itself to its proper glory about being in stasis for so long. Whatever the reason, Lucidity did not care to learn anymore secrets of the Isle. 

"Jaken," she said, materializing in front of the imp so abruptly that he let out a shout of surprise and toppled backwards. She didn't even wait for him to get his bearings as she stooped to pull him upright onto his feet. "I need you do something for me, something to help Sesshomaru." 

The imp didn't have to be told twice. A brief explanation, instructions, a strand of blonde hair, and only a moment of doubt when he wondered if Kaidame would bargain with him. Yet when presented with a request from the Guardian of the East, the Seer would be an utter fool to ignore it. And if he did, for some unfathomable reason, refuse, there was nothing that could stop her from taking what she needed by force, claiming what was rightfully hers. If she had no choice but to be the Guardian, to accept the responsibilities, then she was damn well entitled to the benefits, especially now. 

"So, you got the toad to do your dirty work, huh?" 

The voice drifted down from the veranda moments before the hanyou himself came to stand beside her. She let out a soft grunt as the two of them watched Jaken disappearing through the clouds on the back of the two-headed dragon. "It's not dirty work," she said. "I do that myself. What do you want, anyway?"

"Kagome needs your help with Sesshomaru."

"Remind me again why she doesn't ask you."

"Because she knows that I don't want to, but that you do."

Lucidity glanced over at Inuyasha, whose golden gaze, so much like his brother's, met hers, and she quickly turned away to head up the steps of the veranda. "Any change?" she asked when Inuyasha followed her.

"No," he said. "Miroku and Sango should be back soon; they went to explore the area, or at least that is what they'd have us believe. But Miroku said he would start combing through all those dusty old writings for some sort of answers as soon as they get back."

"Wonderful," she muttered. "I can hardly wait."

* * *

Waiting, however, was the only thing any of them could do. To Lucidity, it was absurd that a hanyou, a daemon slayer, a powerful priestess and monk, and the daughter of a deity-whether at full potential or not-were forced to play the waiting game all because a collection of mass tar had completely incapacitated a daiyoukai. Yet that was the truth and there was no escaping it. Sesshomaru had not once regained consciousness, not even for an instant. And Lucidity knew this to be factual because she hardly ever left the chambers. She and Kagome tended to him, changing his bandages-and even his clothes-as needed, keeping an eye on his fluctuating temperature, feeding him water, medicine, and wondering aloud what the youkai lord's diet actually consisted of, since he had said more than once that he did not eat human food.

"Soylent Green?" Lucidity suggested at one point, only for Kagome to become so disgusted by the thought that she became sick, compliments of her progressing pregnancy. And Lucidity never mentioned it again.

That was how the first day passed, and the second, and the third. Lucidity did not venture out of the palace as the others did. Other than the bedroom and den, the only other place she frequented was the library. She still had no hope that the journals would hold anything of worth, but it was either staring at words on craggy, brittle paper or at an unconscious daiyoukai, whose recent drop in fever was little more than a temporary relief. Once in a while she came across Miroku, buried in piles of scrolls, muttering vaguely about Sango off practicing. But he, too, had come across no answers when asked and Lucidity could only scrounge for more journals, more tomes, feeling more useless by the hour and wondering how much longer until Jaken reached Mt. Fukuro.

It wasn't until the fourth day that she remembered the damn thing. It didn't surprise her that hadn't until now, having used it only once. So, for the first time in days, she left the halls of the palace and ventured into the courtyard, yet went no further than the spot behind the curtain of vines, where Sagashite seemed to be waiting for her, so serene with the unnatural gleam upon its waters. And yet when she touched the surface, nothing of great worth was revealed. Her worries that something might have happened to Jaken were abated when she saw that he was alive and well, traveling upon Ah-Un. But the countryside that she glimpsed beyond him was unfamiliar to her, which did not bode well. She could only hope that she didn't recognize the landscape because Jaken was on a different route.

An unexpected streak of light had Lucidity whipping her head around to see Inuyasha standing in the midst of the vines and calling over his shoulder, "I found her! She's back here," before he stepped into the alcove. "What are you doing? Why did you leave Sesshomaru alone?" he asked as Kagome, Sango, and Miroku all streamed in behind him. And, without giving her a chance to answer, the group gathered around the pool of water. There were gasps and exclamations as they each leaned over, staring at the sight of the imp and dragon.

"How come you never told us about this?" Sango asked.

"I...forgot, honestly," Lucidity said.

"Does this let you see anything you want? Anywhere?" asked Kagome.

"To a point. It's limited to territory. So, if you're on the other side of the planet, I'd have no way to find you. But yeah, other than that, it's possible."

"Wish we had this when we were hunting Naraku," muttered Inuyasha, arms folded as he stared down at Jaken, who had just sneezed and was wiping his nose.

"It would have made hunting him easier," agreed Miroku. "But perhaps our enemies now can be located. Lucidity, do you think-?"

But Lucidity was already touching the surface again, which shimmered so brightly that they had to cover their eyes until it receded. And yet when they were able to look, the pool was dark, nothing but black water for a moment before its glow slowly returned, like a connection reestablishing itself. "Wherever the blackness is," she said, "I can't find it."

"Hmm...what about the vipers?" asked Inuyasha.

Lucidity shook her head. "I need to know what the person or place looks like beforehand."

"Keh! Then this thing is useless, like most of the crap around here. Seriously, this is supposed to be the home of a goddess's kid? And all we got is a house full of creepy servants and a tree that won't stop leaking everywhere? Some legendary Isle this is!"

A heavy silence followed Inuyasha's outburst. The others glanced at one another and their silence had Lucidity wondering if they actually agreed with the hanyou. And when none of them met her eye when she glanced over, she was confident in her conclusion. As a fresh wave of hopelessness washed over her, Lucidity reached out and dipped her finger into the water once more. "I'm sorry you all feel that way," she murmured, and then turned and swept out of the alcove, just as an image filled Sagashite. She heard Sango let out a gasp.

"O! Miroku! The children! They're-they're...."

"Yes, yes, I see. They're still safe. Everyone is."

"Oh my god, I'm so relieved!" Kagome said. "I was starting to worry, being gone for so long. I was about to ask Lucidity if we could take a bit of her hair like Jaken did, so we could go and check, but then come back right away."

"We still could, you know?" Inuyasha suggested. "Sesshomaru's not going anywhere."

"But what if something happens while we're gone?"

"What else can we do? We've just been waiting around for Jaken. A few days-"

Nothing else was heard as Lucidity stepped through the wooden door that led back into the palace. Showing them the village had been an impulsive decision. She wasn't entirely certain why she had done it, other than to possibly make a point that not everything here was useless. But she had not imagined it would prompt them to leave. Would they really abandon her here? She understood that they had other obligations, people who depended on them, children who were waiting for the safe return of mommy and daddy. Yet with Sesshomaru on his deathbed, would they actually....? 

Lucidity came to a sudden stop and leaned against a wall, gazing wide eyed at the floor, shocked by her own thoughts. Deathbed. Sesshomaru. Those words in the same sentence filled her with such stark terror that her knees knocked together and she slid down a couple inches. Just like her father. Gods be damned! This was just like her father! She nearly collapsed then and there, part of her wishing desperately that she could just...pass out, not think, not feel. Yet she remained upright, locking her knees in place, and forced herself to straighten. Taking a deep breath, she gathered her thoughts together and pushed down the panic, the despair. And while it seemed she was alone in this after all, that wasn't anything new. With one foot in front of the other, she made her way through the palace and back to the chambers, ignoring the servants who greeted her along the way, Rusuban included, and rolled the door of the bedroom shut behind her.

And the weight of the situation grew all the heavier when she laid eyes on the daiyoukai and saw the rapid movement of his chest, heard the rattling breath that filled his lungs. With buckets of cool water sitting beside the bed, she soaked a rag and wrung out the excess before laying it across Sesshomaru's forehead in the hopes of reducing the fever that had returned. She loathed every second of seeing him like this, but could do nothing but go through the motions of elevating his upper body with mounds of pillows and a rolled up blanket, to ease any possible tension in his chest; she could only assume, since he wasn't exactly in any position to tell her his symptoms and he seemed to breathe easier for it. Yet when a rare, but hardly reassuring note of pain broke from him, she stopped and, frowning, drew the covers off of him before opening his haori, with the intention of checking the wounds.

Lucidity froze, eyes widening, as she stared in horror at what lay beneath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gotta love a delirious Sesshomaru saying things he probably shouldn't say.


	38. Chapter 38

As one, the group gazed down at the prone figure on the bed, surrounded by soft furs and suspended above the floor in a rare comfort of luxury. And yet the luxury came at the price of his body giving out by slow degrees, dying inch by inch. From beneath the bandages, marring his skin like grotesque tattoos, black veins were spider-webbing their way outward over his stomach, cutting a path along his body, towards his heart.

"Can't we try the barrier again, Miroku?" Kagome whispered.

The monk, who was holding a hand over Sesshomaru's chest, took a moment to answer. And when he merely shook his head and withdrew his hand, there was no need for him to voice the answer aloud, yet he did so regardless. "It's too strong and has spread too far. I'm afraid we have reached the point where we can only hope for Jaken's swift return and Sesshomaru's strength to resist."

"How long do you think he has?" Inuyasha asked.

"It's difficult to say," replied Miroku, closing his eyes and bringing a hand up in prayer. "A matter of days, no more than a week, perhaps."

"Inuyasha," said Sango in a soft and for some reason tentative voice, "if...if this infection does to Sesshomaru what it did to the other youkai, you...you know what must be done?"

"No shit, I'm not stupid, Sango!" snapped the hanyou. "I'll do it myself if I have to."

"This is horrible," Kagome murmured. "There must be something more we can do. I hate just sitting around and waiting for.... You haven't found anything in the library, Miroku?" 

"Sadly no. Informative though some of the passages are, they have yielded nothing of use," said the monk. "And if Jaken is unsuccessful, all that remains is finding the blackness so that we might defeat it and hope the effects are reversed."

"Kagome's right," Inuyasha suddenly proclaimed. "Screw waiting around. We should head out now. Staying here and doing nothing isn't going to fix anything."

"You have a point," said Miroku. "Delaying will only make things worse."

"Yes, but...." Kagome began, but fell silent with a glance towards the far side of the room.

Lucidity was there, leaning against the wall, arms behind her back, and observing the others gathered around the bed. She'd been standing here for some time after bringing the news of Sesshomaru's failing health to them, watching their examination and listening to the discussion without interrupting. And now they seemed to have remembered her, but she found herself oddly indifferent to their varying expressions of worry. She didn't like the idea of them leaving to hunt down the blackness, but there was little she could do if they had made up their minds. And if it meant saving Sesshomaru.... "Go," she said. "I can take care of him. I'm the only one who can risk it, anyway."

"We don't want to leave you here on your own," Kagome said. "If something happens while we're gone-"

"Something will happen one way or another," Lucidity replied. "You're being here or elsewhere won't change the outcome. But finding a solution will make a difference." Inuyasha and Miroku appeared to be resolute, if not anxious, but Kagome and Sango were obviously hesitant. With a sigh, Lucidity stepped away from the wall and crossed the room to the table, where she picked up the dagger that had been discarded weeks ago. With the blade in hand, she made short work of a long, lock of her hair, tied off the end into a knot, and tossed it at the group. Inuyasha caught it, staring at her with something akin to amazement. "Don't let any of that go to waste," Lucidity told them. "Now take whatever else you need from here and get out."

Inuyasha stowed the hair away in his haori. "We're coming back before anything happens, got it? So don't go doing anything rash."

Lucidity let out a soft snort and shook her head. "Whatever. Kagome, Sango, if you want, ask the girls to bring you some of my clothes. It's more protective than armor and softer than cotton."

Kagome's eyes widened slightly. "Wow! Really?"

"Thank you," said Sango, striding forward and dragging Lucidity in a hug that was no longer bone crushing. "Don't forget that we're here for you. You're our friend before a Guardian to us. Just remember that."

Something in Lucidity softened, enough that she sagged into the embrace and wrapped her arms around Sango, ever mindful of her strength. "I'll be sure to keep an eye on you," she whispered. "But please be safe. I don't want anything to happen to any of you."

* * *

Alone on the Isle. Was that the fate of a Guardian? Lucidity had to wonder. The Guardian of the South was said to be isolated and withdrawn. But was it merely from her sisters or did she isolate herself from the world, unable to cope with the passing of time, of watching the constant change, of watching loved ones die? Did each Guardians build herself one of these desolate homes, cut off from others, emerging only when necessary? What a cruel fate. And yet, being immortal, what else could be expected? Would Kagome, Sango, Miroku, and their families become a simple footnote in her life? And though their lives were greatly extended compared to those of humans, would the same happen with Inuyasha and even Sesshomaru? Would they fade into nothing but vague smells and quirks and sounds lost to time? Just as had happened with her father?

Lucidity wasn't really aware of herself kneeling on the ground or of the plants in her hands that she was digging up by the roots. So completely preoccupied in her thoughts, her surroundings had became a vague background to her, even as her body went through the motions of gathering herbs. Would this fade, too? Would she forget the torment of being alone, of waiting for answers, of believing that there was no hope? She would like to forget these days. Yet she did not want to forget her friends, nor Sesshomaru.

The memory of him was bright in her mind. There was no change in his condition since the others had left yesterday. And while there was no improvement, it was a small blessing that nothing had worsened either. Yet when she had changed his bandages that morning, she'd realized the medicine was almost gone, which was the reason for her being out here. Not outside the palace, the walls of which she had not set foot from in days, but out on the mainland, away from the Isle, considering it had no vegetation that was of use. And though she was ever doubtful that the medicine was making a damn bit of difference, it gave her some peace of mind. It also gave her something to do, something other than research that led nowhere. 

The sharp trill of a bird brought Lucidity back to her surroundings. She glanced up and caught a glimpse of wings disappearing into the branches above. While vaguely wondering when animals would return to the Isle, she dropped her gaze to the basket she was kneeling next to. It was pitifully bare, no more than a few plants that were hardly adequate to begin with. She wasn't surprised, though, with it being so late in the season. Finding a mere handful was what she expected more or less. Tossing the roots into the basket, she dusted off her knees and started to stand. 

"Greetings, Lady Guardian." 

Hogosha was in her hand before she was on her feet, its blade pointed towards the ground. She spun around, skin crawling with the aura that had quite literally sneaked up on her, as she found herself facing three male youkai a short distance away, two of whom were lounging so casually against the trees that they oozed indifference to any threat the scythe or the one who wielded might pose. The third stood apart from the others, closer to her, and was tucking a crystal necklace inside the neck of his armor. That alone was enough to tell her who these intruders were and why they had caught her so unawares; she did not need to see their scales or slits for pupils to recognize their breed. And the sight had her hackles raised, so to speak.

"You are not welcome here," she said, heart thudding in her ears. "And how do you know who I am?" 

"Our people are not so ignorant of the history these lands hold," answered the viper who had taken down their barrier. "Our ancestors were devout to your predecessor and the stories of her are well known to us, including her telling of a successor who would one day come during a time of great danger. This area was once part of our territory and we have always remembered that it possesses the gateway to the Isle. We knew your return was imminent after the plague began to sweep our country and have come seeking an audience with you." 

Lucidity blinked. The...Viper Clan...had known? Was this why the real reason they had invaded Sesshomaru's territory? Rusuban had never mentioned the Clan, nor had the journals. Was it possible? She didn't like the thought, not in the least, and felt her lip curl. "I have already had an audience with two of your kind," she said. "I did not care for it or them and I certainly have no interest in speaking with you. I suggest you leave, now." 

There was a brief flicker of surprise on the viper's face and she saw the other two behind him exchange a quick glance. And then the viper stepped forward and, most unexpectedly, dropped to a knee and bowed his head. "My Lady, I cannot speak for the ones you met or how they offended you, but I beg of you to hear me out. Not for myself, but for my people." 

Taken aback by the display, she stared for a long moment at the youkai before her, prostrating himself, whereas during her last encounter with his kind she had been treated as little more than a snack. And dammit to hell, she was intrigued now. Forgetting the basket on the ground, she stepped forward. She didn't fail to notice the other vipers had moved away from the trees and were at attention. And yet before any could move, she spun Hogosha up and brought the flat of the blade against the chin of the one before her. Hands flew towards the hilts of swords, save for the one kneeling so perfectly still. 

"Careful," she warned. "I can take his head and be gone from here before your swords are even free of their scabbards." The fury on their faces left no room to doubt how they felt about the threat, but the arms falling to their sides also let her know that they were willing to cooperate for the sake of the youkai who spoke for them. She peered down at him and eased his head up by applying only a mild bit of pressure to his chin. "Are you the leader of the Viper Clan?" 

"There is no one leader," he replied. "The Clan consists of numerous tribes, each with a leader of its own. We meet as a council to make decisions for the Clan, but it is the Council of Elders we answer to."

"We?" Lucidity repeated, still keeping the scythe to his throat, while her attention remained on all three.

"Yes, 'we.' I am the leader of my tribe," he explained. "And I was elected by my people to seek you out, to ask for your help. We are in dire need of the Guardian's protection."  

"And yet your people have made war by crossing into a territory that is no longer yours and hasn't been for centuries," she said. "If you were in such dire need, why not send a messenger to Sesshomaru for an alliance against a common enemy?" 

"The desperation of the people and the will of the Elders were enough to drive most across the boundaries. Waiting for diplomacy when we were being killed by the hundreds was not an option many were willing to take." 

She pressed the blade harder against the viper's throat and saw a thin line of blood glide down his skin. "And the tricks used against Sesshomaru and his mother?" 

He didn't so much as flinch, but kept an unwavering and rather intense gaze on her. "An evil necessity. We could not risk the sons and widow of Inu no Taisho slaughtering what remained of our people. Everything we have done is for the sake of our survival. And now we are trapped, with the plague out our backs and the Inu at our fronts. You are the only one we can turn to, my Lady." 

Lucidity studied the youkai on the ground, pleading with her in so regal a fashion. This was a leader, one who was clearly held in high regard and well respected by his people, sent to beg for their lives, to beg her for aid. Or was he expendable? Did the Council expect him to fail, to be killed by the new Guardian? With an ever increasing curiosity, she forced his head higher still, baring the entire length of his throat. He didn't move, didn't speak, didn't look away. He waited in silent repose for her answer. The bearing he possessed, even while down on a knee, was striking. And with his dark hair drawn back in a high ponytail, accentuating his already sharp features, she found him irritatingly handsome. 

Scowling slightly, she finally lowered the scythe. "What is your name?" 

The viper smiled and rose to his feet. "I am Masami," he said with a deep bow. "And these are Migi and Hidari, my most trusted warriors," he added, indicating each in turn. 

Her gaze darted to the other youkai, who had stepped forward and bowed even more deeply than their leader. Migi and Hidari were of a more heavily muscled build, their hair shorter, but of the same dark color. They both sported finely made armor, while Masami was dressed in richly dyed fabrics and robes that had a decidedly foreign cast. "You are not like the vipers who guarded the vault," she eventually remarked.

"Hebi and Mamushi?!" Masami exclaimed. "Those are the idiots you...." He stopped, looking uneasy, and cleared his throat. "Forgive me, my Lady, I did not realize you had met such a poor example of our people. Hebi and Mamushi were one of several pairs assigned to guard the vault. They were not from my tribe, but I knew of them; it came as no surprise when they failed in their duty. Would it please my Lady to know that they were killed some time ago?"

"I'm aware of what happened," Lucidity replied coolly. "Why assign ones so incompetent to protect the vault?" 

"Ah, an easy misunderstanding," said Masami with a little smile. "The vault was believed to already be well protected by magic, nigh impenetrable. The duty of the guards was merely to watch and report any sightings of Sesshomaru. A simple task, you would think. Yet we did not expect Sesshomaru to ever be successful in liberating his mother. That was an embarrassing failure on our part, underestimating our enemy. And because Hebi and Mamushi did not manage to remain hidden and were executed by Sesshomaru as a result, the Clan did not learn of the breech until their corpses were rotted almost beyond recognition. It put us at a great disadvantage; we still do not know how he broke the seals." 

They didn't know about her, she realized. They didn't know who she really was. A matter she was grateful for when she heard Masami's next words. 

"The Elders have become obsessed with finding the human who helped him." 

Lucidity frowned, her grip tightening on Hogosha. "Why? What would they do with the human?" 

"Learn from him, I suppose," answered Masami. "They know he lives, in spite of the necessary sacrifice to be free of the vault, because of Sesshomaru's fabled sword. It...really should never have been possible, what he did." 

"Why not?" 

"The vault was designed with magics known to very few, in this land and others. No one outside of our Clan should have been able to penetrate it. And yet Sesshomaru found a human who was able and willing, for only the human whose blood was used to open the door could have passed through the barrier, along with those of the Inu bloodline. The Elders have the ability to bring the barrier down in other ways, as their intention was to seal the entire Inu line inside; their blood is the key, after all. Once we were successful in that endeavor-" 

"There would have been no chance to free Sesshomaru or his kin," Lucidity murmured, dazed at the sudden understanding. She was horrified by the thought of Sesshomaru being trapped inside the vault, along with his mother and Inuyasha. At the same time, she was amazed at the cleverness of the plan. If it had not gone awry, if it had not been for her, the little variable the Clan could never have predicted, Sesshomaru could have very well been defeated. Kagome would have lost her husband, perhaps her life if the Clan learned she was pregnant with the next generation of Inu. And, if not, Lucidity could not imagine what existence would have been like for her and her child. The Mother...the Mother had done so much more than simply ensure that the paths of Lucidity and Sesshomaru had crossed, done so much for more than just Herself.

"Shocked" didn't adequately describe the overwhelming sensation that had Lucidity stepping away from the vipers and covering her mouth to smother the soft curses that escaped her. Wind kicked up around her as she turned her head down, swallowing heavily, and soon closed her eyes. All the while, her awareness of the vipers never wavered. The touch of their auras as they remained where they stood was ever at the forefront of her mind. And even still, she could not help but dwell on the Mother, on the pieces of Her puzzle that continued to fall into the place. Yet, even now, the picture was incomplete and the final product remained unclear. 

"My Lady?" came Masami's voice. "Are you all right?" 

"I...will not help you," she whispered. 

"What?" She heard him take a step forward. "My Lady, please-" 

Her eyes snapped open as Hogosha blazed in her grasp. "If your Elders insist on these tricks and deceptions, if they insist on sealing Sesshomaru and his family away in urns, then I will not help you! Your people are no concern of mine, understand? I am not the former Guardian. I never have been, I never will be. They have sent you on a fool's errand." 

Migi and Hidari moved forward to stand on either side of Masami, who was staring, arms at his sides, and face slack with astonishment. "So...so it's true," he said softly. "You are in love with the eldest son of Inu no Taisho." 

Lucidity didn't remember charging forward. She didn't remember her body breaking down into the familiar molecules that had the vipers immediately on guard, unable to defend themselves when she barreled over all three with a blast of power. Hidari was knocked into a tree, while the other two were sent sprawling across the ground as she went after them, but it was Masami she seized. A solid hand twisted itself into the material of his robes and she was spiriting him into the air before his most trusted warriors could comprehend what was happening. When they did, their voices followed her and Masami as they rose higher, far above the trees, demanding that their leader be returned. Yet rather than spare him, she used him, to answer the question she'd been wondering idly about for days, but had been unwilling to make the attempt with anyone else.

It did not take much. A mere thought and her body disappeared in a soft whirlwind of air, as did his. Migi and Hidari were beside themselves, but their calls grew fainter and fainter until nothing could be heard as Lucidity spirited Masami away with her. An interesting experience it was. She was still herself and he was still himself, separate and yet together. She could feel him in a way that would not have been possible had their forms been physical. He was filled with wonder and also terror. She knew this to be true as surely as she could read it in his eyes when their forms materialized, miles and miles above the earth where the cold air was so thin that Masami was taking in great lungfuls of it to compensate for the depleted oxygen.

"My Lady," he gasped. "Please, I did not mean to offend. I-"

The dull end of a semi-sealed Hogosha being pressed against his stomach brought his words to an abrupt end. "Do not think me so petty," she said, her furious gaze locked to his. "You are presumptuous, yes, but I would know the reason. Explain to me why you would assume to know anything about my relationship with Sesshomaru."

"H-Hidari and Migi," said Masami upon a deep inhale. "I sent them to follow Sesshomaru when he emerged from the Isle. His appearance was a surprise, but...we knew he was involved with the Guardian somehow, if he was given passage. We only wanted to find you, my Lady, I swear."

Lucidity stared. "That was weeks ago. They've been following him for that long." 

Masami nodded as well as he could, dangling from her hand as he was. "Y-yes. They...they returned only yesterday and r-reported to me what they had witnessed, with you and...and the others, with...with Sesshomaru. That was h-how we knew you were the-the Guardian." 

The constant stammering, the halts in his speech, were becoming irritating. While she contemplated over the implications of what he was saying, she brought them to a lower elevation and watched as some of the color returned to the viper's cheeks. His breathing grew easier and, with a wrench in her gut, she remembered a certain daiyoukai who continued to struggle in her absence; she needed to get back and soon. 

"We know that Sesshomaru is injured," Masami suddenly said, as if he could read the thoughts on her face. "We know that you brought him to the Isle to keep him safe while he recovers. But we also know that he isn't recovering, that there is no cure. Many of our people have succumbed to the same ailment he suffers from. It is...not a pleasant end, my Lady. And the stronger the youkai, the longer it lasts. I do not say this to cause you further anguish. I would have you understand our plight. Families. Children. I beg you to please help us, and I will see to any terms you set forth myself. If you wish for us to strike an alliance with the Inu, then that is what I will do." 

Lucidity was beginning to understand the reason his people had selected him to seek her out. His patience and determination seemed to be endless. He must have been stationed here for months. The blackness had been ravaging his lands long before it came here and he had been able to do nothing but wait for her. And now that he finally had his chance to fulfill his duty, he did so with resolute focus on what needed to be done. She held him at her mercy. Any second, any wrong move on his part, and she would either split him in half or release him and allow gravity to do the rest of the work for her. Yet he was clever. The persuasion of his argument had Lucidity gritting her teeth at the far too familiar ache that uncoiled inside her whenever she allowed herself to dwell on the very real possibility of Sesshomaru's.... 

"I can't," she said. "I can't simply allow your people to cross over into a territory that isn't mine. And I can't let any of you onto the Isle." 

A smile suddenly slid across Masami's lips, slow and strangely warm for one so coldblooded. "I understand your loyalty, my Lady," he replied. "I would expect no less from you. But, please answer me this: if the Clan was to come here, to seek refuge at the boundary of your Isle, would you send us away? Would you kill us? These are men, women, and children, people who want nothing more than to live." 

Lucidity pushed Hogosha hard enough into his stomach that his face contorted with pain. "Your 'people' have been killing humans and feeding on their blood. Your kind is hardly what I would consider innocent." 

"Not all," Masami was quick to say. "There is no need for it. Only a few tribes still practice the old customs." 

She snorted. "So you claim." 

"If it is your decree that humans be left in peace, then I shall ensure that the Clan abides by it. Please, Lady Guardian. I swear on my honor that I will do whatever you command, if it means keeping my people safe." 

Glaring at the viper in her grasp, Lucidity could see nothing but his earnest supplication, the raw desperation in his face, the hint of fear behind his eyes, and sneered. "You put me at odds with Sesshomaru and his brother," she bit out. "Understand that if you bring your people to these shores, I will do nothing but ask the Inu for a truce and have them speak with you and the other leaders. If Sesshomaru or Inuyasha do not agree, I won't stand in the middle of your squabbles. You will be on your own, got it?" 

For a heartbeat, Masami hesitated, but soon nodded. "Yes, my Lady." 

"Until then," she said, "no more killing. No more tricks. No more urns or vaults. No more barriers. You and your people will remain out in the open as a show of trust. If I discover otherwise, that even just one viper goes back on this deal, I will drive every last one of you out of here myself! Understood? Do not make me regret this." 

Again, he nodded and murmured his agreement. And Lucidity, feeling as if she had committed some act of treason, sheathed Hogosha and started to descend. Briefly, they were without form, until the last dozen or so feet above the ground, when she unceremoniously dropped Masami in front of his men. He groaned as Migi and Hidari stood there for a moment, staring in surprise at his abrupt reappearance, before quickly crouching down to help their leader to his feet. Lucidity remained airborne not far above them, gazing down at the vipers and doubting the wisdom-or lack thereof-in her decision.

"If you come across Inuyasha and his group, tell them we have spoken," she said. "So long as you show that you mean them no harm, they will be willing to listen, especially the priestess, Kagome."

"Kagome?" Masami repeated, and when Lucidity nodded, he added, "I will remember the name. Thank you, my Lady." And then he bowed, bending deep at the waist, and his men did the same.

Making a sharp noise of irritation in the back of her throat, Lucidity left without another word, stopping only when she spotted the basket of herbs that she'd forgotten about. She snatched up the meager supply, and then road the winds back to the Isle, wondering what sort of chaos would ensue because of her decisions this day. The fact that the vipers knew how badly Sesshomaru was injured should have been cause enough to kill them then and there. And yet she couldn't bring herself to outright slaughter people who had come to her, prostrating themselves for her help. This was something that needed to be discussed with Inuyasha as soon as he came back. She doubted his decision would have been any different. But if the vipers were intending to make a move to take the territory when ruler of the western lands was out of commission, she and the hanyou would need to put a stop to it. According to Masami, the lives of his people were in her hands. Would she be able to take so many if it was necessary? Would she kill an entire clan of people to protect the ones she cared about? A moral dilemma if ever there was one, even for a person like her, whose morality was warped compared to some standards.

She was drawn from her thoughts as a fog rolled in that marked the boundary of the Isle. And once it cleared, nothing but ocean stretched out around her, decorated with the familiar formation of land and trees, with a single structure gazing back at her that was a solemn speck of white amongst the dirt. And yet it wasn't until her feet touched the ground of the courtyard that she noticed a movement that was out of place. Until this moment, the figure had been so still, but now it lumbered forward from the forest line, two heads turned in her direction.

Ah-Un!

But where was Jaken?!

With concerns of the vipers completely driven from her mind, her head whipped around as she turned this way and that, searching for the tiny, green creature. A low, miserable moan caught her attention and she quickly noticed the imp half-hidden in the shadows on the veranda, where the foliage thickened near Sagashite's niche. She was there in an instant, kneeling down, and he lifted his head, looking as if each tiny movement cost him more effort than he could spare. He was so wilted with exhaustion that she was amazed he didn't collapsed on the spot. Sitting with his legs folded and the Staff laying next to him, she saw that he had a bundle on his lap, which he held out to her without a word.

She set the basket aside in favor of taking the bundle, but kept her attention on the imp. "Jaken...what is it?" she murmured.

"Medicine," he replied, peering down at his lap. "Kaidame said you would need it."

Of course he did, she thought, but put the bundle with the other herbs, her focus solely on the imp. "No, that's not.... What's wrong, Jaken? What happened?"

Jaken didn't answer. Not right away. And not with words. He stared and stared and, for good measure, stared some more at the ground, before his face began to crumble. His mouth pulled down at the corners, started to tremble, and then his eyes squeezed shut, tears pouring down his cheeks, before he covered his face with his sleeves. But it did nothing to muffle the noise of his sobs or hide how his body was wracked with each one. And though Lucidity felt herself reacting to the only answer his display could mean, she swallowed heavily and, taking a breath to calm herself, placed a tentative hand on the imp's shoulder. When he didn't respond, she wrapped one arm, then two around him and the next moment he was weeping into her chest.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm so sorry, Jaken."

"There's no cure," he choked out between sobs. "N-nothing from this-this land can cure him. That is what...that is what...what Kaidame....." And he broke into a fresh wave of tears, shaking against her.

Lucidity could do nothing but hold the imp, offer little beyond the empty solace of open arms, as there were no words she could say that would be of comfort. She felt so cold, so helpless, and nearly joined Jaken in his despair, nearly allowed herself to succumb to her own tears. Yet she was so tired...tired of weeping, of being useless, tired of being toyed with, of her life, of Sesshomaru's, being played out for them.

Gently, she took hold of Jaken by the shoulders and urged him back until those large eyes were peering up at her, silent hiccups jolting him every few moments. "When was the last time you slept?" she asked, but he merely shook his head in answer. "Go rest. You can lay down in the den, if you want. I will be there as soon as I can." Jaken didn't even argue, but dragged himself to his feet, teetered a moment, before picking up his Staff and the bundle. She stood and followed him to the door, pulling it open for him. There was a mumbled note of gratitude and little else. She watched in silence as the small figure wandered into the palace, his expression empty, his movements automatic, and felt a pit of emotions welling up inside her. And, at the forefront, as cleansing as ice water against hot skin, a refreshing wave of fury rolled through her.

Hogosha, before it was even unsealed properly, was sent hurtling through the air, thrown like a javelin. As it sailed towards its mark, the weapon lengthened and grew, the blade emerging, and the scythe sank into the wood of the Hahaoya no Shikyu with Lucidity arriving not two seconds later. She wrapped her fingers around its staff and shoved the blade home, right up to the hilt. The great tree remained the silent sentinel, the sap still pouring from it in steady rivulets that soaked the ground and stained the bottom of her feet as she stood before it. With a wordless cry, she released the power in Hogosha. It tore through the tree, up to the very last leaf and down into the smallest root. The gentle hum of aura that was forever dancing around the Hahaoya no Shikyu rippled, and then exploded over her, a soundless scream that had her spine bowing against an onslaught of pain. Her ears were ringing. The ground beneath her feet was starting to shake. The branches swayed and creaked as though in angry thrashes and still she kept the flow of energy open, continued to beat against this unworldly creation that was the heart of her domain, where her power was the strongest.

"[I am not your tool!]" Lucidity shouted, her own language sounding so strange to her ears. "[I am not yours to use! And neither is Sesshomaru! He has done what you wanted and you will not let him die! Do you hear me? After everything you have done, after all you have manipulated to get what you need from us, you will not simply let him die, not without me tearing apart everything you have sought to protect. Do you understand?! If you take him, I will let this world fall into chaos. To hell with your balance, Mother!]" And she wrenched Hogosha out of the tree, felt the sap splatter across her face, only to plunge the blade back in. A second scream of energy bore down on her and she gritted her teeth. "[Damn you! He does not deserve this! He did it to save me, you ungrateful bitch! Now tell me how to save _him_! TELL ME!]"

Sap gushed from the fresh wound of the tree, flowing over the scythe, and she stared, not fully comprehending what she was seeing. The sap was winding its way down Hogosha and wrapping around her hand. There was energy in the thick mass that curled along her skin, but it didn't burn or hurt. It just...traveled, going higher and higher up her arm, disappearing beneath the sleeve of her tunic. She stepped back, leaving Hogosha where it was, and felt the sap moving up her shoulder, over her chest, then throat. Up and up it climbed until she felt it around her mouth, gliding between her lips, and she screwed her eyes shut, heart racing. She tried to spit it out, tried not to stumble in alarm or lose her footing, but she did. On the ground, she let out a sharp breath and the sap ran over her tongue and down her throat. She choked, not wanting to inhale, but having no desire to swallow either. And yet she did. And the power.... The raw power of the tree's essence was like nothing she had ever felt before. Pure in form, utter and absolute, like the breath of life. She could feel it spreading throughout her body, filling her, strengthening, and her eyes sprang open as she gasped in unexpected understanding. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The snakes have come crawling back. What fun! I wonder what complications Masami and his crew will cause.


	39. Chapter 39

The world was a confusing thing, a heavy thing. It was a place of sordid details that blended together and painted a portrait that was crude and distorted. The nonsensical blur of images and echo of sounds did little more than disorientate, and were completely baffling with no explanation as to the reason why nothing had solid form. There was no purpose to the surrounding chaos. Voices drifted, rising and falling like tides, so close and deafening one moment, then so distant and soft the next. There were hands touching, water flowing, and movement that was of an other's making. No control. There was absolutely no control. And that was dangerous. It was vital to have control, pivotal to survival, and yet the reason eluded as everything else did. Reason did not exist in this world of dreams, dreams that were so vague and somehow so vivid all at once. The smells, the people, they were well known. Yet why did they exist in this void of noise and bright colors that took no physical form?

And why was he here? If he could just remember, if he could just reach out and touch, then it would stop. Reality would become as it should be. The confusion would stop. The noise and the turmoil would cease and the world would be still again, would be solid, would be his. He needed to move, needed to escape. But what was he trying to escape from? Why couldn't he remember? There was something important, something he had to do. But what? And how? If he was trapped, how could he conquer? Yet he couldn't even recall what it was he was supposed to defeat. He needed to remember.... Something...so very...very important. 

The comprehension that was just within his grasp fell away. It was not the first time, nor was it the last. He tried to get his thoughts in order during these times, tried to understand what was happening, but it was like trapping the wind with bare hands. An impossible task, a useless effort. And the effort was wasted again and again. Each moment was accompanied by some sort of sound or smell that penetrated a distant part of his mind, allowed him to cling, to put forth another attempt at latching on, to pull himself out of the void, only for the connection to weaken, eventually severing, and he became lost again, utterly unaware of what happened until the next round of clarity struck him. 

But these moments of clarity were becoming more frequent. There was something...new. A flavor. A scent. Fleeting at first, then gone, until it came again and again. A sweetness on his tongue, being poured down his throat, and spreading inside. And every time he tasted this nectar, he noticed a detail that had escaped him before. An arm sliding beneath him. Being lifted, or having something pressed to his mouth. And a warmth, an...aroma of another that...shouldn't be here. And yet it was...pervading his mind, reminding him of something very..... 

And then he felt it. 

His own body.

The sensation was so strange, so alien, that he could not understand, at first, that the weight he felt was his own arms or that the movements at his sides were his own hands. Yet as his awareness increased, he was able to rake his claws over the material that was beneath him. The sound of shredding fabric reached his ears and he turned his head as his eyes finally slid open. He found himself staring up at what he knew to be a canopy, but it was unfamiliar to him. Everything about his surroundings was unfamiliar, right down to the attire he wore. The scents, however, he could never mistake and a shrewd idea was forming in his mind about where he was located, given the most prominent scent that lingered around him. 

Sesshomaru sat up and, for the first time, noticed a faint pain in his midriff that gave him pause. The memories, though, were coming back to him, which explained his condition, but did not explain where he was or why he was dressed in fabrics he did not recognize. And even if it had been her who had changed his clothes, the knowledge did not sit well with him, nor did the bandages that he discovered when he opened the haori to inspect his wounds. With a threatening scowl, he dragged his claws over the bandages and tossed the tattered remains to the floor. The injury beneath had healed over, with no sign of what had incapacitated him however long ago. Not much time could have passed; new skin was still growing, causing the discomfort, but little else. He could not be certain. His recollections were sporadic and he had difficulty recalling much beyond his last argument with Lucidity, when she had laid the blame at his feet. There were flashes, brief images, most of which he couldn't determine the authenticity of, or did not wish to. 

Pushing those unwanted thoughts from his mind, he pulled the set of furred blankets from his person and rose from the raised bedding. The moment he was on his feet, he knew he was not at full strength. He was able to stand without struggle, but the poison had done its work; it would be several more days before he was completely recovered. Vexing though it was, he still intended to hunt down and destroy the enemy that had wounded him to such a degree. Next time, he would not be defeated. Next time, he would not awake to Lucidity kneeling over him, breathing air back into his body, no less with the hanyou and priestess bearing witness to his moment of weakness. That memory was enough to turn his already foul mood even fouler as his gaze roamed across the room, taking in what little it had to offer, from the mirror and room divider to the table decorated with several weapons, including Tenseiga and Bakusaiga. It was just as he went to retrieve the swords that the door rolled open and a figure stepped in. There was a breath of stillness while Sesshomaru peered over at the intruder, and then the silence was shattered by a high-pitched cry.

Jaken sprinted forward, half-blinded with tears, and stumbled into a heap at his feet. Then, to Sesshomaru's surprise, Jaken seized the material of the hakama he wore and wept into the clothing. "My lord, my lord!" the imp wailed. "You're awake! I can't believe it! I was so worried. No one knew if you would ever wake again. O, Sesshomaru-sama! I'm so happy to see you alive and well!" 

In the daiyoukai's experience, his servant had never crossed such a boundary before. Jaken always maintained a respectful distance as social order dictated, as did his master's preference of not being touched. Never had he violated that order until now. Bewildered, but impatient with the display, Sesshomaru flung the imp off him with a lazy kick, sending him rolling across the floor with a startled yelp. "Enough of your foolishness, Jaken." 

"Y-yes, of course, my lord. Forgive me for forgetting myself," the imp murmured upon getting to his feet and giving the proper bow that was expected of him. "I'm just so.... It has not been easy, my lord, seeing you-" 

"My clothes, Jaken, where are they?" Sesshomaru interrupted.

"Oh! Yes, right here!" Jaken said as he hurried behind the divider and quickly emerged with the red and white silk. "But...I'm not sure where Lucidity put your foot coverings. I can ask her...er.... Actually, I don't know where she is." 

"This is her dwelling?" 

Jaken nodded as he held out the clothing. "She brought us to the Isle, so that there was no chance of an attack with you so.... I mean, given your condition, you were very vulnerable. Ah! I didn't mean-that is to say, you were unconscious for-" He broke off, flinching and ducking his head, when Sesshomaru took the haori and hakama from him. But when nothing further happened, he shifted towards the doorway. "I will wait outside until you are ready, my lord, and then show you through the palace if you wish."

There was no reply from the daiyoukai, who merely turned away. Retreating footsteps echoed behind him as he went through the motions of changing back into his proper attire. Once the mokomoko was gathered over his shoulder, he collected the swords from the table and secured them through the sash at his waist, before he picked up the pouch by its string, studying the small bundle of leather with a frown. The Isle, he thought, stowing the pouch away in its usual spot. After he had decided he would never return, he had been brought back absent of choice. There was no doubt in his mind that Lucidity had been the one who tended to him while he recovered, the one who had dressed his wounds and applied unnecessary remedies, the one whose image filled his mind the most when he attempted to recall the vague flashes of confusion that had plagued him while unconscious. It infuriated him, her interference. Whether the toxin had greater potency than he realized or not, he did not need, or want, an isolated sanctuary. He did not need someone standing at his bedside as if he was some feeble human. She knew this, but of course chose to ignore it.

Perhaps she acted out of obligation, as it was because of her that he had been injured. He pondered this as he left the room, Jaken following in his wake and asking what his lord intended to do now. Sesshomaru ignored him, thoughts still churning through his mind, as he walked the halls, coming across those same, curious women of silver and gold. As two of these servants darted out of his path, Sesshomaru concluded that it was not entirely accurate to lay the blame on Lucidity. She'd become a liability, yes, but he was the one who had been the reckless fool this time, throwing her to safety and putting himself in danger in the process. The most irritating aspect of what he had done, actually, was his lack of hesitation. He had not considered the consequences. Or was it that he had not cared?

"Holy shit!"

Sesshomaru stopped at the unexpected outburst, causing Jaken to collide with the back of his leg, and found himself standing in front of the open entryway of a banquet room that was empty save for two people, one of whom was facing him, shock etched across his features, until a grin split his mouth. At the same time, the woman with him turned around, a pair of chopsticks at her mouth, which she dropped a second later and scrambled to her feet.

"Sesshomaru!" the priestess shouted as she stumbled out into the hall, while Inuyasha followed at a more leisurely pace. "How are you feeling? You haven't had a fever the last couple of days, but we didn't know how much longer it was going to take. Oh! I'm just so glad to see you out of bed! We've all been really worried about you." 

He blinked at the mention of a fever, but soon dismissed it; it was no concern of his any longer. "Your worry is unnecessary," he replied, sliding his arms into opposite sleeves. "You forget with whom you speak."

"Don't be like that," Kagome said, hands clasped together in front of her as she leaned forward. "There are people here who really...really care about you. They've had no rest since you were injured. It's been a nightmare, honestly."

"I told you not to expect much, Kagome," said Inuyasha. "Everyone might have been scrambling to find him a cure, but he doesn't thank people, not even his own woman, no matter if she did save him from a trip to the Underworld." 

Once again, Sesshomaru was surprised at this bit of information that caught him off guard. His gaze shifted between the hanyou and priestess. Their shock at his recovery had been unusual, but if what the hanyou claimed was to be believed, then it would explain their behavior, as well as Jaken's. And yet....

"You exaggerate," he said.

Inuyasha gave a hollow laugh and folded his arms. "Yeah, sure. Keep telling yourself that." 

"Sesshomaru," Kagome said, moving closer, and went so far as to put a hand on his arm. "It's true, what Inuyasha says. You've been out for over two weeks. It was a close call this time, very close. You've been really sick. The infection was spreading and your wounds weren't healing properly. You woke up once, at the beginning, but you barely recognized anyone; you even lashed out at me by mistake." And she pulled her sleeve back to present him with a bare forearm, marred by a healing cut down its center. "This rising power that we're dealing with is extremely dangerous." 

"So you better fucking believe it when we say that you were on your deathbed," Inuyasha added. "And that woman of yours wouldn't leave you alone. Do you know she doesn't sleep? As soon as she found a cure, she's hardly budged from that room. It's been days and Kagome convinced her just a few hours ago to get some air. Talk about timing." 

The daiyoukai glanced between the priestess and his loudmouthed brother. He was...uncertain about what to do with the information garnered from them. Unsettling though it was to learn the full extent of his injuries and to realize the true strength of the enemy responsible, it explained the actions of those around him, the reason why particular measures had been taken, whether necessary or not. And he also came to realize that the fragmented images he'd cast aside upon waking had not been dreams. Scattered and vague though the pieces were, they were triggered by the sight of Kagome's injury. Triggered by the scent of blood...and the heat of a female.

He remembered. 

What he'd done. What he'd said. He remembered everything, including her response. The memory brought a flush of anger...and of embarrassment at his own lack of inhibition. Was there no end to his humiliation with that woman? Teeth clenched, he turned and strode away, the mokomoko swaying in his wake and Jaken running after him, crying out for his master to wait.

"Uh oh," came Kagome's carrying whisper. "We didn't tell him about...you know?"

"Eh, it's better if he hears it from Lucidity," was Inuyasha's response.

"Yeah, but what if he takes off without talking to her?"

"...crap. Oi! Sesshomaru!" Inuyasha called out. "There are some people camped out on the mainland. They came to Lucidity for help, so don't kill any of them."

Sesshomaru did not stop, let alone reply. Why Inuyasha would deem it necessary to inform him of such a matter, he didn't know, nor did he care. He continued through the halls until he found the single wooden door. Behind him, he could hear Jaken panting with the effort of keeping pace with his long, quick strides. His claws cut into the wood as he pulled the door open and stepped outside, pausing only briefly at the scent of other humans. Behind the vines, where he knew the pool of water to be, he could hear them, the monk and daemon slayer. Their voices rising and falling in conversation was an unwelcome greeting and he was soon walking away, down the steps into the courtyard, where the echo of power from the Hahaoya no Shikyu caressed his skin. He glanced over at the tree as he passed, then halted mid-stride and looked again.

His previous visit here had been short and unpleasant, but the details of that day were finely ingrained upon his memory. Yet he did not recall these scars upon the trunk of the tree. "Oh!" said Jaken at his heel. "That was your cure, my lord. The sap of the Hahaoya no Shikyu, to be more precise. The tree was leaking for days, but Lucidity was the one who figured it out. I'm not sure what happened exactly, but I do know that she nearly destroyed it in a fit of rage. That servant, Rusuban, was furious. Apparently if the Hahaoya no Shikyu is killed, the entire Isle and its protection will die."

Sesshomaru studied the two long, disfiguring marks upon the otherwise flawless surface of the ancient tree. "And Lucidity was aware of this?"

"I believe so," answered Jaken. "She'd sent me to Kaidame to find possible answers and I'd just returned with nothing to show for the effort. She attacked it not long after. I think it may have hurt her, too; this thing seems to have a mind of its own."

Intrigued, he moved onto the roots and reached out to touch the marks. His fingers felt along the dip in bark, tracing the scars and sifting through the energy of this sentient being, which held more power and awareness than the simple.... Suddenly, he stopped and let his arm fall back to his side, then stepped away from the tree altogether. This was...disconcerting. Being on this Isle was a sort of torment that he had never experienced before, filled with ghosts that plagued his mind, of another scarred tree he had once studied, and with her next to him no less.

The intention had been to leave. That was what should be done, what needed to be done, and he began to put more distance between himself and the palace. His time here was better spent elsewhere, on more important matters. But once again, his footsteps came to a stop. Important, he thought. What was more important? By all logical arguments, ridding the land of the rising power was the most pressing concern. And that could not be done if he remained on the Isle. There was simply one minor detail that needed to be addressed first.

"Stay here, Jaken," Sesshomaru announced without warning.

"What? But...where are you going?"

Always Jaken insisted on asking these inane, pointless questions and rarely was he given an answer. This time was no different, as Sesshomaru gathered his energy and let it carry him upward. The imp called out to him one more time. "Inuyasha mentioned her scent is difficult to track sometimes. It's better to follow the trail of the winds when that happens."

Taken aback, the daiyoukai glanced down at his servant, who froze, wary of the potential wrath he had brought upon himself. It was not the forwardness of Jaken's manner that was bothersome, though, but rather the oddity of it. Jaken was...encouraging his interaction with Lucidity. With his mouth pressing into a thin line, Sesshomaru rose above the forest to begin his search, only to discover quickly that Jaken's advice had been sound. Lucidity's scent was faint beyond the palace, with little that could be tracked that wasn't several days old. It was the subtle current of energies that he followed, instead. It took some time, with her power retracted and aura muted, but eventually he was able to find her.

At the top of the mountain that overlooked the Isle, where the wind howled and buffeted at him, he saw her near a ledge that was covered in greenery, some feet below the very peak, resting against the wall of a depression in the rock. The spot appeared to be artificial, as though it had been carved out of the mountain for the purpose of escaping from land-bound creatures below. Sesshomaru descended near the edge and peered down at the still form. She sat with her legs tucked beneath her and arms folded loosely across her lap, head downcast and hair obscuring most of her from view. He considered what Inuyasha had mentioned about her lack of sleep and wondered if he was mistaken. Yet a second before he stepped closer, her head jerked up and he suddenly realized the most ridiculous thing when the light of the dying sun behind him fell on her face: her hair and skin were near white in color, with only faint traces of yellow in the strands and a subtle hue in her cheeks and lips.

Solid blue eyes were fixed on him, wide and open, with no curtain of control to hide her astonishment or the rising trepidation. She was breathing heavily, mouth firmly shut, as she stared at him, apparently having little faith in her sight. He said nothing, merely gazed back at her, until she closed her eyes unexpectedly and exhaled through parted lips, shoulders sagging and head bowing. And in the same instant, the wind that had been flinging around his hair and fur ceased without warning. The utter silence that followed rang in his ears and his jaw worked upon understanding what it meant.

"The wind is yours to command," he said, and she nodded. He should have expected as much, recalling who the leader of the Four Sisters had been.

"How are you feeling?" came the soft question as she leaned her head back against the wall, peering up through her lashes.

For a moment, he did not intend to answer, a moment that was almost non-existent as soon as he considered her. "Improved," he replied and she smiled, a slow and tired expression that nonetheless served to remind him of what needed to be done. He extracted the drawstring pouch from his haori and tossed it down next to her. "Do not overthink the matter; I am merely returning it."

She looked at him a bit longer, and then picked up the pouch to open it. There was no reaction beyond a flicker of surprise when she withdrew the chain and pendant. It dangled from her fingers before she gathered it into her hand and shifted her attention back to him. "You're leaving," she stated, her manner perfectly stoic.

"That is correct," Sesshomaru said and turned away.

There was nothing from her. No words, no shift of movement, no heavy sigh, no anger. There was no attempt to stop him, simply a quiet acceptance, or so he believed until something caught his attention out of the corner of his eye and he turned his head. A glimpse of silver sailed through the air and over the ledge, where it disappeared from view into the forest below. His gaze lingered longer than was necessary before he turned back to Lucidity, who had returned to the same position.

"I would not have bothered if I had known you would treat your father's gift so callously," he said. "What is the meaning of this?"

"So long as you live, so be it," was the muttered reply. "But I do not want the reminder."

Her scent.

He knew her scent better than any other female, every shift of it, every nuance. He knew the taste of her fury, her fear, her excitement and arousal. He knew when she wished to weep, but never showed her tears. And he knew her now, as the Guardian, the drastic change that she'd undergone and how, beneath it all, she still smelled of the warm fires of home. But this scent he caught from her now was wholly unfamiliar, different from all the others. Strange and palpable, he could not place it. It was like the weight of water, a pressure that came from all sides and yet wasn't solid to the touch, could not be held or controlled.

He approached her. In spite of everything, of what should have been better judgment, he came to stand before her. She lifted her head. The scent grew stronger and he noticed the weariness behind her eyes. It went beyond mere exhaustion of the body. A silent suffering, and he suddenly understood what the scent was, though he'd never known it from her before, not to such an extent, at least, to have brought about a change in her aroma. And he was the cause. That never had sat well with him, being the one responsible for her injuries, her pain. And with an unbidden wave of comprehension, he realized this was what his mother had meant. He would bring Lucidity nothing but suffering. Not simply because of his youkai nature, but because of his own nature.

A hand fisted at his side when her gaze slid from his, to rest elsewhere, vacant with thought, or perhaps no thought at all. This outcome was not what he wanted. He would not have her defeated like this. He would have her...as she should be. Not the woman who bowed her apologies or sought his forgiveness, but the woman whose conviction matched his, whose intellect rivaled his own, whose strength challenged him long before she was able to physically overpower him. What was more important? What was he willing to sacrifice? Questions that had been difficult, only because he already knew the answers. The moment he caught the scent of her grief, it was indisputable.

"Lucidity," he called.

She didn't respond.

He stepped closer and she shifted, her awareness returning as her brow furrowed. "What you would have of me," he said, "I am...agreeable."

Her eyes widened, and then rose to meet his, expression fractured with a shock that was, in some way, fearful. And a tension filled him that was unprecedented, just as it had been the first time he'd felt it, that day when she'd been dying in his arms. Yet it did not stop him from moving forward and extending his hand. And even when she pulled away, still staring at him as though searching for some hint of deception, he did not lower his arm. Her trust in him was broken. This much he could understand. And he also understood that if it was not regained, there was more than one way he could lose her.

Only she could do this to him. It was only she, Lucidity, whom he would ever allow to do this to him, he thought, as he spoke one simple word: "Please."

She straightened, hands braced on the ground on either side of herself, as if she intended to stand on her own. And yet she remained where she was, the emotions open and raw on her face, the astonishment too great to hide. As was her hesitation when her shoulders began to relax and she lifted an arm, pausing for just a moment, before reaching out. He felt her hand come to rest in his palm and his fingers closed over hers, holding for a breath, before he drew her to her feet. Not a word passed between them as she tilted her head back to look up at him. Infuriating though it was, he felt his pulse quicken in response and the meaning of it was not lost on him.

Whether she was the one to move first or him, he did not know and it didn't matter, because she was suddenly against him, face buried in his chest. Her fingers scraped along the fabric of his haori as his arm wrapped tightly around her waist, his other hand weaving into the thick strands of her hair. A fist struck him near the shoulder, the force of it pitiful, utterly lacking in strength, and he could hear her speaking, saying words he did not understand until-

"Damn you, Sesshomaru," she hissed as she drew back to look up at him once more, face filled with an anguished fury. "Why do you do this to me? Why do I let you do this to me?!"

"We are of the same opinion," he murmured, and then lifted her to him. He heard her gasp, felt her stiffen, but she soon grew languid in his arms as his mouth closed over hers. Her lips parted for him, welcoming the embrace, and he knew that he would refuse to relinquish her after this. He would not leave. He would not have her from his side, never again, because she was not the perfect prey, nor she was the ultimate opponent.

She was his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Has anyone had a high fever before? I remember having one once and waking up in the middle of the night and I couldn't figure out what was going on or what I was doing, couldn't pick dream from reality. Very trippy stuff, man. 
> 
> Also.... 
> 
> FINALLY, Sesshomaru! Jeez!


	40. Chapter 40

A minor, curious detail, it was, that perplexed him nonetheless in the wake of other matters. With the weight of her across his lap, she rested in the curve of one arm, her head against the mokomoko that had been slid from his shoulder, while his other arm was free to reach out. His claws raked a gentle path through the locks that tumbled over her shoulder and his eyes followed the strands as they slipped through his fingers. The sun was gone from the sky and the waning half moon was rising, but he could still see the stark difference of color. "What happened?" he asked, speaking for the first time since he had lowered the two of them to the ground, when a faint ray of light still remained on the horizon.

Lucidity, who had been watching the sky, glanced down at her hair, before pushing it off her shoulder. "The East changes with the seasons," she answered. "Apparently she is the only Guardian who does."

"Interesting," he remarked as he brought her hair forward to inspect once more, only for her to pull the locks from his grasp. He glanced up and noted the subtle pull to the corner of her mouth. "You do not care for it?"

"I look like a porcelain doll," she said with a sneer in her voice. "I'll be glad when spring is here; I can only hope my hair doesn't turn green."

"Of that, we agree upon, but this...." And again, he gathered up the near white locks, wrapping the strands around his hand, and brought them to his lips. He peered over his knuckles at Lucidity, who seemed to regard him with a hint of wariness. The sight...amused him. "I do not find displeasing."

A light blush filled her otherwise pale cheeks and she rolled her eyes before peering back at the sky. "Maybe you need to lie back down. With talk like that, your fever must be returning."

"Does it upset you that I consider your appearance satisfying to look upon?" he asked, giving a gentle tug to her hair that had her reaching up to grab onto the locks in an effort to free herself from his grasp.

"Hmph! Only satisfying?" she grumbled, even as the color in her face deepened and she pulled with a bit more determination against his grip.

"Is that not what you wish to hear?" he asked and his hand, still wrapped in hair, slid along her cheek to tilt her face up. He felt her grow tense, eyes widening a fraction, as he leaned in. "Would you rather that I speak plainly?"

She shifted, her unease blatant, as it always was when she found his manner too forward. "Sesshomaru, it...it isn't necessary. I don't need to hear anything like that."

A breath of amusement escaped him and his lips brushed against her ear when he spoke. "As you wish, Lucidity." 

She turned her head away and sat up. It did not surprise him, nor did the racing heart he could hear inside her chest. He let the hair fall from his grasp finally, in favor of placing his arm around her stomach, to ensure that she did not attempt to stand. He had no interest in allowing her to leave for some time. And it seemed, for a short while, that was what she intended, until his other arm curled around her shoulders and his hand came to rest on her upper arm. As if she was a puppet whose strings had been severed, the tension eased from her body and she slid back against him, her head coming to rest upon his shoulder.

"I'm not complaining," she said somewhere near his collar bone. "But what's going on with you? You're acting stranger than normal."

His amusement quickly faded and he closed his eyes, leaning back against the moss covered wall of rock behind him. "Need you ask?"

"I am, aren't I? I mean...I guess what I'm asking is: why did you change your mind? Not too long ago you told me you were leaving and now.... Well, I'm assuming you don't intend to anymore, right?"

"Correct," he replied.

"So...what changed?" she pressed, nudging him slightly.

His brow drew down and he swallowed a rising growl. "Woman, you are infuriating at times," he said. "Yet I would have it no other way." He felt her move and knew she had lifted her head from his shoulder, knew she was watching him, and it was a moment before he continued. "I would have you as you are. The thought of you being subservient, as you once mentioned, does not appeal to me. Was that not your condition upon accepting my return?"

"Yes, but...that still doesn't explain why-"

"You hold more significance than a matter of pride," he said in a rough voice, opening his eyes and fixing her with a heated glare that had her growing still, her lips parting in surprise at the bald admission. He scowled; infuriating, indeed. "You wanted an explanation, woman. Do not be so shocked by the response. I could smell your pain; it lingers still. And I loathe knowing that it is my doing. If sacrificing that measure of pride you wanted would bring relief, then I am willing. Does that sufficiently answer your question, Lucidity?"

She closed her mouth, swallowing, and nodded. Then, before he realized what she was doing, she'd taken his face in her hands and he felt the warm touch of her mouth against his. "Thank you," she murmured upon drawing away, "for telling me."

He snorted softly and tilted his head back, letting his eyes fall shut once more. "You will speak of this to no one," he said.

"Heh, deal," she chuckled, and he felt the weight of her sink back into the mokomoko.

A silence fell between them, one that Sesshomaru was content with as his irritation began to ebb away. He was relieved she had no further questions. It was frustrating, having to explain himself and knowing what would happen if he did not. Yet he was aware that this would be a necessity from now on, given the terms she had set forth, ones that he had agreed to. He simply wasn't accustomed to another person having expectations of him, not since he was a small child living under the rule of his parents. But that was customary, was it not, when one had a partner? What else was customary? What more would be expected? He could not be certain. He'd never had a partner before, let alone one from another country, another era. These uncertainties were vexing and he did not wish to address them so soon. There would be time later, he decided, just as he felt his hand, which was resting on Lucidity's stomach, being gathered up in her grasp.

"What are you doing?" he asked, feeling her fingers glide over his palm, the unblemished one.

"Looking," was the vague response as her touch roamed, brushing over the pads of his fingers and thumb. She took care to inspect his claws one at a time and would caress the smooth surface of each in turn before tempting fate by testing their sharpness. Her skin was durable, he noticed, whenever she would run a finger over a claw. Even when she gave a tentative press, nothing happened, and soon she moved on, easing the sleeve of his haori back to reveal his wrist. The youkai markings were what she was after now and she traced these, again and again. He would draw the line if she attempted to do the same to his face, but at the moment, her touch was a soothing lull that eased the last of his aggravation. The rhythmic caress became relaxing enough that when she stopped, he was pulled back into awareness rather unexpectedly. But she was merely moving her fingers back down to trace his claws instead and he allowed it to continue. A moment without concerns or questions, without the need to speak, to simply-

His eyes snapped open when the scent of blood reached his nose and he caught her wrist in a firm grip before bringing her hand up to inspect. A frown pulled at his lips at the red liquid that beaded heavily from the tip of her index finger and began to trickle down. His gaze slid over to her and she offered a small smile that was nonetheless sheepish with embarrassment. "Is there a reason for this foolishness?" he demanded.

"Curiosity?" she offered.

He raised a thin brow. "You wished to test your body's resistance to claws that have been known to be laced with poison?"

She bit down on her lip, looking more like an anxious child than the daughter of a deity. "Erm...."

"Idiot woman," he said, unimpressed with the lack of forethought, and lifted her hand closer. His tongue caught the trail of blood as it neared her wrist and glided upward, moving over her palm, then up her finger, where his lips closed over the wound. A potent flavor, it was, that served to remind him of the first time he had tasted her blood, when she had been beneath him, when he had succumbed to that feral need to claim her. He would not act with such idiocy now. He would not attempt to claim her like that again unless invited, even as she insisted on reacting to the inspection of her cut. She was shifting in his lap again, as though wondering if she should rise or pull away, while he drew on the wound, his tongue searching for any further hint of blood.

"Ah! S-Sesshomaru," Lucidity mumbled, apparently unable to suppress a gasp. "I think you.... I think that's good."

Still holding onto her wrist, he looked up, pleased at the sight of her pink cheeks and the sound of her bated breath. His gaze never left hers as he moved his mouth down to the inside her wrist. He could feel the rapid pulse beneath his lips, smell the heated blood beneath the thin layer of flesh, and felt her shiver at the brush of his teeth. "Do you wish me to stop?"

He watched the movement of her throat as she swallowed once more, an invitation he could not ignore, and his mouth soon descended onto her jugular. She gasped again, arching slightly, but made no attempt to free herself or push him away, not even as his tongue painted a path up her neck and over the curve of her ear. A moan broke from her when his teeth closed over her earlobe and her scent deepened when he did not release the tender bit of flesh. And though he did release her wrist, it was only to ease his hand into the sash around her waist. This time, the clothing fell away within seconds and his hand slid up her body, pushing at the seams of her robes until the material hung from her in loose folds, exposing her shoulders and upper chest, along with a thin trail of flesh down her stomach.

His gaze lingered on the skin that was laid bare and stopped above the waistline, revealing nothing below, while his teeth continued their torment of her ear, dragging soft noises from her that only served to entice him further. He lifted her higher in the curve of his arm, the mokomoko providing the necessary leverage to bring her within easy reach as his mouth moved over the side of her neck. No scars, he noted, and felt a sense of bitter approval; it meant a chance to mark her properly, should the opportunity arise. His tongue dipped into the hollow of her throat and his teeth found the outline of her collar bone, while his hand slid beneath the material of her robes. His claws left faint, pink patterns over the fair skin of her chest and moved downward until he felt the outline of a breast, along with a sudden grip upon his arm. 

"Wait, wait," she breathed and he straightened, peering down at her with a shadow of a frown. "Sesshomaru, your wounds-" 

"Have sufficiently healed for this," he said with a hint of impatience. "Do not think me so weak, woman, that I am unable to perform this simple act." 

"I...that's not what I meant," she protested. "I was only worried. You've been unconscious for weeks and now all of a sudden-" 

Her words broke off when he wrung a sharp gasp from her throat by rolling the delicate nipple of her breast between his fingers. The way she squeezed her legs together, thighs rubbing against one another, did not go unnoticed. He did it again and her response was just as alluring, with her head falling back into his furs and her spine arching, low moans slipping from parted lips. "Do you have any further objections?" he demanded. "As sensitive as you are tonight, do you insist on your foolish protests?" 

When she gritted her teeth and glared up at him, he tugged the robes apart, leaving her open and, to some extent, vulnerable. She was starting to squirm again, even as he pulled her to him and captured her mouth in a firm kiss, smothering any feeble arguments that might be on the tip of her tongue. And at the same time, he moved his hand down between her legs and pinched the lips of her sex. Her body convulsed and she cried out in surprise, the noise muffled, as she seized fistfuls of his haori. And yet when he pushed his fingers deeper, she shuddered and immediately went limp. Her moans filled his ears when he drew his mouth from hers and their breath mingled together as he held her close. "Would you deny that you want this?" he whispered, rubbing over the spot that had her trembling, her eyes falling shut. She bit down on her lip, only to give a jolt, her voice growing louder, as his fingers moved harder. His teeth grazed over her ear, his tongue tracing the familiar contours before a growl broke from him, causing her to shiver to such a degree that the skin around her nipples hardened and contracted. "Would you refuse me, Lucidity?"

She shook her head, but the gesture was feverish with desire as her arms rose above her head to grip onto the mokomoko as though it was the last tether to reality. With his own desire mounting, he eased her onto the ground, the fur falling around them, and laid himself over her with a hand still between her legs, his mouth still beside her ear. "Answer me," he said, and yet heard nothing but a string of foreign words that blended together in unfamiliar notes. His fangs caught the tender skin of her throat and he gave a rough pinch to her swollen folds once more, this time with enough force that her cry of pleasure ended on a whimper that had her writhing beneath him. "Answer me properly!" he ordered. "Would you refuse me?"

"No, no!" she finally groaned. "Gods, no, Sesshomaru! I want this, I want _you_. Gods be damned, I want you!"

And on that last, brittle cord of control, he freed himself from his hakama and entered her in one, smooth thrust. Her cry was almost too high for his sensitive hearing, but the warmth that enveloped him was a welcomed distraction. He could feel her hands on him, pulling at his haori. In a confusion of flurried movement, he was suddenly bare from the waist up and she was clinging tight to him, her own robes no longer hanging from her arms. And he was moving against her, sliding inside her, deeper it seemed with each stroke, her moans as inviting as the throbbing tightness around him. She was rising to meet him, never stopping, never tiring, a yearning to match his own. And he allowed himself to become lost in the rhythm of their bodies, her voice ever constant in the air, her scent drenching. Time drifted away from him and he could no more remember the events leading up to this moment than he could imagine what would come after. He focused solely on the one beneath him, the noises that broke from her, the warmth of her contracting around him, the way she cried his name as she bucked and shuddered, and how she dragged him down with her as he reached his own completion that tore his voice from his throat in a sound he could not be certain of.

Piece by piece, his surroundings slowly returned as the ecstasy receded and he eventually became aware of an echo of drums that reverberated through the air. It took him longer still to recognize the beat of not one heart, but two, his own and hers that were both quieting after the rush of excitement. He could hear the gentle cadence of her breathing, feel her shifting between him and the ground, as though uncomfortable with the weight of his body. Yet he had no inclination to move and a deep rumble of displeasure rose in his chest at her constant squirming, along with his teeth latching onto the junction of her neck and shoulder. She went rigid and he heard the unmistakable note of a low whine in her throat that was oddly gratifying. In this she yielded to him, his will, his dominance, and he found a certain pleasure in the knowledge that she could satisfy him in such a way, given the force of her personality at times.

Suddenly, hands were  weaving into his hair and she began to murmur, the words soft, nearly inaudible. Though it wouldn't have mattered, as he could not understand a single syllable apart from his name. Resisting the urge to bite her again, he took a moment to draw himself out of her, hearing her gasp in response, before he eased himself up, a hand on either side of her head, to peer down at the woman who had fallen silent. His hair spilled over his shoulders, creating a curtain around their faces as he studied her, this strange and foreign female who possessed secrets even she had not been aware of, and now possessed him. He knew that where she was concerned, she would always be his priority. The realization did not anger him. Rather, he silently marveled at how the presence of another could wrought such a change in his life, the details of which were currently muddled and unimportant. What lay before him was the end result and it was not an unpleasant sight. When his claws touched her cheek, she didn't flinch, merely watched him with open curiosity as he moved his hand down and tilted her head up by the chin.

"You will teach me your language," he said. "I would understand what you are saying at all times." 

She blinked, startled for only a moment, before she sighed. "But that's the point. It's no fun if you understand me. And I won't be able to use such colorful curse words anymore, either." 

"I have heard you curse often enough in my language to know that is a lie,"  he replied, thoroughly unconvinced.

A grin spread across her lips. "I am tame in your language. Your ears would bleed if you knew what I've said in mine." 

He let out a soft snort. "Uncouth female," he said. "You will teach me regardless. And tell me the words you were speaking just now." 

To his surprise, her eyes widened and she shook her head, going so far as to wrap her arms around his neck and tuck her head beneath his chin to keep her face hidden. "Why?" came the muffled reply, more of plea than question. "You've never asked me before."

"I have never cared to know before," he said. "I would hear the translation, Lucidity." And when she simply grunted in response, he pushed her down so that she lay on her back, his hand on her shoulder to hold her in place. She didn't struggle or protest, but stayed where she was, though her gaze remained downcast. "I have answered your questions because it is what you want of me," he reminded her. "Are you refusing to extend me the same courtesy?" 

She shook her head once more, brow wrinkling, and didn't look at him when she spoke. "I was just...I...all I said was that I'm...glad you're back, that I...missed you and...."

Her voice trailed off as she turned her head to the side, a frown hardening her countenance and anger flickering in her gaze. Curious, he leaned down and eased his nose into her hair, his mouth moving over the shell of her ear. "And what?" he murmured and felt the expected squirm in response, and how she strained against his grasp. "Answer me, Lucidity." 

"'I hate you for making me feel this way!'" she snapped and he pulled back to see her glaring up at him. "That's what I said. Happy now?" 

"Not particularly," he replied in a rough voice, and then sat back on his heels, pulling her onto his lap in the same motion. With his arms tight around her waist, she gripped his shoulders, nails biting into his skin, as she bared her teeth at him in a silent challenge. "So you confess hatred for me?" 

"It's not like that and you know it!" she said. "Put me down, Sesshomaru. This isn't funny." 

He could feel the swell of his desire returning as he peered up at her, at the anger that filled her cheeks, at the way her breasts heaved with each breath she took, and the burning heat of those blue eyes fixed on him. A young, strong daiyoukai he was, one who had the same needs as any male, regardless of how he led a celibate life most decades. And with such a proud, naked female in his grasp, he had no intention of suppressing those needs any longer. He'd felt drawn to her before when he smelled her fear on the cliff, saw the shape of her form in the cave, and many other times beyond the counting. And after the weeks spent absent her company, with the belief that she was beyond his reach, it did not surprise him, his ache for her. 

"Sesshomaru?! Did you hear me? Put me down already, dammit!" 

With a growl, he yanked her against him, his length sliding between her legs, not yet penetrating. But she moaned all the same, eyes squeezing shut, and turned her face away, still clutching tight to his shoulders. "If you wish me to stop," he said, "then stop me as you did before; you have the strength." 

"You-AH!" She broke off as he moved against her once more. Her nails raked down his arms. And the smell of his own blood reaching his nose was all it took for him to push inside her again. He dragged his tongue over the line of her throat as she tossed her head back with a heavy groan, only to sag against him, arms around his neck, succumbing to her own desires that left her gasping in his ear.  

* * *

A mortal body was too fragile, too weak, and had this woman still been as such, Sesshomaru never would have tempted fate with the possibility of losing himself to such base instincts. But this night he did, with her and no other. Whether it was their time apart or his own needs he wished to sate, he did not know, nor care, about what drove him to take her. She was willing and responsive and he drank his fill of her again and again throughout the night. At times, they would rest, stretched out upon the ground, a tangle of naked limbs and fur. Moments of tranquility, these were, where he and Lucidity simply laid there without a word passing between them.

Her silence had always appealed to him. Rarely was she one for frivolous conversation. At first he'd believed her behavior to be an aversion to himself and Jaken, until he came to learn that it was simply in her nature, as was her preference for solitude, writing as she would for many hours during their travels. He'd been indifferent to her pensive inclinations before, as he found it convenient that she never bothered him, but now he felt himself curious about what was able to occupy her mind for so long. And when he asked, she appeared surprised, then confused, yet answered him all the same that the journals-as she called collection of blank pages-helped her stay focused. 

As he listened to her explain what she recorded-high and low experiences of life in this era, her opinions on one matter or another-he came to realize that it wasn't a mere tool she used to help her remember, but a way to organize her thoughts, to keep her mind whole. And he suddenly recalled what Rusuban had mentioned, about the purpose the Protector of the Guardian served, to help her remain centered. Did her sanity truly hang in so precarious a balance? If he had chosen to leave instead, what would have happened? The question troubled him more than he cared to consider and the sense of obligation that emerged from the thought was unsettling. He would not leave again; this much he was certain of. She was his responsibility and would remain as such. An odd thing it was, he realized, for he and that hanyou brother of his to have in common, both with women they protected. Though, he wondered how much of his protection Lucidity required when it came to the matter of surviving a battle. If he was to speculate correctly, she was near his equal. And with her potential, there was a high probability that she may surpass him. It was...an interesting notion. 

As the first rays of dawn broke over the horizon, Sesshomaru brought a hand to Lucidity's temple and brushed his claws through the pale strands of her hair. Her eyes, which had been on the patch of sky that had steadily been growing brighter, fell shut and she let out a soft noise that conveyed an air of lazy contentment. It was the first time either of them had moved or made a sound since she had curled up beside him to rest her head on his chest, arms folded beneath her chin, while he lay in the folds of the mokomoko. 

"I wish we didn't have to go back," she murmured suddenly, turning her face to him as her eyes opened.

He made a noise of agreement in the back of his throat, fingers buried in her hair. "It would be best if we did before anyone comes searching." 

"You first," she muttered.

It was not immediate, but he pushed himself up, with her groaning as she sat back on her heels in a huff. Yet she made no complaints and followed suit when he stood and began to gather his clothes to dress. A hand touched the wounds on his stomach, inspecting the damage that still needed time to heal. Two days, perhaps, no longer, but it was not enough of a reason to delay their departure from the Isle. Once he tied the sash into place at his waist, he brought the mokomoko over his shoulder and peered over at Lucidity, who was fully dressed and standing at the ledge, gazing down to the trees below. 

"Lucidity," he called and she glanced at him. "The source of your power, you have not located it yet?"

Her brow furrowed as she frowned and shook her head. 

"It would be of use against the enemy," he said. "We should search for it when we leave." 

"Sesshomaru...." she began, only to trail off, uncertainty filling her expression. Bewildered though he was at the display, he waited silently while she gathered her thoughts, shaking her head again as though to clear it. "Rusuban told me that when I find the source of the Guardian's power, I will also be given the Guardian's memories. She couldn't tell me what that would mean for me, if I would...forget my own or essentially become the last Guardian. I don't...I don't know...." 

He watched her as she chewed on her thumbnail with her gaze on the ground, processing this latest bit of information before coming to a simple conclusion. "You are being ridiculous," he said flatly, and her head jerked up in surprise. "You are too stubborn to be overwhelmed by memories of one long since dead." 

She stared at him, blinking several times, before she laughed. It was a short, brief sound that nonetheless served its purpose and eased her mood, to the point that when he approached, she flung her arms around his neck without warning. "Hey, Sesshomaru," she said and he suddenly found himself questioning the grin that spread across her lips. "Can I show you something?" 

He didn't answer, merely frowned with increasing suspicion, which prompted her to step closer, rising on tiptoe the better to look him in the eye.  

"Do you trust me?" she asked.

His gaze narrowed.

"Is that a no?" 

He closed his eyes and exhaled softly. "Do not ask stupid questions, woman." 

He heard a chuckle in response as her arms tightened their hold and he felt the press of her body against his. "Don't say I didn't try and warn you," she whispered, and then covered his mouth with hers before she pulled him with her off the edge of the mountain. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Show of hands! Who would deliberately cut her (or his) own finger to have it cleaned by Sesshy?


	41. Chapter 41

"Lucidity!" 

The woman rolled away from where they landed on the forest floor, erupting in laughter at his angered shout. She curled up, clutching her stomach, while Sesshomaru was on his feet, none too pleased at plummeting to the earth without form, without control. He could not fathom her motives for pulling such a stunt and could only conclude it was some attempt of revenge for whatever slight she believed he had committed. And when he came to stand over her, his glare was met with nothing more than a smile as she continued shaking with mirth, tears clinging to her lashes. "Do that again and you will regret the thought ever crossing your mind," he said, but the words only brought fresh peals of laughter.

Irked though he was by her behavior, this playfulness was preferable to the melancholy mood he had found her in last night. He watched her as she rolled onto her back, arms around her stomach, and face rather pink in color as she gasped for breath. She grinned up at him, even as he scowled his displeasure at her amusement being at his expense. 

"I'm sorry; I couldn't help it," she said, still chuckling. "Are you really that mad?"

He considered her a moment, the tentative smile, the gentle shaking of remnant giggles that was annoying with most other females, and then he turned on a sharp heel and began striding away. "Come," he said. "I wish to bathe before we return." 

There was no sound of footsteps following him, but rather she appeared at his side after he had gone several paces and fell into step next to him in a soft whirlwind of air; another development he would have to become accustomed to. "Do you have a preference where?" she asked. "I mean, there are hot springs beneath the palace we can use. Or would you rather we find a river, instead of having Inuyasha wrinkle his nose at us?" 

"You believe I care what the hanyou thinks?" he demanded. 

"Well, you did threaten to cut out his tongue last time."

"Should he say anything foolish, nothing more." The talk of his brother, however, reminded Sesshomaru of his brief encounter with Inuyasha and something that had been mentioned, which he had given little thought to at the time; however, circumstances had changed since then. "Inuyasha spoke of people who came to you for help," he said. "Who are they?" 

Lucidity came to an unexpected halt, forcing Sesshomaru to do the same as he turned to peer back at her, bemused at her surprise and the sudden uncertainty that filled her gaze. "Um...you...don't.... Don't get angry with me, okay?" she finally replied, which only increased his bewilderment. "I didn't give them permission or anything. They just decided to show up and I'm not keen on the idea of killing families. I did...I did set conditions, but I told them that they have to answer to you and that I wouldn't stand between you and them, that this is your-"

"Lucidity," Sesshomaru interrupted, his patience thinning. "Enough of your ramblings. Tell me who they are." 

For a moment, she didn't respond, but bit anxiously at her thumbnail, apparently a new habit that had replaced the chewing of her necklace. Eventually, she lowered her arm with a sigh, bracing herself before she answered.

* * *

Jaken's head was bruised, courtesy of the daiyoukai's swift fist. After speaking out of turn not once, but twice, Jaken was fortunate enough to come away with nothing more than a small lump. Sesshomaru's mood was already a dark one and he could not tolerate any further interruptions. His gaze followed the imp to where he hobbled over to the group waiting nearby upon the rocky shoreline. Inuyasha, with his arms folded, glared at Sesshomaru when their eyes met, while the monk, priestess, and daemon slayer remained at attention, ready to spring into battle should there be need. Their presence was useless, little more than an aggravation for the daiyoukai, causing unwanted distractions for him and stress for the snakes. And though there was only one snake who stood before him at this time, the horde, gathered some distance from this meeting place, was well aware of Sesshomaru and the others. 

Of all the creatures who could have known about the Guardian, of all the ones to have sought her aid, it had to be the Viper Clan. Once Lucidity explained her encounter with one of their leaders, Sesshomaru understood the reason for her nervousness. He was, indeed, furious at their audacity for coming into his territory yet again, daring to ask the Guardian for protection, from both the rising power and him. And Lucidity.... He was not certain about his anger with her. The vipers had arrived without her consent, yes, but she had done nothing to turn them away, merely regulated their stay. Learning about her excursions to the mainland, her interactions with those he called his enemy, displeased him greatly. And, in spite of their violent actions in the most recent past, of their confession for what they had intended for Sesshomaru and those who shared his blood, she'd asked him to meet with their leaders on mutual grounds, to consider a truce of all matters. His fury was enough that he had left her company for the day, to wander the Isle alone in an effort to clear his mind and consider the options at hand: a slaughter or a negotiation. 

And yet it seemed as if a peace, however brittle, had been maintained while he was otherwise indisposed. There had been no fights, no deaths, and the barriers had been taken down. To his knowledge, every single member of the Clan was exposed, hundreds of snakes writhing about in their camps, searching for shelter he was unwilling to provide. When he'd returned later that same night, he, with Lucidity's help, had seen for himself through Sagashite the stretch of land inhabited by the Clan just beyond the border of the Isle. He'd questioned her then, demanding the reason she would stay her hand, that she would dare set her own terms for their presence in his lands, however temporary it might be, and her response had been short and...effective. 

Sesshomaru shifted his gaze onto the woman, who stood apart from the others, leaning against a boulder with her arms folded and eyes on the ground. Her anger with him had been nullified, but her shouts still rang sharply in his mind, telling him that she did not fight his battles, that she would not be placed in the middle of a squabble between a bunch of youkai. This did not change the following morning. The moment they had arrived to the mainland and a single leader from the vipers came to speak with him, she had introduced the black-haired snake and promptly "left the boys to their bickering," as she'd put it.

"The Lady Guardian is still upset, I see," said Masami, who was also studying Lucidity's profile. 

"Your attention is best kept elsewhere, serpent," Sesshomaru replied, and Masami inclined his head in a respectful gesture; everything about his manner since the beginning had been as such and that, too, irritated the daiyoukai as he picked up the trail of their discussion. "You would have me believe that your people seek nothing but sanctuary in my territory?" 

Masami gave a single nod. "Yes, Sesshomaru-sama. We came searching for the Guardian of the East, hoping she might protect us. But we understand that her loyalty lies with you and she will not help us unless-" 

"Unless I grant you amnesty," the daiyoukai cut in, a subtle note of disdain entering his voice. "Such a bold request and yet your council risks sending only you to beg me for their lives. They are either insincere or under the impression that my answer will be to return your severed head. Though it does not matter which explanation is correct, the result is, nevertheless, the same: the council continues to plot against me."

"I...will not insult you by denying that most do not believe I will return alive," Masami admitted. "But I assure you that the sincerity of the Elders is genuine. The sickness spreading across the country is a common enemy of my people and yours. There is no benefit to be had if we continue to fight amongst ourselves. Our efforts would be best spent focusing on the true threat to our lands."

"Your words hold truth," Sesshomaru said. "It is the honesty of your claims that I doubt. The deceitful ploys of your council prove only that the vipers cannot be trusted."

Masami, not to be deterred apparently, stepped forward, hands outstretched in supplication. "I know the bad blood between our clans has spanned for centuries and the Elders have admitted that past history has affected their judgment. They would cast that aside now and form an alliance with you, in the hopes of defeating the coming plague."

Sesshomaru slid his arms into opposite sleeves of his haori as his interest and patience began to wane; perhaps he would deliver Masami's head in answer after all. "There is nothing your clan can offer that would be of use in this war."

"Our magic-"

"The treachery of cowards," said the daiyoukai. "Your people have no honor, no pride, and are of no value to me. I have heard enough."

Yet before Sesshomaru could take more than a few steps in an attempt to leave, Masami moved in front of him. Golden eyes narrowed and the claws of one hand slid together as a subtle pull of energy gathered in his fingertips. However, the determination etched upon the serpent's face, crippled though it was by underlining fear, garnered his interest long enough to prevent the Whip from manifesting.

"Consider the Elders, my lord," Masami began. "Centuries it has been, ages before your conception, and they have not forgotten, nor forgiven the Inu no Taisho for driving them from their territory."

"The vipers paid the price for challenging my father; they were fortunate to escape with their lives," replied Sesshomaru.

"Regardless of the battles lost," said Masami, "the Elders have nursed a hatred for your father and his family ever since. Understand that the plague may have forced their plans into actions before our numbers had adequately grown, but it was not the reason for the centuries spent plotting revenge. If losing land was enough to inspire such resentment throughout the generations, imagine what this moment might do. Warriors who are young now will forever remember the lord of the western lands, his refusal to lend aid, and swear an oath of vengeance just as the Elders did in their youth. Your father died before that vengeance could be carried out and he left his sons to pay the price. What would happen to future generations should you perish, Sesshomaru-sama? Would you have them answer for your mistakes?"

The Whip was around his throat before Masami could react and Sesshomaru yanked him to his knees just as he had done to the first viper months ago. There were movements from the others. Inuyasha and his group were tense and alert, hands on weapons, but did not attempt to interfere, while Lucidity turned her head, arms still folded, and frowned at the display, her manner almost disapproving.

"I do not respond to threats," said Sesshomaru.

Masami, panting heavily, peered up at him, eyes glittering with an encroaching panic. And yet the serpent's fingers bit into the dirt as a hard determination filled his gaze. "It is not a threat," he said, voice firm with control. "It is a statement of fact. Those will be the consequences should this alliance fail. I do not care about the past when the future is our concern and many leaders are in agreement with me. We want our people to survive. We ask for peace between our clans, for our sake as well as our children's. I implore you to consider the offer, Sesshomaru-sama, to prevent any future bloodshed. An ancient grudge benefits neither of us or those yet born."

Again, there was truth to the words and an aspect that the daiyoukai had not considered. He was accustomed to dealing with the enemies of his father, of feuds being handed from one generation to another. That was and always would be the way of those who held power. Sesshomaru had never given such matters more than a glancing thought. Family feuds were the same as titles, lands, or weapons: a mantle for the next heir to inherit. Sesshomaru was no different than his father in this sense. And yet, he was no different than his father when it came to other matters as well. Once more, he peered over at Lucidity. Future generations, was it, who needed to be kept safe now? And it brought to mind a new question he had never asked himself before: what sort of world did he wish to leave her with, should he fall in battle the same as his father?

The Whip retracted and Masami, coughing at the relief of pressure, staggered to his feet. Sesshomaru watched as he rubbed at his throat and met the daiyoukai's gaze with a flicker of uncertainty and a hopefulness that was irritating, as if he dared to presume what the outcome was to be.

"You are becoming bothersome," said Sesshomaru. "We are finished here."

"I understand, my lord," Masami replied, inclining his head once more. "But what should I tell-"

"You will know when you have my answer."

"Yes, my lord." Another bow was given, which Masami maintained, the explanation of which was soon given when he spoke again. "May I request an audience with the Lady Guardian before I return to my people?"

Sesshomaru paused. His initial impulse was to decline the request, as he saw no reason for the vipers to have any business with Lucidity. And yet, it was not the woman whom Masami wished to be speak with, but the daughter of a goddess. Her power aside, Sesshomaru continued to think of Lucidity as the gaijin from a hut on the edge of a village. That did not make her less to him, only of a humbler origin than what the vipers perceived her as.

"I do not control the actions of the Guardian," the daiyoukai said. "Make your request of her." And he swept past Masami, eager to put an end to this negotiation. The eyes of Inuyasha and the others followed him as he walked by, but he paid them no mind, including Jaken when the imp tried to address him. Only when he reached Lucidity did he pause long enough to grace her with a quick glance. "You...are insufferable," he muttered.

She blinked at him, then gave a small smile before turning her attention onto the serpent who had approached them. Sesshomaru moved further away, stopping only when he reached the lapping waves of the ocean. His boots sank into the sand as water rushed around him, and he gazed out across the blue expanse that housed the passageway to the Isle. He could hear the soft murmur of voices from the hanyou's cluster, but there was only one conversation that was of interest to him.

"I see that your fortunes have turned, my Lady," Masami was saying and there was a warmth in his words that was ill suited to the situation. "You must be very relieved to have-"

"What do you want, Masami?" came Lucidity's impatient response.

"Ah, yes, I was hoping you might tell me how you were able to cure Sesshomaru-sama?"

There was a moment of silence before Lucidity replied with a soft, "Why?"

"My Lady, surely you understand what this could mean? So many have fallen victim to the plague. If you were to share with us the cure, there is a chance that the medicine might be reproduced and distributed. Not only among my people, but others as well. The humans you favor, for instance?"

"Let that be my concern. Until you've come to an agreement with Sesshomaru, I'm not sharing anything with the Viper Clan."

"But if negotiations were to fail, would you leave us with no means of protection?"

"You forget who I am and who I am not. I have made it clear before that your people are not my priority."

"Might I make this one request from you? There is no harm in asking this, my-"

"Masami, please remind me why Migi and Hidari are not here."

A brief lull fell before Masami cleared his throat, his agitation palpable. "Eeto...that would be because you became upset with them on your last visit and removed the air from their lungs."

"And why did I do that?" Lucidity pressed.

"They overstepped their bounds, my Lady, demanding answers you could not give about Sesshomaru-sama."

"So, even though they survived, there is harm in asking, is there not, Masami?"

"I do not ask for myself."

"I know. You never ask for yourself, but my answer won't change. Settle matters with Sesshomaru first, and then we will talk."

And though it seemed that their discussion was coming to an end, the daiyoukai suddenly found himself impatient to leave. He turned around, just in time to see the serpent straightening up from yet another bow, murmuring his assent and gratitude. Lucidity was shaking her head, declining the gratitude, and the easy air about her did not fit with the formality. When Sesshomaru called her name, she peered over at him, along with Masami, who, for some reason, appeared to be surprised.

"Lucidity?" Masami repeated and looked back to the woman in question, who glanced at him. "That is your name?"

"...yes," she replied after a moment.

"My Lady Lucidity, then," Masami said with a smile and inclined himself deeply at the waist.

Sesshomaru bit back a scowl. "Lucidity!" he called again, louder than before. "I would have us return to the Isle. Summon your servant."

Blue eyes flashed in his direction and the next moment wind was gusting his hair back as she stood beside him, meeting his glare with her own. "You can explain yourself later," she said before crouching down to dip her hand into the water.

* * *

"Fat lot of help that was! We should have just put an end to all this as soon as those snakes started showing up. This isn't even their land and they expect us to have mercy after the shit they've been pulling?!" 

"You can't really blame them, can you? They're just trying to survive." 

"They've been planning this for centuries! The only thing that changed is that they had to take action before they were ready and now they've been backed into a corner. Their only choice is to take the lesser of the two evils, which is us. Doesn't exactly help build the trust." 

"No, but you can't deny that Masami had a point. You could end this fight today and make it safer for your family. I mean, you _do_ have a child on the way, Inuyasha. You should consider it." 

"Keh! In case you've forgotten, this isn't my call. Besides, even if it was, I don't trust that council. Centuries of hatred is not easy to forget." 

"Masami seems reasonable, though. Maybe the other leaders are as well. We should meet with them, too, and see-" 

"Oi! You guys keep forgetting that this truce has nothing to do with us. This is Sesshomaru's business and I don't deal in negotiations unless Tessaiga is involved." 

"What are you planning on doing, Sesshomaru?" 

Gathered around the roots of Hahaoya no Shikyu, the monk, daemon slayer, hanyou, and priestess had been in deep discussion, weighing options, and doing little more than dancing in circles with no conclusions to be drawn. Sesshomaru, having remained nearby more out of habit than necessity, glanced over when the priestess addressed him directly. It was one of the rare moments when he was in agreement with his brother: this matter was none of their concern, and he had no interest in discussing it with any of them. 

"Do you not know yet?" Kagome continued when he didn't answer. "I feel like Masami is telling the truth and it's better to have allies instead of enemies. Lucidity, what do you think? You've interacted with him more than any of us. Do you think he can be trusted?" 

Lucidity, who was sitting on the steps of the veranda and looking over a scroll with Jaken, glanced up at the sound of her name. "Masami?" she repeated. "Well...he's no fool. He's talked his way out of being killed with both me and Sesshomaru." 

"Yeah, but can we trust him?" Inuyasha interjected. 

She shrugged. "He's never begged for his life, just for his people. So either he has a talent for manipulation or he's a passionate leader who just wants to protect his own. He did meet us, expecting to not make it back, so I would be inclined to believe the latter. Really, it's the Council of Elders I don't trust; they appear to serve more of their own self interests." 

"You seem to have given the situation a great deal of thought," said Sesshomaru, speaking for the first time since they had left the mainland. His tone was clipped as he found himself...inexplicably annoyed with Lucidity for being involved with the Viper Clan, for interacting with those belly-crawling animals. Did she not remember how graciously the first two had treated her, no less with the intention of handing her over to the same Elders she would have him contend with?

Lucidity's brows hiked towards her hairline and her expression suggested that she was thoroughly unimpressed with him at the moment. "What did you expect?" she replied. "I was left on my own to deal with them. What would you have preferred I'd done? Killed every last one?" 

"Yes," said Sesshomaru. "They are a threat and must be dealt with." 

"I am not about to slaughter hundreds to settle _your_ affairs!" Lucidity snapped, rising to her feet so quickly that Jaken dropped the scroll in his haste to scramble away, while there was a collective intake of breath from those who stood beneath the tree. "Honestly, why is there no gray area with you when it comes to the vipers? Just have the Elders killed and be done with it." 

It was Sesshomaru's turn to be unimpressed as he fixed her with a cold glare. "And how would my killing their most respected members create an alliance?"

"I don't mean for you to kill them," replied Lucidity as she approached, her movements swift with anger until she came to a stop in front of him. "Masami was the one who said it: their judgment is affected by the past. It's their hatred of you that we can't trust. They're the ones with the grudge, the ones with the magic. Set your terms and be rid of them. Ask for them to lay down their lives in exchange for amnesty and refuge, have them prove their devotion. If the Elders are sincere in wanting to protect their people, then they will agree. If not, then you will know they can't be trusted. And if what Masami says is to be believed, then the vipers will have no one to blame but their own leaders. Hell, they might just kill the Elders outright to show us that at least the younger generation is sincere in wanting this alliance and they really do see the Elders as a hindrance."

A heavy silence hung in the air. No one moved, not even Lucidity, who seemed indifferent to the affect she had created. She had eyes only for the youkai lord, who gazed back at her, at a loss of how to respond. He could not be certain what it was that he felt, beyond the surprise of such an uncomplicated idea being so methodical a solution.

"Shit," muttered Inuyasha, and the moment was shattered as the others began to move about in excitement. "Would that actually work?"

"It's quite possible," said the monk. "There's still a chance that it will fail, but this is an excellent way to test how trustworthy the Viper Clan is."

"It's brilliant, actually," the daemon slayer added. "There is already dissension in the ranks, but something like this would add to the discord. No enemy is a threat if it can be destroyed from within."

Suddenly, the priestess hurried forward and Lucidity turned at the last moment before a pair of arms were flung around her. Sesshomaru caught a glimpse of wide, blue eyes before she staggered back against him and his hands came to her shoulders to keep her upright; though why she would buckle under the weight of a human, he didn't know.

"Sorry, sorry," said Kagome, stepping back. "It's just that...you really are perfect as the Guardian of the East, Lucidity. You're so calm and focused, always looking for an answer. Even when you first arrived, you were so scared, but you didn't waste any time. And it seems like you never fail to find the solutions that you need, even ones you don't expect."

When the priestess glanced at him, Sesshomaru took note of the double meaning of her words and didn't much care for the insinuation, while Lucidity merely shook her head. "Handle the vipers however you like," she muttered. "I'm tired of dealing with them and all this Guardian nonsense."

"Why would you say that?" asked Kagome. 

"Eh...never mind," replied Lucidity. "Shouldn't we be figuring out what to do about the plague of blackness after this business with the vipers is sorted out?"

"Yes, that would be best," the monk said. "If we could locate its source, then-" 

"What about the Viper Clan territory? It started there, didn't it?"

"Perhaps. We have not searched the northern lands yet...."

As group quickly fell into discussion about what course of action to take next Sesshomaru turned his attention onto the woman who was leaning against him. Though her tone had been indifferent, Sesshomaru could feel the underlining tension in her body. His grip tightened briefly on her shoulders. When she glanced back at him, he leaned down and said in an undertone, "I would speak with you alone." 

She raised no objections, but went with him when he turned towards the forest. Other than a demand from Inuyasha about where they were going, which was quickly dismissed by his wife, no one impeded their departure. Ah-Un, grazing in the surrounding field, lifted his heads as they walked by, but did not follow when they disappeared into the trees. Not a word passed between the daiyoukai and woman, their footsteps the only noise that filled the silence, until a trill of a bird cut through the air. Both he and Lucidity came to a stop. The bird sounded again and Lucidity stepped away, turning her head this way and that, searching for a glimpse of the singing avian. Sesshomaru watched her quietly, studying the paleness of her figure, a sharp contrast to the dark clothing she wore. It was unusual, different, but not unpleasant.

"Your suggestion," he said and she peered over at him, "is not without its risks."

She shrugged and turned her gaze back to the trees as the bird warbled once more. "There are risks no matter what we decide. At least this way you will have a better understanding of their motives." 

"The priestess spoke the truth; you are a clever woman." 

She went still at the bald statement and glanced at him with a wariness he could not be certain of. 

"You do not agree?" he asked as he approached her. "I've considered your intelligence a challenge since the first night of our travels. With the power of the Guardian, you've become a formidable opponent to those who would call you enemy." He reached for her, but, to his surprise, she stepped back and regarded him with that same guarded expression. Yet the furrow of her brow, however slight, revealed more than words alone and he withdrew his hand. "You do not wish to be the Guardian." 

It was not a question, but she shook her head all the same. "I never did," she murmured.

"Why?" he asked. "You have been given power most humans would kill for, and immortality that none could hope to achieve." 

"I DON'T WANT IT!" she shouted, but immediately stopped, eyes wide with apparent surprise at her own outburst, before she covered her face with her hands and shook her head. "Gods, Sesshomaru, I just...I don't want it." Lifting her head, she raked a sharp hand through her hair. "I wish people would get that for once. I don't want the power or the responsibility. I don't even want the immortality." 

Sesshomaru was aware that the transition had not been an easy experience for her, to the point where he questioned the resolve of her sanity. And yet he had not given much thought to the possibility that she was unhappy with the strength and abilities that were now hers and it brought another realization to light. "I see," he said slowly and took hold of her chin when she started to turn away. She didn't attempt to break free when he drew her head up to look at him. "You would be content as a weak mortal. That is why the Mother chose you, because you do not seek power; even now you fight Her. Your attack on the Hahaoya no Shikyu is merely an extension of your struggle. And it would be best for you to stop." Her eyes widened and she started to pull back, only for him to drag her forward by her upper arm, still clutching tight to her chin and tilting her head further back. "You need to accept what has happened. You will not survive otherwise. Understand?" 

"Sesshomaru...?" Her voice trailed off as she swallowed and suddenly jerked her chin free of his grip, only to slide her hands along the front of his haori and lay her forehead on his chest. "I know, I know," she muttered. "Gods be damned, I wish I didn't." 

At least she was aware, Sesshomaru thought as he hugged her against him, his chin coming to rest on top of her head. A small noise escaped her, somewhere between a sigh and a groan as her fingers dug at his haori and she pressed her face into the material. It was slight, but he felt the weight of her sag in his arms and his grip tightened. He pulled his head back the better to look down at her, but could see nothing but the crown of white hair traced with yellow. "Lucidity?"

"You still owe me an explanation," he heard her say before she looked up at him. "Your behavior on the beach? You know I don't like being ordered around."

"You made no complaints the previous night," was his automatic response, a mistake he realized too late when she pulled away and glared up at him.

"You...also know the difference between that and today," she bit out, her voice tight with anger.

It was impulsive, the idea and his decision to act upon it, in spite of his uncertainty as to what her reaction might be. Nonetheless, he seized her by the wrists and spun her around, shoving her back into a tree and pinning her arms above her head. Her gasp was sharp and high and he felt the pulse jump in her wrists as she gazed up at him. "Indeed," he said. "You submit to me when your mind is gone with passion and follow my orders when I hold your pleasure in my hand." Her blush was brilliant as her lips parted, his name forming on her tongue, before he claimed her mouth in a kiss. He felt her arch and strain, her hands twisting and clenching under his grasp, but there was no real fight in her. Her lips parted for him and he sated himself with the taste of her mouth.

Less than two days it had been and yet he still wanted her as before. It seemed as if he always wanted this woman. Not long ago he had prided himself on his perfect control. And now whenever he caught her scent, his mind and body were suddenly not his own. Whenever she was around, part of him was always aware of her. The aroma, the taste of her skin on the air, her movements when she walked or turned, even when she frowned at him or shook her head. And with her so close, with her scent surrounding him, he did not care about control or pride or anything beyond her touch. It was...maddening, the frustration, enough that a growl broke from him and he released her wrists, only to gather her up and bring her legs around his waist, pushing her back against the tree, his mouth crushing hers.

"Dammit!" she groaned upon wrenching free, though he still held her tight, his lips moving over the curve of her jaw. "That's cheating. You're-ah, no! No teeth! Tell me-"

"I do not care for your interactions with the serpents," he said after drawing his fangs from her ear. "Masami is too at ease in your presence; I would not have him near you."

"Too...? Sesshomaru, are you jealous?!"

With an abrupt snarl, the daiyoukai lunged forward and sank his teeth into her neck, just on this side of pain that had Lucidity tossing her head back with a cry. She writhed against him, shoving at his shoulders, while he pinned her in place, knowing that if she truly wanted to escape she could easily break his grip, or simply dissolve her form. He pressed himself harder against her, hands gliding over her thighs and forcing her legs more securely around him, and felt her tremble in response, her noises of distress little more than sighs to his ears. As he extracted his fangs, he growled softly against her throat. "Have a care with your words, woman, and do not make such presumptions."

"Sesshomaru...."

His hands began to slip their way into her clothing and he felt along the warm skin of her stomach before his claws hooked into the leggings at her waist.

"No, wait," she said as she brought her hands to his chest and started to push at him again in such a feeble attempt to free herself.

Yet she did nothing more as he slid the material down her hips and his mouth traveled over her throat. She was squirming again and the legs around his waist started to loosen. Without thought, he brought them to the ground, moving her onto her stomach with his arm around her neck, his other hand working the leggings further down.

"Sesshomaru, no!"

He paused long enough to draw himself up, peering down at her with a frown. Her breathing was labored and he could hear the rapid pounding of her heart, but nothing to suggest her abrupt lack of desire. He could still smell her arousal, dripping from her skin like water, and felt the ache of his own need. Clenching his teeth, he lowered himself back down, only for her to stiffen in response. "Why do you not stop me?" he rumbled. "I have told you before that if you wish me to stop that you have the strength to force me away."

"I can't," she murmured.

"Enough of your games, Lucidity. This does not-"

"Something's wrong, Sesshomaru! I don't have the strength!"

Quite suddenly, his mind was clear and he sat up. Lucidity rolled onto her back, adjusting her clothes into place, and his eyes raked over her form. Her wrists, he noticed, were red. He could see the outlining bruises of his fingers where he had seized her and  recalled how she had struggled under Kagome's embrace. 

"What is the cause?" he asked. "The blackness cannot penetrate the Isle, correct?"

She nodded and pushed herself up, only for her arm to buckle without warning. He caught her before she hit the ground and gathered her into his arms as he rose to his feet. "Rusuban," she said, her head coming to rest against the mokomoko as she peered up at him. "Rusuban might know. This...I don't know what's happening. It was gradual at first. I thought I was imagining.... But now, all of a sudden...." She shook her head and closed her eyes.

There was nothing to be done but carry her back through the forest. Sesshomaru was...unnerved by so abrupt a change in her, one that had no logical explanation. There was no blackness to infect her, no battles that could have wounded. She was the daughter of a goddess. What force out there could render her so helpless with no warning, and on her own warded Isle? As he stepped out of the line of trees and began making his way through the field still occupied by Ah-Un, he peered down at the woman and felt a twisting in his stomach that he did not care for. Her eyes remained shut and her breathing was sound, and yet.... 

"Lucidity?" he said in a low voice.

She didn't respond.

He stopped, staring down at the quiet form in his arms, and lifted her closer. "Lucidity?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do love cliffhangers. I wonder if I can end all the remaining chapters on one. Honestly, I don't know how many more chapters we have left here, but I believe it's safe to say somewhere around fifty at this point. Yes, you read that correctly. We're nearing the end, folks! And I hope to make it as exciting as possible for you all. Maybe a spot of violence, bit of action...some more intimacy, perhaps?


	42. Chapter 42

"Asleep?! You claim she is just asleep?!" Jaken shrieked.

"Yes, little imp," said the old caretaker. "All Guardians must sleep, once or twice a season."

"Then why will she not wake?"

"That is the way of it," Rusuban replied, ever patient with the endless questions. "Before the Guardians took on physical form, their power simply went dormant for a short period. Now they sleep and nothing can wake them until their strength is replenished. It will not take long. A day or two, I should think. They are most vulnerable during these times, which is why they return to their sanctuaries if they are able. In this case, my Lady is quite fortunate that she is here with her Protector. Sesshomaru, it would be best to let her rest in the Hahaoya no Shikyu."

"Why is that?" asked the monk.

While Rusuban explained the ways of the great tree and its healing to those gathered in the courtyard, Sesshomaru approached the Hahaoya no Shikyu. He was far from pleased with the situation. Such confusion and worry could have easily been avoided if they'd been given prior knowledge of this deathlike slumber. Coming to a stop beneath the creaking boughs, he peered down at Lucidity, a frown creasing his lips. Worry? Yes...he worried, just as he feared. It was not a new concept to him, merely a new situation. He had assumed the worst and was relieved, for once, to learn that he was mistaken. In the beginning, her short human years were a matter he'd come to accept. But now that the roles were reversed, when it was her immortality that he faced, he still would not lose her.

Footsteps announced the presence of the priestess before she came to stand beside him, her eyes on Lucidity. "How is she?" Kagome asked.

"The same," he answered.

Kagome reached out to brush a lock of hair aside that had fallen across Lucidity's face. It was absurd, but his first impulse was to knock the hand away, to keep any who were not him from touching Lucidity when she was in this state. Perhaps some hint of movement betrayed these thoughts, for Kagome suddenly withdrew her hand and smiled up at him. "I'm really happy for you two," she said. "I'm relieved you were able to work things out."

His sharp gaze cut over to her. "What has she said to you?" he demanded. He knew that some women prattled to one another about private matters. If Lucidity was the sort-

"Nothing," Kagome said, taking a step back. "I promise that she hasn't told us anything. We sort of figured it out for ourselves after you were injured. Really, Sesshomaru, it's a bit obvious that you care about her."

"You would do well to mind your own business, priestess," he said coldly.

Kagome only smiled in return. "You know, I never imagined that Sango telling you to keep her safe would turn out like this, but I'm glad that it did."

His glare did nothing to encourage her to leave. On the contrary, her smile widened and he was the one who turned away in the end, moving closer to the Hahaoya no Shikyu. He peered up at the branches, which had been swaying without wind as usual. Yet when he stepped onto its roots, he was taken aback to see the branches suddenly shift direction and reach down. The creaking of wood grew louder as the tree limbs stretched and weaved and lifted Lucidity out of his grasp. He moved back, until he stood beside the priestess once more, and the two of them watched in silence as the Hahaoya no Shikyu laid the fledgling Guardian to rest high in its embrace. A gust of wind blew around them, tossing leaves and hair and fur, and Sesshomaru couldn't help but dwell on Lucidity's words, about how she did not want this mantle, that she didn't want this fate.

* * *

_The screams would not stop._

_There was so much...so much blood! People were running through it, trampling the dirt until it turned to mud, mud that was most definitely not created by water. Bodies lay scattered in pieces that could not even be distinguished as part of a human. Such chaos, such carnage. The earth trembled and cracked and the blackness slithered to the surface, spreading like molten lava that did worse than burn. Homes were aflame. Crops were destroyed. Families fled for the mountains, for the rivers, for anywhere that might be safe. But they were set upon. Each and every last one, a meal for the infected, those once human and youkai alike. And this was only the beginning. It would spread to the next village and the next until the entire continent was a wasteland of destruction. The islands would be taken, the oceans infested, and there would be no end._

_So much death. So much screaming. It wouldn't stop. Why would it not stop?_

_It was wrong. She was.... That was it. She was wrong, doing something that wasn't right, wasn't the solution. She had to search for a solution. And it wasn't here. The dust of tomes and scrolls and libraries was of no use. She was a fool, a gutless fool who was too afraid to take action, to leave the safety of boundaries. No better than a snake, she was. The snakes...they came for help. And she had to.... She just couldn't ignore the plight. She couldn't ignore the danger._

_People were dying. While she laughed and kissed and lost herself in the brief delirium of happiness, the earth suffered. It was wounded and she.... What was she doing? Everyone was in danger. Everyone would die if she did nothing. Everyone, including her beloved pup._

_Gods, why wouldn't the screaming stop?!_

* * *

Lucidity hit the ground before she understood that she had, indeed, fallen out of a tree. The Hahaoya no Shikyu, to be precise. She stared up at the scarred trunk, blinking rapidly under the late afternoon sun, but the images of her dream still danced in front of her eyes. And that had to be a dream, right? It had been a long while since she'd had one, longer still since she'd been plagued with nightmares. What the hell had all that been about?

Heart racing, she picked herself up and discovered that she no longer felt weak. On the contrary, she could feel the strength in her arms as she flexed her hands. She was full of energy, but not to mention incredibly confused at the same time. Why had she been in a damn tree? And where was everyone? The air was still, no sign of any youkai aura, not even Ah-Un or Jaken. She wondered if Sango and Kagome were nearby, but had barely taken two steps when a mound of earth rose up beside her and she backed away as familiar figure emerged.

"Rusuban," Lucidity said as the old woman shook some lingering dirt from her hair. "What's going on here?"

"Going on?" Rusuban repeated. "It has been quiet, my Lady. We have been waiting for you to wake; you've been sleeping for the last two days. Perhaps a bit longer than expected, but Sesshomaru did not wish to wait anymore, even though I told him you should be rising soon."

Lucidity shook her head. Sleeping? So that was how Guardian's slept? That would have been nice to know, but that wasn't what concerned her. "Where is he? Where's everyone else?"

"They went to settle terms with the Viper Clan. I expect they will be back soon, if all goes well. They haven't been gone too long. Would you-"

"So, they're not in a village or anything?" Lucidity cut in.

Rusuban blinked at her. "A village? No, my Lady. You know that there are no villages around here. Why do you ask? Did the Mother show you something while you slept? Did you have a vision?"

"A vision?" she repeated and, again, those images splashed across her mind, the blood, the screaming, the ground breaking.

"Yes, yes. Here, come with me," Rusuban said, taking her by the wrist. Lucidity allowed herself to be led across the courtyard and up the stairs of the veranda, to the niche that held Sagashite, where Rusuban held her hand above the water. "Think of what you saw while you slept and touch the surface. If it was a vision, even if you do not know the place, Sagashite shall reveal."

Pulse quickening once more and praying that the old woman was wrong, Lucidity did as she was instructed. Her heart immediately sank as the water rippled and an image appeared. The same as the dream...as the vision, she silently amended. She took her hand from the pool and brought it over her mouth, staring at the devastation that triggered a solemn sigh from Rusuban. It was different than the vision. This was the aftermath. There were no people running because there was no one left alive. Bodies that had not been torn apart and devoured were littered with dark veins and froth around the mouth, mere corpses rotting in the sun. Fissures in the ground could still be seen from where the blackness had crawled out.

"Where is this place?" Lucidity murmured.

"North of here," said Rusuban. "Those mountain ranges should be a few days from us."

"Are you sure?"

"I have been around for some time, my Lady. I've familiarized myself with the East's domain. I'm aware that it has changed over the centuries, but I do recognize the mountains here.  Shall I find you a map and tell the others while you prepare to leave?"

"No," was the immediate response. "Get me a map, but don't tell them anything yet. I'll speak to them when they get back." Though what she would say, she didn't quite know yet. Mother. Vision. Attack. Or perhaps...? What was happening with them anyway? Biting down on her lip, Lucidity dipped a finger into the water once more and a new image soon appeared. She leaned closer, as did Rusuban, and the pair of them gazed down at an assortment of youkai and humans. Inuyasha, Kagome, Sango, and Miroku all stood together in the midst of the Viper Clan. Their expressions were tense, but their weapons were not drawn. Their attention was focused on a line of white haired and wrinkled old snakes who knelt in a line near the center of the congregation, about a dozen Elders in all. Some were already dead, bleeding out onto the soil. There was no executioner. Each Elder held a blade to his own throat and one by one joined their brethren in death. That was unexpected; she'd believed they would have turned tail and run.

"I see that negotiations are going well," said Rusuban.

Lucidity grunted and bent closer, having spotted Sesshomaru standing off to the side of Inuyasha and the others with Jaken next to him. And there was Masami with Migi and Hidari, their faces grim but unflinching as the last of Elders crumpled. Then Masami stepped forward, along with more vipers she did not recognize and could only assume they were leaders of the other tribes. He was speaking, but Lucidity had no idea what he was saying. Yet when Sesshomaru went to examine the dead, Masami paused, looking uncertain, and Lucidity felt her lips part in surprise when she saw Sesshomaru unsheathe Tenseiga. Now...that was truly unexpected, and downright ingenious. Watching Sesshomaru cut through the invisible foe of death, a smile tugged at her lips. Judging by the bewildered expressions from all those present to witness, no one had planned for this. Sesshomaru had not made it part of the negotiations. But why should he? The sacrifice of the Elders would have been meaningless if they knew their lives would be returned. And this also meant no one could hold a grudge against the daiyoukai and his kin for making their deaths part of the agreement.

"Oh my!" Rusuban exclaimed when the dead began to stir. "That is quite a sword your Protector has there. It must be an unbelievable asset to have in battle. He'd be able to resurrect his allies and ensure victory."

"Perhaps," Lucidity said. "But it only works on a person once. And it might be able to resurrect a hundred souls in one swing, but I don't think it would be a good idea to do that in the middle of a battlefield. Who knows what he might bring back."

"True. It might be more prudent to take him to the village then," suggested Rusuban. "And any other places that have been attacked. You might be too late to save all of the people, but maybe some could be brought back."

Peering down at the daiyoukai's stoic face, watching the movement of his lips as he addressed the Viper Clan, something churned inside her, a fear so strong and so sudden that she felt sick to her stomach. She didn't like the thought of Sesshomaru going into another village, of the blackness being unleashed again, of the possibility that next time he would not be so fortunate. If something happened to him, she didn't know how or if she could take it. And though it was a constant topic of discussion of all of them going together, what hope did Inuyasha, Kagome, Sango, or Miroku have against an enemy like this, one that was able to nearly kill a daiyoukai by infection alone?

For a third time, she touched the surface of Sagashite, which returned to its soft glow, and glanced over at the caretaker. "Rusuban," she said, "don't mention anything to the others, okay? If they ask, just let them know I'm awake. There are a few things I need to sort out first, but we will probably leave in the morning."

However bewildered she seemed, Rusuban nodded in the end. "Yes, my Lady, I understand. But may I ask-"

"No, you may not," said Lucidity as she stepped away from Sagashite and, without another word, left Rusuban alone in the niche.

Manners were not at the forefront of her mind as she entered the palace. In fact, her thoughts were spinning so fast that there was no one specific issue she could focus on. She had serious doubts that she was ready for this. She didn't have near enough training or even a decent handle on her abilities as Guardian. The accounts that she had read on the previous Guardian revealed just how much she was ignorant of. She didn't know anything about strategy or war or the extent of her own power. Not to mention she still had no idea about where or how to find the damn source of it. How could she challenge this evil with no way of defeating it? Yet she knew she had to do something, otherwise those idiots she cared about would end up getting themselves hurt, probably killed. And the thrill of fear the mere thought induced was enough to convince her that she had to leave. Soon. Now. Not later. She had to leave today. Yet they would follow. There was no way in hell any of them were going to sit this one out, much less allow her to take care of it on her own.

Stopping in the middle of the hall and forcing a few servants to walk around her, Lucidity stared at the floor. She would have to wait until the opportunity presented itself. Tonight, when they had gone to bed. It wasn't much but it would give her a head start. The group might be heading north, but that was a large bit of land to search, both for them and for Lucidity. Yet the source of the plague had to be near the place the Mother had shown her. What other reason could there be for the vision? Though why the Mother would wait so long to give this little tidbit, she couldn't be certain. She hated the idea of playing that bitch's games, but this...it affected her, people she wanted to protect, and she had to ensure that they wouldn't be caught up in the crossfire more so than they already had been. 

"You," she said, stepping in front of a passing servant, who jumped and hastily backed away in a low bow. "Would you be able to speak with the ones who make the meals?" 

"I...yes, my Lady," said the girl, looking like a deer in headlights. "What is it that you-" 

"A large dinner for my friends," Lucidity interrupted. "I want rich foods provided, understand? Is there sake?" The girl nodded. "Good. Just let them know it's just a minor celebration for a successful alliance with the Viper Clan, since will probably be the last time we can relax before setting out." 

"Yes, my Lady," was the demure reply. "Is there anything else that you need?"

"A bath," she said. "And a change of clothes. I'll be heading down to the hot springs shortly." 

The girl gave another bow and Lucidity watched her hurry off, chest taut with the sting of guilt. Heavy foods coupled of liquor would hopefully cause everyone to fall asleep quickly and preferably deeply. Kagome wouldn't drink, but a feast and pregnancy should do the trick for her. Would Sango drink? She had only seen the daemon slayer partake at festivals, but perhaps she would be inclined to this evening. Either way, once the palace was quiet.... Yet, there was also Sesshomaru, the strong and stubborn daiyoukai who would not sleep for another month. What was she going to do about him? She started to mull over potential ways to solve that little problem as she made her way to the double doors that housed the hot springs.

It seemed that, in spite of her initial agitation upon waking, Lucidity was able to gather her thoughts together. So far, her plans were rushed and there was always the possibility that they would fail, but it was better than jumping in completely blind and hoping for the best. In this case, she was only half blind, or so it felt, as she mulled over again and again the issues created by Sesshomaru's presence. And though she remained uncertain about what to do, the time spent down in the springs helped to calm her and she permitted herself a short stint of relaxation with the soaps and oils, luxuries she'd long forgone and would prefer not to give up again. When she emerged from the springs, dressed in a cotton robe and hair dripping wet, she realized there was still no sign of anyone. A quick check in Sagashite revealed they were still with the vipers, in another area than before, but in no apparent danger.

And with that peace of mind, Lucidity returned to her chambers, where she found the promised map left by Rusuban in the den, marked with the destination of where she needed to go. She paced in front of the crackling fire of the hearth as she studied the layout. The route from the Isle to the village would be a nightmare to travel for a human with all those mountains between here and there. Her fingers repeatedly traced the path as she noted landmarks and filed them away, much as she had done with addresses and codes when her job was much, much simpler, a time in her life that she could barely recall at this point. And then she threw the map onto the burning logs and stood there, watching the flames devour the old parchment until naught but ash remained. 

Fuck! What was she going to do about Sesshomaru? 

The question was an echo inside her head when she went into the bedroom and saw several outfits had been placed over the room divider, garments of silken material she still did not know the origin of. If she found the source and retained the Guardian's memories.... Shaking her head, she chose one of the longer, flowing robes speckled with silver and dusty gold. Casual clothes. Leggings or a tunic would be a dead giveaway. If she looked Sesshomaru in the eye, would that be a dead giveaway, too? Maybe she should learn how to lie one of these days. Yet that idea made her feel even worse and the robes were oddly heavy as she pulled them on and fastened a sash around her waist with the usual clasp to hold everything together. Or was it the guilt weighing her down?

And when a whisper of auras on the air announced the return of a certain group of youkai and humans, she definitely knew then that it was the guilt. Her chest was filled with it, as though the breath was being squeezed from her lungs. And her movements were starting to become automatic, with no thought behind the gestures, as she picked up a comb from the same table that held her weapons and went to stand in front of the full length mirror. A decision she soon came to regret. The sight of her own reflection made her want to recoil. Hair gathered in one hand, the comb paused as it was drawn through the ends. Pure white. Her hair was pure white. There was no hint of blonde to be seen. And her skin was hardly different from the fresh powder of snow, perhaps with the barest touch of color in the shape of her lips or the curve of her face. And the eyes...eyes that were too strange, too inhuman.

She looked away, peering down at the hand that held the comb and forced it to move. She had to maintain some semblance of self and ignore the stranger in the mirror, even if the disconnection she felt went far deeper than appearance. She had to focus, just like Kagome had said. Keep her mind on the solution, not the problem. Yet she still could not look at her own reflection without some part of her cringing. In the end, she kept her head down, gazing at her bare feet, and continued pulling the comb through the locks, even after the drying mass was free of tangles. 

The others were moving through the palace and there was a slight scattering of auras as the group separated. Distant shouting could be heard, cheers from the sound of it, which Lucidity would not have been able to distinguish had she still been human. She was grateful for that much, as she would have gone out to investigate otherwise and right now she was hesitant to join. What if they began asking questions? What if her conscience got the better of her and she couldn't keep her composure? But if she didn't go out there, someone might come looking for her and there would be even more questions and....

With a grunt of frustration, she threw the comb across the room, where it skittered across the table, overshot, and hit a wall. A couple of the teeth broke off under the impact and the pieces fell to the floor. Dragging both hands through her hair, she tousled the formerly neat strands into a wild mess for the sheer spite of it all. There was no such thing as neatness in this madness. Everything was a damn illusion. Nothing made sense anymore.

Well, actually, she thought as footsteps reached her ears and she heard the outer door open, perhaps one thing did make sense. Yes, there was only this one little thing, this one aspect of the madness that could possibly make sense right now. And he was rolling the bedroom door open and pausing when he saw her looking at his reflection in the mirror.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the short chapter! And that it took longer than usual. Been a crazy week with Halloween and work and family staying over. Haven't had much of a chance to write. Also struggling a bit with some of the scenes. But I hope to get through it and give you all a good ending!


	43. Chapter 43

Lucidity turned to face Sesshomaru, whose hand lingered on the door frame as his eyes traveled over her. It was usually about this time that she began to feel self-conscious, if it wasn't for the knitting of his brow or the subtle twitch to the corner of his mouth. "What is it?" she asked. "You look confused."

The minute changes in his expression disappeared as he stepped into the room and slid the door shut behind him. "You smell of winter," he said as he approached.

Lucidity blinked. "Winter? How...?"

"Your appearance changes with the seasons and your scent as well, it seems," he said. "It is an unmistakable smell."

"Unpleasant?" she asked.

His gaze, which was still roaming over her figure, flicked back up to her face. "No," was the short reply, only for him to add, "Rusuban advised that you have been awake for a while. Why did you not join us on the mainland?"

"I...er...I didn't know you wanted me there," she said, which was more or less the truth. "I mean, the other day you told me you didn't like my being around the Viper Clan. And besides, from what I saw in Sagashite, you had everything under control; I never thought of using Tenseiga."

There was no reply. Instead, Sesshomaru came to stand in front of her, his face a complete mystery to her in that moment, even as his gaze shifted downward and he reached out to gather up a few wet strands of hair curled on her shoulder. His penchant for touching had never really bothered her, at least not to the point where she didn't want it. Not much had changed, except that she did not exactly feel deserving of his attention and it was all she could do not to pull away when his thumb rubbed over the locks that were now lighter in color than his. 

"The...uh...the Elders," she said in an effort to stay focused. "Everything went well? They agreed?" 

"Most," he replied. "Two refused and were hunted down. Their lives were not returned to them." 

Which explained the reason for the change of location when she had checked on the group a second time. "But the rest, no problems with them?" she asked, still watching those clawed fingers playing with her hair. Why did he insist on doing that?

"None," he said. "Should you not be aware of this? Was that not the reason for the feast and drink your servants provided?"

Her toes pressed into the tatami mats in an effort to keep from shifting around and she fought with herself not to fidget with her hands or even bite at her lip. "Sagashite shows only so much; I just wanted to be sure. And it's a good excuse as any to have everyone relax after all that's happened. Not to mention that the danger hasn't passed and there might not be another chance to celebrate anything if we don't...well...." 

"A reasonable explanation," Sesshomaru said when she fell silent. "What are you keeping from me?" 

Her eyes widened before she realized what was happening. Son of a bitch bastard! Seriously?! She couldn't even last five minutes without him figuring out something was up?! And dammit to hell, she couldn't stop herself from reacting. Heat was creeping along her face and she could feel the pounding of her heart as she tried to take a deep breath, tried to calm herself, but she might have had more success with convincing Jaken that he really was a toad. It took several moments of digging, but she eventually found her voice. "It's...it's not.... It's nothing, Sesshomaru." 

There was a subtle tensing of the fingers as he gazed down at her, his expression the perfect mask of apathy. "You observe through Sagashite to ensure that negotiations are peaceful, yet do not greet us upon our return to see for yourself. You have a celebration prepared, but do not partake, though you state there will be no opportunities in the future if we fail in defeating the rising power. If you wish to lie to me, do so with better grace. Now tell me what is going on." 

Lucidity looked down. She couldn't help it. She wasn't being honest and he knew it. If he knew the extent of it, however, he would do worse than this. If he knew what she was planning, if he realized that she truly doubted that there would be another chance to sit down with Kagome and Sango and their husbands, to throw back sake and be carefree for a single night, he would be furious. She couldn't tell him. She wouldn't! If she did, if he so much as guessed, it would be a disaster. Without a word, she yanked her hair free of his grasp, only for his hand to seize the nape of her neck, drawing her head back and forcing her to look at him. 

His gaze was hard and the way his lip curled suggested that he was about to be less pleasant about getting an answer. Her hands were on his chest, but she didn't remember putting them there. She attempted to pull away, but he simply dragged her closer. A noise rose from her throat, one she did not want to identify; and though it was muffled behind pursed lips, Sesshomaru paused, his eyes narrowing, and, to her dismay, she felt an unbidden sting in her own. "Lucidity," he murmured, his low voice reverberating between them. "What is wrong?" 

Her jaw immediately clenched as her throat constricted. Fingers dug into his haori before she slid her arms around his neck without warning and pushed herself up onto tiptoe. He seemed startled, or at least he did not move to embrace her, even after she kissed him. And it wasn't a brief kiss, but one that lingered, one where she pressed the entire length of her body against his and slipped her tongue between his lips. Yet he wasn't...he only stood there, hands on her shoulders, neither pushing her away nor bringing her closer. The lack of response was worse than the demands for answers. Did he believe she was trying to distract him? Was he simply waiting for her to back off? The mere thought had her eyes burning and her throat tightening, worse than before, and it was suddenly difficult to breathe. She started to loosen her grip and lower herself back down. To be reduced to this.... She could definitely relate to what Sesshomaru had meant.

Without warning, she was dragged forward. Her eyes snapped open as strong arms wrapped around her waist and lifted her up. She caught a glimpse of gold before she felt his lips part, felt the touch of his tongue, and a strangled sob of relief threatened to break from her as she clung to him, closing her eyes and just letting it happen. She'd destroyed him and he'd destroyed her, was still destroying her, and she was...she was fine with that. But gods, she wished her eyes would stop burning. It didn't help that he had picked her right up off the floor, that he was pinning her against him, or that he wouldn't stop kissing her. Her throat was so clogged. She wanted so badly to cry, to weep, to tell him everything, but she couldn't say a damn word. She couldn't let her guilt, her conscience, not any of it, get the better of her. But betraying tears did escape, scorching tracks down her face, and he, of course, noticed. 

The warmth of his lips disappeared from hers, traveling over her cheek, as he set her back onto her feet, and his tongue lapped at the trail of salt water, just it had done to the blood on her hand. Sesshomaru was holding her by the chin and she dared a fleeting glimpse of him, relieved to find his gaze was no longer hard, but searching. Perhaps he would show mercy and not.... "Lucidity?" he whispered and she closed her eyes once more at the unspoken questions hidden in the sound of her own name. 

More tears spilled, slow and sporadic and she felt the touch of his tongue once again. "A dream," she managed, her voice rough with the sheer effort of speaking. "A very...bad dream." 

"Indeed," was the soft reply, "to produce such an affect. Yet you hold back and I would know the reason." 

She couldn't open her eyes. She couldn't look at him. Trying to find words was difficult enough. If she saw his face again, she was certain she would break. And so she dropped her head, even stepped away, hands twisted in the material of his clothes. "Don't ask me," she murmured. "Please don't. I can't...." 

He had her by the upper arms and was pulling her upright, but she turned her head away, her mind racing, pulse jumping, and then nearly stopping when he spoke. "Look at me," he ordered. And when she didn't comply, his hands tightened. "Lucidity, this behavior does not amuse. Regain your senses and explain yourself to me." 

His voice was.... He was angry, yes, but there was a note of impatience that was different. The stress of it was agitated, as if he was unsettled by this whole mess. Was he...was she worrying him? Was he actually afraid about what was wrong, about what had her...like this? Swallowing, she finally opened her eyes, the lashes wet and thick, as she lifted her head. A mistake, she thought the moment she met his gaze and saw the tension around his eyes. She didn't want to do this. She didn't want to lie. Yet, somehow, she had to. She had to stop him from asking, just for a little while, until she figured out what to do.

"Sesshomaru," she said and was surprised at the strength in her otherwise soft voice, "not now." His brow drew down, almost imperceptibly, and she stepped closer. Yet rather than seize him around the neck this time, her hands went to his waist. It was with unnecessary force that she tugged at his sash, loosening the knot, and let it fall, along with the swords that clattered to the floor. He still held her by the arms, but did not move to stop her when she drew his haori open. Her hands slid over the smooth skin beneath, thumbs brushing along his collar bone, before moving lower. She felt the outline of muscles in his stomach, and then traced the tissue of scars from the wound that had not completely healed. Would it ever or was he to always carry the reminder? she wondered, as her mouth came to rest against the hollow of his throat. At the same time, one hand pushed beneath his hakama, feeling the firm thigh, before moving further.

His fingers closed over her wrist as he bent his head down. "This is not like you," he said. 

Her arm hooked around his neck as she stood on tiptoe once more and clamped her teeth onto his ear, hard enough that he let out a grunt and released her wrist in favor of seizing her by the shoulder. Yet she was already dragging her tongue over the reddened flesh and at the same time wrapped her hand around him. "Not now!" she repeated. "Just...give me this. Let me, please, Sesshomaru." Her hand slid over him, stroking the length that was, at first, soft and flaccid until she began to run her lips down the side of his neck. And when her teeth found his skin, she felt his body begin to respond, which, in turn, stirred a familiar ache inside her that was little more than a whisper, at least for the moment.

Suddenly, he took hold of both her wrists and pried her hands from him, keeping them securely in his grasp, and peered down at her with a shadow of a frown. There was no hint of any sort of arousal or need in his expression, regardless of what she had done, of how he had risen to her touch. But then he leaned down and she felt the hard press of his lips against hers, the tongue pushing inside, and it sent her heart palpitating as though it was the first time all over again. She couldn't be certain the reason, other than the underlining dread that she was trying so hard to ignore, the thought in the back of her mind that this felt like the first time because it might be the-

"You _will_ give me an answer," Sesshomaru said. "After."

And he drew her against him, arms tight around her waist, and caught her lips in another kiss, deeper than before, one that threatened to steal the breath from her lungs. Yes, she realized, that was perfect.

Blindly, she gave in, just as he did. She didn't want to think, didn't want to remember. She just wanted to feel him, that hard line of his body against hers, and began pushing the haori from his shoulders and down his arms, the mokomoko along with it. Fur and clothes joined the swords on the tatami mats and Sesshomaru was still kissing her, his hands moving over her back. But when she felt his fingers prying at the sash, she pushed her hands into his and pulled away, only to lead him over to the bed. Having him follow sent a subtle thrill of excitement through her, especially as she brought him around and urged him to sit with a demanding kiss that nearly had him on his back. Her hands were on either side of him, resting on the furred covers, as he leaned back on an elbow, but then he sat forward when she abruptly lowered herself to the floor.

On her knees, she began to remove his boots. First one, then the other, sliding each off with care before setting them aside. Her eyes darted up to his face and she wasn't surprised to find him watching her, that golden gaze so concentrated that she almost couldn't look away when she reached forward. This time, he didn't stop her when she eased her hands inside his hakama and pulled the material down until it pooled around his feet. This, too, was tossed away and, for once, he was the one who was completely laid bare to her while she remained fully dressed. She had never been able to do this, touch him, explore; he'd never given her the chance, not even that night upon the mountain. But now she would. She had to. 

Her lips moved along his inner thigh as her hands came to rest on his knees. Again, she felt the smoothness of the skin, the tautness of the muscle, and could taste the underlining power in every inch of him. And gods, how she wanted it, wanted him, in every which way. Her hands glided up his thighs, squeezing gently here and there, as she kissed and licked her way deeper between his legs until fingers suddenly pushed their way into her hair.

"Lucidity," she heard him say before she glanced up. And yet he didn't speak another word, merely stared down at her, his breathing deep and steady, eyes burning with the intensity of their focus. His jaw worked and something flickered in his gaze, moments before her mouth descended on him. Never had she been able to until this moment. And gods, how she loved the sensation of those fingers tightening in her hair as she swallowed him, the tension in his body, and the way the softest of noises escaped him in spite of his efforts. A soft grunt, little else, but it was enough. She well remembered the touch of his tongue on her, of much she had enjoyed it, and how badly she wanted to taste him in return. And now she did, no hesitation, no stopping. She moved her mouth over the length of him, taking him in again and again, until his hand slid to the back of her head and he started to lean forward. His breathing was growing heavier. Even though he kept his mouth closed, she could hear how he labored and it only made her all the more determined. She wanted to hear him, wanted to feel his body become warm and responsive, to see him fall apart, just this once, under her touch.

And when her eyes darted up, it was to find his shut, his forehead deeply wrinkled, and a muscle working in his jaw. She groaned, her mouth moving faster, drawing on him, and caught a glimpse of fang as his lips curled. The hand in her hair pushed deeper and another noise rose from her throat, reverberated against him, and his body stiffened, his eyes sliding open, only slight, until he saw her watching. Baring his fangs completely, he gave a hard yank to her hair until she released him. She was panting heavily, a moisture between her own legs that made concentrating nigh impossible, as his molten gaze bore into her. When he forced her head back, she moaned, gripping tight to his thighs and trying so hard not to give in, not to submit again.

An effort made all the more difficult when he lifted her bodily from the floor and brought her onto his lap. He pushed her robes up her thighs and slid his hands over the bare skin exposed, claws scraping gently over her backside, down her legs, dragging her to him. He was hot against her, hard and full, and she was quickly losing the battle of control as he pulled the front of her robes open, never minding the sash. His mouth closed over her nipple and his teeth bit at the nub of flesh as he rocked himself against her with an arm tight around her waist. Again. He was doing it again, feasting on her until she broke down, until she was willing to do anything, to say anything.

Wrapping her arms around him, she pushed herself up and nipped at the point of his ear, just enough to elicit a grunt from him. "Sesshomaru," she breathed. "Inside me. Now."

An order. Clear as day. And yet, he complied. With his arm still clutching her by the waist, he guided himself against her entrance and she was so tight with need and he was so swollen that he threatened to rob her of what few sense she had left the moment she felt him. He filled her completely and somehow it still wasn't enough. She moved against him and kept moving, never giving him a chance to respond, to do anything but hold her. Her hips rolled as though it was the most natural thing in the world as his hands roamed over her. She could feel the graze of his claws on her legs, her arms, her back, his mouth on her throat, hot breath ghosting over her skin. Yet she wanted more and kissed him, hard, almost brutally, moaning and squeezing herself around him.

He groaned. The sound was more than audible, unchecked, and she wanted to hear it again. Her lips and tongue traveled down his throat, licking and nipping, until her mouth nearly reached his shoulder and she bit down. In some foggy part of her muddled mind, she was surprised when his hand came to her nape and held her there, even as her teeth sank deeper. His hips lifted her and she moaned, feeling the rising ache that had her trembling, her voice starting to grow louder. And he was thrusting into her, matching her movements, pushing himself deeper.

"Do it," came the rough command, his hand tightening in her hair, fingers twisting, shoving her mouth firmly against the junction of his neck. She tasted blood as her teeth pierced his skin. And the most satisfying, strangled cry tore from the daiyoukai, so feral and unrestrained, and filled her ears as he tossed his head back, his power flaring, and came inside her.

* * *

There was a vague recollection somewhere with Sesshomaru laying back on the bed and rolling them over so that Lucidity rested beneath him. What she did know for certain was that his tongue was exploring her mouth. He wasn't kissing her, per se, but rather searching every inch for some hint of blood. His tongue ran over both rows of teeth more than once, the inside of her cheeks, the roof of her mouth, on top and under her own tongue before he turned his attention to her lips and chin, down her throat, lapping at any part of her that might yield same trace of blood, his blood.

Echoes of pleasure churned through her, a dull throb, but she knew that he was spent, at least for now. She could only hope that his interest had not waned, that he wasn't fully sated, as had happened on the mountain. Perhaps she could encourage him again, if it was necessary. Yet he would not be deterred from getting his answers for long. His mouth was still roaming, though, which had to be a good sign and she let out a sigh at the touch of his lips beneath her ear. He was...a surprisingly attentive lover, for one who commanded so many, to the point where he made her feel spoiled. And Lucidity had to admit, that in these few select ways, she did feel fortunate, privileged even, that he wanted her, that she was the only one who saw him like this.

His hand slid from her chin and came to rest on her shoulder as his mouth glided down the side of her neck. She felt the graze of his teeth, the slight prick of fangs, and tried not to shiver as she reached up. Her hands slipped beneath his hair to touch his back, running along the skin and up to those broad shoulders, simply savoring the heat and shape of his body, relishing in the knowledge that this was just for her, that he was hers. And yet...was he? Her fingers searched until she found the imperfection, the indentation of teeth in his flesh, and she familiarized herself with the contours, wondering at what would possess her to do this, even at his request. 

"What do the marks mean?" she murmured. 

"A primitive manner of a youkai laying claim on another," he replied, before shifting his mouth to the other side of her neck. It seemed that she would not need to put forth the effort to entice him, as she felt a hand push beneath her and work loose the clasp that held her sash together. Soon, he was tugging the length of material out from under her and flinging it to the floor, as well as the clasp. 

"But what is the significance of it?" she asked. "What does it mean for a youkai to claim someone?" 

Though he had just finished pulling her robes apart, Sesshomaru eased himself up, a hand on either side of her head, and peered down at her with his usual, inscrutable expression, yet not quite with the cold indifference of the haughty, youkai lord. "In the archaic roots, it is a show of ownership," he said. "Consequences would be dire if another youkai dared to express interest in one already marked. It was once perceived as law, but has since fallen out of practice. It is more...courtesy now, to respect the boundaries of those who have promised themselves." 

"Promised?" Lucidity repeated. "To claim someone...or be claimed is how youkai promise themselves to each other?" 

He gazed at her for a space of heartbeat before he gave a single nod. 

She swallowed and it took a moment to find her voice. "Is that why...you...wanted me to...?" 

"If it is not what you want, I will allow it to heal," he said, and her heartbeat instantly doubled. His eyes flicked down and he suddenly brought a hand to the space between her breasts. His palm lay flat and his fingers spread out, which only served to trigger her pulse to greater heights; there simply was no hiding anything from him, though she tried so desperately. "Is it what you want?" he murmured, his voice resonating between them. 

"I...er...." Her mind scattered when those golden eyes met hers. Her heart was in her throat and she had to...take a moment and remember how to breathe. And he waited in silence, his gaze moving over her, but his hand remained where it was, and she was quite conscious of every inhale of air she took, how her chest heaved, just how exposed she was, in more ways than one. "It's...." she started again and felt his fingers twitch against her skin. On impulse, she reached up and gripped his hand, squeezing slightly. "It's the only thing I know for certain that I want." 

It definitely wasn't her imagination. However subtle it was, she saw the way his shoulders sagged, if hardly by an inch, and felt the tension ease from the fingers she held. His expression never changed, but she knew. He was relieved and, in spite of the little beast of guilt gnawing away inside her stomach, she managed to smile. He didn't say a word, but laced their fingers together and pinned her hand onto the bed. His touch was gentle, slow, as was the kiss when he pressed his lips to hers. There was nothing feverish or hurried about his manner. Even as he laid himself on top of her, there was no rabid need to take, but a careful patience to enjoy. And she was grateful, so very grateful, for every last part of it, of him. 

His mouth drew away and she felt his breath on her chin, moving down her throat, where his tongue glided over her skin. "Then," he said, "I shall assume that, when the time comes, I am permitted to mark you?" 

She had to clear her throat, but even so managed only a feeble "yes," and that seemed to be all he needed. He was suddenly moving down, his hands running along her sides, to her hips, his mouth trailing between her breasts and ribs, over her stomach, before lifting one of her legs onto a shoulder. It was when she felt his lips near her navel, traveling lower still, that she bolted up onto her elbows and blurted out, "Not down there!" 

Sesshomaru snorted and clamped his teeth onto her stomach, his shoulders heaving slightly as he took a breath. She was...quite certain that was his version of a laugh. "Idiot woman," he murmured, and there was a faint trace of warmth she wasn't entirely accustomed to hearing in his voice. "I wish to taste you." 

"You...but...you don't want me to clea-"

"No," was the short reply. "I would have you as you are." 

The first stroke of his tongue had her shuddering. The second and she was laying back down. And by the third, she was forgetting what temporary insanity had prompted her to protest, if only briefly. He was steadily working her into a frenzy of ecstasy, tormenting the little knot of pleasure between her legs, and she really couldn't think of anything else, nothing beyond this room or this bed. She truly was fortunate to have him, to have his favor, to know his touch. And moments before her climax, when his mouth drew away from her and the bed dipped as he settled himself above her, the weight of his body sinking onto her, she knew she didn't want to be anywhere else in the world, no matter the era. He entered her with a practiced ease that had her arching her back and moaning in his ear. She clung tight as he moved, his face buried in the crook of her neck, and she committed it all to memory, every last detail: the crown of silver hair; his arm above her head; the claws digging into the covers beside them; his body sliding against hers; the sweat on his skin; the soft, almost inaudible grunts of breath that escaped him with each movement of his hips; the scent of him; the feel of him inside. She didn't want to forget any of it. And when she gripped tight to him with her nails digging into his skin, crying out as the orgasm rolled over her, and heard the heavy groan in her ear as he succumbed to his own, she realized that she would rather die than allow anything to happen to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, such a perfect moment. I wonder what will ruin it.


	44. Chapter 44

Lucidity was half expecting Sesshomaru to mark her then and there. Yet it didn't happen after the second time or even the third. His focus seemed to lie elsewhere and his appetite was an insatiable one. Was this normal for youkai? He'd been demanding like this once so far. Yet their first time together, she'd still been human and it was reasonable that he would be careful of her limitations, to not push for more. And the second...well, that had been short and not so sweet. Now it appeared that they were both able and more than willing to make up for lost time. And Lucidity...she needed the distraction, now more than ever. At any point when there was a lull, her thoughts began to spin and she would do her best to ignore what needed to be done, what she should be doing, instead of procrastinating the inevitable, of stealing one more moment of bliss. It was selfish, she knew, but this was not an easy decision. 

And it only became all the more painful when she finally did feel those fangs in her skin, penetrating deep until blood was drawn, and she cried out in the mixture of agony, pleasure, and confusion that it produced. His jaw was locked onto the back of her neck, the same as before, and she was on her hands and knees with him bearing down on her, the same as before. And yet this was different, so very different, right down to the waves of ecstasy that left them both spent among the furs and pillows of the bed. She came to rest on her stomach and he was on top of her, the weight of him comforting and thrilling simultaneously. She could hear his soft panting as he extracted his fangs, and then felt his hand in her hair, pulling the locks aside, as his tongue bathed the still bleeding wounds, While she lay there, arms beneath her head, fighting against the tide of reality that threatened to flood what remained of her little haven, she could feel a twinge, the slightest twinge, of regret. 

A surge of unexpected, albeit gentle hum of energy brought a gasp to her lips and drove those unwanted thoughts from her mind. Starting from her neck, it traveled down her spine and she arched against the daiyoukai, who pushed her back down with an absent gesture, his mouth against the mark. But it was only when his power receded that she was able to relax and he soon shifted so that he was laying beside her, an arm around her waist, dragging her to him so that her back was against his chest. Gods, how she wished they could simply fall asleep, such a small, inconsequential thing she never imagined she could miss.

"What was that?" she murmured, taking his hand from her stomach and gathering it to her chest. 

"My energy is laced inside the mark, with residual traces in your blood," he told her. "It will allow the injury to scar."

Lucidity grunted and drew her legs up slightly, pressing closer. "So claiming is more than a physical mark. I'll essentially be carrying around a piece of you." 

"The barest amount," he said. "But enough for others to know that you belong to this Sesshomaru."

"How possessive of you," she muttered, even as her pulse threatened to beat beyond her control and something twisted in her gut, and his arm immediately tightened around her. She felt him move and suddenly his mouth was brushing against her ear. 

"Do not make light of this," he growled softly. "I have never been so inclined towards a female-" 

"I know," she said, rolling onto her back and peering up at him, as he fell silent. "Believe me, I know. And I'm not making light of this. I just...." Feel like a wretched excuse for a person, she thought to herself, unable to finish her sentence or even maintain eye contact. She moved onto her side, facing him, and started to curl up, to place her forehead to his chest, only to be stopped when his hand gripped her shoulder. 

"Lucidity, tell me what troubles you."

No, no, no! She didn't want to. Dammit to hell, she didn't fucking want to! But it was as if the last several hours had never happened. Reality had reared its ugly head and a wave of nauseated panic churned in the pit of her stomach. The night of stolen bliss was gone and she rolled away, beginning to clamber out of bed, when Sesshomaru caught her by the arm. Without looking back, she wrenched herself free and stood. "Not here," she said. "I don't want anyone to overhear us." 

"The others have gone down for the night," Sesshomaru said as he, too, rose to his feet. "There is no one of note who will eavesdrop." 

But she had already reached the room divider, her hand gripping its edge, as she glanced back at him, dread filling her like a horrible beast about to be unleashed. Yet she took a breath and forced herself to look at the daiyoukai. "I know," she said. "But believe me when I say we cannot talk here." And then she stepped behind the divider, out of sight, and buried her face in her hands for the briefest second, hating herself for even longer, before she turned her attention to the outfit, a tunic and leggings that the servants always laid out back here for her, and began to pull on the clothes. By the time she had slipped on the boots and emerged, Sesshomaru was fully dressed and was sliding Tenseiga and Bakusaiga into place through his sash. Her gaze lingered on the swords before she grabbed Hogosha in its leather pouch from the table and tied it to the belt at her waist.

"You intend to leave the Isle," said the daiyoukai, and she paused for a moment before looking up and nodding mutely. "And you will explain the reason after we have left the palace?" Again, she nodded and he watched her for a heartbeat or two longer, then turned towards the doorway.

"Do you trust me, Sesshomaru?" she asked, hardly above a whisper, and he stopped, peering back at her, as she walked up to him until they were nary a foot apart.

"You are asking stupid questions again, woman," he replied.

"I'm aware," she said. "But I want to hear you say it."

He didn't speak, but gazed down at her before reaching out and placing his hand on her nape, where his fingers brushed over the fresh scars. "I trust you."

Her eyes fell shut and she lowered her head, wishing the next second would never come, that they could stay right here, without worry, without responsibility. But when she felt his hand move, she opened her eyes and stepped back. "Then please trust my motives when I tell you," she murmured. "For now, just come with me and I will let you know everything."

He didn't argue, didn't even hesitate. He took Lucidity at her word and allowed her to spirit them out of the palace. There was no struggle from him, merely an acceptance, perhaps an indifferent one. Yet the further from the palace they traveled, the more she felt a sense of increasing bewilderment and she couldn't blame him. As far as he was aware, there was no reason for them to venture so far from the others to simply speak in private. Could he feel her emotions as she did his? Could he feel her trepidation, how distressed she was, her utter reluctance to reveal the truth to him? She hesitated to even take solid form again, because the moment that she did, the moment she saw him, that was it. The illusion of peace would be over and they would be back in the real world.

Near the mountain, in the area where she had so often trained alone, where there was enough distance between her and the palace to ensure the safety of everyone else, Lucidity brought herself and Sesshomaru to a stop and backed away the moment their bodies were corporeal once more. He took in his surroundings with a vague interest and she could only stand there and watch him, her heart a deafening drum throughout her entire being. And then she looked away when those golden eyes turned to her and heard him utter a single word: "Explain."

Hands tightened momentarily into fists at her sides and she inhaled deeply, closing her eyes, before resolving herself. This... _had_ to be done. "The Mother," she heard herself say, gaze on the grass near the daiyoukai's feet, "while I slept, she showed me what has been happening. I dreamt of the blackness, of the mass death it is causing, and that it will not stop here. It will spread to the rest of the world, until there is nothing left."

"This is an outcome that has already been considered," said Sesshomaru. "There was no need to bring me out here to discuss-"

"I know where to go," Lucidity interrupted, looking up. "The Mother showed me this as well, and I don't want the others involved; it's too dangerous."

"I see," was the slow reply and Sesshomaru's gaze drifted in the direction of the palace. "You ply them with food and sake to incapacitate them while you take your leave. My brother and his companions are not without their use, but if you find them to be a hindrance, I shall abide your decision." A sigh broke from her and a careful scrutiny sharpened his expression. "You feel guilt for deceiving them?"

She shook her head. "I'm doing this to protect them. I don't want them anywhere near the enemy. I don't want anyone near this. It's my responsibility."

"Anyone?" he repeated, and when she nodded, he spoke in a voice underlined with heated disapproval, "Of that, I will not agree to."

The words churned through her like a knife. It was all she could do not to turn away again, not to close her eyes and beg the Goddess to put an end to this, to grant her just this one reprieve. Yet, somehow, Lucidity managed to remain upright, her gaze never leaving Sesshomaru's, and had no trouble, absolutely none, in finding her voice. "I know," she said. "I know you would never agree."

The ripple of surprise through the otherwise stoic countenance was brief before his eyes narrowed in understanding and a visible tension seized him. There was no hesitation as his fingers began to glow a faint green and a despairing resignation settled over Lucidity. No turning back now.

Sesshomaru had yet to raise his arm, but the gathering energy was a sharp sting to the senses. "Lucidity, what is the meaning of-"

No thought. No flick of the wrist. A reflex was all that was required and his voice cut off mid-sentence, lips parted and eyes widening, as every last ounce of breath was stolen from his lungs. It had been on impulse, when she'd done it to Migi and Hidari. She could call forth great gusts of wind. Why not do the opposite and banish every last molecule from a space? And the theory had worked, with satisfying results. The serpents had thrashed and flailed like fish on land until rendered unconscious. And yet there was nothing the least bit satisfying in watching Sesshomaru struggling to breathe, to see the fury darkening his face and the Whip hurtling through the air.

Lucidity did not fight fair. It would piss him off even more, she knew, but she would not risk his following. She just needed to buy some time. So, when he attacked, she disappeared. There was nothing for him to slice at but open air. And even then, she stayed well away from the Whip. He brought it down only once, though, before he turned, searching with eyes and ears and some other senses no doubt. Yet before he could raise his arm again, she struck him from behind with enough force to send him flying several yards until he was able to right himself.

He didn't intend her true harm, she noted, when he cut at the air once more, right where she had been drifting on the current a second ago. He never even reached for Bakusaiga. He was trying to wound, not kill, trying to free himself from the trap she had set, and yet restrained himself from truly harming her. Over and over, they did this little dance, with Sesshomaru hacking at the traces of her essence and Lucidity dodging out of the way, until he dropped to a knee, bracing himself on a hand that was absent the gleam of the Whip. He was deathly pale and there was a sickening hue of blue around the outline of his lips. With the distance growing in his eyes, she knew the lack of oxygen was getting to him. Longer than it had taken the vipers, than it would have taken anyone else, she was certain. And she loathed every single moment of it.

And then, in an unexpected, searing burst, his power was unleashed. Like an explosion, it burned through the air, burned through her, and she materialized with a shout of pain. On her feet, bracing herself with hands on her knees, she looked up into the pair of scarlet eyes that were drenched in energy, and yet sliding in and out of focus, even as the daiyoukai managed to stand. That little display, however, had nearly broken her control. Nearly. But when she felt the draw of his energy once more, saw his hair and fur swirling in its wake, his fangs and claws becoming sharper, she bounded forward. If he transformed, if she allowed him to tap into his full power, she would fail and have one very pissed of daiyoukai hounding her every step.

In a show of brute strength, she slammed him so hard into one of the many surrounding trees that the trunk snapped and the two of them were sent tumbling to the ground in a spray of splintered wood and leaves. They grappled as they had done the first night when she came into her power, rolling over and over, each trying to gain the upper hand. Yet, this time, the true war was with the clashing auras, her crackle of energy colliding with his. She could feel the heat of it on her skin, almost unbearable it was. But hers burned just as hot, just as bright, and pushed back against his. Not unlike how a snake would wrap around its prey and squeeze the life out of the unfortunate victim, she bound his power with hers and soon felt the connecting thread of his start to fade. And when she managed to shove him onto his back, pinning him by the shoulders, he still held her tight and yet made no attempt to throw her off him.

"I'm sorry," she said in a hoarse whisper as the red faded from his eyes. It seemed to cost him every last ounce of effort to focus on her. "I know you'll be angry later, that you're angry now, but please understand. I can't risk you. I won't. It will kill me if anything happens to you." He could only bare his teeth at her, the malice in his gaze unmistakable. Her smile was one of great bitterness as she leaned down, her cheek brushing along his as her lips came to rest near his ear. "Please forgive me. I wish we had more time. I wish I could find a better way to show how much I love you."

Would he hate her for this? She could only wonder as he gripped her so hard she could have sworn that his claws were about to pierce through her clothes and right into her skin. She felt his body arch against her in a renewed effort to break free. A futile effort it was, too, as all fight went out of him and the hands slipped from her arms, landing soundlessly on the grass. Pushing herself up, she peered down at the daiyoukai, at the stillness of his face and body, at the chest that did not move. She held on a little bit longer, denied him the very thing he needed to survive, and silently marveled at the simplicity of it. He was so powerful, beyond anything she could have imagined not too long ago. And now.... Was she stronger or was it that she had less honor with using tricks and deceit?

Sliding her hand over his cheek, she turned his face up and pressed her lips to his. Oxygen filled his lungs once again as she kissed him. She felt his chest rise, his breath against her mouth, and satisfied herself with knowing that he would live. If his hatred was the price to pay, so be it. She drew back, very much aware that he would hunt her down, if only to return the favor. She hoped this was enough to prevent him from finding her and that he would eventually forgive her, if the chance should ever present itself.

* * *

The worst part of awakening alone on the forest floor was not the ache in his temples, nor the painful realization of his defeat, but rather her face being the last thing he saw, her voice the last thing he heard, and her hand that had dealt what would have been a fatal blow if she had been so inclined. It was the hard fact that was the worst part, of knowing who had done this to him. Lucidity had tricked him...bested him. He never quite comprehended the untapped potential of her strength until this evening. He had not been able to break her hold on him, not on any level, and he was not certain if it was because she had deprived his body and mind of the breath necessary in order to function.

It was fitting for a daiyoukai of his standing to choose a female capable of such power, and yet he found himself preferring the weak mortal who could break a fist on his jaw if she dared to strike out at him. Now it was the daughter of a deity he had to track down and contend with. That stupid woman! Did she not realize the danger?

Palm pressing against his throbbing temple, Sesshomaru briefly shut his eyes before he sat up and peered down at his other hand, at the scar that burned red hot in his skin. It was the pain that had stirred him back to consciousness and he did not have to wonder at what threatened Lucidity's life this time, her own idiocy among the reasons. Yes, he decided, she knew the dangers. That was the reason she was being so reckless a fool again. It was the reason she had brought him out here. She planned this from the start, the same as she had done the feast. He understood now, her behavior, why she had begged, why she had wept, and why he had tasted her desperation every time she touched him. Even when he had marked her and she him, when he had explained the significance of the act to her, she still saw fit to betray him so that she might confront the rising power alone. She clearly had a death wish.

Her parting words echoed in his memory and the swell of fury she had so easily predicted seized him. She truly was a fool! She knew the consequences and yet charged headlong into the foray. And he could not follow. There was no trail to be found. Her scent ended here and the currents of power were long gone. Where was she going? What had the Mother shown her? And how was he to find the answers when she had kept the knowledge to herself? The Mother revealed no path to him when he turned on the spot, as She had done when the vipers had taken Lucidity, another lifetime it seemed. How would he find her? Who was left to interrogate?

The answer came to him like a ripple through the air and, without conscious decision, his form coalesced into a spherical light and he returned to the palace, only to be met with a mild surprise awaiting outside upon the veranda. Inuyasha had not indulged in drink. Of course, he would not on the night of the new moon. Black-haired and human, he must have roused the others, for the priestess was with him, carrying with her a bow and arrows, as though expecting the arrival of an enemy. Wariness was etched in the lines of their faces as Sesshomaru's booted feet echoed upon the steps of the veranda. 

"What happened?" was the immediate question from the hanyou. "We could feel your battle from here. Who were you fighting with? Is it the vipers?"

"Rusuban," the daiyoukai said, causing the other two to be momentarily dumbstruck before he spoke again. "Where is Rusuban?"

"Why?" Inuyasha asked. "What the hell-where are you going?"

Footsteps echoed after Sesshomaru as he made his way into the palace, having no patience for questions. On the other side of the door, he was greeted with the unwelcome sight of the monk and daemon slayer, both fully dressed with their weapons ready and looking startled at his appearance. They darted out of his way. Further down the hall, a stumbling Jaken, who reeked of sake, was not so fortunate. The Staff clattered to the floor as the imp gave a feeble twitch beneath his boot, while Sesshomaru continued to track the scents of the palace until he found the object of his search in the last area he wanted to set foot in.

The ceremonial chambers were the same as before: ruins of fallen grandeur. The only difference from his first visit was the sole occupant of the room, standing before the broken altar, her cracked and wrinkled face heavy and forlorn as she looked upon the wreckage. Two items were clasped in either hand. The least impressive was a scroll and the other was...unexpected. Rusuban raised her head when Sesshomaru approached and laid his armor and pauldron on the ground at his feet, while the others gathered around.

"You knew," Sesshomaru said, staring at the armor that had been shattered by the Sisters.

"My Lady commanded me not to speak of it," replied the old caretaker. "She was quite earnest. I was aware that she might depart on her own. I am loyal to the Guardian, but...her exact orders were not to reveal anything _yet_ , not until after she had sorted out a few matters first. It is clear that she has done just that. " Rusuban held out the scroll. "She burned the map I gave her, to hide her intentions, but this one is for you, young protector. I have marked my Lady's destination, but you must hurry. She travels swiftly and will not stop to rest."

Sesshomaru reached for the scroll.

The priestess let out a gasp just as his fingers closed over the parchment. "Your hand!" she exclaimed. "Sesshomaru! What is the matter with your hand? Why is it red?"

"That's the Mother's mark, isn't it?" said the monk. "That means Lucidity's in peril."

"Where is she, Sesshomaru? Tell us what's going on," demanded Inuyasha.

Sesshomaru said nothing as he studied the map, his eyes tracking the route etched upon it, in the very direction the others had anticipate.

"Why did she go off on her own?" It was the daemon slayer who was speaking this time. "What prompted her to leave? Where is she even going?"

"The blackness, that has to be it. She must be going after the blackness and the evil that brought it."

"How could she know where to go?"

"She obviously found a way. If her scent could be tracked, this would be so much easier, but when she breaks down her form, it vanishes. Give us the map, Sesshomaru. We need to figure out where she's going before she gets herself killed."

When human fingers dared to close over the corner of the scroll, Sesshomaru's fist connected with the hanyou's face. He took care to minimize the impact, as there was no honor in killing Inuyasha when he was at such a disadvantage, tempting though it was. Yet the force of the blow was still enough to knock Inuyasha clear off his feet and send him skidding across the ground. Shouts of surprise and anger filled the chambers, but none attempted to stop the daiyoukai from approaching the dazed and currently helpless human, who was shaking his head and trying to push himself up. Sesshomaru glared down at the pathetic whelp and felt his lip curl as he tossed the scroll beside him, in the dirt where the wretched hanyou belonged.

"Follow if you so choose, Inuyasha," he sneered. "I will not be the one to dig your grave, but know that I will send you there if you get in my way."

If any reply was forthcoming, Sesshomaru did not linger to hear it. He did not care to listen to anymore of their inane prattling and turned away from the shocked expression on his brother's face, striding past the cluster of humans and imp who didn't budge a muscle until the danger was gone. He heard the others speaking to Inuyasha, heard the hanyou struggle to his feet and mutter some affirmation that he was fine, that they should leave. Jaken called out, reminding his master about the armor and pauldron, that he would need it for the coming battle.

Useless. All of it. Going up against an enemy the likes of which they were about to face was a death sentence for any human and almost any youkai. Not even Sesshomaru was certain he, himself, would survive. And though he sought to fight only the strongest and most powerful, he found no satisfaction in the challenge. Claws bit into the aching scar as his hand clenched into a fist. No...there was no satisfaction, no excitement to be had. There was only anger...and the sour taste of fear that those parting words would be the last he would ever hear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to say...knocking out your significant other is one of the worst ways to confess your feelings.


	45. Chapter 45

It was endless.

If Lucidity had not seen for herself, she never would have been able to imagine the utter destruction that awaited beyond the Isle. The further north she traveled, the greater the devastation became. Every village she came across had been set upon. Entire communities destroyed with only bits and pieces that remained to recount the story of what had happened. Bodies scattered the lands, sometimes whole, sometimes not. The infected, at least those who were human, could not continue for more than a couple days at most, or so she surmised, before they dropped dead on the spot. Youkai, on the other hand, were more widespread and it was these infected that Lucidity often dispatched to prevent both the chaos and the disease from spreading. Survivors were seldom located. And even if they had managed to escape, the ones she had come across were not entirely fortunate and there was little hope for them. So wrapped up in her own personal matters, she never stopped to consider anything beyond the immediate future of escaping the Isle without detection. She never once gave thought to collecting the sap of the Hahaoya no Shikyu, so that it might be used on those who were ill, as Sesshomaru had been. Perhaps she, herself, might need it at some point during this little misadventure, if the burning scar on her palm was any indication.

Finding these victims created a new problem, though. Humans were wary of her, believed her to be youkai. Even the ones she saved during an attack on their village that had been overrun with the infected were hesitant to trust her. She couldn't really blame them for doubting the strange foreigner with white hair and a glowing scythe. Yet whether Hogosha was sealed or not, few were willing to listen, regardless of when she revealed that there was a cure for the ones who had not yet succumbed to the sickness. One particular man screamed that she was a daemon trickster who would devour their souls or some such nonsense. His inevitable, would-be attack was thwarted with nary a thought and by then she was at the end of her patience. The survivors were given an ultimatum: either take what she offered or she would kill every last person who was infected, for the sake of keeping the rest of the countryside safe.

Cooperation was suddenly easy after that and Lucidity was able to summon one of the servant girls through the nearby river to take the survivors back to the Isle with explicit instructions of what care and measures were necessary, including where the Viper Clan was concerned. Learning that they were to share this sanctuary with youkai created renewed protests and further conflict and, in the end, not all went onto the boats. And, as promised, those marred with black veins were quickly dealt with. Simple deaths, they were. The ill were unconscious, after all, and were not difficult to pick out from the healthy ones who attempted to protect them. Lucidity loathed being the cause of more screams, of more suffering and bloodshed, but this was the cold, hard reality of the matter. If she had dealt with the rising power sooner, if she had not lingered on the Isle and dared to live an illusion of happiness, none of this would be necessary. This was her mess, her responsibility, and these were the pieces she had to pick up. 

Only a handful made it to the Isle in the end. She was, in all honestly, surprised that any would be willing after witnessing such a lack of mercy. Yet when she watched the boats disappear into the mist, her gaze came to rest on one refugee: a young, frightened mother cradling a small, unconscious girl no older than two, whose neck was spotted with black. The sight had Lucidity quickly amending her opinion, as some parents would risk everything to save their children. And yet, shifting her attention on the bank, her gaze roaming over the bodies that littered the ground and the blood that stained the soil, she found that other people were too cowardly to take a chance to save so much as themselves. With a deep inhale, Lucidity closed her eyes and tilted her head back, feeling the telltale prickle of tears. If only...if only they had agreed.... 

This was just one of many encounters. But with each village she came upon, with every interaction she had with humans and youkai alike, one glaring factor remained: there was no sighting of the blackness. The resulting chaos was the only evidence to be found and her frustrations were mounting. By every indication, these attacks were recent, as though she was mere days from closing in. It was beyond aggravating. If she could just get a handle on the madness that gripped the land, if she could contain it somehow.... Yet to contain it, she had to stop the sickness at its source. So, it was a choice between ignoring the plights of the people she came across and continuing on her way to deal with the threat itself or, well, be a bleeding damn heart and offer refuge to those who had lost their homes, children who had lost parents, or parents who had lost children, and.... Dammit to hell! What choice was there? 

Yet, every time she stopped, she was delayed, whether by minutes or hours. Rusuban had predicted that the journey would take a few days. Lucidity had been certain she could cut that time in half; she hadn't been expected to be so caught up with...well, helping people. She wasn't accustomed to it, not to such a degree. After three days, the loss of time was starting to agitate her and she was becoming less and less eager to inspect villages or render aid. And whenever she did find people, she sorted out the situation as quickly as possible before going on her way. She wanted this entire matter over and dealt with, regardless of what it might mean for her in the end, because the pain in her hand never stopped. Yet...so long as the others were safe, it was worth the price.

Finally, on the morning of the fourth day, which dawned with a sky darkened with storm clouds, Lucidity reached the village. At the very first glance, she knew it to be the right one. Mountain ranges aside, she recognized what remained of the structures, the patterns of the huts that seemed to be carved into the side of the mountain, making it appear as if a human settlement was slowly creeping down from the wilderness. There were no humans here, of course. Nothing was left alive or even whole. No bodies marked with black veins could be found and she could only assume that the infected had moved on to die elsewhere. The silence was absolute here, just as it had been on the Isle. No animals, no insects, nothing beyond the sound of her own footsteps could be heard. She felt the first stirrings of adrenaline kick up as she walked the empty paths, the air filled with the stale smell of death. No pyres had been constructed. No signs of cleanup. Damage among the buildings could be seen, carts overturned, food and supplies left where they had fallen, half-devoured meals inside homes, projects left unfinished, and so much more. It was as if the attack had come without warning and people had been forced to drop everything and flee for their lives. That was the very likely scenario, from the glimpses the Mother had given her. And, if what she remembered was true, no one had survived. 

Partway through the village, she came to an abrupt stop. A perfect boarder was formed in the ground, signifying where the healthy soil ended and the rot began. Just as it had been when she and Kagome had inspected that field, the dirt here was dark in color with the consistency of ash. Lucidity stood at the edge and looked one way, then the other. Further down, she could see patches of dried grass and the trees, she realized, were not dormant, but dead. Recalling what had happened with Kagome, Lucidity rose into the air, rather than continue on foot, and drifted overhead. From here, she could see how far the discoloration stretched. More than half the village had been affected and it continued on into the forest. On closer inspection, she saw even more dead trees, their leaves slowly falling away and revealing the ashen trunks beneath. Without thought, a great gust of wind was brought through, enough to rattle the rooftops and uproot many of the weaker vegetation. The lingering leaves were sent scattering, not unlike the seeds of a dandelion, further and further into the forest, up the side of the mountain, daring to reach its very peak, and still the leaves fell, revealing the stark, poisonous truth beneath. 

Her body disappeared in a harsh whirlwind and she swept through the area, leaving the village far behind. For miles, she went, never touching the ground, a precaution that was more than necessary, when she came to realize the full impact of what she was seeing. Not only was the mountain of the village rotting, so was the next one, and the one after that. Every dip, every break in the range was just the same as before. Lucidity eventually stopped, more than satisfied with knowing that she was in the right place. But now, where did she go? Where did it start? What direction should she travel in?

Down? 

Her form solidified as she peered at the land directly below. With everything she'd seen, whether in person or a vision, beneath the ground was the most logical place to search. She wasn't keen on the idea, but reached for Hogosha nonetheless. The first clap of thunder echoed above her as the staff lengthened, soon followed by a second clap when she pointed the blade at the mountain. She looked up at the third and the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end. The clouds were rolling in a most unnatural speed, swirling as if a tornado was about to take shape at that very second. A streak of lightning darted between the gusting forms, the thunder growing louder, throbbing in her ears. She spun Hogosha up and turned her full attention to the coming storm that was, in no uncertain terms, putting her on edge. Seriously, what was going on here?!

Pain erupted around her ankle and the sickening familiarity of it could have wrenched a scream from her throat. As it was, she barely had time to gasp, let alone anything else as she was jerked right out of the air. Once again, she spun Hogosha in her hand and didn't even look at the tendril of blackness that the blade sliced through. The wind was still whistling in her ears as she slowed down, shaking the remnants of the blackness off her foot and watched the rest retreat back towards the earth. What the hell? Was that it? Shouldn't there be-?

The only reason Lucidity gasped this time was because the breath was knocked completely out of her lungs when something collided into her from behind, sending her hurtling out of the sky and into the side of the mountain. Her grip remained tight on Hogosha, but she had little control over anything else, and she quickly learned the hard way that, unlike the field Kagome had fallen through, the mountain was quite solid, not even close to hollow. Whether that was a blessing or not, since there was no river of blackness to greet her, she wasn't entirely positive on, because being buried beneath piles of stone and rock wasn't exactly pleasant either. Thunder clashed overhead, louder and more frequent than before and flashes of lightning could be spotted between the cracks of the rubble seconds before she used Hogosha to blast her way free. Yet the moment she was on her feet her and saw what was floating above her, she froze. Debris rained down between her and her assailant, but the view was thoroughly unobstructed. 

There was an ethereal quality to what was before her, even without the subtle, unnatural radiance to the body and hair. He was fair-skinned, like her, with half his pale gold hair pulled back in a tight ponytail, the rest hanging loose around his shoulders. His build was broad and well muscled, power in every vein, and his face a finely chiseled marble of pure masculinity. The armor he wore was a deeper gold than his hair and looked to be straight out of Greece, right down to the white cape billowing out behind him. When he smiled, a perfect string of pearly teeth could be seen. And those eyes...it was utterly surreal, looking into his eyes. There was nothing. No iris. No pupil. Completely white. He was...the most beautiful man she had ever seen. Fierce and beautiful, as though he was an archangel who had stepped right out of a grand painting of Heaven. 

The sight of him shook Lucidity to her core and she took an involuntary step back as he descended, to hover directly across from her, while the storm continued to stir around them. His aura...she could feel it. Or rather, what he allowed her to feel. She could sense the perfect control he had over his power, the ease in which he concealed himself. Even when he was right before her, it was like peering through a peephole to glimpse a raging flood that was miles in the distance. And then he spoke. She nearly jumped at the sound of his voice, smooth as silk in her ears, forming words in a language she was wholly unfamiliar with. Swallowing, she shook her head to show she didn't understand and he tilted his own, a small, quizzical smile playing on his lips. He spoke again, another language that was, again, completely unknown to her and, again, she shook her head, clutching Hogosha tight in front of her with both hands. Now, he laughed, head thrown back, arms folded across his chest, and she felt her heartbeat quicken. He started talking once more, a third language this time, and he didn't stop or even look at her; he seemed to be speaking to himself now, even when he finally did grace her with a smile that delighted in its mockery. 

"Who are you?" she finally asked, a bit surprised to find her own voice so steady when her heart was becoming very well acquainted with each of her ribs.

He laughed again and, quite suddenly, was directly in front of her. She barely had time to register her own shock at his speed when a hand closed over her throat and lifted her off the ground. She didn't so much as manage to raise Hogosha when his other hand caught her wrist and twisted so hard that she heard a crack that was most definitely not thunder, followed by a searing pain that raced through her arm. Whether she cried out or not, she didn't know and it didn't matter, as Hogosha slipped from her fingers and tumbled down the mountain, its form shrinking and soon disappearing into the endless of sea of rocks. 

"Sweet thing," he purred, ignoring her struggles as one would a child. "Such a shadow, you are." 

Lucidity never had a chance to respond. Not because she was dangling by her throat, but because he was dragging her forward and crushing his lips against hers. Her eyes flew wide and she did cry out this time, though the sound was weak and muffled. His mouth was like ash. She could taste the death in his kiss and had to swallow down the scream that threaten to rise beyond her control. Her wrist throbbed. Her mind was threatening to scatter. She kicked out, and yet she might as well be an insect kicking at a human. All he did was see fit to shove his tongue between her lips. It was cold, slimy, a far cry from what one would expect, and nearly caused her to gag. Instead, she did the next logical thing, which was to bite it clean off. And-HOLY FUCK! It was moving! The severed tongue was a fucking worm, squirming in her mouth! She coughed it up, practically retching in the process, and heard nothing but laughter in response. He spat a mouthful of blood over his shoulder, still laughing and smiling wide, those pearly whites stained red, then flung her so casually away. 

Before she landed on the ground, Lucidity dissolved her form and sped down the mountainside, not stopping until she spotted it, laying in a thicket of dead bushes. A corporeal hand-the one with the uninjured wrist-snatched up Hogosha and she started to rise, turning to face the assailant, only to freeze a second time. He was gone. Adrenaline racing, she peered around, but could see nothing but clouds, heard nothing but the storm and her own heavy panting. The edges of her mind were starting to fray. Panic was eating away at her and the only thought, the only impulse she had was to run. Run far, run fast, and never look back. After all...the Mother's mark had never stopped burning.

And neither had her ankle, it seemed. No, wait, that was her other ankle. Actually, as she twisted in the air, Hogosha flaring to life in her hand once more, she realized that both her ankles had been seized by the blackness. The tendrils had emerged, shooting up from the ground like grotesque sprouts. For whatever reason, it wasn't dragging her down this time, but quite effectively holding her in place. She turned Hogosha on it as fissures began to split the earth. More of the blackness rose, dancing and writhing, reaching for her like the arms of Hell seeking her embrace, and Hogosha's power burned beneath her fingers, the blade glowing-

A hand erupted through her stomach. 

The pain, the absolute pain that tore into her back and through her body left Lucidity paralyzed. She couldn't move, couldn't even scream, her frame trapped in an arch of agony, eyes wide open, head forced back, as droplets of rain began to sprinkle over her face. Another hand glided over her forehead, pushing her hair aside, and those white eyes met hers as the man-or whatever he was-leered down at her. 

"Tut, tut," he chuckled, his tongue whole and unblemished. "Bad girl. Do I have to break your other wrist? Mmm...though I do wonder if I broke your spine just now. Baby, move a bit higher. I want to see if she can feel anything down below; she won't be any fun if she can't." 

Mind spinning, Lucidity definitely felt the tendrils snake their way up her legs, sliding beneath the clothing, and groaned at the searing contact against her skin, bucking on reflex and trying to lift Hogosha...only to realize she was no longer holding it. When had-? 

"As I said," he whispered in her ear, "you are a shadow, a pale imitation of the true Guardian. You have no chance against me." And he brought his hand up, the one that she had believed was still touching her hair, and saw the sealed and harmless scythe clutched in his fingers. He tossed it aside, but she never saw where it fell, too busy crying out as he jerked his arm out of her body and gave another order to "Baby" to hold her. Once again, the blackness responded and soon her arms were drawn behind her back as that molten hot tar laced around her wrists, spreading toward her elbows. The smallest stroke of fortune, at least, was that it was on top of her sleeves, instead of in direct contact with her skin; her legs were still hurting something fierce. 

Yet burns were the least of her problems, as the stranger drifted around to face her. His smile was so serene, so stunning to look upon, and Lucidity's nerve threatened to shatter when his hand stretched towards her face. "No!" she shouted, jerking out of his reach. "Don't! Don't...you.... Who.... _What_ the hell are you?" 

He pulled his hand back, staring with his mouth wide open, and it would have been comical if Lucidity could remember what a sense of humor was. Right now, all she could feel was the terror gnawing at her gut and clogging her mind, making it impossible to focus. She had...she had an idea, a very vague idea, but there was little beyond a dull thought in the back of her mind that she had to stall him. For what purpose, she wasn't certain. Maybe so she could come up with an actual plan. But what?! Hogosha was gone. The blackness kept her body from shifting. And she was trying so desperately to call forth the energy she'd wielded before, which had ultimately saved her and Sesshomaru in that cavern weeks ago. Yet she couldn't feel so much as a twinge.

Why...? Why couldn't she free herself?! Why couldn't she find the strength to fight back? Or was he simply stronger, like the blackness? The blackness had held her before, beneath the water that day. She'd nearly drowned. It wasn't until Sesshomaru had been forced to join her, when he had almost succumbed to the same fate, that she'd been able to free them both. And that... _that_ was the variable! If she could just focus, if she could just remember the reason she came here, to risk life and limb and-

"This is what the bitch goddess sends me?!" the stranger roared suddenly, guffawing with such delight that it was a moment or so before he continued. "Two centuries I've been preparing for this playtime and some ignorant whore is my opponent? O, but, I don't mind, really. You are something new and I do enjoy anything that is new. So, what do you say? Would you like to have fun with me?"

"No fucking way in hell!" she yelled, hardly able to hear her own voice from the pounding heartbeat in her ears; and then there was the thunder, booming overhead, seemingly echoing her own torrent of emotions. "You're crazy. You-AH!" Her words broke off in a sharp gasp when the blackness unexpectedly slid higher up her leg and pushed between her thighs. She gave a wordless shout, writhing, both from the pain in such a tender area and the realization of where that damn thing was trying to reach. 

"No, Baby, not yet! Wait your turn. There's my girl. Come on." 

It was as if he was speaking to a pet. The tendril disappeared from Lucidity's leg, settling around her ankles, but it was horrifying to watch that thing brush up against the man's cheek as though greeting an old friend. And worse still was seeing him nuzzle it and coo.

"Yes, yes. I know she hurt you," he continued. "Be patient. Remember that I've been waiting a lot longer than you. Such a pretty thing you are, Baby. Be good for me now and wait until I'm done with her." 

Lucidity's mind was spinning so fast that she was starting to feel disoriented. It would take a fool not to understand what this man intended, but she never would have expected it, not from this one. Death, destruction, carnage, perhaps, yet forcing himself onto a Guardian, even a pale imitation, never crossed her mind. "You...you're really the rising power," she muttered vaguely as the full comprehension finally dawned on her. "You created the blackness, sent it out...." 

"Oh? Is that what you're calling me?" he chuckled. "And 'blackness' for my Baby? How original. Well, I suppose it's fitting. She did help me with the Plague, the Black Death, as those humans called it. As you have seen for yourself, we've greatly improved since then. I have always believed that it's not the numbers that matter, but the execution of the act. Of course, I do hope to get those numbers up, maybe even create a new record. You had so many dead to eat in the north, didn't you, Baby?" he added, rubbing his cheek against the blackness. "We kept you so well fed then. You were so strong. And we'll make you much stronger this time, so this mean old Guardian can't hurt you again." 

The bile of fear rose in the back of Lucidity's throat, just as he backhanded her across the face, jerking her head to the side. Lips pursed tight, she tried to refrain from making a sound, not even when he wrenched her head back by the hair and seized her chin hard enough to make her wince. 

"Bitch!" he hissed. "I will be your death if you touch Baby again. She returned to me so badly injured that she's been cooped up for weeks trying to recover. She's been having her fun now; she's so much stronger when she is with me. No more holding back, we've decided. We had to draw you out somehow, since you were hiding out at that pesky Isle of yours. Cowardly cunt!" He spat at her and nearly snapped her jaw with the pressure of his hand when she tried to turn away. A grunt escaped her and that had him smiling, the anger melting as though it had never existed. "Baby tells me she got a good taste of your pet, the one that killed the little gift I sent you. One of those local youkai, yes? They're so versatile when it comes to Baby's touch; they last much longer than humans. Tell me: does he still live?" 

Lucidity clenched her teeth together, very much unwilling to answer anything of the sort, and cast her thoughts wildly around, trying to find something, anything that might distract him. The rain was coming in earnest now. No longer droplets, but a torrential downpour that soaked her to the bone. Gods be damned, she had to think! She had to come up with a better plan, or rather an actual fucking plan already! However, she did manage to focus on one particular detail that confused her. "Little...gift?" she repeated. "What are you talking about?"

"The Nemean Lion!" he said, in a tone which suggested that the answer should have been the most obvious thing in the world. "Did you believe it just happened to crawl out of the ground because it felt like it? I grabbed him in Greece about...hmm.... You know what? I don't remember how many centuries it's been." The man chuckled once more. "That creature was in my domain for so long that I forgot all about it, until I decided to see for myself what the Lady out of Time was like in the heat of battle." Snickering, he pulled her closer, forcing her neck to crane until she winced again. "Worldly knowledge aside, you were and still are very pathetic, Lucidity." 

The alarm that gripped her nearly tore a scream from her throat. He laughed, no doubt at the shock etched upon her face, at how her mouth hung open, which was a terrible mistake on her part. Everything that had brought her here was a mistake. She was alone and injured and at the mercy of someone...something that would not kill her swiftly. No, not swiftly at all. She knew he meant to torture her, as surely as he meant to force himself onto her, if that tongue being shoved into her throat was any indication. She didn't bite down this time. Despite how she trembled, she couldn't bring herself to lash out, to make any sort of bid for freedom. She was too...too fucking afraid! Gods, she was downright terrified, right to the very core of her being! She would rather be crushed to death by a thousand trees than endure another second with this monster! 

A soft moan echoed against her mouth and she couldn't stop herself from struggling. Yet beyond arching her back and nearly twisting her neck around, both he and the blackness held fast to her. His hand came to her throat and his fingers steadily began to tighten as he drew back and beamed down at her, those white eyes shimmering with such fevered delight. "Should you remain conscious," he murmured, "you may call me Morstua. And I am the Prince of Death to your Guardian of Life." He nuzzled her cheek, just as he had done to the blackness, and promptly squeezed her throat the moment she tried to squirm free. Spots started to prance across her vision, but she could still hear his voice, clear as day. "Half Guardian, I should say. Yet half is better than none. I think I will keep you for myself, my brothers be damned; they can find their own. You're an exquisite thing, so unique among your siblings, the South included. O, but, do you scream? One of those luscious, high melodies? Wait, don't say a word. I wish to find out for myself."

And suddenly, she could breathe again. She took great gulps of air, only to bite down on her cries as he shoved his hand beneath her clothes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I mention there was going to be some more violence? Pretty sure I did. And cliffhangers. Those are my favorite implements of torture!
> 
> I'm still working on the next few chapters. I hope to crank this thing out and give it a proper ending. I'll admit, guys, that it's been difficult. Dealing with some writer's block in some areas, but I'm working through it. Haven't had much time or energy as of late and with the holidays this week I don't know how much of a chance I will have to write. I will make the effort, though! 
> 
> And an early Happy Thanksgiving to USA readers!


	46. Chapter 46

"You're so warm inside." 

Lucidity, her eyes screwed shut, felt the hard pelt of rain against her upturned face. Every inch of her skin was crawling. If she was so inclined, she would have vomited on the spot, preferably on him, perhaps disgusting him to the point where he would kill her rather than touch her. That would be better, wouldn't it? Yes, she did find that outcome more appealing than what he had planned. Keep her, he had said. She didn't have to stretch her imagination to know the reason he wanted to keep her.

"So wet, too," he whispered into her ear, causing her to shudder and turn her head away. "Mmm, how delicious you are! Your fear is sweeter than blood. Yet you make no sounds. Why not? Do you refuse due to some delusion of your dignity? I can strip that from you, you know? I can make you forget that you once possessed any measure of pride or that you were strong or powerful, at least in your own dismal world. How does that sound to you, little Guardian? Come now, answer me, or I shall become cross. Right now my mood is pleasant. Would you like to know what will happen should that change?" 

She swallowed and barely managed to mutter, "I don't...care for the idea." She heard a low chuckle in response as he pressed against her and she forced herself not to recoil, not to respond. Had to think...had to keep her mind clear...had to remember...how to break free. 

"Whore you might be, I shall make you mine. You would be a most valuable asset," he purred, brushing his cheek against hers. "Just imagine what might come of our union, the offspring you would bear for me. Lifetimes beyond the counting since we have taken physical bodies and yet never had such a notion occurred to any of us. I do wish I could lay claim to the idea, but alas it was not mine. I intend to build upon it, though, and have you bear me an army. How fertile are you?" 

No...no, she most definitely did not want to imagine any of that! She shook her head, wildly so, eyes still shut, and feeling beyond sick to her stomach. She didn't want to hear what he was saying, didn't want to think on it, didn't want to picture the torment of such an existence, of being locked away in some dark castle of the Underworld, chained and bred like a feral animal, used for his sadistic pleasure. And brothers? He did mention brothers. If he tired of her, what would stop him from giving her to them for the same purpose and-

Fuck! What was she doing?! She couldn't let her thoughts get away from her like that. She had to focus! Son of a bitch! She needed to get the hell out of here! 

Morstua pushed deeper inside her, so hard and so sudden that she cried out in spite of every ounce of effort she had put in to staying silent. His laughter was starting to make her temple throb and she wondered if he would be kind enough to puncture both of her eardrums so she wouldn't have to listen to him from now on. Yet, she was highly doubtful of that possibility; he apparently loved to hear himself talk. 

"When I ask you a question, you will answer me, little whore," he said, practically sang. "Though I do love your voice. Do it again. Here, shall I help?"

And he moved again, twisting the hand inside her gut and her eyes flew open at the pain. Blood was leaking down his arm, dripping from his elbow, and, yes, she did scream this time, with his fingers digging into her organs and tearing through them one by one. She couldn't stop shaking and knew that groans were falling from her lips, while the storm howled its fury, drenching them both. And she could feel her eyes burning, yet had no idea if she was weeping. She very well could be, considering that he was now moving his hand upward, pushing at other organs. Liver, perhaps, or maybe kidneys? She couldn't be certain; she'd never enjoyed learning about human anatomy, but had a sinking realization that she was about to become very intimate with that knowledge.

"Yes, yes, that's it," came the throaty voice in her ear. "You make such wonderful sounds. Now answer me, whore." 

Hanging in midair, still caught in the grasp of the blackness, with this Prince of Death playing doctor in his version of foreplay, Lucidity could think of only one thing to say: "I'm not a whore!" 

A hand fisted into her hair as he pushed his mouth against hers, thrusting his tongue inside again. And yet he jerked back almost at once, yanked the hand from her body, and slapped her across the face, letting her own blood mar her cheek until the rain washed it away. "Don't lie to me, girl!" he shouted, an ugly scowl on his lips, a sight she could barely focus on, mind spinning as it was from the never ending fear and pain. "You reek of daemon and only the lowest of animals would ever bed a daemon," he continued. "You should be honored that I would even convey interest in you, knowing this. But I will erase his influence from your body and mind until you forget whatever madness drove you to spread your legs for the beast, starting with this."

And his hand moved from her hair to clutch the back of her neck, nails digging into the mark, Sesshomaru's mark, and her response was immediate. "No!" she cried. "Don't touch me. Stop fucking touching me!" 

A broad grin spread across Morstua's face. "Ah, so you do have some spirit after all. Excellent, excellent. I hope you are a challenge. The body is a simple thing to break, as you can see for yourself, but the spirit is another matter entirely. How long will you be able to hold out, I wonder. And what shall I do to you first? Or...perhaps I'm going about this the wrong way. Your response to the youkai brand makes it obvious that it is important to you, which means the one who left the mark is important. We should start with him. Yes, what a wonderful idea! I will take him and anyone else you hold dear in this world and feed every last one to Baby, so that you have only me to provide you company in the end. So, tell me, who marked you? It was that pet of yours, wasn't it? The mark tastes like him. Ugh! How revolting that you'd permit a mutt to touch you. Shall we go find him together? I want you to witness his demise and see for yourself what it means to cross me."

"NO!" Lucidity shouted. That was...that entirely defeated the purpose in her coming here! She was putting everything on the line to keep Sesshomaru safe. To keep everyone safe! And now the evil wanted to hurt them just to spite her!

Morstua smiled at her, still gripping her by the neck. "Yes," he said. "I believe that is exactly what I'll do. That disgusting mongrel is precious to you and I will have fun tearing him apart."

Her voice came out a trembling whisper. "You won't...you can't...."

"He needs to pay," Morstua continued as if he had never heard her. "Being the stupid, ignorant mortal that he is. How dare he believe he has any right to a Guardian, even a half-breed like you. I think I might keep him for a few days. He's a pompous little mutt, but handsome from what I remember and it has been a while since I've indulged in a male."

Her breathing quickened. She couldn't.... She wouldn't let that happen. She had to...had to find a way....

"Perhaps he will better serve in my domain. I can place him in stasis when I am not playing with him; it will prolong his life. What do you think? Is he the type to break? To forget who he is? I should make a project out of him and see how long it will take until he licks my boot and thanks me for the pain I give him. Mmm, what a delightful thought. And in the meantime, I will breed you, my little bitch, to my heart's content. Here now, are you shaking? Are you so afraid? How pathetic. You face a true threat and buckle under pressure. How can you call yourself a protector of balance when you can't even protect yourself?" 

And she felt his hand on her stomach, his fingers dancing around the gaping wound beneath the clothes he had so easily torn through. Thunder clashed overhead as his laughter rang in her ears and lightning illuminated his radiant countenance. So beautiful, he was, and terrifying in his cruelty. He was beyond this world, beyond her understanding, and yet...he was no different. No different from the others she had come across, from the men who had attempted to assault her during the festival or the bandits she'd killed while saving Jaken. No different from any other person who'd meant harm to her and those she cared about. He frightened her. Beyond anything else she had ever encountered, she feared him the most, feared what he would do. But...there was one thing she feared above all other measures.

"I won't...." she whispered, fine tremors echoing throughout her body.

"What was that? Speak up when you answer me," said Morstua, his finger digging into the injury.

Her teeth clenched at the discomfort, heart pounding, but the pain was dull compared to the memory of his touch. The silver crown of hair, the scent of him, his body, his face. She remembered it all, brighter and more powerful than anything this Prince of Death might conjure. She remembered the reason why she came out here, the reason why she risked everything, risked her own life, because she could not risk him. She would not! Morstua would not touch him! Not any of them!

"I-WILL-NOT-LET-YOU!!" Lucidity screamed, and her power erupted in a burst of light that seared even her own eyes.

From a distance, she could hear more screams resonating. The hand on her stomach could no longer be felt and the burning pressure around her ankles and arms vanished. Morstua was shouting, calling out for "Baby" again and again, and still the power scorched the air around her. Lucidity could not tell up from down, left from right, where she ended and the energy began. As she had done before, she succumbed to the onslaught and did not resist as she was pulled apart and lost all sense of self, of what and who she was. There was nothing but the energy, without focus, raging out of control as surely as a forest fire. And yet the simplicity of flames could not begin to compare to the destruction left in the wake of what she had done.

The stretch of mountain below was half destroyed, the peak of it completely disintegrated, and a crater was all that remained. It dwarfed the one back on the Isle. In fact, she was quite certain that very little of the Isle would be left if she had released such a magnitude of energy. Drifting above and panting from the exertion it had taken, she could see Morstua kneeling in the center, digging through what little rubble there was, like a child searching for a toy in the sandbox. Except there was no sandbox, but rather a smoking area of terrain where nothing lived.

"What has she done to you?!" he was lamenting. "Baby? Baby, did you get away? Answer me! Please, Baby! Where are you?!"

Morstua was so beautiful, so surreal; however, there was something decidedly...pitiful about him. He put forth so much effort and the result were just...laughable. She seemed to feel like he had always been as such, little more than a nuisance when he decided to pop up and play. Now and then perhaps he misbehaved more than usual; yet compared to his brothers, he was hardly worth the time or attention it took to deal with him. And yet...he was still dangerous to those who were weaker than him and that list was sadly much, much longer than the list of those who were more powerful than him.

"YOU FUCKING BITCH! I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!"

And Lucidity was definitely on the former list.

He was hurtling through the air towards her, cape billowing out behind him, looking not unlike a winged angel soaring for the heavens, his form distorted by the mist of the endless rain. His wrath could be felt on the winds, his aura expanding as his control slipped. The press of it was near suffocating, enough that it deafened her to all other sounds and sensations. She could barely hear the roar of the storm or the water soaking through her. Her own power, however, crackled in response, as though she had never strained to remember how it had been called forth in the first place. As simple as exhaling, she felt it dance between her fingers and braced herself, readying for impact, because this had to be done. She had to stop him, or else-

The attack came without warning.

A giant wave cut between Lucidity and Morstua, a shimmer of emerald that was unmistakable, though she had seen it only once before. The dread that dropped into the pit of her stomach was cold and heavy and she hung there in the air, limp with shock, while Morstua turned towards his assailant, face filled with unchecked rage, and was met with a full blast from Bakusaiga. His screams rang in her ears as his body was lost from sight. But his aura...she could still feel his aura.

"No...." she whispered, her gaze starting to drift, trying to find the source of the attack.

"Oi! Lucidity!"

Lucidity peered through the rain at the red cladded figured bearing a young woman, standing at the edge of the crater, and the two-headed dragon beside them, with its burden of humans and imp.

"NO!"

The word tore from her, as unbidden as their arrival. She descended swiftly, keeping her distance, as if the further apart they were from her, the safer they would somehow be. "No, no, no!" she shouted. "What are you doing here?! You need to leave, all of you!"

"That ain't happening," said Inuyasha while Kagome clambered onto her feet.

"I can't believe you took off like that," Sango said, dressed in full gear with Hiraikotsu gripped in one hand behind her shoulder, as she and her husband dismounted from Ah-Un.

"That was kind of the point!" Lucidity snapped. "It's too dangerous! I didn't want any of you-"

"We're here, so you better fucking deal with it," Inuyasha interrupted.

"It wasn't easy either," said Sango, in a tone which clearly suggested that Lucidity needed to appreciate all the trouble they had gone through. "The speed in which you travel is amazing."

"If you hadn't stopped to help so many people, we would never have caught up," said Miroku.

"Then next time I'll let them all die!" she damn near screeched. All that planning, all the effort, a complete waste!

Kagome gave a little smile as she lifted the bow from across her back. "You would never do that."

"If it meant-"

"You have a lot to answer for, you stupid woman!" Jaken had joined the foray, running out to stand in front of the humans and hanyou, as always brandishing the Staff of Two Heads whenever he was in a bad mood, a constant reminder that he could fry whoever was annoying him to a crisp. "You should be grateful that we came all the way out here after your deception. Not even Rusuban agreed with your decision. If it wasn't for her, we never would have found you and Sesshomaru-sama has been...has been...."

Slowly, Jaken's voice trickled away into nothing and his body stiffened, arms holding the Staff aloft, his mouth open and expression frozen, looking as though he might continue his tirade at any second. Lucidity was not surprised that he could be gripped by fear so unexpectedly that he was the epitome of a living statue; yet why the others would be filled with the same tension, she didn't know. Huddled together, every pair of eyes was following the progress of something descending, at great speed it seemed, and soon the sound of rapidly approaching footsteps reached her ears. Beneath the lingering tumult of Morstua's aura, she could feel another, growing stronger with each heartbeat, until her hair stood on end and she finally turned around, not the least bit surprised at what she saw.

What did surprise her was the sight of the daiyoukai fully decked out in armor and spiked pauldron; she felt the strangest sense that the image was complete again after all this time. Oh, and she also felt the hard blow across the face that knocked her flat on her back, which might have been even more of a surprise. Yet for all the aches and pains she was currently enduring, this was perhaps the easiest to deal with; however, staring up at the daiyoukai who towered over her, his expression darkened with a simmering rage, was the sour icing on the spoiled, rotten cake. At least, if he was here assaulting her, that meant that Morstua was taken care of, right? Temporarily perhaps?

Thunder clamored overhead and nearly drowned out the voice of someone shouting, "Sesshomaru! I know she made a mistake, but you shouldn't hit women like that!"

"It's fine, Kagome!" Lucidity called out, pushing herself up, and rubbed at her very much aching cheek. Her gaze never left Sesshomaru, who narrowed his eyes, the corners of his mouth twisting down. "I...may have deserved that."

"Indeed," he replied. "Your insolence knows no bounds; you betrayed me."

Lucidity swallowed before a heavy sigh broke from her. "Yeah, I suppose I did."

"You saw fit to incapacitate me and anyone else who stood in the way of your plans, giving no consideration to those consequences."

"Yes," she replied without the least bit of hesitation.

"You did not believe you would survive the encounter with the rising power, but still deemed it necessary to confront it on your own."

"Yes."

"And you would do so again?"

"In a heartbeat."

Sesshomaru let out a hard breath through his nose and stepped closer, so that Lucidity had to crane her head back the better to look at him. It occurred to her then that this bad mood of his had persisted for days. That must have been what Jaken was about to mention. And considering how hesitant the others were-even Inuyasha, who was usually the first to tell Sesshomaru to back off-she was surprised that she hadn't received more than a mere punch to the face. What she'd done, how she'd beat him, after what he had declared...that part she regretted even if her actions had been to protect him. Of course, he wouldn't see it that way. She'd be a complete moron to think otherwise. He'd believe she saw him as weak and incapable of handling the blackness, as much of a hindrance as his half-breed brother. He was far from that, though. With his bearing down on her, the anger so deeply seated in his gaze, she wanted to do nothing more than spring to her feet and go to him. She could still feel Morstua's hands on her. Her body was still hurting, the pain an ever constant and sharp reminder of what he had done in so brief an encounter. And the memory of what he had intended to do continued to make her sick to...whatever remained of her stomach. 

A hand stretched out towards her, the fingers long and tapered with claws, the wrist bearing familiar stripes she had taken to tracing more than once in recent days. She studied the pale lines in the palm, the droplets of rain splattering down, and the faint glimpse of veins beneath the thin layer of skin before her eyes trailed up the arm and to his face. The anger was gone, replaced with a placid indifference and an air of patience that held far more reassurance than any bone crushing hug ever could. In fact, as she reached up and felt his fingers enclose her hand, this simple gesture was the only one was necessary. A word, an embrace, was moot at this point as he brought her to her feet, his grip firm; apparently, he wasn't going to let her go, not even with the others observing like silent sentinels in the background.

"Next time," he suddenly said in a soft voice nearly lost in cacophony of the howling storm, "you will choose a more suitable way to show your affections."

Lucidity blinked, her lips parting, but no sound was forthcoming. In the distance, she could hear the murmur of voices. Sango and Kagome were talking, but their words were distorted by the fresh torrent of water being deluged from the thick clouds above. The deeper tones of the men punctuated the conversation here and there, but for the most part, Lucidity ignored what they were discussing. "Sesshomaru...." she began and yet had no clue what to say after that. She could not apologize and be sincere, not when they both knew she would make the same decision without hesitation.

"You're hurt," he said without warning, and the words stirred a vague memory in the back of her mind, of a time that was similar and yet so very different.

"I...." she started, but his hand was already drawing the sleeve back on her arm, inspecting the burns from the blackness. And when his fingers moved over her wrist, she couldn't stop herself from grimacing. 

"It's broken," he stated. 

"I know."

"You were very foolish to come here alone," he said. "The rain does little to mask the scent of your blood. How much of it has been spilled?" 

"...enough." 

For a moment, he did not react, merely stared at her for a heartbeat or two, and then his eyes drifted down as he moved closer, blocking her from view of the others. She didn't follow the movement of his hand, but could feel the brush of fingers beneath the damaged tunic, the press of his palm against the torn flesh, and she stiffened at the pain, gritting her teeth, as he inspected the wound. She watched him in silence as he withdrew his hand and brought it up. His frown was thin as he considered the thick coat of blood that was running down his arm in rivulets, gradually being washed away by rainwater.

"Had he struck higher, it would have been fatal," Sesshomaru said, flexing his fingers, almost in afterthought. 

"He...wasn't trying to kill me, not at first," Lucidity murmured and nearly flinched at the sharp glare from the daiyoukai. 

As the last of the blood disappeared with the water, Sesshomaru lowered his arm and she did not miss how his hand tightened into a fist. "Then he was undeserving of a quick and painless death."

She bit down on her lip. "Are you sure he's dead? He's very adapt at masking his aura."

"Nothing can survive a direct blast from Bakusaiga," spat a new voice, and they both looked around at the hanyou striding toward them. "Was that really the big evil that was brewing and had everyone afraid? After all the hype, I was hoping for a bit of a challenge. Well, you might have had your ass handed to you, Lucidity, but I told you before that you seriously suck at fighting." Without warning, he thrust a fist out, only to stop short of actually hitting her. She stepped closer and saw that he held something small, thin, and white in his hand. She stared at Hogosha and wondered if it was true. Was she so terrible in combat? Had she simply been weak minded? Crippled with fear and unable to properly battle Morstua, not because he was stronger, but because she had planted too many seeds of doubt in herself? She gazed at the sealed weapon, lost in thought for so long that Inuyasha eventually yelled, "Ain't this yours?! Fucking take it already!"

She took it and was promptly struck upside the head hard enough that she let out a yelp-whether from pain or surprise, she wasn't sure-and dropped Hogosha in the process of covering her head from any further blows. Honestly, how many times was this going to happen today?!

"Idiot!" Inuyasha shouted. "That was for making us chase your sorry carcass all the way here! You're lucky that-"

Why he didn't see it coming was anyone's guess. Even Lucidity could have predicted the reaction, though she looked up only when she felt a rush of movement, heard the impact, and saw a pair of bare feet disappearing down the slope of the crater, along with the rest of Inuyasha. Kagome, Sango, Miroku, and Jaken remained on the sidelines, each with similar wariness about their expressions, while Ah-Un shook his heads and surveyed the whole scene with idle interest. Sesshomaru stood between Lucidity and Inuyasha, his face blank as he gazed down at his brother, who had managed to stop his descent down what remained of the mountain and was scrambling upright, a heavy scowl on his lips. 

"You overstep, hanyou," said Sesshomaru.

"Fuck you, asshole," Inuyasha sneered, wiping a trail of blood from the corner of his mouth. "She had it coming and you know it. If she wasn't already bloodied and bruised, I'd do that, too."

"Inuyasha-" Kagome began, only for Sesshomaru to cut across her. 

"The promise to send you to an early grave remains, Inuyasha," he said, taking a step towards his brother. "She isn't yours to discipline." 

Lucidity felt a muscle twitch somewhere near her eye. Discipline? He made her sound like a child! Resisting the urge to grumble some very colorful words, she carefully lowered herself to a knee and picked up Hogosha. This wasn't the time to argue. That is, she really wasn't up for it. Let the dogs snap and snarl at each other. As she rose to her feet, sliding Hogosha back into its leather pouch, she peered over at the cluster of humans and imp, who were watching the little family spat. Sango caught her eye and nodded her head towards the brothers, managing a slight, amused smile, which Lucidity had trouble returning. 

"You're the one who is responsible for her, right? Wasn't that the reason why you were given the fancy title of Protector by that goddess?" Inuyasha was saying. "Why don't you do a better job of actually protecting her, instead of having us search all over the countryside because you failed at-"  

Lucidity must have blinked, because she didn't remember Sesshomaru moving. Yet he had just the same. In less than a second, he'd closed the distance between himself and Inuyasha to seize the other by the throat and lift him clear off his feet. There was an outcry from the group once they realized what was going on while Inuyasha dug his claws into Sesshomaru's arm, his face turning a brilliant shade of red. 

"Do not concern yourself with what is mine, hanyou," said the youkai lord in a voice cold enough to chill a person to the bone. "Your focus should remain on more important matters, such as keeping yourself alive. If you speak out of turn again, I will end your wretched existence." And, without another word, he tossed Inuyasha unceremoniously to the ground, where he landed with a grunt in front of the others. 

Lucidity stood off to the side in silent astonishment. Her heart was beating a fierce rhythm against her ribcage as she pushed the wet hair from her face, staring at Sesshomaru when he turned from his brother. Everyone knew about her and Sesshomaru. It wasn't a secret. And yet no one spoke of it aloud; it was simply an acknowledged fact of life. Yet Sesshomaru had. In his own possessive way, he'd verbally claimed her in front of everyone, something she never expected to happen. On reflex, a hand went to the back of her neck and she touched the outline of the scars, tracing the patterns that were not wholly familiar to her yet. His gaze followed her movements as he approached.

"Come," he said without breaking stride. "I would have us leave this place." 

She could only lower her arm and nod. Even though she'd betrayed his trust, even though she had deceived and managed to overpower him in a fight, his fury had been nullified. He didn't hate her. He'd already forgiven her, in fact. And Inuyasha might be angry now, perhaps everyone else still was, but it would be fine. In the end, everything would be-

In a deafening explosion that could shatter bones to dust, the earth erupted in a shower of rocks and blood and screams. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How is everyone liking/hating Morstua? I personally wouldn't want to have playtime with the little fucker. He very much needs to die. Painfully. Ah, if only!


	47. Chapter 47

Lightning darted between the clouds and rent the air with the smell of ozone. The storm continued without pause, indifferent to what lay below, the precarious balance in which this world existed teetering upon the brink. What did it matter to the sky that the land beneath it was in turmoil? What difference did it make for this person to live or that person to die? On the grand whole, a single human life made no difference. Where the universe was concerned, the loss of an entire planet caused nary a ripple. So why scream? Why weep? Why hurt? Why should one put forth the effort to give a damn at all? In the end, there was no guarantee that one would learn any master plan or an explanation for the purpose of existence. 

Lucidity had come to realize that the people who said there was no point to life after coming to such conclusions were complete and total idiots. Life was wasted on those people. Even when she was frightened, when she had little hope, when the future seemed so bleak and desolate, she would not have it end. Death was the only guarantee and there was no telling when it would come. And that was what made living, to her, all the more precious, because being here and now was absolute. This self-awareness the only known truth to be had. Life was everything in her eyes and that was the reason she gave a damn, the reason she hurt, and the reason she would eventually weep. 

But she could not weep. She could not understand. There were no tears to be found as she gaped at the wreckage. The ground had been split open, dead trees uprooted, when the blackness had spilled out and scattered their groups. Its tendrils swayed high above them, churning in the rain like some tentacled monster from the depths of the ocean. It didn't attack, simply weaved back and forth, mocking in a way, as though enjoying the view of the aftermath. Lucidity's gaze drifted from the blackness to the humans and hanyou. The thunder could not drown out the sounds of weeping, the near hysteria of Kagome's voice, while Inuyasha stood beside her where she knelt, Tessaiga in hand and completely useless in protecting her from what lay before. He could not quite overcome his shock, it seemed, for all he could do was stare down at Miroku, who knelt with Sango in his arms. Her eyes were shut and her head rested against his shoulder. Miroku, too, was beyond words, beyond any type of reaction. Kagome wept for each of them, because not even Lucidity could accept the truth of what was she seeing. There was nothing but the cold shock of denial as she stared at Sango and the bleeding hole in her chest where the blackness had pierced through.

Lucidity wasn't conscious of the decision to move forward. She was barely aware of Jaken and Ah-Un standing beside her or the hand that caught her by the arm. It wasn't until her progress was impeded and she couldn't take another step that she stopped and peered back at the pale fingers holding her tight, such a stark contrast to the darkness of her attire; she'd never noticed before. Her eyes traveled upward to his face, ever perfect and stoic. He didn't feel. Yet...neither did she, not the way she was supposed to. Right then, she couldn't. It would cost her, somehow, if she tried. 

"Regain your focus," Sesshomaru said. "There is still danger here." 

That was right. He'd pulled her out of harm's way. She glanced at the blackness, then back at him before she eventually muttered, "But...Sango. I have to-" 

"She's dead," was the flat response. "There is nothing you can do." 

Dead...? Sango was dead? She hadn't escaped in time. She hadn't been quick enough. None of them had been quick enough. Yet if Lucidity could just get to her friend, then she could make it right. Somehow she could fix it because Sango couldn't be dead! She couldn't stay dead! There was something they had that could reverse it. They just had to react faster! Lucidity opened her mouth, needing to convey this to Sesshomaru, when something beneath her feet shook. An arm of steel seized her around the waist and she was lifted away in a haze of confusion and rain, thunder echoing in her ears and lightning illuminating those down below. Jaken was taking off on Ah-Un. Inuyasha had Kagome on his back and had started bounding to safety, only to stop suddenly and turn back. Lucidity could see their mouths moving, hear shouting as their attention shifted from the ground that was crumbling apart. 

"Miroku, look out!" 

"Come on already! You need to move! You need to get out of there!" 

Yet the monk didn't respond. Even as the blackness slithered out of the crevices and began to cover the land, inching closer and closer, Miroku's quiet countenance never broke. He eased the hair from Sango's face and gathered her to him, his head bent low over hers. The blackness reared up in front of him, a single tendril, like a snake searching for the opportune moment to strike. 

"Sesshomaru, let me go! Let go!" Lucidity shouted as a surge of panic gripped her and she began to struggle against the arm holding her aching midriff. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Kagome draw an arrow and bring it to her bow. "Sesshomaru! He's going to-" 

"It is his choice," the daiyoukai whispered. 

Lucidity didn't know if she screamed or not. There was a chance she might have said something. Her throat was raw and she remembered producing a sound. All she knew for certain was that Kagome had released the arrow right when the blackness burst out of Miroku's back. Such a beautiful arc his body made with his head thrown back, perhaps in agony, unless the surprise in his face suggested otherwise. Yet he'd known it was coming and hadn't given any thought to escape. His attention was for his wife alone and Lucidity did not have to imagine the turmoil of pain that would make it so easy for him to choose to stay by her side. A coldness spread through her chest as she watched his expression fade and the glow in his eyes dim before his arms loosened their grip on Sango and he slumped forward. Someone was screaming again. Weeping and screaming and she could not make it stop.

"Lucidity?"

The sound of her name had the woman glancing up at Sesshomaru, wondering what he could possibly be asking now, but found that he wasn't even looking at her. His gaze was on a spot just beyond Miroku and she followed his line of sight to see...a hand. A pale hand was stretching out of the blackness, clutching something tight in its grasp, and rising higher, revealing an elbow, a bicep, and eventually a shoulder. A head of golden hair soon followed, loose and flowing, and then a bare chest and stomach, thighs and calves. He was without clothing and without shame as he peered around at the assembled cluster of humans, youkai, and one would-be Guardian. A thin smile spread across his lips and he snapped Kagome's arrow in half before tossing the pieces aside; Lucidity had forgotten all about the damn arrow.

"That was an adorable attempt, sweet thing," Morstua said. "But as you can see, it was futile; my perfect Baby escaped! And that sword! What an intriguing ability it has. My body has not taken this long to recover for some time. Oh, but that aura of yours," he added, glancing at Sesshomaru. "Are you the dog who bit my intended?"

"You're intended?!" came the abrupt outburst from Jaken as he floated nearby on Ah-Un. "How dare you! She does not belong to you, you imbecile! Who do you think you are?!" 

Morstua's string of perfect teeth glistened as he gave a broad smile. "Your death, little daemon," he chuckled softly, eyes glittering with excitement, before he peered over at Kagome and Inuyasha, both of whom had their weapons drawn, and then to Sango and Miroku. "The death of every last one of you." And he threw his head back and laughed, loud, voracious laughter that split the ears and sent a sickening shiver down Lucidity's spine. 

"You son of a bitch!" 

Inuyasha's cry of rage was immediately followed by the hanyou himself pelting forward, Tessaiga rearing back and slashing furiously at Morstua, who darted out of reach and never stopped laughing. Even as Inuyasha came at him again and again, he merely spun this way and that, a seemingly permanent smirk plastered on his face, like he was indulging his opponent in this little act of battle, while Inuyasha relentlessly pressed him, moving further and further from the group. 

"Everyone, stay back!" Inuyasha shouted as he lifted Tessaiga once more. 

The blade was darkening and Lucidity saw something akin to the night sky forming along the length of it before a movement out of the corner of her eye grabbed her attention. Her heart leapt into her throat when she caught the last glimpse of Miroku and Sango disappearing beneath the blackness. With a jolt, she remembered what Morstua had said about the blackness eating the dead and was just about to renew her struggles against the hard grip Sesshomaru still kept on her when a bright streak of energy tore across the dark matter that threatened to consume their friends. And there came that bodiless wail of agony, the same as what she had heard before. The blackness retreated, writhing and trembling, under the power of Kagome's arrow. 

In the distance, she heard an exclamation of anger, the unmistakable voice of Morstua, cursing and yelling, calling for his Baby, and Inuyasha was saying something in return. Perhaps a taunt or a threat. Lucidity didn't much care for what words were being exchanged as she watched Kagome run forward and drop down beside the prone figures of a husband and wife. The blackness was still nearby, collecting itself as its ashen wounds slowly healed over, and there was no one else down there with Kagome. 

"Your injuries are too extensive," Sesshomaru said the moment Lucidity began to strain against him. "Your survival is questionable should you fight again." 

"Is it not my choice as it was Miroku's?!" she spat and, in the same breath, dissolved her form. _Why_ hadn't she done that before to save that damn monk?! Were her panic and fear so great that she'd managed to forget the ability? These thoughts spun through her head as she landed beside Kagome, who peered up at her with heavy tears in her eyes that could not be hidden by the rain, bow and arrow still in hand. There was nothing Lucidity could offer but the silent understanding of grief as she crouched down beside the priestess. Behind them, Sesshomaru descended, soon followed by Jaken on Ah-Un. 

"What are we going to do?" Kagome whispered, turning her gaze towards Inuyasha and Morstua, who were dancing their lethal dance. "He's so powerful. Not even the Meido Zangetsuha has any effect on him."

Lucidity frowned at the large, crescent shape patches that were filling the sky, the same shimmering black as the Tessaiga, and saw the nude and vibrant figure of Morstua standing in their midst, paying no heed to the whirlwind of energy rushing around him as he charged at Inuyasha. "He said he was a Prince of Death," she murmured. "If that is the truth, then...I don't believe an attack that would send him to the Underworld would bother him much."

"He said he was a prince of what?!" Kagome nearly shouted.

"Of death," she repeated, her gaze darting over to the blackness, which was almost fully recovered. "And this stuff must be from there, too. It feeds on the dead and...." She peered down at Sango and Miroku and suddenly found herself moving forward and crouching down. Giving no regard to her wounds, broken bone or torn flesh alike, she gathered up Miroku first, or rather the empty shell of what he had left behind; the mere thought made her want to recoil.

The moment she touched him, however, the blackness began to move, like the undertow of a current seeking an unwitting victim to drag back into the ocean. And yet Kagome, bow and arrow trembling in her grasp, was able to remember herself and her surroundings a far cry better than Lucidity had been able to do so earlier, and released another sacred arrow at the blackness, which immediately retreated once more. What did not manage to escape soon resembled a pile of dust and somewhere beneath the roar of the stomach, renewed shrieks of rage could be heard from Morstua.

"What are you doing?" Jaken demanded when Lucidity laid Miroku over Ah-Un and went back for Sango.

"Take them out of here," Lucidity answered as she carefully placed the daemon slayer beside her husband. Out of mind, out of sight. It was cold, heartless logic, but she needed to concentrate on what was happening. Worry and grief had to come later...much later, or there would be no hope of defeating their foes. 

"I will not-"

"Do as she says, Jaken," came the soft command from Sesshomaru, who had been silently observing.

"But my lord-"

"Go!" said Sesshomaru, his voice sharp, his gaze trained on Inuyasha and Morstua, the pair of whom were still locked in their battle.

The crescents of Meido Zangetsuha continued to rain down around Morstua, impeding his progress, but had no success in drawing him into the void. Even from a distance, Lucidity could see his mounting frustration, felt the rising tumult of gathering energy, and cast a quick glance to Jaken, who had heeded his master's orders and was heading for safety, Ah-Un's bulky form growing hazy through the misty clouds of rain. The sound of footsteps announced Kagome's presence at her side, another arrow knocked tight in her bow. The blackness was amassing once more. In spite of the damage from the sacred arrows, it seemed to be larger than before. Lucidity's gaze darted to the cracks of fractured ground and saw that it was still trickling out, as though the earth itself was bleeding. Below...way down below, like before with the village. Perhaps, if she cut it at the source.... Lucidity soon had Hogosha in hand, unsealing the scythe, just as Sesshomaru unsheathed Bakusaiga and abruptly launched himself in the direction of his brother and Morstua. She spared a quick glance, only to do a double take when Kagome let out a cry of alarm.

Inuyasha was no where to be seen. There hadn't been any sound, any hint, that he'd been beaten. There was only Morstua, or rather what Lucidity glimpsed of him, tearing across the land and dodging the blade of Bakusaiga. Yet, like with the hanyou and Tessaiga, Morstua was now darting around Sesshomaru and his sword.

"Where's Inuyasha?!" Kagome yelled, on the verge of tears. "Where is he?!"

Lucidity had no answers. Absolutely none, and nor did she have the time to give any if she did. The blackness had reared up in a great wave and came crashing towards them, no longer the slow moving mass of ooze. Lucidity dove to the side and caught Kagome around the waist. In the same instant of her rising into the air, Kagome released another arrow, which tore through the wave, but did nothing to slow it down. Lucidity lifted Hogosha and let the heat of the blade slice through, the power cutting into the blackness. It reared back, the head severed, and yet the body remained intact and continued to bubble to the surface, belched from the very Underworld. And gods how Morstua loathed having his precious Baby hacked away at. With a cry of unbridled rage, he sent Sesshomaru smashing into a cluster of trees with a well aimed blow and shot through the air, straight at her and Kagome. Both raised their weapons, but it was Sesshomaru who attacked first.

"Lucidity, out of the way!"

Never had she heard him shout like that, a tightly controlled fury that nonetheless carried with it great stress. It was more than enough to spur her into action as a shower of emerald energy was released. Morstua spun around to face the daiyoukai, who stood among the wreckage of trees, and Lucidity cast herself and Kagome to the wind, a risk to the woman's pregnancy that had to be taken, as the attack from Bakusaiga shredded through Morstua as if he was nothing more than a thin film of tissue. And it would have shredded them just as easily. As it were, Lucidity brought herself and Kagome to the ground behind Sesshomaru, only for the priestess to immediately push away and drop her bow as she collapsed to her knees. 

"Kagome, are you-" 

The sound of retching that reached her ears rendered the question moot. Lucidity, crouched beside the priestess, could do nothing more than hold her by a shoulder while she became sick, unable to do anything beyond helping the woman keep her balance. Lucidity hoped the baby would be fine. She hoped that Inuyasha was fine. Maybe just...unconscious somewhere? Grip tightening on Hogosha, she peered up at Sesshomaru, whose gaze was on the cloud-filled sky, the storm ever relentless. There was no sign of Morstua, not even a few fluttering bits of flesh. Yet it was a temporary fix. Very temporary. Lucidity, watching Sesshomaru turn his attention to the blackness and raise Bakusaiga, was at a loss of what to do when Morstua would inevitably resurface. And yet there was the small ounce of comfort that she was not alone, that she had help, no matter how she had struggled to keep them from here, to save them all from the fate that had already befallen two of their number. 

The volley of power unleashed by Sesshomaru was enough to make Lucidity shiver with her being so close, distracting her from her thoughts. Yet she was not expecting the onslaught of another wave of energy coming from the other direction that crashed into the blackness the same time as Bakusaiga's attack. And the resulting light show had her turning her head away, a wailing cry filling the air and an echoing explosion threatening to deafen all those within reach. Lucidity felt her hair and clothes being tossed about and the heat of the clashing energies soon receded enough that she lifted her head. Without warning, Kagome knocked Lucidity off balance as she jumped to her feet and took off. On the ground, Hogosha still in one hand, Lucidity pushed the wet hair from her face and stared after the priestess, who had flung her arms around the neck of a certain hanyou upon his reappearance, looking bruised and battered with a bleeding temple, but no worse for wear. And as for the blackness, only scattered pieces remained that, even as she watched, were disappearing into the soil.

"Are you injured?" 

Lucidity looked up at the daiyoukai when he spoke. Lightning flashed behind him, casting shadows and illuminating features simultaneously and the resonating thunder that followed rattled the atmosphere as she shook her head. "No more than before," she said. "Are you-" 

"Nothing for you to concern yourself with," was the curt response before she could even finish her sentence. She blinked at him and almost refused to take the extended hand that he offered. However, like every time before, she did so in the end, yet fast when he attempted to pull free once she was on her feet. 

"Always my concern," she murmured and released his hand just as Kagome and Inuyasha approached. His attention lingered on her a moment longer before glanced at his brother.

"You allowed him past your guard, hanyou," Sesshomaru said, the irritation in his tone unmistakable.

Inuyasha snorted. "Like hell! In case you haven't noticed, he's been shrugging off whatever we throw at him. If the Meido Zangetsuha can't stop him...." The anger in Inuyasha's expression suddenly broke and the first lines of worry appeared across his face as he looked around. "Where is the bastard anyway?" 

"Incapacitated for now," said the daiyoukai.

"If that's the case, then...." Inuyasha turned to his wife. "We're getting you out of here." 

Kagome's response was immediate and predictable as she shouted, "I'm not leaving! Don't you dare try and make me, Inuyasha!" 

"I'm not asking for your permission this time, Kagome. In your condition, you never should have left the village. Lucidity, you-"

"Don't bring her into this!" the priestess screeched. "She isn't taking me anywhere, if that's what you're thinking. Do you hear me? I'm not leaving you!" 

"We've already lost Sango and Miroku! I'm not losing you, too!" 

"Inuyasha...that's.... What are you doing?! Put me down! OSUWARI!" 

The hanyou kissed the ground with a resounding THUD as Kagome skittered out of his reach, weeping and shouting that she wasn't letting him cart her off, that she was staying right by his side, and so much more drabble that Lucidity very much did not want to get between the two. She peered around, too anxious to let her guard down for a moment longer, even when surrounded by allies. Standing here, each of them with a weapon drawn, she wondered what more could they do but wait? It seemed a ridiculous idea, twiddling their thumbs while Morstua recovered and the blackness pieced itself together again-if the combined attack from the Inu brothers hadn't been enough, that is. Her nails scraped along the shaft of Hogosha when she felt the brush of a kimono against her side and glanced over to find Sesshomaru hardly a foot from her. If he turned his head, he'd be able to rest his chin on top of her hair, he was so close. 

"We will all die here if something is not done," he said in a soft voice, narrowed eyes scanning the drenched and destitute landscape.

"Don't sugarcoat it," Lucidity muttered.

"We should gather our resources and return another day," was the stark reply that stunned her into silence. 

It was Inuyasha who eventually responded first as he picked himself up off the ground, staring at his brother in open-mouthed astonishment. "Are you saying we should retreat?" 

"Unless you wish the death of your woman and unborn child, you are welcome to stay," said Sesshomaru. "We have nothing that is capable of defeating an immortal Prince of Death." Golden eyes slid over to Lucidity, who felt herself automatically tense and was unable to understand why until he spoke again. "The only weapon at our disposal is useless." 

A flush blazed across her cheeks and she looked away. Rather than be filled with any sort of righteous wrath at the brutal honesty, she was nothing short of embarrassed. She knew it cost him greatly to admit that they were outmatched, but what he said was the truth. Somehow the Guardian was supposed to be the key in defeating the rising evil, but this had to be some sort of sick joke. She was no Guardian. She couldn't even defend herself, let alone anyone else, let alone the world! Sango and Miroku were just the beginning. Gods, what had she been thinking?! She was no daughter of any deity. She was nothing but a fool given a taste of power and had believed that would be enough. How could she hope to protect anything? 

"Come on, let's get out of here." Inuyasha's voice cut through her thoughts and she glanced up to see him sheathe Tessaiga before Kagome clambered onto his back. "We should head back to the Isle," he added.

Back to the Isle...where it was safe. Lucidity pushed a hand through her dripping hair as the hanyou bounded off and realized she would be fishing for a strand whenever they came across a body of water to summon the ferry. And there was also the necessity of locating Jaken and Ah-Un. As she retracted Hogosha and slid it away, she glanced over at Sesshomaru, or more accurately to the sword still sheathed at his waist. Had Sango or Miroku ever been brought back by Tenseiga? Was there a chance? She did not like the thought of reviving them, only to send them back into the same battle that they may very well lose their lives to again. Yet the only other option was to leave them as they were, which she could not allow if there was a choice. 

"Your thoughts are transparent," Sesshomaru remarked suddenly. "You wish me to save the monk and daemon slayer." 

"I wish a lot of things," she replied without looking at him. 

"Indeed," he said. "Let us find Jaken and return to the Isle." 

She didn't argue. She was too exhausted, too injured, too...defeated to put up any fight. There was nothing more she could do here, nothing more that any of them could do. She followed Sesshomaru as he rose into the air and felt the overwhelming sense that this...that all of it was one colossal mistake, a belief that managed to strengthen when she felt a breath of wind rush over her and the painfully familiar burn of the blackness coiling around her legs and waist. No warning, no chance to escape, as it dragged her back down and into the unforgiving grasp of a pair of arms that began to crush the very life from her body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slowly, but surely the chapters are coming! Only a handful more to go, it looks like. I think I might title the chapters after I'm done, just for the fun of it. But I do hope everyone is still enjoying themselves! Any feedback is appreciated! Or do we all just want Morstua to have his ass handed to him?


	48. Chapter 48

Lucidity was trapped in the clutches of a nightmare. Quite literally. It was as if he'd been spawned from the Pit of Tartarus and had trudged through the River Styx and any other form of Hell for good measure. His beauty had been shattered and pieced back together like a crudely sewn doll. His porcelain skin, no longer radiant or ethereal, had been fractured and the cracks painted over with black. _The_ blackness, she was certain. A whole eye and both arms had even been replaced by it and his torso was littered with its jagged pattern. His touch was what burned, not the tendrils of molten tar; though, when he smiled, she saw that his saliva, staining those once perfect teeth, might as well have been. The saliva trickled down his chin in dark rivulets that were quickly lost under the torrent of rain that continued to fall as he squeezed her against him, front-to-front, arms trapped at her sides by his. She was barely able to draw in enough breath and completely unable to shift forms.

"Disobedient bitch," Morstua said with unmistakable delight. "You would dare leave me? You would force me to punish you so early into our relationship?" He started to laugh, that constant, voracious laughter, which she knew would haunt her memories should she be fortunate to live long enough.

Yet when lasso of green energy seized him around the throat, his mirth died almost at once, replaced by a mild confusion and seemingly idle curiosity when he peered down the length of the Whip to the one who wielded it. Lucidity caught a glimpse of Sesshomaru holding the Whip taut and noticed Morstua's head being forced back as a thin line of dark blood, thick and congealed, slid down his neck. And then Sesshomaru was rushing forward, his other arm drawn back, fingers dripping with the acidic poison of his claws. Yet he never had a chance to strike, not with the spikes that burst from Morstua's body, just like the ones that had impaled the daiyoukai back in the cavern. Sesshomaru was forced to dodge out of the way, a blur of fur and silver, as the glow of the Whip and poison disappeared. Again came the laughter, high and loud in her ears, and Lucidity felt herself being lifted, off the ground, into the sky, and being turned around so that she might face whatever was before them.

Pain laced up her arm as a hand closed over her broken wrist, dragging it behind her back, while his other hand gripped her by the throat. She could still breathe, panting as she was from the constant pulse of agony from different points throughout her body. Shattered bones, the scorching coil of blackness holding her waist and other arm in place, and the hole in her gut, to name a few. Yet now there was a new pain, a trickling sensation of hot needles that was spreading upward from her stomach. Slowly it crept through her, like the spread of water winding itself through a maze of insanity in search of the fated center. And with every passing second, the pain intensified, grew hotter, and she couldn't stop herself from shaking as she gritted her teeth throughout the entire ordeal.

"How it must hurt," purred Morstua in her ear, "to have Baby in your very veins. Yet why must you be so stubborn? You know I love to hear your voice. Cry out for me; let them know the consequences of defying me. Do you need help again to be heard?"

And he twisted the broken wrist until she could remember nothing but the searing agony and her voice escaped her just as he desired. She could feel it now, too, the blackness inside, winding and unwinding, stretching deeper and further from the wound in her stomach, weaving through organs and limbs alike. Morstua was cackling before he began to whisper, saying that Baby's poison would weaken her, but he would never allow the dosage to be fatal. There was no fun if it was fatal.

"And your dog is at it again," Morstua murmured. "He likes to bite, this one. Look at him; he's so beautiful in his temper. Go on. I'm permitting you to look. Have your fill, for you'll never have another chance."

Lucidity looked. She wanted to. She had to, but no part of her wanted to believe that this would be the last time she'd see Sesshomaru. He did make a magnificent sight, though, the way he moved, how he avoided the tendrils of blackness and at the same time hacked away at the offending appendages with Bakusaiga, his expression so alert and focused, intent upon his goal of absolute annihilation of the enemy.

"He and that mutt brother of his will pay for what they did to Baby," Morstua continued and the first chime of anger entered his voice. "Keeping her inside me is merely a precaution. She will feast on their corpses in the end, of that I promise. And you, my lovely whore, shall be mine. Completely. I will be the only one to breed you. My brothers can content themselves when they subdue the other Guardians. Yet my family is known for their patience; for now, one Guardian is enough to help us reach our goals. And you will suffice in the meantime, as well."

Lucidity wasn't entirely certain what was meant by all that. The agony expanding inside her made it almost impossible to concentrate. Her vision was beginning to swim and every rapid pulse inside her chest brought on a fresh wave of pain. She tried to remain alert, tried to keep Sesshomaru in her sights, but he was moving too quickly, too intent upon the tendrils still coming for him. Absurdly, she attempted to call out to him. For what reason, she didn't know, but it didn't matter; she couldn't speak, could barely hold her head up, in fact.

"Oh? Already?" she heard Morstua say, before his voice suddenly became louder and he called out, "Sesshomaru, is it? I believe that is enough playtime. Yes, I think it's time to kill you now, but I wanted you to know, before you are a rotting, bloated corpse, just how gravely you have offended me, that you, a lowly mortal, would dare lay claim to a daughter of the Mother. The fact that you would mark a Guardian, even a half-breed bitch, displays your incredible ignorance. I want you to die knowing that I shall be removing all traces of you and taking her for my own. Even now as we speak, my darkness has reached her heart and will keep her compliant for me. She'll learn to be a good girl and will soon forget about everything else, including you."

Body limp, head down, Lucidity could feel Morstua rising higher into the air. Her eyes slid open to see the ground growing further and further away. There were Kagome and Inuyasha, standing back, weapons drawn. Yet they weren't attacking. Why not? No clear shot? Was Sesshomaru in the way? Where was Sesshomaru? She tried to turn her head, but the moment she managed, hot breath touched her neck and that oily voice sang in her ear.

"Watch," ordered Morstua, "and learn. What is close to your heart will be the price you shall pay for your defiance."

The price she would pay? The...only price? Where had she heard that before? Was it important somehow? It had to be. Why else would the words be so familiar? Why...?

Wind was whistling in her ears, rushing around her face, as her hair and clothes fluttered about. Morstua had released her. The world spun with such confusion as she plummeted, unable to stop her descent and too weakened to even imagine the resounding impact of the ground in the immediate future. She knew it was inevitable, that she couldn't stop it, just like she couldn't stop anything else. And that was why she was so disoriented when the impact never came. Instead, she felt the warm grasp of arms, clutching her firmly to a hard, unyielding body.

"Gotcha!" whispered a hoarse voice, and her eyes fluttered open just enough to take in a sea of red.

Inuyasha brought her safely to the ground and set her down on the muddy earth. "Keep an eye on her, Kagome," he said.

"I will," she heard the priestess reply. "Please be careful, Inuyasha."

"We're getting out of here in one piece, I promise. Just stay on your guard until I can get Sesshomaru away from him."

The mention of the daiyoukai jolted Lucidity back into full awareness. Her eyes snapped open, but she could see nothing but the endless expanse of dark sky and clouds, the downpour of rain that seemed intent upon drowning the land and all who dwell here. Every inch of her ached. Even moving her arm, the one not riddled with broken bones, cost more effort than she could have believed possible, as if she was pushing against a boulder while trying to simply sit up. Yet the moment she began to struggle upright, a hand on her shoulder brought her back down and she was dismayed to find it was Kagome who had so easily subdued her.

"Don't move," she said. "You're seriously injured. Don't!"

But of course, Lucidity did not listen as she attempted to rise. "Where's Sesshomaru?" she asked, only to be held in place by one hand no less, while the priestess gripped her bow in the other.

"Don't worry, he's still fighting," Kagome said. "Inuyasha's helping him. They work really well together, actually. You'll see; they will get us out of here in no time."

No...no, that wasn't going to happen. With that hand firmly upon her shoulder, Lucidity allowed herself to collapse back onto the ground as a sense of despair washed over her, sinking deep inside and nestling there. Hopeless. That was what this was. They didn't have a chance. Kaidame...he's the one. He was the one who had said those words, and that the rising power would kill them all if she didn't go to the Isle. Yet she had. It had turned her existence upside down. But she had tried. She'd tried so hard to fill this impossible role. And for what? To fail when it mattered most? Yeah...that seemed about right. Sango. Miroku. Everyone was going to die and there was nothing she could do.

And when she heard Kagome scream, it didn't surprise her. She opened her eyes and spotted the priestess sprinting away, leaving her charge behind. Of course, it didn't matter. Lucidity was the only one Morstua was going to spare, from death at least, but not from torment. With a grunt, Lucidity began to sit up, or rather made another attempt. Her limbs and back, muscles and lungs, protested the effort almost immediately. Her body burned with the effort and she knew it was the blackness, coursing through her, eating away at her strength. The most she was able to do was roll onto her stomach and push herself up onto her arms. Her head and vision swam and it took several moments before she was able to focus, to understand what she was seeing.

Remnants of spikes were disintegrating under the wake of a sacred arrow, creating an ashen path that was quickly disappearing, trailing from the body of the hanyou on the ground. Spread-eagle on his back and a rusty, old sword in his grasp, Kagome dropped down beside Inuyasha, straight into a pool of his blood. Was he...dead? He wasn't moving, perhaps not even breathing. And his sword, the beloved Tessaiga, was dormant. That could only happen if its master was deceased or unconscious. Kagome had an ear to his chest, but then straightened up and began to shake him, calling his name over and over. And, as Lucidity watched, that same sinking sensation seized her, and she couldn't stop herself from adding the priestess to the ever growing list of widows this time of warfare produced.

With what felt like a frozen fist closing over her heart, Lucidity lifted her head. Sesshomaru was there, ever relentless in his battle against the Prince of Death, regardless of his brother being struck down. Was he furious that he was not the one to kill Inuyasha? He didn't seem to have noticed. At least that was the impression he gave until he spared a quick glance to the devastation below, his golden eyes glittering with a fierce and silent fury that he soon turned upon Morstua. How long until he joined his brother? How long until Kagome joined Miroku and Sango? There was no defeating Morstua. There was nothing any of them could do.

Kagome was trying to draw Inuyasha's upright, using herself as a prop, by the time Lucidity peered back over. Ah, but...he wasn't dead. His chest was shredded. He was coughing and blood was spraying down his chin and neck. His eyes were so dull and filled with pain and, in turn, filled Lucidity with dread. He was holding Tessaiga out to Kagome, telling her something, but Kagome was shaking her head, seemed to be begging, and Inuyasha's face contorted with agony. The sword fell from his grasp as he collapsed back against her, hacking up even more blood that stained his already red haori redder still. 

The same had happened to Lucidity when the Sisters had put her through the last trial. She'd lost consciousness in Sesshomaru's arms, coughing up the blood that had been filling her lungs. And this...this was what would happen to him, as well, this excruciating and bloody end. What was close to her heart would be the price she would pay and those she cared about would pay with their lives. She couldn't stop it. Not Morstua, not the blackness, not the deaths of her friends, or the death of Sesshomaru!

"Mother," she murmured, the name breaking from her before she realized what she was saying. "Mother, please, don't let this happen." She lowered her head until her forehead came to rest on her arm and the scent of wet soil invaded her senses. "You brought me here to keep the balance. You brought him into this to keep me safe. And now we're going to be killed or worse. What more could you want? What do you want of _me_ , Mother? Please tell me. I'll do anything; just don't let them suffer because of my failures."

The words, born of desperation, came spilling out in a rush. She didn't know what else to do. She was completely out of options. Sesshomaru was the last one who stood between Morstua and his goals now and it was just a matter of time before the daiyoukai was struck down as well. And then it would be over. Anyone who meant a damn to Lucidity would be gone and she knew, beyond all doubt, that she'd never recover. And somehow, it would be her fault. In some twisted sense of logic, she knew she had not done enough to save anyone. 

It came without warning, the flames that tore up her side, or so it felt like. For one, wild moment she believed that the blackness had burst out of her like some alien creature. Yet it was Hogosha. Groping at her waist, her fingers found the sealed scythe that burned beneath her hand. The second she touched it, the world turned white.

* * *

Silence.

Absolute.

No roar of thunder, nor shower of rain. No cries from a grieving priestess. No clashes of a distant battle. It was completely and utterly without noise, wherever she was. Lucidity could feel the silence pressing against her ears like a pair of warm hands. She no longer felt the downpour of the storm or the agony of her wounds, no weakness of her body. Slowly, she opened her eyes and lifted her head, her labored breath filling the void. Was it a void? She could still see the ground, the mist of rain, the figures of Kagome and Inuyasha. Yet it was as if she was watching everything through frosted glass that created a distortion in the image. Not only that, everything and everyone was frozen, right down to the last raindrop hitting the mud. The only thing that appeared to be real, other than herself, was a woman standing in front of her.

She wore an ancient, albeit traditional set of robes that suggested mediocre wealth at best. She was short with long ebony hair that hung about her face and shoulders in loose curls, perfect almond eyes that were as dark as her hair, and a face that was smooth and fair. Pretty, not overly beautiful, but certainly not unattractive. And the expression on her face was riddled with mild curiosity as she gazed down at Lucidity, as if she was expecting an explanation for the utter strangeness of the situation.

Lucidity pushed herself up and managed to stand with shocking ease, considering how much difficulty she'd had simply rolling over a moment ago. She was still wounded and covered in blood, but the pain of it was a mere shadow, and she looked at the woman with a bewildered frown. "Who are you?" she asked, and then a thought struck her as her eyes widened. "Y-you're not.... You can't be the Mother, can you?"

The woman blinked before suddenly smiling, the way one might when indulging a child showing off a spectacularly awful drawing. "No one can put a face or form to Our Mother," she said. "I was not born with a name, but my husband called me 'Satomi.' Yet that does not really answer your question, does it? Though I believe you can work the answer out for yourself, since you have been carrying me around with you all this time."

"I...what? Carrying you around?"

Satomi pointed at Lucidity's waist and Lucidity reached down to the pouch that she now discovered was empty.

"Hogosha?" she asked. "But Hogosha's a weapon. I don't understand."

"A weapon created to help you channel your power until you are able to properly wield it without the aid of such a crutch. Yet how was Hogosha created?"

"With the...uh...the essence of...." A cold shock of realization struck Lucidity and felt her jaw drop as she stared at the woman gazing so serenely at her. " _You're_ the last Guardian?!"

Satomi nodded. "Your predecessor, yes. And I see you have been quite busy, trying to-as you say-fill in my shoes." She smiled, but abruptly turned and started to walk away. And Lucidity, not knowing what else to do, followed.

"What's going on? Is this a dream or some sort of vision?" she asked as she reached out and tried to grasp hold of a raindrop, only for it to go right through her hand. Turning her gaze upward, Lucidity bit down on her lip at the sight of Sesshomaru, locked battle with Morstua, the latter of whom had both hands on the blade of Bakusaiga and was beaming such an awful smile at the daiyoukai.

"Mother is not bound to any one place in time," said Satomi, also stopping to take in the spectacle and folding her arms in a stance that suggested disapproval. "That is how She knew to bring you here, to the era you were needed most. We, as Her children, are trapped in the linear existence where one second becomes another. Yet She can draw us out if She so chooses, when it is necessary, but we are unable to interact with those on the other plane of existence."

"So...we are out of time," Lucidity muttered, and Satomi chuckled.

"A concept that, from my understanding, you are not unfamiliar with," she replied. "It is also why your pain is less; Morstua's creation is not welcomed here."

Lucidity didn't respond immediately. Her attention remained on Sesshomaru, at the cold calculation and seething anger mixed into his piercing eyes that were solely focused on Morstua. "Satomi," she murmured, "are you here because of my begging the Mother? Did She send you or...awaken you, however it works?"

"I'm sure Mother heard you, Lucidity, but I was the one who chose to answer," she said. "I simply asked Mother to grant us some privacy."

"Why now?" Lucidity pressed. "I've asked the Mother before for help, for answers. Is this really the end for us then? Is that why?"

"Yes, this is the end, but that is not the reason," was the candid response. "You've asked many questions these last few months. Whether aloud or not, I've heard them all. The difference, this time, is that you mean it."

"Mean what? That I'd do anything to keep my friends alive?"

Satomi drew her gaze from Sesshomaru and Morstua and met Lucidity's eye with a hard frown. "Don't lie," she admonished. "It's your Protector you wish to save more than anyone else. You would rather die than have anything happen to him, right?"

Lucidity flushed at the sound of her own, private thoughts being echoed back at her. "Yes, but-"

"I would have done the same for my husband," Satomi said, her expression softening. "I would have let millions perish if it meant he survived. I know you care about your friends. They're your family, no? But it is your Protector you love the most and it is he you would die for. Is that not true?"

Lucidity swallowed and nodded.

"You would give up existence as you know it?" Satomi asked and Lucidity nodded again. "Can you do it? Accept your role, take on my memories and my mantle? Will you stop fighting our Mother?"

Heart racing, her gaze drifted back up to Sesshomaru and it was a moment or two before she noticed that she was chewing on a thumbnail. She lowered her hand, which clenched into a fist. Fingers brushed over her palm and she felt the outline of the scar. Her eyes searched for some glimpse of the mark she knew still marred Sesshomaru, but it was impossible. Clothing, weapons, and Morstua were in the way. Finally, she glanced over at Satomi, her resolve hardening. "Yes," she answered. 

Satomi smiled, stepped up to Lucidity, and smacked her full across the face. 

Lucidity staggered back, a hand going to her now painfully stinging cheek. "What the hell?!"

"Liar," Satomi replied, so perfectly calm and collected. "You shall always be at odds with our Mother, but that is to be expected of a willful child; however, that does not mean you aren't sincere. You have accepted Her more than once. To a point, you have given yourself over. And now you must do so completely, give up control and let it happen, as you have done with your Protector." 

The analogy was so simple and yet Lucidity was gripped with a cold shock as a trickle of comprehension began to force its way to the forefront of her mind. And just as quickly, she shoved it away and shook her head. "That is...what I must do?" she murmured. "That is all?" 

Satomi let out a sudden giggle and covered her mouth as though it was an unsightly noise. "Of course not," she said. "You must find the source of your power." 

"But I don't know-" 

"She holds the key," Satomi interrupted and pointed to the priestess. 

Lucidity stared, glancing between both of the woman, one frozen and one patiently smiling. "Kagome?" she asked. "But how? Is it because she is from the same era as me?" 

"Oh, no, no, that's not it," said Satomi with a shake of her head. "I'll admit that Kagome is unusual, as you are, but in some ways she is just like every other woman." 

"What do you mean?" Lucidity asked. 

"Go and see for yourself," was, in her opinion, the most unhelpful reply. 

With a sigh, Lucidity turned and approached the hanyou and priestess. The echoing footsteps from behind told her that Satomi was following. Yet when they reached the pair, Lucidity could not find anything amiss. Kagome and Inuyasha were just as before, with Inuyasha struggling with the blood filling his lungs and the wounds seeping the life from his body, while his wife gripped him tight and cried her steady tears. Lucidity did not like the sight and was glad for the excuse to peer back at Satomi. "What am I supposed to be looking for?" 

Yet Satomi merely smiled and said, "Go on." 

Utterly bewildered, she took an uncertain step towards the couple, frowning down at them, searching, and wondering what it was she was supposed to see here. The two had eyes only for each other, paying no heed to the looming threat of death so close by. Tessaiga had been picked up and embedded in the ground since last she saw, leaving Kagome and Inuyasha free to entangle their hands so tightly together. Or, from what Lucidity could see, Inuyasha had his one hand pressed to Kagome's stomach while she covered it with both of hers. And the expression on his face was painful to look at. He seemed so happy and yet so sad, smiling through the agony of his wounds, knowing that he would die, but that Kagome had to be the one to survive, both for her sake and the baby's. 

"She's pregnant. Is that what you mean?" asked Lucidity, looking over at Satomi, and received nothing but a sigh in return.

"Go on," she repeated. 

"Go on?" Lucidity echoed. "What more is supposed to be going on? Just tell me!" 

Satomi nodded her head towards Kagome. "Go on." 

Fucking hell?! What was that supposed to mean?! 

Out of ideas, Lucidity moved towards the priestess, then glanced back at Satomi, who nodded once more. Shaking her head, Lucidity crouched down in front of Kagome and Inuyasha, less than an arm's length away, and looked to Satomi again. Those same two words were repeated a fourth time by the last Guardian and Lucidity could think of nothing else but to reach out and ease a hand against Kagome's stomach, right over theirs. Exactly as had happened with the raindrop, her hand went right through. She couldn't feel a damn thing.... 

But she could see. 

A picture flashed across her mind: a woman holding a baby in a hospital bed. It wasn't Kagome, but the woman's features-her eyes, the structure of her face, the texture of her hair-were strikingly similar. And yet before Lucidity could properly study the image, it was replaced by another woman holding another baby. Again, the resemblance was uncanny, though the setting was in a different hospital. It happened a third time, then a fourth, a fifth, over and over until Lucidity lost count and even then the pictures did not stop. Each image was a steady regression back through the decades, like a silent film depicting the origins of childbirth until eventually there were no hospitals, but private homes that became smaller, less sophisticated, until the dwellings were nothing but the huts of this ancient era. Sometimes, there were no mothers, just the infants, and Lucidity did not need to catch the glimpse of a funeral shroud to know the reason for this. Without end, the vision was, going back further and further until the huts disappeared, replaced by crude homes of straw. And, further still, during a time when there were no permanent homes, no villages or estates, no type of government and the barest concept of hierarchy. Lucidity saw a time where gigantic beasts roamed the world and the people roamed with them, following their migrations over a changing landscape of harsh elements. And here she glimpsed the mothers and infants, the unbroken line of Kagome's ancestors over the course of millions of years of evolution, descending into a species lost to history, a missing link Lucidity had no true name for. Her conscious mind could not fully comprehend what she was being shown, but on a some instinctual level, she did not need an explanation. On some level, she knew what was happening.

The images were coming so quickly now, bleeding into one another, an endless reel of creatures that modern day humans would never discover. The creatures walked upon the land, then regressed to the trees, and finally returned to the water, became less complex and single celled until there were no organisms, but simply the churning of an earth in its infancy. Lands and seas, clouds and lightning, the forming atmosphere and the moon, that may or may not have been part of another planet that collided with this one. And then Lucidity saw what came before the earth, when it was nothing but a collection of particles in a cold, empty space with a raging star at the center, already beyond the concept of ancient and yet so young in comparison with the other balls of gas within the universe, the fires of which had long since died out. And so lonely, too, this star was, with the tentative formation of its children that were destined to dance around its light. Eight or perhaps nine children? And out of those eight or nine, how many would be fated to bear their own offspring within themselves?

And the core of the great star, its origins, its creator, a mystery of mysteries some would say. Yet the true and ultimate mystery was the creation of the creator. What forces could be responsible for the start of it all? Was it nothing more than a sudden explosion into being? A big bang and there it all was, laid out in an expanse that could never be fully comprehended, stretching into infinity? No beginning. No end. Life existed. It simply was.

Life truly was everything.

Lucidity stumbled away from the priestess and collapsed with a hard gasp, her breathing labored from the rough shock of finding herself confined inside something as crude as a form constructed of blood and bone. For one, wild moment, she was maddened with fury at being so trapped, to the point of irrational panic that had her scrambling to her feet and nearly breaking down this body of flesh, until she felt a hand on her shoulder. She spun around and stared, bewildered and more than a little agitated, at the woman standing before her, until she was slapped across the face so hard that she almost fell.

"Stop doing that!" Lucidity shouted as she jumped out of range and rubbed her cheek for a second time.

"You seemed out of sorts," Satomi replied, sounding far too amused. "Feel better? Is your head clearer?"

Lucidity gave a derisive snort.

Satomi began to smile, only for her expression to wither into a solemn seriousness. "Do you see now? Do you understand?"

As she lowered her arm, Lucidity held the dark gaze of her predecessor. She felt no sense of dread or fear, nor excitement or fury.  It was as if she was peering into the eye of the storm; or perhaps she was the eye, because there was nothing but this clear serenity in her mind. "What there is to understand is understood," she said. "And what cannot be understood is acknowledged."

Satomi blinked, and then suddenly beamed. "That is one of the first things Kuki said to me. But of course, you know that." And when Lucidity nodded, Satomi strode forward. Hands came to rest on Lucidity's shoulders before the last Guardian stood on tiptoe to lay a kiss to her forehead. "Bear in mind," the woman murmured, "that I am the last of Hogosha's power. When our Mother brings you back to the linear plane, Hogosha shall cease to be and you will need to forge your own weapons. And do not forget," Satomi touched Lucidity's chest, "that the darkness in your heart must be purged. The agony of it awaits.... Are you ready, Lucidity?"

A heavy sigh rose from her and she closed her eyes. "No," she murmured, "but have Mother return me to the battle anyway."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! An update! Little later than usual, but here it is! Don't have much to say on it, other than I hope you all enjoyed. Please let me know if anything here needs some clarification. Some of it is meant to be abstract, but if it's too much, please don't hesitate to ask! ^.^


	49. Chapter 49

"Adapt at masking his aura" was a poorly worded statement. It lessened the idea behind the sheer capacity in which his opponent was capable of restraining his power. With four of their number dead or struck down, the youkai lord eventually had a decent grasp on what it meant to challenge a Prince of Death. Being immune to the affects of Bakusaiga or the Meido Zangetsuha was simply the means to discovering this beast was immortal and that was enough to consider a retreat from the battle. Had he been alone, Sesshomaru would have taken his final stand rather than turn away in the face of defeat, as it was not his life he thought of when casting his pride into the abyss and proclaiming that they, including himself, did not have what was necessary to win this war. What was needed had not been located in time, a matter he could not fault Lucidity for on some level. What he did fault her for was coming here before she was properly prepared, intending to give her life in the mere hopes of putting a stop to the spreading evil.

Yet he knew that, even if some part of him angry at her for being the first, Inuyasha and the others would have done the same. He, Sesshomaru, would have done the same. They did not need the excuse of coming after Lucidity to hunt down the threat to their lands. And here were the consequences: the monk and daemon slayer dead, Lucidity incapacitated, and the hanyou clinging to this world in a body that had been torn open. Now it was only the daiyoukai against the Prince of Death, pitting strength against strength with the blade of Bakusaiga gripped tight by his mocking opponent, that disfigured face with blackened teeth leering at him, amusement dancing in those duel-colored eyes. And then the other whispered to him, spoke of the deeds he would commit, what he intended for these lands, for Lucidity, how he would delight in making her his, that he was the only one worthy to ever touch a daughter of the Mother.

The promise of such vile acts fed a resentment in the daiyoukai that he had known for a select few throughout his life, a resentment that bordered upon pure loathing. And it also created a sense of urgency to the fight. This needed to be brought to an end. The Prince of Death must be defeated. And, if not, those he threatened should be taken to the Isle, to be kept safe. However, Sesshomaru was aware that this urgency was useless and would lead to panic; and he, the youkai lord of the west, would not succumb to such weakness.

Sesshomaru pressed forward as rain continued to drench the battle and blood trickled over Bakusaiga's blade where it cut into the flesh of his opponent. There was a flicker of surprise on the man's face before he smiled at the daiyoukai. "Angry, are we?" he taunted. "You can hack me into as many pieces as you like, pup; it will do you no good. You cannot win."

With a rush of energy and brute force, Sesshomaru freed Bakusaiga from his grasp, severing several fingers in the process, and heard nothing but that infuriating laughter in return as the other descended to the ground. Sesshomaru followed, landing on the other side of the muddy field, blood and water dripping from the point of Bakusaiga. "Your arrogance will be your undoing," he said. "And I shall bear witness to your downfall, even if it means my death."

Again came the laughter, peals of it ringing in his ears, as the Prince threw his head back. "You idiot mortal!" he crowed. "I have existed long before your ancestors crawled from the muck to breathe the air of this planet and I shall be here long after the bones of your descendants are dust." He brought his hand up to display the the exposed muscle and sinew of the fingers that were already regrowing. "Death cannot be killed!" 

No, but perhaps he could be trapped. If he was cut with the Meido Zangetsuha, he would be sent directly to the Underworld. That was the mistake Inuyasha had made, when the crescents of the Meido Zangetsuha failed to drag the Prince of Death into the void. It could still be done, though, if that foolish hanyou wasn't dead yet. And if he was, Tenseiga would revive him, so long as Sesshomaru was able to find an opening to do so. The heel of his boot dug into the slick earth as thunder echoed overhead and he lifted Bakusaiga, energy pulsing through the weapon.

Power erupted across the battlefield. 

Sesshomaru jerked his head around in search of the source, but found nothing. The magnitude of it...overwhelmed, as if the gates of Hell were opening wide to swallow the earth. And yet there was no sign of what could possess such power. He could only feel the rumbling ground beneath his feet and the crackle of lightning before it struck. First one spot, then another, and within seconds the area was being littered with the cacophony of blasts that rattled even the daiyoukai's body with the explosions of thunder. Wind began to howl. The force of it uprooted the remaining trees and Sesshomaru had to brace himself against the unexpected onslaught of elements. He peered over at the Prince and knew none of this was his doing. The Prince's mouth hung open in blatant astonishment as he watched the spectacle, his attention fixed, and Sesshomaru took the opportunity. Not to attack, but to return to the side of-

He stopped. The spot where Inuyasha had placed her, where she had been laying when the hanyou was injured, was empty. Quickly he scanned the area, but there was only the priestess covering the prone figure of Inuyasha with her body, in spite of the barrier Tessaiga had erected around them. In a single leap, he closed the distance between himself and the pair.

"Where is Lucidity?" he demanded, but the priestess merely glanced up and shook her head, the strong smell of salt water clinging to her. He nearly growled at her worthless observations as he turned away, his gaze sweeping the terrain once more. And yet he saw nothing but the insanity that nature had become. Overheard, the clouds were churning. The rain pelted sharply at the skin, heavy and relentless until, in one great upheaval, the unseen power shot upward and burst apart. The clouds rolled, scattered, and evaporated. The downpour stopped as readily as a heart pierced with an arrow and an expanse of blue sky was all that remained.

On the other side of the field, the Prince of Death cursed, and then yelled as the storm-shattering power slammed him into the mud, where he slid a short distance before coming to stop. The power flared before abruptly calming as a form appeared in a soft whirlwind a few yards in front of Sesshomaru. Her clothes were still torn and stained with blood. He could see her wounds beneath the shredded fabric, mere shadows, as if she had been been given days to heal. Standing upright, with no hint of the damage the Prince and his blackness had crippled her with, Lucidity peered over her shoulder at the daiyoukai with a blank expression that seemed to convey little more than a passing curiosity.

Blue eyes, he noted. Solid with no whites, just as had happened when she'd been revived by the Four Sisters, save this time the blue did not fade.

"You've been troublesome, Morstua," she said upon turning her back on Sesshomaru.

And the Prince of Death, this Morstua, clambered to his feet, looking far less amused than usual. "A boy has to keep himself entertained," he said, a strain in his voice that did not match the nonchalant manner in which he brushed himself off. "You understand, right? We get bored sometimes."

"Plotting the rape and impregnation of a Guardian is a strange form of entertainment for you and your brothers," Lucidity replied.

"What's going on?" was the whispered question from behind Sesshomaru. "How is she able to fight?"

Sesshomaru didn't answer, but felt the weight of Bakusaiga in his hand and the sudden lack of pain in the other. A glance to his scarred palm revealed that the mark had quieted. No longer scarlet with agony for the first time in days, it could mean only one thing. His mouth tightened into a frown as he shifted his attention back to Lucidity and Morstua, in time to witness the latter raise and then immediately drop his arms in a gesture of defeat.

"It's new," he said. "I like new. It's intriguing. Wouldn't you agree? You're still new, right? If not, I have to say, you picked the worst possible moment to come back. I really want to have some fun. We still could, you know? I'll even let you be on top."

Sesshomaru stepped forward, body tense with the effort it took to ward off this sudden impulse to attack, until he noticed Lucidity approaching Morstua, whose smile soon faltered, and he began to move away.

"Okay, okay, fine!" he exclaimed. "No touching. Let's just battle this out like always and I'll be on my way. I'll take Baby with me, too. All of her. Is she-"

"The part of your creation that infected this body is dead," Lucidity said. "The rest of that disgusting thing will meet the same fate. Why the North allowed it to live is beyond me; I will be having words with her. As for you-"

"No!" shouted Morstua. "You're putting me in timeout?! If you are, let me have Baby for company! Just...just a tiny bit and I promise I won't be a bother to you anymore."

"Timeout?" Lucidity echoed, an incredulous note filling her voice, the first inflection to be heard. "You killed my friends and tried to force yourself onto me. A timeout is not sufficient enough for this grievance."

Morstua was rapidly backing away, hands up in surrender, as Lucidity continued walking towards him in those careful, measured steps. "That's how it's always been done," he said. "You Guardians seal us up when we become too irritating, we eventually break out, and it's back to work. You can't kill me, not really. And my father won't like it if you-"

"Do not make empty threats! Your father has not made himself known since before your brother hurled his great rock at us. And besides, I thought you enjoyed new experiences? For instance: have you ever had your remains scattered?"

"You...you bitch! You wouldn't?!"

"I owe you, Morstua," Lucidity whispered. 

With a shout, the Prince of Death spun around, all arrogance and bravado forgotten as he took to the air in a grand show of cowardice. Powerful and immortal, he was nothing more than a child at heart, who balked at the slightest challenge. When Lucidity appeared before him, blocking his path, he, in a wild movement of panic, struck out at her. She caught him rather lazily and showed no signs of pain or discomfort from a wrist that had been broken minutes ago when she drove her fist into his face. The front of his skull caved in. Nose, mouth, eyes, obliterated before she yanked a blood-covered hand free. No more taunts, no more laughter. There was perfect silence from the spineless Morstua as he reached up, touching the damage with shaking hands. Lucidity studied the sight of his ruined face with a subtle intrigue, fascinated by the results of her actions. In a way, it reminded Sesshomaru of his mother, when she had inspected her own arm drenched in Lucidity's blood after killing her. Witnessing Lucidity doing the same gave him pause as he considered the similarities between the two women, before Lucidity suddenly disappeared, dissolving both her body and Morstua's into nothing, and Sesshomaru could sense only a faint trace of the Guardian's aura rising into the sky.  

A noise from behind reminded the daiyoukai that he wasn't alone. He turned to see that the priestess had opened Inuyasha's haori to reveal the damage. The strangled moan that had caught in her throat was a reaction to the shredded ribbons of flesh and the blackened veins that were spreading outward from the wound; Inuyasha would bear the scar, just as Sesshomaru still did.

The daiyoukai stepped closer, only to be warded off by the crackle of Tessaiga's barrier. "Take it down," he ordered. Kagome mutely obeyed, removing the Fang from the ground to set it aside, so that he was able to crouch beside her. It was a slight surprise to discover that Inuyasha still lived. Unconscious, but alive just the same. His breaths were shallow and rattled as though he was preparing to welcome death. Yet the pulse Sesshomaru found in the hanyou's neck was strong and, ignoring the insistent gawking of the priestess, he moved his hand down to study what remained of Inuyasha's chest. It was not as deep as he had believed. Morstua had seemingly meant to maim, not kill, not immediately, at least. 

"W-will he...will he live?" Kagome asked, her voice wavering. 

"He will need the sap of the Hahaoya no Shikyu if he is to survive," Sesshomaru said as he stood, wondering if the hanyou would manage such a journey. 

"I-I have the locks of hair that Lucidity gave us; we can use them to get passage back to the Isle." 

"Her hair?" 

The priestess sniffed and wiped the tears from her cheeks as she peered up at him. "When you were injured, Rusuban told us about it. That's how we were able to return to the Isle so quickly. If we put a strand of hair from the Guardian into any body of water, a boat will be summoned to take us back to the Isle. Anyone with permission can, so long as the hair was given, not taken." This newfound information was intriguing, but there was no chance to question Kagome further as she dropped her gaze to Inuyasha once more and eased the back of her hand against his forehead. "He's starting to get a fever, like you did. We should find Jaken and Ah-Un. And Lucidity.... Do you think she'll know to meet us back at the palace?"

"This is a question I cannot answer," he replied, lifting his gaze to the sky. There was no hint, no sign. He could neither see, nor detect anything that might suggest where she was. Yet there was something upon the horizon, a shape coming towards them and growing larger.

"What happened, Sesshomaru?" Kagome asked. "How did she get so strong? Do you think she somehow found the source of her power?"

"That is the logical conclusion," he said, thinking of those blue eyes, as he watched the two-headed dragon sweep low, causing the priestess to gasp in surprise, and soon land before them, much to his irritation. "What is the meaning of this, Jaken? You were told to leave."

The words froze the imp in place before he could so much as rise from the saddle. "You-you didn't send for me, my lord?" he asked. "If I'd known, I wouldn't have listened to her, I promise, Sesshomaru-sama! But Lucidity did come to me. She told me the danger was gone and that I should return so you could bring back the monk and his wife. Was it a trick? Is it not safe?"

Before the daiyoukai could respond, the priestess was on her feet and rushing forward. "It's safe, Jaken, it's safe, I promise. Come on, bring them here. Let's lay them down. Sesshomaru, can you help me?"

Again, his ire was stirred. The monk and daemon slayer had fallen while in pursuit of a common enemy. For that alone, Sesshomaru had meant to use the Tenseiga. It was the knowledge of Lucidity's grief of their passing, however, that was the heavier influence in his decision. And yet realizing that this decision had become an expectation of hers irritated him, as did the request for his assistance from the priestess. Yet, he found himself moving forward in short, quick strides to Kagome's side. She jerked back, wide eyes gaping up at him from beneath her hair, her nervousness palpable, as he fixed her with a cold stare. Then he turned and gathered up the body of the woman from Ah-Un, while Jaken hopped down. Soon, the daemon slayer and monk were laying side-by-side near Inuyasha and he was exchanging Bakusaiga in favor of Tenseiga. 

"It _will_ work, won't it?" came the tentative question from the priestess.

"Silence," ordered Sesshomaru as he felt the gentle pulse through his father's fang. And then he saw them, the minions of the Netherworld, moving around the bodies like insects and preparing to take the dead on their journey to the afterlife. Sesshomaru recalled the last time he had unsheathed Tenseiga, how it had remained silent in his grasp, and realized that some part of him detested drawing the Sword of Heaven. The lessons from his father had been well learned, he thought, as he cut through the creatures before silently returning Tenseiga to its scabbard.

The monk and daemon slayer opened their eyes simultaneously, taking fresh breaths of air together, but it was the monk who sat up first, aware of what had happened, of what he had sacrificed, while the woman peered around, dazed and bewildered. By the time the monk came to understand that he and his wife were alive and Kagome cried out her relief and darted forward to embrace them both, Sesshomaru walked away, out onto the battlefield. The ravaged land was decimated. Nothing lived, not even the trees, and the utter stillness of the air seemed ill suited in comparison to the absolute power that was revealed to him this day. He had never felt the likes of it before. So'unga, perhaps, had been formidable and of similar origins. And yet, the Sword of Hell was merely a key to the realm that Morstua and his family ruled. However, the power of the Guardian....

"What the hell happened?"

That voice-

Sesshomaru turned around and was taken aback to see the hanyou sitting upright, adjusting his haori to cover the raw wound on his chest. His three companions were on their feet and staring down at him, but it was Kagome who predictably broke away and flung her arms around his neck. "Inuyasha!" she exclaimed. "I didn't expect-but how?" 

"What do you mean 'how?'" he scoffed in return. "Takes a lot more than that to kill me."

"But...but you've been poisoned! You shouldn't even be awake, let alone-"

"I feel fine."

A loose term, it seemed, as Inuyasha was having difficulty finding his footing. Kagome attempted and failed to keep him from rising. Yet the moment he managed, the hanyou's legs went out from under him and he collapsed to his hands and knees, cursing and panting, with his wife crouched beside him and the other two humans standing over him.

"How is it possible, my lord?" asked Jaken, who had joined Sesshomaru at his side with Ah-Un's reins in hand. "When you were infected, you were unable to-"

"The blackness was made in the Underworld; I would not be shocked if Tenseiga purified some of its affects when it revived Sango and Miroku so close by, but he should still take the sap to make a full recovery."

Sesshomaru felt himself grow still. He'd had enough surprises for the day. Being caught off guard, even by her, was irksome. Downwind, her scent had evaded him. Yet there was a more unusual aspect to this. He listened to her footsteps as she entered his field of vision. His gaze slid over to her and he knew he was not mistaken. The others were watching her as well, their expressions riddled with uncertainty, because they, too, felt the same thing he did: nothing. Her aura, her power, was completely hidden. She appeared as threatening as any common human. Her eyes, alone, marked her as different, in a way that the strange coloring of her hair and skin did not. The whites had returned to her eyes and the pure blue of the irises swept over everyone in turn. 

"L-Lucidity?" murmured a tentative Kagome.

The woman raised a brow, but before she could speak, Inuyasha barked out, "Could someone explain what the fuck went on here?! Where's that asshole at?" Yet the only answer he received was a vague finger pointed towards the sky. "What's that supposed to mean?" snapped the hanyou. "Is he dead or what?"

She gave a single shake of the head. "He can't be killed. It's a dance that never ends. He and his brothers are sealed away when they cause trouble, but it's only ever temporary. I wanted a more lasting solution and broke his body down to the barest specks. He'll be orbiting the earth as such until I see fit to release him."

"You...you did what?!"

"How did you manage that?"

"How long will it last? What will happen when he comes back?"

"Doesn't that take immense concentration?" 

No reaction beyond a simple shrug was given in response to the volley of questions. "It takes no more concentration than breathing," she said, "and is no more difficult than walking. And when Morstua returns, we'll play the game again. He must have been locked up for some time in the Underworld, perfecting his creation after testing it out in the north. Though...the Black Death...quite a bold move for him; he normally does not kill so many on his own."

"How do you know all this?" asked a stunned Miroku.

"And how did you defeat him so easily?" demanded Inuyasha.

"You did it, didn't you?" Kagome interjected. "You found the source of your power?"

"And the memories of the late Guardian that came with it," was the answer that had Sesshomaru sliding the claws of one hand together. He had suspected as much, but hearing it confirmed aloud filled him with a tension he did not care for. And the expressions of astonishment from the others declared that no one but the daiyoukai had known that this would happen. A moment of silence pervaded. No more information was offered, no questions asked. Inuyasha was straining to his feet again, this time accepting the assistance of the priestess and the monk.

"Her memories?" echoed the daemon slayer. "Everything about her? You know everything she did?"

A mute nod was the response. 

"But," Kagome began, "but you're still...you're still you, right?"

The question was met with a bitter smile and those blue eyes fell shut as she rubbed at her temple. "It's...difficult to.... I'm not sure how to explain. I wish there was a way to show you all...."

"Are you or are you not?"

Startled, her eyes snapped open and she looked over at Sesshomaru, surprised for one reason or another. Was she not expecting him to speak? Did she find his impatience with such a topic unprecedented? Whatever the reason, he did not care. "Answer the question," he demanded.

"If you're polite and say 'please,' I might," she replied, folding her arms, and promptly smiled at the sight of his lip curling. "Honestly, Sesshomaru, what happened to my being too stubborn to be overwhelmed by memories of someone long dead?"

"You do not amuse, Lucidity," the daiyoukai said, his voice rough with displeasure. And even so, the twisted knot inside him unraveled and he had to refrain from approaching her, lest he lose control. There was...relief in hearing her words, that familiar tone she used when taunting him, how the corners of her mouth turned up, even if there was a subtle strain in the movement.

"But it's over?" asked the daemon slayer, who stood close to her husband, both their clothes torn and bloody from the fatal wounds that had been inflicted upon them. "It's really over?"

"Yes," said Lucidity. "It's over." And yet, Sesshomaru did not miss the way her gaze wavered as she turned from the group. So abrupt and effortless, Morstua's ending had been. Did she speak the truth? "Let's get Inuyasha that cure from the Hahaoya no Shikyu, shall we?" she announced. "I, for one, am not going to carry him if he decides to faint."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What are you hiding, Lucidity? And would you dare keep it from your beloved pup?


	50. Chapter 50

The Vipers were gone. 

The danger had passed and Lucidity had dismissed them from the Isle, even refusing the requests of a few who did not desire to leave. She was no happier with their presence than the daiyoukai, it seemed. With both their obligations to the agreement having been fulfilled, the snakes went without protest in the end and Sesshomaru was left to consider the outcome of this...peace that had been established. First the Panther Tribe and now the Viper Clan. What other blood feuds would be laid to rest under his reign? What more would be created? What allies and enemies would he make while he conquered the lands in pursuit of his empire?

An empire, he'd come to realize, that would be built under the shadow of the Guardian of the East's domain, an aspect he had overlooked until now. It was she who truly ruled over this world and he was...uneasy that he had not thought of this when he had claimed her, for it was the woman he'd marked, not the Guardian. Whether she was destined to possess greater physical power than he, the daiyoukai had not cared, had even encouraged her to discover the source of that power, and now she had. She'd inherited the mantle of her predecessor, a birthright, and Sesshomaru found himself questioning if he had ever understood what that could mean, when it came to personal concerns, that is. He was not accustomed to thinking in such terms and it irritated him as much as his uncertainty about the matter. 

And there had been no opportunity for a discussion since their return to the Isle. It had taken some time to deal with the Viper Clan. Masami, in particular, had been insistent with Lucidity and Sesshomaru had caught sight of them in deep conversation before the Clan had set out. That, in itself, did not strike him as odd. Yet when he saw her hand over a strand of her own hair, it brought an irrational surge of annoyance to the surface and he'd nearly ordered Lucidity to explain herself when she returned to the steps of the palace where he stood. The glance she'd cast in his direction, however, kept him silent. Her indifference to his presence was a reminder of more pressing concerns. He did not question her, nor did he interfere while she saw to matters inside the palace. She extracted the sap of the Hahaoya no Shikyu herself for Inuyasha and tended to the needs of the monk and daemon slayer, as well. And then there were the other humans to contend with, the ones who had taken up residence on the Isle. Sesshomaru learned that most had been infected and were brought here to be cured. And regardless of this being a safe haven, it was his understanding that none wished to remain longer than was necessary. 

This much he garnered from the long-winded answers Jaken was giving him when the daiyoukai had asked what Lucidity was doing that was keeping her in the palace. Night had fallen and Sesshomaru had come to sit on the ground on the far side of the Hahaoya no Shikyu, out of sight of the veranda, shortly after the Vipers had departed. Jaken, smelling of the rich foods of the banquet hall, joined him not too long ago, when a streak of light still lit the trees of the forest and the calls of birds could be heard. Now it was the insects that sang while the imp continued his prattling. 

"The servants are unnecessarily eager," he was saying. "Always moving about. You can't walk down a single hallway without running into those strange girls. At least they're willing to talk, and I have to admit you want for nothing here. Fresh food, fresh bedding, warm fires. The place is filled with people, but there is plenty of space for everyone to have their own quarters. There was mention of the servants bringing tea for everyone later. I wonder if they will come out here to serve-"

"Jaken," Sesshomaru called from where he was leaning against the roots of the Hahaoya no Shikyu, the mokomoko gathered behind him and his eyes closed.

"Er...yes, my lord?"

"It makes no difference to me if you wish to spend the night inside."

"What? No, I'm...I'm perfectly fine right here, my lord. I assure you I'm quite content and will not leave your side for luxuries-I mean, those other accommodations. I'm not so-GAH!"

The sudden shriek had Sesshomaru glancing over and even he was startled to discover Lucidity, dressed in clean robes, standing serenely in their midst. It was only after she appeared that the daiyoukai caught her scent, the light fragrance of soap and humidity in her wet hair, as she stood over Jaken, who picking himself and his Staff off the ground. Straightening his hat, he peered reproachfully up at her. "Where on earth did you come from?!" he spat.

"That is...a very involved answer," she replied in a vague tone. "I did not mean to frighten you."

"Hmph!" Jaken folded his arms, clutching the Staff to his chest, as he turned away, his eyes shut in haughty disapproval. "Just be careful. Next time I might set you ablaze on reflex."

"That would be counterproductive," said Lucidity.

Jaken opened one eye to look up at her. "And why is that?"

She didn't answer, but walked around him and settled beside Sesshomaru, close enough that her knee brushed against his thigh. He was...pleased, for once, to have his solitude completely shattered by their bickering. It was familiar in a way that little else was in this place, such as the manner in which she was watching him. The weight of her gaze was a heavy thing, several steps beyond mere contemplation. She was studying him, yes, but saw more than what was physical. She was utterly quiet, completely still, a statue carved of flesh and bone. He could not fathom what gripped her mind in this moment, and when his eyes met hers, he found a stranger peering back at him. It lasted no more than a heartbeat, and then she blinked, let out a breath, and life and substance filled her countenance.

"Should I return to the palace, my lord?"

Sesshomaru's mouth pressed into a thin frown; he had forgotten about his servant. Her presence made him neglectful of his surroundings, the severity realized after he discovered that Jaken had moved closer without his noticing. "Go," was his sharp command that had the imp bowing and striding out of sight. Sesshomaru watched him disappear around the Hahaoya no Shikyu before turning his attention back to Lucidity. "He has taken a liking to you."

"What makes you say that?" she asked.

"Absent danger, Jaken does not voluntarily leave my side," he told her, but received nothing in response. She was staring, as though fascinated, at the hands she had spread out upon her knees, her gaze fixed and unblinking. This behavior went beyond being absentminded and had Sesshomaru reaching out. She didn't react until his fingers closed around her wrist, and even then she merely glanced up, her expression suggesting that she'd just remembered she wasn't alone. "You are unwell," he said, but she shook her head. "The memories, then?" 

"Make it difficult to focus," she admitted.

He had assumed as much. Releasing her, he started to lean back against the tree, only to stop when she seized his hand. 

"This helps," she said. "There are too many thoughts, too much information. Having to sort through it, through my memories and the endless years that are hers, it's.... I know it's possible, somehow, but the process takes...time."

Sesshomaru dropped his gaze to the pale fingers resting over his. The decision was immediate and he gave no more thought to it than he did when drawing a sword on an enemy. He dragged Lucidity forward so that she fell against him, his arm sliding around her waist. She was stiff in his grasp, surprised at first, before she relaxed and curled up beside him amongst the roots of the Hahaoya no Shikyu. He heard a sigh break from her as he closed his eyes, indifferent to the possibility that someone would discover them as they were, hidden though they were by the tree. If this was what she needed, so be it.

But with her here, it was a chance to have his questions answered. He wanted to know what had happened on the battlefield, how she'd found the source, what her intentions were in this aftermath...why she had given a piece of her hair to Masami. And yet, feeling the warm weight of her body against his, he was more inclined to simply lay here than to interrogate. Perhaps enough had happened today. Perhaps he should wait until morning. These were not matters that needed to be addressed immediately, after all.

She shifted against him, her head coming to rest on his chest. "You're not hurt, are you?"  

"No," he said. "I require rest, nothing more."

There was a pause, then, "Sesshomaru?" 

"What is it?" 

"I can't stay." 

His eyes slid open and he stared up at the canopy of swaying leaves before he glanced down at the top of her head. "You lied, then?" 

"To Sango, you mean? No, I didn't." Blue eyes darted up to meet his. "The fight is over for them. Whatever happens afterward isn't their concern, but that is not the reason I can't stay." 

Sesshomaru sat up, forcing Lucidity to do the same as she knelt back on her heels. "Explain." 

"I may have killed the blackness, but the damage wasn't eradicated," she said. "I can feel it. It hasn't stopped infecting the land, making animals and people sick. I have to destroy it before it spreads outside of my domain."

An unexpected sense of resignation filled him. He was...disappointed that she had obligations that took her from the Isle. This was a significant change, one he acknowledged that he did not fully comprehend. Yet he would. One day he would understand, however long it took. He'd understand her power, her title, as surely as he did his own. For now, though, he accepted what she said, even if he found himself questioning a certain issue. "What are you not telling me?" he asked. 

She blinked at him, then suddenly smiled and leaned forward so that her forehead pressed against his shoulder, obscuring her face from view. "There really is no fooling you, is there?" A heavy sigh broke from  her. "It's Morstua's brothers. They will not be happy with what I did to him. It violates whatever rules of combat his family perceives; I will not be surprised if there is retaliation." 

His brothers? This was not the first time Sesshomaru had heard mention of them, but he had not expected such a reckless move from one who had shown herself to be more calculating when it came to strategies, regardless if certain actions in the past argued the contrary. "Why would you take such a risk?" he asked.

Another sigh was heard as Lucidity settled back onto her heels once more. "What Morstua did to me...what he was planning to do, he admitted that it was not his idea. He and his brothers are plotting something and they needed me for it. But there's something else, something Morstua said that makes me worry. He told me that one Guardian was enough for now, but that I would suffice in the meantime. It sounded as if they already had one of my sisters, but that can't be possible. Mother would have let us know if that happened, given us some type of warning. So, I can't be certain what he meant, if he meant anything at all or if he just insisted on rambling while having nothing of value to say." 

"You speak of their plan to father children by force with the Guardians," he said, and the words alone stirred a fury to life that had his claws flexing. "Is it possible?" 

"No Guardian has ever had a child," Lucidity said. "The East, after she became mortal, is the only exception, but yes, it is possible. And if the Princes of Death worked together, they could bring a single Guardian under their control. An army, is what Morstua mentioned. That was his plan alone, to create an army of offspring with the Guardians, but his brothers are planning something else and it is making me uneasy." 

A flicker of comprehension quenched the churning anger inside the daiyoukai as he considered her a moment. Of course, he should have realized. "Your actions against Morstua were a ploy to draw them out," he said and she nodded. "How long until they seek vengeance?" 

Lucidity shook her head. "I don't know. It could be tomorrow or a hundred years from now. Time has little meaning for them; they don't notice the passage of it as mortals do. But when they do come, it will be for me directly," she told him. "Morstua's brothers are...more to the point, less whimsical, than he is, and also more dangerous; he plays, they don't, at least not to the same extent. With the help of the other Guardians, there is nothing to worry about, I promise, but you cannot let anyone else know. Understand?" She leaned forward, eyes narrowed. "This is not their fight and I won't have them interfering."

The force of her words and the vehement of her gaze actually had the daiyoukai pausing to consider the consequences should he go against her wishes. He had already experienced what she was capable of doing to those who stood in her way and that was before she came into her full power. What she would do now, he was uncertain of and that left him uneasy in his doubt. "As you wish," he eventually said. "But you will not attempt to incapacitate me the next time you go into battle."

She raised a brow and he noticed a subtle twitch in her mouth. "I could always imprison you instead," she offered. "It would be quite easy."

His eyes narrowed. "I will not forgive such an offense lightly."

"Nor would I commit one so lightly."

"You rendered me unconscious mere days ago."

"It was for your own good."

"Lucidity-"

"Will you kiss me?"

The abrupt change in topic was enough to unbalance his line of thought and he blinked at her, wondering if he had heard correctly. She drew back slightly, head tilted to the barest degree, her expression smooth and serene, waiting in patient silence. "What's this now?" he eventually asked and a small smile spread across her lips. 

"Where I'm from, instead of biting, people have a habit of kissing when they bid their partners farewell," she told him, "and in greeting. A brief exchange or one that lingers, depending on the situation." 

A strange custom, he thought, but that was not the issue at hand. With her so close, he was able to reach up and take hold of her chin, but did not embrace her. "Is your mind so addled that you believe I will permit you to leave my side again?" he demanded with a scowl. 

"I want you to come," she said softly, and he blinked at the candor, taken aback, though his grip remained firm as her hand came up to clutch loosely at his wrist. "And I don't want to leave, but I have to. The blackness put its roots down deep underground and that is where I must go to keep the plague from spreading; and you can't exactly follow me through the earth."

Suddenly, she turned her head and touched her lips to his palm. Her eyes fell shut as she laid her cheek in the curve of his hand, covering it with hers, and he felt the last of his anger drain from him as he watched her, once more wondering at the change she'd wrought in his life, one that he was no longer displeased by, in spite of the fact that change was not easy for those set in their ways, especially a prideful daiyoukai. Yet he wanted this, wanted her and what she brought him, this taste of repose even in the heart of war. She calmed him in a way he'd never known before and, in the same turn, could incite a passion-whether furious or otherwise-that no one else was capable of. And yet he was afflicted by this obsessive need to claim, to keep her from any others who sought after her, never mind their reasons for doing so.

As the faces of Masami and Morstua invaded his mind, he became aware of how deep the desire inside him burned, the desire for her to stay, and found his hand slipping from her chin to the back of her neck. He did as she wished and dragged her forward, pressing his mouth to hers in a firm embrace. He eased her onto the grass, with the roots of the Hahaoya no Shikyu on either side of them. She went with him, near limp in submission, but at the same time he felt the hard grip on his haori, tasted the hunger in which she feasted on his mouth. 

What would have happened if he not been able to follow her? How close had Morstua come to taking her from this world, of killing them all? The memory of the Mother's mark, how it had never ceased to burn during the entirety of his search, left little room to doubt what the alternative outcome would have been. It reminded him of another time he'd had to hunt her down, a time when he'd nearly been too late, and the truth he'd be forced to admit in the face of relief when she'd been found alive. He was a fool, a sentimental fool, no different from that idiot hanyou. 

"Enough!" 

Lucidity's voice was breathless as she broke from the embrace, uttering that single word, but he soon dug his claws into the ground and covered her mouth with his, his teeth closing on her bottom lip, a fang threatening to slice through the tender flesh. And she yielded. As powerful as she was, as easily as she could subdue every last soul on this Isle, she yielded to him as she did no other, moaning for him, her back arching, hands holding tight to him. He pushed against her, his tongue sliding between her lips, even as a vague thought stirred in the back of his mind that this was not the time or place. Her gasp was sharp and, without warning, she turned her head away, panting heavily, and he saw blue eyes dart up to peer at him through white strands of hair. And that was the last glimpse he had before she disappeared. 

Sesshomaru rose to his feet in a swift movement, the wind tossing his hair and fur, and felt the subtle flow of energy caress his skin. The weight of arms was around his neck the next instant and he felt the pressure of lips against his own, before her form solidified and his hands came to rest on her waist. 

"I have to go," she said, stepping back, even as he held fast. "I'm sorry, Sesshomaru, but if I don't leave now, I never will; and I can't do that again."

And, once more, she vanished, leaving him with naught but empty air to grasp at. A soft exhale of acceptance escaped him as he closed his eyes and slid his arms into opposite sleeves, far from pleased by the abruptness of her departure, and yet well aware that there was little that could be done about it. "And do you expect me to wait here for your return?" he demanded of the air. "Do not mistake me for some dutiful mutt." The wind bristled in response; he could still feel her, that whisper of power she contained without effort.

"Mount Fukuro...three days...." 

The words in his ear were so brief and faint that he nearly believed he'd mistaken them for a gust of wind. Yet he was not one for the whims of an imagination. He knew the truth, as surely as he knew that it was the Guardian of the East who circled him, incorporeal, absolute, and his. 

And then she was gone. 

* * *

 

A simple task it was, to purge the land. It was no different than healing her own body of the blackness, the same as how a daiyoukai of Sesshomaru's standing could heal injuries with his power alone. The north was riddled with infection, twisted and grotesque beneath the crust of the earth, as though one had cut open the lungs of a smoker. The mountains of the final battle were only the beginning. The rot was cleared away, the trees reduced to ashes, and any creatures suffering from the ill affects were quickly put down. The abilities of the Guardian were wielded without thought, without struggle. The demonstration she'd shown in the cavern, where she and Sesshomaru had nearly drowned, was a flicker of a candle compared to a great blaze. Now...now she could barely recall the reason it had been so difficult for her to grasp the concept of what she was capable of. 

Then again, Lucidity had trouble recalling other matters of her life. Her human life, to be precise. It was the life of the late Guardian, dumped into her brain in the span of a heartbeat, that made matters...interesting. She didn't lose herself, her sense of identity, not exactly, at least; but she was forced to pick memories apart, like sorting colors, trying to find what went where. It was like a torrent of information being downloaded onto a hard drive that did not have the capacity and threatened to fry the motherboard. It was a wonder she didn't suffer from a complete system overload from the very beginning. And the longer she worked on clearing the infection of Morstua's little pet, the more challenging it became to organize her thoughts. As hours stretched into days without rest, determined as she was to rid this world of the plague, she knew it was taking its toll. Accessing the Guardian's memories was what made it possible to use her power so flawlessly; she hoped this would change once she became more accustomed to everything. Several times now she'd lost her train of thought and had had to stop what she was doing. During these moments, she knew only that she needed to keep moving forward, because she had important work to do. Always important work. And she couldn't forget. It might take her a few minutes or longer to regain her focus-she couldn't be certain-to drive away unnecessary memories or distractions, before she could resume.

On the Isle, it had been worse. Ghosts were everywhere. Not literally, of course, just echoes of a life that were not hers. She'd heard voices and laughter when there were none, saw faces and structures that were not there, and for a moment hadn't even recognized Kagome or Inuyasha when she'd brought medicine from the Hahaoya no Shikyu. It was only when she left the palace and ventured out into the courtyard that it became easier to focus. And when Sesshomaru touched her, it had been.... Gods, it had been wonderful! The clarity! He anchored her to the here and now, to the point where she'd been afraid to let go, to leave his side at all. Though, in the end, she had no choice. Off or on the Isle, with or without the daiyoukai...she would manage.

No food. No water. No sleep. No rest. Nothing different from what she'd become accustomed to. And it had been three days. Three days of sweeping across the countryside, of having no physical form, with nary a chance of respite, save when that addled mind of hers-as Sesshomaru had so charmingly put it-gave her trouble. However, the end was finally in sight. The trail of the blackness stopped here. She remembered the layout of this particular village she had visited only once before. She could also quite clearly picture the land as it had been, long...long before the idea of a settlement was ever conceived. Nothing but a feral world of youkai and humans locked together in a battle of survival, when the sanctuary above the mountain was newly formed and teeming with life. There had been too many owls and not enough space. And now it was so sad and pitiful, nearly forgotten.

Lucidity landed upon the same precipice as Sesshomaru had months ago, albeit under greatly altered circumstances, and peered up at the ancient torii. There was a flicker in her vision of fresh wood and paint and an utter lack of vegetation before she blinked away the past and saw for herself the one who awaited her arrival as though he had expected her hours ago. Kaidame smiled from his perch on the rotting gateway, then promptly glided to the ground in a display of his great wingspan. And then his wings quickly folded in on themselves to create the cloak of black feathers that draped upon his rounded shoulders.

"Kaidame," she said in greeting.

The Seer swept a deep bow in her direction, hand extended as if in offer, not quite the custom of this country; then again, he was aware of that. "My Lady Guardian," he said upon straightening. "You honor me with your visit. What would you have of me?"

What, indeed. Lucidity was frustrated, to say the least. Not only from the work she had so recently completed, but because Mount Fukuro was one of the last memories of her predecessor. She remembered, quite vividly, the ultimate purpose for this sanctuary and was not happy with the way it had been perverted. And yet...could she find it in herself to blame an old man who had been driven insane by grief and loneliness?

"You've plundered our collection," she eventually replied. "That was not the reason Mount Fukuro was put here. It was meant for your people to have a home to call their own and for them to safeguard the East's possessions in return, not to be used as a trading post."

"In my defense, I was not aware of this until your arrival to our era. The origin of my home has become myth, even to those of my family's line," said Kaidame. "What was known for certain was that a Seer must always remain on Mount Fukuro until She whispers."

"Mother, you mean?" Lucidity asked.

"Yes, yes, my dear, She whispered to me that you were coming. She gave me the pieces, showed me the path, but you were always the one who was meant to travel so that you might put the puzzle together. Tragic, I know. The trials were grueling. The price was steep. Yet was not what you gained worth what was paid?"

Lucidity stepped forward, closing the distance between them until the old bird had to crane his head back to maintain eye contact. "And your price, Kaidame?" she murmured. "You stayed here because it was your duty. You're the last of your people, but you could not leave. If you had, I would not have known about the Four Sisters. You sacrificed much to pass on a simple message. Why?"

Long before she finished speaking, those large dark eyes had grown heavy with tears. Clear trails glistened along his cheeks as he wrung his gnarled hands together. "My people are gone. We are not the first to vanish from history with little show for our time here, nor shall we be the last; however, the world will always continue with or without us. What sort of father would I be if I did not set the proper example and fulfill my duties as Seer to ensure that life went on?"

"But your daughters are-"

"You may have your doubts about existence beyond death, but I do not," he said sternly. "I know how disappointed my daughters are in me, that I have traded secrets and treasures, but I could never break their hearts and abandon my role. And...O! My Lady Guardian! The broken heart needs to be mended." Without warning, he reached forward and seized her wrists, his eyes gleaming, as he spoke in a low, earnest voice. "Understand! Understand! Mend the broken heart or tear it out! It is the only way!"

Lucidity, her hands limp in his grasp, stared down at the owl. "The only way? For what?"

Kaidame blinked, then promptly backed away, releasing her wrists in the same movement. "Only way...? What are you asking me, my dear?"

"You said-" she began, but he cut her off with a sharp clap of her hands.

"Oh, yes, yes. There is only one way to end this. I have been waiting a long, long time, and would be so grateful if you would oblige," he said with a wide smile.

For a moment, she could do no more than gape at him, completely bewildered, before it clicked into place. His mind was so fragile, more so than hers, broken with grief, just as his heart was. There was no other way to interpret his ramblings as she heaved a great sigh. "You want me to kill you," she said.

His eyes closed, that bright smile still in place. "It is my dearest wish, young Guardian. My duty has been fulfilled and I would like to see my family again."

The pity that swept through her was just as before: a physical ache that threatened to undo her. Had she been so inclined, she could have wept then and there. Yet she had had her fill of tears this year. She was tired of crying, of fighting, of struggling. A moment of peace was all she desired and she could understand the craving Kaidame must feel to have just that. Whether they agreed upon the meaning of death did not matter. He'd had enough of this world and was ready for the bliss that came next, regardless if he found it in oblivion or another existence. Coming to stand before him, Lucidity took his face in her hands and kissed the top of his hand. "You have my gratitude, Kaidame," she whispered, and then broke his neck.

* * *

A single flame danced in the palm of her hand. She gazed at the flickering spark of heat. Each of the four was hers to command, but none so pronounced as the air. It was the reason for her aversion to swimming, ever since she'd been a child, the reason why Mizu had been the weakest of the Four Sisters of the East; Mizu would have been in her element if she'd been a Sister of the South. And no one could command fire as the West did, but Lucidity could do this much, perhaps more, but enough to create this tiny thing that floated above the scar of the seven-pointed scar. She could give the old Seer a proper send off with this.

Her attention shifted to the pyre that she had built in front of the great waterfall of Mount Fukuro. A breathtaking sight of beauty, the landscape, and yet...so empty. Kaidame had given everything to tell her what she needed to know and, no matter how far gone he was or what actions he had taken against her, she mourned for him, for his isolation, the losses he had suffered. As her gaze lingered upon the shrouded figure, she wished there was more she could have offered than the hollow comfort of death. If it was within her power, she would have returned his family to him. Yet even the daughter of a deity worked within certain limitations. All she could do, in the end, was send a simple thought to her Mother, asking Her to grant Kaidame his last and final wish, before guiding the dancing flame into the pyre.

When it was time, she'd scatter the ashes. She would remain on Mount Fukuro for however long it took. And, of course, she could not leave just yet; she was still waiting. It wasn't until the fire was burning high that she retreated inside the mountain. And it wasn't until she had wandered deep into the cavern of her predecessor's possessions that she felt it. Like a breath of fresh air, the presence brought the first sense of comfort she'd had in days. A certain tension fled her body at the mere hint of it. In spite of the relief his arrival brought, however, she did not venture out. She started to, yes, but stopped when her gaze roamed across the artifacts. Nothing more than trinkets and souvenirs, once upon a time, selected out of curiosity and as a new way to mark the passage of time, to keep track of the impossible. The rise and fall of so many societies and empires, whispers barely heard, and gone before they could be understood.

Lucidity could not pull herself away. A sea of memories stretched out before her. Had it been such a grievous mistake to come here? The blackness had been eradicated. She had no reason to venture out. There was nothing in need of her attention, right? And she had to stay until he arrived. Her gaze dropped to the scroll in her hands, at the strange characters that looked like little more than scratches at first glance, until she remembered the meaning of one, followed by another and another, and soon she was reading through the scroll as if it was written by her own hand. She was still staring at it when she heard the echo of footsteps inside the vast cavern. And by the time he was beside her, she had done little more than beyond shifting her gaze to the table that was littered with several piles of these recordings.

"The Seer is dead," Sesshomaru stated, though she knew he had a question, perhaps several, in there.

"It was what he wanted," she said.

"You did not come here to kill him?"

"No...."

"Why, then, would you have us meet here?"

"The last of the blackness went no further than a few miles from here and I had...unfinished business with Kaidame. He pilfered what was not his." She laid the scroll down on the table and peered up at the daiyoukai, whose golden gaze lingered on the old parchment before sliding over to her. "Mount Fukuro belongs to me. Everything in here was my predecessor's."

Sesshomaru gave no reaction, save to peer back at the scroll with renewed interest. Long fingers tapered with claws, strong enough to reduce enemies to ribbons, touched the parchment with care and moved over the words, though he could not possibly know where one ended and another began. "This is the late Guardian's writing?"

"Personal journals, yes," said Lucidity as she watched him trace the etchings. "Written with symbols of her own creation; she didn't want anyone else to know her thoughts. No harm now, I suppose."

"What does it say?"

"Nothing of import," she told him, even as she saw his attention shift towards the small mountain of scrolls. "She brought these here after she decided to give up her position. They're about her future husband and how she came to her decision, the deal she made with Mother and all." Lucidity noticed a furrow in Sesshomaru's brow, the slightest pull at the corner of his lips, but gave it little thought as she reached for the scroll. Yet when she began to roll it up, his hand shot out and he grabbed hold of her wrist so suddenly that she dropped the parchment. She didn't even have a chance to look up before he spun her around to face him, his grip hard and unforgiving.

"And you would do the same?" he demanded in a fury so abrupt that she could do little more than stare.

"N-no. Of...of course not," she eventually managed. "Why would you even-"

"You make it difficult to believe otherwise," he interrupted. "You have told me yourself you did not want the burden of being the Guardian. And now that you have the means to surrender your mantle, how am I to expect that you will not do so?"

"How do you think I was able to take on the mantle in the first place?!" she snapped with a rush of anger. "I accepted it. I accepted every last ounce of responsibility that it came with. I had to give myself over to my Mother because of that. I gave up my humanity, and I did it for _you_!" The hardened lines of anger melted from Sesshomaru's expression. His face was a near flawless mask of control, save for his eyes when he blinked at her, that minute widening of surprise that softened her own rising temper. She let out a sigh and glanced at the wrist still caught in his grasp. Physical touch...she could not believe the difference it made, her thoughts were so clear in this moment. "I did it for you," she repeated. "Morstua wanted to torture you, because of me. The things he said he'd do to you.... He was going to kill you, in the end, though. He was going to kill everyone, but you...I couldn't lose. I'd rather die and I know you understand that. So, why would I surrender my power when it is what keeps Morstua trapped, when it keeps you safe?"

There was no response from the daiyoukai, who continued to study her in contemplative silence. And then, slowly, his grip loosened until he was folding his arms within the sleeves of his haori while she leaned back against the table, peering up at him. "You claim I need protection?" he asked. "That is your reason for accepting your duties?"

"Does it matter, my reason?" she asked in return. "Clearly you want me to, but...." She paused as a sudden idea occurred to her; after all, Sesshomaru had never expressed desire for her to take the mantle, only that she find the source necessary to win a war. "You don't...need the power or status a Guardian might bring you. That's not what you want out of it. It's time, isn't it? If I was human, we would hardly have more than a few decades together. Youkai can live for centuries. And a Guardian...a Guardian's time is infinite. That's why...."

She turned her head towards the scrolls and her hand moved across the smooth wood of the table to touch the fragile parchment. How ironic, for her predecessor to relinquish everything, because it meant nothing without him, while she, Lucidity, took on everything for the same reason. It was the only way to to truly build a life with a daiyoukai of all creatures. Without thought, she drew one of the scrolls free. She could see the fresh color it had once been, blank and waiting to be filled, feel the smooth texture beneath her hand while transcribing a rush of thoughts and emotions that had never existed until this moment in time. Except...it wasn't her hand or her thoughts. It wasn't this time. It...was the other.... She had to remember, as she had with the words, where one ended and the other began. If only she could remember where she began.

The scroll was torn from her fingers and Lucidity was left staring at an empty hand before she felt something hard seize her by the chin and force her head around. A firm warmth pressed against her mouth and she blinked rapidly as her surroundings came into sharp focus. Yet she could see nothing but those golden eyes so close to hers, hooded with familiar magenta markings and strands of silver threatening to obscure her view, until the youkai lord drew back, only to gather her up and place her onto the table.

"Sesshomaru, what-?!"

"Did you not say this helps?" he cut in. "Your mind was drifting."

"Yes, but-"

"You must learn to remain aware of your surroundings."

"What are you-"

"If this is how you must be taught, so be it," he said, as if this was...truly an inconvenience. She could feel his hands on her thighs as he kissed her again, all fangs and tongue. Her hands moved up to his chest with the initial impulse to shove him away, at least until he eased her legs apart. Then she recalled what was, beyond all doubt, her own memory of being beneath the Hahaoya no Shikyu, of the daiyoukai above her, pushing against her, and how she had nearly succumbed to his unspoken demands. Gods, how she had wanted him! And now....

Lucidity moaned as his mouth descended onto her throat. Excitement raced through her body, quickened the maddened drum inside her chest, and caused that familiar ache of desire to tighten with anticipation as she tilted her head back, more than willing to let him do as he pleased. She didn't know where this unexpected urge of his came from and didn't care, so long as he did not stop. Her skin hummed as she felt her robes being lifted, gathered around her waist, and then his hand was gliding over an inner thigh. And yet he didn't touch her as he usually did, but dragged her closer to the edge of the table and pushed her legs further apart as he stepped closer. She caught sight of him reaching for the seams of his armor while he urged her down with his fangs in her throat, forcing her to lean back on an elbow. The echo of that cumbersome armor falling away soon resonated throughout the cavern, quickly followed by the clamor of swords, and suddenly he was there, kissing her with a fevered passion of a most deprived lover and pulling her towards him.

"Sesshomaru!" she panted in a hoarse whisper when she felt the rigid length of him between her thighs. He said nothing, but she saw him grit his teeth before his forehead came to rest against hers and he pushed himself against her. Her back arched and her free arm hooked around his shoulder, clutching hard at the nape of his neck, as he filled her.

And then he was moving, so fast and without warning that she could barely gasp. There seemed to be a sense of desperation in his touch. More than physical, more than lust, but no matter how she tried, she could not clear her mind long enough to understand what it was. Her thoughts were spinning away as she moaned, completely at the mercy of the daiyoukai, and could hear him in return, those heavy grunts that escaped him with each stroke. Their hot breath mingled together and she could feel the sweat beading along his forehead before his eyes flicked up and met hers. Catching sight of such raw and intoxicating yearning reflected in that molten gold undid the last thread of control inside her. For a single heartbeat, she was lost, drowning, with only one anchor to the world, only one possible way that would lead her out of these depths. She didn't remember being shoved down or when he lifted her legs around his waist. She didn't remember when he began to devour her mouth as if it was the last meal he would ever partake in. All she knew was that she couldn't breathe, couldn't think, couldn't do anything but cling to him in sheer desperation as she was swept up in a mindless ecstasy that could bring her to tears at any moment as she cried out. And then she was floating, drifting on a lazy tide out into open waters, and wanted nothing more than the current to take her away...far, far away. 

"Release me, woman."

The voice was guttural in her ear. She couldn't understand at first, until the order was repeated, softer, and soon became aware of the wood biting into her back, the weight resting on top of her, and the warm exhale of air caressing her neck. Only then did she notice that her nail were embedded in the skin of Sesshomaru's neck. Gently, she pried her fingers free, but could not stop the thin lines of blood that gathered in the wounds and ran down his pale skin. It never occurred to her to do anything else but lean forward and drag her tongue over the crimson trails, delighting in the sound of his sharp inhale, however faint it was, before she settled back onto the table and the daiyoukai pushed himself up, a hand on either side of her head. She shuddered as she felt him draw out and tuck himself away, leaving her with a dampness between her legs, which gave little room to doubt that he was more than sated for now. Though why he was staring down at her, she wasn't certain of. She was curious, yes, but it wasn't a high priority, finding out what was on his mind. What _was_ a top priority was...

Nothing. 

Absently, Lucidity brushed her fingers through the silver hair that had fallen over his shoulder. There really was nothing that demanded her immediate attention. For the first time in months, she had no obligations, no concerns or responsibilities that would pull her away. It would not always be so, but, for the time being, she was free to do as she pleased. A smile started to spread across her lips. She needed to convey this to Sesshomaru, to let him know that she was completely his, and reached out, winding her arms around his neck. There was no resistance as she drew him towards her, but then, without warning, he stiffened. She didn't need to guess as to what had caught his attention as his gaze darted to the side. A whining creak gave the briefest suggestion that something was wrong. Sesshomaru began to straighten, but it was too late. Under the abuse of age and too much weight, the table collapsed beneath them, and Lucidity let out a startled cry of surprise as both she and the daiyoukai were promptly buried beneath the mountain of dusty old scrolls. 

It was dark in their tomb of parchment. Nothing but the sound of bated breath filled her ears, at least until Sesshomaru sat up, a growl low in his throat, and sent the scrolls cascading off of them. Lucidity pushed herself up onto her elbows, half-buried, with his body pinning in her in place, unless she simply decided to fling him away. But it was rather...entertaining to see that scowl of his as he grasped at a single scroll that was trapped in his hair and threw it aside. She brought a hand up to cover her mouth when he caught her eye, his expression far from pleased. 

"Do not-" he began, but it was too late. She couldn't contain it and fell back into the mess, arms around her stomach, as she erupted into fits of laughter. And when she heard that growl in response, it only made it worse. It was a miracle she didn't pass out from lack of oxygen, she was laughing so hard.

"By the gods!" she managed to gasp, wiping the tears from her eyes. "I'm sorry, but the look on your face-brought down by a table-" And she lost it all over again, even smacked the floor with a fist, almost wishing she could regain control of herself. Almost. It seemed such a silly thing to find so comical, but she couldn't help it; there had been so little to laugh about these days and she wanted to enjoy what she could.

There was a movement above her, a pressure against her, and a pair of lips brushed along her ear. "Enough of your foolishness," came the soft, frustrated snarl, and she had to bite down on a knuckle, trying so very hard to calm herself and failing miserably. Even as he dragged her upright and into his lap, she was still shaking with mirth. It wasn't until his lips caught hers that she finally fell silent. His arms slid around her, crushing her to his chest and forcing the air from her lungs before he finally allowed her to breathe. She was panting, and yet so was he, if only just. "You are fortunate that I find your laughter preferable," he muttered. "Though I would have you silent about what transpired here." 

She snorted softly, grinning, as she straddled his lap, arms snaking around his neck. "Preferable to what? Tell me and I'll keep quiet." 

A frown creased his lips. And though she was quite accustomed to his stoic seriousness, the lack of simple banter on his part punctured her tiny bubble of elation, making her doubtful, even a tad anxious. "Insufferable woman," he said. "It is obvious enough that you needn't ask. I will not be manipulated into answering pointless questions." 

Lucidity blinked, then pursed her lips together. "You are such a pain," she replied. "And I believe that was an order, not a request, so tell me, Sesshomaru; I want to know." Of course, he didn't answer, merely glared at her, but she expected no different. But then she heaved a great sigh and laced her hands through his hair, her forehead coming to rest against his as he had done to her. "You are so cruel. Will you at least admit that you amuse me on purpose?" 

"You presume much, woman," he said, his voice rough with a shade of irritation.

She closed her eyes. "Sesshomaru...?"

He grunted in response, nothing more than a low noise in the back of his throat.

"Say my name."

There was a pause, then, "Why do you insist on playing this game?"

He did not sound angry, not even annoyed, simply curious. And yet she found herself winded with a tension that crippled the happiness of the moment. He was here, with her, and nothing was going to come between them. And, somehow, she was afraid that all this was some sort of dream, that it was about to be ripped from her grasp like some cruel joke that she would never recover from. A new form of torture, perhaps, from Morstua and she was, in reality, still trapped in his clutches, shoved down into the muddy ground of the battlefield with her body torn open for his sadistic delight. The thought sent a thrill of terror through her and she quickly buried her face into the crook of Sesshomaru's neck, taking a deep breath of his familiar scent. At first, he gave no response, but then she felt his arms tighten around her, drawing her close, safe...secure.

"It's been days," she whispered, and heard a soft exhale in return. "Let me hear you say it...please." 

"Look at me," he ordered, and, after a moment, she leaned back rather reluctantly to meet that passive gaze of his, before he unexpectedly took hold of her chin, lifting her face toward him. "Your laughter is preferable to this, Lucidity; there is no reason for it."

No, there wasn't. She was being ridiculous, she knew. So much had happened, though, so many forces that had pulled apart and upended her life, to the point that she could scarce recall what existence had been like before she came to this era of fear and blood and death. She was so frightened of what was to come, of what might happen. The dance with death was not over.

And yet...Kaidame was right. The price she'd paid was worth what she had gained. She understood this better than anything else as Sesshomaru brushed his lips over hers and she tasted his warmth on her tongue. In a heartbeat, she would surrender everything she had, everything she was, for him and him alone.

Her youkai lord.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Holidays! 
> 
> Here you all are! Another update, a bit longer than usual. And it's not over yet! I don't know when I will be able to get the next chapter posted. It's going to be a very busy week with the holidays and some other stuff happening, but I promise there will be more!


	51. Epilogue

Inuyasha was pacing.

He hadn't been able to sit still since nightfall. It was one of those rare occurrences when Sesshomaru could understand the irrational behavior. And there had been an abundance of it for most of the evening; though he did not care for the outbursts of angry panic, having to listen to the string of curses that would now and then be emitted by the hanyou. Mute fidgeting was easily ignored, while the sound of this endless pacing was endurable; but when the hanyou worked himself into a frenzy, it was difficult for Sesshomaru to stay his hand and refrain from knocking his idiot brother unconscious. Such actions, however, were unnecessary for this situation. In truth, no action on his part was required. There was no reason for his being here. What happened to Inuyasha and his woman was no concern of his. And yet any choice to be elsewhere had been removed for him. In this tangled web of fate, he was forever trapped in these matters that were...familial.

"Is it normal to take so long?" 

The small voice of the kitsune child broke the stony silence of the courtyard. Those who'd been forced to congregate in the area peered over at him simultaneously, including the daiyoukai from where he lounged upon the roots of the Hahaoya no Shikyu. The kitsune shifted nervously from where he sat in front of the campfire, more anxious about the answer to his question than drawing so much attention onto himself. 

"Every woman is different," said the monk, who'd been standing apart from the group, but now approached the young youkai. "There is no way to predict how long these things can take. Sango was in labor for nearly a full day before she gave birth to the twins, and I've heard stories where labor can last for up to two days." 

"Yes, but that doesn't turn out so well for the mother," muttered Jaken from his resting place near Sesshomaru, who gave no indication of noticing Inuyasha throwing a rock at the imp's head.

Even after Jaken fell over with a yelp of pain and a shouting match quickly ensued between him and the hanyou, Sesshomaru ignored the commotion as he turned his attention onto the empty veranda. There had been a flurry of servants coming in and out of the palace when the men had first been exiled from its halls, but it was quiet now and had been for some time.

This was Lucidity's doing. He would not be here if it hadn't been for the offer she'd recently extended to Inuyasha and Kagome, with the arrival of their child so imminent. Exact details were unclear, but he'd gathered enough to understand that the priestess was anxious of the dangers when birthing offspring, from the life-threatening act itself to the predators, youkai or otherwise, that were attracted by the scent. She had been relentless and difficult, which in turn made the hanyou desperate to ensure she was placated. A simple conversation with Lucidity had resulted in this gathering on the Isle, where she had offered a safe haven to the priestess. A week spent in Inuyasha's village had finally ended when the priestess announced that it was time and the group had returned to the Isle by way of ferry. 

Sesshomaru did not care for the idleness of the past few days. Winter was over and even a daiyoukai could become restless in the silent chill of those months. These weeks of spring were the time to seek out new opponents, to find a challenge worthy of his attention, not to confine himself to domesticated dwellings. Though being in the village meant being in the company of Rin, Sesshomaru had had his fill of humans for now. The moment Lucidity fulfilled her promise to the priestess, he would make his demand to leave; he had accommodated her wishes long enough.

His teeth gritted at the thought of such an exchange. There continued to be moments when he became frustrated with certain aspects in this way of life, of having to consider a partner when it came to making decisions. Mere months were not enough to undo several centuries worth of being on his own, answering to no one, being accountable to no one. It would take far longer to grow accustomed to these changes Lucidity had brought into his everyday existence. And yet, he already found himself...dissatisfied with their current arrangement.

A scream reached his ears, almost too faint for humans to hear, but brought his musings to an abrupt halt. The scent of fresh blood filled the air before he saw Inuyasha dart forward and extend a hand for the wooden door. That is, until another cry was heard, coupled this time with a familiar command, and the beads of subjugation glowed. Inuyasha hit the ground with a resounding thud and groan of pain. His limbs gave a feeble twitch, and then he began to push himself up, only to be brought down by a second scream of, "OSUWARI!"

"Why-why is she doing this to me?!" Inuyasha groaned as Miroku and the kitsune wandered over.

"She must be really angry with you," the child observed with an amused smirk, which widened further when a third command was given and Inuyasha's face struck the floor. "Very angry."

"I believe it is safe to assume that our young Kagome is in a good deal of pain right now and sincerely blames you, as most women are prone to do in this situation," said the monk. "And unlike Sango, who very much wanted to do the same to me, Kagome has the means to make you suffer with her. I suggest distancing yourself from the palace so that the beads cannot be activated until it is safe."

"I'm not going anywhere!" Inuyasha panted, struggling once more to rise. "She can Sit me as many times as she likes; I don't care. I'm not about to leave when something could happen to her."

"Hmph," grumbled Jaken, who had not moved from his spot. "Serves the hanyou right. At least we know that the priestess lives if she still has breath to scream and you will not be required to use Tenseiga, my lord."

Sesshomaru did not reply, but continued to observe from beneath the Hahaoya no Shikyu. He could hear the flurry of activity inside the palace, the numerous and indistinguishable voices of women, and the harsh cries of Kagome, giving the command one more time until she became silent. Inuyasha was on his feet a moment, but suddenly froze; and Sesshomaru, too, paused at the new noise that resonated through the air: the unmistakable wail of a squalling infant.

"Ah," came the monk's whisper. "She's done it."

"Is she okay, do you think?" murmured the kitsune behind the clenched fists he held to his mouth.

There was no reaction from the hanyou as he stared at the door, arms at his sides; yet his entire body was rigid, ready to spring, his tension palpable. And when the echo of footsteps was eventually heard, he moved back, as though expecting an ambush, and almost flinched as the door was eased open. Sesshomaru could not recall seeing Inuyasha so pale with fright at the sight of Lucidity's impassive face when she emerged from the palace. She gazed at Inuyasha, so collected and stoic that even Sesshomaru was doubtful of what awaited the hanyou. And then she stepped aside and gestured towards the open doorway.

"They're waiting for you," she announced.

Inuyasha didn't move. "Kagome...is she...?"

Lucidity gave him a hard frown. "They're waiting," she repeated. "Go." And Inuyasha went, sprinting into the palace, with Lucidity shutting the door behind him before turning towards the monk and kitsune. Tears were filling the eyes of the child as she crouched down in front of him. A hiccup could be heard as he tried to speak, while the monk hung his head with a heavy sigh. Sesshomaru stood when, without warning, Lucidity suddenly smiled and ruffled the kitsune's hair. "Don't cry, Shippo," she said. "Kagome is fine! She and the baby are perfectly healthy, I promise."

"W-what?" Shippo stammered. "But you looked so.... I-I thought...."

"That was for Inuyasha's benefit," Lucidity said with a grin as she straightened up. "I'm sorry to make you two worry," she added with a glance to the monk. "Kagome really was waiting on him. There are some traditions from her era that involve the father after the baby is born and she wanted him there."

"Traditions?" repeated the monk. "What sort of traditions?"

"The sort that you can ask Kagome about later," Lucidity answered with a smile.

"What did she have?" the kitsune asked, brimming with excitement now that the worst was over. "Is it a boy? Girl? Twins like with Sango?"

"Who's calling me now?" asked a new voice.

"Sango, my darling!" exclaimed the monk, converging on his wife as she stepped outside. "How is our Kagome? And Inuyasha? What are these traditions that Lucidity refuses to tell us about?"

"Oh no you don't!" the daemon slayer said. "It's bad enough that she wanted him in the birthing room at all. I will not tell you what else she wanted done. Inuyasha seemed so furious about being called in there, but...I think he might have been angry about something else."

Her gaze came to rest pointedly on Lucidity, who stood with her arms behind her back, that same playful smile on her lips. "Is Rusuban taking care of things?" Lucidity asked. 

Sango nodded. "Yes. I'll be going back in soon. I just came out here to-" 

"Sango! Sango!" called the kitsune as he hopped up onto her shoulder. "What's the baby? Will you tell me? I bet it's a boy. It'll be like having a little brother around! When can I see him? Can I go now?"

With the kitsune prattling away, he and the humans paid little mind to Lucidity when she broke from their midst and made her way over to Sesshomaru and Jaken.

"That was a dirty trick," said the imp, and she laughed.

"Probably," she said. "But Kagome wanted him there as quickly as possible and he wouldn't have listened otherwise."

Jaken gave a snort. "What business could a man have in a birthing room anyway?"

Lucidity responded with an odd gesture of fingers making a cutting motion in the air, only to say, "Trust me, you're not ready to know."

The imp opened his mouth to reply, but immediately fell back when Sesshomaru stepped forward. She turned her attention onto the daiyoukai, arms behind her back once more, still beaming over what had happened this night. She was euphoric, he knew, and was also aware that she was more agreeable when her moods were lighter. "Come with me," he ordered, and then turned on his heel to head into the forest.

"See you later, Jaken," he heard her say, followed by the resigned groan of the imp. A moment later, she had fallen into step beside him. What was more, she laced her arm through his as soon as they were out of sight of prying eyes. Sesshomaru glanced down at the soft gleam of yellow that her hair had become during the shift of seasons, before she suddenly leaned her head against his arm, the mokomoko obscuring most of her from view. This was not the first time she had embraced him in such a way, though he still found the act to be strange. "So, how do you feel about being an uncle?" she asked with a soft chuckle. "Uncle Sesshomaru. Has a nice ring to it, don't you think?"

"I know you are aware of my thoughts on the matter," he replied.

"Yes, yes, I am...very much aware," she sighed, though her tone remained cheerful. "Well, no matter. I'm happy for them. I wonder how Inuyasha will handle fatherhood. At least it will be easy for him to scare off unwanted suitors. You have a niece, by the way, Sesshomaru."

Sesshomaru said nothing and Lucidity did not press further. Though, the thought of that foolish hanyou as a father was a peculiar one. Hardly more than a child himself, loud and brash; yet he had no doubts that Inuyasha would be a fierce protector of his family. It mattered little to the daiyoukai, however, what happened to the offspring of his bastard half-brother. To witness the dilution of the Inu no Taisho's bloodline dwindle to nothing over the generations did not appeal to Sesshomaru. The way he perceived humans may have been challenged and altered in recent years, but seeing his father's legacy overrun with mortal blood, bred out and forgotten, made him...uneasy. The idea behind it, of all traces of youkai vanishing from this world, filled him with a discomfort he was not accustomed to, because he'd come to realize he would have done the same. If Lucidity had still been human, his decision would be no different than what it was now. 

A movement, coupled with a soft grunt from her, had him glancing over to see that she had drawn away and was rubbing at her temple. The gesture had become frequent enough that there was no cause for alarm, and yet the corners of his mouth pulled down when her forehead knitted. 

"Lucidity?" he called, and she shook her head, peering up at him. 

"I'm fine," she said. And when his eyes narrowed, she merely smiled before laying her head against his arm once more. "I know next to nothing about delivering a baby. I had to rely heavily on the memories; it's...surprising, how many births Satomi helped with. I know she'd become attached to the humans on the Isle, but I hadn't realized it was to such an extent." 

Again, he remained silent. He did not care for the times when Lucidity found it necessary to delve so deep into the late Guardian's memories. Though it was happening less often, he'd become too accustomed to taking certain measures when it came to dragging her out of that void. The moment on Mount Fukuro had been the first of many, but he did not always use the same method. More often than not, a touch, a word, or a simple strike to her person was enough to focus her attention, even if she tended to react unfavorably towards the latter. He would not be pleased if that course of action was needed tonight.

Their footsteps were the only sound in the area, minus the insects and nocturnal creatures that had taken up residence on the Isle over the last several months, as he led her deeper into the forest, trudging the paths that had become well known to them when sleep evaded, as was often the case. And when they neared a familiar structure of rock, Lucidity untangled herself from his arm.

"I'd suggest a race," she said with a sly grin, "but we both know that I'd win, so I don't see the point."

"I have no interest in petty competition, regardless of your misguided beliefs that you could best me," he replied, then took to the air.

"Your silver tongue of insults is as sharp as ever," came the whispered words in his ear, absent a body to accompany her voice, before the wind rushed over him and he was alone in his ascent onto the mountain. Yet she was there when he reached the ledge just beneath the peak, smiling at his indifference. Her mood was, if anything, persistent in its playful banter. 

"You are becoming vexing, woman," he said, and caught a glimpse of teeth as her smile widened with a hint of mischief, which forced him to accept that there would be little chance of calming her this evening. Without a word, he turned from the sight and settled onto the ground to face the cover of stars that blanketed the sky, thick and bright in spite of the glow from the full moon. And Lucidity, rather than sit down, came to stand behind him instead. It didn't surprise the daiyoukai when he felt a tug on his hair, soon followed by her fingers running through the strands. "If you make cords of my hair again, woman, I will throw you off the mountain," he warned.

"It was just the one time," she said, daring to sound wounded. "And no one saw. Besides, I think a few braids would improve your look. Maybe when the flowers start to bloom, we could give it another try and add some color next time."

"Then you had best make your peace with death prior to making the attempt," he replied. The ringing response of laughter filled his ears and the fingers of both her hands brushed through his hair, drawing it back with her nails scraping lightly against his scalp. Over and over, she repeated the movement, saying nothing, but creating a lull with her touch, which succeeded in dulling his senses, causing him to drop his guard. Only on this Isle, isolated from danger and out of reach of enemies, would he take such a risk. Only with her, did he close his eyes and allow his mind and attention to fall away, completely at his ease. He was uncertain of how much time had passed in this manner when he felt a pressure around his neck and the warmth of her arms against his throat. His eyes slid open, realizing she had crouched down to embrace him, as he stared at the vast canopy of the forest below, recalling vividly the first night he had spent on this mountain. 

"So, is there a particular reason you decided to come here or did you just want to get away from everyone?" Lucidity asked after a short while. 

Sesshomaru didn't answer, but swept his gaze toward the sky. Absently, he reached up and took hold of her wrist, his grip light. A moment later, he felt the press of her nose in his hair and the caress of lips near the point of his ear. Her aroma washed over him, filled with the warmth of spring and the promise of conquest that another year would bring. And when summer arrived, her appearance and scent would shift again. Would her body hold the heat of the sun? Would she taste like the energy of battle? He could only wonder at what the coming months would usher in, as each season flowed into the next.

And there would always be characteristics he did and did not enjoy with each one. Regardless of the weather, however, there would always be that moment he favored above all others: the moment before the dawn when nothing stirred, when nocturnal creatures went to sleep and before those active during the day had risen, a moment suspended in time, when there was nothing and no one, save her, a moment he could scarce tolerate if she was not there. It was the moment he anticipated above all others, when he wanted her the most, because he no longer cared for the solitary existence of the predawn. He would have her at his side. Always.

"Sesshomaru? Are you going to answer my question or stare off into space? .... Yo! Fluffy?"

Even when she was irksome.

"Do not call me that, woman," he said, the words strained, while his eyes remained fixed on the sky.

She snorted softly and began to stand, her arms starting to slip from his neck, though he still clutched at one of her wrists. "Well, since I didn't think you'd appreciate 'beloved pup,' what would you have me call you, then?"

With a growl, he yanked her around and seized her with his other hand to drag her down into a heap in his lap. She collapsed with a sharp gasp and gaped up at him, lips parted and eyes wide with apprehension, as he glared at her. He was well aware that she was questioning the wisdom in provoking him, unless the rapid beat of her heart suggested otherwise. Yet the quickening of his own pulse, no matter how mild, was an aggravating distraction, one that he, in part, blamed her for. Another growl, forming deep in his throat, rose from him as he gathered her close, her body rigid in his grasp. A noise escaped her, perhaps in protest, but rarely did he listen to those. Her hands twisted their way into his haori, catching strands of his hair in the process. Yet she did nothing to stop him from lifting her to him and snarling his displeasure hard in her ear. She shuddered, ducking her head and looking away, as a trembling breath escaped her. He could hear the echo of her heartbeat and saw the rush of color across her face. The response was thrilling in its submission and his hand moved up the side of her neck to clutch at her jawline, palm against her cheek and fingers buried in her hair, forcing her to lift her head to him. His mouth found the curve of her ear and the low rumble of his voice resonated against the soft shell of flesh.

"Husband," he murmured.

Lucidity's jolt of surprise was so sudden and so violent that it broke his grip and dislodged her from his lap. She landed rather hard for so short a fall, sprawled back on her elbows and legs entangled in the long robes she wore, and stared at him in a shock so absolute that she seemed to have forgotten herself entirely. He folded his arms within the sleeves of his haori and watched her in silence as she slowly closed her mouth, licked her lips, and made an attempt at speech. "What...what did you say?" she managed in a hoarse whisper, though they both knew that she had heard him.

"That is the answer to your question," he replied. "That is what I would have you call me."

"Y-you want...? But...why?"

He blinked. "I should think it obvious," he said. "I am no longer content for matters between us to remain as they are."

She sat forward, visibly agitated in her disbelief. "But we've...we haven't even known each other for very long. How can you be certain that-"

"I made my intentions clear when I marked you," he said, the claws of one hand clicking together. "The length of time makes no difference to me; I would have the same result in the end." She didn't respond, merely stared up at him. And though her lips did part a couple of times, she soon closed her mouth and swallowed, a sense of uncertainty filling her gaze. A burning anger churned inside the daiyoukai and a tension seized him that had his jaw working fiercely and his claws scraping against his forearm. "If it is not what you want, woman, then tell me now and be done with it," he demanded.

"S...Sesshomaru," she murmured. "That's not.... What I mean is...I'm...."

In one swift motion, he stood, towering over her so that she had to crane her neck back. "I will not be made a fool of. If you are unable to articulate an answer, then I can only assume-"

The force of the unexpected impact brought him to the ground, knocking him onto his back and the air from his body. He glared up at Lucidity, who was pinning him with a leg on either side of his waist and her hands threatening to bruise his upper arms in her hard grip. His chest heaved in an effort to regain his breath as she leaned over him, her expression hardened with anger. "Do not assume to know my thoughts, prince of youkai," she said. "Haven't I told you already that you are the only thing I am certain of? Being with you, in the midst of all this madness, is the one bit that makes sense to me. So don't...don't answer for me, don't take the easy way out of what you believe is rejection, when all it is...when I'm just...just scared."

She looked away with a scowl, her fingers loosening, before she sat back, arms coming to rest on her thighs, while Sesshomaru pushed himself upright onto his hands, a frown on his lips. His temper was subsiding, only to become riddled with confusion in return. "What is there to be frightened of?" he demanded.

She didn't reply, but her scowl deepened and he caught a glimpse of clenched teeth before she lowered her head, hair falling forward to hide her face from view. He remembered another time, beneath a tree, when she had attempted to hide from him. And he did the same thing now as he did then, which was to move his fingers through her hair and pull the locks behind one ear. Her eyes were closed when his knuckled brushed along her cheek. She shivered at the touch, shoulders hunching slightly, and then let out a soft sigh that nonetheless shook in spite of her efforts.

"I'm afraid that one day you will change your mind," she murmured. "I'm afraid that you will tire of me or realize this was a mistake, that you should have waited longer to make sure and...I don't want to lose you, is all."

That was all? Those were her fears? Fears that...he could not fault her for. Sitting upright, his anger forgotten, he drew Lucidity against him. There was no resistance from her as she tucked her head beneath his chin, her fingers curling into the neckline of his haori. "Idiot woman," he said, his eyes falling shut. "You, too, presume what you should not. Understand that I have believed that any union with a female would be for the purposes of my empire, nothing more than a contract that would benefit us both. I did not think it possible for any other reason." A finger scraped against the hollow of his throat as Lucidity pressed herself closer and he knew she understood, without his having to speak another word. His arms, which rested around her waist, tightened briefly. Was it possible, he wondered, to salvage this-

"I love you, Sesshomaru."

His eyes snapped open and he glanced down at what he could see of Lucidity, with her face so well lost to his line of sight, baffled by so abrupt an admission, one she had only ever uttered once before, when she'd believed they were to never set eyes on each other again.

"I don't have to hear it," she continued, "but I have to say it. My father often complained that I hardly ever told him and...it's become one of my biggest regrets." She pulled back, her solid blue gaze meeting his and he found himself...hesitate at a soft smile that curved her lips. "I don't want to regret anything with you. So...my answer is yes, I will call you my husband."

A tension eased inside him that he had not been fully aware of until that second. He said nothing; there was no need. Or rather, he was not given a choice, as Lucidity leaned forward and sealed her lips to his, easing him down into the grass. He felt the caress of her tongue seeking entrance and his lips parted without thought, his arms tight around her. A year from now or a century, his decision would not falter. Whether she was mortal or immortal, Guardian or human, he would have her regardless. It was just as she had said on Mount Fukuro: he did not need the power or status that the daughter of a deity would bring him. He wanted only....

His eyes sprang open once more, but Lucidity never noticed. She'd drawn back, to lay her head on his chest. He had to swallow, to steady his rising pulse lest she hear, as an abrupt understanding slid into place. His hand buried itself into her hair, as though he intended to never release her, and he stared up at the expanse of stars, at the endless shimmer that seemed to him the greatest mystery of all. However, in this solitary existence, in this single breath, he realized what Kaidame had truly meant that day in early autumn when they had bargained, when the old Seer had told him where to search for what he needed. And it had led Sesshomaru to his ultimate opponent, to his perfect prey, to...

The heart of his territory.

 

_~FINIS~_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, dear readers, we have reached the end! Of The Odds of Fate and 2018! An early Happy New Year's to everyone! 
> 
> And a monumental heap of gratitude to those who have stuck with our Sesshy and Lucy all the way through and to those who came in long after TOF was underway! I also want to sincerely apologize! I know I said that I intended to wrap up the story and at the time it was perfectly true. I'd always planned on at least a little something to come after TOF. It wasn't until I introduced Morstua that I came across a wonderful idea! 
> 
> So, that being said, who would like to have a sequel? 
> 
>  
> 
> Also, some fun tidbits/rough translations. Bear in mind that I am not an expert, so I do apologize if anything is grossly incorrect: 
> 
> Hebi: snake  
> Mamushi: Japanese moccasin/pit viper  
> Masami: truth, snake  
> Kaidame: to hoard  
> Mount Fukuro: Mount Owl  
> Hahaoya no Shikyu: womb of the mother  
> Sagashite: find  
> Rusuban: caretaker  
> Hogosha: guardian  
> Morstua: your death


End file.
